I Fell for A Narcissist: Signs of My 10-Year Abusive Relationship

Рет қаралды 128,088

Күн бұрын

In Episode 2 of Dirty Messy Free, Sylvia Chan and her life coach, Daniel Lim, unravel the twisted tales of narcissistic abuse in her previous marriage. This episode is for anyone navigating the stormy seas of relationships marred by emotional blackmail and manipulation.
We dissect the hard truths about loneliness, the desperate choices made in its wake, and the importance of recognizing when a relationship has turned parasitic.
Witness the unveiling of four gripping stories highlighting the sinister dance of narcissism.
Join us in our call to arms against the soul-sucking grip of a narcissist in your life. Discover the power that comes with walking away from those who take more than they give.
MASTERCLASS ENROLMENT OPEN NOW: litolabs.com/how-to-human
TIMESTAMPS:
00:00 Sylvia Chan Reveals Her Truth on Being Lonely
05:38 Four Stories of Isolation and Regret
06:08 “If You Really Love Me, You Wouldn’t Betray Me!”
06:57 Story One: Screwing Up a Male Best Friend
12:51 Story Two: The Loss of a Female Best Friend
17:26 Story Three: Leaving My Family in a Malaysian Village
21:29 Story Four: My Social Circle Dumped Me
24:10 Unveiling the Common Thread Among the Four Stories
26:03 The Harsh Reality of Losing My Support Network Layer By Layer
27:24 The Number One Biggest Relationship Mistake
28:13 The “DARVO” Effect & Identifying The Narcissists In Your Life
32:26 Setting Boundaries & Non-Negotiables In A Relationship
33:22 The "Onion" Analogy in Relationships
34:52 The Fear of Unsafe Friendships
39:18 Wisdom from a Very Fierce Life Coach
41:30 Realising The Truth Of Loneliness, Desperation & Choosing Friends
43:34 Redefining Love, Relationships, and Connections
44:57 The Grand Audit of Friendships
46:57 A Life Coach’s Story of Losing a 27-Year Friendship
50:12 Healing & Moving On from Friendship Woes
52:55 Four Relationship Circles
53:13 Level One - Resolving Family Dynamics
56:30 Level Two - Fixing Best Friendships
01:08:39 Giving Voice to Life's Experiences
01:09:47 Level Three - Social Circle & New Friendships
01:11:53 Sylvia's Breakthrough at LITO Academy Party
01:18:06 Finding True Acceptance at LITO Retreat, Finland
01:22:06 Coming Home And Having A Relationship With Yourself
01:27:44 The Most Important Relationship In A Woman’s Life
01:29:20 Why "Dirty Messy Free"? Why Now?
01:31:58 You Are Invited!
01:32:20 A Surprise For You!
JOIN DIRTY MESSY FREE HERE:
Masterclass Waitlist - dirtymessyfree.com
KZfaq - / @dirtymessyfree
Spotify - open.spotify.com/show/49AcBwd...
Instagram - / dirtymessyfree
Tik Tok - / dirtymessyfree
Facebook - / dirtymessyfreepodcast
Dirty Messy Free is more than a podcast series; it is a group-healing and self-healing movement towards unearthing the beauty in life’s “ugly” moments and stepping into the freedom that comes with genuine self-reflection and acceptance.
CREDITS:
Co-Host - Sylvia Chan / sylsyl.chan
Co-Host - Daniel Lim / litolabs
Producer - Kenji Tan / litolabs | Epic Dialogue / epic.dialogue
Videography & Photography - Michael Goetomo / amerrymayhem
Studio - Apartmentofu / apartmentofu
Flower Décor & Set Styling - Heartwork Design Co / heartwork_co
Wardrobe & Styling - Your Fairy Godmama / yourfgmm
Hair & Makeup - Kat Zhang / katzhangmua
Studio Videography - Keane Tan / kea_n_e
Studio Photography - Hayden Chan / hyydnn
Assisted By - / thelovestudios | / davidlye | / wondurless
Editor - Phoebe Park / eun8eepark | Jarren Lau / jveszx
Audio - Yongsu Lee, Kyoungchan Won, Seonghee Han, Jihoon Kim

Пікірлер: 297

@at371 3 ай бұрын

the fact that her ex got into another relationship so fast after their divorce announcement. ek

@viviantan8937 3 ай бұрын

And he was the one who cried during their video + the fact that he kept repeating how “rich” he was while now hearing that Sylvia is in debts? Lol the shade there man

@user-lx1cp8ig7y 3 ай бұрын

@@viviantan8937he is the cunning guy

@davabyfoeth9706 4 ай бұрын

Hi Sylvia, I want to say that when the news came out, I had always been secretly rooting for your success. Because as a young student, I always wondered how can sylvia be so strong and successful but get slammed by a gang while you stood alone. I hated that not many showed up for you and I am angry for you. As a fan since day 1, I am happy for you right now, you never left my mind and I am so glad that my instincts of reading your strong character from the start was never misunderstood. I am an INFJ, and I always liked ur vibe despite what others said abt ur cold aura. I am so excited to see your masterclass blossom

@cynthialim400 4 ай бұрын

Why’s no one talking about how amazing the backdrop and decorations are!! i love the colours and props

@artcheryl 4 ай бұрын

Hahaha I did! It’s amazing 😻

@user-lt7uk3lr3l 4 ай бұрын

Witnessing ur growth and fall, I am still gearing for u. I ve always believe in you and will continue. I always feel you ve been wronged by him and when u’re with a toxic person it’s hard that u are not be an angry person. U are now better and doing so damn well!

