True. We're crazy, but I chalk it to evolution. Why, you might ask? Simple. In the Eocene, we hat to hunt and kill large animals to feed your tribe. You might die, but if you don't and manage to take down a Mastodon you lucked out. If not, pray that you women collected enough berries for you, else you and you tribe WILL starve to death. This pressure made us more prone to reckless behavior, high risk, high reward thinking and never truly left out our genepool, because tend to be a sucessful behavior.

I chalk it up to the space race. When we are trying to prove to each other that we are better at anything, we are willing to take big risks, kill the first few and make it work a bit better the next time.

Because fuck you is reason enough to do epic and stupid shit.

because fuck it you know?

"Its cool" is a justifiable enough reason to go and risk all to go travel in space

H: _Note to self: Hold off on inviting aliens to next month’s Ghost Pepper Festival...._

Hey, you try growing up on a planet where the water is filled with nasty microbes! The alcohol kills them too, and they don't have our fancy shmancy livers to deal with it! ... Yes, we do render our livers nonfunctional by drinking too much... Yes, even though they have mad regeneration powers... What's your point?

UGNAvalon ha

"Because lives would be too easy otherwise" is the most barbaric and stupidly badass sentence I have ever seen

Deadpool coming out of nowhere: that where you're wrong! Alien: (screaming)

Honestly I couldn't stop imagining the human as some sort of creepypasta. That made this awesome transcript a bit better, but it would've felt the same even if I didn't. Keep up your amazing work!

Aw thanks! I literally just wrote it on a whim after watching this video; I haven't really written anything creative in ages.

This is some of the most epic shit SEYMOUR LOOKIT THISSSSSS

Aww thank you!

Clockwork Kirlia Wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it ;)

Another human:*pops up behind him*WHY THANK YOU!!!

Human: heck, we have modern chemical projectile weapons ... and yet some of us practice fighting with metallic war clubs that traditionally had a sharp cutting edge in ways that would be lethal were the steel death sticks sharp, and it's a sport we call HEMA! Alien: incomprehensible rage induced screeching!

Human: Try this. *Puts headphones on alien* *Aliens expression slowly starts turning from confused to happy*

AWWW THATS SO CUTE THE FEEEEELS

Aaaawww! That's so good! I like this hug alien a lot. As a Scot, I feel I should point out that there *are* implements useful for both song and violence. Bagpipes, for instance, function as both beautiful musical instruments and long-range artillery.

Clockwork Kirlia holy fuck

Clockwork Kirlia I’m sorry, WHAT? How do you use bagpipes as artillery?

One day in the future people will hear what is love and not sing that. and that makes me sad.

Human: Heh, let me be serious. Love is complicated. Google said it's an, "intense feeling of deep affection".

HI FELLOW ONCE

@@maxiwaxipads me: but all we know, is much more complicated than what Google said.

석진폐물seokjintrash TWICE, I WANNA KNOW KNOW KNOW KNOW WHAT IS LOVE

Potassium cyanide.

I must protest, the correct definition of Torture is "Torture is when somebody in an official capacity inflicts severe mental or physical pain or suffering on somebody else for a specific purpose." for Amnesty International ^^

Also, torture is one of the least effective methods for gathering information. More often than not, a person will just say what they think you want to hear, just to make the pain stop. The CIA avoids using torture not for moral or ethical reasons, but because it doesn't actually work.

@@Parker8752 depends on thresholds. A certain pain worse than the pain of telling or it's consequences usually gets people to talk. People choose that. Police use it all the time. It's why those who speak (what some call snitches. the proper term would be witness or informant, or such, depending on the scenario) are usually not as bad as their comrades think they are. It's quite effective. Though the hypocritical betrayal from their comrades and the alienation they usually get afterward is usually worse than what the comrades do to them. The exile hurts them more. This is the strategy, or they can keep someone who is compromised. They won't. So it separates and divides those who are wrong. It's cruel, but it's considered deserved or justified cruelty.

The kill pill's called Cyanide

Stop misinforming the aliens like that. A murderer is one who unjustly AND maliciously kills another human. A homicide is not murder unless both the elements of malice and injustice are present. Also, "it's against the law," is a morally bankrupt justification.

