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Home Before Dark - Love, Marriage & Betrayal
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Күн бұрынWhen my husband cheated on me and left. I tell this story in the context of watching and reviewing the movie, HOME BEFORE DARK. I am 64 and share my life. I talk about how sometimes loving " too much" can become an obsession, where we lose ourselves to please the object of our affection. " I am nothing without him"...one of the first warning signs that you are losing your own identity, giving in to the pressure of turning into the person they want you to be. I share intimate details of the life I shared with my first husband John in hopes it might help others.
The actor seen in the movie is again Austin...I think he did a wonderful job playing the part of a man so desperately in love. He is so much fun to work with and helps me bring to life the movie I pick to review. I am not allowed to use movie clips so I try to reenact the vibe and sentiment of the scenes in the movie.
Carla's Channel - • I've Got No Place to G...
I've Got No Place to Go | Desperate for a Man
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and the rest fo the story of what happened to my ex-husband and Kathy :)
John lived with Kathy for a year.....she left him because he didn't make enough money....he felt terrible for years for what he did...he wrote me letters saying how sorry he was for 30 some years....he never remarried after me and he never had another child.He moved to Nashville 15 years ago away from our son and grandchildren...although he does visit them for 2 week once a year.
Thank you so much for your love and prayers for Bill. Thank you also for all the love you put into lifting those who come here to this channel. I can't tell you how grateful I am to be able to upload a video every week and then hear your responses and know about your lives.
Much love always and always from me and Desi,
Susan xxoo
The Movie!!!!
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@SRAshley100 4 жыл бұрын
I married my high school sweetheart at 16. One year and 1 month later we had our first daughter, 4 months later I found out I was pregnant with my 2nd daughter. He joined the army and while at basic training fell in love with another girl. He left me for this girl. All of my hopes and dreams were shattered. All of my self esteem was shattered. I remembered while pregnant with the first daughter he wanted a boy. Somehow, in my youth and naïveté I had it in my head if I just have a boy this time he will come back. I loved this man so much I practically worshipped him. I would cry myself to sleep each night, holding my pregnant stomach. Instead of me patting my little girl , that was sleeping beside me to sleep, it was my little girl patting her mommy that was crying. I look back at those times and I see what loving someone so much can do to you. It took me years and a lot of wrong choices to learn to find myself and learn to love me, but I did! As you were telling your story, I felt that pain again. It is a memory of a girl that was on top of the world and became Humpty Dumpty and thought she couldn’t put herself back together again. It took a lot of counseling for me to find myself again...sometimes you have to reach out and get help. Don’t be ashamed to reach out. Because inside you are dying and crying out to God for help. He expects us to help ourselves too! That girl is gone and a new woman arose out of her ashes. It took prayer, counseling and determination.
@laurahelene9118 4 жыл бұрын
Wow! I feel your pain. I understand fully in my soul. God bless and you make me proud to be a woman. We are so strong...we can and do overcome. It just takes time to understand that truth and then to heal. ❤
@LittlePoet 4 жыл бұрын
I felt every word you wrote Sheila....you have just given me such a gift in sharing your painful journey...oh dear....alone and pregnant.....for a woman, there are no words to describe our pain. But we go on....that is what women do. I swear, we are the strongest creatures on earth. My love to you and your children....thank you so for being here...xxoo Susan
@lauralee3218 4 жыл бұрын
Sheila Ashley Your amazing😥 God bless you and your children always and may all the blessings flow to you! So strong such courage and strength!❤️
@lauralee3218 4 жыл бұрын
LittlePoet the two of you went through such a sad time! Breaks my ❤️ heart! What I see now are 2 gorgeous women with such strength and courage! God had to have a hand on you both in helping you through the tough times! God bless you both always 😘😘
@AKAMom-dc7gc 4 жыл бұрын
Been there. Lost all self esteem. Never saw it coming. We were just shy of 23 yr anniversary. I thought of myself as Ms. Humpty Dumpty. So glad that you found happiness.
@alwaysavailable2papa 4 жыл бұрын
The best advice my Grandma gave me over 50 years ago was...Always fall in Love with a man that loves YOU a little bit more. I followed her advice after several highschool and college mishaps. I've now been married to my Love for 40 amazing years. I've also passed along Grandma's advice to my daughter.
@theflossi56 4 жыл бұрын
Debbie Perkins that’s interesting advice and in my case true
@kaylasheppard7746 4 жыл бұрын
My grandmother told me: the first time, marry for love. The second time, marry for money lol
@kaylasheppard7746 4 жыл бұрын
Also, how do you know if he loves you a little bit more? Sometimes it's hard to tell
@monicacappetta7017 4 жыл бұрын
I was told the same by my mother. I believe it works.
@msr1116 4 жыл бұрын
I've seen this twice. Both times the women knew their power and took full advantage, sad to say. One of the two was in an alleged open marriage but did nothing but lie, manipulate and use her sexuality to gets gifts and money from her side guy. I often thought she and her husband were just a con team. The other used her adult children as her partners in crime to dupe her overtrusting bf. He's so hooked in at this point he couldn't leave her for anything. I feel bad for the good guys of the world done in by bad women.
@mattiesful 4 жыл бұрын
These stories are like a nightmare! I’m married to my husband for 48 yrs next month. We had some ups and downs early on, even a year long separation. But our love was very strong and helped us keep our marriage. We have been thru the 12 yr long drug addiction of our youngest son and his death when he was 36 yrs, 4 yrs later I had breast cancer. He is my rock and I thank God for him every day. I’m a very fortunate woman. I wish everyone could have this level of love and commitment ❤️
@user-ex3mx7hk4l 11 ай бұрын
I’m sorry for your loss, Mattie. 💕
@judybw706 5 күн бұрын
You are so fortunate you married a good man.
@cherylcoyote 4 жыл бұрын
Incidentally, my first husband left me with a 2 year old, six months pregnant with my second child. It was horrifying, for sure, but in retrospect I realize that I never felt as if there was something wrong with me. My only mistake was to choose the wrong man to marry and be the father of my children. I credit my parents, especially my mother, for loving me so completely. Their love wove a core of strength in me that couldn't be broken by anyone. Thanks Mom and Dad!
@LittlePoet 4 жыл бұрын
I see that you in Cheryl.....that is one of the reasons you are so compelling on film...your confidence and intelligence....and you have this joy within you. You brighten my world and you make me think...and you remind me to keep it as real as I can....I just adore you beyond words...I owe you a shoutout or two also! xxoo Happy weekends! Sues & Dez
@cherylcoyote 4 жыл бұрын
LittlePoet Awww, back atcha Sweetheart! ❤️
@jamilgotcher5456 2 жыл бұрын
Cheryl, my divorce was when my daughter was 6 years old and I couldn't agree with you more about having loving parents that gave me strength and had my back when my life fell apart. I've paid my parents back with taking care of them for the last 15 years. I've been honored to take care of them and I've been very blessed as a result.
@laurarammage979 11 ай бұрын
❤
@cherylcoyote 11 ай бұрын
@@jamilgotcher5456 My father died relatively suddenly after a short illness, but I had the honor of taking care of my mother through her two-year battle with cancer. I was with her in the doctor's office when she got the diagnosis and I was with her as she passed, with my lips to her ear and my fingers on her pulse as her heart beat its last. I whispered that everything would be okay, that I would make things as easy as I could for my brother and sister, and asked her to save a seat on the bench for me next to her and Dad. During those last few minutes I pulled up her favorite hymn, 'Oh, Come, Angel Band', on KZfaq and put my phone on the pillow near her ear. The hymn played softly as I said my goodbyes, and just as the last note died away her heart stopped beating. My mother told me more than once how the moment I was born was the most perfect, painfully glorious experience of her life and it changed everything. Being with her at the end was the same for me. She was with me when I took my first breath and I was with her when she took her last. I look back on those two brief years of caring for her and there is so much I would change, if I could. I'd ask more questions about her life and family and I'd write everything down. I'd spend every possible moment with her, knowng that our time was so short. I would thank her daily for her love, support, and sacrifice raising me through childhood and, truth be told, through my entire adult life. It was with my mother's death that I stopped fearing it because, if there is an afterlife, my parents are waiting for me.
