Loving Your Spouse When It's Hard to Like Them

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Loving Your Spouse When It's Hard to Like Them | Dave and Ashley Willis

Рет қаралды 35,696

3 жыл бұрын

A healthy marriage requires two people who choose to love each other even on those days when it's difficult to like each other. In this episode, Dave and Ashley share ways to build intimacy and connection in your marriage even when you're feeling disconnected or distant from each other.
Check out Dave and Ashley's NEW book here - www.amazon.com...
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A podcast dedicated to undressing the truth about sex, intimacy and lifelong love. The concerns and questions most couples have in marriage often go unspoken, until now. Hosts Dave and Ashley Willis bring wisdom, vulnerability, and humor to even the toughest marriage topics. Together they have built a strong following, reaching millions of married couples through their blogs, books, and videos. They have four young sons and live near Dallas, TX.
XO Marriage exists to help couples have a healthy and strong marriage. We do this by hosting conferences, creating resources, and offering encouraging digital content. Our world-class speakers offer leading marriage advice to equip couples with the necessary tools for a successful marriage. We believe that every marriage can thrive.

Пікірлер: 52

@AB-gn8qs 2 жыл бұрын

I love the way Dave is looking at Ashley for the first minute of this video😍

@UnAshamed2010 3 жыл бұрын

We’ve really been dealing with this a lot lately - I get moody and easily stressed out and he’s a lot more even keel. We work it out by talking about it, even though it’s hard. One of our policies with each other has been to always be honest, even if it hurts. 🥺 ♥️

@shamillab.4219 3 жыл бұрын

That's Awesome ❤

@renitabonnerpetit5765 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you both for Sharing, I’m single but preparing for marriage in my Future 🌹👑🌹💯💯💯🎯☝🏾💕💕💕☝🏾🙇🏾‍♀️

@peggysloma8412 2 жыл бұрын

Listening to this topic is so comforting. The same feelings with caregiving your spouse. My husband and I are newly wed seniors of only 6 months. He just had back surgery and now I'm caring for him. Sometime it takes all day to clean up after breakfast. Praying for grace and strength to help with his recovery. Thank you for talking about the demands on our life and honoring our commitment and love for our spouse.

@Smjourney1223 3 жыл бұрын

Your podcast helps my marriage and other relationships in general. It’s so important to mention even Jesus got angry. Feel anger but avoid sin. Thank you for sharing your experience. 🙏💕🙏

@judegary2766 3 жыл бұрын

Pro trick: you can watch movies on flixzone. I've been using them for watching loads of movies recently.

@braylonleon8257 3 жыл бұрын

@Jude Gary Yup, been watching on flixzone} for months myself :)

@mackalfonso7423 3 жыл бұрын

@Jude Gary definitely, have been using flixzone} for months myself =)

@dijhaallen 3 жыл бұрын

I absolutely love you guys! Thank you for all you do. Peace and blessings!

@nataliasolakian6717 3 жыл бұрын

What is the difference between normal anger and just a constant disgruntled attitude?

@mode200 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you guys we all are blessed by your podcast and now videos. It's hard 4 sure with a new born and a toddler, the tiredness is affecting my marriage and I dnt know now how to be nice to my spouse cuz everything irritates me and no quiet time I so want. May our Good Lord Jesus keeps on blessing your family and ministry ♥️

@ggrace1133 2 жыл бұрын

Wait, what? You don’t know how to be nice to your spouse? No matter how tired you are, you already know how to be nice-you learned it in Kindergarten. I’ve been there-exhausted beyond sanity. Decide every half hour that you are capable of grace, not grouchiness. Deep breaths. The extra oxygen really does help. You can do this. “Always be humble and kind.”

@rechelefields3224 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for taking on these gritty topics.

@MrJroc3307 3 жыл бұрын

I've loved my wife when it's hard and got nowhere! We've been separated for 4-5 months now and as bad as I want my marriage with her I don't know if it'll be restored! It's very frustrating and every day my hope gets lower and lower. Fighting for marriage is harder than people say it is!

