Steven Seagal vs Van Damme - Unbiased - Marked For Death / Hard Target

Рет қаралды 778,850

Күн бұрын

Steven Seagal and Jean Claude Van Damme are the greatest action stars of all time, but who's number 1? We put them head to head in a 12 round matchup and compare two of their best movies: Hard Target and Marked For Death to declare, once and for all, that Van Damme is so much better it's really just sad.
#stevenseagal #vandamme #versus #spaceice
0:00 Introduction
0:43 Round 1 Better Hair
1:46 Round 2 Better Runner
3:00 Round 3 The Story
3:52 Round 4 Better Co-Star
5:19 Round 5 Better Villains
7:06 Round 6 Craziest Kill
8:34 Round 7 Best Line
9:31 Round 8 Most Intimidating
11:01 Round 9 Better Vehicle Shootout
12:30 Round 10 Better Fire
14:02 Round 11 Better Henchmen
14:40 Round 12 Weirdest $#!+

Пікірлер: 3 300

@SpaceIce Жыл бұрын

Check out my Patreon for ad-free and censorship free videos: patreon.com/Space_Ice

@babyoda1973 Жыл бұрын

Did I really didn't see Van Damme knock out a snake

@mubarakbayambeadamu6862 Жыл бұрын

Please what's the title of the background song

@Rickety3263 Жыл бұрын

lmaoooo this is by far the best "vs" yet. high energy and hilarious

@joshuasuggs2379 Жыл бұрын

Jcvd I actually had one more point that you accidentally took away

@jasons5904 Жыл бұрын

Brother, thank you so much for these videos. I just found them today. And they are the funniest things I have seen in a very long time.

@P-IN-JP Жыл бұрын

Giving Seagal minus points for no reason without mentioning it is equally awesome to every JCVD movie 😂

@vex_13 Жыл бұрын

*JCVD

@P-IN-JP Жыл бұрын

@@vex_13 hard to type when rolling on the floor from a laughter 😆

@yeisonalvarez5776 Жыл бұрын

This was just fair. It resonates with action movie fans everywhere. Space Ice is the will of movie lovers incarnate

@chaTzon Жыл бұрын

Honestly most van damme movies were good...seagal has just like 4 good movies and the rest is absolut full trash.

@delonehayes7070 Жыл бұрын

I thought I missed something and had to go back to make sure, when I realized he was getting negative points every round I was dead🤣😂💀

@mihalykorodi2943 Жыл бұрын

"Then he wakes up, and he realizes it wasn't just a terrible nightmare and that he is really in a Segal movie." 😅

@albertenriquez7079 Жыл бұрын

Priceless

@MMABones Жыл бұрын

Jumping out of the building is better than being in a seagal movie.

@mandarkastronomonov2962 Жыл бұрын

😂😂😂

@sFeral Жыл бұрын

and does the right thing

@Satsui_No_Hado Жыл бұрын

This is the fucking best 😂

@mustafachoudhury3368 Жыл бұрын

In 2008, actor Sylvester Stallone declared to the British magazine FHM that "At a party in my home in Miami in 1997, Van Damme was tired of Steven Seagal claiming he could kick his ass so he offered Seagal outside into my back yard." According to Stallone, Seagal made his excuses and left while Van Damme tracked him down at a nightclub and challenged him again. Stallone finished by stating "Van Damme was too strong. Seagal wanted none of it."

@Ovakill22 7 ай бұрын

Fake news segal would snap van damme

@pinkyblinders7352 6 ай бұрын

Dont even need a source or proof of this. Its legit.

@johntynan8161 5 ай бұрын

This Truth

@cosmomontanaro5759 5 ай бұрын

Not surprised. Seagal is just a fat guy. Only thing impressive about him is his height. Van Damme had over a dozen competitive full-contact fights. It's not even close.

@theblitz6838 4 ай бұрын

Who needs proof when JCVD is mentioned? This shit's legit.