@derinyoung9388 4 жыл бұрын
Susan, I just want to say a big thank you to you. Watching you has helped me so, sooo much. My husband left me September 6th 2018 after being together for over 40 years. I have 5 grown boys with him, I married him at the age of 17 years old. I got home from work one evening and he was gone. I am up and down emotionally but you have helped me more than you know. Thank you so much from the U.K.
@carenlook7902 2 жыл бұрын
Wow that is so recent. What a wicked man. You deserve better and you will get throught it.
@kasko8550 4 ай бұрын
God bless you and your family abundantly!
@josiedickson6959 2 ай бұрын
I hope yoou life is so much lovelier now .. many many hugs
@Ann4U2000 4 жыл бұрын
I think most of us have been through something in our love lives that hurt . At 18 I fell in love with a musician . He was prettier than me, and a year of being with him I learned he cheated regularly at his gigs during band breaks. I excused that because I loved him more than I loved myself. Then he left me for my best friend at the time. It took a good 2 years to heal. But I met the man I am still with and raised a family with and we are nearing 44 years together. It's been a better kind of love. A solid, secure love. Never fearing cheating, always knowing we had each others back no matter what.Good times and not so good times. I consider myself one of the lucky ones. The best was saved for last.
@adamisaac4685 4 жыл бұрын
FYI, not all musicians are bad guys.😉
@Mexicobeanpole 4 жыл бұрын
I find it hard to believe that he was prettier than you.
@Ann4U2000 4 жыл бұрын
@@adamisaac4685 Sorry if that came off that way...My life partner that I met after my heartbreak also is a musician, just not professionally...but he was in a band when I first met him.
@Ann4U2000 4 жыл бұрын
@@Mexicobeanpole LOl...thanks..the man was drop dead gorgeous...and women couldn't stay away from him, even when they knew he was with me. I once in a blue moon wonder what he looks like now. I like to picture him fat, bald and humbled a tad ( he had such an ego!)
@hairdresser1300 4 жыл бұрын
@@Ann4U2000 I'm surprised your curiosity hasn't had you google. My story is very similar to yours. I found that my ex is bald(he ADORED his long hair) and is at this moment is in trouble with indictments.They did us a favor by cheating. A major character flaw revealed
@MyAndreia70 3 жыл бұрын
I got married when I was almost 38 years ( I was single until then). I graduated, college, worked 15 years on my field, travel, enjoyed my friends and my life, dated and went to live in Australia for 1 year so I could learn some English ( I am from Brazil but I live now in US ) and experience another culture. I believe that getting married older had a big impact the way I approach a relationship, more down to earth and we both were more mature and knew what to expect. No "high school sweethearts" type of thing when nobody is really mature for a marriage. I believe that the culture of "Romantic blind love" cause a lot of problems.
@Choclatcotton Жыл бұрын
Your absolutely right I was older as well and so glad I didn’t marry in high school or college
@theresavandendriesche7673 4 жыл бұрын
Great video! I married my high school sweetheart. We had three children and 25 years later he left me for someone else. I tried to become the person I thought he wanted but lost myself while doing so. Twenty years later, I still wonder how that could have happened but I love myself more now than I did while trying to be someone else!!
@jorgieg1 4 жыл бұрын
Very thought provoking video. I never forgot what Barbra Streisand said.... “Growing older I’ve realized we CAN survive life’s disappointments... and that we CANNOT look to someone else for our happiness” I agree with her words. It’s not easy being a woman and living through an entire lifetime, it’s not easy.
@pinkfrosting1950 4 жыл бұрын
I was married and had a baby boy at 19, to a “boy” who didn’t love me and made no secret about cheating on me. I moved on and he remained the loser that everyone but me always knew he was. This was such a wonderful heartfelt video. I will have to watch that movie.
@dinahsoar6982 3 жыл бұрын
A friend told me years ago " a woman writes her own price tag". If/when we write it too low b/c we want a man so badly, we are cheating ourselves and he will too in time.
@patticakesintexas 2 жыл бұрын
Great quote
@danilaroche1156 6 ай бұрын
I LOVE this. Pure gold!
@janjbowman 4 жыл бұрын
I am crazy in love with my LORD JESUS CHRIST and he won’t ever break my heart .
@mishonwhite7607 4 жыл бұрын
Amen 🙏
@janmcdonald8108 4 жыл бұрын
Amen He will never leave or forsake us~ ♥️
@ishaprasad8789 3 жыл бұрын
Amen sister 🙏✝️❤️
@lisakrushinski9436 3 жыл бұрын
Me, too! ❤️✝️
@chefevilee9566 3 жыл бұрын
Me too! 🙏
@Mary-Mercedes 4 жыл бұрын
I honestly don't know a single woman who hasn't been cheated on at some point. Men cheat because there are ALWAYS selfish (married or single) women willing to cheat with them. These women never consider the pain they inflict... and the families they destroy... and the children left fatherless. Susan, This is one of your most powerful and profound videos. Because it is not only artistic -- it's raw and honest. Beautiful. Austin is dashingly handsome and priceless here too. Loved the last few seconds!
@number1grandma1 7 ай бұрын
Yes, there’s always another woman willing to destroy another woman’s life.
@Veemerica 4 жыл бұрын
15 years ago I fell in love with a man. He fell in love with me, or so I thought. People said we would light up the room when we entered together, the sparks were flying around us. I had been diagnosed with MS two years earlier but I was doing fine and had no handicaps but I wasn't working. I would spend the day making sure my home was clean, organised and welcoming and I would cook elaborate meals for when he came home from the office. We didn't officially live together but he would be at my place the majority of the time. But after 6 months he started to withdraw and he finally said he didn't want me, he didn't want MS in his life. That hurt me so deep. I felt so broken. I think that is the reason I still don't date. I don't want to be told I am broken again.
@karenreiter533 4 жыл бұрын
Oh my dear, I am so sorry. I am praying for you. Please take care of yourself. I always think that I am an example of strength for others. I have a debilitating disorder as well. It’s so hard I know when you have been so hurt. Bless you. ❤️❤️❤️
@a.lauber2019 4 жыл бұрын
I truly believe, We must first LOVE ourselves, LOVE our own company, and always remember to HAVE a special Passion "hobby" to love to engage yourself. After 3 marriages, 2 divorces and one tragic death .... I had learned at a very young age that I am very special and that I will not allow myself to be emotionally, Physically, or psychologically abused by "a man" who cannot love nor appreciate my beauty, my loving nature, my talents ...etc. I, must admit, walking away from a unhealthy, unhappy, unloving relationship is Great Therapy and it was for me ... But, dusting yourself off, keeping your head high, shutting the door on that "experience "..... FREEING YOURSELF UP FOR A WONDERFUL relationship is the best gift to yourself.......Be strong, take a Deep breath .... And goodness and Love will find its way to you💕🙏🏻
@gloriasaliba3395 Жыл бұрын
I’m sorry - life can be so unfair
@danilaroche1156 6 ай бұрын
You gave him wife benefits when you weren't married.
@danilaroche1156 6 ай бұрын
People need to learn from their mistakes. I wasn't blaming her. I lived with a man and was upset he wouldn't marry me. I had to take responsibility for my part. Marriage is very important. Very. Thanks for replying!