@heatherdillon381 3 жыл бұрын

Agreed! It takes two (with God in the middle) & both 'being intentional.' A great book (available in audio-book also) is "Friends, Partners, Lovers" by Kevin Thompson (a pastor). Simply truths. It takes two to make a marriage & only one to break it. I was praying & believing my marriage would be restored, but later discovered, my 'Christian' husband wasn't. Breaking marriage covenant grieves God, & it should grieve us too!

@rebekahkenyon1302 3 жыл бұрын

😢praying for your marriage. The devil is working hard. I pray you will keep trying. Show her your there no matter what. I know that is not easy anf it may take time and you cant change her heart only God can. Keep praying and God can move mountains!

@MrJroc3307 3 жыл бұрын

@@rebekahkenyon1302 thanks. It's hard and what makes it worse is when I go to see them and my 3 yrs that doesn't understand keep asking why am I leaving her every night🥺 my 12 yr old tries to stay positive and always says it'll get better. She wants me there but knows it's not her choice. I'm praying things turn around!!

@MrJroc3307 3 жыл бұрын

@@heatherdillon381 but the thing with mine is she probably want our marriage but I think some advice from divorce or non married people played a part. Not completely but enough to cloud her judgment. I still love her with everything in me and as bad I wanna give up my love for her wint let me!

@EL3VENSVOID 3 жыл бұрын

My wife and I seperated after 22 years together. I hit a midlife crisis and left. Then she started sleeping with my friend. I definitely wasn’t innocent as I was doing the same thing. The Lord restored us. She told me over and over I don’t want back with you but hen she asked me to move back in and sleep in the guest room. Then got invited back into the bedroom. After 2 months we were back together. Now we are stronger then ever and moved to Panama City Beach. God is good

@nataliasolakian6717 3 жыл бұрын

How do you show love to your husband when he is angry?

@hineata100 3 жыл бұрын

Struggling with this myself Natalia...hope someone can give us an answer.

@xaviermercado2079 3 жыл бұрын

I love your information of your topics. I find so much knowledge and value of each partner. I need this kind of support for a great marriage to stay strong in love.

@AmaeTalingting 3 жыл бұрын

This is so amazing! Thank you

@LovingtotheMacks 3 жыл бұрын

Really interesting topics. Great video. We dealt with similar issues minus children as we haven't had any as yet. Thanks for sharing. Balance is extremely important. Loving Your Spouse according to 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 is key

@liufox4394 3 жыл бұрын

Excellent video content! Forgive me for chiming in, I would love your opinion. Have you ever tried - Millawdon Varied Nights Trick (do a search on google)? It is an awesome one off guide for learning intimate questions to make your relationship stronger without the headache. Ive heard some incredible things about it and my friend after a lifetime of fighting got excellent results with it.

@gerushareddy3163 2 жыл бұрын

Dave Ur so Sweet 🥹 n I love 💕 ur humor n vulnerability n U too Dear Ashley .i had post partum depression n still struggle with bipolar…n My Hubby has tried to Love 💗 n support me thru all that…he keeps trying…He gives up at times(feeling despondent…)

@bethcase5800 2 жыл бұрын

I have told my husband before I love you but not always like you. He gets this because he feels the same sometimes.

@SnookOnTheFly 3 жыл бұрын

According to our marriage counselor my wife and father in law have an enmeshed relationship with narcissistic tendencies. Their relationship comes before ours and I’m their third wheel. The things I’ve had to witness and things I’ve been on the receiving end of; I never thought I’d be a part of in marriage. I’m nothing more than a tool. There is no intimacy on any level because it threatens their fragile relationship. He is the narcissist one and does everything he can to make sure she stays his and you can see the struggle in her. I honor the vows of my marriage and have no intention to do anything but love my wife with this sickness. After 14 years, so far, my “love tank” is empty and Putting G-d first in my life is the only way I can explain the continued love I’m able to give my wife, but it’s taking its toll on me and our family.

