"The reason why the Narc decided to leave you is because they couldnt control you" So true. They didnt "reject" you nor that you were not "good enough" You were too strong for them. Be proud.

The only healthy relationship with a narcissist is no relationship. Zero contact.

My favorite narcissistic apology: "I'm sorry you feel that way."

It was hard for me to leave a narcissist, but I finally did , it felt so good

Narcissists don't make you feel safe.

If all their exes are crazy and they always seem to be the victim, RUN!!! You’ll be next😢

33 years married to a narcissist? Now nearly divorced? Cannot believe it took so long to realise?? Now on my own enjoying my quiet life it's amazing

Narcissists are charismatic manipulative trainwrecks...thanks lovely lady!

Dealing with a narc is so draining, one minute everything is great and they telling you they love you . The next minute your being ignored 🤦🏽‍♀️ I hate it here ‼️

If you are a nice kind person who cares about others, you are bait for these types

They don't discard you they set you free.....

My son’s father is a narcissist and I was with him for 8 years. After chasing something so unattainable for so long you lose yourself. It took a lot to free myself and I’m still recovering every day.

I swear you just described my entire marriage from day one!!!!22 years of misery and all sorts of abuse but I’m divorced 6 months now!!!

1) They perceive sex differently 2) They need to be idealized by you 3) They are right and you are wrong 4) They believe that they know you better than you know yourself 5) They don't want to communicate about sex 6) Your needs and emotions don't matter 7) There is something wrong with you 8) You will get devalued, ghosted or ignored 9) They want to be in control at all times 10) They will lie 11) They are not kind people 12) They will never apologize 13) You won't connect with them emotionally

Working on self love is worth every second. I was abused for over a year by a narcissist. Never again. Most painful period of my entire life

I was with someone who stopped saying I love you, stopped talking about us only about work. He only ever was talking about work. Never about us. No more dates. No more salutations except to the kids we shared. Had a business, bought a house, never married me. It was all about him and his life and his outlook. I was just a passenger in HIS journey.

From the narcissists I've known they appear to me as people who never really matured in emotional feelings and in relationships with others. They are controlled by their own insecurities.

They want you to be submissive to them . Or to humiliate you. Or control you . Run away . Fast please!

This video absolutely nails it. It’s unbelievable. I broke up with my girlfriend yesterday after she withdrew intimately, physically and mentally. It’s been one of the most painful months of my life. Everything was going completely fine then wham…the light shut off. She didn’t have time to see me, didn’t want to talk over the phone and her text messages were limited to ‘morning’ and ‘good night’. This is someone who ripped my clothes multiple times a day for the first six months then pulled it all away gradually. Now I’m the one to blame. On a positive note, I’ve found God again. It made me realize that I need to build the foundations of my life on rock vs sand. To feel unconditional love and acceptance and can’t seem to find anywhere else. Tears were shed but I felt whole. I felt loved. Thank God.

Things to do. Number 1. Love them from a distance. Number 2. Walk away ,Block and Delete them. Continue working on yourself and let go of what didn't serve you. Amen. God Bless you all. Stay strong. God is with you all.

Never tell anyone about your past, it's behind you. I only look forward.

No empathy, No humility, Not able to take ownership for their behavior and consequently not willing to do the real work.🙏

Four years of chasing the carrot on a stick, only to be rejected, cheated on, shoved out of the relationship and our home, and rather than showing any empathy for the massive hurt that she caused she then tried to assassinate my character where we both worked, filed court orders against me without cause, filed charges against me, sought to have me fired and jailed, and was almost successful. And it took me 14-years to finally come to grips with who she was and what she was.

I was in trauma bonding cycle for 12 years. It was very hard for me to leave. I was love addicted, and lonely for most of that 12 years. Luckily I was able to leave and escape unscaved. The reason for this whole ordeal was childhood trauma and growing up with a narcissist. I am free quite few years and my life is so much better. I am healing and I am thankfull to be alone.

My narcissist partner was a wonderful lover. To himself. To me, was the worst I ever had.

Trauma bonding is actually a spell from hell.

Watch for pushing your sexual boundaries early on. The last Narc I was with was constantly asking me for sexual things that were insanely inappropriate within weeks of knowing him. I never once felt close to him. Also watch for how quickly they move away from you or turn their back on you after the deed is done. They are lazy, demanding and mechanical. He was all over dating apps the moment I couldn’t offer complete focus on his needs. He was completely empty inside.

