Party Guest Etiquette: DOs and DON'Ts for Dinners & More

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Күн бұрын

Here are some helpful tips on how you can put your best foot forward as a party guest: gentl.mn/party-guest-etiquette
#party #etiquette #notsponsored
SHOP THE VIDEO:
→ Caramel & Dark Burgundy Stripe Socks: gentl.mn/caramel-burgundy-str...
→ Roberto Ugolini - Oxford: gentl.mn/roberto-ugolini-oxfo...
GUIDES YOU DON’T WANT TO MISS:
→ Business Casual Explained: gentl.mn/business-casual-attire1
→ Ultimate Table Manners Guide: gentl.mn/table-etiquette-mann...
→ How To Drink Like A Gentleman: gentl.mn/drink-like-gentleman
→ First Impressions 101: gentl.mn/introduce-yourself-o...
→ How To Get To Know Someone: gentl.mn/get-to-know-someone-1
VIDEO CREDITS:
→ Scriptwriter: Jack Collins & Teresa C. Schneider
→ Camera: Graham Zima
→ Editing: Chris Dummer
→ Visual Supervision: Preston Schlueter
→ United Artists
→ NBC
IMAGE CREDITS:
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00:00 Party Guest Etiquette Introduction
Whether it’s cocktails, dinner at a colleague's or friend’s house, or maybe even a neighborhood barbeque, attending a party can be a wonderful occasion for many of us. But there’s no denying that being invited as a guest to a party can be a source of anxiety, too.
01:10 Why Does Etiquette Matter?
Until the overall casualization of society that began in the mid-to-late 20th century, an invitation was both a request and instruction all in one, with hardly any possibility for misinterpretation.
Nowadays, as society has become less strict with these things, an invitation to a party can be more easily misconstrued, often leading hosts to provide a more lengthy request in order to explain their wishes for the event. But, even with a well-thought-through invitation and diligence to follow it, you’ve still got to navigate the party itself!
03:22 Pre-Party Advice: 1. RSVP
04:20 2. Respect The Invitation
06:16 3. It's OK To Ask Questions About The Party
07:09 4. Understand Guest List Parameters
08:13 5. Follow The Dress Code
09:53 6. Arrive On Time
With the pre-party planning squared away, let’s move on to the second part of today’s video and discuss foolproof event etiquette.
11:04 At the Party: 1. Greetings & Goodbyes
11:35 2. Proper Shoe Etiquette
12:46 3. Gift Giving
14:10 4. Supervise Your Kids
15:05 5. Table Manners
16:15 6. Drink In Moderation
17:09 7. Respect The Party Perimeter
17:57 8. Courteous Conversation
19:00 9. Ask for Introductions
20:03 10. As the Event Ends, Respect Your Host's Wishes
So, as we bring this party to a close, which of our tips have you found most helpful? Are there any you think we missed? And which tips are ones you’ll be employing at your next party? Let us know in the comments!
21:10 Outfit Rundown

Пікірлер: 114

@theworldasiknowit.5751 Жыл бұрын

It's refreshing to believe that there are still adults who enjoy ties, cocktail talk, nice socks, and maybe a small thank you later, after things have settled down for the night. A well attended party (on both sides of the table), is a joy we don't get much of here in the great frozen North. All the best. Thank you, again.

@theworldasiknowit.5751 Жыл бұрын

@@pepepepito623 Yes. We just spent two weeks in Orlando, returned with a creeping death nasal infection, but it has helped us relive the parties, and take time to enjoy seeing Raphael expose himself again! :D

@jacquelynbrickman2982 Жыл бұрын

Thank you. One you may mention is to leave your pet at home. This needs to be said sometimes.

@devansh1727 Жыл бұрын

Nice outfit, Preston!

@Jimfrenchde 11 ай бұрын

After I attended a wedding, I remember that the host thanked me for showing up. He meant it. So even if a guest has spent a lot of time and money preparing for an event, it is actually a nice thing to attend this event, as long as you act appropriately. Preston, thank you for this video.

@bewareofpigeons Жыл бұрын

Charming, graceful and urbane advice: I realise how much I miss semi-formal social life, such as a drinks party with a time to arrive,a time to leave, and the certainty that people can be expected to observe etiquette and that the art of conversation will be practised.

@jimmobley533 Жыл бұрын

Recently, I went to a cookout at our neighbors across the street. They had only moved in a few months before the cookout. We had been in the neighborhood about a year longer than them. We were surprised to see how many of our neighbors were at the party, many of whom we had never met. My wife asked our host about the names of a few of the guests. She told my wife that she had no idea. Apparently, her 3rd grade daughter had invited her entire school bus stop. The host was surprised by the big turnout.

