Marriage Ruins Everything. Jim Colliton - Full Special
Рет қаралды 1,238,781
Күн бұрынMarriage ruins everything, at least it does according to Jim Colliton, especially cute things like sleeping next to each other or hearing the other persons heartbeat. Whether you are a fan of marriage or whether you think it is just as rough as Jim Colliton, this full Dry Bar Comedy special is sure to keep you laughing from start to finish.
If you enjoyed this full Dry Bar Comedy special from Jim Colliton, be sure to check out the links below for even more Dry Bar Comedians you might enjoy!
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@commonsense124 3 жыл бұрын
The shredder advise is pure gold. So true.
@tigerlily102511 2 жыл бұрын
I can't shred any of my daughter's art. She is too smart. She would know. So I have a tote and every once in a while we go through it because she gets nostalgic. ❤
@tina849 2 жыл бұрын
@@tigerlily102511 When my kids were little I made the laudry room into the laundry room/art gallery & hung all their artwork on the walls & even the ceiling. Every now & again I would switch out some of the older stuff with new masterpieces. They loved it & really enjoyed showing it off to family & friends.
@fdaniel52fd 2 жыл бұрын
@@tina849 I
@TD-dn1jo 10 ай бұрын
😂
@Holymaneli 2 жыл бұрын
Dry Bar is a GODSEND! As an European I have discovered so many incredible comedians!! Thank you so much!
@avivaainbinder9236 8 ай бұрын
Same!
@imacloud11 3 жыл бұрын
"I'll do ya one better, idk where we even keep the paper towels" 😂😂
@anthonybroadnax4987 3 жыл бұрын
And I was waiting for, “and I don’t even care...” very funny. I also have to say, as a “math person” I couldn’t stop laughing at the bit about the train word problem.
@livinginvt11 2 жыл бұрын
Jim has just the right amount of family love and snarkiness.
@Xraygirlie100 3 жыл бұрын
OMG, that line about the wife in bed “rollover” was hysterical. Lol!
@tootstoyou1 2 жыл бұрын
Listening to this while making dinner. Divorced, living alone, but still …. miraculously happy 😄😉
@lots3799 2 жыл бұрын
Me too...
@thegregitto 2 жыл бұрын
go you!
@tatianasouza2361 2 жыл бұрын
Happiness comes from God being within you.
@vanekirk 2 жыл бұрын
I think that when you are truly happier after divorce, you were married to absolutely the wrong person. No question about it.
@lots3799 2 жыл бұрын
@@vanekirk 🤔I can see that..Thats logical.
@kbme5047 2 жыл бұрын
This was waaaayyyyyy funnier than I expected!!!! I cried laughing the whole time
@kumari6004 Жыл бұрын
Maybe watch Fred Klett too..
@TheBLT16 3 жыл бұрын
Sir just keep doing what you are doing. You are an amazing comedian, you need to do another show for DRYBAR. Please! 👍
@conchitach1466 3 жыл бұрын
I Agree!!!
@direwolf6234 2 жыл бұрын
as a veteran of marriage and children i endorse this guy's message... too funny..!!
@zakboor 3 жыл бұрын
This guy cracked me up! Great material.
@Amanishakheto 2 жыл бұрын
Is your cat by any chance... depressed? 😆
@myles2019 2 жыл бұрын
I did the same for my kids, when they got out of the bath or the pool they would have a warm towel
@antonburger01 3 жыл бұрын
This guys is an absolute pro! Great material and great timing from beginning to end! Comedy of the highest standard. It's guys like these who keep me exclusively coming back to Dry Bar Comedy!
@edithdlp8045 2 жыл бұрын
I love Drybar, great comedy no vulgarity.
@mx_lei 3 жыл бұрын
The best routine about family life I've come across 😂😂
@peteroz7332 2 жыл бұрын
try Jeff Allen... 👍 he's good too and a bit more experienced 😉
@theresalance8673 2 жыл бұрын
I have loved Dry Bar ever since I first found it on KZfaq. Mr Colliton is one of the funniest I've seen so far 🤣 😂
@missybliss4357 3 жыл бұрын
Awww.. I love that his family is the focus of his work. It’s so heartwarming. Bless. I giggled the whole time.
@juliegreene1844 3 жыл бұрын
Giggling along with you ...hahaha hehehehe
@nicholasfrancis8381 3 жыл бұрын
That way, he can truly say that they are his whole life and if he ever complains that one of them isn't doing their part at home, the can say "if it wasn't for me, you'd be unemployed" 🤣
@LisaGemini 3 жыл бұрын
He is hilarious. I love the paper shredder joke!