@donnastephenson3865 4 жыл бұрын
The young man was so sad. Every generation must go through this hurt. I wish we would learn. It took me until 55 and a major health crisis to not care what people think or if they love me. It is a real sense of laying your burden down. A lightning of life. A good feeling and peacefulness. Thank you Susan. Hugs Donna 🌻
@michellem9275 4 жыл бұрын
It's the little things in life that matter to me...a snore free household...ahhhhhh heaven!💖😇💤
@kathleenritchie8216 3 жыл бұрын
Haha so true! My ex was the loudest!
@janetsalter9606 2 жыл бұрын
Lol!!!
@nana73carol46 2 жыл бұрын
I would love to hear my husband of 51 years snoring beside me again! 5 years a widow.
@sheryltisdale 4 жыл бұрын
I got married the first time at 16 had my first child at 17 second at 21 , husband was extremely abusive , left at 24 had to run hide. I have done all the things you mentioned and probably more trying to get someone to love me when I was younger. A light bulb went on in my head one day in my 40's and realized the only person I have to please is me. Love this video, thank you Susan!
@beckyallen9742 3 жыл бұрын
I have had chapter upon chapter of losses. What I choose to do is to sweep them aside. Be positive. Don't rehash what has happened. Because the good news is there is (hopefully) a tomorrow. A new opportunity. A new day. A place to reinvent yourself and go forward. Don't go back and revisit the negative if you can avoid. It does not mean do not process the learning from the experience; today don't spend time on it and go make a new experience in your life....and you are helping me today (1/16/2021) to go forward and make a new day. You are providing support which perhaps you didn't realize you could/would -- but it does. Today's a better day because of you. GO FORWARD EVERYONE. :) WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER. PLEASE DON'T STAY STUCK.
@sharonstrickland6421 4 жыл бұрын
One of my best friends is going through something in this vein. After 50 years, yes 50, of marriage her husband tells her he doesn't want to do it anymore. She has spent her life being the perfect wife and mother. Probably lost herself totally in the years of always putting him first. She's coming back though.
@aujkalenic4203 3 жыл бұрын
My husband did the very same thing ! We've been married for 43 yrs at the time, and he took a fit, packed a suitcase and left one day. He's a full blown alcoholic. Long story short, we reconciled and even as I write this I have to say " I wonder why?"
@christineterpens3136 2 жыл бұрын
Incredible that 50 years of love ,devotion and sacrifice was cast away. Glad to hear your friends picking herself up and enjoying life
@doloreslott7135 2 жыл бұрын
This also happened to my grandmother. Our family was shocked and mortified. Dear Lord this was my grandfather. Have some decency
@dsmith9709 2 жыл бұрын
@@doloreslott7135 Two sides to every story. What was his story. Some people just get burnt out from marriage. Everyone has to have their happiness. They have one life.
@doloreslott7135 2 жыл бұрын
Well my grandfather started sleeping with the lady that was brought into my grandmother's home to help her as she was very sick. Guess that was the other side of the story.
@susanfitzpatrick3369 4 жыл бұрын
Amazing!!! Now I need to find that movie and watch it.... I spent many years with a man that was 13 years older than me.... I thought he was so in love with me ..... only to find out that for the entire 20 years we were together he was cheating..... oh my heart ❤️ was so broken..... I threw him out and grieved for the loss.... I’m so very happily married to a wonderful, kind man now we have 2 boys and ..... life is good!!!!!❤️
@sharoncrawford3042 3 жыл бұрын
Good for you. No woman should stay with a cheating man. My mother did with my dad. Maybe thats why I have 0 tolerance for a cheater.
@DianaCampos-Rodriguez 4 жыл бұрын
Poet you have a beautiful heart. I was pregnant when my man left and got married when my baby was six months. I went on to marry a wonderful man and have been with him for 25 years and that was the best thing that ever happened in my life. So life goes on but one never forgets.
@melissaadams6776 4 жыл бұрын
I remember my first love..... Killed me for him to move on ..... Broke me In some respects ..... i dont believe i fully recovered from the loss
@sharoncrawford3042 3 жыл бұрын
Each time, it takes a little piece of your heart. Had mine broken more then once. Im 64 and Ive been married over 40 yrs. But had some bumps in the beginning. The only thing that saved our marriage was that we both became born again christians, If not we wouldnt be together right now.
@brendaaugustine4925 4 жыл бұрын
I was very saddened by the young man trying to please his lady friend. I thought of all the things I would have told him, which in my mind would have given him clear vision- but then I caught myself and reminded myself that these lessons can only be learned on one's own, sadly.
@marilynpeppers1356 4 жыл бұрын
You are so right!
@goodwillbunny5773 4 жыл бұрын
Best advice ever! I was married for 30 years and then alone again for 20. Last year, I remarried and we are going to live happily ever after! We are in our 70s now and life is good. Thank you for this video...from Grandma Bunny--not the dumbest blonde in Phoenix!
@lovearttherapyalways 2 жыл бұрын
Thanks so much for this. This speaks to me very much at this time in my life. I have been through quite a painful ordeal in the past decade concerning toxic relationships, a divorce, finding my way surviving to start again alone. Alone, very much alone.... aside from God who never leaves us nor forsakes us. But in this world I have come to choose alone over toxic relationships, alone over crumbs, alone over being untrue to myself. I have done a major clean up in my life as I realized I was surrounded by people who truly cared nothing for my soul. People who trampeled upon my heart and blamed me for my hurt feelings, etc.... Now finally older, alone and true to myself. I spend days doing things I truly enjoy, alone. Honestly I much rather be alone than with hurtful, disrespectful people. I watched the movie on you tube which you spoke of and I really enjoyed it... it spoke to me very much... life is funny.... sometimes it leads you on a path back to yourself... finding oneself that we lost is truly an amazing experience. Thanks again and my God richly bless you and cute little adorable Desy! :)
@angelagregory5312 4 жыл бұрын
Hello Susan, You have a beautiful soul. If only you, ruled the world. I always think of Princess Diana, she couldn't get Price Charles, to love her, he married Diana but loved Camilla. So very sad what people, do to us. 😘😘💐💐🇬🇧🇺🇸
@StephanieJoRountree 4 жыл бұрын
We all want to be loved, and when we were young we may have done things we thought would attract someone we loved, but now that we're older, we realize the importance of being ourselves.
@LittlePoet 4 жыл бұрын
I think you are so right....when we were young the world was magic to me...one day felt like a year...I had my whole life ahead of me and I remember that feeling...like we could fly!!!
@StephanieJoRountree 4 жыл бұрын
@@LittlePoet Remember flying in your dreams as a child? I still do that!
@LittlePoet 4 жыл бұрын
@@StephanieJoRountree I do!!! I still love that! I used to have dreams where I was driving too...mostly off a cliff!!!
@annetterogers5769 4 жыл бұрын
I did the same as you with my first love . He had outgrown me and I did not want to let go . I did everything possible to change myself to what I thought he wanted . Of course it didn't work but it took me a long time to get over it . Today I still think of him and what my life would have been like if I had gone on to marry and grow old with him. I know now decades later that it was the starting point for my self esteem to blossom . I never lost myself again to a man . One of your best videos . Thank you so much .
@Lea2008-k8b 4 жыл бұрын
24 years of never being enough and a legal document wiped that life away. But, the life I have built after that time is far better and healthier then I could have ever imagined. I have the most wonderful husband now and I am blessed more than I deserve, I mourn for the 24 years that I can never get back.
@mchris65 4 жыл бұрын
you are lucky to be happily married now! it was 20 yrs for me but alone.
