relationship "corn" + how to stop the comparison to self-loathing cycle

Рет қаралды 76,196

Күн бұрын

👚Merch - shopisla.co
✨All other links - beacons.ai/manifestelle
In this episode of the Spoiled Girlie Support Group podcast, our host Elle dives deep into the topic of relationship "corn." She explains that everything exists on a spectrum, and relationship corn is on the opposite end of the spectrum compared to suffering corn. Some women seek out relationship corn because it gives them hope, but Elle acknowledges that it may be harmful to women who are in otherwise good relationships.
Elle provides actionable tips and insights on how to gauge a truly healthy and stable relationship, including the importance of being in your discernment and curating your social media feed to benefit your life. She emphasizes the dangers of comparing yourself to others and how it can lead to a self-loathing cycle.
Elle also touches on the importance of being for real and not expecting princess treatment from a man who has not historically given you princess treatment. She encourages listeners to have goals and aspirations but to learn to honor what they have today and be realistic about what is possible in their relationships.
Join us as we explore the topic of relationship "corn" and how to stop comparing yourself to others. Don't forget to like, comment, and subscribe for more content like this!
Chapters:
01:47 - what is relationship “corn”?
05:04 - media literacy - everything exists in a spectrum
09:30 - how to stop the comparison to self-loathing cycle
10:16 - step1: check in with yourself
12:37 - step 2: everything is marketing
14:00 - step 3: be for real
19:04 - step 4: be in abundance mindset
20:39 - surprise surprise
22:07 - honor your experience

Пікірлер: 184

@CC-kr3mr Жыл бұрын

My marriage proposal was so elaborate and romantic that it went viral and was on the six oclock news and all of the city blogs. I live in the most expensive city in north america. I am not saying this to brag but to say that it was totally over the top and legit. Unfortunately I’m here to tell you that I was never so miserable in my life as I was on that day. I accepted the marriage proposal because i was young and stupid and had not found my true voice or acknowledged my intuition. I didn’t need him for a meal ticket. Either way I had my own home and business and I came from a good family. He should’ve known that I am extremely private person that is not the type of proposal that I would have wanted, the reason he did it in the way that he did. It’s because I later learned that he’s an absolute narcissist, and he did it to toot his own horn. “Look what i can do and provide”. I was not on cloud nine and we only remained married for five years. What you see is not always the reality. Women should be aware when men do over the top gestures that need to be documented on social media because sometimes it’s about making themselves look affluent or desirable.

@quelquun2018 Жыл бұрын

Eye opener 😮

@devanshijobanputra6232 Жыл бұрын

Yeah honestly... Never thought of that, good work sharing this sis

@realdareal Жыл бұрын

Honestly, I love the idea of those wealthy man taking care of us like that; But in reality what I often see are man feeling they can be disgusting and outrageous just because they give you all those fancy objects and experiences. So it is often too much of a high price to pay. Also, by living that life style, people around you tend to diminish your suffering, they always say is not that bad because he is a good provider. Again, love the idea, but in reality I have not see it work quite right.

@CC-kr3mr 11 ай бұрын

@@realdareal I agree wholeheartedly. They always throw it back in your face. You always pay.

@bunnykatsoracle3275 11 ай бұрын

I appreciate you sharing this. I would be mortified if that happened to me too! I definitely don't get FOMO seeing a public proposal, I'm more like 🤢. I hope you're doing much better now and living your best life ❤

@chamuelolivier1594 Жыл бұрын

When i gave birth to our son and i was at hospital, i was waiting for my husband in order to go back to home. He was late, he looked tired ( i though he was with his friends dinking beers all night) and when he showed up i was mad at him. When i enter the house it was so clean and very tidy. And he cooked a good meal for me, my favourite. That's my definition of happiness. No flower in bed, no luxurious ring ou bracelet, no travel in Bahamas, no gigantic bouquet. i'll never have that. Just love and devotion. My husband is "just" a blue collar but he's a very decent man and i keep him!

