I’d like to know a bit about the healthy side of narcissism, how much each person needs before it turns problematic.

In psychotherapy, at a certain point, some clients ask if it is wise for them to give up their narcissism. They give examples of people getting things in life and achieving more by simply believing that they deserve good things in life, not necessarily giving back value for the reward. What can we tell them in defence of the life in which they are being more humble?

As the discussion about narcissism and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) continues to grow in popular media, so too does awareness of the concept of covert narcissism. While the classic image of a narcissist is often that of an overtly grandiose and attention-seeking individual, covert narcissists are much more subtle in their behaviors and tendencies. Covert narcissism is characterized by a strong sense of entitlement, a lack of empathy for others, and a need for admiration and validation. However, unlike their overt counterparts, covert narcissists may appear to be humble, self-effacing, and even altruistic on the surface. They may use passive-aggressive tactics to get their way, manipulate others behind the scenes, and present a false image of themselves as kind and caring individuals. For example, David Foster Wallace discusses how self-hatred can be a form of narcissism. He explains that when we hate ourselves, we are still very focused on ourselves and our own flaws. This self-absorption and preoccupation with our own negative qualities is actually a form of self-centeredness, which is a defining characteristic of narcissism. Could you please provide further explanation on this topic and clarify the level of significance that clinicians and researchers attribute to this concept?

A few to pick from, maybe more than one if you like: (1) can we explore some of the more common familial manifestations of this issue that seem to crop up with some regularly in your clinical practice? For example: Freud’s classical “shut in” family type versus other emerging forms; the topic of group pathogenesis, the process of intergenerational transmission and "reaction-types" within a given family, their collective prognosis, members' regressions into psychopathy or antisocial behavior, etc. (2) in terms of diagnosis, are there any useful or practical differentials you’d like to share with us? maybe in terms of say, a primary aggression versus a secondary aggression patient? where can one expect to be surprised in this area? (3) (if you have the fortitude) would you care to explore the connection with what has been called in France: “Perverse Narcissism” and its relation to various sexual practices: ex. legal versus illegal, when seen in males versus females, etc.? Are there any resounding takeaways relating to this specific exploration of narcissistic sexuality for you? Appreciated, Ryan

What do you think of the recent trend in social media with 100s, perhaps 1000s, of videos and podcasts on "how to deal with 'narcsissts'" or "how to outsmart a narcissist". How can we understand this trend psychoanalytically and why there is such a need to characterise narcissists as 'malignant', 'subhuman', almost evil people that we need to avoid at all costs.

1/ How can we define narcissism psychoanalytically these days when there’s an increase of the use of the word in everyday language to describe a wide range of behaviors? 2/ If part of self-regulation means saying no to yourself…how can one develop self-regulation in a culture that promotes narcissism?

Interested in trend of society to be about i focus on me you focus on you. With less emphasis of responsibility to one another like trends for less of family bond and more of hyper self reliance as a societal value