Think your family is messed up? Think again. Watch comedians share their most ridiculous family stories on “This Is Not Happening:” kzfaq.info/sun/PLD7nPL1U-R5pgIBSOJV-fL4uIWR-DZbfI

"You know your father once stabbed somebody over snapple?" is quite possibly the best start to a bit I've ever heard lmao.

"Y'all crushing this parenting thing btw"...Beautifully adorable story. Props to dad.

"I was Michael Keaton fighting Michael Keaton" - brilliant

He's a master at set ups and pay offs. That's how comedy is done right.

The pay off on that story was worth it. Emotional and humorous... invite him back again

"... I ain't solve that last one, but I was entertaining enough for Them to end it amicably" 😂😂😂

"This my daughter's room." "I know, you're welcome."

Mexican got on boots

" that's the kid who thinks he's Batman " " no that kid is Batman "

That's amazing. "Just make sure my son never wants to hang out with you". That's love right there.

"My 2+2 game was crazy." Had to pause for a couple minutes while I proceeded to lose my shit.

This guy is a comedian, but above that, he's a fantastic storyteller. Props to this young man.

Him being a kid but talking as a grown man is hilarious 😂😂😂

This was actually a very beautiful story with great comedic delivery and joke writing. So glad I decided to click on it!

Doug Smith, Ali Siddiq, and Gastor Almonte are my favorites so far.

You had me at snapple.

Went to high school wit Gastor 💯he always been funny

“THE RATCHET GASTOR, I KEEP A GUN IN EVERY HOUSE”😂😂😂

Performed on the same show as Gastor at Comix at Mohegan Sun last year. Funny dude, super humble, and the dude can spit! Talented like a mufucka! Good shit Gastor! #respect

"I wasn't even scared of the joker i was scared of Beetlejuice." 😂😂😂

i love it.the way he calls his father his hero. it’s beautiful.

These intros need to lose funding

Lol his dad basically was the big villain behind the scenes after a wild plot twist 😂

The Ratchet? I'm not a rapper. I don't know what that is? - dead

Gastor Almonte is the alias that Batman uses when he goes undercover in the hoods.

Storytelling skills are on point, perfect timing too. 💯💯💯💯

“You’re crushing this parenting thing by the way” lmao

"Cuz when the joker laughs that means some crazy shit is about to go down"😂💀

"damn yall crushing this parenting shit! keep it up!"

BEETLEJUICE! Michael Keaton fighting Michael Keaton Hahahahaha! Rate this guy, never heard of him but Imma keep an eye out!

Very dope story, could connect with this being a younger sibling seeing the "grown folks" doing their thing but keeping me distracted with activities..or having my brothers scare the shit out of me with costumes or teasing. Much respect keep grindin!

Gastor, brother we are waiting for a net flix special!!!!

i’ve watched this video so many times now and it still makes me laugh. he is super funny and an amazing storyteller. by far my favourite one they should invite him again!!

definitely one of the top 3 stories ever on this show

I think his dad is more of "flashpoint series batman"

this guy speaks like a poet. :)

Big Shout to East New York, my once upon a time home, Born and raised. Cypress Hills

Who else always fast forwards to 1:00 so you don't spoil the punchline for yourself?

"But this is my daughter's room." "I know. Your welcome."

I loved this set so much. His delivery and writing is incredible. his adlibs through out the set were perfectly placed.

Props Gastor..congrats on making it to Comedy Central!

I've never actually heard of this dude before seeing this. I like him. He's real polished with his storytelling. Is he at the half hour special level or have CDs yet?

I hope my son can talk about me like that one day. Every kid should look at their dad as Batman

I loved this stand up from start to finish and after. 😭❤️

This is hands down one of the best ones yet. in my top 3

You know, I've watched dozens of these but not a single one ever captivated my interest like this fine storyteller.

This guy and so many others doing these This Is Not Happening comedic storytelling series are SO GOOD!