So after 23 years of living with a narcissist, my soon to be ex-husband and having a small child with him, I have realized within the past few years what has actually been going on this entire relationship. So much emotional abuse, cheating, the micro affairs with younger women who stroke his ego, the gaslighting, blame shifting and stonewalling. It is like waking up from one nightmare into another, and I started thinking about sex, and how that has always been something that has been a very strange topic with us and also some thing we are never able to really discuss. I realized a lot earlier on in our relationship sex was different, but it slowly changed. He is attentive in bed and will make sure that I am satisfied but as soon as it is over, he is gone. He leaves the room. He goes out to watch TV or play video games. He needs to almost detach from what just happened. There is no cuddling there is no snuggling there’s no spooning no kissing no sweet talk pillow talk nothing at all. There is absolutely no emotion and it’s almost like a robot. I always thought that I was lucky because he paid attention to me but then afterwords I would always feel empty like something was just not right and now I’m realizing that this is what has been going on and I don’t feel so alone anymore.

Anyone who is kind and giving is bait for the narcissist. RUN don't walk away.

They get you with the lovebombing and you are always trying to chase that, always trying to get back how they used to be.....it never comes back except in crumb form. It's so twisted. The only way you will ever rid yourself of them is if you block them on everything so you can move on & heal. If you do not do that...they will come back over and over and the whole vicious cycle happens again, without the lovebombing/golden period. Trust your intuition, you know when someone isn't good for you. Disengage from them and do not ever look back. I promise you, you will heal and get better if you do.

PEACE IS PRICELESS

Having sex with a narcissist was the most lonely experience ever. Love bombing phase ended quickly and then it became a sexless marriage. When I was 5 months pregnant, he said “You are not attractive to me anymore.”

I used to have the impulse to cry right after sex, for "no reason". I had no idea this was a common thing with people in narcissistic relationships.

They get validation by seeing you hurt..... They know they hurt but don't care....

Having sex with a Narc was the most unclimatic and simply the worst experience I have ever had.. it started me thinking about who this creature really was. IT WAS THAT BAD!

I've been done with narcissists for about 8 years now. I'm no contact with my narcissistic parents and quit my job as a security guard since I kept getting one after another narcissistic managers who were usually ex cops. My body couldn't tolerate the toxicity anymore. After 8 years of no contact I've healed in so many ways it's beyond what I could have imagined.

My early life would have been so different, if I’d had this knowledge. I was a narc magnet.

They leave you feeling alone and disconected No kind of intimacy just emptiness Run for your life !

Sexlessness. Sharing a bed with someone who doesn’t acknowledge you are a sexual being hurts so much. I was in a sexless marriage for years. Being a woman with a high libido, I felt inadequate. Worst I feel invisible. The man who was “supposed” to want me, just didn’t. We talked about it many times, more than I can recall now. It was always me. I wanted too much - once a week was too much for him. I didn’t initiate - he was always complaining of headaches, stomaches, always stressed, always tired. I was too sexual - when being subtle doesn’t work, what is next? Explicitly saying I wanted sex. Oh but then it was not appropriate. Conversations would end up with him saying he didn’t feel desired or I made him feel emasculated because he didn’t want sex as much as I did. Yeah, it was always me. I could never win. While we were dating we would have a decent amount of sex, it was good. The first huge red flag was not having sex in our honeymoon - which I ignored. It rapidly decrease to once a week, then every other week. Years gone by it was months in between, by the time we divorced it was over a year with no sex. I cried myself to sleep more times that I can count. I didn’t understand what was wrong with me. Was I that undesirable? Was I repulsive? After those conversations, I just stopped trying, initiating, mentioning sex. We were still loving - holding hands, hugging, kissing - but sex was off the table. He then cheated on me. Swore he had sex only 4 times in a year (or more) long affair. It didn’t matter. For years my self worth was damaged by him, years of low self esteem, years of feeling less of a woman, the marriage that was more than over, waiting in hospice, really ended. Funny how things are, I asked him for a divorce, he manipulated me into staying, next day his infidelity came to light. I was out as soon as I could. Best thing of my life. Additionally, That feeling when your partner cheated and you don't have the courage to leave him / her so you just death with the pain and live everyday asking questions about your worth. This pain is different from the cheating one_living and seeing him everywhere anticipating when he or she do it again. The best thing is to hire a private investigator Metaspyhub@gmail. com to help you spy on their cellphone remotely just like he did for me...

