Cigarette...

Shut up you stupid [cigarette]! (Joking, obviously.)

Hijacking top comment Censored because of KZfaq's rules, KZfaq doesn't have the time to go through every video so it doesn't allow certain words

​@@DocFunkenstein Its OK to say 'Mncng P__ftah' ' though because the censors have very little, very narrow band, intellect. But they DO do *devious* Quite a number of essentially innocuous YT vids now have Age warnings (an Agonoize song - in German - FFS!) To watch them you have to provide Google with core biographic data to 'prove your age' The fact you have used Googlemail and other Google facilities for two decades damn near is not taken as proof. The Information Ombudsman states such behaviour is fine - Despite it conradciting their own protocol of what is proper!

@@babboon5764 That's because of laws, not yt

"Anymore"? Not reading the description has been a thing pretty much from the start, really.

+

Who can blame them? Most descriptions are drier than Antarctica...

I generally don't read descriptions from corporate channels, since they're usually not that personal. I'm glad you pointed it out, though. I was wondering if they had just done it in response to comments on a recent video where the word wasn't censored.

imagine YT being such an americanised pain in the arse that you cant use slang from other countries cos the poor stupid seppos get butthurt about it....... fucking hell.... next up: spanish YT wont be able to talk about anything black

sorry the bleep machine was broken

We are bleeping the word fag, meaning cigarette, having nothing to do with the american usage of the word, now? Im all for not offending people but bleeping words that arent offensive because some people dont understand context is moronic and I thought QI wouldnt bow to such nonsense. You guys dont need to be monetized that badly. That said, the overdub was funny.

@@bipolarminddroppings Read the description

@@bipolarminddroppings it's just cos youtube picks up certain words, and it would see that word has a slur and demonetise the video. That's why, not for censorship.

Right, and it's not like this video is guaranteed to be demonetized for including that word, but the KZfaq algorithm is fickle and mysterious and all that, so channels like this want to play it safe. You're right that it's stupid, but Damian is also right that it's hilarious, so who really cares?

I doubt Sessions would have appreciated being posthumously censored. You should have just used the blue whale cartoon again.

I'm going to be honest. I didn't notice it until I scrolled down after the video.

Apology tour. Welcome to the woke minority. Stephen would simply love you right now

I found that _c i g a r e t t e_ out of nowhere pretty funny.

@@frosty_brandon Same!

Yup, whether she likes it or not she is something of a National Treasure : )

“Bog off” not bug. She is hilarious though, good on the show “The Taskmaster” aswell, worth a watch.

The babies have the smell too. Momma just don't want to get eaten.

@@neutronpixie6106 well to be fair she has a better chance than the babies

🤣🤣🤣

Guess one tried to eat the other out of the house.

I didn’t realize that was a substitution until I read the other comments. It matched with his voice surprisingly well.

@@stevevasta What? No, it didn't lol

Just to clarify, varnish fumes can cause premature brain damaged babies. So best for expectant mothers to avoid.

"Viewers at home are advised not to breathe in nail varnish fumes. Especially when pregnant."

T Electronix to clarify, she meant wood varnish, not nail varnish.... although I am not sure whether that is any less detrimental?!

@@K1lostream Wood varnish can still have harmful fumes.

Okay! I hope it's clear I wasn't advocating it, it was just something someone once told me!

Naughty, naughty...

That would have brought the house down

I was expecting the panel to pick up on that punchline actually. It was right there but they let it slide.

@@puirYorick Jimmy Carr would have said it haha

I’m guessing it has something to do with the person having passing knowledge of the composition of chalk or coal. Without prior knowledge, even passive, you wouldn’t know what coal is. Though if a person who had never known the composition of coal suddenly craved it, it would be.... quite interesting.

There is a certain amount of pre-programmed knowledge in people. Tiny babies like sweet things and dislike bitter, because there is instinctive knowledge that toxins tend to be bitter and carbs sweet, and that carbs are nutritious and toxins are Bad. This combined with the fact that even if a person has never eaten chalk, they've probably smelt it, so some awareness of composition has been acquired. So, the body knows that it needs calcium and that chalky smell = calcium by instinct, and the brain knows that chalk smells chalky by exposure -> you want to eat chalk.