@@horsemumbler1 Well, considering this should actually be called Humans are Shit at Explaining Themselves, the Planet, and Understanding their own Timeframes, this misinformation is to be expected.

Getting very technical, homicide is simply the killing of human by another (cide meaning killer, hom meaning either “same” or “human”) their can be accidental homicide, we call it manslaughter and usually reserve homicide as a synonym for murder legally. What can be really disturbing is getting into all the words for murder, but if people with a specific relationship to you: Patricide: Killing your father (from the Latin Patr = father Matricide: Killing your mother (again Latin Matr = mother) Fratricide: killing your brother (Latin Frat= brother) Soroicide: killing your sister ( Latin Soro = sister) Infantcide: killing a child (compound word at that point) Filicide is a parent killing their own child And the disturbing list goes on from their. If it’s an identifiable group, we probably have a word for killing specifically them. Leaving off Genocide entirely, the systematic killing of an entire people group. Geno being latin for race/people. Literally means race killer. I’ll stop now. This comment might never see the light of day, given some of the words used.

Think about all the force that it can generate? One ship that can travel at the speed of light can decimate even the biggest star on our universe if it was to come in contact with it

Temmie sup Temmie can I buy the Tem Armor in T-Rex size please?

Rexy TRex yAyA

Temmie thanks Temmie gives 9999 G

Alien: Human, what is that other human consuming? Human: *sigh* Alien: what? Human: He's eating -a tide pod- *TEM FLAKE*

arcanom an original breakfast!

(audible shocked silence)

@@Dracophile7 Actually there are many varieties of domesticated rabbits that are primarily raised for food.

H: wait some animals die from their own over grown horn or teeth A: that is... Disturbing

H: well they need the sharp teeth to get at tough roots. In the wild anyway. A: but why the continuous growth? That seems...counterproductive H: I don’t know. It’s not the weirdest mouth we’ve had evolve here. Sarcastic fringe mouth bass and the helicon shark come to mind.

It’s the proper name of a rabbit

*alien puking noises and groans* EDIT: I thought your reply was the human saying it was awesome, and I just realized that my reply doesn't make sense when put together with yours. This is awkward.

it most certainly does still make sense! A just needs to develop the stomach for what their mind already knows they like!

And so, the human learned what "Corrosive Digestive Liquidifcation Fluid" meant

Do not pulp the space friend.

Me in the corner: I'm heading for the escape pods, I didn't sign up for this. Alien crew: to the escape pods!

My new favorite comment

*me playing on my video games with SOUND proof headphones* Oh no the neko fans are coming.....

JJ Paul yes

*arming Heavy Bolters, calling the Adeptus Custodes and the entire might of the Imperium of Man* STOP

MUFASAAAAAA ;~;

Jay Lawrence Me:your right there is no reason. Hey wanna watch code Geass? Alien:sure *gets to the final episode* Alien:*incoherent crying* Me:do you get it now?

Human: It's called "Empathy", feelings other beings feelings, even if they don't exist. Alien: And yet, you are still a barbarian species, even with this capacity..

You see Humans deliberately make us spend time getting to know these fictional characters so that when something bad happens to them, we get scared because of how attached we've become to certain characters ".....I thought this was entertainment, why does it involve death" I mean there's plenty of fiction with constant death and gore everywhere, those just generally not directed for children to watch "....."

@@pitioti empathy... ALSO work whit negative feelings... that include rage And whit rage And hate it's grown exponentialy

H: only some flowers induce pain such as roses but others are harmless and smell nice A: and why would a human grow a rose? self-torture like your species seems to enjoy? H: no roses are extra pretty and if you are careful they don't hurt basically a reward for being careful A: that does not line up with a lot of your species other choices

Crazy Dream no fuck you

ARE YOU SUUURRRREEEEE

I could like it BUT AM I GONNA!

It'd be funnier if there weren't still people advocating for religious genocide... In America. In the name of religious freedom.