@abrokenandacontriteheart1308 3 жыл бұрын
He is hilarious! And is probably very loving but his wife most likely has something to do with it. Lol
@abbygailaji3153 3 жыл бұрын
It's to bad I can't press like over and over love his jokes
@lonewolffisherman7092 2 жыл бұрын
Huge belly laugh listening to the word problem bit. I hated word problems. I remember the train thing and asking my teacher if nobody had a schedule.
@alicerose8057 3 жыл бұрын
My parents used to warm my clothes up in the dryer on cold mornings when I was a teenager to help me get up and get to school 😉
@nieczerwony 3 жыл бұрын
You are lucky. I was taking cold shower every morning and im winter my grandpa and my dad were taking use to the yard aomwe can brush ourselfs with snow. 🤣 But to be honest I miss this a lot.😔
@delorasledge2492 3 жыл бұрын
That is adorable
@Sundayschoolnetwork 3 жыл бұрын
Awesome love memory
@shar8528 3 жыл бұрын
My mother after she just finished washing my blanket and pulling it out of the dryer would bring it to me fresh and warm. My cat then would come lay with me cause he loved it too.
@alicerose8057 3 жыл бұрын
@@shar8528 awe so sweet ❤️
@megangarcia6991 3 жыл бұрын
I love his accent! It makes the whole bit feel more grungy and funny!
@Antonio-ti2he 3 жыл бұрын
Boston accent I believe...
@j10001 2 жыл бұрын
He grew up outside Boston in Bedford, MA. Lives in Wakefield now. So his accent has a North Shore flavor.
@ppumpkin3282 2 жыл бұрын
@@j10001 i came from the same area, but i can't hear an accent. sounds normal to me.
@amycory2495 2 жыл бұрын
Absolute gold! This man is a gem and truly loves his family, you can tell. I love Drybar in general but this set is one of my top two or three of all time. An aching chest and tears rolling down my face from LAUGHING so hard is so appreciated, especially in this day and age! Thank you, sir! Don’t ever stop being you!
@imacloud11 3 жыл бұрын
This guy is golddd 😂😂
@Trudloops 2 жыл бұрын
This was so funny. The "watching you breathe" segment was LOL hilarous. Someone's peeing on the spark ...the tennis skirt that holds the balls 🤣🤣🤣
@graceanthony 2 жыл бұрын
Jim Colliton has a creative way of relating everyday family occurrences, good for you Jim. You were a refreshing pause to my hot tired day.
@brett4264 Жыл бұрын
Hes funny. I wouldn't mind seeing more of him.
@Sailingbill1 2 жыл бұрын
THAT is classic 100% Boston humor. Thank you Jim for adding humor to my day!
@livenotonevil8279 3 жыл бұрын
Love the accent! To me it increases the delivery factor by 50%
@karenlowes7802 3 жыл бұрын
What accent?
@livenotonevil8279 3 жыл бұрын
@@karenlowes7802 I'm guessing you're from the Jersey area.
@imchayanger9526 3 жыл бұрын
Agreed
@sanaioelu826 3 жыл бұрын
@Edward Telles I heard him say ‘mum’ a lot, and I was confused.. ‘I thought Americans say ‘mom’.? 🤷♀️
@ryotaarai3816 3 жыл бұрын
He sounds American Italian from New York/Jersey
@stariadreamtea 3 жыл бұрын
This was a pleasant surprise. 👍Based on the name of the set I was worried - but he's actually a gruff guy with a heart of gold. You can tell he loves his family. Loved the part where he was prepared to pay for a really expensive college for his daughter even when she wasn't sure what she wanted to do. That's really patient and supportive of him. He's an involved father.
@rebekahweber2413 3 жыл бұрын
I agree he loves his family. But I think it was more about the wife. Notice the wife was not against the expensive college with no major in site.
@jamest3552 3 жыл бұрын
Why would you be worried? It's a comedy show, sit back and enjoy, no political correctness needed.
@TymP321 3 жыл бұрын
Yeah... Totally proving stupid is as stupid does. Get $100,000 in college debt to whine about with no career path.
@luckyb4541 Жыл бұрын
He’s making it up, he’s a comedian, they are jokes, do you know what embellishing is
@avanellehansen4525 3 жыл бұрын
Seamless transitions. So funny without swearing.
@margieinnes4638 2 жыл бұрын
Great to be able to enjoy the humour without constant swearing:)
@barbsnyder1352 3 жыл бұрын
Absolutely hysterical!