@TheAnomaly330 Жыл бұрын

6:56 the -4 for seagal out of nowhere killed me 🤣💀☠

@crushert Жыл бұрын

It made me rewind to check how I missed that 🙂

@amsgame7148 Жыл бұрын

LOL

@rydekk-4644 Жыл бұрын

I love how it goes down the further the rounds go too xD

@ajizzle8334 Жыл бұрын

😭😭😭💀💯

@ajizzle8334 Жыл бұрын

@@crushertme too 🤣🤣💯

@NanarStudios Жыл бұрын

« May the best man, or Seagal, win » That line was fire

@ssoory6343 Жыл бұрын

Before that line he says "the biggest and largest action stars..." to describe them 😆😆

@Deere55 Жыл бұрын

@Michael Henry Tani You mean lack of bias

@peludo87 Жыл бұрын

THIS GUY, HIS HATE FOR SEAGAL AND HIS VOICE ARE GOLD

@perrycoffey5410 Жыл бұрын

That lone was good can you talk normal next time

@IceJJFishArchive 10 ай бұрын

Bro does not regard Seagal as human 💀

@csabaszep8162 Жыл бұрын

When I noticed that Seagal was slowly "gaining" negative points... I wasn't disappointed.

@AlainBoudard Жыл бұрын

Yeah, that's one of the best part 😂

@ptolemeeselenion1542 Жыл бұрын

🤣🤣

@TamuzaKale Жыл бұрын

People are awesowe here... Looks like we are all on the right boat!

@han3wmanwukong125 Жыл бұрын

Yeah, this dude is glorious!

@josephnicolino8529 Жыл бұрын

KZfaq videos of people making fun of him are more entertaining than his movies

@denisbodestean6638 Жыл бұрын

The funniest part was, Seagal loosing points, without the narator saying anything about it 🤣

@westernsharpie Жыл бұрын

lol

@michaelflevier7645 Жыл бұрын

crazy 🤣🤣

@deanm4905 Жыл бұрын

Pretty much everything Seagull does is a loss of points. Whether it is in films or real life.

@magnito20 Жыл бұрын

My wife and I can't watch more than 2 of these in a row without our faces hurting from laughing. Wife nearly laughed herself into an asthma attack over the pigeons

@wangson 9 ай бұрын

Same here. Space Ice's vocal intonations when either propping up Van Damme's awesomeness or Seagal's idiocy. I love every single video he's made!!

@jonathanl3689 Жыл бұрын

He gets stabbed in the chest.... but is saved by his rampant alcoholism. Fuck yeah! Five points Van Damme" That line had me crying laughing 🤣🤣🤣🤣

@1084erick Жыл бұрын

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 my favorite part.!!!

@evanmaes1010 Жыл бұрын

Same! I was dying on that part 🤣

@guilherme5094 Жыл бұрын

👍 f... yeah!

@cristic767 Жыл бұрын

My like came at that moment. And I laughed hard. :D

@MarsMellow84 Жыл бұрын

Sometimes drugs can save your life. 😆

@frankoconnell6745 Жыл бұрын

“Realizing it’s a construction zone where all fines are doubled!” 😂😂😂

@jayfanes1125 Жыл бұрын

One of his best lines

@blitzer6858 Жыл бұрын

Lol

@blitzer6858 Жыл бұрын

That killed me lol

@learicist Жыл бұрын

This killed me

@theunsweetkarmaway9616 Жыл бұрын

I saw 'Marked For Death' in theaters, and the greatest moment was when they pulled out Screwface's head and someone in the audience shouted, "How did they get that through customs?" Every time a video or a fan mentions customs with this movie, I crack up, so bravo, provisimo!

@mikaelbiilmann6826 7 ай бұрын

A former classmate of mine had been watching the beach scene in "Saving Private Ryan" and as they zoomed in on Tom Hanks, where he lost his hearing amid the explosions, he had shouted "Run, Forrest, ruuun!" The theater erupting in laughter.

@Mwwwwwwwwe Жыл бұрын

"Good will always triumph over lazy and stupid" - space ice A true philosopher of our times. Edit 200 likes HOLY BALLS!

@NaderThabet-km5cj 11 ай бұрын

Evil will always triumph because good is dumb. Space Balls

@krrombopulos1618 9 ай бұрын

@@NaderThabet-km5cj bro you have the most underrated reply/comment ive ever seen.