@labelle9921 11 ай бұрын

What a blessing you have! Definitely a keeper.

@chamuelolivier1594 11 ай бұрын

@@labelle9921 ❤

@PranaChi369 10 ай бұрын

Sounds like he's a keeper

@chamuelolivier1594 10 ай бұрын

that's what he is. @@PranaChi369

@TrinaMoitra 3 ай бұрын

He sounds like a delight. I would take a “blue” collar … over a blue chip who is a covert narc any day. I am so happy for you. ❤

@mimismithson5372 11 ай бұрын

My boyfriend is not rich, we are both mid way through our twenties, but my god he does everything to provide. Food, petrol money, paying for dates, sometimes random little gifts 🥹 your man doesn’t need to be rich for him to have the provider mindset. He may not be rich now, but he has the right mindset and drive, you gotta have patience with them bestie especially if they’re not actually a broke dusty!

@ARS-fn6px 8 ай бұрын

Women dont have time to be patient. We literally have a biological clock. He has to come correctly immediately especially since women are the prize and theyre NOT.

@maddyedits01 8 ай бұрын

Agreee

@user-fc2tn2eb5z 7 ай бұрын

Are u british?

@saputridewi3665 7 ай бұрын

In my opinion, your BF is rich+has good manly heart Because out there there is some men who don't want to pay the dates&pick up his BF I am happy for you dear🎉😂❤

@lynnielie8312 4 ай бұрын

This is how my bf is 😢 he works two jobs and does his best to support me

@xarecr6550 Жыл бұрын

The market won’t regulate itself but we can. We have the power by coming together to regulate the dating market. We have done that in the past by lowering the bar so low lol. Time to raise it up.

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

perioddddd exactly

@Jennifer_Lewis_Beach_Living 11 ай бұрын

This times infinity.

@elisal98800 7 ай бұрын

They won't change, they will still think we are stuck up and cold blooded. But being nice and not protecting your time and energy from bad people will have consequences on health. Reward good behaviour, punish bad behaviour and never look back.

@alicechase9290 5 ай бұрын

@@elisal98800 So true

@artisticbeautybyhanako6801 5 ай бұрын

The combination of relationship corn and the rise of cottagecore during the late pandemic helped me leave my abusive relationship. I started romanticizing my life and realized that no prince charming would treat me like that. It took a short toxic situationship after, but I finally found my soulmate who thinks I move the heavens💁‍♀️

@momo-sy9wr Жыл бұрын

you’re the right amount of brutal while still empathic to other experiences. thank u for calling me out and making me feel understood at the same time

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

🥹🥹thank you bestie

@alli_sonc Жыл бұрын

this!!!

@user-dn8hd6xn1e 24 күн бұрын

She says everything I’d say to my own daughter.

@tessli Жыл бұрын

The 19 old part hit home, sometimes I forget that 19 to mid twenty is a big age gap regarding where you stand in life (maturity and job wise) and that THERE IS TIME. I have a part time job and am starting college in September and I struggle with comparing myself and my 1y relationship ALL the time with the “ideal relationship” grown, married adults living together are posting about… it’s pretty logic that we can’t afford holidays across the globe or fancy dates. I find this type of content aspirational, encouraging you to put in the work but it’s putting a lot of pressure on young people and relationships by only showing the perfect parts.