Why didn't I have KZfaq 30 years ago! I spent 30 years with a Narcissistic and was abused physically and emotionally! In the first 2 years of marriage I tried to commit suicide 4 times because he devalued Me so badly. I'm on the healing journey now and he is far away from Me now. I will never trust anyone again! Its going to take the rest of My life to get over this. Thank you for the valuable information. 🙏 ❤ 🙌 Praise God for opening My eyes to the abuse and getting Me out!

Moral of the story is : narcisst has childhood trauma that he/she shall never get over 👍✨

Sex is a weapon to them. My ex partner has withheld it from me to punish me. I've felt so unloved for so many years.

Everything we own is his ,mine never ours . He always says . His his his .

Nailed It! “Talking about sex isn’t sexy”. “No, I’m not in love with you. We don’t really have anything in common” (after living together for 2 years!)

1. They perceive sex differently--it is a conquest/control. 2. They need to be idealized and adored by you--best you've ever had, etc. 3. They are absolutely right, and you are absolutely wrong. Your point-of-view does not matter. (My parents) 4. They believe that they know you better than you know yourself. Tells you what you are, what you think. (My Mom) 5. They won't want to communicate about sex. No two-way communication. 6. Your needs and emotions do not matter. (My husband) 7. There's something wrong with you. (They will have you committed, too.) They are top dog. 8 You will be devalued, invalidated, and ignored. (And ghosted) They are not getting the same high from you as before, and so they distance themselves......draw you in and drop you. 9. They want to be in control all the time. They will drop you permanently when they see that they cannot control you. 10. They will lie. 11. They are not kind. They do not care about pleasing you. They will distance themselves after sex. True intimacy is not possible for them. 12. They do not apologize. Their apologies will feel insincere. 13. You won't truly connect with them emotionally, no true intimate emotional connection. 1) You might become addicted to them. 2) Trauma bonding has a role to play--most often seen in individuals who have experienced abuse or neglect during childhood. 3) They do not change. We all have some narcissistic traits. 4) A codependent needs to be needed. Negative emotions are never negative. They are warning you to get away. (This is why I have disengaged from my sisters, daughter, and parents).

I briefly got back with my ex. I realized he was a narc. As a young woman I didn’t know but as a middle aged woman, I saw the signs clearly. Talked about himself, didn’t want to hear my POV, sexually selfish and was rude. Talking to him went nowhere, so I stopped talking to him, period. No regrets.

Remarkable how long one’s arms can stretch when keeping a distance from these people. Too much time and energy invested, our humanity, gentleness, and soulful growth ebbs away. Images and symbols replace beliefs and action. Spectator replaces engagement. I nurture myself back to love with a walk in the woods, eyes set on trees, the sky, and water. Helps regain balance.

Constant adoration is what I had to give my father. I can't even fathom how many times I had to say "wow" or "thank you" to him for what he just did for me that I neither needed or wanted or could even barely tolerate anymore. Thank you for the awareness.

PAY ATTENTION to these signs!!! This pretty much sums up my last relationship! I had no idea what narcissism was. In the end I ended up feeling completely devalued, unwanted and dejected by the whole experience

A really good breakdown of what it's like being in a relationship and having sex with a narcissist.They will use sex as a control weapon against you, ie I didn't like how you behaved this weekend, so I didn't have sex with you. The love bombing also accompanies the sex. Beware the rush to intimacy and premature talk of love, marriage, moving in right away, soul mates, promises to buy you stuff. The trauma bond is tough to break. Treat it like an addiction.

