Exactly!

+melissapoo7 hi, when u say you give yourself boundaries , what do u mean by that what kind of boundaries do u set in a relationship? And how do u bring it up?

+melissapoo7 thank u so much so what I gathered from that was to date for marriage and a Christian guy but the issue still is how do I bring it up and I'm finding it really hard to set boundaries for myself like in terms of physical touch and things that we do together and I'm just wondering if u have any kind of starter boundaries that I can build off from

+melissapoo7 thank u so much and may God continue to bless u that means so much and I'm definitely going to take your suggestions on board 😜😜😜😜

+Jonathan Garcia I guess I'm what you'd consider to be popular (mainly because of how I treat people) but I am also a devoted Christian and a pastors kid. Sex is a huge thing, a wonderful gift that God has given us but it's being blown up in the wrong ways. Be careful on how you act because people on the outside will take note. This guy said that in not like the others in anyway because I seem to have integrity and I act as an independent women, not letting guys sway me into stuff that I don't want. Now he's taken his walk with Christ much more seriously. To you all don't back out of the fight!

Agreed.

Amen

Very well said!

Code word for "I can't get any"

Amen!

Im exactly the same! I'm a 17 year old who's a pastors daughter, I'm constantly reminded by friends around me how they're all having boyfriends/girlfriends and having sex and all sorts and as a Christian they don't understand my decision to choose to wait until marriage. I wish my friends could see that it's not just me doing this and that there are many like me choosing to follow God and the plans he has for me. I've never had a boyfriend either so I can totally understand the idea of not settling, I've only properly 'kissed' a boy as in more than a quick peck once last summer and even that I do not feel meant anything to me as it was at a party. I don't drink either and I understand how you're feeling as I wish someone would respect me and love me for who I am, faith and my morals also. I just wanted to say you're not alone in this and your comment has really touched me as I'm in the same boat! Stay strong as you will be glad of it later on! and God bless!💜

So cool :)

abi lauren Thats so awesome! Sometimes i get a little discouraged because i feel like I'm the only one left. Its so comforting knowing that I'm not! Thanks for the reply and the sweet words!

***** thanks so much!

***** Thank you so much! I was worried my comment was going to get a lot of hate, but i've gotten the exact opposite and it means the world! God bless

+Ian Elliott-Carter Hi Ian. Towards the end of this video I link/annotate another video of mine. It's all about the beautiful grace and redemption and healing we have in Jesus. My favorite thing about Jesus is He can turn our mess into a message. When we step into His grace, no shame, only redemption. No more joy than that. Blessings!

***** amen! loving the "Its not what you think" series by the way! God bless.

curious why you regret it, is it your conscious or is there something more?

+Jefferson Bethke Friendly FYI, I see no annotation or link to that video, which is amazing, by the way

+Jefferson Bethke I too didn't see a link or annotation to your other video ):

+ANON1912 praying for you

You're not the only one. I know it'll get better someday but sometimes I just feel lost with my self

I will be praying that Jesus will restore your joy in life and that He will show you how truly loved and important you are! God bless and I truly hope you have a good week!!! =]

He will guide you. just focus on Him and His word. God Bless!!!

Hey dude, one thing I've learnt in life is that it's always either your body, soul or mind that's outta wack. If you have a strong relationship with Jesus and your still feeling down, maybe your physically unhealthy. Start going to the gym, going on walks once a day (30 min -1 hour , walks also help clear your mind) also make sure your eating healthy eggs, chicken breast, ground beef, smoothies etc. Lastly is your mind, have you been passionate about anything lately ? Passionate about learning about history ? Maybe the stock market ? Programming ? Ultimately I have found that if you take care of your spirit following Jesus, your body being healthy and your mind reading that which Intrest you, you'll end up in a better state, also consider helping the poor, going to your church and helping feed the poor. If you feel bad you can spend time helping someone feel better it will give you perspective and the strength to view your problems In a smaller light.

Since when Dracula is a Nothing?

Not really lol

Look like you've never been to India. Come here and you will find 40 year old virgins.

+Chelsea Crockett dang thanks so much Chelsea! You rock and we all love your channel! Keep killing it!

+Jefferson Bethke +Chelsea Crockett yay Christian KZfaqrs! Appreciate you both

Two favorite youtubers put together :)

+Alex Nelson it's a sin just like every other sin end of story

+Luis M And what makes homosexuality it a sin? Your point kinda just sounds like "it's wrong because it's wrong".

