I've often been told, "You're too sensitive" ,and " You're too serious", and "You think too much."

living with Quiet BDP is hell, we internalise instead of acting out. We learnt early on that our core being means nothing and so feel incredibly invalidated by the people we are suppose to count on to build us up as children. So we have an unstable sense of self and become very alert and protective over ourselves...any rejection causes intense internal reactions which people don't see or understand...misunderstood? Totally.

I have it and I find that toxic people are attracted to me for the pleasure of abusing and using me. I keep to myself and I live alone in order to stay calm and away from people.

The most painful self destructive disorder

I am not manipulative but I do have harsh internal criticism of myself and everyone around me (not by choice, I hate viewing the world as so suspicious and distrustworthy)

@ 20:33. “Because if I’m pretending to be everything that you want me to be” In the back of that is “cuz you wouldn’t like me if you knew what I was really like, so even if you say you really like me, I can dismiss that because YOU. DON’T. KNOW. ME.” her demeanor when she was saying this changed and it is so me. It was very accurate and scary for sure.

These women deserve more recognition. For me, they really understand BPD and the despair that it causes.

From my observations, expirience and logical deduction I can tell that highly sensitive people are likely to develop bpd especially when they are not raised, cared for, understood, validated and taught properly how to cope with their emotions and thoughts in childhood. You don't need to have big trauma to become highly sensitive, some are just born highly sensitive and, well, more respoding to environment and through that likely to develop bpd. That's pretty logical. Much love for you all striving and facing bpd, it is fucking hard, long and lonely road, a fight for ourselves, for better life for us and people around us, for surviving, for good life. We are struggling, we all have the good and the worse in us and we need to face that and fight for ourselves. Keep going, I am on that road for years now and I have finally started to believe in myself . And I believe in you all. Keep going. With courage. Don't feel it, it is ok, courage is learned, like most things. Cannot courage? No need to worry, courage cannot exsist without fear. Do it anyway, with fear, but do. That's courage. Keep going. Do good for yourself. And keep going.

Hearing that what others perceive as 'manipulation' being explained like this by a mental health professionals almost had me in tears. When I first got diagnosed the psychiatrist in the hospital told my parents I am manipulating them to get attention and I was standing right there. The nurses also treated me like shit sayin 'oh another one of these borderlines, they should try going to the ward 5 (psychosis) and see what being ill really means. They're just spoiled brats.' Years after that I really thought I was manipulative so I moved away and lived on my own so my family would not see me cry, cutting myself or being depressed because I was scared that it would be 'manipulative'. The fact that anything I did was perceived as manipulative damaged me so much, I started doing drugs to deal with my problems. I fortunately never fell into it and now I am recovering. God bless these women who speak for us who are so misunderstood by the system!

Very wise women here. I don't know if I should say this, but... I was extremely abused and neglected as a child. I need validation because I often don't even know what's real or who I am. NOT because I'm egotistical. I don't even know if I have an ego.

I have bpd and have had bpd for as long as I can remember. I remember feeling overwhelmingly sad when I dissapointed my mom at age 11 and wanting to die because of it . I've never been the mean or angry type frankly I rarely feel those emotions . I often feel overwhelmed with sadness or feelings of emptiness . I'm extremely empathetic and if someone is hurting it makes my heart hurt too. I wish people tried to understand this disorder more because it's not very pleasant to live with. I'm constantly fighting with my own thoughts that are telling me I'm not worthy of being loved because of the way I am. It makes me ask for constant reassurance feeling like the ones I love are going to leave because of my constant intense emotions . I go out of my way for the people I love and rarely put myself first . I love helping others . BPD doesn't make us mean or evil we are just people who are constantly at war with out thoughts and feelings . We feel hopeless and misunderstood. We feel alone because"normal people " don't feel things as intensly as we do so how could they understand. I wish people who lack in understanding would offer more compassion and maybe try to read up on the disorder .or ask the person what's on their mind .

I’ve was diagnosed with BPD/Bipolar 41 years ago. This life has been nothing but a daily struggle. I can’t even count how often I think of ending it. But the Lord has me here for a reason. I’m still trying to understand. I just lost my 3rd job in two years due to covid and my misunderstood “behavior.” I’m getting too old for this. I’m thankful there are others who understand, though I’ve never met another person with BPD... I still feel so alone. Thanks for your helpful comments.