TheAttacker732 if that stopped in the entire world I'd be the happiest man around.

Human: Well, you see this Archipelago, on the Fire Belt... Alien: Wait... Don't tell me one of the wealthiest and most advanced nation on your planete is build on a bunch of Island filled with volcano and constantly threaten by earthquacck 0.0 Human: .... Yes ?!... Alien: How they managed to not being killed?! Human:... They did, lots of people died during each Tsunami or Earthquacck, but they learned and adapted themself.

pitioti Other human: don’t forget about the 2 things the Americans dropped on them Alien: what is he referring to human Human: during the 2nd world war the japanese refused to surrender and were responsible for countless war crimes, so to save more lives america dropped 2 atomic bombs on them Alien: a bomb is a powerful explosion and an atom is a building block of the universe, how do those correlate? Human: well when you split an atom it releases alot of energy which was what the atomic bomb was- Alien: ok how much destruction did it do? Human: wiped 2 cities off the map, blinded any survivors and left a great deal of radiation in locations. Alien: and you dropped 2 on them? Human: yes... but it did end the war. Alien: so there was no more fighting? Human: actually it almost led to nuclear annihilation Aliens: note to self dont let humans near our weaponry

​@@TheGameMage_ Human: Speaking of weapons... Back then we had the choice of either developing the atom bomb, or going with Tesla's invention, which would've been an electric death ray for defense against airstrikes, and of course the U.S. chose the former. Alien: Why?! Such a defensive weapon could prevent war! Human: That's exactly what people thought, but everybody decided it would require far too much energy to operate and the U.S. really wanted the war to be over before Japan caused too much damage. Alien: Not only are you humans extremely barbaric as I have been made aware of thus far, but you must have a serious energy crisis. More advanced defensive beams exist on my home planet and they are powered effortlessly, we discovered a way to draw energy from antimatter a long time ago. Human: Ahh... yeah, for centuries lots of countries here had issues with relying too much on fossil fuels, struggling to switch to nuclear or renewable resources, and back then antimatter stuff seemed way out of our league. Alien: What are you talking about? My civilization invented antimatter reactors during our industrial revolution. And what exactly is a "fossil fuel"? I do not see how skeletons of animals buried deep underground have anything to do with energy production. Human: I don't know a whole lot about how it works, that's not my field of study, but basically the remains of ancient animals, being exposed to Earth's crust, slowly get broken down into chemicals such as oil and coal that could be refined and burned to produce energy, often as kinetic energy or as electricity. And we had not yet discovered antimatter when our industrial evolution began. _The alien begins to have a mental breakdown over the stupidity of humans_ Alien: Wouldn't burning those chemicals produce waste products?! What do you do with all that waste?! Human: For the longest time most people didn't care, and waste was just released into the atmosphere. It caused a phenomenon called "global warming". Alien: ... ... Why do you imbeciles like to harm your home planet so much?! Human: Now we're getting off topic! I brought up the death ray thing earlier because apparently many people theorize that Tesla was given the ideas for some of his inventions by aliens. Your thoughts on that? Alien: Wh- wh- First of all! If my race actually visited yours back then, Tesla's invention would be far deadlier than just an "electric beam", and it would be easier to power too! Not that we would let you barbarians near our weaponry in the first place anyway! Second! What's with you humans constantly blaming everything on extraterrestrials?! It wasn't too long ago you told me about that "raid Area 51" nonsense! Human: Erm... That's just what conspiracy theorists did back then, I guess. Back then humanity did not yet have confirmed interactions with aliens, and lots of people liked to believe they existed anyway, and believed that our governments were hiding aliens from us. They had the wildest imaginations and thought that the truth lied in Area 51. Alien: ... ... *_CONFUSED SCREAMING_*

@@rougered580 maybe

I used to have 2 chinchillas they where the fluffiest fattest animals I’d ever seen and I love chinchillas even more than I did before now

Random Human: *muffled yelling* AT THE PET STORE!

@@Dracophile7 A: whats a pets store human!