@Mitch_Conner75926 Жыл бұрын

“Seagal shooting random women and children” 😂 had me rolling

@FRANK45CASTLE Жыл бұрын

I know that totally didn't happen in the movie lol, gotta love it.

@mallninja9805 Жыл бұрын

I thought Seagals favorite thing was groping actresses half his age.

@FRANK45CASTLE Жыл бұрын

@@deanjustdean7818 Oh we for sure know its worse. I betcha hes a black market human organ trafficker at the very least.

@ToneysReviews Жыл бұрын

This is literally the most unbiased video that I have ever watched. JVCD deserved at least another 100 points out of the 12 he could have received

@kamps492 Жыл бұрын

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@rsporsche Жыл бұрын

Well one point was mis-counted, it goes from 580 to 581 twice

@nightshade3782 Жыл бұрын

@@rsporsche because he is so awesome, he bugged a point counter

@someguy_namingly 11 ай бұрын

2:40 - "He shows his ability to multitask and steer a pirate ship while in a full sprint" OMG I couldn't stop laughing 😂

@nicklangmusic 11 ай бұрын

“Realizing it’s a construction zone, and fine would be doubled” KILLED ME 😂😂😂

@georgeburke2678 Жыл бұрын

"Takes the diabetic guy from Cocoon and turns him into a total badass........." I laughed out loud at this.

@Mewted Жыл бұрын

crazy shit is it's true...lol... wilford brimley going ham on a horse with his own stunt scenes...! ha..who'd thought. them +5 points are fuck yeah legit.

@georgeburke2678 Жыл бұрын

@@deanjustdean7818 I'm sorry..... I didn't realize this is about YOUR DIABETES.... And not about something funny that was said that had nothing to do with you.

@Mandobird1 Жыл бұрын

"...the final score is out of a possible 12 points. Van Damme 682. Steven Seagal negative 75. Which comes as a surprise, as it didn't seem to be nearly that close..." 😂😂😂

@kamps492 Жыл бұрын

🤣😂

@heyitsvos Ай бұрын

Actually should be 683, SI shorted our boy by 1 point 💔

@claudianreyn4529 Жыл бұрын

"A whole f%#k load of points for Van Damme!" I lost it 😂

@Z_RLBXY Жыл бұрын

Van Damme avoiding those doubled fines is probably the most crucial point in the movie. The consequences would have been huge!

@YingJwo Жыл бұрын

7:30 The guy wakes up, realizes he’s in a Seagal movie and does the right thing by jumping out the window. 🤣🤣🤣!

@guyegardner Жыл бұрын

Please don't ever stop this series!!!! It was neck and neck until the very end! I really thought Seagal was going to pull this one off!

@thesorrow4664 Жыл бұрын

😆

@princegobi5992 Жыл бұрын

Neck and 3 necks

@razamohammad7631 Жыл бұрын

🤣🤣🤣

@commanderkeen3787 Жыл бұрын

I haven't laughed this hard in a while. Great video

@Snyper1405 Жыл бұрын

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@nutshot_brawler8466 Жыл бұрын

I'm so glad you mentioned the old guy in Hard Target, dude was probably my favourite character in the entire film, the way he survived being stabbed was awesome and cracked me up

@ttx3 Жыл бұрын

he was saved by his rampant alcoholism. Great observation 😁😁😁

@darthwiizius Жыл бұрын

Wilfrid Brimley is the actor's name, he was in his 50s when he was in this film.

@ttx3 Жыл бұрын

@@darthwiizius God bless his alcoholism and archery skills ❤️

@darthwiizius Жыл бұрын

@@ttx3 Fine attributes for a healthy and happy life in the Bayou.

@ttx3 Жыл бұрын

@@darthwiizius he is an inspiration

@StevieB8363 Жыл бұрын

Hard Target is my favourite Arnold Vosloo performance. He was sinister, menacing, and stylish. Old-school villainy with class. And Lance Henriksen was perfect as the criminal mastermind. This was a beautiful convergence of a talented cast, Van Damme at his peak, and a director who knew how to use them, while adding a beautiful slow-motion touch to the action scenes. Truly a masterpiece.