I would describe it as having emotions with a 3rd degree burn, where every emotion is just excruciating. So much so that you will avoid relationships for that reason. Anything can set you off. It could be as simple as not responding immediately to a text.

I'll tell you exactly what it is like..I'm a giant walking raw nerve...

I've just recently been diagnosed with BPD and I'm so happy I came across this. I can't make excuses for my behaviour, but this makes me feel less of a "bad" person. Thank you.

This is one of the best discussion about Borderline Personality Disorder out there! I dont understand why this doesnt have more views!

Back in 2013, I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. I was so distraught and so ashamed, I convinced myself that my therapist at the time was stupid and had no idea what she was talking about. I went home that day and watched so many videos on BPD. I was so angry that my therapist thought I had this disorder. I never went back. Five and a half years later, one failed relationship, I really wish I had had this video to see the day I was diagnosed, because I wouldn't have felt so ashamed or like I was broken. I wouldn't have been so scared to get help. The stigma is so real and it is so sad. Thank you for making this video.

“Intense emotionality” is NORMAL in childhood when borderlines are “made” and calibrated by abuse, invalidation, and/or neglect.

BPD is a totally horrible place in life to be,everyday is a struggle,I have really intense abandonment issues,intense quilt intense feeling empty,misunderstood,to the stage of feeling I don’t belong,I’m always feeling I’m having to explain myself and I really can’t help how I am,I have multiple moods hour by hour,overly a people pleaser,and constantly trying to fit in ,rejection is a trigger for me, I self loathe myself,all because of my childhood,I was abused by one parent,and neglected by the other ,life is a struggle.

The stimga that it's a female disorder is offensive and also invalidating to males who have the disorder

High sensitivity can be a distinct advantage to creative people. I turned to writing, and found a great deal of satisfaction through it. It’s not necessarily a weakness. Properly harnessed it can be a great blessing. I would not want to cure it. Also some great actors and poets struggled with depression or bpd. The legacy they left was priceless. I’m glad they didn’t get “cured”.

I have BPD, and I am not manipulative. I cannot think or plan ahead in order to be manipulative.

What a great example the too sensitive smoke detector is! Super way to describe it!

For those who do not know what this disorder is, the films "Girl, Interrupted" and "Black Swan" feature a character with Borderline Personality Disorder. Both were very therapeutic for me when I had my worst struggle with this about ten years ago. You can get better.

This video gave me so much hope. I never knew what my disorder was, but EVERYTHING they stated struck a chord with me and brought me to tears because I never understood why I was the way I was and no one else really could either. I'm so grateful that I have a starting point now so I can look for and find the solution.

Such an important discussion. I especially appreciated the part explaining about how they are not being manipulative. My heart goes out to people suffering from BPD. Thank you for putting this video out to help people.

I was just diagnosed with BPD. This video has helped me understand so much about myself. I'm overwhelmed with gratitude and shook from this video. Thank you so much.

Nurture and nature play a role in BPD. Untreated and unsupported BPD survivers are at war with themselves not the world. Have you ever been alone in a room full of people? Thank you ladies for this video

Thank you ladies. My motto for over 20 years has been: "Love is the answer regardless of the question (except maybe chocolate)!" (I'm a "quite" BPD and I think, if they saw this, my friends and family would be VERY surprised to know what I experience on the inside). I'm someone who was BORN overly sensitive (possibly damage to the amidala by longterm cortisol exposure through pre-birth stress whilst my mother was in an insane asylum (as they were still called in the 70's)...who knows). I think if it were to boil down to one word I'd probably choose: Lost (I have 8/9 elements, I killed the "Jealousy/I hate you, don't leave me" thing when I was 17/18 years old after dumping someone lovely and wonderful for no reason at all than she'd had a chat with someone at a party). Thankfully I realised that was an unrealistic reaction and "decided" to never do it again and I'm pleased to say I haven't. So you CAN overcome (at least some of) these elements you don't want and keep what you feel is fundamentally you. I've got a loooooong road ahead, but someone who loves me unconditionally (along 7 various fluffies) and they keep me going, saving my life every single day. Good luck those of you who have it (you CAN do it) and just a little "Patience" (ok, probably a lot!) to those who love someone with BPD. Love - From someone who wears their heart on their sleeve ;)

It's not just that the entourage doesn't understand, the entourage are often subjected to abuse by the borderline if the borderline is trying to wedge them into their black and white thinking. My mother had these symptoms and she had terrible boundary issues, huge anger, paranoia and various types of aggression.