@@ghostie862 human: oh goodness. Where to start... I guess I am going to have to start with currency, then pets, then stores. alien: why did you add the word currency when my confusion was over "pet store?" human: becauss you need currency to obtain a pet at a store. alien: okay, so currency is some sort of bait you use to lure out these "pets" at specific locations known as "stores?" human: no... you see, if someone wanted something from someone else, they would offer something to that person in exchange. But the question becomes "what if I don't have anything you want in exchange?" This is where currency comes from. It is something everyone wants more of, and you can exchange it for nearly anything. alien: So currency has great value. What makes it so valuable? Is it a food? a fuel? a building material? human: not exactly... alien: ...its a worthless, shiny rock, isn't it... human: no. we give those to our mates to wear and declare themselves mated. Currency is sometimes it is made from metal, but most of the time it is just paper. alien: ... human: You haven't even heard half of it yet, but lets get back to the original question. A store is a building constructed to trade various items for currency. alien: a building. made to collect worthless paper. human: and tiny metal circles called coins! alien: is it too much to hope that these coins have a purpose? human: ... yes... alien: how is the trading ratio between currency and more valuable things determined? human: honestly, I don't know. I only know that currency has a value based on the value people think it has, and this has caused it to be wildly unpredictable, and often cause currency to become almost worthless, which is usually caused when a government prints more and more money until there is so much of it that businesses and other governments consider it worthless. alien: so the more there is, the less value it has? human: generally speaking, yes. alien: okay... my head hurts, but okay. Now, you skipped pets. is "pet" another name for chincilla? human: nope. pet is a word for any animal we keep in our home. Pets are another thing we love. Just thought I should mention that since you have been trying to figure love out. alien: ah. my species keeps symbiotic non-sentient species of wildlife to clean our homes and defend us from parasytes. human: you know, that is somewhat similar, but that's not exactly what pets are. They were originally in a symbiotic relationship with us, but most of the time we just keep them for the company. alien: OH! I am soooo sorry. This little creature is sentient! human: no? alien: you keep a non-sentient creature... for company? human: yeah, humans are pretty weird. But just look at this guy, isn't he soooo cuuute! alien: cute? human: its a word to describe specific features that instill deep, usually parental feelings. *looks at Chinchilla* he's so cute, I couls just squeeze him and gobble him up! alien: YOU EAT AND STRANGLE YOUR YOUNG!!!!! human: what?!?!? no!!! alien: but this creature is "cute" and should be instilling parental instincts! human: First off, we don't eat our children. Secondly, humans have no release for feelings of cuteness, so our natural instinct is to kill the thing that is cute so it stops being that way. It is a way of balancing our emotions through two extremes since we don't have a release. alien: !?!??!?!?!?!!!?!!?!?!?!?!?!! human: *chuckles* yeah... humans are weird.

There's going to be some Tribble now.

Let me guess, Australia?

@@moiaussi7722 nah they live all over the southern US my uncle once found an entire nest in his garage.

Only some of us are that stupid my alien friend.

I named mine Octavia :v

"books", definitely

No creativity

Ghost Of The Stars For some reason i feel inspiring

A part on how the alien understands that most stories are just huge metaphors and similes, and many /could/ be true (say tom Sawyer), if not down to the fine details... also, aliens discovering science fiction would be hilarious! (and how lots of it was quite predictive, see the dude who thought up skype in the 1820's

Creativity YASS

Take me with you!

You don't understand the thrill of a real battle! The blood dripping down your face, the heavy breathing, the adrenaline rush of combat, the knowledge that if you don't surpass your worldly limits, YOU'LL DIE!! Go ask Saitama how being at the top feels, then maybe you'll understand....

Or, think about trying to beat nations of GODS with nothing but your inferior wit! Knowing that your enemy can outthink anything you could ever come up with, one wrong move meaning certain death, not having the strength, knowledge, or even ability to fight, but doing it anyways, just to spite them! Look at them! Losing to a hairless monkey that brought itself into the world, AND MAKING IT EVERY OTHER GODDAMN PERSON'S PROBLEM!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!

H: There are certain projectile varieties that, according to international laws and agreements, are illegal for militaries to use in warfare.