+Josh Higham Josh, you are absolutely right! If the Old Testament alone teaches us one thing, it's that God alone is sovereign over all and that glory and honor given to Him is what matters most...not what brings you or me joy and satisfaction. Countless people, even cities were destroyed for choosing what brought mankind joy. Jefferson's teachings here simply cannot be substantiated by the Bible...can they Jefferson???

+Josh Higham I personally think that joy and God's glory are one and the same thing, as in directly related. Joy is part of the fruit of the spirit, and as such is bringing God glory. Joy without God's glory doesn't even exist, so if we searching for Joy in our relationship, we will search for God's glory, and vice versa.

Great comment Josh.

great !

are they mutually exclusive?

+StellasCinema There is a really great KZfaq Channel called the Bible Project and it gives an overview of the books of the bible in really cool animated clips. Of course I encourage you to read the scripture yourself but I think it might be a great way to to get a head start into understanding christianity and the character of God

+Larken Caniglia okay thanks! much appreciated :)

Talk to God tell him exactly how you feel be honest with him he Loves it when we are honest and read his word so when things like this comes you'll know how to respond and pray, pray prayer and reading is the key God bless!!!:)

I have the exact same problem

I also have had this problem lately- probably for the last year. It's incredibly frustrating to deal with, especially if you're curious and look into all the christian vs. athiest arguments and see some good point on athiest side. A friend was once explaining that he had the same questioning and curious character- but God calls us to be like children even in matters like this. Childreb don't look so deep into things and could care less. Of course, he calls us to be mature in spirit but like children in other aspects.

Roy Robert B Or she could just find a guy herself and ask for her fathers blessing

Roy Robert B​ I would rather not have my father look for a mate, I'm just gonna look for a guy and seek his approval. He doesn't look over small things, if he's the wrong one, he'll know.

Roy Robert B first off im pagan. I want to find a man I love, some one I would want to be with the rest of my life, and seek my fathers approval.

will you marry me

Hey looks like you found someone and have a kid. How exciting!

I would assume the answer being a "no" from him. Many who live together are having sex & even if by some chance they aren't, the temptation would be mighty strong to.

I would love to hear jeff's opinion, my personal opinion would be what's the point? If you are already doing everything a marriage does why would you not get married? (Unless is because of principles like not believing in the system or something like that)

+Mariana Aguilar Well some times the situation doesn't allow it. When my sister got married my parents, who believed you shouldn't live together before marriage, they didn't allow her and her fiancé at the time to live in the apartment they bought together for the week before their wedding. Later on when my father was about to get remarried my sisters and I joked about how he was going to move in with this women prior to their wedding (they had it planned for about a year later) and because of this seemingly harmless joke they decided to move up the date exponentially. The ended up getting a divorce less than a year later. While in both instances they were planning to get married this strict believe of not living together before hand caused a lot of issues. For a long time my sister held some ill feelings towards my parents because her husband had to stay in their apartment alone and my father rushed into a marriage that could have been avoided if they had lived together beforehand.

I did for a few months because I was homeless-ish and would never again, mainly because I hate living with people.

I think if the person is not your husband/wife, why would you give them the privileges that you would give your spouse?

I question my faith all the time.

Thanks so much! Chelsea rocks and glad to have you come join over on my channel! Hope my videos are an encouragement to ya.

Anna Willemstein h

Andrea Pyne men too........

true

+LionRoseMusic awesome

+LionRoseMusic foh

+Christopher Scott Aw you must cry every day knowing that gay people have sex too :-)

Sex, living together, and beds are for married couples

+Jefferson Bethke Thanks for the clear thinking on this issue Jeff.

