Montessori & Discipline - Understanding Freedom within Limits | Guide & Grow TV
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Күн бұрынMONTESSORI & DISCIPLINE
In this video we discuss the 3 Key Skills that you will learn to help guide discipline in a Montessori Home / Classroom to diffuse feelings of anger and frustration in children. It will teach you how to instill healthy boundaries and understand “freedom within limits” with mature reactions, remaining calm and allow for teachable moments in any situation.
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@stephencurrie3349 4 жыл бұрын
This is very helpful for everyone from educators, parents grandparents etc.
@GuideGrowTV 4 жыл бұрын
Feel free to share :)
@crsp76691 3 жыл бұрын
Helpful thanks
@simply_linka 3 жыл бұрын
What if I offer a choice and my child still says no? Or if I say that she can play with another toy when she cleans up the one she was playing with and she still takes out the other toy and doesn't listen?
@ExpectingFitness 2 жыл бұрын
Great video. I have twins. 3 yrs old. I have 2 issues. 1- How to get them to stop destructivly touching and grabbing everything, they know they shouldnt. The worst is in the kitchen when cooking. Its not possible to have everything put away and they just figured out how to open child safety locks on cabinets. 2- how to get one of them to focus in classes I take them to. She just dances around doing her own thing, talking and doesnt pay attention. And cannot sit still for 2 seconds ever. Unless watching videos on youtube. It also frustrating in resturants. As much as I hate it, I have to use ipad as a last resort to keep her from disturbing others.
@GuideGrowTV 6 ай бұрын
I just wanted to apologise for this comment going unnoticed for so long! I will respond for any other users that may have a similar question as I am sure your twins are now 5! It's so hard when children are actively exploring and want to be in your spaces, it comes down to boundaries and having certain rules and also giving them options of what to do instead, another thing is to involve them in the food prep in a way that is manageable and okay for you as well. Focusing is age and developmentally appropriate it gets better over time :)
@ArdashMuradian 5 жыл бұрын
Congratulations on launching your new channel!
@GuideGrowTV 5 жыл бұрын
Yes, thank you!!
@rubinajanmohammad6778 3 жыл бұрын
Love your videos. Would love your advice on how to get my 12mo to stop pulling my hair. I have tried ‘my hair is not for pulling, please be gentle’ then show him how to be gentle but it just doesn’t work. Has been going on for months
@GuideGrowTV 3 жыл бұрын
The first step is acknowledging the child so stating "You love pulling my hair" then you can say "Pulling hair hurts" and I would be offering the child something else to pull like a wooden ring with ribbons attached or something else to pull, I would also have a boundary in place so "I'm just reminding you when I pick you up my hair isn't for pulling" then when they do it and you've done the following steps above, you can easily let them know you will have to put them down if they continue to pull. You need to fulfill that urge to pull in a way that is appropriate
@qetiqavtaradze8678 4 жыл бұрын
Very helpful. I only wish photos or videos of examles for them who aren't english native speakers, it will be more easier. Thank you!
@GuideGrowTV 4 жыл бұрын
Great suggestion! Thank you, we are hoping to start filming some examples soon.
@moonmoony9810 3 жыл бұрын
My baby is 11 months old he biting me when he feel frustrated or when i nursing him how to deal with that
@kyesg1217 2 жыл бұрын
Hello Sylvia! New follower her and first time mom to a very active baby boy who just turned 10months 3 days ago. I’m a silent reader in your FB group montessori at home (0-3 yrs). I just have to ask how to apply the 3 methods on a 10month old who is already really showing his autonomy in actions & emotions. I know he doesn’t understand my words yet but what he can understand is my emotions and I find being calm and firm when I tell him not to do something works sometimes, but not always. I REALLY WANT to apply these methods as early as him being 10months but it’s hard as he cannot understand words yet and choose verbally.
@GuideGrowTV 2 жыл бұрын
Hi there, thanks for reaching out! So the beauty about these skills is that you can still use them with your child while they are learning to communicate as you will be surprised they actually work! I will give you an example: I had a 9 month old girl and she was holding a maraca in an infant class and she would cry every time her mum took the maraca when it was time to pack away. So the mum asked me for help. I went over, said to her "You're so upset, you're having so much fun you don't want to pack away. It's time to go home, you can place it in my hand or in the basket you choose" The baby placed it in the basket. It is possible! They do feel and understand you so keep talking to your baby and you may have to help them choose sometimes, like "place it in my hand or i'll have to take it from you" but always give them the choice and connect first
@sandratamayo1945 4 жыл бұрын
How do you do this while dealing with kids fighting over toys or constantly pushing little brother and not sharing? I all hear is constant fighting and crying, leads me to getting angry and giving a time out. What consequences can I use when one is hurting the other?