Now shall we introduce them to EXPLOSIONS!

K'lex'or I have one question for you; *EXPLOSIONS?!*

H: *puts his airsoft gun on a shelf* A: Aaah, another one of your "guns", i presume. This one looks rather nice. H: No no, this is only a toy. A: A toy? What is it used for? H: Adult humans like to use them for fun. A: oh, i see, you test your marksmanship skills with them! H: No, we shoot each other with them! A: .... Does it hurt? H: A little bit, yeah A: You humans seem to enjoy pain too much... What is that thing on the side of the gun? H: This? It's a laser pointer, to help me a- A: I GIVE UP!!! FORGET PAIN, YOU FILTHY HUMANS ARE OBSESSED WITH LASERS!!!

@@CRO_Bash95 me: wait till you see our sci-fi media, Ark'klonia. Almost, if not all of them; has laser in various shapes and sizes. There's this anime from millennia back that has ring laser- A: (alien screaming noises) Me: imma firing mah lazah! XDD

IT'S THE WEEPING ANGELS ALL OVER AGAIN!!!!!!!

But what was it a statue of!? As far as I know, most statues are of people in history. I can't remember any statues that look like "flying, spine-covered creatues the size of three whales."

Houston Laing Tell that to modern art. (And all those pics of people thinking a pair of glasses was ‘modern art’

Meh. Considering all the stuff we already managed to do, we might as well domesticate those too.

I want this so badly and I am not even surprised

best plot twist 2k18😂😂

I did not understand the last part...

Wake Me Up When September Ends is a song by Green Day.

Crazy Dream dude stop begging for likes. The more you do the less people will.

I'm not going to like your comment just because you asked me to...

Crazy Dream dude. Your not getting likes begging like this. And yes you are begging, you have done this in multiple other comments If you want likes, then don’t go to different comments and ask for people to like it, that is actually counterproductive. Also, don’t be but hurt when someone doesn’t like yours, they don’t like either because it’s bad and rude or you are begging. Get used to it.

*Crazy Dream* Hey, remove the 'dream' prat of your name. That's what you are. Also, some point's I'd like to make (please don't hate me I just want to get this overwith) 1). Begging - ask (someone) _earnestly or humbly_ for things. What you are doing, my dear friend, is begging. 2). Lord Black is not trying to attack you. They are simply pointing out that begging will get you nowhere. 3). I can tell you are trying to be witty, but it will do nothing. I am not attacking/bullying you, I am just stating some things I'd like to say. Have a good night!

Can we just like admire how pure the alien is in this comment instead of arguing

What is a scrn'ghfl

It's the organule kfjsdfj'nians use to scrn'dl their fgfybv.

I love scrn'dling. It's my favourite part of the holidays.

Reported for sexual content.

Oh well. (You're joking, right?)

I haven't watched Red Vs Blue season 16 yet (the latest one that I know of) but I've watched the rest (1-15) and still get sad that Church is gone. He was, in my opinion, the best part of RvB. Goodbye, Church. At least you're out of Blood Gulch... It's what you wanted most.

I know

*liquid* *sadness*

Just wait until he sees the Kajhiit. Yeah, I spelled it wrong. I haven't played it in a while, even though it's my favourite game ever. Plus, it's 2am and I'm tired. At least I can name most of the elves... Altmer - high elves Dunmer - dark elves Bosmer - wood elves Orsimer - orcs ( ? elves) Dwemer - dwarves (deep elves) Falmer - snow elves (also known as "the betrayed" by some uncorrupted Falmer) Not sure about the Chimer, think they became the dunmer based on an in-game book, but I don't really know. Just realized I'm rambling. I really should get some sleep. 😴

@@CasualFire most altmer should die slowly and painfully

@@decade0240 Eh, some aren't that bad. But most of them can be politely described as "stuck-up snobs"

@@CasualFire The chimer are ancient Dunmer. They were also light skinned than their dark skinned cousins. They fought the Nords I believe.

Some say the Chimer are also ancient Altmer.

How did you not notice a wyvern when it was close enough for you to see it?