+Jefferson Bethke 9/11

+Jefferson Bethke Firstly, this is the most non-judgmental video about sex before marraige I've ever watched; No shade throwing and condemning words spoken. I was wondering though, if you have sex with someone you're not legally married too, are you married too them before God? if sex is consumating a marraige, does that mean if you are married? sex in marriage can go so wrong at times , people leave or ruin the covernant. I get what you're saying and actually agree with you but I think I've seen this discussion on sex lack so much grace for so many years, its made me question from solid "No sex before marraige" to think "well, it lacks grace anyways and is one way be condemned so whatever, do what you want- you'll be judged anyways". Seems like its the saints and sinner when it comes to sex. (btw, I'm just asking a question, please don't be ungracious people)

+Jefferson Bethke I agree fully Jeff. It's not easy though, the older you get, the worse (or more difficult) it is, the inability to connect becomes an issue, feeling singled out etc, shyness starts taking over, and suddenly you find yourself unable to communicate clearly due to fear of being judged for waiting and let's not talk about dating, because it's not an easy discussion topic either, people ask, "How do you do it" or "What's wrong with you?" etc, then you see it's harder to speak to people who haven't waited (even though I don't judge) because they feel judged, so when do you bring up the subject, do you bring it up, it always feels just a little too soon to discuss? But at the end of the day, I'll stand firm in God's promise that there is righteousness, peace and joy and that one true connection in waiting, I'll stand there with a ring in my hand and only I'll understand what it took to keep this one gift for my wife someday, and she'll know that no matter what, she'll have my all. It will be worth it, no regrets.

+Jefferson Bethke ive known a lot of young christians who have gotten engaged and then started having sex before actually being married. i wonder your thoughts on that. thanks!

+Linette Sanchez I agree with what you say, I"ve always thought that it certainly was something for 2 people that love eachother, and that it should be purely out of love and not lust, and then I mean the kind of love he describes.

***** No, with marriage you dont either, because there is a reason divorces are as high as ever right now. Divorce makes it harder to split, but if the reason you stay together is because it is `a hassle` you are already staying for the wrong reasons. I think a solid relationship is as strong as marriage honestly.

I was living with my boyfriend and we both feel better after we got married. no guilt after sex and no need to feel ashame when praying to God.

ladama Would you ever feel that need tho if you both know you will stay together even without marriage? I dont see why you would be. As I said, I dont see the significance anymore in marriage after seeing so many of parents and friends and what not just get divorced. I'd say a solid and truthfull relationship is better then the most lasting marriages because they are staying due to "the hassle" of getting out.

I won't call myself devout (though I try to connect with and follow God) but, despite wavering faith, I think I do reasonably well resisting temptations. As a young man in college there's much sexual temptation. I decided, when I first really understood what sex was (about 14), that I'd only have sex with a consenting woman I loved. I didn't limit myself to marriage but I determined if The relationship wasn't committed I'd abstain. I have been made fun of by my peers for disapproving of casual sex but if that's the toughest peer pressure I need to encounter I've probably been lucky.

I'm Christian too and I agree with you on some things .. Basically people who aren't ready for sex shouldn't have sex at all because sex is a big commitment and if you're being childish and just want to have sex , that can also lead to pressured marriages . Some couples want to get married JUST for sex (my parents - dated for 5 months , got married right away & not the only ones) and I don't think that's the right thing to do just because they feel that's what they need to do in order to have "safe" sex (inside marriage) & to just have sex and then right away go into the "it's over" page is really childish and stupid.. Meaning you weren't ready for it AT ALL (emotionally , physically & mentally) . If you're not sure if you want to or ready to have sex , don't do it . If you feel like you have trust, care and love for someone to be on the "Sex Level" then that's your decision .. Although , I'm not saying it's the right thing to do , don't be stupid about it . Diseases can happen at ANY time , in or out of marriage .

+Middle-East -Christians Amen. Jesus' grace is enough.

+Middle-East -Christians PS. there are many more of us than you think. Many of us are not happy with the perversion and abuse here. So many broken hearts and families...

I don't believe in any ideals founded in fear. God says don't so you shouldn't (fear; afraid of judgement) most people not married aren't ready and they have a bad experience (A. pure speculation B. assuming you are right (afraid of bad experience) Eg. I never learned how to do a backflip because i was worried id break my neck. Never hot in the NFL was worried id get hurt. Never freed my soul from bondage because i might be judged eternally. Feeble guys srry. I got mad respect for religion but I hate to say that your beliefs are not founded in reason. Reason and rationality eliminate the need for a god that has trivial rules. Reason leads to morality and only reason. I do not hurt people BECAUSE I was them to be happy and healthy like I want for myself. Reason.