@junyang1434 3 ай бұрын

So after two years I think we can all conclude that the ultimate winner are… the lawyers…. Shit too late for me to change my IT degree now.

@jack2665 3 ай бұрын

and Ryan of course. He gain everything from this and left shit for Sylvia. Can't even stand to look at him or watch his video anymore.

@libraries144 4 ай бұрын

Love that you are able to finally speak your point

@viviantan8937 3 ай бұрын

I think only people who have been through what she been through can relate to the things she said and why she wants to do this podcast. Imagine you being painted as the villain, getting into shit and debt after working hard for so many years while your ex-partner simply gets the money and is happy AF lol. We are all human, be a human and listen to her before commenting on her flaws. I hated her previously btw way before the saga, cos of her over-controlling character portrayed in the videos and it’s obvious cos everyone is afraid of her. As the saga continued, more signs were shown that she was forced into that situation and seriously iykyk how it’s like being in a manipulative relationship. It’s freaking tiring. They can throw dirt on her and then the moment she says her side, suddenly it’s “let bygones be bygones”? Lol

@danltm 4 ай бұрын

People gotta understand that therapy or coaching or counselling is only from one angle. There is also another angle from the opposite side and also the actual side which is a combination of both sides.

@stephtcreates 4 ай бұрын

I love this! So much reflection, so much wisdom. Thanks, Sylvia and Dan for providing the language to unpack these difficult experiences that many of us could be facing as well. No matter what happens to us, there is so much freedom available to us to decide how we want to respond to the situations we have in life. Realising and knowing what we can do with this freedom is so important and I think Sylvia is embodying the example of using this freedom, guided by our true selves. Thanks again for this amazing episode

@jamesjuze 4 ай бұрын

Forming meaningful relationship as an adult is tough. That's a huge problem in our society. There's so much to unpacked. Love this. Almost at the end of your 2 full videos. Good stuff.

@Forettee 3 ай бұрын

Hey Sylvia, just watched this.. there were heart wrenching parts in these episode😢 but you stayed strong. Kudos to you on that. I hope you find your true calling and success in life. Life will definitely be easier for you from now on

@skygrapefruits 3 ай бұрын

It does not matter what other people have said about you, whether good or bad, as long as you are rooted in your truth. Everything will be better than in the past as long you move on to developing a healthy relationship with yourself and others. It is tough to be a public persona, so eating alone, enjoying life alone, and being at ease with yourself is okay.. mmm actually nothing wrong... many people do it in this big big world. You can't run away from yourself 24/7; you are your own best friend. Continue to take care of your inner world, Luv Luv! May good and wise friends come to you and continue to support your journey.

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

This is so wise! Thank you for being here ❤️

@Luthaniel83 3 ай бұрын

Wow i wish more people see this video ! It is not only about Sylvia's story and her saga (which i purely came here for at the start) but there are so many POWERFUL lessons we can learn for our own lives too ! Rooting for you Sylvia !

@jeang8493 4 ай бұрын

I love the vulnerable Sylvia and Dan, you are much more real and relatable now. Thank you for sharing your lessons as it will benefit many people out there who are still searching for themselves - young or old. I've shared this with my friends who needed to hear this.

@Venstaugon 4 ай бұрын

Thank you Sylvia and Dan for sharing so much! It really gave me another perspective on self healing and focusing on myself. You are such an inspirational person!

@zoneinfinite 4 ай бұрын

I had a narcissistic partner too, so I can totally relate. Lost all respect for her ex-husband after watching the first 2 videos. He played the victim card well over the years. Today we know he is the abuser, the manipulator, the classic toxic individual.

@DirtyMessyFree 4 ай бұрын

Big hugs to you for being a survivor ❤️

@leothebear4842 4 ай бұрын

Social media has become a facade that only shows one sided rosy pictures. Literally judging a book by its cover.. kudos to the genuine podcast!

@kendrickcan3919 4 ай бұрын

If my partner tells me that I cannot lock my phone or I must feel guilty for having a best friend, I will tell him to F off!

@DirtyMessyFree 4 ай бұрын

Boundaries! 💪🏼

@Dee-wb5go 4 ай бұрын

Love the honesty❤❤ thank you for this and opening up to the truth!!!

