Only way to deal with a narcissistic person is leaving them, like physically leave then go heal your mind and soul

My ex was exactly like this, whenever he does something wrong I would call him out but instead of solving the problem he preferred giving me silent treatments, it would even go for months. He didn't want to solve anything. When he finally breaks the silence he would play victim and label me as controlling. Narcissists are emotionally draining and they never apologize. I left him, I couldn't stand his nonsense.

I was married for many years to a narcissistic man. I used to do everything to keep the peace and nothing was good enough. Then one day I said enough! We would have an argument and he would consistently tell me he was done with me. I was given silent treatment for days on end. Meanwhile he would so nice to the neighbors, my female friends and kids female teachers. He would see me upset and tell me to get a grip. There was no empathy. A cold cold man. It took me years to get myself to my old self. Please there are red flags before you marry these kind of people. I am very empathetic and loving and these kind of men are drawn to warm and nurturing people. The best thing is keep away and value yourself.

"its ok to be kind & nice.. relationships are not charity.. u don't have to donate love.." ☝️👍👌👏🏻👏🏻

True narcissits can make you give up on love completely.

This dude needs his own show. Wow. I just got Educated. Kudos Zulu👏👏👏👏👏👏💯💯💯💯💯

This is 💯% true I was in that kind of a relationship he won’t solve any issue he will go mute and most of the time he was the one who was wrong. Narcissistic was also arrogant and dictator now he has been with more than 20 women but no one stay a year. He is 55yrs miserable and desperate but it was so traumatising. Thank God am free from that bondage

And yes breaking up with a narccisist is a big fight better be ready.But run run run for your life and never look back.

This Coach is amazing. Please have him on the show often. I've learnt something today. Thank you.

Silence is Golden....If a naccissist gives you the silent treatment, take it as a golden oppurtunity to run away!!! RUN...coz its never over with naccissist....Run💃💃💃💃

I’m grateful for this show and wish everyone had teaching like this growing up. I’m also concerned about the opening remarks about people who exit relationships and painting them in the negative including how they end up in divorce. I think that part contradicts the ultimate message and can keep people stuck in unhealthy and or narcissistic relationships. There’re times when leaving is the safe thing to do and we can’t paint everyone who leaves with a broad brush. I know that isn’t the intent of the show and differentiating for those who need to leave would have been helpful. You are a blessing to all of us. You’re saving lives. “To the world a narcissist looks human but to you they’re an animal“. Narcissists break you down from the inside out and are skilled in covering up their acts. People get stuck because the narc looks innocent and has already set you up so others believe them and not your story. Emotional abuse is silent evil - only you know what’s happening to you. Keep preaching this crucial message. Narcism is real and it’s not easy to spot especially the covert narcissist until you’re knee deep in shark infested water.

I thank God I left a narccisist for good.It is the best decision I have made of late in my life.Thankyou Jesus!

This guy has got so much wisdom am learning alot

Love how Benjamin explains every point into details, I need help in all angles

Guys, there are a lot of resources on KZfaq, about narcissists and how to leave them. Mandugu na madada, erevukeni!

Am glad and thankful for his advice! He is gifted to change people's mind!! Full of wisdom! Looking forward to see him when I pay a visit back home! Greet job!👏

Self respect is your only defence against abuse...👌🏾👍🏽

You are really revealing alot about some things I never understood about myself.

Been there. Done that. Bought a tshirt 😀 Experience is a ruthless teacher. Thank God for this show!

"Their only way of resolve is exist", You guys just described my exhusband, wow!

Wow he speaks the reality thx switch tv proud ugandan following every bit😍😍😍😍

Daughters of narcissistic mothers is very real! Great topic of discussion.

I love the energy of this Psychologist..And mastery of content.

I've been a fan of this psychologist since I first saw him on K24...great content

Proud to be here, I am learning a lot Zulu and Joyce God bless 🙏 Love from South Sudan 🇸🇸❤️

Every time i see this guy nakaanga na thermos ya chai glued.😍

I understand the lady who cannot leave. I left 10 times before I left and I felt very stuck, but I finally left after 3 yrs.