@Lea2008-k8b 4 жыл бұрын
mchris65 , this was God, there is no way I would have met my husband if God had not orchestrated it. To be honest, it has taken numerous years to get to this point. I’ve had to heal and forgive and forgive all over again, it took years of therapy to even begin to trust people, it took years for me to begin to trust myself. Even now after all this time, and even though I have the most incredible husband, I still mourn those years that is lost and in some ways was stolen. My hope and my prayer for those women walking through this, and what I would say to them and to you. Be gentle with yourself, it’s okay to cry, it’s okay to be angry, it’s okay to be sad. Journal, journal, journal and express your feelings get it out. And remember, you are beautifully and wonderfully made, you are strong, you are smart, and you are brave, do not ever believe anything different. And remember nothing is impossible especially when you have God on your side. You have the power to make a good life for yourself. If your spouse cheated, that speaks of their character not yours.
@ravennam4833 2 жыл бұрын
You should not mourn those years, they brought you to where you are now. They were the foundation stones on which you built your current happiness.
@Jkaye13 4 ай бұрын
@@ravennam4833 While that is true.. we mourn that the years we were unhappy, living with no joy, are years that are gone that we don't get back again.. and we know time is short.. and precious 💗💗
@karenschuppner466 4 жыл бұрын
My heart broke for you, Susan. Let's just say he lost out BIG TIME! I was just thinking to myself how absolutely beautiful you look in this video. I'm gonna say it again...if I can look that amazing at your age I'd radiate joy and confidence too. Gotta watch that movie!!!
@dorcasgilbert1575 4 жыл бұрын
I was with a guy for 5 yrs & was not married. I was so in love with him & & would do anything to keep his love. However he was abusive in every way. It was awful. I finally left him after 5 yrs. I can’t believe I let someone treat me so badly, but I have the most wonderful husband who adores & loves me for myself. Pls if somebody is doing this to you & you think that’s just life, it’s not okay!
@sharoncrawford3042 3 жыл бұрын
One thing I could never do, is let a man abuse me. I cant stand the cheating either, because my dad always cheated on my mom. I hate that cheating crap. I could not stay with a man that could do that to me.
@Judy122550 3 жыл бұрын
Dorcas Gilbert I am so happy for you !
@joy107961 Жыл бұрын
I just wanted to say that I'm so happy I found your channel today. The comments of the younger man at the end of the video totally resonated with me. After 10 years of loving someone unconditionally, I found out that he never truly loved me back...so he walked away without ever talking to me about it first. Losing someone that way was one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with. I still love him, and a part of me probably always will...but I had to learn to love myself more and to know that I'm deserving of receiving the same kind of love back.
@LittlePoet Жыл бұрын
Hello Joy and welcome! I am so happy you found me!!!
@laurahelene9118 4 жыл бұрын
Oh my Goodness yes! My husband left me and took our girls to another state. Long story short I loved him so much and I did feel like nothing. I was in a bad way at the time. No one close to me was around anymore. He was it. I just died inside. I had a nervous breakdown. It was awful. I had always been a strong person but I lost myself 100%. IWe did reconcile. But no longer do I allow him to wield such power over me. Never again. Btw your husband...his tremendous loss. Not yours dear sweet articulate talented and loving Susan. I think it is tragic when people dishonor each other as well as their marriage vows. Truly when they do so they are dishonoring themselves. Goodnight Susan and Desi. Sweet dreams. ❤❤❤
@mchris65 4 жыл бұрын
he had no right to take your children out of state!
@sandrakelbaugh1681 4 жыл бұрын
I've gone through the same thing in my 1st AND 2nd marriage. I think women are desperate for love and most of us have these desperate tendencies. ....it takes so much work to make yourself realize that we are SO much more than a man's partner. That we ARE worthy of a true and pure and selfless love from our partner.....great video. We need more of this topic on utube. Thank you for sharing....
@judyt.5702 4 жыл бұрын
First husband told me he didn't love me anymore. I called my mother.She came and picked me up.I lived with her for a year. My husband eventually came back. The second time he cheated I left for good. When my son died I think it sent him over the edge. Three years later I had a child a son. He watched my son and I with such regret. After that I remarried. But although I loved my second husband it was never the same. I wasn't in love with him. He left.I wasn't as upset as I should have been. I just didn't love him like I should have.My first husband never remarried or had another child.But you live and learn.
@blueseptember2174 Жыл бұрын
I'm so sorry for your loss. Did your first husband ever change his lustful lifestyle after losing you? I always wish first couples could get back together but I know sometimes it cannot be. I'm in a similar position myself.
@ladyofwildrose 4 жыл бұрын
Yes, I was once Charlotte too. Making bargains with my husband, "I can be more this, or I could be more that, when indeed there were so many other men who wanted to be with me, but I wanted the love of the one who did not want me; my husband. " Like you, I will never become someone else. I love and accept me just as I am. Thank you for sharing your story.
@Rbshow1000 4 жыл бұрын
WOW, you describe a movie like no one else. You have been through the 'mill' but your attitude and strength now, surpass it all. Hugs, Senior diva
@MonikaBeautyandLifestyle 4 жыл бұрын
Oh Susan i could feel your pain in your words. My mother always told to be sure the man I loved actually loved me more. When I was young I didn't understand what she really meant but over time I saw it as holding something of yourself back. To retain a balance of sorts. My mom is a strong woman, I am much weaker but I never forgot her words and I am glad she said them to me. I did learn from them...more than I realized. Hugs!
@LittlePoet 4 жыл бұрын
You are so sweet Monika....I am always so happy to see your face and read your words...I hope we get to meet...
@nancyciampa3485 4 жыл бұрын
I too married my high school sweetheart. We had a baby and he changed, for the next 20 years I never felt that he loved us or me. We finally divorced and I vowed never to change who I am for anyone. It wasn't me who wasn't lovable, it was him, who was never happy and in need of rescuing.
@ravenraven966 3 жыл бұрын
Nancy ciampa, I think you are my cousin. At least you have the same name. I'm Carolyn
@nancyciampa3485 3 жыл бұрын
@@ravenraven966 Cousins? Which part of Italy is your family from?
@ravenraven966 3 жыл бұрын
@@nancyciampa3485 , I don't know what part of Italy the ciampa family is from. My aunt married into the ciampa family. My aunt Madeline married Richard ciampa.
@nancyciampa3485 3 жыл бұрын
@@ravenraven966 my family is from Rome and Sorento. most likely we are related. if you've been to the Boston area you'll find ciampa is huge!
@deborahjean7576 4 жыл бұрын
I never pleased my first husband no matter what I did we had a wonderful daughter out of this relationship which I am so proud of. Everything was about him. after 6 years I decided to get out the metal abuse was just not worth it . A very good decision. he was never happy even after remarrying . So I moved on and never looked back it was hard but it would have been harder to stay.
@karent3004 4 жыл бұрын
Susan, another wonderful, heart grabbing story. As I read through the comments, I can relate to you and so many others.... sometimes the older we are, it seems we've had just that much more time to do ridiculous things for love. We look back over the years and can't help but look at who we thought we loved and couldn't live without... it's heartbreaking. I just hope that all of us have somehow learned to love ourselves too...💗
@Deem1953 4 жыл бұрын
I fell in love for the first time when i was 40 years old. i used to think something was wrong with me because i never felt that passionate love -- until i met Michael. He was verbally abusive, and i thought it had to be my fault, so i walked on eggshells for 10 years, trying to be what he wanted of me. Then the physical abuse began, and i was so wrapped up with saving my marriage that i tolerated it. Then, he left me. i wasn't exciting enough. it has taken me over 10 years to finally get over him, and i knew i would never fall in love again. now, i am 66 years old, i am finally content with myself, i am happy with just being myself. i have my own little home. my beloved dog, Jill, who rescued me in the beginning, died two weeks ago. but, when i am ready, i plan to find an older rescue dog on death row, to shower my love on, so he will have the love i've craved all of my life. Thank you Susan, for being my friend.---- Dianne
@tracker1009 4 жыл бұрын
Deem1953 Your little rescue dog will have an amazing mummy to look after him , lots of love to you ❤
@caroled3924 4 жыл бұрын
So sorry about your little doggie. No one will take the place but another one deserves a chance for a wonderful home. Been there believe me. Lost my little Winnie dog my constant companion but took a chance on another n found soo much love. God bless you ❤️🤗🙏
@gina1784 4 жыл бұрын
I had my little dog too for 17 years, he was with me through both marriages. took two for me to learn my lesson. First cheated second took my soul . I changed my hair for him after he told me in not so kind words that I looked like a boy so I let it grow, when I highlited it he would tell me if it was the right color or not and so and so on. I loved him so much but nothing was ever good enough and I too walked on egg shells for 10 years. I lost my little dog this year but I think of him often and I too am healing and know that everything we go through makes us stronger and that there is a lesson in all that happens. I am loving me now and I may be alone forever but at 56 I am fine with that. I am better but I am forever changed and that is a good thing.