It's really sad that people with BPD get such a bad rap. Yes, there are those with BPD that should be locked away. But the majority of people that have this mental illness, such as myself, don't go around wrecking havoc on other people lives. Like many BPD I had a troubled childhood, and managed to hold it together, until I had a breakdown during my middle age. I was stunned with the diagnosis, because I knew something was wrong. Yet, during my life I kept a job, stayed away from drugs and alcohol and I continue to contribute to society in a positive. For those who think it's the person's fault that they have this mental illness is stupid. No one ask for this mental illness it was brought to me, through child abuse, and a family with a history of mental illness.

I just need to say, as someone with BPD, thank you. This explains exactly how I feel. I feel as if I'm always trying to get people to understand me, but I'm always coming up against this idea that I'm 'too sensitive'. This video is such a relief and I'm sharing it with my loved ones.

Agencies and therapists that preemptively turn down someone with BPD obviously aren't very good at their job, are they?

What's painful is the love I got from someone with borderline personality disorder was everything I was ever looking for, but it came with the grave price of abuse, rage and emotional scars. Sad, because I am a woman of intensity and enjoy deep romance. It's a shame that the only place I've found it was from a place that prolifically gave it due to desperation and illness. My heart goes out to those with this disorder, and those scarred by those with this disorder.

This made me cry I've kept denying to myself I have this but everhtime I watch videos I just ball up that someone understand and is speaking how I feel when I could never put it into words myself

Thank you so much for this, it's difficult for me - someone with bpd- to explain my disorder to people, they never seem to understand, take it seriously or care

we need to reduce the stigma of BPD massively x

If you know someone with BPD or are in a relationship with one, ENCOURAGE them to see a therapist, but explain that they are not broken. Instead let them know that it is to help them cope with their disorder.

Notes 8:20 appears to shut down on the outside, but in the inside everything is imploding 12:20 attempt to regulate themselves. Need a validation 15:18 to shut it down. To bring the intensity down. Immediate relief from WHATEVER it is that you did. Backlash: - other people's reaction to what you did - your own sense of helplessness (feeding the cycle) 17:51 3 characteristic of a highly emotionally sensitive person - a very sudden reaction to an emotional stimulus - a very intense reaction - slow return to baseline Watch: Back on the edge. Not manipulative

What irritates me most as someone with BPD is that yes, it is emotional hell and it's not like we're sitting over here acting like freaking morons on purpose. I would give anything to NOT have this disorder but I can't find a therapist willing to walk through this with me and STICK WITH ME when I am mentally unstable. The second there is instability, despite promises to be there, I get dumped EVERY TIME. I am over it and have removed myself from therapy. Well, guess what? I am doing BETTER than I have in 10 years because I quit therapy that doesn't work. It's a money pit of hell.

I have BPD and feel as though I have it really really really bad. Finally just have shut the world off because I’m tired of self sabotaging myself and relationships blowing up in my face. My emotions are all over the place. I feel joy and then a moment later I feel intense sadness and hopelessness. I don’t feel very close to anybody in my life who are my friends and my family. I don’t feel we have a very good relationship. Except my daughter who is four years old but I’m afraid that when she gets older I will lose her too. And then I’ll have nothing

I LOVE my friend who has BPD. she’s a co worker and she’s a joy in my life…not always. Ha ha. I understand her struggle. I know she plans to do better. Sometimes she just can’t. She’s worth the ride. She’s worth my friendship. I’m glad she’s in my life…not always..lol ❤️. She’d agree.

11:10 I watched that documentary. I learned a lot. I’m a BPD recovery patient, and was raised by an untreated BPD mother. The interpretation is accurate in the way that the behavior itself is manipulative. However, we are actually suffering because it feels like the worst has happened. We are aware that dysregulation is on because you get physically symptoms like palpitations and sweating. Triggers everywhere. At the beginning we react in the most inadequate and destructive ways. Yes, that causes pain to ourselves and our loved ones. Then, when we are recovering we can do better because we know and we have learned tools to live a better life. Far from being perfect, we are thankful with those few people who have loved us along the way. And thank you for creating these contents on mental health to help break the stigma.