Its good to have gone trough this episode. I would have not known why i have suffered all this time

I needed this guys❤thanks

Watching from SA, I've been binge watching the different episodes. This man is informed and doesn't hold back. Thank you Benjamin Zulu

Thanks Benjamin and Joyce for the show 😘 😘 😘 😘

I was dating one and l can honestly tell you that Jesus is the one who delivered me, l swear.

My confidence and peace of mind is important.

Oooh wow. Such an informative content. I like .now I know what I have been dealing with💔

Narcissist can't marry as if they have a spirit spouse, u can't trust them.

This is so helpful.Thank you

I've been self healing for 5yrs now the damage was intense, I was in a 9yrs marriage, my ex husband couldn't allow me to work or finish my studies.he cheated on with countless women and he would be beat me up until I was unconscious and I was allowed to have friends. He got kids with someone else while we were still married. I have not lived in my 20s ,I've been psychologically damaged and I've not dated since.you have confirmed everything I've experienced in my life. I need therapy asap

It’s amazing how I get answers here everytime

Waw, I love his wisdomi will always listen to his interviews

I was in a long distance relationship with a Nigerian man for one year.if you have never experienced the silent treatment,you will never truly understand what someone goes through.he destroyed my self esteem,something died inside me,good news I will never fall for the trap of another one.

Please guys talk about tribal marriage... What to do when parents are against it.. #loving the show..

Aw thank you so much dear brother. This is a big unexpected problem may God help us

This is really good. Thank you sir.

I have learned something. Thanks

I’m married situation not even a dating situation. But this real. Thanks!

He just described me. What he said about being raised by a narcissist is exactly me and to make it worse im an Empath....He described me kabisa.

I know this guy. He'd preach in our school.... Muthale girls... He is so blessed 🤗🤗

I love this man!

Its painful that all my life I keep attracting people with that personality. They take take take, give silent treatment instead of solving issues, lying cheating manipulation gaslighting. I fear getting in a relationship now coz I don't want to be hurt again

Dealing with such walked away however you keep feeling damaged but I strongly believe it's the best decision choose to hurt n leave peacefully long term or stay n keep hurting 😵🤕😢walk away

True talk kabisa I'm learning something thanks so much

I LOVE IT,GOOD ADVISE INDEED FROM THIS COACH

Breaking up to a narssist is not easy..you must be ready for a fight..cut all communications with them

I have watched most of this Kenyan TV relationship and marriage counselors. This guy Zulu is the only that makes sense, his views are practical. I never knew him until one video popped and was glued, next thing is I binge watched and downloaded all videos he has appeared in. I love how Joyce knows how to engange him.(You need to watch him in different panels to understand) Good job you two! ( the ones behind the camera too)

Kanyaga kubwa, kubwa... Great topic!

solid wisdom. Kindly have the guy on the show often

My neighbor back then.proud of you mutemi

When a narc meets a narc, girl, you would just love to grab some popcorns and watch them tearing each other up

Someone else suggested below and I agree this guy needs his own show. There is so much material that is left unexhausted because of time constraints I guess with the Joyce show.

Everythg Alex is explaining is right....unfortunately among Africans it is easily mistaken "to be luv "🤬.....met a guy that our relationship was according to his conditions....even in the bedroom...he wanted to control when to come and how i shld participate during intercourse....he only cared abt himself....had mood swings....wld behave like a stranger the nxt hr.....the guy was basically mean from 1- 100. One day i just told him....i cldn't be his galfriend anymore coz i hve failed to satisfy him in all ways ( I intentionally put the blame on me to achieve peace and freedom as long as he leaves me alone)....he celebrated i guess by salting more blame on me.....in 2wks time...reality hit him and he realised he had indirectly got dumped by me....my nightmare started again...he was very manipulative in his behaviour and sayings......e.g that he luved me, he can't chuck me bla bla bla👎....but I stod by my words....he is still hunting me up to now....despite the fact that he gets the same answer a million times in 1yr🤷‍♀️....WE R NOT GOOD FOR EACHOTHER( messaging) ....I never pick up his calls....and am sure he is pulling his hair like crazy for that BUT this is the right dose of medicine to pple with NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER!👈 Jimmy am glad u hve come to our rescue.💐...this is smthg we Africans r un-aware of and must be taught ONCE AND FOR ALL!👌 # AM HAPPY I CAN BREATH!😅☔