@susannovak8263 4 жыл бұрын
Deem1953 - i’m so sorry about your dear pet.
@Deem1953 4 жыл бұрын
@@susannovak8263 it has been heartbreaking, but i found a saying and i'm going to frame it. "Don't cry because it's over, SMILE because it happened." i now go for my walks and pretend Jill is trotting alongside me, and i talk to her as i walk.
@coastdaze748 2 жыл бұрын
You, LittlePoet, are one of the most real people I've watched on YT. Just found you the other day through your decorating of your apartment video (probably because I'm doing a bit of a revamp in my apartment). I have watched a few of your videos and like what you present. You're like the girlfriend I've always wanted, but never have had. Looking forward to those days or nights with a cup of cocoa, snuggled up in a comfy recliner and listening to your stories. P.S. My movie would be The Way We Were with Redford & Streisand. :-)
@bwote 4 жыл бұрын
My ex husband cheated regularly. He worked a lot out of town. He told me so after I left him (after 21 years) and that he had a son with another lady. We never had children. I had severe depression and I think he saw me as damaged. When I think of how much I loved this person and the time I spent trying to make him happy, it breaks me still. I am 57 and today...it still hurts. Seems everyone knew but me. Thank you for sharing your story. Sorry you had to go through what you did. I have watched your videos for over a year but never commented before. Much love to you and Desi!
@tracker1009 4 жыл бұрын
north7 I believe they seek us out, and then try to destroy us ..they see strength and kindness , something they haven't got so, it makes them feel powerful to take that away from us and leave our life empty, then they move on to their next victim ! Don't be sad as he was NEVER REAL ..he just saw you as an amazingly strong person and felt jealous of you ..be proud of yourself that you are 💁❤
@marclayton3537 4 жыл бұрын
Precious Beautiful Susan....my heart feels the deep pain you still carry...I too have been in this place & like You my heart is slowly healing....no matter what someone says if they have not felt Betrayal in their spirit soul & body then gladly they don’t know how we feel...when we have committed our very being to another person we give them a part of ourselves that we can never get back....But as time goes by we begin to open our eyes & see that we are Women of Great Value! Who have so Very Much to Offer to the Right Person WHO Will Value & Honour & Nurture Us... We Deserve Nothing Less Than That,,, So Susan I’m sending You Love Acceptance & Hugs ❤️🌹🌹🌹❣️
@debmarrett212 4 жыл бұрын
And that's why I love watching your videos! You stay true to yourself!
@Mel-59 3 жыл бұрын
I met my ex husband when we were 16. He left me for another woman 23 years later. I was devastated. Like you, I felt desperate to become like her. I was dark haired, she was blonde. He had a thing about blondes. My hairdresser point blank refused to colour my hair blonde. She knew what I was doing. How foolish of me. But I wanted him to love me like he loved her. My self esteem was on the floor. These days I love myself as I am. I am actually blonde now, but that's because I wanted to blend in my white roots. I did it for me. Never again would I change myself for someone else. x
@magdalenastevense1332 4 жыл бұрын
Dear, dear Susan, what an absolutely honest and moving video, it made me cry. So agree with you, we should never, ever change ourselves for a man. I did though and it will never happen again since I know I'm a better version of myself when I'm me. Have a great week and look forward to seeing you and Desi again next week.
@marciajones2361 3 жыл бұрын
You gave me chills!!! I saw this movie for the first time about 7 years ago and I too had a husband who had issues and he ended up leaving, after 20 years and 4 children. I absolutely loved this movie, I was able to record it when I had another cable company then lost it, I keep hoping TCM would show it again. I never knew anyone else who had seen this or really liked it , I would watch it over and over! You are a blessing to me , I found you by chance , you really inspired me to decorate my home to look more expensively. Also,to enjoy your singleness, as I have for 20 years now.
@ginastephens1546 4 жыл бұрын
I thought my high school boyfriend was so amazing! He was my first serious relationship and my first sexual relationship. He made me feel so inferior, he seemed so complex and above me. I couldn't understand why he ignored me and treated me the way he did. He broke up with me so many times, it was pure torture to my heart. Finally I moved on and then after a lifetime of years, I was newly divorced and so was he and we met up again. We started dating, and then as a mature woman I realized something. He was the same jerk as when we were young, only now I was confident enough in myself to realize it! He wasn't ever superior to me I was just to young and in love to realize it.
@hollyholstein6758 4 жыл бұрын
I love you but I always knew to be my own person, not to rely on anyone to take care of me. Lucky for me a wonderful man came into my life and gave me dreams I never even knew I had. I’m the luckiest woman in the world.
@janieromano8649 4 жыл бұрын
So sorry you had that experience of your husband cheating on you! You are a beautiful woman with so much love to give - I wonder if he realizes what he's lost!
@hairdresser1300 4 жыл бұрын
You'll want to read what Susan shared under the video
@ericanh5711 4 жыл бұрын
Genius!!! I absolutely love the re-enactments throughout the video. It took me a long, long time to accept myself for who I am and how I look...my lifestyle for the first 27 yrs of my marriage was very demanding & I always tried to convey that I was always put together in appearance with my style, our homes and our vehicles. It was incredibly exhausting and at times expensive and I got sick of it. I didn’t like me when I was trying to not be me!!!! So I stopped faking it, got real and I am so much more happier than I ever was. Some people don’t like me...I can be very opinionated, very confident and goofy...its quite a mix. And thats ok!!! I just have to be me!!!! Hugs 🤗
@christineterpens3136 2 жыл бұрын
Fantastic that you chose an authentic life and regained your self believe
@Trixstien 4 жыл бұрын
If you look this gorgeous and sexy at 64, you must have been a pure goddess in your 20s, so what sane man would cheat on you is beyond me.
@jessicanaan3284 4 жыл бұрын
It has nothing to do with looks. It's about what is 'missing' in the person who cheats.
@wildhorses6817 4 жыл бұрын
@@jessicanaan3284 Yes, exactly. The last woman my ex had an affair with was ugly, obese, really unattractive. He always told her how beautiful she was and how much he loved her. Married decades and I never heard that. I am happy alone now.
@sharoncrawford3042 3 жыл бұрын
My mother was a very pretty woman. My dad cheated on her all their married life. Some men just cant get enough women.
@mchris65 3 жыл бұрын
just look at celebrities who were cheated on with lesser attractive women, like Shania Twain--it's not about looks!
@kihmjones6782 3 жыл бұрын
Susan was a pure goddess. Still is!! The guy was trying to fill up a hole he had in his soul. It had nothing to do with her, it was all him!! We don’t need to think the woman is at fault or lacking anything. Funny how women often do that. It’s a shame!