I was diagnosed in my 20s with BPD. I'm now in my 40s and no longer qualify for the diagnosis. However, my emotions are still very intense, and I have worked very hard to get to the place I am now. Being medicated made me feel subhuman because of the severe blunting of my feelings. I HATED it. So I work hard to manage myself so I never have to go back on any meds. I've made multiple suicide attempts and had a serious substance abuse problem. I no longer drink, ever; I just can't afford to risk that slippery slope. I always feel a separation between me and everyone else around me, except my own children who all also have mental illness or other issues that mean we are able to relate on a much more intimate level emotionally and intellectually. So it is very isolating. It takes a lot of practice over and over to not act on the big emotions when they come. It looks like impulsiveness but it's actually an attempts to solve the problem of the overwhelming sense of an avalanche wall of emotion that is crushing me.

I have BPD and I found these women really understanding and knowledgeable in the sense that they really feel out and care about how it feels to have symptoms of this.

The "'Back from the edge" documentary, mentioned at 10:45 is really good indeed. It gave me so much relief, watching it, to hear and see BPD people talking about their innermost feelings and distress, their self harm, etc. I really felt surrounded, watching it.

This is incredible. Everyone should watch this because it exactly how bpd is. There is way too much misinformation out there.

My exes all call me "Fatal Attraction Jackson"...yeah I can laugh about it finally at 55.

What a kind and empathic way to look at BPD. It's wonderful to watch them talk with respect and kindness. People who have this are in intense pain and unless there are traits of disorders like NPD involved, don't think the sufferer intends to cause another pain or harm, wish people could understand the sensitivity involved here.

Holy fuuuuuuuuuuuuck.... This discussion was mind blowing. These ladies have got the facts straight

My goodness. One of the reasons a person with bpd might feel misunderstood is how others react when blasted with hatred and vitriol on the turn of a dime without any warning. Not many people want to experience that from the bpd person repeatedly.

I have spent years trying to understand Borderline people. I thought I had watched every youtube video on the subject. Then KZfaq's all knowing search algorithm finally got it right by showing me this video.

I was married to a B.P.D. wife and her problem was Depression, anger about depression and it was all my fault for causing the issue within her. She was very defensive always and that included in therapy. Not being honest with anyone or her therapist. The cutting off of communication with anyone who does not 100% agree with her misperceptions. She is a scorched earth type of person to divorce from. Absolutely no friends because of perceived sleights, except her parents and sister. No friends from Grammer School, middle school, High School, College, Neighbors, co-workers. Very lonely.

I found out I had a diagnosis of BPD when i was leaving my monthly psychology appointment. The diagnosis was written on my discharge sheet. So much for respecting me as a person. The Dr had never spoke of this or hinted at this difficulty in 3 month visits in the seven years of therapy. Trust is something the profession is losing. I am very unhappy with the treatment, but that is the only place in town to go. So I have a very good psychologist. I am thankful for that. Your program was very helpful to me. Thank you all

I didn’t get my BPD diagnosis until I was 36 years old and I felt relief. My life and behaviors started to make sense and it was like a light bulb coming on. Ever since then I’ve worked hard to understand myself. Why I am the way I am, and to become minutely self aware of my actions. I work on myself everyday and I’m finally feeling seen and understood when I look in the mirror.

I don’t even know what the word manipulative means. It seems as if you reach out for help, attempt to communicate how you think/feel or make the mistake of telling someone you feel suicidal they think you’re being manipulative & then proceed to abuse you even more. Then they wonder why you lash out & disassociate 🙄.

Not all BPD are the same, and not all BPD's ruin lives. AND a lot of us go to therapy and go to DBT

The most insightful discussion of BPD. Never even knew how real this emotional disorder is. Learned things that I never thought I would. As if a door opened to a secret room, where the answers to questions I have had for so long would begin to fall in place.

As a person with BPD I am greatful for you guys! You have validated and you see me.

I have BPD and was with a narcissist. Why are we drawn to those types of people?

All I can say is that my family member who has low spectrum BPD wasn't born with it. His relationship with his cold and manipulative mother created it.

I think I was beaten into BPD.

I have BPD and I never tell anyone. Its horrible to live like this. At the age of 55 I now never leave my apt. and have no friends or family because of my behavior. I hate this disorder.

This is the best brief discussion on BPD I came across on youtube. It should come up as the firsg result when you search for BPD instead videos of disturbed patients sharing misinformation.

