How to Tell Your Dating App Match You Want to See Others Before Committing- Early Relationship Tips

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How to Tell Your Dating App Match You Want to See Others Before Committing- Early Relationship Tips

Рет қаралды 1,402

Күн бұрын

How do you tell your new dating app match that you want to keep your options open and see others before committing? Here’s how to handle this early relationship conversation with diplomacy and ease.
Elena writes, “Hi Susan, thank you for your wisdom always! How do you tell someone you met through dating apps, that you would like to explore more and see other people before deciding to get into a relationship and giving it a label? What if we like this person a lot but are not yet sure if they’re the one but also don’t want to lose them if we say that we want to explore more? I’m very new to dating apps. Thank you x”
In today's dating online world, it's smart to keep your options open when you’re chatting up someone new. Even though you like them, you don’t really know them. Before you close the doors to other interested candidates, it’s wise to get very clear on what this person is looking for and how keen their interest is in you.
Are they texting you regularly? Are they motivated to meet you? Have you gone on a couple of dates already and feel good about where it’s going? If you can’t answer, yes to these questions, then it’s time to have a discussion with this person and let them know that you will be seeing others.
Communication is key. Be clear about your intentions and boundaries. It's all about finding the right balance between exploring new connections and staying true to yourself.
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00:00 Introduction
00:39 Viewers Question
01:23 Early Dating Decisions
01:57 Communicate Goals and 'It's Early Days'
02:13 How To Say It
04:49 Pace Determines Viability
06:29 Managing Their Staying on Apps
06:57 Negotiation

Пікірлер: 37

@LisaGemini 2 ай бұрын

Sane advice! Be friends first and build trust! Nowadays everyone wants to hop into bed right off the bat. Radical honesty! ❤❤❤

@SusanWinter 2 ай бұрын

Absolutely Lisa! Thanks for your commentary.😃

@Claus1234 2 ай бұрын

This is exactly what is wrong with modern dating. Nobody, NOBODY dares and wants to give 100% anymore. Always looking for the next one in the "stack" 🤨

@SusanWinter 2 ай бұрын

The young lady who wrote this question is very new to dating. and it feels like she hardly knows the person she “likes.“ So in her case, I think she needs more time and information -from him. Personally, if I were in her shoes, I would ask for exclusive time to get to know each other. That way she can better assess whether this is the right person for her. If not, there are plenty of people waiting online.

@marte1376 2 ай бұрын

Women are not going to lose their options for men that have nothing to offer. Do you advise the same to men or just you hate women have more options than you?

@zraiderz 2 ай бұрын

this is why honest communication is very important (newbie or not) you need to tell the other person that you want to slow the pace down and get to know each other. I'm pretty sure anyone would respect your decision. the last thing you should do is to remain silent and not talk about it while still swiping through app and dating other people.

@SusanWinter 2 ай бұрын

Agreed!!

@YouTubeUzername 2 ай бұрын

I feel like if you REALLY didn’t want to lose that person you shouldn’t date other people. I think it’s a good thing to date other people but its seems very selfish to want to date around and not want to lose a particular person. If she wants to date around then she should be perfectly fine with the fact that she may lose him.

@marte1376 2 ай бұрын

This comment must be from a man. It's ok to give it a shot to people and start getting exclusive, but it's a process. Do you advise men the same or only when it comes to women? Men truly hate women having options, which usually are higher than them. Men must start acting decent and being gentlemen if they want to be choosen

@YouTubeUzername 2 ай бұрын

@@marte1376 you must be a child. I am a grown woman and I am currently dating several men. It would be incredibly selfish of me if I were not ok with losing any of them when I am seeing multiple people. This is something that should be common sense. How could you NOT be ok with losing a person while you are out exploring other options? Humans are so selfish and self centered, OMG! 😂😂😂

@SusanWinter 2 ай бұрын

I want to remind you both that Elena liked a man she had met online. But she’s very new to dating. And I love the fact that she wants to focus on one person at a time, but she hasn’t had a discussion and I’m not even sure that she’s met this person. So that’s why keeping her options open might be important at this juncture

@user-bf6gn6mg2c Күн бұрын

Susan I trust you.

@Malithi-P 2 ай бұрын

Hi Susan, I’ve just got back to online dating and it really scares me. I want to be in a relationship but I feel this is the only way.

@SusanWinter 2 ай бұрын

I totally understand why people dislike dating online. And I’ve always said to use it as a “condiment“ not a main course. It’s preferable to meet in real life. But in order to do so we really have to make an effort to expand our social circle. I have a number of videos on online dating scams. And if you ever get confused about what’s going on, get the Dating Games Guide- link in the description below. That will give you the quick rundown on whatever weird behavior you’re seeing and how to counter the move. That way, you will not be fooled online or in real life.

@Malithi-P 2 ай бұрын

Thanks Susan! . I have also followed your channel since 2021 so will also take your amazing advice onboard too!!