@themoderndandy713 Жыл бұрын

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why we never invite others without explicitly being told we can (and how many) in the invitation. I wonder how many guests went hungry due to that! If they were prepared, then that's definitely above-and-beyond hosting.

@mattbellal Жыл бұрын

Preston is so cool, I want to have his eloquence and prestance... I hope they will make a video about it because I tend to stutter when I speak english as it is not my first language

@therealgigglebop Жыл бұрын

Read a lot, particularly of classic English literature, and like Preston, speak slowly and deliberately. I suspect that this is a learned behavior since Preston has (as mentioned in his biographical video) cerebral palsy.

@mattbellal Жыл бұрын

@@therealgigglebopthat is what i do! I self taugh myself english at 14, and now that I am 16 i can read more advanced books like Shakespear and Virginia Woolf, I think the problem comes from me not being able to talk to someone native (im french) but I try my best with out loud reading

@kittytrail Жыл бұрын

@@mattbellal try to get penpals from various english speaking countries, that is pretty good to work on your handwriting and vocabulary while giving more time to think about how you want to phrase your letters. _keyboardpals_ are fine too but it's usually faster and hence let you think about your message for less time. depending where you are in France, there's lots of english or american people, even in the countryside and some might be open to conversation unless they only want to hone their own french skills. students are another possibility but not very bright and quite superficial for the most part... 😼

@dandiehm8414 Жыл бұрын

@@therealgigglebop Preston was also much stiffer and hesitant in his first few videos. He has gotten much better with practice and time.

@tahmid4718 Жыл бұрын

I definitely like the 'how do you know the host?' line. I'll be sure to use that sometime haha

@sebastiankarlsson7358 Жыл бұрын

Would love more of this kind of content.

@midorimorino8090 Жыл бұрын

After this video I really feel like organizing a party with my friends. Good video, thank you so much 👏

@barrymurphy1337 Жыл бұрын

Loving your shirt Preston.

@Michael_R1957 Жыл бұрын

Someone who has a disability may want to politely ask the host if the party venue is accessible. Just a thought. Thanks, Preston. Another great video.

@gentlemansgazette Жыл бұрын

As a person with a disability myself, I completely agree! Thanks for watching. - Preston

@Kiterpuss 11 ай бұрын

Also, asking about the menu. You never know what allergens someone might need to be aware of, or even religious restrictions to certain foods. Most folks with food restrictions are more than happy to bring their own food to an occasion if it's appropriate; they just need to know.

@mattbellal Жыл бұрын

Great video as always

@krunoslavkovacec1842 11 ай бұрын

16:27 That tracksuit is surprisinglly stylish.

@rkbaker722 Жыл бұрын

"in exactly *007* words" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@michaelmason4206 Жыл бұрын

Great video! Super well done.

@docsnider8926 Жыл бұрын

I always appreciate if a time to leave the party is set in the invitation. Often guest tend not to leave, even when the party is over. „Coaches at 1.00 a.m.“

@Methodsaimon Жыл бұрын

if it's fun it's fun!

@NapoIeoneBuonaparte Жыл бұрын

This came out before my birthday on July 1st, amazing timing

@Molach101 Жыл бұрын

12:14 - I heard an anecdote from a butler once of a particular English aristocrat he served. Whenever he visited someone's home he would always have a little bag brought with him containing a pair of monogrammed velvet slippers so he wouldn't trek dirt into the house from his shoes. There can't have been much dirt considering those shoes were always maintained and polished to a mirror shine by the butler but it was all about the gesture

@themoderndandy713 Жыл бұрын

I actually do this! I have a pair of velvet Albert slippers with a fleur-de-lis embroidered on it. Whenever I'm visiting someone's home, I take my slippers with me. This completely solves the issue of me not wanting to walk around in a suit and socks, but also wanting to respect others' homes and keep them clean - even if the hosts say they don't mind.

@Greggory1987 Жыл бұрын

I loved this video especially around asking questions of the host in advance. I am deathly allergic to cats. Therefore, this is a question I must ask the host for any event I attend.

@bngr_bngr Жыл бұрын

No pets allowed at my parties 😂😂😂

@FlyingRedTailHawk Жыл бұрын

I feel so sorry for you. I also put in a similar question about food allergies. Yours is another great one.