@Leitefsj Жыл бұрын

Arnold Vosloo? I thought it was Joe Flacco

@playstationsauruswrecks9521 Жыл бұрын

Even as a kid i was struck by his preformance and watched this movie nearly as much for him as Van Damme

@nunosantos00 Жыл бұрын

Chance didn't hurt Van Cleaf's feelings,he unloaded 2 magazines of 9mm Beretta in his torso and didn't hit the grenades he had there😂😂

@RJMacReady1 11 ай бұрын

Arnold Vosloo is actually just a great character actor. Always enjoyable when he shows up

@Parocha 8 ай бұрын

Specially stylish… he pulled a menacing aura without openly displaying it, and looking dapper AF while at it

@njnil Жыл бұрын

Steven Seagal ran like a Twelve year old girl getting candy and I miss those days. Can't get enough of it.

@someguynamedvictor Жыл бұрын

Where did he learn that arm flailing skill? That type of training can only come from...special forces 😂

@MrNegativecreep07 Жыл бұрын

One the one hand, he does run like a girl. On the other, he will snatch every motherfucka birthday. So it evens out.

@haletosis1380 Жыл бұрын

Now he is no longer able to run at all. I wonder if he misses running though

@tippylongdog1039 Жыл бұрын

@@someguynamedvictor that's natural born flailing right there. It's a skill one's born with.

@Eralen00 Жыл бұрын

It's crazy cause his arm flailing isn't even symmetrical lol. His right arm goes in circles but his left arm just goes up and down

@atlangmojalemotho175 Жыл бұрын

This is the most objective and unbiased head to head review of both movies i've ever seen 🤣

@silvialimeme3706 Жыл бұрын

I am in tears. This was a rollercoaster of emotions.

@arkainreveal2614 9 ай бұрын

"He makes Hawkeye look like a Btch." I having serious abdominal pains right now from laughing 😂😂😂😂😂

@mikeincanada_ Жыл бұрын

I like how we all accept that Seagal losing points without any explanation is normal. Not one comment asking why? :D

@evgenigenov3433 Жыл бұрын

There is no need. Everyone know why.

@Lemon83166 Жыл бұрын

Because his so shit he just loses points because its so shit. Pretty self explanitory

@rickrandom6734 Жыл бұрын

Just laws of the nature. No need to explain.

@Predator20357 Жыл бұрын

I noticed, I just assumed he got given deducted points previously

@rizanzaky616 Жыл бұрын

that's something we learned which is called common sense

@krushingbro6620 Жыл бұрын

i love how seagal suddenly acquires minus points.

@nigelwalker6684 10 ай бұрын

As I’m typing this tears are still rolling down my face minutes after watching. This is absolutely the best unbiased review ever 😭😭😭

@ryanmarkley1979 Жыл бұрын

I was practically crying by the time the final score was given. awesome content, JCVD would approve!

@patrickpaganini Жыл бұрын

I guess he runs like that because of his ehrm un-athletic build? I've never seen a man run like that before.

@MauiTaha Жыл бұрын

"Seagal multitasking here running full speed while steering a pirate ship" after that line I am DEAD

@lovegod1steverythingelse2n47 Жыл бұрын

💀

@bradpitt74 Жыл бұрын

😂😂

@jonathankozenko Жыл бұрын

"Both movies have incredible stories that scholars are still discovering deeper meanings to to this day!" *Shows a loop of Seagal getting slammed into a wall and JCVD punching a snake* I literally burst out laughing from this, I'm not gonna lie!

@blitzer6858 Жыл бұрын

Lol

@hairtrigger8317 11 ай бұрын

I was laughing my ass off at Seagal's points going further into the negative with each round.

@marcgreer4357 Жыл бұрын

"Realizing it's a construction zone where fines are doubled" 😂😂😂

@theitalianguy9979 Жыл бұрын

Dude that running while turning a pirate ship got me man, lmao…

@josephbassey1501 Жыл бұрын

Captain Steven Seagal

@MarphitimusBlackimus Жыл бұрын

Yet another riveting neck and neck, back and forth clash until the veritable photo finish for Van Damme. But I gotta tell you, Seagal is really closing the gap!

