I have no friends at 34. It's hard to make friends at this age and in these times. I've been a loner since high school. Would be nice to have a support system and not having to rely solely on myself

Problem is when you’ve basically got no friends. It’s real hard especially even without money … life sucks

Great advice!!! I’m 39 and single with no kids or friends. There are times when I enjoy alone time because I am introverted, however, it would be nice to develop meaningful relationships with others. I definitely need to work on changing my mindset about people because I do have trust issues and can be cynical about life!!! Thanks for the video💛🧡💜

I made the wrong choices with friends when I was younger, now I find myself without a single friend at age 36. I have a partner and been blessed with a beautiful daughter, my dog is my best friend. It actually hurts on a deep level. Who would I invite to our wedding? Who’s going to be my best man? I’ve had a shitty week and want to have a beer with a mate? I’ve also noticed my “dickhead” meter is super quick to judge people these days, as soon as someone shows traits I don’t like I cut them off instantly. I know there’s people out there who would be great friends, finding them is the hard part.

People get so competitive and judgmental with age, and bragging... seems like it's the new way of escaping your miserable life. I had to cut off some people. Or people simply forget you. Why that?! I have no kids, not married, I don't even see the point. Most of people after 30 are only focused on kids activities which is to me very annoying... seems like they don't want to have fun anymore, let it go... Also for me to go out in a bar simply and being surrounded by younger prettier people kind of depresses me... I don't look particularly young. I think you're right, the focus should be on sharing an activity together not talking about how much you make, how much you pay or paid for this and that etc... who cares? when you see friends and you go home bored this is not a good sign. We should allow ourselves to be lighter and more carefree, just like you said I realize I am not generative at all lol. Since I work from home for years and worry a lot, I became very isolated... I need to do my homework !

Very great advise!my long time best friend doesn't seem to care anymore,I guess I have do some homework and find a new good friend

Great tips, especially the one to invite to something specific upfront!

I'm 33 recently separated but on the way to a divorce. Lost my best friend in 2017 due to a seizure. Right now it's just me and my cat and 5 year old daughter every other weekend. I'm trying to make friends but no one wants to hang out. I've tried getting back in the dating scene but no luck either. And over the year when I did have friends I would just get done wrong. So now it's hard for me to trust people

I moved a lot as a student and young professional... Now in my mid-30s, as a childfree by choice woman, I find it very difficult to find new friends. Seems like everybody has their head stuck in dirty diapers. I understand that we all now have busy schedules, some because of their jobs, some other because of their kids. However, I have also noticed that parents tend to forget their other interests they had before and, some of them, don't even want them back. Odd :(

watching this as a 15 y/o to help my mother

I have people I enjoy being around when I want to party but I want people I can enjoy while being regular. Now a days people want to come over after 9pm, they have kids, smoke weed, no car no job no place. I’m in my 30s and it’s really a stress to find one person I can travel with go to dinners etc.

This is a really a helpful video. Maybe for once in my 34 years of living, I'll actually have a friend. (No this isn't an exaggeration, I've spent over 3 decades with absolutely no friends and it has taken a toll on me. I'm 34 but look like I'm in my 50s)

I’m almost 45, single, socially awkward and anxious, less-abled due to pain and fatigue, a true introvert, child-free by choice in a conservative country where the general population is very young as well - I feel so old and odd, and lonely. 😢

Thanks for the video. I'm 50 with no real friends. I can spend many hours alone without caring that much but I'm lonely. It can be hard to make conversation; I think that's an introvert thing. The bit about interests was eye-opening. I'd always just thought about the cliched, "let's go for a coffee" type of thing. The dilemma is finding common interests with people I don't know all that well.