I appreciate this discussion but I have a family member who has low spectrum BPD and he has never ever not known who he is. He has never had a problem with his identity or with knowing what is important to him. Please mention that it is a spectrum Disorder. Also, there are a lot of BPDs who are empaths. But overall you were compassionate and you treated BPDs humanely. I have gone to the hospital with my family member because he was very depressed and he wanted and needed help and when the ER psych or the general ER doctor found out he had BPD their comments were: " you are here because you have BPD and you want attention!". I kid you not!!! He wanted help not their freaking attention for the sake of whatever!!! He was mentally abused at their hands. He cried when he heard them say that. He didn't lash out at them. But it made him feel like others see him as a demon! I tried to comfort him. Eventually, he just accepted it and said that it's those doctors' loss not getting to know a BPD person who would show them that he isn't manipulative and all about chaos.

Thank you all 3 of you are helping me understand my self xo

20:33.... omg pretty much my exact words I’ve used numerous times to describe how I feel . You ladies are amazing. You made me feel validated and not so much like a broken piece pretending to be whole so no one sees the truth of how I’m not the same.

Thank you to the three beautiful women in this video for breathing light and hope into the lives of those who suffer from or live with someone with BPD in their lives

This is the first time that I watch a video about BPD till the END! Good talk relatable examples and wonderful metaphors!!!

I was with a diagnosed borderline man. It was a nightmare. If I didn’t answer his text in a quick enough manner he perceived it as total abandonment and set out to make me pay. It was always my fault, when no fault was there. He was malignant. Always telling me about women that wanted him and how much better they were. I wondered if histrionic was baked into the cake. It was painful because I never knew his true self. His attacks were relentless and harsh. I had to just go no contact.

Thank you for this. It is the first time someone effectively explained in a logical way how the disorder influences the individual's response to triggers and and the chronic cycle of intensity which can be extremely painful and leave many desperate to get any relief, even for a few minutes. This should be in every MH practitioner's back pocket!

I was diagnosed with BPD years ago but just recently I was 'counter' or differentially diagnosed by a famous professor of psychiatry as having a childhood trauma explaining my symptoms.This discussion is a great help and I thank you very much for putting it online. The smoke alarm analogy is great. I am taking that it doesn't really matter exactly what diagnostic category one is placed in within certain limits (if you have a personality disorder but are diagnosed as having a psychosis or being bipolar then the ramifications could be serious just in terms of the medication that would be prescribed...not to mention the stigmatization) because it is by analogy like botanical labels. What counts is what one can do to make the best of things....to not consider oneself as a victim because even if one was dealt some challenging cards what counts is making the best of things....if there are genetically based weaknesses then of course it exponentially increases the load but even then it is up to us to find the best ways to manage them.

I’ve done every NHS program over 15 years. Upping meds isn’t a solution. I’m 25 and I take 9 pills a day. This is absolutely on point! My left arm is only scar tissue 🤷‍♀️I can’t afford these ladies, your not allowed to heal unless your rich.

OMG that is me !!!! I wished I could get help from these women ! Where i'm from I feel like know one cares. I live in a small place where they don't want to treat BPD patients. Thank god it's more talked about but still a huge STIGMA ..therapist are scared of treating BPD patients.

Being the abused child of a BPD mother is extremely painful - even now - I'm 61 and she's 78.

This has helped come to terms that I’ll be alone the rest of my life and it’s for the better. My family doesn’t even try to understand.

The anger comes from sexual abuse, as well as other abuse

It's nature and nurture, I'm the 10th child and the 4 oldest are 'perfect', they don't understand me at all. The 3 of the 4 youngest have great difficulty. My brother 1 yr younger had a mentor from the age of 12 and he seems better able to manage life.

Such a compassionate view of this disorder. Ive heard alot of terrible stuff about us being untreatable and just basically toxic people. Its only helped me suppress my shadow even more and not want to admit whats really the problem to anyone esp psychologists ect. Really helpful and probably life saving video for many of us thankyou so much

Best video on bpd I have ever seen. Like I say to people if you don't understand bpd you won't understand me.

I struggle so much with this illness

I have BPD and this is spot on!! Thank you so so much for this!!

