Does your husband want you to watch porn? Watch Paul explain how porn can affect your marriage and for you to learn what's the real reason why you get married.
I'm going to try to help you see a bigger picture because if we just look at this surface topic you're not going to be able to improve your marriage and that's the whole idea behind what I do and The Marriage Foundation does. We want your marriage to be what you wanted it to be when you got married.
You wanted to be happier every day of your life and you wanted to experience unconditional love. Obviously, if your husband wants you to watch porn that neither of those two things is happening. You may be confused because societal knowledge right now is so far off track, it's ridiculous. The whole idea of sexuality in marriage has been so twisted that people -- well, I get
all kinds of questions about sex and marriage and it's a shame. Because if your marriage was functioning at the level that it should be functioning and it's a very deep spiritual institution
marriage. It's between souls, you're soul mates. You're a soul.
Your husband is a soul. Soul thinks in terms of angelic your soul and now you're descending to
the point of where your husband wants you to wallow in the mud with you and watch porn to regard sexuality in your marriage as entertainment, as a way to satisfy lustful bodily desires. There's nothing wrong with sex and marriage obviously, but it should be utilized to achieve a connection between your husband and you. Porn is taking you to the outer extreme of
sexuality and making it a lustful act reducing it.
Why does he want to do that?
It's simple because he's not getting what he needs from you in the realm of intimacy. I'm going to tell you straight forward. Men get married to women -- that's a different reason why women get married to men because they want to experience the unconditional loving behavior that they may or may not have received from their mother because it's a reflection of the divine and things are so screwed up in Western and even Eastern society right now. That sexual interaction that's
become a commodity.
Men are having to beg their wives for sex. Women are negotiating with their husbands around
sex. Women are complaining that their husband doesn't understand them because their husband wants sex. When the woman, when you have the power and you do, this power lies with you to allow your husband to experience a different level of sex with you that would be so
fulfilling for him that the lust would be left behind. You see, men go down to this urge. The physical urge because it gratifies them and releases the build-up that they're experiencing
physically when they should be regarding you, when your husband should be regarding you as an angel in his life, as the one who fulfills his need -- it's a real need for unconditional love.
How have you been expressing your unconditional love? By complaining to him? By making his life miserable and he doesn't listen to you and take care of your needs? By reducing him as a man? By complaint, criticism, condemnation? No.
He should not want you to watch porn with him but your attitude should be, what am I not doing for my husband? And your mind is going to go, "Well, I don't want to be giving him blowjobs or putting on these weird costumes and blah blah blah," and you shouldn't be. But you should be
fulfilling him at his heart using his sexual drive to come into your heart but as he invited into your heart.
Are you living as an ideal wife while he's asking you to watch porn?
That's not behaving as an ideal husband. But what about you, are you behaving as an ideal wife? So the big picture is what's missing now in this conversation you and I are having, and the big picture is simply, "How's your marriage?" I know the answer, it sucks. Why? I know the answer to that too and it's not really your fault and it's not your husband's fault. It's because we're not taught how to be married. Think about it. You don't just get a license to drive a car. You learn about cars and you learn how to drive them and you learn the rules for the road and then it's easy for most of us.
What do you think marriage is easier than driving a car less complicated?
Where did you get educated?
What do you know about marriage?
Why did you get married?
You got married to be happy. Did you know that? Did you know consciously that what the grand prize of marriage is? It's unconditional love. Did you know your marriage is supposed to get better every single day? Happier? What are you doing?
Marriage isn't a ride at a theme park where you strap in and, "Oh boy, here we go for a ride." You
have to do what you have to do to make a marriage happier to pull that unconditional love into the marriage.
Watch the video for more.
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