@Croneposse429 2 ай бұрын
We were the generation who learned about love and relationship from TV and the movies! I can so relate to the topic. As a young girl, I was desperate for love and glamor promised (I thought) in the movies and lived my life in the glamorous shopping malls we had here in San Francisco (most of which are long gone here now). I am still learning about myself and learning to appreciate my resilience if nothing else. We truly are survivors!❤. Also loved the young man you had in the story, he really looked the part of perfection! Tall, sharply dressed, and friendly, the type of guys I liked, but we were always friends, because they didn’t see me that way, lol. I was short, cute and funny (because I had to be), and lonely. Really loving your content! You cover a lot of ground in a short period of time!
@martimar7181 4 жыл бұрын
Someone told me once: If you really love someone they can do anything wrong and it won’t matter. If you don’t really love someone, they can do everything right, and it won’t be enough.
@LittlePoet 4 жыл бұрын
I love that quote and I think it is very true...painfully, true! xxoo Merry Christmas to you!
@jjglasco8283 4 жыл бұрын
I am so proud of you! My husband and I had alot of ups and downs, but what kept us together was that God, whom I call Yah was the center of our marriage. I went through different emotions -- love, hate, resentment, frustration, but through all those emotions, I prayed constantly for understanding. How we survived to 36 years of marriage is a miracle. Your husband is a fool. You are such a keeper! I hope you will find your soul mate. You have so much love to share. Thank you for being so transparent. Love you, girl!
@firefeethok_tui2355 3 жыл бұрын
You sharing your story and then the way you do is so powerful. All the ladies and gents posting below there similar type of stories it’s a testament that many many people go through really awful things and they continue on in life recovers. Two people reading this there’s always hope, it will always get better, and when you feel really bad it’s a reminder to yourself that it’s time to change things.
@riverramblings4843 4 жыл бұрын
Your hair looks so wonderful! Love the movie pick! Will be watching it soon! And YES! I absolutely poured myself into a relationship, then said one day "If being with me is not what you want then you might as well leave (thinking he'd say - why of course I want to be with you) Well...he didn't say that, he walked, very calmly and detached he went, out the door, out of my life... never looking back even once...
@kindred1113 4 жыл бұрын
One should never change to please someone.....I was married to a man I loved so much and he loved me, One day I came home from work and he had packed and left without talking to me or leaving me a note...I was devastated because I loved him so......It took me a long time but I did forget him...not easy especially when you think all is perfect....Life is not always easy....but now I am happy being me,,,,blessings....MINDY
@sharoncrawford3042 3 жыл бұрын
I got a good one for you. I was married in 1978. I had a baby girl in 1980. One day my husband came home. He point blank told me I dont love you and Im leaving. I was sitting in the chair holding my newborn baby. He left. He came back 2 weeks later. I tried to work it out because we had a baby together. But when she was about 8 months I told him to leave and divorced him. But 2 yrs later he became a christian and his lifestyle was totally changed. He wanted me to remarry him and I did. Weve been together since then. We are now in our early 60s. What I am most thankful for is that my daughter didnt have to growup in a home without a father, and that her real father was there throughout her life. She is 40 now. I am thankful to God. He did a miracle. Would have never have happened without the Lord.
@barbiec4312 2 жыл бұрын
Wow. You have to wonder what the secret was that had nothing to do with you. Gay? Abused? Something he felt was so bad he couldn’t say it. Hugs to you.
@joanhenschel3511 3 жыл бұрын
Your video resonates within my soul, and for the first time I realised many, many years back I just wasn't myself with my true love. I almost reflected him in my lifestyle, looking at life through his eyes. We started dating the last two years of high school, and I was so in love with this guy. When I was 21 years old, he left me for a woman 18 years older than us. I married my daughter's father on the rebound, and spent 18 years of sheer hell, married to a narcissist. Yet I always felt an immense tender love for my high school sweetheart. He featured a lot in my thoughts, to the point of me feeling so frustrated that I still nurtured feelings for this guy! It's only after I watched this video that I realised how much I had lost the true me all those years ago. Thank you for your absolute raw honesty. God bless you, Sweetie.
@darleneklonk9128 4 жыл бұрын
I went through the exact same thing......and rebuilt my life, also.
@gisella2104 4 жыл бұрын
Hi I’ve just recently discovered your channel and I’m so happy that I did ! Your videos are so motivational and inspirational and if I ever got the courage to have a KZfaq channel I’d want it to be like yours. I’m 61 and having some difficulty accepting the whole ageing thing. I’ve always put a lot of importance on thinking you have to be beautiful and slim to be happy and also believed if you had a good man that would make everything ok! It took me until the age of 57 and going through bouts of depression and even anorexia to realise how wrong I was...i felt every word in my heart (with lots of tears) as you spoke about yourself and many of us women that think we have to be somebody else to please our partner; to be happy...it took two terrible long term relationships for me to get where I am today and know that I am good enough and can be happy being single. I still look after myself and love make up and getting hair done, I also exercise regularly but it’s for me first! After 3 years on my own I’ve recently met a wonderful man and he loves and accepts me for who I am....the real me. Thanks again for your videos you’re a beautiful, warm person. Best wishes from Australia and hope you and family are keeping well and safe.
@laurajones9087 4 жыл бұрын
We had married late, in our thirties. I was pregnant with our third child and my husband was unhappy that I had become pregnant again. His company sent him to the west coast for a managers meeting. While he was gone I had a miscarriage. I called him to let him know. it was 5 am east coast time (2 am west coast). The phone was answered by a woman--my best friend. I had no idea they were having an affair. He sent me a dozen red roses (he had never sent me flowers before). Then he came home, packed and left the children and me. I raised the children on my own and they are now wonderful adults. I'm still single. Oh yes--he married her after she left her husband and they had a family. I guess it really was true love. Just not with me.
@sharoncrawford3042 3 жыл бұрын
What a bum.
@firefeethok_tui2355 3 жыл бұрын
Sharing your story reminds me not to feel so bad for myself. Sometimes I feel I’ve got it bad but dang that is a rough one I’m glad you came out OK. I guess in the end we all come out OK if not bruised and scarred.
@terri4353 3 жыл бұрын
Screw him! I hate men like that!
@ldenney2 4 жыл бұрын
I had a boyfriend who used to tell me he was coming over & I'd change my plans & then he wouldn't show up! My friends would see him out having fun. It took me a while to figure out his game & finally phase him out! Live & learn, I guess
@CVenza 4 жыл бұрын
Susan, what a story! You escaped that husband/narcissist and survived my dear. God has truly blessed you and kept you safe from further harm to you and your baby boy. Don't you see he knew you adored him and he wanted a supply that festers only in narcissists and that supply is attention- regardless if its good or bad. He expected for you to run after him and to self destruct all for him so he can indulge in your pain. Narcissist are always cheaters and liars and look for a spouse to support them. Spouses of narcissists suffer long term and loose their money to them, wind up mentally and emotionally broken, feeling defeated, incomplete, useless, ugly, and sometimes end up in jail! This list goes on; this way the narcissist has an endless supply of attention. They are empty inside and never satisfied. Thank God you got out my dear, and look at you now strong, lovely and talented.
@aungar2403 3 жыл бұрын
I mentally understand what you say about narcissism, but the heart doesn't compute. I am trying very hard to stop the pain and to forgive, but it's so hard.
@domenicagereaux6715 4 жыл бұрын
I loved ( & hated) this video. It brought up so many emotions. My husband cheated on me and I too tried to do what I could. You always seem to be in my head sweetie with your little talks! 😉 Keep on doing what you do. I truly enjoy your channel and Desi. 🐾💕
@annanorth7997 4 жыл бұрын
You are so brave for sharing your heart and personal story of loss and pain. Three years ago, I found out my husband of 30 years was having an affair. He is remorseful and we are trying to rebuild but the trust is shattered forever.
@monicacappetta7017 4 жыл бұрын
With time I hope your trust is regained.
@blueseptember2174 2 жыл бұрын
Anna, how are you now? Did it work out?