@AlainBoudard Жыл бұрын

Well since he is IN the gap, you can say that he's filling it 😅

@bubbajones6486 Жыл бұрын

Having gone full binge on your Steven Seagull series; it’s slowly starting to become apparent that these videos have cured my depression, (ironically enough, the same depression that was caused by watching this series). I’m starting to see the amusement in his running…..this taint scrubber literally looks like he’s trying to gain speed, AND slow down simultaneously…..I genuinely feel that if Steven Seagull was a teen in this era, he’d be “that kid” in class that would make anime sounds every time he moves…..

@magnumopus8124 11 ай бұрын

or that kid who was doing the "naruto run" down the halls. so happy anime wasn't as big as it is now when i was in school.

@BlackAge2k 11 ай бұрын

"May the best men, or seagal, win." had me already. Now that I realize, it took Space Ice 38 seconds to make me laugh.

@alycefrench5753 Жыл бұрын

Your channel is getting me through some really bad times, thanks for your awesome and hilarious narration 😸

@williamedwards4151 Жыл бұрын

Me too. These videos are making me laugh so hard and it's been a while since I've had a good laugh.

@FReNchMoLEy Жыл бұрын

hello french alyce. hope things look up really soon. stay strong

@industrialpictures Жыл бұрын

Space Ice is life, Space Ice is Love

@paulmilesuk1 Жыл бұрын

Keep going, always better times ahead 💪

@classifiedunacknowledged.9878 Жыл бұрын

I can get you out of some bad times😉

@commanderkeen3787 Жыл бұрын

Van Damme's slo-mo running in Hard Target is simply iconic for an action film. But oh man, can you imagine Steven Seagal running in slo-mo, even in his heyday? Audiences would be erupting in laughter

@michaelsanders3629 Жыл бұрын

Even when Seagal runs full speed, he's running in slow motion. 😆

@maemorri Жыл бұрын

I think the merciless ribbing Seagal (deservedly) took in his early films for his clear unfamiliarity with running is why he put on 150 extra pounds, and then used that as an excuse for waddling in all future movies.

@Mwwwwwwwwe Жыл бұрын

"Sprinting while steering a pirate ship"🤣🤣🤣 Limp wristedly slapping the air away to reduce aerodynamic drag while running? 🤣

@Alpostpone Жыл бұрын

@@Mwwwwwwwwe Seagal's technique punches air into submission to force it out of the way

@tianshi2006 Жыл бұрын

It would be like watching the penguin run from batman after gorging at an all you can eat buffet. Fat midget Danny de Vito penguin, not the OG rocky training burgess meredith.

@fxrmike5145 9 ай бұрын

"his FUCKING kicking leg"🤣

@jcmw Жыл бұрын

It was a close one but I appreciate you doing the intellectual legwork of laying out all the evidence for an objective and unbiased comparison.

@firestorm517 Жыл бұрын

I'm amazed you were able to remain so unbiased in this comparison. Truly inspirational!

@kamps492 Жыл бұрын

🤣🤣🤣

@zZzjabzZz Жыл бұрын

Your channel has literally cured me of depression lol. Not lying. Things have been rough but I watch about an hour of your channel on most days & my mind is set right. Laughs are healthy & you've given me many. A huge thank you.

@learicist Жыл бұрын

Same. Only thing that gets me laughing out loud.

@DannyBoy-jy1kq Жыл бұрын

Best content I’ve seen on KZfaq for a long time.

@leszekwolkowski9856 Жыл бұрын

Well then, I think that in a way you can say thatt Steven Segal saved your life.

@donnyjepp Жыл бұрын

Agreed.....Hope you're doing well pal 👍💪😁

@aleksandarnedeljkovic8104 Жыл бұрын

@@leszekwolkowski9856 Everyone loves Steven . . . secretly.

@robbieburns3564 Жыл бұрын

Whenever I have a bad day and feel really sad - I just watch a clip of Seagul running and suddenly I feel 10x better.

@motodunnito Жыл бұрын

JCVD won fair and square. Thank you for the unbiased match up, Space Ice.