@Cristianomedinaramos 2 жыл бұрын
Man he killed me, so funny. And love that accent, like he's a gangster from the 20's
@anthonymarachev4375 2 жыл бұрын
I'm not hearing it at all
@feralkat9370 2 жыл бұрын
Havent laughed so hard in awhile! So effortlessly funny! His whole set was about his family, yet it was so classy AND entertaining, unlike others that make one cringe when they put down their wives or kids. Hope to see more of him!
@lmm1586 2 жыл бұрын
Clean humor never goes out of style😀👏🏻
@murieltainter5936 3 жыл бұрын
Sarcastic...... just the way I like it.
@jamesonbornholdt7302 3 жыл бұрын
I can sense the sarcasm...
@cashcreators 2 жыл бұрын
@Darren Munsell r
@mewregaurdhissyfit7733 Жыл бұрын
I LOVE comedians that make fun of real life!!! The BEST!!!
@mwinchester66 2 жыл бұрын
This was funny from start to end. Loved it and belly laughed the entire time! 😃
@williamwomack3153 2 жыл бұрын
“So true!” Said every married guy who ever hears this…awesome lol
@maryanne9927 3 жыл бұрын
His joke about the aerosmith song🤣🤣🤣🤣thinking about it, he makes alota sense
@michellesanjuan1898 3 жыл бұрын
Love Love this guy! Talented, spontaneous clean family humor!
@davern_nyxgaming6584 3 жыл бұрын
The lunch part got me dead😂😂😂
@jbyepitsme4330 3 жыл бұрын
HOLY OMGOSH HILARIOUS!!😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣 hands down awesome stand up. Had me laughing super hard till my face and ribs hurt from start to finish😂🤣for sure one my new top favorite comedians👍🤣😂😄😁Thank you so much for sharing.
@jjjjomy6447 2 жыл бұрын
Seeing this at 3 am in the morning it's just too dangerous 😂😂😂😂😂😂 laughing myself out without making a sound 🤣🤣🤣🤣this man the best
@danceswithtwins8048 3 жыл бұрын
Marriage can do these things to a couple. Once menopause starts, any additional heat source is to be avoided at all costs for a woman. Sorry, but it’s true....even a warm breath is too much to tolerate.
@petermachiela5441 2 жыл бұрын
Get separate beds problem solved
@yaakovina 2 жыл бұрын
@@petermachiela5441 but it doesn’t last forever 😉
@Its6string Жыл бұрын
I’ve been on the couch ever since menopause, especially during the summer months-LOL!!! Poor thing, she’s like a Hot-Potato!!! BUT, whatever it takes👍🏼
@isay207 Жыл бұрын
I hear you he's got 4 blankets Ive got a sheet🥵
@careyashley8309 Жыл бұрын
Menopause sucks! I've told my husband "sorry in advance". 😅
@venitha11 Жыл бұрын
Oh. I Laughed so hard 😅😅I’ve been married for 28 years n I can relate to some of those things😂😂
@yvonnealmassi8957 3 жыл бұрын
Wow!!! I loved every minute of your show . Got to share this with my son and spouse of 31 years . Thank you . I love comedy, you are great!!!
@williamharris3707 3 жыл бұрын
Truly funny. May me thank back when i had kids in the house. Memories
@toniy5515 3 жыл бұрын
Hilarious, love the exaggerated family stories, the LL Bean one, too funny!
@michellelansky4490 3 жыл бұрын
He really captures exactly what everyone's gone through. Exact examples.......sending the older kid to take the younger to the bathroom.
@feyswiftie13 3 жыл бұрын
Man you are hilarious, my stomach hurts and the common sense joke had me dying 😂😂😂
@lararomont8348 3 жыл бұрын
My favorites were his answer to the college, his two year old, the shredder, and trimmer. 😂
@mwametallic7668 3 жыл бұрын
I enjoy comedy....it makes me happy! Thanks for being funny man
@nancyanderson6404 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for the laughs!!
@mangafq8 3 жыл бұрын
As a happy widow, I warm up my own pjs in the dryer.👍
@thomasgustafson185 Жыл бұрын
DRYBAR has some of the funniest comedians I've ever seen and, wait for it, little or no curse words. Holy smokes what NOVEL idea.
@mammamia8616 Жыл бұрын
Funny!!! Absolutely pulls off every joke perfectly. ⭐️⭐️⭐️
@missrob4538 2 жыл бұрын
This is a darn good family man I just love his clean concept very good enjoy this to the max
@Rosie_C 3 жыл бұрын
Three year old asking, “What are you doing?” I most often answer sarcastically. I’m changing sheets on the bed, so I say, “I’m riding my bike and eating a pickle.”
