The joke with the donkey is that figs were incredibly expensive so a donkey eating them would traditionally be a tragedy but he made a joke about it saying "get him some wine to wash em down" a modern day equivalent would be standing outside your mansion as it burned down looking to your butler and saying "well what are you waiting for get some logs for the fire"

I unironically respect the level of dedication required to follow your own rules so closely that you'd be willing to die if you, yourself, ever violated them.

My favorite ancient death belongs to Mithridates the great. He was a king who had a mini empire around the Black Sea, but was also incredibly paranoid that he’s would be assassinated by poison. He proceeded to do what anyone else would do on hard times and ingested poison. Only small amounts at first but amp up the amount as he went along, eventually becoming immune to most poisons. When the Roman’s were conquering his land, he tried to go out with as much dignity as possible and tried to poison himself. The only issue was that he was immune so that didn’t work. So he had his friend stab him and he promptly kicked the bucket. Mithridates died as he lived, not dying from poison.

Pythagoras didn't hate beans; he had a moral objection to eating them. He thought they were humans and that eating them would be cannibalistic. (He also had his own cult of bloodthirsty devotees, you should totally do a video about him and what a fucking charismatic math sorcerer he was)

I think my personal favorite funny death was the guy who survived falling down Niagra falls in a barrel dying from slipping on an orange peel.

Draco's big deal was that one of his laws was that all the laws had to be posted in public where anyone could read them. Apparently nobody had thought of doing that before and the laws were mostly an oral tradition among the high class. Big problem for anyone else accused of breaking them since they literally couldn't know what the laws even were.

Fun fact about the first emperor of China, he also had a massive amount of mercury in his tomb. A diorama of land with mercury rivers was said to be created, but the tomb is predicted to be so toxic we haven’t entered it and it’s a bit of a health hazard

iirc, Pythagoras actually really loved beans. Like in a cosmic way. He thought people's souls existed within them after death, so it was mortally 'sinful' to eat them or tread upon them. Different means, same ends lol

15:22 figs in his time and place were super expensive, he just had them imported and instead of what every other dude at that time wouldve done (idk kill that donkey) he found it hugely ironic and funny that something like a donkey eats like a rich man, thus the comment about wine

There is also a catalogue that was made in London in the 1600s called the “bills of mortality” showing what the cause of death was and how many people died of it in that week They have some goofy stuff on there

You forgot the best part about Aeschylus. A prophecy told him that he'd die by a house falling on his head so to avoid it he spent all his time outside

Qin Shi Huang also asked to be buried in a Tomb with a miniature of his empire with mercury rivers along with his terracotta soldiers to keep him safe in the afterlife. He was originally sold on the mercury idea by his royal advisors and doctors. The man asked for his tomb to be that way mostly because his mind is heavily poisoned by the mercury he constantly drunk everyday to live forever. Honestly, I blame the royal advisors for that one. Mostly because it's likely a plot to quicken his death so his second son could take the throne without too much of a hassle.

That "Turning a sphere outside in" reference was gold

Single frame of Huggbees watching the video "Turning a Sphere Outside In", by Huggbees 13:31

I like how most of the deaths in ancient times could've easily been prevented if they had any ounce of self pesverration.

Simon the Zealot makes me think of the shop teacher from South Park back in the day. He lays down on the table saw and it starts pulling him towards the blade feet first, and suddenly he goes "Jesus christ, what was In thinking?" and gets up and turns around so he's going headfirst and goes "That would've hurt like hell"

Huggbees is once again making comedy out of the human nature of its impending mortality Exactly the sort of content we all love to laugh at

That warframe joke jumpscared me because i was playing the game mindlessly while listening to this

The way Simon the Zealot died is especially gruesome because being upside down causes the blood to pool downward, making the victim stay alive through a majority of the process.

Qin Shihuang wasn't even the only Chinese emperor died of mercury poisoning since the ancient Chinese Emperors and their Alchemists were obsessed with its supposed property on immortality, but Qin Shihuang was the most obsessed one since his tomb was rumored to have rivers and oceans filled with mercury and the burial site actually has abnormally high content of it in the soil. It's crazy AF.

Dying of laughter at a donkey eating figs has to be the first recorded dank meme in history

A girl at my middle school died from choking herself because she "wanted to get high". Apparently it's called the choking game.

The fact that I had this video open while I was playing Warframe has me convinced Hugbees knows his audience far too well

2:12 floating half of headphones, can't unsee, certified wizard.