@spectrbeats3374 Жыл бұрын

" a whole fuckload of points for VD" had me dying😂😂

@tahahadada1936 Жыл бұрын

😂

@nubianjay7044 Жыл бұрын

Seagal's points going down after every round is pure comedy!!! 🤣🤣🤣

@JL-ix5io Жыл бұрын

Thought provoking and totally unbiased. Thank you 👍🏼

@l4rs3rn Жыл бұрын

Thank you for staying fair and unbiased.

@eivindgjengstjohansen9625 9 ай бұрын

Fair? Van Damme was a cocaine abuser for many years Seagal's issue was his massive ego back when he was an egocentric person.

@evillebron627 Жыл бұрын

"So fast that the friction behind him causes everything behind him to burst into flames." Lmaoooo

@LuciusSicarius Жыл бұрын

I like how unbiased the judge was. Really added a lot of integrity to the contest.

@kinanatto257 Жыл бұрын

Man... The crazy eyebrows lady,,, the Jamaican three stooges, seagull feminine side,,, just examples of this awesome national geographic documentary about real men and, Steven seagull... You made my day.

@Mr_Mack88 Жыл бұрын

JCVD is so cool he had on of the best wrestlers (RVD) name himself after him and Rob Van Dam was pure awesomeness in the ring.

@psyfozim Жыл бұрын

I can't deal with this guy. The scenarios. The point deductions outta nowhere. I'm dying. 😂

@bretthoffman9863 Жыл бұрын

The all fines doubled in construction zone joke killed me.

@TheGeocab Жыл бұрын

It's the one that makes me keep rewatching this one.

@PLACEonPLATE Жыл бұрын

Yes me too

@jonmcdaniel8492 Жыл бұрын

That's the kind of realism that Seagal movies lack that make them hard to watch.

@sengkangbasketballmtb597 Жыл бұрын

This had me rollin hahaha

@ralpushiyeyo Жыл бұрын

Marked for Death is one of Seagal's better films. But you still managed to point out every details of how stupid it is. Good job Space Ice!

@mikehunt4986 Жыл бұрын

@hexed777 Exactly.

@shadowwarrior7218 Жыл бұрын

Does Out For Justice get no love??

@Snyper1405 Жыл бұрын

😂😂🤣🤣

@ralpushiyeyo Жыл бұрын

@@shadowwarrior7218 The only notable thing about that movie was this line "Anybody seen Richie, anybody know why he did Bobby Luffo." 😂

@ralpushiyeyo Жыл бұрын

@hexed777 Hard to Kill for me was his greatest. But Marked for Death is definitely on the top 5

@someguynamedvictor Жыл бұрын

Like a few others mentioned, your channel is the first time in the LONGEST that I've just genuinely busted out laughing. As a depressed person they also help to get out of my head too. I can only imagine what my neighbors think when I'm literally shrieking in laughter.

@dreamonion6558 Жыл бұрын

exactly !

@BlissfulMisanthrope Жыл бұрын

The humor is his voice! Of course the content is great but not everybody can deliver the way this guy can 🍻

@amostlyreasonableguy Жыл бұрын

@@BlissfulMisanthrope he’s also better now than in his videos from 6 months ago. He goes all in with the gritty voice now and it’s perfect.

@BlissfulMisanthrope Жыл бұрын

@@amostlyreasonableguy great observation. I too had noticed that and felt he transitioned into a totally different avatar in contrast to his first few videos! I’ve never come across a humor like this and it’s very very hard to do what he’s doing let alone replicate/duplicate the style. Hope the KZfaq algorithm develops some sense and encourages this rare talent

@joshlingo3013 Жыл бұрын

Me too, this has been having me rolling in laughter.

@Yohanan552 Жыл бұрын

Thank you for your unbiased scientific analysis of both of these action movies.

@thekingofspoons1027 Жыл бұрын

I'm so glad that somebody could go through and legitimately rank these LEGENDS blow for blow, movie for movie, and tally just who was best. It was a lot closer than I thought, too! Absolutely no hate for the winner!

@tylerdurden5122 Жыл бұрын

And how one man can be so completely unbiased is beyond me 😂😂😂

@Tramseskumbanan Жыл бұрын

“May the best man or Seagal win”. Hahaha, priceless 😂

@nighttempest7163 Жыл бұрын

Lance Henriksen performed more stunt in one fire scene than Seagal has in an entire career.