Agreed I as a virgin man don't want to marry such girls who will infect me with their diseases and filth.They aren't wife material.I only want a virgin girl

+Grace Sex is normal, natrual and has nothing to do with christianity.

maybe you should have married sooner to avoid falling into sin...just sayin

+Priscilla Nieto Omg what has happend to this world, i mean really sex is the most natrual thing in the world. I totally respect christian people but the sex aspect of it is down right stupid and ignorant. If you love eachother go for it, as long as you're not hurting anyone and there is consent, everything is okay in my opinion

+Hi Cow sex in itself is not wrong. Sex is a wonderful and beautiful thing. God has, however, commanded all of us to wait to have sex until marriage. Christians don't and shouldn't ever push that sex in general is wrong. it's the context in which it is done that is the deciding factor on wheather or not it's wrong.

Priscilla Nieto If you beleive in god and that is hes wish upon christians its totally fine, i dont agree with you because were i grew up sex was about love and not relegion. That dosen't mean i dont respect your opinion and you should feel free to do whatever you want.

+Hi Cow Your idea of 'religion' is very different from a Christians. We do not separate love from God because he IS love.

I think that maybe if you haven't found what your looking for , then u need to seriously pray because if you want a husband that has that spiritual and biblical knowledge then u need to work for it you need to take time out maybe every day or every week praying continuously for him and maybe writing down what you want them saying God give me what you want according to your plan, and the patience to wait for your husband . Also our God is a God of specifics you gotta be specific because God listens to prayer and if your not specific then you'll end up with someone you didn't want. Ask God for what you want and ask God to give you the husband that God wants to you and ask God to give you a sign that his is him and I'm sure you'll be fully satisfied by what u find .

+Katie Downs You should check out Kati Morton's videos :)

I do videos that talk about what prevents and cures psychiatric illnesses.

taylor etoria Your value comes from God, not from other people. You mean more to him then you could ever imagine and nothing you could do could make him love you less. Please never forget that!!

So your attracted to men ?? And your saying the way you've gotten over that is to stop having sex??

You have to pray to God and make him cleanse you and change your feelings towards men. (I'm guessing you're a guy cos of your profile pic) Not having sex doesn't change the fact that you still are attracted to men, I pray that God will make you whole again and cleanse you. In Jesus Name Amen.

I have this question on my mind that I've been wondering about this topic...im not trying to insult anyone i really do wonder about this.. does it really count as sex if people use parts of their body other than the male and female organs together? I mean male organ with the anus and the female organs together to me doesn't really have other purpose other than arousal. Right? When people use other parts of the body wouldn't people say they had foreplay and not really say they had sex? I dunno... anyway... i think everyone deserves to experience love and get married no matter who they're attracted to (except for attraction to animals or objects of course) if they want it, but i think there's a reason why homosexuals don't reproduce.. anyway, you should check out youtube vids of people who got over being attracted to the same gender if you're interested of course.. if you feel celebacy is ideal for you and you can still be happy then good..not everyone gets to be married or wants to be married even straight people..if not don't feel down because God really wants the best for you and your life..dont depend on only finding love from people because there is no greater love than God's love for you..

+Hannah Faye I wouldn't necessarily say it counts as sex because it's not actual intercourse with that individual, however the 'foreplay' does lead to other things such as sexual frustration if u don't have sex and it just makes the temptation a whole lot harder so the best thing to do is to avoid trying to stimulate each other sexually without having sex because it makes the 'waiting for marriage' part a whole lot harder than it already is. It's better to try as a couple to stimulate each other's brains and do other things together that take your mind off sex.

👏🏿👏🏿 super hard decision but with time it becomes natural. Remember obedience is better than sacrifice, so I respect that you are trying to obey God before anything else. One person was saying that you need to pray to be delivered from this, true. But what's more important is your obedience. Also for you to just stop being attracted to men would truly take divine intervention. It's in you're hardware. Good luck

Amen!

Mary R. Actually, the word "fornicator" in the Bible is a translation of the word from the original Greek text, "porneia", which means "prostitution." Not premarital sex. And the word "fornicator" used to mean "prostitute.

God also said Do not wear clothing woven of two kinds of material. Leviticus 19:19 But I'll bet you let that one slide

+tanniarbls1 I appreciate your concern for where Jefferson's teachings are stated in the Bible. I also noticed that he did not include Bible references in this video. In short, I can say rather assuredly that his ideas on this topic are not explained, even in a remote sense, in the Bible. In Jefferson's defense, I have also asked him to clarify his teaching by the Bible, so I guess we'll see!

lauren d This comment needs more likes lol!