1. Generative - you stopped being generative and started to become passive and it reduces the amount off ppl you have in your life 2. Focus on interests - we keep trying to focus on social skills instead of our interests. Pick a couple things to focus on like a new hobby or an instrument or activity. Friends are a bi-product 3. Invite, don’t ask. Rather than ask to hang out, invite them to something. “Would you like to come with me, I’m hosting ______ or I’m joining a class for ________” 4. Create a triad. Get together with 2 other ppl that know each other and know you then you can all get together at different times. You have a group of friends rather than a bunch of friends that don’t know each other.

Recently divorced .. lost all mutual friends ...

Just crossed the 30 mark and I am surprised it isn’t just me feeling like this. great content.

I have no friends any more at age 32 after my best friend passed away kind of became a loner.

I'm 30 and don't have one friend because I cut all my old ones off their toxic they weren't really friends so now I have trust issues and depression but trying to overcome it. I don't do social media as well

Thanks for being straight up with good information. Great tips. Thank you.

Thank you for this! Very helpful 🙌

Well, I'm certainly glad this popped up in my YT feed this morning. I appreciate the fresh thinking, in particular, being generative. Before you shared you were part of Toastmasters (an excellent organization, BTW), I was already thinking that you spoke extremely well, on point, without hesitations, hemming and hawing. Well done. Rgds from Canada.

EXTREMELY Helpful! Thankyou Thankyou

I think all four tips are great, but the first one hit home. Being generative is something that truly defined my 20s and it's the one thing that has been absent in my 30s. From now on, I'll try to make things happen again. The video was quite useful, Daniel. Thank you!

Good tips can't wait to start implementing them

Thank you so much for your video ☺️ your message was so comforting and it gives hope ❤

Thank you for sharing this. Very very helpful. Currently struggling.

Thank you. I love your intro. Made me feel better

Man, very logical and helpful advise. Thanks dude

It is great to know that there others going through the same things

Thanks for doing your videos

I relocated to Georgia from NYC and I have been trying to connect for almost 5 years now. There is a culture gap and interests don't generally line up to stimulate conversation. In addition, I spent the last 10 years as a government employee in Finance so relationships outside the workplace was not encouraged. It's really hard despite virtual social spaces that focus on networking

You're dealing with shy people who don't attract people easily. This may help some people however if I had a poker night at my house nobody would come I don't know enough people and the toxic ones would let me down just for spite and control.

Exceptional video! Very practical tips!

I know I’m late to the party and late to this video, but thank you so much for posting this! Very helpful.

Mayn.... you need to quit thinking you are old at 40, my mother is almost 80, vigorous, smart and active, live in the moment people. You are only as old as you think you are..

This video gives a little of good advice. 👍

As someone in my early 20s I get worried about this. I mean, this sort of thing hits home after high school and even college but I get scared of the idea of being alone and not having anyone to talk to. As much as I’d be happy for my current friends, it scares me the idea that they won’t probably see or talk to me once they’re married or have kids. I really don’t want to be in a situation where I’m just alone so I really want to broaden my horizons even at an older age

been stuck in the world of work, too many positions where "this job is your entire life now". Most of my old school/college friends have either moved states away or become total loosers. Work always setup adversarial relationships (character fight to see who survives next round of layoffs). other participating parents are almost always mothers so it's always awkward being the only dad.

Your intro was so touching to me.

helpful. thank you!

Great 👍 tips.

I always chose my interests to suit my friends at school and after school, now IV sorted my life out and stopped doing things just because other people liked them. Always the music I liked, the things I'm interested in and the things I like to talk about will often leave people with a blank face. Everyone in my trade industry is racist sexist and power hungry, I chose a trade because I wanted to be able to talk with my dad and brother about trade related things, now 7 years in I did everything for the wrong reasons and I'm studying counselling to change that. But it feels like no matter the path I chose I would be around people who could never understand me and I would always have to adjust myself to suit the group. I don't know what's harder, suffering with a smile or receiving pity just for expressing.....

I definitely needed to see a video like this one. I think focusing on activities is truly the way to go and making a real effort to put yourself out there. Much easier said than done but it's very doable.