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

You are so welcome 🙏🏼

@sendwilson 4 ай бұрын

Your video resonated with me and reminded me of the importance of being true and honest with myself. Thanks Sylvia and Dan for distilling the painful experiences into bite-sized wisdom bombs such as redefining love and setting boundaries, which are very useful reminders. Keep up the great work! ❤

@khalovestyle 4 ай бұрын

I’m hook by this podcast is amazing, thank you for sharing the journey & self reflection. ❤

@DirtyMessyFree 4 ай бұрын

You are so welcome! 😍

@angiechong3160 3 ай бұрын

Such an amazing journey!! I have been following your journey Sylvia - so inspiring!! Your inner strength is beautiful ❤

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

Thank you so much!

@geekscreation7533 4 ай бұрын

i totally feel Dan when he talked about the 27 years friendship. the friend not showing up. it happened to me too! i was there for her during all her down times.. but that very one time when i needed her, she told me she was PLAYING MAHJONG and cannot leave. :( we were still friends for afew years after that, but then subsequently i just left that whole group because that incident had alrdy broke me.

@mousefatfat 4 ай бұрын

Same here. So, family is the most important for me. "Friendship" is too overrated. My best friend is the one who kept asking me out sincerely over the years and i truly appreciate it.

@allykoh6979 3 ай бұрын

My daughter had a very closed friend since kindergarten days and the friendships was at least 20 years. When my dad passed away, my daughter’s friend didn’t bother to come to the wake to console my daughter who had an extremely closed relationship with her grandfather. Her friend called in the middle of the wake, instead of checking where the wake was, she asked my daughter any good drinking pubs to recommend. My daughter was so shocked and felt very hurt by her friend. We are in this era now that everyone felt self entitled. Her friend could be thinking that it’s her right to decide where she wants to be whereas my daughter could be thinking that as good friend, the least she could do was to be with her during her grieving period. So, if you have a friend that goes the extra mile to do things for you, we know this is the type of friends we want to be with and cherish them. I am in my 50s now and have gone through so much in life to fully comprehend the Chinese saying, 君子之交淡如水。 In life, if we can have one very good friend, 夫复何求！

@YY_Mom 4 ай бұрын

Sylvia, I felt like tearing when you shared your heart sank at the right place … thank God for your healing journey… all that matters is your heart … ❤

@GraceChai-bg5no 4 ай бұрын

I followed you for years n saw how you had to take all the BS when the saga happened but I still trust you and I am so happy for you right now as you emerge stronger, better and more powerful and beautiful. Truly the better version of yourself.

@allykoh6979 3 ай бұрын

Dear Silvia, I felt compelled to write to you that it is ok to be alone. Only a strong woman is not afraid to be alone. Of course we all need friends in our life but one needs to be selective of friends. If it is just friends with benefits, then you know it’s better to be by yourself than wasting on people who do not deserve a minute of your time. True and genuine friends don’t come by easily, so when you know who your true friends are, you better cherish them. I sincerely hope you will emerge stronger after all the heart wrenching episodes you had to go through. Look at the brighter side that you had come out of the toxic relationship and you still have a full life ahead of you. You are young, beautiful and very capable. You can stand tall without any men. There are many people out there still stuck in a very abusive and toxic relationship but could not get out and perhaps also afraid to get out as they are afraid to be independent. It is definitely hell living with a narcissist and not being to get out. I wish you a life full of bliss and may you always be surrounded with kind hearted people. 🤗 ❤

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

Thank you Ally for this kind and heartfelt message! I feel your support! 🩷

@geneviealexis5493 3 ай бұрын

the but vase looks nice, thank you for sharing your story after hearing it, i found strength to keep going i wish u well and more blessings to come. Thank you to both of u and the rest of the team to make this podcast happen. update: finished the episode, happy about your relationship congratulations! He is really sweet to buy presents for two hahahaha its really nice 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

@DirtyMessyFree 2 ай бұрын

Thank you! You are so kind! 😍

@artcheryl 4 ай бұрын

I love this episode!! Omg I can't wait for the rest! One a week seems TOOO LONGGGGG 😭 Thanks Dan and Sylvia for making this show. And everyone else involved! The lighting is awesome, the set up is beautiful (it complements their clothes?! 😍 The details are amazing!), the edits are awesome. ❤️ And a huge thank you, Sylvia for sharing your story! I'm sure you knew the stories would resonate with people, but I honestly didn't expect that I'd resonate so much with so much that you shared today! Eg, being gaslit by your partner till you think you're choosing the "right" thing, how difficult it is to take stock of real relationships / friendships in your life and making new friends 😢 Your story provides so much hope in the possibility that some day, at the right time and place, we may be be able to find people who could be true friends, WHILE you are showing up as your true self instead of "performing" for people. Sending much love ♥️

@DirtyMessyFree 4 ай бұрын

Thank you unpacking with us and sharing your valuable deep reflections! ❤️ Let's do this sometimes dirty and messy life together!