@annanorth7997 2 жыл бұрын
@@blueseptember2174 We are doing well all things considered. Do I trust him? No. Do I check behind and constantly worry he is cheating? No. I decided from the beginning that he was not going to have the power to destroy my happiness and peace. Also, no second chances. Another affair and it's divorce. We have shared a lifetime together and have a beautiful family. We still laugh, love, and share common interests. But sadly the trust is gone forever.
@blueseptember2174 2 жыл бұрын
@@annanorth7997 thanks for the update. I totally understand as I'm in a similar situation but not many close to me have had to experience this(which I am happy for them). Do you think that even though there is still love and family but the trust is gone that it is all worth it? I know that is a personal thought but I guess I'm looking to see if this is a sustainable way of being.
@feralgal46 4 жыл бұрын
I just finished watching "Home Before Dark" on Amazon. Thank you, Susan! It sure triggered a lot of emotions..buried memories and deepest wounds of my life. 24 years with a man who told my children how crazy I was from their infancy on and I allowed it because he convinced me it was true. I saw myself in Charlotte for sure. I have been healing now for two years after a five year relationship with a Narcissistic abuser....the last in a long string of cold hearted guys I will ever allow into my life. At 73 years of age, I honestly never felt I could make it through this dark night of the soul...but I have. I have been finding the real me and I love her! My only craziness was loving and staying with self serving ego maniacs who gas lighted me into believing they never said what they said...did what they did...or promised the things they did. Here's a big thank you to the man I finally had courage to walk away from. He triggered abuses from my earliest childhood and now I feel free! Blessings!
@LittlePoet 4 жыл бұрын
Oh my gosh....the last 20 minutes of that movie made me cry so hard! What an amazing brave woman you are!!! I am so sorry you had to go through that marriage with that man gaslighting you and making you feel crazy. When you said you feel free....I am so happy....that is how I feel....free from being owned....thank goodness fro you. I just love you!
@jenjem5810 2 жыл бұрын
You are so beautiful and elegant and truly gracious. It is strength... to stay apart, and not give yourself to an imposter. You are a true gem. What a lovely person you are.Blss your heart. "Downed tree entangled in obsession." You are on your journey. This was just a blip on the screen of Forever.
@bettybert9819 4 жыл бұрын
I just now discovered you, and I’m so happy I did. “Home Before Dark” was filmed in Marblehead, Massachusetts, where I was a young girl at the time. I saw Jean Simmons and Efrom Zimbalist, Jr. at a small restaurant in Marblehead called the Bide-a-wee. They were so gracious and friendly, and spoke with me for several minutes. I am now a 71 year old Gramma, but that movie was one of my most memorable. Thank you for bringing it back to me. You have a new admirer in me, and a new subscriber as well. Blessed be.
@julievenus3670 4 жыл бұрын
By this age, I've learned those harsh lessons. Great reminder and video. Love and peace to you and Desi 💜
@elizabetherwin9192 4 жыл бұрын
My husband cheated on me. So I decided to leave and get a divorce. He had a stroke, so I couldn’t leave him in that stage. I nurse him back to health. Took him to swimming pool to help him with physical therapy. I cooked from scratch to watched his high blood pressure and diabetes. I helped him get rid of diabetes which is very difficult to do. I was cutting coupons to save money. Then I found out he would give thousands of dollars to his girlfriend while she did nothing but take his money. I had enough and left. I am still struggling but soon one day I will be stable.
@RandomLifeProductions 4 жыл бұрын
Brilliantly filmed Susan, I have so many songs in my head. I can’t make you love me George Micheal, let it be of course the Beatles; when it comes to breakups. I think these two songs helped me.... get through. But I also broke a heart, which resulted in actually breaking mine for a long time; it’s a story one day I may tell. This film pushed you and the filming was just awesome. It’s given me so much inspirational to push myself again and I thank you for that. Have a great week g
@LittlePoet 4 жыл бұрын
Oh my, you are so kind....I had so much in my head when I was filming this....filming with an actor is an amazing experience....like none I have had. You tell them what to say and how to say it and they do it.....oh my goodness! You could get drunk on that! I hope someday you will tell your story....all I have is guesses at most....:) xxoo
@jenjem5810 2 жыл бұрын
"Someone saved my life Tonight" Elton John.
@trishhannah2701 4 жыл бұрын
What a lovely video. I love how you incorporated your friend into it, playing his part 💜
@elcoreelcore 4 жыл бұрын
I remember when I was 18 I was seeing this guy . He tells me I can’t come around for a few days because his wife is visiting for a few days. I didn’t even know he was married! I was literal sick. Anyways, months passed, he called me collect from jail . I hung up and never heard from him again. So sorry, Susan.
@sharoncrawford3042 3 жыл бұрын
What a bum. Im glad you dumped that one.
@nancyedwards8293 4 жыл бұрын
I too married at 18 had child at 19. He was in the Navy was shipped out to see. Had our baby alone while he was gone. He came home and started cheating on me. After a year of being back home he walked in the door and told me he did not love me anymore and wanted a divorce and left me for another women. Alone with our child and no job it was very scary. I could write a movie about my story lol. Through out the years he weave into and out of my life till the day he passed away telling me I was the love of his life he was just messed up. So much more to my story but that's it in a nutshell. Heart broken yes and I still love him. Go figure!!
@sharoncrawford3042 3 жыл бұрын
Yep. Mine did that to me. But we ended up remarrying, and stayed together ever since. He was messed up at the time as well. He had to growup.
@suehedworth7809 4 жыл бұрын
I watch your weekly videos on Saturday mornings with my first coffee of the day. This week I cried you have the ability to touch my soul. Have a blessed weekend. X
@angietaylor5256 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you for your KZfaq share! I’ve been tracking my journey on Facebook, and watching you helped me bunches... knowing I’m not alone and that other, women, have gotten through worse! I’m grateful for the blessing of a Sweet Heavenly Father who has been w me during the 4 year separation.☺️
@ceecee7879 4 жыл бұрын
Oh my, 18. So young and vulnerable. Through that madness and sadness there was some joy...your son 🥰 Crazy that even today, women and young girls, no matter how much we “build up”, there is so much societal pressure that easily brings down. Like you eloquently stated, you must have the courage NOT to change. 😘
@catheyashburn433 4 жыл бұрын
Hi Susan, I'm coming over from Patti rxrtrmom's channel. This story is amazing. Once upon a time I felt this too. Gut wrenching pain. I recovered and finally realized I was not the problem. It certainly made me and very strong woman. Look forward to watching all your videos.
@esmeduplessis941 4 жыл бұрын
My husband cheated on me 30 yrs ago and I raised my 4 kids alone. I didn't think I'd make it, but thanks to God I did. Today i don't hate him, i feel sorry for him but I couldn't care less. What a relief. It made me the good, kind and peaceful person I am today. It's so wonderful to know I'm at peace. Thanks for your beautiful words.
@snuggleb100 4 жыл бұрын
I'm still married. But my marriage has been anything but special. He's been emotionally abusive for 29 years. I have 2 children with him. Why I haven't left him is because God has changed me. God helped me remove my emotions from him and live. I used to have such a horrible self esteem, but not anymore. He knows that I don't need him. Well I do, bc I don't have anyway financially to live on my own. We are also raising my 3 yr old granddaughter too! But my heart has changed towards him and I don't need him like I thought I used to. You have been through so much and what an inspiration you are. Your stories are such a blessing and you are so genuine, its refreshing. Thank you for being so open and candid. God bless.