@@msai257 Yeah, that all sounds plausible. But it still seems remarkable because such knowledge seems "high level" - more abstract. Like, with "sweet / bitter", the tongue has different receptors for these, and so one can imagine a basic instinct, along the lines of "if these sweet receptors trigger, that's good. If these bitter receptors trigger, that's bad". But, in this case, the pre-programmed knowledge would seem to need to be quite "high level" - with abstract concepts, like materials, composition, the notion of what coal or chalk is, and relating the visual of seeing a lump of coal to that abstract concept of coal. And none of this involves words. Babies aren't born knowing their mother tongue and have to learn it. So we're using the word "coal" here - but that word is different in other languages. If there was a pre-programmed "coal is good for carbon" in our brains, how does that eventually get associated with the actual object in real life. And, of course, we live in a modern world where miners dig coal and companies make packs of chalk for writing on blackboards. These things are easily available to us now, but that wouldn't have been the case back in "caveman days", when presumably such an instinct would have evolved. So, you know, you can understand my confusion about how on Earth this could ever be possible. It's definitely true and real, we know, but what's the mechanism? Though I do like your hypothesis about it being about smelling it. That by-passes the problems I've just mentioned. Our sense of smell is particulate. If you're smelling coal or chalk, then it's because actual tiny particles of these things have entered our noses. Thus, we now have something that's like the "sweet / bitter" receptors on the tongue. But this opens up another intriguing ideas. That all of us are, in fact, analysing the composition of things that we smell. But this is purely subconscious. Because, i don't know about you, but when I smell a flower, I'm not consciously thinking "hmm, 20% sodium. 3% potassium. Trace amounts of water" or anything like that. But this idea would suggest that, on a subconscious level, there might actually be a part of the brain that's really doing that. I do think, though, that the subconscious mind is way more powerful than most of us realise. I've got this thing where if I need to be up for, say, 6am then I'll wake up and turn to look at the clock and it reads 5:58. And, if I've also had it that when I don't need to wake up for a specific time, then I'll start naturally waking up at dawn. I'll wake up and look out the window, and see dawn breaking - and this happens at all times of the year, even though when dawn happens varies substantially at my latitude in the UK. So, I do believe that we humans possess an internal clock that's spookily accurate. But it's just that we're usually ignoring it (and forcing ourselves up by 7:30am, rather than just naturally rising with the dawn - but, as I say, when I'm not waking up by a specific time, then I naturally drift back into this "wake up at dawn" cycle automatically). There's more going on subconsciously than we give give credit for, I feel. But because it's not conscious - and perhaps not easily provable - we overlook it. For example, I like your sense of smell idea, but how would one actually scientifically prove that's true? It sounds good. But how could you demonstrate that it's real?

Also keep in mind the olfactory element of taste. If you've smelled it, you might have a guess of how it tastes.

Nature is mysterious. There's a video of Elephants in Africa going to a specific cave and digging out dirt and rocks and eating them. It turns out this dirt is very rich in salt and minerals which they don't get in their normal herbivore diet. How they figured out what their body needed and how to get it is a mystery. The video is called "why elephants go deep underground." What's notable is that all the elephants they filmed going into the cave were females, some of them pregnant

Her instincts at the time; AQUIRE SODIUM

I crave pickle brine whenever I'm hungover. Actually peanut butter too, quite often. So for me this sounds like on the normal end of the pregnancy craving scale.

During pregnancy, women do crave sour food

@@bigmeknurgle I’m gonna bust out an old meme with “They crave that mineral”

I've told more than one teenager that I really wish their mom had swallowed. The look on their faces when they finally work out what I mean is utterly priceless.

Squirrels do that

KZfaq has some really ridiculous policies.

Yeah but they'd probably bet demonitized anyway if they left it in

we must bow down to american sensibilities i'm afraid

Unless John Sessions really was miming holding a (admittedly tiny) gay man between his fingers? 😁

@@telectronix1368 And if so, what was he doing to it? 😁

Really fucking irritating, isn't it? (There's another commonly used British word for you YT - come at me!)

And female kangaroos have three vaginas.

dad was probably a ginger and one or both carried the gene for white spotting and color dilution. grey is genetically black with a modifier, and white spotting is a rather common gene. i'd also guess that the ginger was probably a boy, as a black molly would be unable to produce any ginger girls, regardless of dad's colors, just tortoiseshells with a ginger mate. regardless its pretty normal for cats to have quite colorful litters! their genetics are quite fun to work out lol

@@jacksonpurcell8625 it's going to be hard to tell the three neighbourhood male cats they all could be daddies.... pay up the child support pricks!