@brendaatan2133 4 ай бұрын

Relatable. You deserve more. That is why we know is better to rely on ourselves.

@carollil 3 ай бұрын

Thank you Sylvia for sharing what many of us dont have the courage to and showing us it isn't easy being true to ourself while seeking people who will truly accept us for who we are without the charade and challenges for us to accept and be proud to be our true self as it is so tiring to pretend just so people like us. You look so much happier now and I am inspired by your transformation.

@gillsharinder 4 ай бұрын

She’s back! Better than Before! 🎉

@DirtyMessyFree 4 ай бұрын

Thank you for being a loving witness! ❤️

@libraries144 4 ай бұрын

I really want to hear more podcasts from sylvia again. I miss that podcast with nina last time

@nanablablaa9 4 ай бұрын

So happy to see you back Slyva! I’d say I’m neutral on this bc I still watch his content, but I just can’t stand the way he plays victim over almost everywhere. Paying for lawsuits and mental healths etc. Tbh all his insecurities are obviously bc you’re out of his league, hence he has to control this much.

@muuuaaachz1012 4 ай бұрын

I've truly enjoyed watching the podcast. It delves into so many layers, prompting deep reflection. It helped me realize that I may have been gaslighted at some point in my own relationship. However, acknowledging this doesn't absolve me of responsibility, as I played a role in allowing it to happen. What I'm most grateful for is the inner strength I've discovered on my healing journey. Without it, I could have fallen victim to further manipulation by my partner. While I don't believe he realized his behavior mirrored that of a narcissist, I'm grateful for my strength in recognizing and breaking free from unhealthy patterns. I've also come to acknowledge that I may have played the role of a villain in someone else's life. Whether from my perspective or theirs, both parties contribute to the narrative that unfolds. Ultimately, we must remain true to ourselves. Taking full responsibility for our mistakes allows us to forge a healthier path forward. It's futile to try to sustain a sinking ship by giving our best effort.

@valpal27 Ай бұрын

Finally found the time to watch all 8 episodes of this podcast, and I wanna say thank you, Sylvia and Dan, for sharing so openly and authentically❤️ This episode really hit home for me; it felt like a warm hug and was especially healing and comforting. As someone who has lost a lot of close friends in the last couple of years, I always wonder if things could have turned out differently if either party had responded differently. For those that I’ve let down, I always carry the guilt of not trying harder. For those that let me go, it was especially hard realizing that I wasn’t their priority, even though they were mine. But hearing your stories made me feel less alone. While I haven’t found my tribe yet, knowing that you found your people gives me hope that one day I will find mine too, just like you did🥺

@esther6052 4 ай бұрын

Hey Sylvia! So happy to see u back to screen. You are a great person. Jiayou! ❤

@hilmir 17 күн бұрын

your heart sinking into the right place is a feeling like finally returning and coming home to yourself. congratulations for that

@cherishchan1991 4 ай бұрын

Congratulations that you had walkout of everything and come out fresh and ready!! Love your true self. ❤ Jiayou!

@AK-pd3sq 4 ай бұрын

Thank you Sylvia. I can completely relate with your story and find your journey very inspiring. ❤

@slapyoknees2426 3 ай бұрын

the fact that you couldn't see that you deserve someone decent previously is really sad because you're intelligent (academically and at work), capable, kind at heart and the much better looking one in your previous relationship. i hope that one day, you'll find someone who can and will bring out the best in you and enrich your life! :)

@shaniasng6123 3 ай бұрын

🥲 I cried so badly... knowing how you feel... cause I had similar situation and i hv been pulling myself away from friends cz i was scarred as well... & i hv been trying to find back my old real self again. Jiayou! 🎉 Take ur time, u r doing really well! I love how confident & u being u again! ❤

@cooliolai 3 ай бұрын

Love love love this channel! Sylvia, listen gal, you did nothing but to see what is real or fake! Keep going, so happy u r back

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

Thank you so much! WE LOVE U ❤️

@michelleongwl2145 4 ай бұрын

Hey Slyvia, thank you so much for sharing what you've been through. Definitely people are gonna learn a lot from your podcast. Kudos and cant wait for more episode to be out! :)

@DirtyMessyFree 4 ай бұрын

You are so welcome! 😍

@joshua01 3 ай бұрын

I love the new perspective sylvia gives in this episode! Accepting responsibility of one’s own actions and mistakes!

@bridge_full_of_trolls 4 ай бұрын

This tell-all is very interesting! I never knew Ryan had problems getting it up

@user-xh2kw5eh1u 3 ай бұрын

When did she say

@RayMak 4 ай бұрын

Wowwwwwwwww...... It's always important to look at both sides.

@danielwong9488 4 ай бұрын

Sylvia, please take good care of yourself! I stand for you❤

@danielwong9488 4 ай бұрын

Quite obvious that your ex partner is narcissist, can tell from his social media posts too….