As an introvert, I have found out that I’m really bad at group conversations, but my super power are one to one conversations. The problem is that this “socializing style” has led me to have disperse friendships that don’t have anything in common between each other. So when I try to make big plans with more people (like a party, a trip, etc) it’s a mess! My friends don’t get along with each other and sometimes even dislike each other. The same has happened to me, when friends try to add me to their social circle, it just feels like I don’t fit in. I think this is because people behave very differently in group situations and show a different side of themselves than while being with just one person. Maybe trying to socialize by forming triads could be a way to address this. Thanks for the tip!

great thanks

This was a profoundly helpful video. I'm 41 and I really fell off the social bandwagon especially post covid. Thanks for the help! Subscribed!

Having a group of Friends is the key, much more synergy that way- even if You're really just close friends with one of the people in it and casual with the 3rd+ in the group.

When you started crying, I cried. Because I know what it means to live without friends. I was two years from 21 to 23 years only. I saw a friend from time to time, but only 4 times a year. And the bewilderment I felt in those years was horrible. No girl. Stomach health problems, which I still have when I am almost 31 years old, I had enrolled in university but had not passed. I went into depression and anxiety for nearly two years. The year before I had a serious stomach problem, but I still had friends, but they turned out to be bad people, so I decided to drop them. After doing therapy, I went back to college to get a degree and in the meantime I had found a friend and it held up for a couple of years, after that things went downhill. I wish him all the best in the world, but a toxic climate had been created, because people had gotten in the way to cause discord and I hated that. From 28 to 29 I was left alone again. During the lockdown I had the thought of killing myself, luckily I live with my parents, otherwise I don't know if I would be alive. Now I'm thinking of radically changing my very precarious job (I live in Italy) And over time I have made 2 3 friends who I don't see much, because we don't live nearby. Friend, there is always the possibility, rest assured that things will be fine :) A person who had lost hope in life tells you that. I still have a hard time believing in life, for everything that has happened to me, but now maybe I have finally found a girl even if at a distance, but I don't care because I like her a lot. But until I was 28, I had only kissed girls and something more. Then things changed, but you still feel that strong sense of inadequacy, because I'm not the classic macho alpha super extrovert that follows that crazy Jordan Peterson, I'm more introverted and less inclined to have big social groups, I love Soundgarden, Radiohead, Nirvana and Pearl jam, books, nature, writing, reading, playing the guitar, jogging and singing and composing graphics. But I hate this social stigma on men who are more introverted, have mental health difficulties or don't have many friends or aren't rich enough or have health problems. I've never been a leader. It's difficult when you have 31 and are alone

I'm 33 & I'm A Proud Lone Wolf. 🐺 🌙

Great advice now to grow a set and attempt these.

Lol... I'm invisible. Looked up how to make friends as an adult and I get 30s-40s, then 60s! In my 50s, I have little in common with Millennials (30s-40s), although we get along. Same with younger Boomers (60s). I can be cool with either, but I'm looking for real friendship. It's even tougher when you move far from your childhood hometown.

I'm 23. I see my friends early but it is always awesome seeing them.

I moved from my hometown than the girl I wanted to have a life with passed away.. both my parents are gone I'm only 36 and now that I don't drink I find it hard to meet new people I feel disconnected from everyone...I've always been a social outcast people are quick to judge me

I'm in a new town where I don't know anybody. It's difficult to try and push people to go do things when most people don't give me a second look.

I'm 30. Ever since I got out of the army, it's been hard to make friends and find love. The issue is people my age are married or working. I'm a injured, pstd sticken vet so apparently it means I'm damaged or too old or unrelatable. It's annoying because I'm too much of a downer to others.

The best tip I have is to put yourself into situations where new friends can be found. If you aren’t doing that, it won’t happen.