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

thissssssss👏🏽👏🏽

@FoundSheep-AN Жыл бұрын

Find and older guy who is already in the right position to spoil you with vacations all over the world … you don’t have to built with your 19 years old guy… chances are, when he will have the means to provide for a girl, he will take a 18years old to Dubai with the money you helped him achieve… don’t be a Bob the Builder…

@Pomagranite167 8 ай бұрын

But always use discernment. There are older men with money who want to spoil you, but you do not just want a rich man. You want a GOOD man who takes CARE of you. I myself am okay with a man who is not rich. But i do love a man who shows effort that he wants to take care of me. If u want a rich man or an older man, you want a GOOD rich man or GOOD older man. Because there are plenty of rich and older men who would love to drain you just as much, and yes, the least they can do is pay, but do not allow them to access you so easliy or drain you just because they are older with more money. They can and they WILL drain you- you are young and beautiful. They all want to access you. You want a man, at whatever age or tax bracket he is in, to be someone who DREAMS AND BREATHES to take care of you ❤ You should still be prioritizing VALUES over everything this man is able to provide. A man with the means to provide who has GOOD VALUES will not make you suffer. A man with POOR VALUES, don't matter how much he makes, will make you suffer.

@AlexandraaParis Жыл бұрын

Can you please expand on the topic of "women have so much inherent worth" in a future video? I feel we are not taught this enough. It's hard to fully fully understand sometimes.

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

noted, bestie ✨ ✨

@at2425__ Жыл бұрын

@@therealmanifestelleespecially the response to the question "what do you bring to the table". Not that we owe anyone an explanation, but if we as women truly don't know the answer to the question ourselves, it can harm us because we lower the bar.

@louiseraskin 11 ай бұрын

Yes please 🙏

@gintaremarc3853 9 ай бұрын

Yessss

@ARS-fn6px 8 ай бұрын

@@at2425__if he asks it automatically means he doesnt like/want you. Also if he wants to go 50/50 he doesnt like nor want you. No man who actually wants you wants you to audition for him. Women create life on this planet. Everything that is good and beautiful comes from a womans mind and creativity. Everything ugly and heinous comes originally from a mans mind. Men KNOW this.. The least they can do is pay for feminine energy since they struggle to suppress the evil in them and they benefit from everything feminine, its ice water to them , heaven to them. Just the presence of feminine energy makes them ease their inner evil thoughts and energies. Since men are evil by nature compared to women. Thats why theyre so angry, lonely and depressed. They know they are below average good at best. Hope this helps.

@Uniquelybeau Жыл бұрын

So happy I found your content 💛“Can we not?” is now part of my positive self talk

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

🥹🥹bestie can we not???

@msonlinemoney6408 7 ай бұрын

@@therealmanifestelle😂

@LammyHowl Жыл бұрын

I love what you said about discernment. Everything we consume must be with purpose, including social media. I strive to make peace with myself and the world around me; I stopped consuming "junk" content years ago because it was doing the opposite of that. I love to learn and laugh, I'm very open-minded but I do not tolerate antagonistic, negative energy in my life. Hard pass. ✌🏻

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

this 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

@MighTestimony Жыл бұрын

I literally feel like I am talking to my bestie who is on the same page as me but is still giving knowledge I needed!

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

you get the vibes bestie ✨

@Angelbean777 Жыл бұрын

I needed this and I feel less alone… I had a friend who constantly flaunted how amazing her bf treats her on social media.. I have amazing chemistry with my partner but it’s not all perfect. I wish I had some things I see others having in their relationships and I suddenly go down a horrible spiral. I wish he could spoil me but he can’t as he’s fixing his life (the financial side) I constantly worry if I’m in receiving mode enough since this whole feminine energy things is getting pushed by others so much. I was ok with 50/50 payments for a while and now I’m bitter and resentful and want to suddenly not pay for things.. because it suddenly feels *unfair* it’s awful and I’m ashamed. I’ve never been a Spoiled person but society is pushing it in our faces that if we aren’t spoiled by her man that we’re basically worthless and we’re doing something wrong or with the wrong person I saw this friend literally screen a text her and her bf had about how she maxed her credit card and how he just gave her more credit and was like “aw my cute little spender” however, she’s vented to me in private about his alcohol problems.. I know it’s not all perfect yet people try to make others feel a fomo when they don’t even have it perfect themselves. I have never once bragged about the good in my relationship that’s my business and I’m not going to add to this toxic cycle

@whadddup Жыл бұрын

Ultimately what matters in a relationship is love. Love, support and happiness is all it is about. We humans strive for that. Even you are lucky for having a partner. Humans also have issues, and are not perfect. Spending should not be a measure of love. It brings happiness for a short while, but it fades away quickly.