@danielwong9488 4 ай бұрын

So narcissist and entitled, cannot stand him! Donot know how you bear with him for so long…

@muack0 4 ай бұрын

Like strong woman is a threat to narcissistic man. The manipulation begins!!

@exploringapis4495 4 ай бұрын

In the Chinese podcast, he can’t stop talking abt himself. And always shading his past rs and indirectly shading Sylvia

@jonlks7394 4 ай бұрын

Agreed. Lets not forget that he openly admitted in the chinese podcast with mayiduo and jon chua that he had in fact been an obsessively controlling partner and it was completely glossed over. Guess the truth always comes to light. Never trust a man who makes a woman clean up his mess

@dontalktomebye 3 ай бұрын

Super obvious somemore he’s dating a xmm it’s so damn gross. He looks so acoustic also LOL

@fsheey 4 ай бұрын

these 4 stories are so important for everyone who choose to be part of real and non-manipulative relationships. building supportive circles > holding the one romantic relationship as sacred. thank u both for sharing and distilling the lessons. can't wait for the following episodes 🩵

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

Absolutely!! 😍

@kwcdude 4 ай бұрын

Thank you Sylvia & Dan for sharing your amazing stories! I am so happy for u Sylvia for being able to break free from the 'prison' that u r chained to, and, just like the channel name, being in a dirty n messy situation and being able to break free and soar higher den b4! Jiayou & next week couldnt come any quicker! ♥

@shuenstalk 4 ай бұрын

This podcast shouts positivity!!!❤❤ such big love to it!! And hope everything goes well and more ppl will be healed from their trauma ✨

@htfucustoms 4 ай бұрын

LUV THIS TWO HUMAN BEING!

@susan_8699 4 ай бұрын

after all the saga and drama, i just want to say Syl is so so strong! i think we dont have to judge the saga since every story have own side of POV! hope she's back with the real her, all with positivity

@elizayeo3294 3 ай бұрын

So happy you dropped 2 episodes which was just the right dose for us to finally get an update of you. After episode 1, I thought I had to wait for a while LOL. I think this new channel is so comforting for so many of us, because it's not just another "'lets talk about it" style and that's it, move on. It unpacks alot of sitting with ourselves to examine our actions, our thought process and even mistakes. Had been low key rooting and waiting for Sylvia to come back strong from the saga. Just my POV, Sylvia is classic first child eldest daughter energy - has to take on alot of burden. Your ex has victim and martyr complex, wahhh~ I wanted to say this for sooo long after watching his interview in the Chinese channel. Anw, this video is also so healing for me, a joy to watch and thank you great team with Danny! Already love Dan from LITO, perfect combination, looking forward to more.

@princesssupernova5300 3 ай бұрын

coming from someone who had always believed in you, seeing you active online makes me so happy

@RavenCloudNine 3 ай бұрын

This is how a girl's platonic guy best friend should do, to maintain a good relationship with the girl. 1. Be friends with her partner, and maintain a good relationship with her partner. 2. Do her a favour by reducing the 1:1 frequencies, to greatly reduce potential misunderstanding. This is an unspoken bro code. However, it sounded like Nick expected no change to his time spent with Sylvia. Guy best friend's actions and expectations were actually disrespectful towards the ex-partner. And from the stories, i can also see why the ex-partner is angry in all the situation. Both parties are viewing the same situation from very different angle. Both are right and wrong at the same time, for very diffferent reasons. The issue seems to be communiation breakdown more than anything. Both were unable to articulate their points in a way that the other could understand. Both were really young when all these happened. And they didn’t have someone in their circle who could help them understand each other's pov (no doubt, not many people have this skillset). Both didn't have have anyone(religion, parents, relatives, friends, counsellors, etc) that they truly trust and can rely on, in guiding them how to handle marraige life. Marraige life is already super tough. Add the fact that they are working together complicates the situation even more.

@cheeyonglow5925 3 ай бұрын

Sylvia 你回来了！你真的好棒，经过那么多风风雨雨, you comeback stronger and happier now. Very proud of you , 你熬过来了。

@september_29 3 ай бұрын

Thank you Sylvia for being so open and vulnerable for sharing your stories in your past relationships. You have come such a long way and suffered so much. 😢 I remembered I was also going through a seemingly peaceful but painful divorce at the same time as yours. And I have yet to go for any therapy session for this as I was ashamed of it and did not feel the need for it. A lot of emotions and pain surfaced through while watching your stories. I also realized that we have forgotten that the most important relationship in our Life is ourselves. I am really happy to see that you are so much more in peace and grounded with yourself. Thank you for letting us in into your Life and I can't wait to hear more from you. 🩷

