Episode two is out now on Patreon, where the rest of the series will live ✨ www.patreon.com/zelphontheshelf

when i tell you I GASPED with excitement at this youtube notification

I fully appreciated Tanner's "I hardly know her" quip about the author's name. Thank you for that gem. 🙏

Polygrip is a brand of denture adhesive. He's saying that the dude had dentures.

I feel like this kind of reaction to "mistakes" in ultra-religious spaces where it's almost scripted of how you're supposed to react (being disappointed, thinking your child will go to hell or they're *this* close to stepping over to the bad side) directly prohibits a kind of natural curiosity from parents about their kids. Because especially in this situation a conversation about peer-pressure and dealing with different values in friendships and how to identify and stand up for your own values would be so necessary and healthy, and they wouldn't have to punish him for being this perceived bad person. But then again, learning this would also bring him a step closer to dismantling his own mormon faith so whomp whomp. Great episode and happy new years you guys

This might be off topic, but after hearing about that new Moroni movie, I want to see someone do The Book of Mormon in the style of a Zach Snyder movie like 300. That would be hilarious!

We made a short film in youth based on this book, it's somewhere on film, and that terrifies me.

Tennis Shoes was published by Covenant as was the Board game. Most people don’t know that when Deseret Book Refused to sell books from Covenant Publishing that’s when Seagull Book and Tape was born. Then the son of the owner defrauded the book business, it separated to its own company, they were all pretty awful people in general, and the church not wanting competition bought it all up. The end. I worked at Seagull when Tennis Shoes was popular. Hot seller. As strangely enough Wes ‘Sex is like an Apple’ by Brad Wilcox… which frankly would be great to see you guys do a take on. Especially with the part where he tells young people how if they view porn they’ll think about it in the temple and (as he screams in the audio) ‘Will not be WORTHY of eternal life and exhalation!!!!!!’ (Repentance be damned)

So excited to re-live this nonsense with my favorite book club!!

i had this series growing up. don’t remember reading thru more than like half of the first book before leaving it to collect dust on the shelf

I'm so glad I'm not the only one who had dreams as a teenager about drinking alcohol and then waking up and feeling guilty about it. 😅😅😅

I was just thinking a few days ago about how this would be a great series for you guys to read! I had to check out this video as soon as I got the notification

Tennis Shoes was my jam. This series and Harry Potter were the two book series I pre-ordered before their releases in the late nineties and early 2000s. I think I've only read the first eleven books and I think he's still writing the final book. This is gonna bring back a lot of buried memories, haha.

I believe Polygrip in this context refers to denture adhesive.

To be fair, Chris Heimerdinger was a convert as a late teen so I think he had more experience being around alcohol. And if I remember correctly he came from a dysfunctional family with an alcoholic father so I'm sure he has very bad feelings about alcohol.

Polygrip is a denture adhesive. I think they still sell it.

So happy to see a new post by you two!

I really enjoy your reading and commenting these mormon books. Wish you would post more to us non-patreon listener.

I LOVED THIS SERIES

So excited to see you reading this one!!! It was one of my favorite series growing up (I don't even know how many times I relistened to/reread it) and I feel like it was one of the better things I got from Mormonism/the thing that made me give the mildest shit about the scriptures because at least it was funny. I haven't felt like I could put myself through it again for the last while because a part of me worried that it would spoil the fond memories I still have, so it's fun seeing it in this context. I always really liked the sarcastic/melodramatic tone that the author uses a lot with his characters, and I do think the interactions tend to be interesting/carry more depth and personality than a lot of the other Mormon fiction I've had the misfortune of reading. The first book was alright, but I do think it improved a bit more over time and Megan and Stephanie are probably my favorite characters. (This is all said, tho, just based on my memories of it from almost three years ago, pre my binge into trying to understand what was wrong with the church, undoing a lot of negative cultural conditioning and becoming very leftist, so take that with a grain of salt, I guess.) The moments that are extra Mormon are pretty cringe but there's fun in the rest. Anyways. Best of luck with reading through it. I'm sure you'll make it even more entertaining.

My parents were divorced, and my dad listened to this book (and the many sequels) with us every other week on the 2 hour car ride between their homes. I'm recently deconstructing, and this book still has a special place in my memories. Guess I'm over to Patreon, cause this hour went by so fast!

Holy fuck, the Go Ask Alice reference, I used to love those books and forgot they even existed

My mom and I met Chris Heimerdinger at Deseret Book twice SOOOOO very long ago. Been a hot minute since I thought about these!

"Put your hand in the box, Jamie." "What's in the box, grandma?" "Pain."

Happy New Year! Glad you guys are back! This is horrifying!

I'm going to take two guesses what the book is about before watching the video. Either it involves time travel (like the classic "Texting through time with Brigham Young" by Cristie Monson) OR it's about the Three Nephites helping a boy with first world problems.

Also… Poligrip is denture adhesive. A LeBaron was a sort of the Mazda 6 for of its time. Sort of sporty. Solid daily commuter but not something In would think of as a soccer mom or dad car. Just for references sake.

