p.s. It's NOT real! Yet, it feels real, and you SO want it to be real. There's where the manipulation and confusion sets in. In this episode, I let you in on the secret that, much as you want it to be real, it isn't. (Did I mention that?) You need to see that clearly to keep from being hurt.
Empathy is defined in the Merriam-Webster dictionary this way:
"the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner."
Wow! That would be great, however, that's not what you get when you're in a relationship with a Hijackal--a narcissistic, anti-social, or borderline personality. They are not empathy deficient but usually rely on cognitive empathy. That's a darker kind of empathy that is constructed in the mind, but doesn't much touch the heart.
Hijackals use cognitive empathy as a tool to love-bomb you, to encourage you to be vulnerable with them. Then, what do they do with those vulnerabilities? They turn them on you later like stored ammunition, or they use the information to benefit themselves in other ways. Nasty!
HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:
🔹What cognitive empathy is
🔹How cognitive empathy is different from emotional empathy
🔹Why cognitive empathy is unsatisfying...and unsettling when you actually see it for what it is
🔹How Hijackals use cognitive empathy to make you feel safer for a bit and why they do it
🔹Why it's important to recognize the differences between cognitive empathy and the emotional empathy you are wanting but won't arrive
Are you being used and confused by a Hijackal demonstrating cognitive empathy? I'm here to help.
* * Remember, narcissists and other toxic people come in all genders and ages * *
and toxic relationships can be at home, at work, at play... with your parent, boss, spouse, sibling, friend, co-worker.
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I am Dr. Rhoberta Shaler, The Relationship Help Doctor.
Are you in relationship with a Hijackal? That's someone who consistently puts you down, love-bombs and gaslights you, creates confusion and chaos, and causes you to second-guess yourself? I can help you recognize, understand, and make decisions about those kinds of narcissistic behavior…and especially, how to keep yourself (and your children) safe and sane.
No worries about where in the world you live. I work through private, secure video conferencing. So, we can certainly work together to figure a few things out.
CONNECT WITH ME:
Website: www.ForRelatio...
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Twitter: @RhobertaShaler
LinkedIn: / rhobertashaler
Instagram: @DrRhobertaShaler
KZfaq: / forrelationshiphelp
Get my free ebook at www.Hijackals.com
Take my free checklists: www.forrelatio...
Are you looking for relief from the pain, confusion and drama of toxic relationships? I can help.
You can reclaim your personal power. Keep watching my videos on KZfaq to find strategies for changing your relationship dynamics.. When you're ready, let's talk.
You can take advantage of my one-time. new client introductory Consultation here (only $97 for a full hour)
www.ForRelatio...
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#boundaries #Hijackals #toxicpeople #narcissists #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stoptoleratingabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #narcissisticabuse #personalitydisorder
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