The problem I have is I keep going back to past friends that I know really aren’t right for me I want a brand new set of friends nobody from my past they must have similar interests not just going out drinking that isn’t for me anymore

I'm going to be 40 in November. I have a girlfriend, but no other friends in a city I've been living in for almost 3 years. I have a lot of work to do, but videos like this one help. Thank you.

I've also tried meetup. I made my own group. Covid halted progress and I lost contact with my 3 regular attendees. Joined another meetup, nice people, but it was/is about an hour away. Too far to keep traveling for surface level conversation and no real connections. I vibes with one lady at the event 1 week ago. I texted her asking about another event she'd went to. It took her so long (over 12 hrs) to get back with Me that I decided I wouldn't invite her anywhere. I just think that's so rude

Part of being a friend is practicing mental hygiene by talking positively, avoid gossip, share interesting things about your activities and interests such as books you read, movies, music, trips or charities.

31 and no friends also It seems easier if you stay in a area you were raised in I moved to FL 5 yrs ago didnt know anyone.. its pros and cons to being alone .. some ppl have the opposite issue NEVER ALONE and dependent on others no true connection to self Thanks for your vid love your videos

I'm 42 and I don't have friends here anymore bcoz they live far away a d has their own family. I'm single and living with my father.it is lonely sometimes knowing that you have no friends to talk with.

Subscribed:)

Inviting stands out here for me.

If anyone would love to have me as a friend , I will be happy to have them. I am a 39 years old Nigerian and I believe that friendship involves giving what we want to receive from others. I will offer pure friendship as that is what I desire too.

Some good points I haven't heard from others made here. But it has to be said that the chances are still very low because most guys in 30s/40s are prioritising relationship and career, 90% don't have time or even want new friends. Not to mention men in general are more closed off and less social to begin with. I haven't had a friend since I left school where real friendships are organically made and I have to say, almost every single person who was willing to be acquainted with me, did so because I served a purpose and when I was no longer required, they would start rejecting invitations. There are good people out there that do simply enjoy socialising, but they are rare and you need to keep meeting people and hoping to meet the right one.

We get more cynical as we age.

I have no one I can call a true “friend” at the moment. I know a bunch of people, and have reached out, but no one ever calls or texts back. Kind of a bummer.

People usually are married in their 30s with a spouse and children then focus on their own family. Imo, that’s kind of a problem when it comes to people who are single in their 30s with no friends or spouse. I myself would like to find other people in their 30s that aren’t married and have no children but it is actually difficult to find. A lot of people are married and I think im kind of a rare person for not being married at all. I am shy and have a hard time opening up. I don’t think I should make friends with people younger than me that is like in their early 20s. Currently, I work in an environment part-time around many younger people in their early 20s and feel kind of awkward in working on making new friends with them simply because of my age (31F). To me it kind of sucks and I am looking around everyday for people at least two years older than me. This is kind of a problem for me right now that it becomes a pretty stressful task to do. need help, thanks!

My brother can make friends easier at the age of 37 but I on the other hand I cant find a real friend at the age 35 I changed my behavior etc etc and I sometimes listen to what they say but still It doesn't make any difference, most of my past friends are either buisy with life or family.

How do I develop new interests when it kinda feels like nothing brings me joy anymore...?

🎉🎉😊😊

Im 19 and feel like Im genuinely living the last year with friends, dont know why. So Im preparing haha

I'm looking for a club to join. I'm not sure which one to choose.

In my 38 years of life people are just too judgemental too damn judgemental and not in a good way

I don’t have any friends. I’m in Houston Texas

45 and honestly ive not spoken to my only real freins since i was in my 20s .