I'd never heard of this book before. It's wild, but I will admit to chuckling at some of Jamie's one-liners. (I can call him that--I did four years of karate, lol) Also, hope you both have a great new year!

Fun fact: Go ask alice was written by a mormon mom. I think she made it up 😮

Wishing everyone healing in the new year :)

I was hoping you'd get to this series! Yay!

I have been waiting for this! By the way, you could try this, "Welcome back to the channel all our lovely youTube people, White and delightsome Nephites! marcus

I'm so excited for this series! My family was obsessed with this book, My cousin would put the audio book on every night and fall asleep to it. I read it when I was maybe 13 and I remember being terrified by the Mormon kids' nightmare that is this first chapter. Thanks for helping me deconstruct this phobia indoctrination, haha ❤😂

Honestly, I could do without any more Jack Weyland (sorry) because there are SO many cringey mormon reads I could throw out, this is just one of my middle school favorites you’re tackling now 😂

I think polygrip smile probably has something to do with dentures as well, that's a brand of denture adhesive

At donner, Grandma Tucker is giving "There have always been Starkadders at Cold Comfort Farm!"

I love that you guys are doing this!! My brother in law used to read these to me and my siblings when were quite young and I thought it was so wild and insane lol. I still think that. There are certain lines that you read that brought back some memories. It’s too bad the rest won’t be on the main channel. Sadly I am literally unable to be a patron currently due to a lack of a financial situation, but it’s way up there on the list of things I’m purchasing when I actually have a bank account and real income.

Thrilled for this journey together 🎉

Polly grip holds dentures 😅

i’ve never clicked on a youtube notification faster!

New video 🎉🎉 hope you guys had a good holiday season!

I grew up in a small town in the 90s/00s. The lack of things to do is why there were so many "mallrats." Unless your friend group had one or more "cool parents" who would give you a modicum of space when hanging out, malls were about it. The death of malls makes me curious what replaced them. I guess the ability for multi-player games online and social media allow for it? I graduated high school in 2006, so anyone here younger than me feel free to chime in!

I read these books growing up and my friend grew up in the same ward as Chris Heimerdinger and had his books signed by him, lol. Excited for this one!

I have been waiting for this!!!!!!!!

I ~loved~ these books as a teenager. Absolutely obsessed. When my family went on road trips, we would take turns reading them aloud. These books probably ranked second only to Harry Potter in my heart. He even had an online Q&A forum where he would give teens advice when they asked him questions. I think I asked one to which he responded, and I didn't like his answer lmao After I left the church, when a new book was released, I got it from the library and tried reading it. I don't think I made it past the first chapter. I think Heimerdinger took the books in a direction that was less "fun fantasy adventure with a Mormon setting" and more of a device to carry his own sermons. He wrote like... author's notes, for each chapter, and they became increasingly preachy. Listening to the beginning of the first one here, it reminds me why I liked them so much. Books 3 and 4 were my favorites.

12:28 off to a great start 😂 already wheezing hahaha

I LOVED THESE BOOKS AS PRETEEN! I READ ALL 12 OF THEM. Theyre currently packed away gathering dust in a crate in some storage locker where the light of the sun never touches... along with all my other mormon memorabilia.

So excited for this. Just got surgery today and this will help me get through the pain :) Thanks Sam and Tanner, love your channel!! (I also live in SLC and I miss fresh mountain air lol)

Happy New Year! So stoked for my trip to Salt Lake in a few weeks! If you see this, throw me an insider recommendation for an activity, restaurant, or other attraction! I'm going to check out Deseret, the sculpture garden, and the temple!

The time travel stuff gets even crazier after the first 4 books. I might actually read the 2nd to last book published in 2020. The 14th book will be the last if he ever publishes it.

Ahhh I read these over and over growing up, I'm so excited hehehe

I will becoming a paying patreon subscriber but can promise me you'll do the second book of Tennis Shoes? I've also really missed the Jack Weyland nonsense so that is motivation as well!

Poligrip was a popular brand of denture adhesive.

34:36 Polygrip is a product used to hold full dentures in place. Dentures = fake teeth = fake smile.

i read all of these as a kid and loved them back then. Itll be interesting rereading this on the otherside of mormonism and see if any bits of them hold up

I don’t remember this first chapter at all!! Maybe I always read it super fast because I was excited for the time travel 😅 I also really like one of heimerdingers standalones, Eddie Fantastic. Now that I’m Exmo I’m sure I’ll see the cringe throughout all his books, but they were a staple of my youth!

Oh my gosh i had this entire boxset 😅 and then there was the Passage to Zarahemla movie where they cast the book author as the dad and he was such a terrible actor 😂

I think I went to a fireside he did once. Probably twenty years ago so maybe I'm misremembering, haha.

"arent eyes already 3d?" killed me 💀

When you mentioned the book in other videos i thought its 'tennis shoes among the knee fights' and i wasnt even questioning it. I didnt grow up mormon if you couldnt tell

Omg!!! I went to an LDS middle- and highschool, and I remember this series being in on the shelves at the library, and almost picking them up out of morbid curiosity

Read the whole franchise with my family as a kid.

Omg! I read, owned, and loved the whole series... Back in the day. Damn!