@mandy9684 3 ай бұрын

Came back from the live huddle on ig and decided to comment because this is content I hope to see in singapore that's localised! I cried watching both episodes. Thank you for sharing your vulnerabilities and journey because the pain, hurt and loss made it relatable. I've been struggling to find my own tribe for a while now and this came at a timely moment. I'm also trying to find my place and am turning 30 this year, I have self-doubt too and sometimes don't know what I can do but my goal lately has been to imbue and empower myself with things internally that can't be taken away from me. To me, that's what made your sharing so powerful, because you've equipped yourself with things internally that can't be taken away from you. I admire your courage, strength and resilience because it must not have been easy. You can't grow without having been through shit and navigating through the mess, some lessons cannot be taught, it has to be lived through. Sending love and I honestly can't wait to hear more, take in the lessons and learnings and cry together with both of you. ❤

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

HELLO! 👋🏼 Thank you for this kind, insightful sharing!!!

@jadelioralau4782 3 ай бұрын

extremely relatable.. im out of the relationship but toxic ex still owes me my life savings but he makes me feel bad for trying get back what’s mine

@summerflutter 3 ай бұрын

listening to all 4 stories, at the surface level they sounded like reasonable requests from a spouse actually, 1) overly close relationship with the opposite gender, 2) airing dirty laundry to third parties, 3) this is the only one which was too much 4) i can understand why a partner would do this...but combining everything else she mentioned e.g. phone privacy, guilt tripping, leaving her to be the bad guy and do the dirty jobs, yea insecure and conrolling behaviour foshure. their personalities just werent compatible, she's so independent and needs a secure partner who can let her fly. and yes there are also girls who don't mind and can pander to their controlling behaviour. well both of them moved on, good for them!

@user-mn3xy2vl8i 4 ай бұрын

My parents underwent a divorce during my A level days prior to the army. I almost broke, my life was a mess, and my long-time church friends did not even ask if I was alright. For years, I kept questioning if I made the wrong choice to walk away and my life was really at a low. I can totally relate to your story here.

@user-mn3xy2vl8i 4 ай бұрын

But at the same time, I think back at those time where I may not have been a true friend, I really felt I didn't have the capacity to be as I was having a hard time in life at that point in time. Just couldn't gather that right frame of mind

@DirtyMessyFree 4 ай бұрын

There are days when we thrive and sometimes, we just have to survive. Big hugs ❤️

@winstontwh 4 ай бұрын

Hey Syl, I wanted to take some time to say I’m just done with your first podcast episode - I sat through the full 1.5 hours of it 👁️👁️ … gearing up for episode 2. and first off, super proud of you to be braving the media and doing this. This is a beautiful piece of work and I’ve always wanted you back in this space - you’re meant for it. You speaking out in this does so much for people, and I don’t know if you know this enough. While I wasn’t with you from the very start, I did witness the fall of one of the greatest content hubs of all time in SG. You did what you could with your two hands and we had the best run. I wouldn’t take back any moment of it, and I’ve said this before, but I always gotcha back! Genuinely elated for your success, everything great that is coming your way, and most importantly, your happiness 😃 it shows ❤️

@DirtyMessyFree 4 ай бұрын

This means so much to me ❤️ Thank you for being a part of my old world & for fire fighting during the company's toughest times. THANK YOU for your love, your support & for just being an awesome and kind human being everyday that I know you. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you, and the compassionate group of people just like you during my hardest times. I love you from the bottom of my heart! ❤️

@jenniferflorence8503 4 ай бұрын

Thank you Sylvia and Dan for this podcast. I’m very happy that you found your true self Sylvia! Whatever you do, I hope that you are happy and continue to bring joy to the people around you. Thank you for giving hopes for everyone out here to get back up and to not give up on ourself. I cannot wait to see what you will do next Sylvia in this very important chapter of your life. Once again, thank you for coming back.

@DirtyMessyFree 4 ай бұрын

Us too! THANK YOU for being here with me on the next part of my journey ❤️

@jasmineyeo9697 3 ай бұрын

❤❤ Sending lots of love for Sylvia ❤❤ And Coach Daniel Lim! I cried on the first part of Sylvia sharing her losing all her support side 😢 It’s must been so lonely and hard… I’m proud of u for walking out of it. It’s not easy at all. I hope all the happiness and love for you moving forward! ❤❤❤ You grown so much! 💕💕

@jeremychase8363 3 ай бұрын

Honestly, the best best best podcast ever. TBH, I've never hear any podcast before. But I sat through the entire 2 videos. We speak the same language and I am also literally saying yess yess yess each time you guys share your thoughts. Amazing! I love these kind of conversations.

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

Wow, thank you!

@Huhwhoskx 3 ай бұрын

Always on ur side!!

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

You are an amazing human being 🥰

@WendyTHY 4 ай бұрын

WE ALL NEED A CARMEN IN LIFE ❤🤩 P/S: can we have a counter for the number of times Sylvia said yes 😆😂

@kendrickcan3919 4 ай бұрын

Wah. Didn't know that this Ryan is such a control freak. Lose respect for him.

