YOP. That's what it really comes down to.

Wise words

Mee too

I definitely want "We should have equal opportunity for evil for women." on a t-shirt, sweater and as a framed poster.

"i support women's rights but most importantly i support women's wrongs" vibe

🤣

Same, I’m still kind of confused whether I should just ghost her and focus on myself or maybe confront her but one is clear to me, she’s not a good person and I don’t want that kind of energy in my life

@@user-ff3ko4oz6l not sure. Personally, my confronting experience wasnt fruitful. I told this person repeatedly about their behavior and I was gas lighted each time. Examples of their responses- "oh (insert my name) , you know how much I love you! I tell everyone how smart and unique you are!!!" If I let them know the current status of our relationship and my feeling I 100% believe they would gaslight me again and then talk about me behind my back, in the form of being "concerned". Probably making me look like a big, sensitive baby. I also have the advantage of knowing this person for a long time (they are close family). They have been that way since childhood. I am not sanguine on them changing behavior. Also, I am not ghosting , I am semi ghosting:)

I'm in this boat. I tried semi ghosting but it still didn't stop them from saying awful stuff to me. So, after the latest blow-up I told them "at this point in my life I'm prioritising healthy relationships. I've sunk a lot of money into therapy and it's important that I choose people that make me feel safe and loved". Haven't heard or seen them since 🤷‍♀️ it made me sad that they didn't even seem to care about how I felt, but to be honest that was the most fitting end to the entire friendship. My life is so much more calm and happy now I can't even begin to describe it. Cut them off!!

This reminds me of a close member of my family. I'm semighosting them as well, and I do not share all my good news or actions with them, as I know they are always jealous, judging, and will put me down (while victimising themselves) or downplay my victories and happy moments. They don't value me truly, so I don't share myself with them. But I can't cut them off as they're family, and I do care about them. It's complex...

Why would you ever be friends with someone you couldn't share good news with?? How did you even get into this

yeah that part is definitly none negotiable but it is far from being the only reason you should cut a friendship short!

Perhaps they don't see you as a "high -vaule friend/ woman" hence they don't want what you have invested in AND treat you poorly

They don't respect other women so that treat men better

Wanted to comment the same thing

I have a friend who only goes for rich, dumb guys. Given that my boyfriend is a broke PhD student, I would put them in the same room without any fear whatsoever. However, she is a horrible person otherwise - judgemental, thieving, superficial, manipulative, etc etc.

Exactly what I was thinking!

It’s different. If you don’t trust them around your dog, it’s probably because they’re not responsible. Which is not a criteria for ending a friendship.

@@frenchgirl5878 yeah but the same does apply with children and partners because responsibility is important in relationship because you’re more likely to trust a responsible friend than an untrustworthy friend If they can’t be trusted then what’s stopping them from taking you for granted and lying to you?

I swear this sketch was written by a woman. The characters act like women. Female characters tend to act really odd when written by men. Generally speaking.

Mind blown! Thinking of narc-ish family members I'm always considering if there will be a "buffer" aka person around if/when I see them

oooooh riiiight

Gender is a construct

Can i be yours?

The magic of editing.

i have a similar friendship (she is my cousin but was my bestie) just like your friend she stayed the same like she is 15 or so but ive grown a lot and her bad behaviors remained. i couldnt separate her from my life but as time passes it gets worse. so based on my experience i think even if you tried to in maybe 5 years or 10 it would end atleast in both of your hearts. depends on her personality or behaviors. my cousin is jealous and insufferable so i cant keep being understanding forever. 🤷🏻‍♀️☹️

I’m exactly in the same position :( it’s really hard knowing what to do

I was in a very similar situation. I’m also 23 and I had to cut off a friend I’ve had for 10 years. She was not a good friend to me for the same reasons and she also took advantage of people. It was tough because I knew her for so long but it was the best decision for my mental health. I can see that you still care about your friend and I relate to that. The only thing we can do is give them that distance and hopefully they will realize what they need to work on. It’s important to focus on yourself and better your mental health now. Just know you’re not alone in this feeling ♥️

Hi, I have grown apart with my close kindergarten friend after 23 years of friendship and a perspective that is not often talked about but I think very important is the following. She might not be a particularly bad friend to you, but are you really a good friend to her? Is she wasting her time and energy on someone who tolerates her because of feelings of guilt/nostalgia or trying to avoid an uncomfortable conversation? Is she better off investing her time in other people? I think this was the case with me, I did not want to hurt her feelings but I think I did her more of a disservice by not being honest with her. I actually think this can be a kind of betrayal in some situations, just like staying in a romantic relationship with someone you don't want to be with anymore. Of course, it might be possible to move to a more casual relationship for old time's sake, to keep in touch once in a while or become friends again later in life. But I think the best way to achieve that is to be honest. This is a very though situation you are in, I hope you'll figure out what's best for you ♥️

@@7ScarletRoses love your perspective!

This is a great one!

Good point!

I am trusted with all my s/o's friends because I'm ugly lol

Same, I have a close friend like this and I’ve been beating myself up for being “too jealous” or “crazy possessive” over my partner but honestly she’s the problem why I don’t trust her. Because she’s acting suspicious and shady even though she has a boyfriend too. And recently I’ve had a shady situation with her and my partner that cleared my vision. I now know she can’t be trusted

Believe me, one day they or future friends will realize how good and loyal of a friend you are and praise you for always being there. You stay true to who you are and good things will come to you. 🪬

Eh idk....the best in people is usually not who they really are. Because we're usually being our average, not our best

Sounds to me like you just wanted to be around other people from the beginning, but you invited her out of courtesy. If she was a good friend why invite her to an event and be around other people?

levels? can you explain?

@@louera she said "level 10 chaos" so not just normal chaos, it was level 10 chaos.

U need to drop her for YOUR mental health

Sorry that's happening. I had so many drafts of letters I wanted to send a certain friend when I was in a similar situation, but I was always overthinking how to be more direct that she needed to change for us to remain friends. But it inevitably blew up. I had felt that moment coming for a year or two and talked to a therapist as well. It was kind of a relief to see that relationship combust in flames. If someone has been a close friend, I think it's hard to actually ghost or semi-ghost -- you have to break up with them.

Sometimes you can trust them with your cat but not your physical health! Or ❤

Relatable

i was expecting it to be "your pet."

Or "your phone"

It is not about the partner. It is the truth about her being hostile towards you. It is the intention itself that is off putting.