@milesmillana5870 2 жыл бұрын
Following this question
@trrhyn 3 жыл бұрын
at what age do you start implimenting these skills, as far as... like my son just turned two last week and if I asked him to help me with something he would either do it because he wants to but if he didnt want to he would walk away. Im not sure how to engage him into listening, sometimes he hears me i can see he does but he chooses not to repsond. Im a fairly passive parent and some would say Im perhaps too easy going on him but I would like to understand how to get him to respond to rewuirements a little more but not sure if he is too young? Does that make sense? lol FYI: He has recently discovered how to push the step thing we have (to wash hands brush teeth ect) to the stove and climb on top of it, which is so dangerous in so many ways and I cant allow it natural consequences to happen there, does anyone have any ideas how to manage a behavior like this?
@milenabaltova2519 6 ай бұрын
Hello, much appreviated! How to deal with an 11 month old, who insists on touching the toilet and the toilet brush and in general licks the bathroom tiles? I remove her from the bathroom, but she comes back. I don't want to use negative words, but I get really frustrated and I can't help myself saying "Don't touch this, it's dirty!". How do I deal such situation in a Montessori way?
@GuideGrowTV 6 ай бұрын
Firstly as an 11 month old developmentally they will not have any power of control so they really want to explore and understand the world around them. There is a particular interest it seems your child has in the bathroom maybe the texture, the sight etc, so you need to understand that and provide it to them outside that space so they are receiving the stimulant they are looking for. This was they will not be seeking it in the bathroom, also if you can find a way to keep the door closed while no one is using it this may help as well. i would use language like "You really love exploring, the bathroom is only for the toilet, you can use this or this instead" give them options. Hope that helped :)
@mariadelrosario2962 3 жыл бұрын
How do deal with a situation wherein he's always clingy to you. Like when we wake up, I will try to prepare his meal but he keeps on insisting that he wants to be carried. So i ended up not being able to cook or do anyrhing. Also in your scenario regarding the spilled water, what if the glass is broken on the floor, would you still allow the kid to help you? Thank you in advance.
@GuideGrowTV 3 жыл бұрын
Safety is ALWAYS first so I would make sure the child knows that there is glass and they need to stay back and you can model how to clean up the glass and they will be able to help with the vacuum after it is safe to do so. In terms of being clingy how old is your little one? Children will become independent when they have formed secure attachments so sometimes they need this security and attachment depending what they are going through. You can always acknowledge "You really want to be picked up, I am right here, as soon as I finish this I can lift you up, you can wait there or choose a toy while you wait" or you can also baby wear - again depending on the age the advice will vary
@raisingchildrennetwork 3 жыл бұрын
In terms of clingy, I Also faced the same issue,yes it is true guide grow TV, he slowly became to independent and I want to tell you that I am using the montessori method in home since my son was 4 months , now he is 3 years old and thanks to Dr Maria montessori for introducing this wonderful method,if the glass is broken I also use the same theory as you mentioned, try to implement montessori environment in your home, it makes both baby Ana me happy,
@yesikhaatmadja4474 4 жыл бұрын
When do you start implementing this? Is 16mo too young to understand this?
@GuideGrowTV 4 жыл бұрын
No that is a great age, so just because a child is not yet verbal it doesn't mean they can't understand we have used these skills as young as 8 months and they worked!
@wendyhinojosa4722 4 жыл бұрын
My son gets really upset and when I offer a choice he is still crying or screaming. What should I do? Do I wait for him to stop crying? Sometimes it seems easier to distract him and have him focus on something else.
@GuideGrowTV 4 жыл бұрын
It's really important to firstly make sure you empathize and acknowledge their feelings so their feelings can calm down before offering a choice. I know it's hard but you can offer them a hug or try and comfort them before implementing the expectations and the choice . If you skip the first step, no other information or choices will work. Try that and let us know how you go :)
@GuideGrowTV 4 жыл бұрын
Also watch our "Big emotions video"...you can try and distract him but that is really just a quick fix instead of building his ability to self-regulate and understand how he is feeling and build the skills to know how to cope with feeling upset
@chantellescott6840 4 жыл бұрын
5.07, you ‘trying’ to be angry haha
@mymontessori3012 4 жыл бұрын
Hahaha I should've tried harder
@kremenagiannino 3 жыл бұрын
Hello, The concept of Time-Out, still very confised when could be used..we use " go to your room, on the thinking chair for certain time frame to think about it"..many times she bangs on the door and screams for me to let her out of the room..so I feel like I have either modify or use different approach for the situations... Also, many times he doesn't want to clean up her toys..even with options.. How do I improve that? When I pick her up from school she goes on constant snack requests..candies, cookies, some other food..one after another..she usually has good amount of snacks in school also..so I feel like she just does it out of boredom.. Progects manu times not interested, need tips on how to get her to want to do more.. Thank you very much for your useful tips😊
@GuideGrowTV 3 жыл бұрын
Hi there, it is difficult to advise without the age of your child however the problem with time outs is that they teach children that if we remove love and remove them from a situation it fixes things and this is not a great lesson or valuable to build their life skills. It is really essential that we support children to build their skills of self-discipline and engage them in teachable moments...they do not understand punishment as they are JUST learning themselves so it is not effective and unfortunately doesn't help the situation. So always follow the three steps in this video and also there is another one on engaging cooperation - so how to get them on board watch that it will really help too. We also offer a 2 hour online workshop where we go through all of these topics in depth, I think this will really help you learn more www.guideandgrow.com/workshops
@kremenagiannino 3 жыл бұрын
My daughter is 4 years old
@sofiahilali4417 4 жыл бұрын
How long does the video of the course last when you purchase it?