@SnookOnTheFly 3 жыл бұрын

@@passionforhispeace1194 me setting boundaries starts ww3 and it gets ramped up. They’re on the phone several times a day. We can live thousands of miles apart and still be stuck in the same house. No matter how many counselors or pastors say it’s too much; it doesn’t matter. I’m the enemy taking him out of our life. The areas I’m taking him out of she’s been told was never his spot to be in, but it doesn’t matter. She’s under his spell. 😞

@SnookOnTheFly 3 жыл бұрын

@@passionforhispeace1194 I’ll give it a read thanks

@MsAtieno 3 жыл бұрын

Praying for you, now i know your story may God restore you both and heal you too

@bernadinevanwyk679 3 жыл бұрын

Don't know how to overcome the betrayal of my spouse with family member. I did forgive but the trust is gone. And can't look at him the same way anymore.

@jewellusher3636 Жыл бұрын

How about Facebook! I lost my hubby to Facebook and I was the one who talked him into it 😕

@RuthanneR1 Жыл бұрын

Around minute 18:00, what do you do when your spouse mocks the truth that is lovingly given and then continues in the offensive/unbiblical behavior?

@margotaylor6157 3 жыл бұрын

U guys are Awesome!!! Thank u

@jessyjonas4988 2 жыл бұрын

LOVE IS HONEST Amen

@solascriptura9988 3 жыл бұрын

I NEED PRAYER. I’ve been married for 3 years. My wife had a child at 3 months when we met. His bio dad abandoned my wife and son. My son is turning 4 in a few weeks and all of the sudden bio dad shows back up wanting to be apart of his live. My wife wants this to happen where I am reserved for these reasons... 1. He had a violent past threatening her and his life if she had the baby 2. When he did return he has already said inappropriate things to my wife sexually. 3. My wife said she has “feelings” for him but doesn’t want to leave our married. Old stuff coming up I guess. 4. My gut says this isnt good and it’s way to fast for his bio dad to meet him when my wife says it’s his right. (I believe he gave that right up) Needless to say this has caused MAJOR issues including he making decisions without my say. I dont know what to do. We both are believers but I’m afraid for my son and my marriage. 😢

@xXKingReptarXx 3 жыл бұрын

Sola Scriptura I hear you bro, you have my prayers

@reneedwards1082 2 жыл бұрын

🙏🙏🙏🙏 trust in God cause His way is the right way

@renitabonnerpetit5765 3 жыл бұрын

Come on and tell the truth about how the Bible talks about marriage, putting the WORD on it👫🤔👀💯💯💯💯

@jesusiscomingsoon- 3 жыл бұрын

What to do if your husband blatantly says he doesn't want you but he does want strangers on he internet?

@brendasutton8116 3 жыл бұрын

bravo man, you need to let your wife go because she deserves someone who can truly love and desire her. Others out there see her as beautiful. You should have never married her in the first place. If you do love her then you need to be completely faithful to her and get rid of the porn. You are cheating on her as well as cheating her of real love.

@brendasutton8116 3 жыл бұрын

Michelle shuffler, you need to walk away from this marriage because you deserve better. If he doesn’t want you but he wants strangers he is cheating on you, even if it is only in his mind. He’s giving himself to others but not you. He has broken his vows to you and God so you are biblically free to leave this marriage. Now, that said, if he truly loves you and you love him and you both want to stay in the marriage, then seek out a recovery program for addicts. Because he has an addiction to porn. You need to go too because you are co-dependent to his behavior. I know it hurts. Celebrate Recovery is a good program if you can find it in your area. It will be associated with a church as it is a Christian program akin to AA. Please seek help for yourself even if he doesn’t go. I recommend this BEFORE ending the marriage so that you can heal and understand exactly what’s going on and that his behavior is NOT YOUR FAULT! God bless you.

@jesusiscomingsoon- 3 жыл бұрын

@@brendasutton8116 thanks