@robjackson8348 Жыл бұрын

The final score out of a possible 12 had me 😂🤣

@mediocreman2 Жыл бұрын

11:17 The construction zone fines doubling got me lol

@jed4235 Жыл бұрын

Perfect review. No bias , straight to the point. Love it

@JMan-The_AntiCitizen- Жыл бұрын

I had to watch Hard Target 19 times before I was able to cognitively process the entire film. The Mullet focus phenomenon is hard to overcome

@javietesparza7451 Жыл бұрын

Cool action movie 😎👍💯

@deand6411 5 ай бұрын

Finally, an objective critique that does not focus on identity politics. Space ice should be a top critic on rotten tomato’s.

@JohnnyDollar720 Жыл бұрын

This channel is criminality underrated

@nakazonegamestreaming896 Жыл бұрын

How can someone be so impartial? Totally unbiased analysis, that is exactly why I am still coming back for more.

@jessehutchings Жыл бұрын

I wish I could see JCVD's reactions to watching his own films. I imagine he laughs his ass off the entire time at how insanely bad ass they are

@felixfranzen7578 Жыл бұрын

The Van Damme mullet in Hard Target is simply majestic! The only way he could top that would be if he choose to combine it with an equally glorious moustache. Too bad there wasn't a sequel. Also, this comparison is not even a contest. Van Damme wins because of the snake punch alone.

@hdofu Жыл бұрын

I'm a bit surprised... I wasn't expecting Seagal to perform this well.

@jekw23 Жыл бұрын

Don’t know what made me laugh more. The “saved by his rampant alcoholism “ line or watching Seagal having points arbitrarily deducted at random!!!!

@peter_shadow7559 Жыл бұрын

😂😂😂😂😂

@jopen488 Жыл бұрын

Only Steven Seagal can reach the -75 level.

@HappyHarryHardon Жыл бұрын

Please refer to his Sir as Sifu please and thank you. Russian citizens deserve all respect 100%.

@dopedrums Жыл бұрын

@@HappyHarryHardon No can do on the Sifu, but Master Seafood can be managed.

@ptolemeeselenion1542 Жыл бұрын

@@dopedrums 🤣🤣

@HappyHarryHardon Жыл бұрын

@@dopedrums I suppose that will have to do.

@TamuzaKale Жыл бұрын

@@dopedrums Hahahaha you are literally killing me here!

@wangson 9 ай бұрын

"...realizing it's a construction zone, where all fines will be doubled, he has no choice but to drive head on..." Jesus!! This video is the gift that just keeps on giving!!!

@detroitmade313 5 ай бұрын

This is my favorite review ever! Van damme takes the guys from cocoon and turns him into a complete badass!😂😂😂😂😂

@chrisp5796 Жыл бұрын

"Of a possible score of 12 points Van Damme 587 Segal -61" That part had me dying laughing!

@peludo87 Жыл бұрын

Hahahahahaha this guy is priceless

@jackcrater9725 Жыл бұрын

Sylvester Stallone once held a party at his house where JCVD and Seagal both showed up. Apparently Seagal was talking shit to JCVD and basically said he could whoop JCVD's ass and JCVD called him out and said sure let's fight then and waited for Seagal outside. Seagal got punk'd and pussed out and ended up just leaving the party.

@ItsNotaTuhmah Жыл бұрын

That story is amazing. JCVD waited in Sly's garden 2 full hours, then went back looking for Seagal. The mofo ran to a night club, where Van Damme went asap he knew. Steven hid for HOURS inside and Stallone and others had to take JCVD out of there, so poor Seagal could leave. Stallone said " Van Damme was TOO Strong and Steven wanted none of it". He also confirmed this actually happened.

@michiel1162 Жыл бұрын

Van Damme has an actual professional Karate record. Who tf would mess with a guy like that

@ThroatShredder1087 Жыл бұрын

I heard about this story more than a few times from different sources too

@disciple8857 Жыл бұрын

I could not keep my composure driving and watching this unbiased comparison of the two most iconic action stars of our time. Thank you for almost making me crash😂😂😂.