We have some here already... "Those who have disliked👀"

Much love from Uganda

It is indeed time we had these conversations and promote healthy relationships.😊

I have learnt a lot... thanks

I really appreciate you. From Tz

I dated one who was so manupilative and arrogant in most of his responses.

wish you could more talks on narcissists. well done

Almighty God you see me through this all thank you lord to bring me out of this 🙏🙏

Wish I saw this earlier I have been with someone who will go silent on me and ask for a break every time we will have an issue and very many red flags that I ignored.. By God's grace am still healing from that one toxic narcissistic relationship.. Thank you Joyce and Mr.Zulu for this discussion

Joyce you are so beautiful my sister. Great show. Primmy from Botswana 🇧🇼 watching from Namibia 🇳🇦

This as much as i would agree with some of the points i also think someone needs to look at it objectively. Sometimes for example for me..... my partner gets super pissed n she throws words around n calls me really mean names. I always wonder what her expectations of me is at such times other than keeping quiet. I don't think such scenarios should be considered as narcissist. Coz when u go back n forth is just making the situation bad n for me i say hell no to emotional escalation.

Thanks, very informative.

It's like you are talking about my current life Mr Zulu. I'm tired of this "space and breaks".

He should definitely get his own KZfaq channel

Wow I love this show

Wueh!!! Just listening to this conversation, I have a thousand reasons to thank God..... Life with a narcissist...

So much knowledge ❤️

Wah wah...my Goodness...

So timely

I appreciate my parents 😍😍...our upbringing was 👌 liberal not forced things .

Beautiful topic, leaving narcissistic people is a fight, you must stay put even after you divorce them coz they still desire to manipulate and steal your joy. Just don’t put up with that kind of nonsense. Walk out and move on...pap.

That's very true

Saudi madams true definition of necessist.

Why do I have a feeling that being a Narcissistic is more like a demon or a spirit that user's this people to hurd them and others?because someone commented that being delivered in God's house saved her from a Narcissistic ex. This is more like possessed people!

I wish there was more insight to narcissistic mothers in the "black" or "African" community (speaking from uk). Its something that is never truly discussed, but the effects & damage are almost permanent

i was married to a narcissist, he worked so hard to ruin my self esteem . by Gods grace i was doing my undergraduate in counseling psychology so i had coping mechanisms, he made a mistake ya kunifukuza kwake. nilienda he tried reconciliation but i was done. self love my priority

I think I'll be the easiest victim of narcissism 🙈

I am an empath ,I dated a narcissist 4 years ago....my self esteem has never been the same again

Wow this guy , l could listen to him all day . I like that he calls a spade a spade

My stepmother is the narcissist in my family. She wants to control everything and everybody. We can't call our father directly otherwise it's a lack of respect and love towards her. She threatened my father with a knife because she found out he had a mistress. She is always making up stories creating problems between our father and me n my siblings. , and if we do not apologize, although we didn't do anything, my father will also refuse to talk to us. Its like she is possessed or something. As of now, the relationship between us and our father is non existimng, which is really sad. Hmm God help us!🙏

Wow. I am good after this. I am that impact asyou call it. I like it coz am out of this now

Where were you all my life 😭😭. I needed this in 2017. Three years later I'm only realizing what I've been going through.

Narcissists are insecure but wont admit it

When I was young my sister use to say the man that will marry me need to come for advice before marring me,reasons be I have answers to every question,am a grown up now and my friends have known me for being a person you can't win over,do I have problem or what,

Am dating a guy who is currently a moms boy. He's so stressing

Thanks

No.silent l start strong l get this Program hard one

"Emotional narcissists ...." I have seen it all **

Basically he is talking about my mother .... The golden child . the black sheep .the empath .narcasistic rage . the codependant . sigh ....

Heeeh you talking to me Aki my self esteem was really messed up