+Mystic Mayhem marrige does not determin love. if you love someone why wait sex is all about love and affection if you're with the right person.

I pray he heals and restores you. Thank God for mercy. The simple fact that you WANT this, God will honor it.

Hi Cow Because love is more than sex and sex used efficiently is an extention of that love. Theres a lot of people who just have sex because its fun it makes them feel wanted but that's not healthy without that security, that sacrifice your spouse gives for you or that wholesomeness that you find once you finally are truly commited for good in a healthy true marriage. People have distorted view of marriage i think thats why so many marriages fail especially in the U.S

Is it wrong for an unmarried woman to be in just underwear or a bikini kissing on a guy?

absolutely see what you're saying and you're not alone. respect for voicing what you feel. I don't know if we will ever ultimately know man.

+JADiaz10 I've asked myself this question too. And the conclusion that i've found is not to think of 'marriage' as just the ceremony or the piece of paper but everything which comes under 'marriage': you become legally 'one' with the other person, financially 'one', you start living together, you publicly say to society/ church/ family/ friends that you are committing your life to the person; you know your life goals, callings and future plans coincide; and if you're saying this commitment despite not having any sexual bonds with the other person, that's a far stronger way of saying 'I truly love you more than anything and i'm committed to spending my whole life with you for who you are - your character, personality, opinions and beliefs'. Also, if they have been in a relationship for a while, what's stopping them from getting married!

Having an official legal ceremony is totally different than not having it. I have lived with someone and also been married and they are entirely different.

+Elizabeth Finney amen, great answer! Had to screenshot it XD Seeing marriage as a union in all aspects. That perspective reminds of the value of marriage, which has steadily been lost

+JADiaz10 A marriage is not just a paper, it is a holy sacrament that means that the holy spirit is connecting the two persons so they become ONE. This sacrament is the human participation in that divine love which has been 'poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit' (Rom. 5:5). According to St. Augustine, the Third Person of the Blessed Trinity in God is the 'consubstantial communion' [communio consubstantialis] of the Father and the Son. Through the Sacrament of Matrimony, the Spirit forms 'communion of persons' between a man and woman. Therefore we believe that there is no divorce after marriage because God has united the two persons and not a sheet of paper.

A true Christian man will forgive you.

DisneySinger12 SAME HERE. I messed up really bad last year & turned into a very sexually active girl (I was 17) for a guy I was only with for 6 months that treated me horribly. I'm scared that I'll meet someone and they'll see me as a used car or something. I'm not having sex again until I'm married though.

it depends

taylor etoria The amount of sex one has doesn't matter and shouldn't matter to anybody, except for cased of adultery. The Bible doesn't say that sex has to be done in marriage. The problem is that many modern translations speak against "sexual immorality" and/or "fornication", but the word from the original Greek text is "porneia", which only means "prostitution." And in Greco-Roman Pagan cultures, temple prostitution was common form of people worshipping fertility gods and goddesses. The problem wasn't premarital sex. Also, getting married before having sex can have the opposite effect to what you are implying it has. For instance, if one meets somebody, and gets married to them before getting intimate, they are much more likely to be disappointed and find themself trapped during marriage in a situation in which they find that they are not sexually or emotionally compatible with the person.

+Aldora LaPlume I think it is about the promise ánd the people involved. If you marry someone, you should have good reason to believe they will held up their part of the promise. One can only have a good view of this if there is clear and open communication beforehand. In my country the mindset of a lot of the secular people is that a marriage is not worth much, because the promise is easily broken. The problem is not so much that marriage is an outdated thing, but that the value of making and keeping a promise has been degraded. What I think is the problem is that people don't realise that keeping a promise requires work, especially in a marriage. One can for instance not expect to to have a good relationship if you don't have time for your partner because of your career. It is important to frame a marriage in the right way. The more secular view sees a marriage kind of as a car. It arrives new, but as time goes on wear and tear changes the car. Sometimes you can accept those changes, and sometimes you have to replace small or bigger parts. But there is a chance that something will hit your car, and that it will be total loss. The high chance of a broken car is just part of having one, but with a bit of luck you can drive years in it. Another way to frame marriage is to view it as your garden. You promised to keep it as neat as possible, and as such are constantly mowing the lawn, cutting branches and throwing away the leaves. Doing those things are sometimes hard work, but you will always feel great when you are done. There are certain seasons, sometimes there is less fruit, sometimes it is more work, sometimes there are a lot of butterflies, and sometimes it is easy to relax. I personally think such a view is much better, as it is much more about your personal responsibility then about degradation and negative change.