@charlenegriffis5900 3 жыл бұрын
😂😂😂 I love him. He is so funny!
@croatiansensation6062 2 жыл бұрын
What a great performance from beginning to end! A+ Comedy
@Djshade527 2 жыл бұрын
This is my first time watching a comedian and I chose this one. Thank you Dry Bar.
@kimcasem 2 жыл бұрын
I like your double-space style
@Brijilelias 2 жыл бұрын
Watching your routine actually brought my husband of 25 years and I closer together…laughter has a way of doing that, right? It is refreshing to see how transparent you are about long-term marriages, how common our experiences are…and, more importantly, we can still see the good and press on together. Life is tough and our partners should be viewed as allies and not enemies. As we age, we need more of those allies. Thanks for keeping your material relevant and fresh!
@laquishalida3569 Жыл бұрын
love this guy with clean relative natural family jokes
@cheyennemundy9681 2 жыл бұрын
Lol, the part about kids' home work really got me! I home school my kids, and was just teaching my five year old about geometric shapes today. I kept forgetting the name for what half of a Hexagon is. My Google history today, is a lot of searching for half of a Hexagon and the word Trapezoid, over and over. I think probably the last time I ever had to use the word Trapezoid was my own math assignments back in second or third grade.
@lempweiroiie7377 3 жыл бұрын
My wife and I have 8 kids and we let our walls the spots for their art pieces... till the youngest started ECE, then I repaint the walls back to white again. When they looked at the photos of walls, they couldn't believe that they did all those... and that to me was a good parenting. LOL!
@lui9695 2 жыл бұрын
What is ece
@ismailowino2866 2 жыл бұрын
@@lui9695 Early Childhood Education
@brianclemons5375 2 жыл бұрын
Dope. Doing that today
@tolvera29365 11 ай бұрын
Satin paint and magic eraser. They can do art for years
@happysmurfette 3 жыл бұрын
You’re clever and witty🙌🙌🌟Thank You JC for sharing your talent🔥🌪💎
@edgarflores5569 3 жыл бұрын
I enjoyed it very much! Loved the final joke
@russhamel 3 жыл бұрын
Best Dry Bar yet. I really enjoyed this guy. 😄
@japanesefunnyshorts8584 Жыл бұрын
That's gotta be the most Bostonian accent I've ever heard outta Dry Bar. Great set, really love his caustic wit.
@gailwilkinson8848 2 жыл бұрын
Sat here with tears rolling down my face and my back hurting with 😃 😀 😄 laughter..
@mamastern 3 жыл бұрын
In the wife’s defense, Tupperware is crazy expensive 😂
@m3technologies236 Жыл бұрын
Gotta say I love Jim Colliton. Glad I watched this. I'm looking forward to hearing more from him!
@ShannonTheMojito 3 жыл бұрын
Now I don't mind sitting apart on the plane but if my man is in first class and I'm in coach, he's definitely not seeing my ankles anytime soon.
@graceamerican3558 3 жыл бұрын
rofl 🤣
@stevedmytrusz8347 3 жыл бұрын
You win the internet!👍 😂
@nicholasfrancis8381 3 жыл бұрын
Awesome honey! Full hijab for him😂
@feyswiftie13 3 жыл бұрын
😂😂😂😂
@MegaSnow121 3 жыл бұрын
Funny! Loved this guy. Thanks for laugh after laugh. :-)
@TheUSHERKAN 2 жыл бұрын
Some jokes are usually lost on this Ugandan girl( that's me) But this particular set... made me literally LOL. Thank you DB for these uploads. You've got a subbie and nightly 'watcher' here in Uganda. ❤
@adriana27100 3 жыл бұрын
He sounds just like Vince Vaughn! Anyone else hear it?
@mookyyzed2216 3 жыл бұрын
This guy is great!
@sheilastahl633 10 ай бұрын
Jim what a great fun time hearing you.
@cristinamartinez9186 3 жыл бұрын
Omg!!! I loved this guy!!! I laughed so hard.. you know the ugly silent laugh 😆
@tclemons469 3 жыл бұрын
Absolutely wonderful😂😂😂😂😂
@carrissamcwilliam5757 2 ай бұрын
Love love love this man. Funny, relatable and brilliant execution. Please bring him back 💗😂🙏
@kristyvest2536 2 жыл бұрын
Best show ever! Laughed my butt off!!🤣🤣🤣🤣
@Prosch23 3 жыл бұрын
not ONE bad joke!!!! He is a comedy master!!! This is on level with Gaffigan and Seinfeld!