@angelmessenger8240 8 ай бұрын

@@FlyingRedTailHawk Yes, I', coeliac and allergic to dairy so can be a difficult guest to cater to.

@AmyAnnetteHenion Жыл бұрын

It's clear you guys have lots of fun shooting B-roll. Love it!

@thisissoeasy Жыл бұрын

Truly brilliant video, in every respect! Thank you and, salutations from Outback Australia. Rolf

@craft-o-matic399 Жыл бұрын

❤Excellent advice as always Preston! Outstanding! Lisa

@gentlemansgazette Жыл бұрын

Thank you, Lisa!

@gentlemaninjapan1994 Жыл бұрын

I haven't seen one but is there a video of how to host a party? I'm about to host one myself so those tips would be gladly accepted! Love your work Preston! Whenever your face pops up on my notifications I have to watch

@JDvintagemi Жыл бұрын

Yet another great informative video. I have an idea for another one. What about automobile etiquette? Riding with in-laws went to open doors where to park, things like that. How to interact with valet attendant. How much to tip.

@BigVince80bce Жыл бұрын

Oh my god you're such a life saver. I have a formal party tonight, what luck!

@zenitram2895 Жыл бұрын

I'm glad you mentioned bringing a bottle of wine as a gift. I was brought up being told it was the polite thing to do and it's something I've done my entire adult life. Quite honestly, I've never expected a thank you note for doing so, as I see it as an expression of thanks for the invitation.

@firebolt2775 11 ай бұрын

I always bring Pepsi

@FlyingRedTailHawk Жыл бұрын

Great and helpful channel

@newoleets6519 Жыл бұрын

This ia ironic, today I'm going to a birthday party! 😅

@jonathankniffen8304 10 ай бұрын

Etiquette content is always welcome

@LukeS117 Жыл бұрын

Does anyone else just wanna hangout casually with Preston?

@AppealToHeaven Жыл бұрын

Me!

@FlyingRedTailHawk Жыл бұрын

He seems very nice and someone who would be a good friend.

@viclucyzia Жыл бұрын

Freeloader 😂. Yes you can spot them from far away with a mountain of food on their plate and getting several helpings. Of course no host wants their guests to be hungry and hope their food is tastely prepared but the host wants all guests to have a share. On my side I restrict myself too much especially in black tie or any suit as I panic to get any stains. . It's hard to keep the pleasant line.

@raghav9000 Жыл бұрын

I usually find it difficult to introduce myself and have conversation at parties, which usually leads me being a wallflower among the guests.

@themoderndandy713 Жыл бұрын

I both used to and still sometimes find myself struggling with this issue. I often find myself in an awkward position of lingering - I have nothing of insight to say, there are no openings in the conversation, but I'd still like to be in the moment. I personally recommend looking around the party for other people minding their own business and introducing yourself to them. You'll be able to tell whether they want to be left alone or not pretty quickly. If they do want to chat, you may find yourself having a highly engaging and thoughtful exchange. My experience has been that the most intelligent and original guests are often the wallflowers.

@MrDanielEarle Жыл бұрын

I'll need that cake video, please

@markbutler9442 Жыл бұрын

The issue I have seen as of late is the lack of dress code on wedding invitations. I've been to a couple of weddings lately and both younger couples and neither had a stated dress codes. I had to ask in both cases. Part of the move to more casual, less formal society I guess.

@yuma420 Жыл бұрын

If you actually knew the person, you'd have known what to wear. If you don't know them that well, why even bother rocking up to their wedding?

@briang530 Жыл бұрын

Weddings (especially those that require guests to travel) without dress codes on the invitation are a cause of a bit of consternation. This because you then basically have wobble through casually finding out what the wedding party is going to be wearing so as to be in that ballpark whilst not outdressing the couple.

@danelisslow3269 11 ай бұрын

@@yuma420how do you figure that? I wear jeans and t shirts everyday, but I would be offended if someone showed up to my wedding in jeans.

@davidnorth9390 Жыл бұрын

This was fun, --and helpful. Not quite a party, --but FUN! ;-)

@FlyingRedTailHawk Жыл бұрын

You should probably talk about office parties do's and don't.

@susannah1066 Жыл бұрын

I ended up hating Christmas as my 2 brothers [& girlfriends] would just drink, and smoke-and I would have to supervise their kids to stop them wrecking my parents house [who were busy in the kitchen] I was glad when they left.

@Elizabeth-yg2mg 7 ай бұрын

Sounds like my "family".