@davebolster869 Жыл бұрын

Bonus point at 4:41 to Van Damme for including a quick behind the scenes look at the fire stuntman's prosthetic face and hands.

@kenn756 Жыл бұрын

JCVD is so badass he can go from 581 to 580 points in round 9

@kylethecaregiver4050 Жыл бұрын

Non biased 😆😂 I freaking love these. Makes me hope Steven does more movies just so these continue

@chrisward2245 5 ай бұрын

I love the point system 😂

@johnnyhamilton4548 Жыл бұрын

I never laugh out loud at anything, even stuff I truly find funny. Then I ran across your channel and I actually guffawed out loud, really loud and long. Literally couldn't stop. Unfortunately I was in a particularly boring zoom meeting. The good news is I now have plenty of free time to binge your videos.

@lolilol5346 Жыл бұрын

I lost it at round 4

@jjones9822 Жыл бұрын

Same here. Gut laughs and tears. This channel is a diamond in the rough. Hey Space Ice, how about a Tango and Cash video?

@BH-vh3iu Жыл бұрын

Same here

@SRMoore1178 Жыл бұрын

I haven't laughed in years my friend. Then I saw Steven Seagal "running". Life is good now.

@InstiGator805 Жыл бұрын

Your comment is gonna get me fired 😂

@immortalsaiyan9074 Жыл бұрын

10:34 The way Van Damne pulls back his coat like hes reaching for a gun as Space Ice says "....brandishes the greatest weapon of mass destruction know to man" before kicking those guys to hell had me in stitches Keep these videos coming bro! Having to wait for Friday every week is torture

@chrisp5796 Жыл бұрын

His fucking kicking leg! Hahaha

@immortalsaiyan9074 Жыл бұрын

@@chrisp5796 OHHHHHH FUCK YEAAAAH!!!😂😂😂

@rickwilliams6904 9 ай бұрын

"The henchmen are the Jamaican three stooges." You're killing me man!!!

@DeathRobotKailozo 22 күн бұрын

Thank you, Space Ice. It warms us all to see such objective coverage of two titans of action.

@JMan-The_AntiCitizen- Жыл бұрын

"Saved by his rampant alcoholism" God this content is prime. 10/10 my new favorite movie essay channel 😂😂😂

@AustinJ Жыл бұрын

It’s truly unbiased movie critics like you that are making sure Hollywood creates true masterpieces like Hard Target. Thank you

@MarioMunozBro Жыл бұрын

Bruh the intro of seagul just gettin smashed on a loop had me geeked 😂

@OkinInc Жыл бұрын

Bro, your commentary is perfect. I totally concur with this 100% unbiased comparison between the man Van Damage and Seagull.

@maguffle Жыл бұрын

I love how this is very scientific, balanced and unbiased. I ran a concurrent analysis and came up with the same score as you!

@andrewkelly6828 Жыл бұрын

On Seagal running -- "He shows his ability to multitask, and steer a pirate ship, while in a full sprint..." I'm dying. 🤣

@cgsweat 2 ай бұрын

11:52 Keith David's expression says it all 🤣

@danielgron8954 Жыл бұрын

"where all fines are doubled", hilarious. Thanks for the laughs.

@SomeeGuyy Жыл бұрын

Man Keith David went from "They Live" to "Marked for Death". What a complete tragedy.

@DanJackson1977 Жыл бұрын

Hey, at least we had Gargoyles

@learicist Жыл бұрын

Yyyeeeaaaahhhh

@skinnybub5237 Жыл бұрын

He was in Platoon with Charlie Sheen, Tom Berenger, Willem Defoe and Johnny Depp, he played King. Also he was in Men at Work with Charlie Sheen and Charlie Sheens brother Emilio Estevez. That was an underrated movie, it was hilarious.

@giovannimatias2565 Жыл бұрын

I mean, every actor has some movies they only do for the rack. Plus, his VA career is goated.

@connordunckel8544 Жыл бұрын

He probably didn’t mind the paycheck

@ThePrinceOfNigeria Жыл бұрын

Gotta admit this is the much more funnier version of Cinema sins I've always wanted but didn't know existed *"Van Damme brandishes his kicking leg"* That one got me in stitches.