@ARS-fn6px 8 ай бұрын

@@whadddupno its not, since men cant love😂

@ARS-fn6px 8 ай бұрын

You need to stop wasting his and your own time and look for a man who can provide. He is not relationship material and if he isnt providing for you he is using you even if he doesnt see it (that way). Walk away , your not a bad person for choosing yourself, men do it ALL the time. Once he gets his money right he will dump you without a care in the world and date who he actually wants to date. The longer you stay the longer it will take to forgive yourself. Stop thinking your better than other women and he wont do it to you. He WILL.

@ekittenxo 8 ай бұрын

You need to tell him how you feel. If you guys can't agree then It may be time to break things off. It's ok to feel resentment it's natural. U can find someone who meets all your needs and more

@jacquelinemarie9655 8 ай бұрын

You sound like me four years ago. I absolutely wrecked a relationship instead of peacefully and gracefully leaving it because I fell into this mindset. You need to find the source of your resentment towards him stat. And in my experience; it’s likely something from your past, like how it was with me and an ex prior to that relationship who financially abused me. Ultimately you get to decide how to approach this but if anything, do it with as much kindness to him and your relationship. If he’s working hard and doing his best with what he has, so be it. You either have to accept him where he is at or gracefully let your relationship go before the resentment turns into toxicity between the two of you. I don’t mean to sound gloomy; I just wish someone had told me what I’m telling you now. I’m wishing you the best; it’s such a sucky feeling and im rooting for you to have as positive an outcome as possible for all involved❤

@Lady_Aradia 11 ай бұрын

That flower part had me in stitches 😂. Girl…yes! Buy the darn vase. It’s like ppl wanting to win the lottery, but won’t buy the ticket 🤣

@azaleaadair9053 5 ай бұрын

I needed to hear the 19-early 20s boyfriend not being able to do luxury stuff. I feel like my expectations were somewhat skewed and at times I expect too much

@tania1078 6 ай бұрын

Maybe since I’m so into “suffering corn” i feel the need to defend it a little lol So, hear me out: For me, suffering corn helps me learn from other women’s experiences with shitty people. They never start acting all mean and insufferable. Sadly, in my own life i wasn’t lucky enough to be “awful people free” and there’s behaviours that are so normalized to me that only when someone points them out i realize that those are wrong. I know it seems evident but believe me when i say that if you’re used to hushing the feeling of being uncomfortable for the sake of “peace” it is really hard to spot those on your own.

@jisunguwu3711 5 ай бұрын

I agree with this to certain extent, consuming this content too much through will negatively impact your view on relationships though, not everyone is out to get you or you have to cautious and analyze a mans every step or interaction. Sometimes its okay to accept love as is and not every relationship will turn out toxic. It can..but what if it doesn’t. You can be cautious, obviously, but you shouldn’t let ur traumatic experiences hold you back from new ones.

@alli_sonc Жыл бұрын

the youtube algorithm for once gave me something i so wanted and needed. you’re brilliant immediate subscribe!

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

happy to have you here bestie ✨

@LuisGutierrez-bz9xn 6 ай бұрын

BESTIE, IM A GAY MAN, BUT THE ALGORITHM WANTED US TOGETHER. caps off

@Spiritfba 7 ай бұрын

Can you make a video about real corn in a relationship? It’s tearing apart my otherwise good marriage, and some of my girlfriends can relate.