Houston Laing I don’t know. The human needs glasses

*inhale* *exhale* wYVERNS

This made my frickin day

Rexie ze Raptor I corrected it don’t yell at me

Alien: ......really

Alien: Did you forget what your kind has done!?

Human-No?.....

Crazy Riza Human: I remember, but no one in the modern age has put any kind of squirmy wormy thing in us!

OH GOD NO

repost

yeah, repost

Are you saying I reposted this? Because I didn't, I wrote it myself. I've commented this on a few of Seymour's videos but I still wrote it.

Humans and their damn lasers

LASERS ARE GREAT!

Amazingly complicated

there's also the fact that laugh tears, emotional pain tears, physical pain tears and lubricant tears all have different chemicals mixed in it... (mostly soothing/calming stuff)

Yes. What is human biology?

crying is also a method of relieving stress

@@gioelecarratelli4593 Wait, really!? That's so cool! :D I didn't know that!

Qhahahahhaahha

Human: *Follows Alien * Calm down. Let me explain. Some airplanes use what we cal Jet Turbine, which is basically a huge fan that sucks air in at extreme speeds, and in combination with tilted wings, gives enough propulsion to lift off Alien: *Looks at the human amazed* That's... actually ingenious, who thought of such thing? Human: Well... this is a debatable thing. Many great men contributed to this invention. From Da Vinci to Santos-Dumont and beyond... Alien: At least once, your species amazes me

Me wearing a tinfoil hat: That or we salvaged the design from a old alien ship.

But like manipulation of air currents isn't THAT hard to grasp and can be gleaned quite easily

@@KlavierMenn H: also those turbines sometimes suck some birds and end up grinding them into thousand of pieces

Dustinisnot indeed

Ha! Gaaaaaaayy

Human making rockets H1: I wanna go to the moon H2: Me too HNerd1: I have this thing that uses the same concept used in the internal combination engine. H1: Can you use it to bring us to the moon? HNerd2: Yeah, but we need a way for you to survive space H2: Perfect, lets slap it onto a vessel full of explosives A listening on conversation: Oh great they invented space vehicle- wait did they say explosives?

This is perfect XD

@@primary2630 I mean you're not wrong? but i mean come on.

Homestuck Trashcan Shipper Me: Neither will I, buddy... Niether will I...

viktor horvat humans are such strange creatures

Homestuck Trashcan Shipper That is why I admire them... US! I MEAN US!

viktor horvat yeeeeeeeah US Heh heh.. We are totally hooman

Human: some people think Australia is fake! Alien: how do they miss an entire continent?!?!? Human: they are stupid

TheSquidShack a cold is a virus...

Its better stab ourselves whit a needle fucking painful than diying slowly by the disease

Robby I knew someone was going to post this

Cancer isn't bacteria either.

Its also not a weakened version. Its a dead version of a previously known and common strains

Me: *Unpacks the cloning machine*

@@sderoz40 me: snaps fingers raptors notice me in the corner and walk over *clicks button on arm pad so I can talk to them* A: um what did you do Me: I'm taking your raptors bye *raptors follow behind I grab my rifle* I'm going hunting in need hunting partners A: *looks confused*

Man

@@sparkthefloofyprotogen3556 Why would you want a dinosaur that doesn't hunt in packs for a pack hunt?

*a family

A massage can kill you?

@@CasualFire the likely hood is low, but like everything else, its possible. Loosening blood clots, damaging tendons/nerves, agravating already existing conditions. And humans are squishy. Just fact

Wait till he learns of Cupping and waxing

I will, because why not?

plot twist: there is an alien that is exactly like that that nobody has discovered

They did that in Doctor Who.

Am I the only one who knew which movie based solely on the description "a certain sci-fi thriller"?

No wonder they keep wanting to invade us

Some people eat dogs though

... COW meat? Isn't it sausages made of PIG meat??

I don't... I... I'm not sure I want to be human anymore. Just because this would probably happen if aliens were real.

Yea sounds like us

Yep

Alien:wow I thought only you humans had bqeberoc rushes of strength when in danger also dont do that ever again

Me seeing it happen: don't jinx yourself.