THIS DUDE IS HILARIOUS!!!! THE END HAD ME DYING

Great dad. Well minus the gun in the daughters room lol. Sometimes directly telling a kid not to do something only tempts them to want to try it more, and they end up needing to learn for themselves the hard way. That was an incredibly thoughtful way for him to keep his son uninterested in ever wanting anything to do with gangbangers or drug dealers.

How have I not heard of this guy? He's tremendous!

This was beautiful. Beautiful and HILARIOUS!

One of the best stories ever.bring him back!

I had to hang on for a moment leading up to the third part, but it was way worth it. Hilarious.

Gastor, this holds up as one of the best I've watched. It'd be dope to see you in my town.

This might be one of the Greatest STORY EVER TOLD 😂😂😂💯💯👏👏 and the delivery was prolific👏👏👏👏

Sorry but the Intro Of "The baby coming." Has me terrified.😂

I watched this thousand times and im still laughing 😂

That was the best story put to humor and made real by real life. Standing ovation from Texas.

They got a real shitty habit of scarin the shit outta me

Yoo lets get more of this dude real shit 😂💯

That Michael Keaton line was hilarious

Dude is seriously an amazing story teller! 👏🏾👏🏾 Props big man!

I can listen to this man talk all day.. 😍😍😍

Excellent comedian. Insulted no particular group, was extremely funny, and told a great story. That is how you do it.

I want something easy like this parenting thing 😂😂😂. Amazing storytelling and super funny.

I think the best part of this story is that he accidentally became just like Batman. In Batman begins they say he's gotta become what he fears to not be afraid and that's why he's a bat. This dude became Micheal Keaton to get rid of his fear of Micheal Keaton and didn't even know it

What a blessing to have a family like that. It’s so many amazing black fathers no one could ever touch their teaching style for their boys to men.

I love his stories about his dad lol.

"I'm not scared of The Joker, I'm scared of Tim Burton movies." Hunny. Hilarious story, gotta show everyone this guy.

Now this is one of my favorites in the series! Top 3, DEFINITELY!!!! That was so good, I love this guy! I’m looking up his podcast!

Dope, he taught his son to be a business owner.

2+2 game is crazy!!, ain't nobody seeing me but 3+3 is next week!!!

Yo this guy is talented. Great storyteller.

Literally the best story I’ve ever heard

Wow he funny as hell🤣😂🤣😂 I like when a comedian is funny without being loud and over the top! Loving this guy!!

this is how you tell a story

This was a beautiful, heartwarming story that also happened to be funny. Wow!

This man story telling is on another level

His dad’s the master mind of his life 🤣🤣 a literal shadow man

This is one of the best stories I've ever seen on this and I've seen alll of them At least top ten.

He is so likable, wanna hear more from this guy!

This man is a genius 💯💯😂😂

One kid would go: there’s the kid who thinks he’s Batman & another kid would go: that kid is Batman 😂🤣

This guy needs a full on show, like an animated series about his life or something

One of my favorite sketches ive heard in a while

this man did everything right. not many comedians can tell a captivating story that is both humorous and lands emotion especially not for a solid 10 minutes. i hope my guy is making business rn bc he’s showing what standup and comedy is about

Never would have imagine there was another Real Batman out here. It's a blessing to have good parents ❤️

This guy.. for real ... we need more of him EVERYWHERE. I can't be the only one that sees he is a straight king. Funny af, had a kid and wife young, got a real G dad that did his thing as a dad raising this king , he got property in flourishing Brooklyn and mans up... I see you 👑

yo this guy always have some funny yet interesting stories

Amazing story telling and perfect timing with unmatched stage presence😂😂😂

This deserves an animation 😂😂😂

*pushes glasses up* Actually, sir, Joker does not fear Batman. He craves his attention and - in some ways - loves him.

Beautiful delivery and he had flava dripping all over his story my G!

Mitchell was spooked 😂😂😁

This is my favorite story so far! 😁

I laughed so hard. This was awesome.

I LOVE this story. Gastor Almonte is an amazing Story-Teller

This is so sweet and wholesome, I love it!

Your dad knew the first place youd go in an emergency, your heart. Thats where id safely and securely and super openly with spouse etc put the ratchet in my house if i had a child too. Good dadding