@malungayesemusic 2 ай бұрын

This is so helpful Susan I needed this advice. Thank you ❤

@SusanWinter 2 ай бұрын

❤❤❤

@user-bf6gn6mg2c Күн бұрын

Susan Winters I trust you.

@Matilda130_ 2 ай бұрын

Hey Susan! Hope you doing well. I wanted to share a problem. I think I've lost all my feelings for them as they left me and got with someone else right after the breakup,it's been more than a year now but couldn't stop thinking about them for a single moment. I also don't know what I think about him,but he is always on my mind even when I'm sleeping. Can you make any video on it? It's making me depressed

@sushisam3010 2 ай бұрын

Susan, your videos are so heart to heart. I don't know if I can ask for a topic like this, but precisely because of the seriousness, I will ask: could you talk about how to put yourself in relationships with sexual compulsives people? Is it possible to have a healthy relationship with them? It's such a complex topic, if you could say something that you know and understand. What do you do when someone tells you, after two months of dating, that they are a sex addict? Because compulsion is not about sex, it's about trauma and pain.

@SusanWinter 2 ай бұрын

Firstly, let me say how much I appreciate your kind words. And your support. You also know that I don’t delve into certain psychological conditions or the realm of sex. I am not an expert in that field, so I stay in my own lane. I can only tell you this as one human being who has experienced addicted individuals - from family members to partners, you are taking on a rough journey. Determining whether you should stay or not depends upon where your partner is in their rehabilitation. Are they in a 12 step program? Have they gone to rehab? Do they have a sponsor? Have they made progress? Where are they in the arc of their recovery? I commend this person for telling the truth. That is a very good sign. Make sure you ask and figure out the questions I have listed above because that will give you greater clarity on your choice. You are in my thoughts.❤

@annastone5624 2 ай бұрын

@sushisam3010 Be careful they are not an abuser setting up a ‘story’ to manipulate you into accepting infidelity. I’ve heard of many guys using this. In my opinion that person is not ready for a relationship and can’t give you what you need, unless they have been 100% fully recovered for some time..

@annastone5624 2 ай бұрын

Even then it’s a dangerous thing to get involved in, esp if you have any issues of any kind yourself.

@fadajoana Ай бұрын

Thanks!

@Autonomous1969 2 ай бұрын

Susan what are your thoughts on this situation. A woman has split from her husband for about 12 years. He has a child with another woman but he still own half of the house with his ex. He has a key to the house and comes and goes as he pleases. Would you date this woman? It's a tricky situation for her as he could insist on her selling the house and she'll be homeless.

@SusanWinter 2 ай бұрын

It sounds like you’re aware of the fact that you were walking into a complicated situation. So she is staying in the house, but he can come and go as he pleases? I understand her staying in the house because half of it is hers. And to be honest, if they are in the process of divorcing, she would get something. Especially if she has invested in the house and half of it was her investment. But if these are early days, you may want to reconsider your options.

@Autonomous1969 2 ай бұрын

@@SusanWinter I do feel sorry for her. She tried to still be friends with him and all she did was back herself into a corner with no way out. Yes she would get half of the money for the house but she wouldn't be able to buy anything with that amount of money. Her ex is living with another woman and they have a child but it seems he thought he would get back with her which is why he tried to be best friends with her. I think a big part of why he goes to her house is to check up on her and see if she is with someone else.

@user-bf6gn6mg2c Күн бұрын

Susan I told you that you will be okay.

@marte1376 2 ай бұрын

Ladies should always have options and keep dating more than one. Men do it all the time amd hate when we do the same. Of course you don't have to tell him that. BUT men in dating apps are not to be trusted, apps give you the illusion you have a lot of options and if their primarily instinct is being on apps to get laid, which is the majority of them, forget about it. Have options ladies, until you find the ones for you that actually are convenient to your interests

@user-bf6gn6mg2c Күн бұрын

Susan Winters I like you allot.

@user-bf6gn6mg2c Күн бұрын

Susan Winters I like you too much more than I could ever tell you just as friends to begin with.

@ScottH7651 2 ай бұрын

If yiu really like someone, give the relationship a try. Telling a guy who asks you to be exclusive tfat you want to try other guys is a massive boner killer. Besides, why wouldn't YOU initiate the conversation?

@marte1376 2 ай бұрын

Men are like ladies these days. WhY dOnT yOU INitiatiaTe the conversation? Lol If he doesn't it bring the conversation he doesn't care. Initiative is an invention for men being lazy. Try harder

@SusanWinter 2 ай бұрын

I agree if you like each other and you have come to that point that you know you want to be exclusive. I just want to remind you that the person who wrote this video request is very new to dating and has only met the first man online. She doesn’t know enough about him to close the door to others at this point.

@ScottH7651 2 ай бұрын

@@SusanWinter understood. I should have been more clear with my answer. Being exclusive really doesn't mean anything and never did. People walk away from marriages all the time. She said she really liked him so she should give it a try. Else, she'll lose him.