So he drank ONE beer, and now he's an alcoholic?? They're so dramatic, I love it. (And at the same time, it's a bit sad too...)

We listened to these books on TAPE on all our ROAD TRIPS when I was a child. Good times

haha my new years resolution was also to be more bitchy, good luck 😂

I think I tried reading this series about 5 years ago (back when I was more active/believing). I worked at Seagull Book, so I kept seeing people buy it for their kids/teens. So, I rented the first few from the library. Honestly can't remember how far I got. I think I finished the first 2 books. I remember liking them ok. Though, at some point, I think there were some surprisingly intense scenes than what I expected from a BoM/modern day mashup. But I could be remembering that wrong. Never finished the series; wasn't willing to go through 10+ more (increasingly longer!) books. Silly side note, while working there, I made it a point to never read any of the romance novels. We were encouraged to read the books, so we could better convince customers to buy them. But even back then, I was not willing to risk reading cringy LDS period dramas. The novel that stood out to me most was one where the main female character loses her husband, then, apparently goes on to be courted by her brother-in-law?! Could not understand why an LDS author (of all people) would make that there plot! Still, by reading almost none of the books there, I sold enough (earning points), to win a dress!

Ok so true story here I was OBSESSED with this book and when I first started experiencing anxiety as a child I would read this book as my comfort book. Fast forward to a TBM adult I reached out to the writer Chris and he told me god wrote the books through him. I still have the messages on Facebook 😂

Super excited to see the rest 😁

My Mom would make us listen to these on car trips... Brings back memories of stale, old cars and playing pokemon on my gameboy.

I’ve always wondered what USA ‘tennis shoes’ are

If I ever say the phrase “evil and pernicious nectar “ or anything similar to a small child, please throw me directly into jail .

THE WATERS OF SEEEEEBUS?!?

Literally just stopped listening to a Mormon Stories episode for this 😜👟

I have avoided the tawdry LDS fiction you have offered so far, but this one looks butt-splittingly funny. I'm listening. Hurt me!

A mormon book saying it's good to grow up and question things! 😂 When their holy book literally says to be like unto a child!

I took a writing class from Chris Heimerdinger a few years back. We did not get along, to put it mildly. 😂

I believe that we are here for experience. Like some kind of cosmic carnival ride. If we are eternal beings with no beginning and no end. Only makes sense we would want to shake it up with the ultimate ride.

I have a board game of tennis shoes among the nephites

What secret token did Sam show on the thumbnail? Is that from the Second Anointing? When you become a Priestess, Queen and Goddess?

Comment for the algo gods before I’m even a minute in bc I love you guys

re comments at minute 38 about giving kids alcohol when they’re young enough to hate it - this may backfire if you feed your kids “adult” food and they don’t develop a child’s palate. see me at the dinner table at five years old being given a sip of my parents wine, and chugging it as soon as they turn away 😅

New bardbarian class in D&D, only become more enraged the more he sings and dances, then does the berserk in metal sing song. Short skirt, long jacket by Cake is not only an awesome song but specifically mentions crystler lebaron’s. Also grew up with A LOT of Lebaron’s and I’m only just grasping why they are such a massive family.

I used to love this series 😊

My parents let me try wine when I was like 10. I thought it was the nastiest thing ever. they also let me try coffee when I was young. i thought it was nasty when i was a child but i like it as an adult.

My dad read all these books to me growing up. So excited to revisit as an exmo. 😁. I definitely had a crush on Marcos as a kid (wait till book 3 😉).

More please

Ah, I'm reminiscing middle school Mormon me

Did the author drink beer in the name of “book research” ?? - I sure hope not !!

Wow I haven’t thought about these since I was a tween. My older sister had these books.

Dude! I listened to these on audio read by the author for all the male characters and some lady related to him for all the female characters. I thought this was so cool when I was a teen.

We have like 11 of these books still. My spouse read them as a kid because they got them as gifts. I only read one of them and im not sure it was the first, but my mom hated them because we are native american. When we left my SIL asked for them. We refused because even as TBMs we thought they were... problematic. After this first chapter- holy shit im so glad we didnt give them the books. If they want my nibblings reading this propaganda theyll have to pay TSCC more than their 10% for it.

These books were basically the only entertainment available on my family roadtrips growing up and I always got so car sick. To this day the authors voice literally makes me nauseous whenever I hear it. 👍 😂

When I was really young my parents gave me a sip of wine for that same reason and….i stretched my arms out for more lmao, doesn’t always work 😂

not all the blame but a decent chunk of the blame for why I chose to go to BYU-I right out of high school was this book. I think I even listened to the audiobook.Had no idea he was faculty there, took a class with him, didn't know until the first day of class.

For some reason Tanner's french girl/poodle comment took me out lmao

Not apologising when you don't need to...bloody hard for a Brit!

Ahhh the memories 😂 If you keep going after Book 1, The Lost Scrolls is definitely the best one.

Tennis Shoes Among the Nephites was significantly more interesting than the BOM itself. My older brother would email the author as a kid and he'd respond. Seemed like a nice guy tbh

I am 43. Polygrip was used to hold dentures in your mouth. you're welcome.