@themoderndandy713 Жыл бұрын

I appreciate the nod to the fact that wedding and funeral dress codes are much more important than arbitrary gathering ones. I'm not going to ditch the suit and tie because someone decided the party was "smart casual," which is actually a dress code extremely common in Colorado fine dining restaurants. I'll respect what a bride, groom, or deceased person wants, but otherwise, I bluntly don't care about people demanding I dress exactly how they want just because they only feel comfortable in life when everyone around them is exactly the same. We should be celebrating individuality, not crushing it for the sake of judgementalists! If I always adhered to the dress code in Colorado, I think I'd wear a suit a couple times a year at most. Bah humbug with that.

@dandiehm8414 Жыл бұрын

I always looked at a dress code as the MINIMUM required to attend.

@themoderndandy713 Жыл бұрын

@@dandiehm8414 I would prefer that, yes. Thankfully, most of my friends don't really care about it. I suppose that whether it's the minimum or expectation depends on whose perspective it is - and I don't really care about catering to those who see it as the latter.

@themoderndandy713 3 ай бұрын

@luke5100 Ah - I am on the opposite side than what you imagine. I wear suits and ties to everyday situations. I wear white tie to the opera. I agree that it brings out the best in me in social gatherings; I feel rather uncomfortable in casual clothes, and so I dislike those silly dress codes that serve no real purpose.

@dandiehm8414 Жыл бұрын

17:10 its always a good video when Elvis is in it!

@zachpower2192 Жыл бұрын

I really appreciate these videos you make on behaviour. I know that many neurodivergent people, such as some of my students at school, would find these tips and observations very valuable. For most people, these sorts of social cues and expectations are learned easily, quickly, and naturally. However, for some neurodivergent people, especially those on the autism spectrum (for example), it can be tough to interpret cues and expectations. Having things delineated and expressed in such a clear way would really help some people internalize what others know instinctively ☺️

@MrWolf-xk8sl 11 ай бұрын

Whenever I'm invited for a dinner I'm always bringing some wine or some homemade food for the host and guests

@Smithy67 Жыл бұрын

Excellent ✔️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

@IANJCAMBELcali 3 ай бұрын

In Germany on time 5 minutes before , in Spain it’s a 4 hour window of time to arrive .

@bradleykerswill7706 Жыл бұрын

Thank you for the video. I enjoyed it. I do have a question. Regarding if it is polite to ask if someone else is invited, do you think this is appropriate if you are asking if your wife or significant other is also invited?

@MommyMinty Жыл бұрын

I tend you wear a dress shirt, sweater and slacks for family events.

@FlyingRedTailHawk Жыл бұрын

You might want to talk about going out to dinner (family, friends, business) related

@patrickferguson5962 Жыл бұрын

5:49 “Remember that you shouldn’t be looking to change the party parameters, as much as just exercising your right not to attend.” I wonder if the “right to not attend” is an inalienable right, or if it must be fought for, like your right to party. :)

@angelmessenger8240 8 ай бұрын

I would normally take a gift even if it's a jar of homemade jam for friends and family or a bottle of wine for a formal occasion.

@Girlgamssilver Жыл бұрын

The conversation segment. In today's volatile environment it's sure that some one will defend a point vehemently

@yuma420 Жыл бұрын

Don't have this problem because I mix with individuals, who, despite our differing opinions, are still gracious to one another. I would never put myself in a situation where I am dealing with boors. Find a new circle of friends.

@bngr_bngr Жыл бұрын

I’m Latino, there is always plenty to eat and drink at my party. Never can run out of food or drinks.

@luisfeliperamosparada6884 Жыл бұрын

Can I use a tuxedo ir a morning coat with a cravat?

@luxpursuits 6 ай бұрын

Sven is an odd ball. He's got a weird smile!

@christianpedersen1857 Жыл бұрын

can you make a video about andre rieu's clothes

@ZoomZoom-ng6sn Жыл бұрын

Some host don't even control their hyper dogs indoors. Also, a lot of guest usually don't bother to use the available beverage coasters on the tables. There would always be a guy or two dressed up ridiculously. LOL or not?

@spaghettiking7312 Жыл бұрын

I want cake now.🤤

@plonchyvideos7456 Жыл бұрын

You forgot to mention that as a guest, you do not sit yourself at the head of the table. That's the place for the host and hostess.

@FlyingRedTailHawk Жыл бұрын

Yes, very nice and they didn't mention that the host or hostess gives the toast and if they don't a guest has to propose a toast saluting the host/hostess. It is done when the beverage is served at the beginning of the meal or before the dessert.