@romeooscaryankeelimaoscarg9898 3 жыл бұрын
If only Seinfeld was funny.
@Prosch23 3 жыл бұрын
@@romeooscaryankeelimaoscarg9898 it is funny if dry deadpan humor is your tickle feather...most who think he isn't funny don't share his comedic perspective.
@romeooscaryankeelimaoscarg9898 3 жыл бұрын
@@Prosch23 Jerry Seinfeld is an it now?
@Prosch23 3 жыл бұрын
@@romeooscaryankeelimaoscarg9898 Jerry is a he...Seinfeld is an it. Seinfeld the SHOW.
@romeooscaryankeelimaoscarg9898 3 жыл бұрын
@@Prosch23 I thought we were talking about comedians.
@gemspiritmessages2754 3 жыл бұрын
That was hilarious 😆
@tinkalinks Жыл бұрын
I don't know why the wife's bedtime commentary was so hilarious to me😂😂😂❤
@drbbass 3 жыл бұрын
Hilarious!!!!!! Everything is so true and spot on!!!!!!!
@HG-yo8wj Жыл бұрын
My husband ALWAYS gets spoiled on Fathers Day, but the rest of the jokes were spot on!😆
@innerjourneysascendingnow7937 2 жыл бұрын
He is really good! Laughed so hard! Really relatable subjects. Great 👍👍👍😊👍😊😂😂😂
@caethgarner4968 3 жыл бұрын
Love this special!
@AprilHart 3 жыл бұрын
I was crying from laughing so hard within the first few minutes...omgLOLOLOL
@CommentingTheTruth 2 жыл бұрын
Spot on about driving and grocery shopping! SPOT ON!!
@conchitach1466 3 жыл бұрын
A+ comedian!! Wow! Hilarious 🤣
@joycebates6308 Жыл бұрын
This guy is spot on!! Very clean entertainment.
@wide_eyedblind_mom3941 3 жыл бұрын
LMAO too funny! Would love to see more of this guy!
@reginahandley8112 Жыл бұрын
Great show!! Best I have seen in a long time.
@Gaddemonka 3 жыл бұрын
Hilarious!! Loved it 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
@marisawalker4400 3 жыл бұрын
Hilarious! Great delivery
@0Hillbilly 3 жыл бұрын
Marriage... the number one cause of divorce.
@patriciaque197 3 жыл бұрын
😅
@jayboogie7956 3 жыл бұрын
Facts
@majoroldladyakamom6948 3 жыл бұрын
Old joke. Another old joke? Marriage is a wonderful institution... if you like instutional living... ⚘😋⚘
@0Hillbilly 3 жыл бұрын
@@majoroldladyakamom6948 good one!
@aalynnodell9809 3 жыл бұрын
Indeed! 2-25-21 after 3 yrs waiting im finally free from a cheating narcissist. Best feeling in the world!!
@sheamarie6120 3 жыл бұрын
So Funny and true! My face hurts and my voice is hoarse from laughing!
@bridgetdraper5146 3 жыл бұрын
I had to let go of my husband yesterday. I needed this! Thank you💖💐
@yvonneiwasa6507 2 жыл бұрын
Bridget, not sure if you’ll see this 3 months later, but I’m so sorry for your loss. Keep finding ways to smile.
@bridgetdraper5146 2 жыл бұрын
@@yvonneiwasa6507 Thank you! I am resilient. I appreciate your kindness immensely!🌻
@toomessy 2 жыл бұрын
So sorry for your loss. Take care and have a nice day! You deserve the absolute best.
@bridgetdraper5146 2 жыл бұрын
@@toomessy Blessings upon you and all you do always!
@roxy4158 2 жыл бұрын
Bridget i hope that you are well. Broken heart is impossible to mend even over time. Goodbye is so difficult to express because it means forever in this life. I said goodbye to my first and only love of over 60 years together. Laughter is a healer.
@altheamcnabb2829 3 жыл бұрын
OMG nonstop entertainment...please come back. I loved ya!
@annieslat9214 3 жыл бұрын
You are awesome very few from the dry bar make me belly laugh. THank you
@dianaspy6733 3 жыл бұрын
Enjoyed this! Ty😂
@socalcrow3408 3 жыл бұрын
Hahaha...a shredder for the artwork...they won't miss it
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