H: Aw, c'mon, just try it! A: Urgh, fine... *2 days later* H: Hey, man, can I use the switch now? A: *hisses* Switch: "Took a hit, Test failed."

Switch:test passed A:*screams of joy* H:wow! You passed that test finally! A: now I just need to do the secret final boss! H:oh no.....

Rhett Burk Oh no indeed :P

This is good

YES

Laughs in Seinfeld

Holonet: “According to all known cultural and sociological schools of thought, there is no way that the species known as “Humans” should be able to sustain interpersonal relations with each other, much less other sentient races. Its habits are too self-destructive & rash to get ensure amicable or mutually beneficial exchanges of culture or trade. The humans, of course, rush off into the galaxy anyways. Because humans don't care what the galactic community thinks is impossible.” Human: “HA! Suck it! Now where's those space babes!” Alien: ... ... ... _facepalm_

You like jazz?

That is a very... expressive... child.

Houston Laing A four year old once told me that, I just said "You fucked up, ya little shitsake" (I was talking to her big bro who was ten AKA a rebel) and the next two days, the four year old said to me "You Fucked up little Shitsake!" *ENTHUSIASTICALLY* . Seems to me that four years olds pick up bad things more than the good things (This is another reason why I hate babysitting and love em)

Human: Language!

Me: NOW SMALL ALIEN CHILD WHERE DID YOU LEARN THOSE WORDS!!!???

@@pineapple7011 LMAO this remembers me. The first time I learned about sex was wen I was around 6-8 years old, the worst part? I learned it from my also 6-8 years old CLASSMATES.

That was very sad

SuperStar Swadloon was it Pistachio? (Cars 2 joke.)

@@dinodude8899 im like 80% sure it was wasabi

Bobby Crofts I was making a reference to Cars 2. Where Mater mistakes Wasabi for Pistachio ice cream.

Human: i know right

Human in the distance: If you think that’s messed up then don’t go on the internet!

H: NO.YOU.ARE.NOT! *human drags alien to the theme park* They do the free fall. (Decide the aliens reaction yourself.)

@@sderoz40 A: LET'S GO AGAIN!!!

@@Mattsimilate H: (exhausted) it's been 4 hours, we have to go home.

What about the wather-Parks? There is that one extreme "slide", for all I know, it's also called "free fall"

in free fall, your g-force is literally 0

MY species LITERALLY breath What would be poison for a espécie tão NEED methane Alien:... What?

Temmie Ganimation Disorder at least children are worth it! It's not like there's very many other ways to have children.

Jay Lawrence "Not very many other ways" I'm not sure I want to know if there are "other ways"

Houston Laing Well you can adopt kids. If you want to have your own kids you need to be pregnant at some point.

Jay Lawrence Oh... Adoption. I didn't think of that. That's not bad, guess I expected something weird because I watch too much Humans Are Space Orcs. Edit: my phone posted this three times. Wtf?

Houston Laing Ha!😂

Awwww yeaaaa someones gotta continue this

How can one have intelligence without insanity?

@@Dracophile7 true

Hehehe Ge-nus

intelligence let's you know how impossible the odds of life and the universe existing is thus you have to be a little insane to get shit done.

A life without insanity is not life, trust me on this one.

It's even funnier imagining them playing with kids. haha

Me- *in the background* I DO, ALSO, WE SOMETIMES WATCH RAPE AS WELL!!!

Human 2 : hey bro can i borrow your...... oh...... *slowly close the door*

...

Otakus and Japanese people not all

RIKI TIKKI ...

Hey man, I am sitting on top of a massive pile of treasures from the multiverse. Like this sword here, just press this button, and, (FWOOSH) the blade lights itself aflame!

Nullblaster The Voidmaker *FIRE!*

Nullblaster The Voidmaker "Is it a cheap replica or something? Where did you find it? Stuck on a rock somewhere?"

i fucking love you people

I've coll magic weapons from across the multivers I got this one *picks up Thors hammer and puts it on the ground in front of me* and this one *I pick up the monkey Kings staff and lay it in front of me* and this one I stole from someone else 10 minutes ago *I pick up a sword and click a button and the sword catches fire* and then my price weapon *I pick up Excalibur and slide it in its holster which is attached to my belt* I like magic weapons

ONE PUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNCHA!!!!!!!!!