In Boston there was a literal flood of molasses which killed people. People literally drowned in a type of sugar!

No, I'm not dead yet

the fact that Huggbees has accepted in the first minute of the video that a lot of his viewers put on his videos as background noise is to me, ironically funny

"Cuddle Puddle Death Penalty" Is officially the name of my new metal band.

A literal ghost: "I'm sure hugbees I'm not dead"

Huggbeees I would like to say that you have provided me with so many hours of entertainment and I cannot be thankful enough for what you've provided me. Every time I see those sunglasses I am thankful that they look cool for if it weren't your sunglasses I don't you'd be as entertaining or as cool. You're sunglasses make you the coolest and most entertaining guy on KZfaq. Edit: Nice voice too.

This feels like the natural progression from growing up on “stupid deaths” from horrible histories

Thank you mr. Hugs Bees for taking that gumble and guessing that someone in the audience indeed will be paying warframe while alt tabbed. I salute you for becoming the reason why I check my wardrobe for spying boogeymen.

My world stops and my heart skips a beat when you upload a video, Huggbees 🥰

these videos are always so fascinating to me. thanks for the banger content as always mr. huggbee

The donkey eating figs is like having a basset eat an entire wheel of brie. An expensive, yet hilarious, tragedy. This happened to and I almost died of laughter.

14:00 Bro was so mad he was willing to take it up with God in person

13:25 did he teach her how to turn a sphere outside in?

9:20 Pythagoras refused to eat beans because to him, a cut-open bean looked too much like a human fetus.

0:55 you couldn't be more wrong, I was doing the weekly quests!

8:52 For a math wizard, Pythagoras ironically hated counting beans. Shoutout to Mistake of Pythagoras, one of the wackiest Half-Life 2 mods ever.

6:30 I heard Popeye was actually based on a real sailor who lived in the same town as the creator, even down to the pipe and the spinach.

As someone who is going to be dead this is a very informative video thank you mr the hug bee

Can we get a part 2 video please? I love hearing about stupid deaths. More please

Not often a person casually throws in a hotwife joke. Congratulations Hugbee

Hugging bees thanks for sharing these wacky deaths, Just marvelous!

Imagine dying to the death of a fictional character, I can’t think of anything weirder, to be as random as possible imagine falling over and dying in your chair because you died in a Mario game or a reviewer mentioned the death of a character you’ve never heard about

Theres no way you knew I had this on my phone while I was doing my daily missions in Warframe! Lmao

Fun fact about Caligula, despite being a very famous emperor, he didn't even appear in any Fate/Extra storylines after he debuted in F/GO and is now just a one turn murderer that dies if he gets breathed on.

Minute 6:00 - "Here's a beautiful and peaceful background of clouds while I tell you about peoples' deaths." LOVE IT. Monty Python would be proud.

Huggbees: Are you dead? Me, an intellectual: my soul is.

Scaphism is actually ranked as the second most painful thing some can experience

how Huggbees is able to tell i've been playing his video in the background while playing Warframe's daily sorties is unknown. but i will continue to do it as he has allowed me to

15:05 *The inventor of 21st century humor.*

actually, pythagoras didn't hate beans, it was the contrary, he really liked them and considered that its resemblance to a human fetus mean't that they should be treated as such and killing them, and therefore eating them, should be as illegal as killing a person

12:31 love the call back. Gorgeous

"Zeuix died of laughter because of how wonky his painting of Aphrodite turned out to be" *Moistcr1tikal with his Markiplier portrait*

That is the precise tone to take when talking about eating toxic metal on purpose

17:16 A lot of what we know about Caligula is from his enemies btw.

I like that your hair on your head and your beard are the same shape just flipped it’s like you could reflect your face around the x axis and it would line up

What's funny is that you said Qin Shi Huang pretty close to correctly, but then the name was misspelled on screen (Great video, as always. I genuinely don't give a crap if you misspell an ancient emperor's name)

I thought that this was going to be another gag video and looked up the first death because of the hilarity and obsurdity of it and was pleasantly surprised that its 100% real lmfao this makes the video incredibly entertaining more so than before lol. Still love the gag vids but comedy based historically accurate content is gold! More of these pleeease

Zeno was so pissed at the "unseen forces" for making him trip so he decided to die and come up there to settle things

I watched over half of this video before realizing you’re the guy behind “how it’s actually made”. I love those videos. Keep it up!!