There are many different signs. These include spending time on phone that was not spent previously, withholding sex from you, withdrawing in communication with you, agitation or anger over Petty stuff or making up situations to get angry or agitated over, lying, being secretive in any way, randomly spending more time caring for and pampering oneself such as putting on makeup or wearing cologne or coloring hair etc. Any type of changed behavior that is not aimed at pleasing or benefiting your relationship. With all of that though, follow your gut. your gut is telling you that something isn't right and it's telling you that this could or is happening, therefore listen to it. Just Free yourself from all of it! Run and don't look back. Go 100% no contact. The mental and emotional abuse is not okay at all! Do not bring anything up to her. Don't try to rationalize or have a conversation about anything. Don't let her know that you know she's in narcissist. All of that can cause a narcissistic rage. If you have not yet witnessed one of those just trust me that you don't want to! A narcissistic rage is beyond any rage I have ever seen or witnessed in my entire life. I am an army combat veteran and served front lines for a year and afghanistan. I have abuse going back from as long as I can remember, the first time in my personal memory is 2 years old. With everything I have been involved in, and my rape, other sexual abuse, their physical abuse, etc in narcissistic rage is by far the worst! If you need to contact your local police department and start a new contact order. No one can protect you like you can! free yourself from it all and move forward in your life. The minute you run and go no contact is the minute your life begins again. If need be seek out professional help. Therapy is the best thing I did for myself. The best gift I gave to me! The abuse is so deep and overwhelming that having a professional guide you through the steps of the healing process is extremely beneficial! Just remember, there is great strength in asking for help. There is great lack and strength or no strength at all in putting on a mask and hiding behind the opinions of society and pretending that you are okay! As human beings we all witness A Time In our lives where we are not okay! Those that heal, move past, and move forward, and have a brighter future are those who ask for help and do the work that is needed through the help! I'm so sorry you are going through this and I wish you the very best! Good luck! Always remember that you are stronger than you believe you are, you are worthy and deserving of better and always, and you are enough just the way you are and who you are today! Take this time for you! Get yourself again. Fix that meal that you're all time favorite, rent that movie you've been wanting to see, have a guys night out with your best friends, remodel a room in your home, go purchase that item you've been wanting to for so long, just do for yourself! Self-acceptance, self-love, and being able to forgive yourself is far more important than what anyone else can give to you! Believe in who you are! You deserve nothing less than that! You're not alone! Feel free to tag me in any other questions that you have! I'll help if I can. Additionally you can hire a cyber expert to help you get remote access to their phone so you can track them and monitor all of their activities without them knowing. You may locate the top cyber specialists locally at Digitalinvestigate@gmail. com, where you can engage a well-trained professional to assist you..........

31:48 yeah that uneasy uncomfortable feeling is exhausting they just constantly judge and critique you

At 66 years old and having seen phychologists, this is the first time that I understand what had been happening to me and why. Thank you so much.

Thank you for making this video, just experienced in the last situationship. My needs were not met nor respected. He became angered when I asked for my needs to be met. He also blamed me for his anger. He ignored my wants and desires. And at that moment I knew I can’t continue being involve with a narcissist.

I created a hypothesis on a trap that I have thought about. The trap helps us to know someone is a strong narcissist. What I mean by strong is they allow narcissist selfishness to come through and control others. This trap is where at least five days a week you have a 3-4 hour period where you cannot be contacted because you're studying or meditating or whatever it is you want to do. Make sure you tell the new person in your relationship this. Eventually everyone will pierce this but the narcissist will be emotionally upset because they will want to own you and that means they will invalidate you and demean you because of this two or three hour period. This is how you know to immediately break up and run like hell.

"Don't feel bad if you crave their attention and affection." Thank you for explaing what neurotransmitters are released and how it affects the mind and body. I wondered what was wrong with me, but as it turns out, this is completely normal. Now I feel empowered to continue to learn the healing process.

I'm literally crying right now. You just unlocked me from this prison I've been suffering in. Omgosh.... I have been trapped in hell addicted to a narcissist. Every single point you made she had. You have saved my life.... Thank you thank you thank you for helping me let go

I was married to a covert narcissist for 21 years, divorce for 2 years and couldn't, for the life of me, understand why I could not let her go! She treated me horribly! Then a very close friend of mine suggested that perhaps I would benefit from watching a video. WOW! Someone actually put into words, the way I felt! It all came crashing down on me like a ton of bricks! Dr., this video describes my relationship with her about 98%! Thank you very much for sharing this with me! -D

"Negative emotions, are never negative! " ❤ It!!

I’m beginning to understand that self love will not attract a narcissist because self love puts up boundaries you won’t cross for them because you love yourself. They can’t be in that situation because they need every fiber of your being to be on them.

Is this anyone else's favourite past time? Watching these vids? I love it better than netflix lol

My narcissist husband calls me a snowflake because I cry over everything. Learning about narcissists, I understand its not me now.

My wife has all of this. We went to a therapist to decide whether she could help us have a better relationship. When the therapist asked my wife "So what have you done wrong in this relationship?" My wife went red in the face and did not reply. After the interview my wife said she would not work with that therapist. Nowadays she prefers to have secret sex with women and blame me for why we are not having sex, amongst other things. Yes it can really be this bad with a narcissist.