@kikkobaby 3 ай бұрын

Dear Dan and Sylvia, your coming together in this podcast feels like a gift from the universe(or guan yi mama) itself. As someone who tends to be more introverted and reserved and possibly residing in a cave, I hadn't heard of this significant incident before stumbling upon this episode. The revelations shared here have opened my eyes to the depths of human cruelty, and it's chilling to realise that I have navigated similar situations in the past. Even now, years later, the mental, physical and emotional scars of those experiences still linger, casting shadows on my journey toward healing.. and sometimes I move away from healing, and it gets really difficult. Yet, hearing your stories has made this path and life feel less solitary, reminding me that amidst the darkness, hope remains to be found. It has been such a lonely journey for me, and I’ve always felt alone and unable to be understood. Sylvia, your courage to lay bare your vulnerabilities, strengths, and authenticity resonated deeply with me and countless others. Your journey serves as a powerful testament to the resilience of the human spirit. Through your words, you've illuminated the way forward for those of us who have stumbled in the dark, showing us that even amidst life's trials(pun not intended), a flicker of light beckons us onward, even though we really believe that we’ve ran out of moves. Thank you for bravely sharing your narrative, for reminding us all that our struggles do not define us, and that within each of us lies the strength to rise again. Your impact reaches far beyond the confines of this podcast, infusing hope and healing into every corner it touches, and anyone who is willing to receive it. And to Master Coach Lin Xian Gu Dan, your guidance and support have undoubtedly played a pivotal role in Sylvia's journey. Your commitment to lifting others up and fostering growth will always be an inspiration to me. Together, you both remind me that even in our darkest hours, we are never truly alone, and I’m so glad kindred spirits met! May your light continue to shine brightly, illuminating the path for others to follow. The world is undoubtedly brighter with both of you in it! Jiayou and take care, wishing nothing but the best for everyone watching and reading.

@TheDisneyfairytale 3 ай бұрын

I'm sorry but Dan is such a yapper. Goes on and on and on. Would enjoy the podcast much more if it's just Sylvia speaking

@NmxTiffany 3 ай бұрын

Tbh I miss TTS

@freeagentnetwork 4 ай бұрын

Move on, People! Change and Healing is a long process….always be humble….❤

@mysticery 4 ай бұрын

Top question. Will Ryan be cancelled?

@FinalSpace 3 ай бұрын

Cancel culture is disgusting, stop it 👎

@nudgedoink55 2 ай бұрын

Halfway through the video after the 4 stories. Yes this is typical of someone who is insecure. But as someone who is insecure myself, I can somewhat relate to why Ryan acted in this manner. He was not trying to manipulate, but he was overthinking every single thing you did because he needs the validation that you love him. As soon as you show someone else attention, he is afraid that he would lose you. Im not saying that what he did was right. He was not ready to love someone else, because he did not love himself first.

@jimmychengjitming6953 3 ай бұрын

Dan and Sylvia, well done with this show. Happy to see Sylvia be her ownself and has moved on from the saga. Sylvia v2 is kicking ass!

@yiminchen1988 4 ай бұрын

Grand shake out 👏

@DirtyMessyFree 4 ай бұрын

The best 😍

@Kath5672 4 ай бұрын

Hi syl! So happy that you are back to screen! You are different from previously and so proud of you! Jiayou!! just to tell you that i always roll eyes when your ex "suan xiao " you in his video. Cz real man don’t do that .

@MellowWell0w 4 ай бұрын

Tbh since the saga, I’ve avoided any videos that he’s a part of. He disgusts me. I just cannot. Cannot give him more views and “money”.

@phia8723 4 ай бұрын

Wow totally agree with this. I even blocked his ad that always appeared. I scare kena scam sia. A good boss must starts from home, treat your family good first then you can be a successful person. No matter how i angry with my partner, i will never say bad things or betray my partner. Honestly if my girl together with this kind of guy, i will totally not agree.

@davabyfoeth9706 4 ай бұрын

HAHAHA WHY DID I ONLY THINK I WAS THE ONLY ONE? HIGH FIVE @@phia8723

@jerra_ng 3 ай бұрын

I will skip any video with that watermelon in it.

@yangtzeling7468 3 ай бұрын

Dislike Dan’s free use of Fs and his loud drama banal response. Just let Sylvia speak lah OMG !

@Shark33Pistol 3 ай бұрын

Question of the day, how many yeses are there??

@melinda9207 4 ай бұрын

This podcast idea is amazing and good.. the stuff that sylvia share is happening so much more often especially in adulthood and it makes one think through or at least for me it did get my thinking about some stuff.. i myself have also just been through shit ending of 2023 and a rocky start to 2024 but i am slowly getting myself out and this series is helping so much

@Lia-tn3hk 3 ай бұрын

Can we have more episodes ?❤ it was good

@user-lx1cp8ig7y 3 ай бұрын

All the truth come out. Stay far away from them.