@LittlePoet 4 жыл бұрын
Oh Cathy...You had me on the edge of my seat and you made me think back to a time with Bill....sometimes it is a belssing for our heart to grow cold....and feel it warm for other things that help completel us....thank you so much for sharing this with me..it was so proufound...xxoo Susan & Desi
@snuggleb100 4 жыл бұрын
@@LittlePoet I think it is the will to survive that drives us Susan to find a way to overcome the men in our lives that are so egger to belittle us. They are the ones who are actually with low self esteem and want to drag us down with them. My husband has in the past couple of years has finally said kind things to me and praised me for things. That was not what happened in the past. But God is in control and I trust him and am thankful he pulled my heart away, its my protection really. Hugs
@homehelpheart7440 4 жыл бұрын
Hello, sweet Susan, thank you so much for sharing your story! I've been doing a lot of that this week on my Facebook page. I've been sharing articles and videos on subjects that are important to me and then telling how it relates to me personally. Boy did this video hit home! When I was much younger, having a man find me attractive and desirable was everything. That's one of the reasons I don't date anymore. I just don't trust who I am when I'm with a handsome man. It's like my brain flies out the window. My first serious boyfriend of my adulthood was someone I loved so much. His best friend dated my best friend/roommate. Eventually, they both pulled me aside and told me that he was sleeping with someone else. They were trying to save me but it didn't feel like that at the time. It felt like they were purposely hurting me then. I did confront my boyfriend about it and he told the truth. I don't know which was worse, having my best friend and her boyfriend tell me about it or having him confirm it. Either way, it was the first major heartbreak of my life and one of the biggest of my life. I am so sorry that you went to the situation you did with your first husband. I'm guessing he must have been really immature or two because you just don't step out on your wife when they're pregnant with your child. I know it was horribly painful and difficult for you when he left, but he did you a favor in a way. He kept you from being in a 20 or 30 year relationship and being miserable because you knew he didn't feel the same about you that you felt about him. Love you! ❤❤
@josephinerodriguez6332 4 жыл бұрын
I had one love like that in my life. Even though I was madly in love I had no self esteem because all I wanted was to please him in every way. After living la vida loca for 7 years I finally woke up and was able to see that it was not the kind of love I needed. I broke free and got myself back. Thank you for sharing this very painful part of your life Susan. I'm sure there are many women who've lived in similar situations.
@Lisa-mp7ig 6 ай бұрын
Charlotte got her freedom and her sanity back when her husband finally admitted to her he didn't love her. Thank you for recommending this movie, I had a blast watching it. ❤
@sarahkyle9457 Жыл бұрын
I just listened to your post today, even though it’s older it still has a power to heal others from their painful experiences. Thank you for being so open and honest about your pain and healing ! ❤😊
@cynthiagreen6927 4 жыл бұрын
Another wonderful video. You’re so good at it. So look forward to your videos each week. I make sure I have the free time to set and relax to watch. Wish you put out more and they were a bit longer. Hugs sweet lady.
@Kiki-yo4hi 4 жыл бұрын
WE HAVE TO KNOW, THAT WE ARE ENOUGH, MADE BY OUR CREATOR, AND THE CONFIDENCE, TO ALWAY'S, REMEMBER THAT. 👍 💛
@dessy844 2 жыл бұрын
🙏❤
@christineterpens3136 2 жыл бұрын
Beautifully said, many of us from that generation were taught to give and give and fix and make situations work regardless of how we felt.
@amybriggs8423 4 жыл бұрын
Little Poet I love your videos it's like I'm talking to a friends
@light-yi2me 4 жыл бұрын
Ok, I was half asleep when watching this before but tonight I watched it again and I have to say that you are good girl! You should make a short movie some day ! It seems that you have a natural talent that should be nourished 👏🏻🌹👏🏻 the actor was so natural and believable !
@pata6045 4 жыл бұрын
Wow - talk about beautifully crafted - that describes every one of your videos. This one was so touching and you are such a strong woman. Eighteen is so young and with a baby but you stayed strong and beautiful. Look forward to Friday nights
@roylenekornovich3267 4 жыл бұрын
My husband and I were together for 46 years. A secure, successful marriage that is rare these days. I’m as in love with him today as I was the day we married. He fell in love with another woman last year and has been gone from our home since January. I’m not handling this very well. Haven’t began to heal at all....still in disbelief!
@Kiki-yo4hi 4 жыл бұрын
So Sorry that This Had to Happen to You.There are NO Guarantee's, in Life, Not even Life itself. From Second to Second, with Each Heartbeat, is All that We Have. Please Don't Waste the Precious Life, that GOD, Gave You.With Each New Day, Live Your Life, in such a Way, that Thank's GOD, for the Gift of Life, that He Gave YOU, and Put a Smile on your Face, Hope in your Heart, Think Positive Thought's, and Know, that YOU, Are Enough. This is Mine and my Husband's "2"ND Marriage. We have been Together for going in "44" Yrs. I Could Tell you Some Storie's. I Know that This was Devastating, but it Could "Turn-Out" to Be, a Blessing, In Disguise.You Never K ow, What, GOD, Has, In Store For YOU. Hold Your Head Up, Put Your Big-Girl Panties On, and LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE. I Know that We Don't Know one another, but I Care For Other's, and if This Happened To Me, I Would Want Them, To Say These Thing's To Me. Don't Know How Old This Video was either. I Hope and Pray, that Thing's, Are Better Now. (Watching 10/24/19)
@EmteeTeee 4 жыл бұрын
Oh my gawd.!!!! What the hell!!! I am so sorry.
@sharoncrawford3042 3 жыл бұрын
I can understand your feelings. Its really bad when youve been together so many years. It happens to alot of people. But you will eventually get over it. It does take time. I use to say divorce seems worse then death. But you will heal with time. You may meet someone eventually that you will love even more.
@barbiec4312 2 жыл бұрын
Ugh. Shocking. WTH?
@lakelizard8145 4 жыл бұрын
We never quite get over our first heartbreak. My mom told me "Always be yourself because everyone else is taken". I think I lucked out having a great mom. Hey little gangsta 🙋
@daisy7141 4 жыл бұрын
Eventually I got over my first heartbreak. I believe hormones make people do alot of things, just be aware.
@sharoncrawford3042 3 жыл бұрын
Im glad I didnt marry my first so called love. I dont think his life went well. Had drug and alcohol issues. We did try a second time. But .i was more grownup and he hadnt changed. I broke it off and started dating someone else, who I am married to now. We married in 1978.
@cathharr08 4 жыл бұрын
It took me a long time to realize that I am worthy with or without a partner.
@barbaracohen541 4 жыл бұрын
What’s the saying “Been there, done that.” Was married for 30 years, now 72. Despite illness, upheaval, life is better now than it ever was!
@katcapa2367 4 жыл бұрын
Yes,I have been there twice. First husband when I was twenty after my second child at 22. I divorced and was raising my children alone. Married at 32 to a younger man that I feel deeply in love. He cheated and I felt very much ugly. What was wrong with me.
@gigidavis5279 3 жыл бұрын
Spent my whole adult life comparing myself to every woman I see. Young or old, trying to figure out what was wrong with me.
@katzmeow60 4 жыл бұрын
No words 😶 I am going through my son’s estrangement because I will not be someone else for anyone , including him, and certainly not for his girlfriend. It’s very sad, especially during the holidays. I have three other amazing, loving children and grandchild to love me the way I am. You are my new KZfaq love. Thank you😊
@LittlePoet 4 жыл бұрын
Merry Christmas from me and Desi!!!
@jeanschnur-yenchik6097 2 жыл бұрын
I’ve just started watching your channel and I think your so wonderful !! Your silly, your fun and then serious as hell ! This one blew me away. I’m so sorry you had to go through this but your certainly a strong woman now !! I’m 61 and I’ve gone through a lot of my own crazy scenarios. Thank you for all that you do and who you are !! God bless !! Jean ❤️
@tinytoma25 4 жыл бұрын
You are absolutely amazing!! Thank you so much for this much needed advice and video!! I loved everything about this. I think most of us go through a very tough heartbreak in some point in our lives. Such a great message ☺️🙏👌👍💖
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