@RT65CB-SWL Жыл бұрын

What is the polite etiquette for replying to RSVP? Hand-written, SMS/text/email or verbally to the host/hostess (i.e. phone/face-to-face)?

@themoderndandy713 Жыл бұрын

Generally, etiquette dictates to respond by kind. A handwritten invitation begets a handwritten RSVP. An email invitation begets an email RSVP. A text or by-phone invitation begets a text or by-phone RSVP. I would be careful responding to non-in-person invitations with in-person RSVPs; some may be using written replies as a system to remember who's coming and who isn't. Considerate hosts who send handwritten invitations will often include an RSVP note in their mail, in which you can mark whether you'll be going or not (and if you're not, you still must check and send the "no"), along with any dietary restrictions for you to fill out. These considerate hosts will also use pre-paid postage. All of this especially applies for weddings. Handwritten invitations are generally used for formal occasions. Email invitations are often used for professional, club, and more distant relationships. Phones and texts are best for everyday get-togethers with friends. Any time you receive an invitation, you must respond within 48 hours with a yes or no. Traditionally, if someone invites you to a wedding, you have a good relationship with them, and you decline, you should send them a gift, anyway. For strangers and estranged family, don't bother. I hope all of this helps!

@danelisslow3269 11 ай бұрын

If you're late just say "the party doesn't start till I get here." Works every time.

@drip369 Жыл бұрын

Noice!

@valor101arise Жыл бұрын

You all are The Jeeves to the Woosters

@jimmobley533 Жыл бұрын

Always bring a gift. Bottle of wine is always easy.

@17G3daf Жыл бұрын

Hello I would be super exited If you talk about any subject about Sweden in a video!

@a.s.j.g6229 Жыл бұрын

In my house I generally take my shoes off if I’m wearing trainers or work shoes, but dress shoes are fine inside, it would be weird to have someone take off dress shoes.

@dandiehm8414 Жыл бұрын

Agreed. I would NEVER ask anyone to remove their shoes. I think it is rude to do so. I pretty much do not go into people's homes when that is a requirement.

@mph7282 Жыл бұрын

Removing shoes is a tricky one. In some cultures it’s expected to remove your footwear. In others, including how I grew up, it would be the height of rudeness to remove your shoes in someone else’s home unless asked to. Visual clues, or some understanding of the host’s preference, is key.

@georgelush1998 Жыл бұрын

I also agree. We recently had a dinner party at our house. A guest asked, “Shoes on or off?” I replied, “On, please.” She responded, “Oh thank goodness.” I respect that other cultures have different customs. As an American I would never ask my guests to remove their shoes. When visiting people’s homes where I know I will be asked to remove my shoes, I bring along a pair of travel slippers that have never been worn outside and ask my hosts if I may wear those. I find parading around someone’s house in stocking feet (or God forbid bare feet) uncouth.

@dandiehm8414 Жыл бұрын

@@georgelush1998 100% Agree. As an American I would not think to ask others to remove their shoes any more than I would to ask them to remove their shirt. But I respect other countries have other traditions.

@themoderndandy713 Жыл бұрын

@@georgelush1998I take a pair of velvet Albert slippers for just that reason whenever I visit someone's house. It removes any pressure on the host(s), and it looks quite elegant while doing so.

@bustysaintclair Жыл бұрын

i usually say no children in my invites

@iainmc9859 Жыл бұрын

What, no drunken punch up between different branches of the family ... you're just not drinking enough whisky 😉

@GBPackFan62 2 ай бұрын

With regard to Point #4, I recently had an experience that illustrated, to me, that there are quite a few people who either do not understand this or just don't care. We're planning a 60th party for my sister's upcoming birthday. She composed the list of people that she wants to attend and passed it along to me and the other person who is assisting with the planning. The total number of invited guests ended up being 55 people. One of my late cousin's widow was an invitee. She texted me several days ago, essentially saying that she invited a relative (the granddaughter of one of my late uncles) WITHOUT first asking if it was okay to do so, which, as is illustrated here, it isn't. I'm now trying to figure out a nice way to let her know that her actions were not within proper etiquette parameters, without calling out her ignorance of said etiquette. Which also brings something else to mind, what, if any, is a proper/best way to politely uninvite a guest?

@henrylemelay5436 5 ай бұрын

Dutch:een ober herken je aan een blad champagne glazen maar ook aan zijn black tie met sjaalkraag.Deze is ook voor goochelaars,croupiers,presentatoren en musici. De piekkraag is voor gasten.