Everything your saying is true. I was with a narcissist for 5 years. I had low self esteem. I thought I was in love because like you said at the beginning of our relationship he was overly lovable. Then after a while he started mentally & emotionally abusing me. He did what ever he wanted & I was not allowed to. He did almost everything to be & I thought that if I leave him I wouldn’t have any friends because he was so nice to other people. Even when I told my best friend she couldn’t believe it. I finally fell out of love with him & had had it & I just walked away. I hope people notice this because it’s just a waste of time. 5 years wasted. There’s a lot more to it. Every kind of abuse with this person. Hope this helps someone.

Trauma bond is the worst addiction I've felt. And I think it's worse for anyone has addictive behaviour

The moment I started listening to professionals, I have just realized that I married a Covert Narcissists and everything Dr has explained is what I'v been going through for Five years now. Everything that has been said is what I go through in my Day to Day life and It's life draining

Thank you! I’ve been involved in a 26 year marriage with a narcissist who is 64?and I’m 54. For the past year he won’t come home and keeps lying to me as why he don’t come home. This video has empowered me to seek to move on!

This is exactly why I will never have sex before marriage again! Had my heart ripped out. If I had gotten to know him, before being so intimate, I would have saved myself a world of pain. Sex creates powerful bonds that are not easy to break. Perfect for keeping a health marriage together during difficult times, but an absolute disaster when it bonds you to someone who doesn’t love.

A good mental twist that I´ve learned is to understand that you percieve intimacy with a narcissist, you don´t recieve intimacy. There´s a difference between those two.

BRAVO !!👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 This is the most explicative and comprehensive video about a narcissistic relationship. First timer with a narcissist, never ever experienced anything like that, I’m in shock, aware of the trauma and yet suffering for the detachment. You described word by word what I went through for three years. Please explain me how to heal now that I found the strength to leave 🙏🏻🙌🏻 Thank you for sharing your guidance to us.

Everything you say resonates. Went through all 12 signs for 5 long years...finally broke free. Yes it's an addiction. Never again will I put myself through it. Thank you for sharing.

People, I had to learn the hard way learn from my mistakes. This video is so comprehensive, take notes. At age 48, I was “love bombed”, “Idealized”, “future faked” (Sure, we built our dream, $1 million dollar home, but 70% was my money), Buy me the $10,000 engagement ring, had a sweet wedding, had family gatherings. Two weeks after the Honey moon, he verbally abuse me in a grocery parking lot and demanded the wedding ring back. That was the beginning of “sorrows”. After that he continually devalued with me for seven years. Then I found all these videos on narcissism, and I was able to put the pieces of the puzzle together. When I stopped the validation, and set boundaries to stop the verbal abuse, he decided he needed a Wife that was more agreeable, less “militant”. He started looking at KZfaq videos and found that women in the Philippines are “easily dominated”. So he bought an airline ticket for his birthday and is heading to the Philippines tomorrow. He wants me to drive him to the airport, to search for his new wife there. I know for sure he has three connections there already. Yes…it’s heartbreaking, but I know God is taking him out of my life for a reason. I have let go. I’m anxious but grateful for him to be gone now. I’m in the process of filing for divorce of course. But it’s still incredibly painful. Heed the warning signs, I never knew about this disorder, and it almost destroyed me. “But there go I, but by the grace of God”. I am 61 now & can’t run fast enough.

Feeling really sick while listening to this, its over but looking back I was blind.

Everything you say is spot on!! This is exactly my experience with unfortunately many narcissists in my life. I kept thinking there was something wrong with me. Thank you so much for your videos!! God Bless you!!

This is a really good video on so many levels - im going to save this in my downloads. Thank You

Most important line in this entire video: Narcissists never change. And if you can get a narcissist into therapy, the therapist will usually tell the narcissist, "sorry, I can't help you." If that doesn't say it all, then nothing else ever could.

Empaths seem to attract narcissist. We have to learn to not just care about others but ourselves. Freedom comes when we respect and love ourselves.

A very healthy breakdown of the attitude and perspective of the narc, as well as the likely emotional tells when in a situation with one. Thank you.