15:11 1500BC humor

"Are you dead?" The answer to that question depends entirely on whether you mean on the outside or on the inside.

13:53 are my hands really THAT cold

Even Huggbees knows that whenever incest pops up as a subject, his educational video on turning a sphere inside-out will inevitably be referenced.

17:25 when the upside down cross is the one all Bible followers supposed to use as "not one man is on" the same level as JC. So any "Satanist" or anti-church person using it is more faithful then the rest

There was a baseball player who swung at a pitch so hard he ruptured his bladder and died afterwords. He did hit a home run at least. Another one died after trying to eat a steak in one bite. His last words were "watch this"

I already did my daily zariman quests in wf. But, I'll watch this again tomorrow for you

Ah yes the long awaited sequel to “weird last meals” and “weird last words”

"The pulled a reverse Penny on that Greek’s goofy ass and tortured him to death with his limbs exposed to bugs that dug into his skin… *That’s hot"* -Huggbees, 2023

8:45 youtube's going to love that background

Sure hope I don't die while watching this video.

15:29 i died laughing on this 😭

Man I didn't want this video to end, really hope it does turn into a series!

Bro said Crispy Lips and I legitimately laughed out loud for five minutes while driving my work van, after which point I had to rewind to the donkey moment, and proceeded to do the same thing again. I love it here.

1:55 same here buddy, same here

I bet if the Mayans would’ve wrote some shit down we would have a longer list

Dude fucking thank you for making this awesome content, this is exactly what I didn’t know I wanted to watch today. Already on my second rewatch

You should totally do a video on weird saint deaths - there's a lot of material to be had there! My favorite is probably this one saint whose name I don't remember who was a teacher, and when it was found out he was a christian he was sentenced to be killed by his own students. His students proceeded to mob their former teacher, tearing him apart with their bare hands, bludgeoning him with their writing tablets, and stabbing him with their pens until he finally died. Also, his students were all no older than elementary school age at the time, so the dude basically got ripped to death by a bunch of ten-year-olds. If that's not weird, I don't know what is.

16:20 I LEGIT CRY LAUGHED WTF

Love the videos man, keep up the good work. For anyone who is interested, Pythagoras didn't hate beans, he thought each bean contained a reincarnated human soul, so eating them would be essentially eating another human. He couldn't crush that many bean plants to save his own life

My favorite genre of KZfaqrs are ones that make videos about whatever the fuck they want and you’re at the top of my list of those KZfaqrs. Keep up the good work you handsome man.

I've also heard the chrysipius story, but the donkey is said to also be drunk, hence making it difficult to consume the fig. So calling for more wine is just some drunken teasing, maybe... glad you had that one in your list though :D

4:47 makes sense since it sounds like pancereas

great video. wish you’d make more old comic book or just superhero videos. i found your channel through the “why riddler is the best batman villain” video and have been watching since

"Then he held his breath until he died." Okay, that one caused me to lose it. 🤣

A list of things i am afraid of dying to: - Falling plant pots from the balconies of apartment buildings. - Falling single window AC units from apartment buildings. - Lightning. - Falling down a tall flight of stairs. - Being run over by a steam roller. - Drowning in the ocean. - Being impaled by the horns of a cow, bull or antler. That's all I can think of for now. I'll write more in the replies. I'm quite interested in what you guys are afraid of dying to.

Every time I think there’s no way Your comedy can get Better And somehow you keep finding my house address even though I keep moving slapping me on the face looking deep in my eyes and saying watch😂

15:40 I went to look for a video of a donkey eating figs

Took me a second to get that gag of flashing a single frame of Turning a Sphere Outside In at 13:31. Clever.

I could list many reasons why but this video alone proves why Andrew will always be my favorite on the Official Podcast! XD

You should do a video on the deaths of famous philosophers. Every single one died in a weird way.

Marcus of Arethusa must be an ancient relative of Andrew's - he died from _hugging bees_

“Are you dead?” Well I mean, I am on the inside…

I still don't get the Chrysippus joke. Never mind. I get it. HornayGermanHalberd explained it and it's also difficult to translate humor across language, culture and date. Animal eating like a human. Kinda funny but also really stupid.

A possible candidate for a future installment of this would be the recent case of Dennis Hof, an "adult business owner" who ran for an election in Nevada in 2018 and managed to win the election despite passing away three weeks prior.

10:51 Fucking El Macho over here gone wrong.

4:36 Oh, that's where Pankratops gets it's name, neat.