Marriage is supposed to be a promise that you won't leave no matter what happens for the rest of your life - something romantic relationships don't have. Just because you can divorce doesn't mean you look at marriage like it's just a relationship.

Though There is divorce Jesus made it where plain that anyone who divorces his or her spouse for any of reason then because of adultery sins. So according to Jesus unless they are cheating on you it is a sin. We have a lot of legal laws that contradict God's laws. So many divorce thinking it's just like a break up, many in the church thinking it's okay. Moses follows and church type people asked Jesus about the whole certificate of divorce thing and Jesus said for the hardest of man's heart Moses permitted man for a certificate of divorce but from the beginning it was not this way. Jesus finished by saying unless they are cheating on you you cause them to commit adults by divorcing then. This is the only exception Jesus ever gave to divorce and he is God and the highest word so I kinda have to go with this. Being God he is greater than Moses. Hope this helps

Sorry I type fast and in a hurry so many of my comments are full of typos. I need to slow down lol.

Dionna Taylor to become atheists

Just Bool it I can see why you are, with an rude attitude like that...

Just Bool it I accepted you as one, but you can't accept me as one. That makes no sense fam.

+Just Bool it Yes I am a virgin, and I don't know what kind black women you've encountered with but i'm a young black woman with morals, self respect, and I know my worth. Also, I've seen how black men are and it's hard to believe you're a virgin but it's not impossible. If anything, it's the black men who gave me grief and rejection about being a virgin. However, unlike you, I know all black men aren't the same. Maybe you should know all black women aren't the same as well instead of knocking us down.

***** Also, is your mother a black woman? You want some man to disrespecting her off another's man simple minded opinion about black women?

***** obviously those females have no morals nor dignity.

+Hailey Schueneman thank god for this comment, i totally agree with you. as long if you're not hurting anyone and there is consent sex its all good

+Hi Cow People have hurt me and they had no idea they did. This flimsy rule doesn't work. Sorry.

Yeah but thus video is about JESUS so you'd have to take it up with him :-)

Psychologists call that being a psychopath.

Totally agree, couldn't have said it better my self! See you in hell :)

Oliver Willis You're saying that too lightly.

you're taking it far too seriously

Claire McFly If you live together in one household ("leave your parents"), want to have a future together and the two of you do not want to break up with the other one, and you sleep together you do actually fulfill all the requirements of being married in God's eyes.

Claire McFly believe In Jesus. Repent of your sins for Jesus is coming soon!

"Religious channel"

It's cool, we still love you! The vid laid out God's purpose for sex. People take it or leave it. Many have to crash and burn before they realize the right way unfortunately. It's just facts.

I am as a virgin would only marry another virgin girl I don't want one night stand girls.

The Greater Somalia President I lost my virginity last year. not in a one night stand though I was in a relationship I thought was "serious" at the time. I seriously regret not waiting but I chose to not have sex again until I'm married. I'm just trying to say that not everyone that loses their virginity was a one night stand

taylor etoria If it was serious relationship it would have been marriage. If he was serious jr would have first marry you than sex after.I will only lose my virginity to a Virgin girl so we can lose it together.To me it wouldn't be special with a non Virgin girl because she has experienced it muliple times before.

Is it wrong for an unmarried woman to be in just underwear or a bikini kissing on a guy?

Jaefar SABNW yes

Josiah Blackstock why are Christian's scared of sex?

Jaefar SABNW The fact that your asking that question shows that you really dont seem to be getting the point of what Jeff was saying. Lust and sex outside of marriage is not okay and has its consequences. So even if you're trying to push that so far you will most definitley just get sexually frustrated and eventually end up going all the way. If he's not your husband he doesn't truly belong to you anyway for you to be doing certain acts with him. That's dishonoring yourself and him. It's your choice at the end of the day. But ask yourself thos where is your heart. Is it with Jesus or with your flesh?? Like Jeff said, where do you find the most joy. What will you do you do to avoid unecesarry heartache. You have free will.

Sounds some kind of hell threat.