I'm Chris I'm 25 all of my friends that I use to have I meet in school I graduated in 2015 after graduation I only kept in contact with one friend but we Lost all contact with each other in 2019 since then I have only really met one good friend I have became very happy and comfortable living the life style I live go to work come home eat sleep on days off work go fishing not taking to anyone but even though I'm happy and comfortable I'm not completely satisfied I would love to meet a few good friends to have cookouts every weekend go to the river with have a few drinks with around a fire in the back yard

I'm just out of a long term relationship and feeling lonely friends wise. I've one close friend left buy he's married the other handful I'd be stretching it to call them mates now. Obviously while in my own relationship they moved on themselves. I've tired to pick up where I left off but life has moved on. Its hard and depressing and I have being wallowing is self pity which won't help me either. I'm also extremely introverted. Are you better off with one good friend then 5 wasters?

M from india I saw your video first time It's imagine

I’m over all of the virtual meet ups. Where’s the in person stuff

Me too but im 17

Toastmasters I need to go back

Hi 😊 i had a great best friend untill i found out she was sleeping with my husband 😢 now i dont trust anyone so finding it hard to make friends

Disclaimer : a friendship can end by one’s fault yes! People can demand their relationship and interpersonal connection by their behaviour and atitudes ! So the statement at the beginning of this video is quite misleading and take out any responsibility people need to have to cultivate and keep people in their lives

I want someone to validate me. But hey, I guess that's a very tall order these days. 😟 -37/f/us

What if we don't know people?

Benefits of not having friends 1. Can move at your own pace and do things on your time instead of being tied down with other people's schedule. You get to determine at what time you see the movie and which theatre you go. If you wanna stay in the mall for 1 hour, you can do that instead of compromising with friends and leaving after 30 minutes. 2. Don't have to deal with other people's negative energy. Tell your so called friends your future plans and they give you a million reasons why you won't make it. No matter what good things you plan on accomplishing, people like giving all kinds of negative feedback. 3. Don't have to worry about somebody trying to control almost every aspect of your life. People have a hard time living and let live. They wanna control what you think, how you think, telling you who to vote for, debating with you if you don't see things they're way 4. Your friends problems become your problems. David got thrown out the house by his wife and now he's calling you asking you can he sleep on your couch. 5. People are bipolar. Today they're in a good mood but tomorrow they wanna be mean and combative with passive agressive behavior. 6. Dealing with people and the bs that comes along with them is too much work. It's like pulling teeth. 7. Why ruin you peace with friends

Anybody from south australia, im going to explore an abandoned wildlife complex next week if anybody would like to tag along for the thrill 😁

No thanks. The older I get, the more I despise grown ups. I’m 40 so I have that entitlement.

No kids not married live in the country and I have no interests lol. I lost motivation

I choose to live my life alone and have more strength, power, happyness, peace and time.....the more people around you, the more expectations, talk about others, jealousy, frustrations, violent, negativity, double standards, own benefits etc..... No, not everybody but it depends on many factors. Every situation is different and the older you get, the more be carefull and awake....i am 43 now, no kids, relationship.....and its ok for me. Happyness starts inside you and not with extern factors. Be the light in your life

😢😢

I'm not good at making .

I get alone with people older than me than people my age

My main problem is three of my friends are married and it's basically seems like they forgot about me like they never call me we barely Hangout and if we do is like once every two months or something . I'm not even dating right now by choice , I'm focusing on building up two businesses that I started , buying a new car and paying off probation. I don't want the distraction of a girlfriend right now and it's funny 1 my friends fat wives thinks I'm a loser because of that. I don't define success by whether or not I'm constantly with some female. I'm chasing real success not women and I'm definitely not going to just settle down with some fat bitch and be fucking poor forever fuck that shit I got goals.

I’m a Christian and it’s hard to have friends I would love to have friends but people are so mean to me because of my faith. I’m 32 and alone. I pray for friends

As a member of the LGBT community...Triad has a very different meaning 😂

Fade? Ah so the assumption is you had friends. Cool. I never explored or had friends as a kid, teen or adult. I don't go out , and because l don't work l can't really do things. I don't have any interests, never had any , how do people get those ? And as invating goes won't people just call Police on you, if you start inviting random people ?