@@BaMenace it could in fact be all 3 at once! cats are able to have one litter with multiple different fathers, which is certainly an interesting adaptation!

Those people generally ignore the fact that she has a wide repertoire and the "husband" jokes almost always are absolutely valid in the context of the show - very much like here. It's really just a mixture of confirmation bias and straight up misogyny that keeps the lie alive.

Really? I think she's probably the best female regular. Always makes me laugh with her joke delivery style.

I was delighted to see him again. Haven't seen this clip before.

lol this dude thinks western woman breastfeed in 2021, everyone laugh at him

@@glemmstengal This guy doesn't know what the word "if" means. Everyone laugh at him.

And lo and behold, it was a "I'm fat"-joke.

@@printeh Often they are and those don't work. But not that time. That worked because it flipped perception / expectation. At most the fact the the lass has 'obviously and decisively beaten anorexia; at most added a kind of boost to the gag.

I think cole is basically like cabbage (der Kohl in German, la col in Spanish). Isn't it ?

coal

@@matthewetmoi8436 The dictionary said it's a term for the genus _Brassica._ So it includes a number of cruciferous vegetables, like broccoli, cauliflower, cabbage, choy sum, rutabaga, turnips, and mustard. I imagine in practice, people use it for just a few of those, like maybe broccoli, cauliflower, and cabbage. But I don't know. She also says "no one eats cole anymore, do they?" So I'm wondering if she's talking about something more specific that isn't common anymore, or if it was just cabbage or whatever and people don't call it that anymore, so she thinks it's something else. Maybe where she grew up, "cole" was something more specific that isn't popular anymore.

@@telectronix1368 The quote is "they say you only want to eat * if you're lacking vitamins, don't they?" I don't think vitamin deficiency drives people to eat coal.

@@EebstertheGreat I couldn't say. The desire to eat coal (I've heard of eating chalk, too) is ascribed to a dietary defficency though.

Hmm.

Me too! It was good to see him again :)

** KLAXON **

Why would QI do that? They're not a public health body.

DENVER BRONCOS.

It's more that they're trying to avoid KZfaq's automatic system which will punish the YT account for any slurs it detects (even if it isn't a slur in this context).

Yes, but the reason the English call it that is because the full f word can mean a bundle of sticks that are used for kindling. And the reason that it's slang for a gay person is because when they executed people for being gay, they burned them alive and they didn't get tied to a stake like Joan of Arc, they were just thrown on the fire which was considered much more disrespectful. So that's why gay people are referred to as the full f word and then shortened to the 3 letter one. There's no avoiding that it is an ugly word that should be phased out. No one uses the word for the kindling reason anymore and it's only used to insult someone or slang for a cigarette in the U.K.

Wait until the censors hear about Golden Gaytime...

Classic Americans acting like they're the only country in the world

@UwU 😲

"Twins" means two individuals that are born from the same pregnancy. That twins can develop from the same egg ("identical twins") or from separate eggs ("fraternal twins" / "non-identical twins") is why we have the two terms. I would guess that, with newer medical technology, the separate eggs of fraternal twins don't even need to come from the same mother, let alone where the sperm came from.

And it doesn't make sense, either. He isn't implying he would have been using a gay man with that gesture: he was miming a cigarette.

read the description of the video. its just for youtube demonetisation..

It is only for Americans. They are the ones who demonitise ridiculous nonsense like this. I can assure it has nothing to do with Europeans, at least!

​@@halsti99 Yeah, and what nationaility are the poeple who put in place such a puritanical, ridiculous rule?

@@Nilguiri Don't get too defensive of Europe, as that continent has had its fair share of tyrannical leadership and media crackdown as well. 😆

I bloody loved John Sessions, that would be great :)

Although, as in this case, his "knowledge" is often nonsense.

I've never noticed these. I even rewatched this video to see if I simply hadn't noticed them, but saw nothing. Perhaps the problem is either on your end or between you and KZfaq.

do we get a certificate?

@@TheQIElves Yes but the text will be censored. To avoid scaring the horses.

​@@TheQIElves Only just read the description, my apologies. The award is still up for grabs though - algorithms are bloody daft.