@derrickcsh 3 ай бұрын

Major OCD controlling a person till like no return sia! When we get into a relationship be it partner or friend, we need to give and take compromise towards each other to have healthy relationship. When we committed into a wrong one, the life really go downward spiral. These stories you share should help people to get the courage to come out of any toxic relationship. Great podcast by both you and daniel! :)

@saltandlightofficial 2 ай бұрын

What is this retreat thing? Can anyone join

@yimingjiang6657 3 ай бұрын

I rarely ever comment on any youtube videos, but I really admire and respect you Sylvia! A long time fan of NOC and You! I'm wanna book a coaching session with you soon!

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

Wow, thank you! 😍

@Aaron-de8ky 4 ай бұрын

Call a spade a spade. She’s back to social media to promote her life coaching

@dontalktomebye 3 ай бұрын

And?

@sunlightdavid 3 ай бұрын

I mean, at least she's entertaining many along the way. Or you want to see a 30s ad about how your life needs coaching lol

@Lithium_GI 3 ай бұрын

And you gay....@@dontalktomebye

@estherong 3 ай бұрын

Very heartfelt 😢😢😢

@annew5380 3 ай бұрын

Dunno who's right or who's wrong in the whole saga. Not taking sides also because it's none of my business. Only people who are involved would know best or have a clearer understanding of what happened. Hopefully all parties gained a deeper understanding of life and their own flaws and work towards a better version of themselves. Doesn't that apply to all of us? It's just how life is supposed to be, a series of lessons, if we allow ourselves to properly process what we go through.

@Tomphua 4 ай бұрын

How come still no news of this podcast on Mothership?

@Deloowix 4 ай бұрын

Too long lol. They haven’t even finished watching.

@michalphang 4 ай бұрын

Hahaha got already!

@FMLTTM 4 ай бұрын

Correct? Correct? Correct?

@Whitecloudsss Ай бұрын

Wow, Carmen is such a lovely person. So precious.

@DirtyMessyFree Ай бұрын

💯😍

@couchpotatoeie6039 3 ай бұрын

❤ i feel so, so much for you. you’re so strong & i support you forever

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

I appreciate you, fellow kind soul ♥️ Let's do life together to the best of our abilities!

@PAINTITBLACKGAMING 3 ай бұрын

At 1:01:20 for almost 1 whole minute he's just narrating SOMEONE ELSE'S STORY when she's trying to share it herself

@LC212689 4 ай бұрын

The mic is too good, too much guttural/saliva noises from Sylvia.

@dbskluvu 3 ай бұрын

omg i thought i was the only one annoyed by it. I had to lower the volume for that... she make some weird sound like "kuk.. kerk.." ._.

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

Thank you for bringing this to our attention! 😍

@internationalsunshine 3 ай бұрын

I like this type of podcast from Sylvia, but i feel Daniel can tone down a little. His sudden hype up after Sylvia every sentence just feels very off rhythm to the flow of the podcast.

@mkz3616 4 ай бұрын

Tbh Sylvia took a long hiatus and went through the needful legal procedures, I felt like the social media trial really needs to end now. She has taken enough accountability on her end. Whatever is her perspective on her relationship, marriage, and through the saga is hers and her feelings are equally valid.

@internationalsunshine 3 ай бұрын

I had similarl relationship experience with her, and eventually her cheated on me. It took me years to get over my ex. But now that I am totally over that relationship, i always thank god that my ex cheated and dumped me. Because at that point in time, we even talked about marriage. If we really got married, I would still be trapped and miserable, thinking that I was in love when I was just in pain. A break up with someone who is not compatible with you is really the best outcome for everyone and most importantly yourself.

@DirtyMessyFree 3 ай бұрын

Sending you so much love ❤️

@bestofluck3302 3 ай бұрын

Take a shot when you hear the word "Yes" 🙋‍♂🍻

@fairyz 4 ай бұрын

Thats why Sylvia’s ex partner is so happy with his current gf - cause she cooks for him, apologizes to him and gives in to him. At least that’s all that i am getting from him whenever he is questioned about what he likes about his current gf. He gives off the feeling where he thinks that he is smarter than his current gf and only marrying her because she is forcing him into it coz he doesn’t believe in marriage. His ideal girl is someone who serves him, give in to him and believe that everything he say/think is right. Total narcissist behaviour.

@ongtw89 4 ай бұрын

god bless cherylene

@Missy_Ai 4 ай бұрын

@@ongtw89 Should be may God saves Cherylene

@dontalktomebye 3 ай бұрын

Hahaha she’s such a XMM. So blind and stupid to like an acoustic guy like R.

@luxury-Diver 3 ай бұрын

Wait till the girl wakes up

@sunlightdavid 3 ай бұрын

maybe it's MCP, maybe he's the type of dude that like meek women in a traditional, conservative, 80/90s manner lol