Well, a sense of individuality and accomplishment that comes from showing your willingness to work hard for something rare, I guess.

he seems to have a nice universe going on...

Maybe a tv show

I thought of the Japanese back in WWII. lol

@@Shythalia well, the british were the last ones to did it and did it with modern rifles so... (british army in afghanistan charged the taliban with bayonets)

especially with the Dare to Dream short

Kal Skirata the dare to dream *long* as it’s like a minute longer than other ones

ShinyUmbreon if this were a long, then it'd basically be a novel

I wish it was real, because reading about all the crazy things we do, I just want to get off of this planet and out of the danger zone. Oh, and to see new worlds and all that.

Same

Or send an assassination strike, neutralize anyone with knowledge of the nukes. Desperate times, desperate measures. Plus I would rather not live in the Fallout universe.

Houston Laing, better do it before they announce the plans to the galaxy.

Hmmmm... just had another idea. It's kind of more evil and I don't really like it, but this is war. Lives are at stake. When the spec ops team goes in, have them plant charges on the nuclear warheads and if diplomacy doesn't work, we blow their nukes before they have a chance to launch. Pre-emptive strike. I'm not a fan of nuking aliens in general, but if they want it that way, they can have it that way. Am I evil? I don't want to be evil. Maybe I just read/play too many sci-fi things. Maybe it's just problem-solving skills that brought me these thoughts.

Houston Laing, but if all the nukes are gone conventional war could break out. As got it beaing evil, it wouldn't be any more so then sending an assassin, apart from caladeral damage. It's an interesting plan but I don't know.

totally not jeff Humanity would win at conventional warfare. Intuition, adrenaline, focusing on the present instead of the future... The Humans Are Space Orcs series has shown us, we are better at fighting than them. Plus, we would still have our nukes. They would be weakened, diverting resources to damage control and rebuilding after their nukes self-destructed. Not to mention a leadership crisis, because of the assassination strike. If diplomacy fails, we'll hopefully still have time to strike first. But if we simply attack, we can take them out before they are ready. If we act fast enough, we may be able to strong-arm them into a treaty with a large enough show of force. Or we could just nuke the bastards first and throw peace out the window. I wouldn't recommend that. Oppenheimer said, when he invented/tested the first working nuclear bomb, "now I am become death, the destroyer of worlds" and I don't think the nuclear option is a good one. It's more of a last, desperate strike when all other options are spent.

Oh no...

Probably about the same as we react to mermaids and dragons. In all likelihood the aliens wouldn't resemble anything in our horror films, and even if they did they would recognize it as fiction...assuming they understand the concept of fiction.

Did he just use the flash thing from Men In Black?

Aruka B You're not the only one

Contro Bot yay 😁

Yyyyeeeesssss

Samus Aran...

Wait no she doesn't count.

Actually it's more akin to boxing or martial arts tournaments.

Ian Mox *pokes head in.* “The anime clearly shows that Pokémon battle cause it’s fun for them! If they didn’t want to fight they could *EASILY* decimate their abusive trainers!”

*Alien draws his own OC*

I'm taking a screenshot of this, 'cause this made me laugh my ass off!

Some of us would totally eat alien flesh if it tasted good.

@@lonewolf209 U-uhm... *BLERG* w el l th e r e *BLERG* is c a nn i b a lis- *BLERG* -m ... *BLERG* S o in a wa y t h a t i s po s s i - *BLREEEERG*- ble

Because you are intellugent. Imagine their sighs of relief when the meet vegans, and what if they read Charlotte's web?

Humans walk on fine lines of two extremes.

Jessie Ovendale Honestly, we play with that line like a jump rope.

Ghost Of The Stars oh no

Ghost Of The Stars Damnit Splarg

Shipping? Oh no

H: oh no

Ghost Of The Stars oh yes!