@sofiahilali4417 4 жыл бұрын
Also what age is it recommended to start implementing these tools? Is 10 months too early?
@GuideGrowTV 4 жыл бұрын
10 months is definitely not too early! The earlier the better. It is a lifetime access so you will be able to refer to it whenever you like www.guideandgrow.com/workshops
@piabyron Жыл бұрын
Hi Sylvia, when it comes to offering a choice - I'm finding this challenging with my 2-year old. When I offer the "would you like to *this* or would you like to *this*", he ignores the question.. or says yes OR no to both options... It seems these two-choice-statements aren't appropriate for his age yet or the choices I'm offering aren't acceptable to him. Any thoughts or alternatives so that I can still offer him choice and request his help in a respectful way? Thanks!
@GuideGrowTV Жыл бұрын
Hi Pia, if the choices are not getting a response then you can always help them by making the choice and stating, "I can see you're having a hard time choosing, I will choose' or you can simplify the choices and use one word or slow down the choices so the child has more time to process, they operate a lot slower than we do.
@brittanysadler9387 4 жыл бұрын
When my nephew (1 year old) comes over he repeatedly goes to my staircase and begins to try and crawl up and down the stairs even though he has been told no over and over. He smiles each time he is put down and makes his way to the stairs as quickly as possible. He has not been raised Montessori but what would be a Montessori form of discipline to try and prevent this? As he is getting older he seems to enjoy more and more, rebelling against what he is told to do.
@yesikhaatmadja4474 4 жыл бұрын
I’m interested in the answer for this too. My lo is 16mo n very much like this often times.
@haileyfulton566 3 жыл бұрын
Do the stairs with him or put a gate up
@familiasoda9083 2 жыл бұрын
He needs to do this, if you can't be with him in that moment you can offer two choices of what he can actually do, he is not being rebell he is perfecting a skill and stairs are a wonderful opportunity to practice and understand his body. I know this is kind of too late a response but maybe can still help you or others 😉
@laurawilliamson888 3 жыл бұрын
If a child is for example hurting another child or causing harm in an environment would it be acceptable to say something like "I can see your very angry but we can't hurt others. You've made*insert name* feel sad" if they were to continue the behaviour would it be wrong to say "I see your having trouble not hurting others. You will need to leave the room/sit on the sofa until you have calmed Down" this is what I do in certain situations when I'm just not listened to at all. Is this wrong? Also what would you do if you have a child who doesn't listen or respond at all. So you give them options and they just do not respond? Also giving real life consequences and they do not respond?
@GuideGrowTV 3 жыл бұрын
Hi there, so the way you are responding id definitely appropriate and doing the right thing, I would just change the language around 'you will need to leave the room or sit here until you have calmed down part' so rather than telling them they need to calm down kind of I would say 'I can see you're struggling not to hurt anyone, I need to keep them safe, let's go over here to have some time to calm or reflect on your feelings' so it's a very slight difference as you are WITH the child and together going to try and navigate those emotions rather then you need to sit here to calm down if that makes sense?
@classyteacherkb 5 жыл бұрын
What about children who horseplay? Or a child that is stubborn
@GuideGrowTV 5 жыл бұрын
Hi Kym! Great question so if a child is being strong willed and choosing not to select a choice then the instruction becomes a lot shorter and more direct so for e.g. "you're struggling to choose, car or I will have to help" (if they refuse to get in the car after you've acknowledged feelings and offered a choice", if they still don't then you state "I see you've chosen for me to help, I will have to carry you in". That way the child understands it was their choice and to take responsibility for their action. Hope this helps
@classyteacherkb 5 жыл бұрын
Guide & Grow TV thank you for the help!
@yeehuai3270 4 жыл бұрын
How about the child refuse to pack the toys away instead go and get a new toy to play?
@GuideGrowTV 4 жыл бұрын
@@yeehuai3270 hi there! So follow the above steps and acknowledge saying "You just don't want to pack away" then state your expectations "You can play with this (new toy) when you pack away (other one)" and offer a choice "You can do it or I can help you, you choose" and just place your hand on the new toy. You can also make it a game to pack away the other toy, like a race or who can find the yellow piece etc. So it is important to make it fun. You can also say "When you're ready", usually the child will decide to pack it up sooner than later.
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