Here it is, in a nutshell, all based in childhood experiences: if you reject or invalidate me AND MAKE ME HATE MYSELF, then YOU are bad and I hate YOU. Conversely, if you accept and validate me, then you are GOOD and I “love” you. If you alternate regularly between accepting and rejecting me, my maladaptive response to your treatment of me becomes ingrained and second nature, and I come to see everything through a distorted lens of all or nothing, good or bad, black or white, failing to see the truth that someone or something who is less than perfect is not ALL bad. These dynamics play out in childhood when we are building our identity and self esteem, or lack thereof, through internalizing how others treat us. We become divided against ourselves.

I can't thank you enough for advocating for this illness

One thing that helps me is awareness. It sounds strange but with BPD, I assume that everything I feel is real because I'm feeling it. But if I sit back and question if I really feel that way & why, then sometimes I can talk myself out of a negative emotion. Maybe this will help someone out there. This is so hard sometimes and I really want to give up, but I thank God every day for the strong relationship I have with the people in my life who support me and try to understand me. That keeps me going.

It has indeed been linked with early childhood neglect in the past. Also, some people consider some of their actions maybe because some people with BPD have NPD comorbidity which leads the person to actually indeed be manipulative as well as reactive in "crisis episodes"

Thank you. Finally I don't feel alone, and finally I see that there are good therapists out there. But where are you? ...........Thank you for the video. Very bright, caring ladies.

Its so ironic I dated a person with this disorder for 5 years. I knew somthing was wrong but didn't know what it was. I have been practising Mindfullness Meditation and took the MBCT course. I always treated him kindly through some bad episodes of him acting out, and one rage incident. In the end after taking him back after a breakup, he again became overwhelmed and broke up with me. I sent him two loving texts which he thanked me for and he moved on quickly to another partner, which is quite common from what I have learned. A very very tortured soul.

I am so happy that I have been so open to learn more about myself. All this info online is helping me to put things into perspective. 🤔Never quite understood why my friends and colleagues weren't as sensitive to what was happening around us. I thought "what kind of humans are these"🙈. But ..... I am now learning otherwise🙂. It's so hard though, just to ride out some thoughts. Just let them move through my mind. Because they are not real. And accept that they can affect my perception of people and circumstances. So I have some really objective friends (i love and trust dearly who know and accept me as being different) who I'll bounce/discuss stuff and they help me work through. It's in a normal conversation. I just surmised awhile back that some of my thoughts were/are a tad warped and I needed a rational/less emotional being to hold a discussion. Work in progress. If a day starts so bad. I work to end it well. When that doesnt happen when I wake I try to treat that as a new and fresh start. Constant work. It can be lonely too because some of this stuff is cyclical (n u know u've already gone thru this with some friends already). N e ways I genuinely cannot allow/afford an emotional downtime for too long. Yea. I know someone out there will know what I'm talking about.

Validating attention isn't covered by my insurance.

Thank you for making this video. I have shared it with a few important people to me.. with hope they will understand me better. It is truly so hard to live with this. Everyday is a struggle.

I suffered PTSD and developed BPD along the way when I was a teenager. I had therapy,undergone medications and it helped with the trauma. But after years of feeling “cured” it found its way back,and it’s worst. I’ve burnt bridges and lost so many people along the way. Now my episodes are so heavy, I don’t even want to talk to anyone to avoid petty arguments that would lead to anxieties and too much stress. I’ve recently been under a lot of pressure and being away from home makes it worst. I used to scribble a lot,and I know I’m back to phase one because I can’t write anymore. It’s so cloudy inside my head. I can’t have positive thoughts. I’m so lost. We BPD’s doesn’t want to make the lives of people around us miserable,it’s a thing that we can’t control. I hope the world will stop the stigma. We need help. That’s why we need attention. 🥺

How to fix when they get mad and shut down? I'm trying to understand my loved one... an amazing human being.

This is brilliantly explained

Can’t help but be cynical that people put thumbs down when this is so direct & on point lol cmon people.

Best programme I have ever watched about BPD. So brilliantly explained.

Absolutely best video on bpd thank you very much

I just got dumped by my therapist.. she told me to journal and said she was there for me then she gave up on me right when I needed her most!! I have no idea what to do next, she's transferring me to someone else, how do I or any of you move on and trust? I can't get over it and just want to cut the hell out myself but I feel bad afterward and.... Im just lost any ideas

Here in Mississippi where I live, most psychiatrists and counselors don't even know how to treat BPD, nor do they usually diagnose it. It is very hard for me to get treatment, as a person with BPD, depression, anxiety, CPTSD, and ADD.

Such an amazing discussion! Thanks so much everyone!