You are a hero to me to enlighten me in this way. Being rescued is an experience where someone actually cares about your pain and it is not something you can give yourself. Caring is a gift that you can not initially give yourself. It is the ultimate vulnerability that we have to have someone else care first. We have to have someone else give us our value before we can work to grow that feeling in ourselves by further good exchanges throughout a lifetime.

Devalued, ghosted and ignored= right on point. This is the most hurtful ❤

My experience is that we all allow these people within our lives, so take responsibility. Set boundaries, with all of relationships.

Very helpful video. I will be watching one of my family members closely now. You are a beautiful woman Dr. Spelman. Keep sharing!

I have "craved" people I did not like and had no interest or even intent in. This must be that "addiction" stuff. Thank you for validating me in this place where I was blaming my self and my own needs instead of blaming their sick needs.

I was with a narcissist for 36 years and married for 33 of them. I’m much much better now than I was before. There were good times of course, especially since I stayed so long, but the bad ones were heartbreaking and lonely. If you meet a narcissist or with one now, run don’t walk and get away while you still can!!!!!!

My ex would say that! "I know you better than you know yourself ". Who says that? Who thinks like that? How horrible and controlling.

This is the best explanation on the subject that I have ever heard. Thank you so much! Very valuable information. 👌

Understanding helps, a lot. It feels like finally one is able to make sense of all those things you couldn't really articulate. And you explained things in a way that I didn't hear before and the penny dropped a few times. Thanks for this great explanation.

When she said a good therapist will tell the narcissist I can't help you is when it really hit home

I was married to a narcissist for 13 years and it was hell!! To the point where I wanted to kill myself luckily he went to prison for 10 yrs and I was freed. He got released 3 years ago and tried to use the kids to get me to go back to him but he no longer had control over me and I am so happy alone I’ve gotten to know me and work on myself. Never again!!!!

I have listened at least 50-60 videos by diff therapists.. this is the most comprehensive one with exact words and easy to recognise patterns all compiled at one place. M really thankful to the creator.

I believe this is one of the best explanations of ‘dealing with a narcissist’ I’ve heard. It clearly helps with understanding wether someone is dealing with a narcissist….😮

Great video. When you realize you’re an accoutrement, maybe a trophy or prize, you realize there is no “relationship” and they can’t help you realize your dreams and potential.

The ones they let go are the ones they know they can’t control anymore! How wonderfully said by the Dr. It is the truest statement and the first person I’ve heard say it! Thank you Dr.

This really put things into perspective…thank you!

Only a few minutes in and already think this is a fantastic analysis with some really good real world examples. Nice work.

I once expressed to my ex that I wasn't feeling good enough for her. I tried to be open about how I was feeling. She burst into tears and proceeded to change the topic to about how she was feeling. Saying things like "that means I'm not doing good enough for you. I'm not doing a good enough job" At first I thought I struck a nerve and tried to comfort her and assure that she was. Felt incredibly guilty for masking her cry. But I didn't realise what was happening. We went to sleep after. And I never even had my feelings acknowledged. This nearly happend every time I tried to express how I was feeling. About anything. They copy what you are saying and feeling in order to completely distract from the topic in the first place. I was to kind and to thoughtful. My biggest warning is, do not fall for the tears. They are incredible actors. When it came to sex I rarely felt any connection. And was most of the time uncomfortable. Towards the end of our relationship I couldn't even be in the same bed as her and had to sleep in other bedrooms of the house. I am Still recovering from an ugly relationship after 7 months. Don't beat yourself up on the things you should of said or could of said. There are no right or wrong when it comes to somthing like this. A healthy couple should be able to rationalise and consult with one another with a great amount of trust. Find someone you can do that with. Love you. Sending peace fellow soldier.

I've had narcissist apologize but I could feel it wasn't genuine and the same behavior would be repeated again as if it was never discussed in the first place and It was almost like I had to beg for an apology. Just another draining technique used by them..

If you want to know if he’s a narcissist just say no to something he asks you to do. If he gets angry or very disturbed by your no response he may be a narcissist. Also put up any kind of boundary like I don’t want to be talked to like that or something like I can’t see you on certain days of the week because I need to have some time to myself. Narcissists don’t care for that. I personally haven’t ever felt like the N was looking down on me or making me feel uncomfortable on the first date. They were always charming and attentive in the beginning.

Minute 18!! Whenever they find that they cant control me, they slither away. And every time I thank God for giving me discernment and the courage to hold my boundaries.

How about they want you to satisfy them and they don't care if you're satisfied or not is that one of the signs