@EmL-kg5gn 5 ай бұрын

If he’s watching 🌽 the relationship is over imo. Read up on the research of how it affects men’s brains! After reading that I’d honestly prefer to be cheated on the traditional way than to be with someone who watches that…

@thiacari 5 ай бұрын

Corn is not dangerous per se. But it can be really addictive, and if consumed too much, starts to affect real life. Just like alcohol - if he drinks a few on Saturdays, it's ok. If he's drunk every day, or waiting to get drunk, life will go slowly south. Treat it like any other addiction - get support, it won't change until he wants it to.

@artisticbeautybyhanako6801 5 ай бұрын

@@thiacari um, it is actually, there's no way to vet that youre not watching a victim of trafficking and most big sites are incentivised to keep real abuse posted

@thiacari 5 ай бұрын

@@artisticbeautybyhanako6801 There are some things as "ethical" and "feminist" adult videos, where these issues are addressed. Can OF be seen as corn too?

@artisticbeautybyhanako6801 5 ай бұрын

@@thiacari 'ethical' porn is an oxymoron. At the end of the day, no matter how you dress it up, youre essentially defending male entitlement to womens bodies. Liberation cant happen while bad, misogynist men are being rewarded the catharsis of degrading women, female nudity they dont have to earn or work for encourages conceited entitlement. Theres a reason men flocked to strip clubs after the womens lib of the 60s and its not because they were thinking about how ~empowered~ they are or holding her in admiration, its because they needed a safe space where women were still subservient to their whims🤡

@bollocks42o 5 ай бұрын

I remember years 3-7 of my relationship I was wondering if maybe we weren’t soul mates because it didn’t fit the image I had in my head about what a “great” relationship looked like. Social media definitely played a role, along with the romantic comedies/cartoons we all grew up with. If you’re happy, healthy, and secure in your relationship - you are blessed!

@bollocks42o 5 ай бұрын

Additional info: we have now been together 12 years. After year 7 I decided regardless of what is “perfect” that he was what I wanted. After watching my bestie I realize I naturally stumbled on a generous man.

@melonydivineq 3 ай бұрын

That's so true like the cartoon and novels ...

@melonydivineq 3 ай бұрын

@@bollocks42ocan u elaborate a lil I'll love to know it ..cz I too have been through this phase and my thoughts are kinda influenced by those novels or movies

@bollocks42o 3 ай бұрын

@@melonydivineq sure! for some reason, i thought that romantic love would stay super passionate forever (its easy to fall into a fight/fuck cycle in short relationships AKA extreme passion) but in the long term - we developed more of a platonic love for each other. i thought maybe this meant that he should be a friend to me rather than a lover, but that clenched my gut & heart to consider. we ended up taking “a break” at the 5 year mark and while i did want to fool around with other people during that - it didn’t seem worth it when i considered that i could permanently lose my long term partner over it. in time, i didnt really care what relationship dynamics “should” be like with your SO because realistically everyones relationship SHOULD be different. i cant imagine not having him by my side anymore, and thats true love.

@melonydivineq 3 ай бұрын

@@bollocks42o thanku I appreciate it wish u and ur bf a happy life together 💗

@NA-ht6eh 3 ай бұрын

I had a corn addicted boyfriend and it was awful. I unfortunately had the "I can fix him!" mindset and guess who got virtually cheated on!! It NEEDS to be discussed because it WILL get worse. Men normalize watching it to the point where they see no issue watching it everyday, then it's two times a day, and then it's taking long trips to go to the "bathroom". Then you're stuck dealing with someone who have brought their own demise and given themselves ED and insecurities.

@biancarowena9040 Жыл бұрын

This topic made me think of limerence and how it ruined my life, but learning about it helped me put things in perspective. I love your content, thank you for making us think, and for helping us reshape our thoughts about our worth ❤️

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

thank you for sharing bestie ✨ i appreciate you 🫶🏽

@777goddess Жыл бұрын

My way of avoiding the consumption of negative/useless media is literally reminding myself that what goes in will come out . Like if you engage in negative content you’ll eventually become a negative person righttt??

@milica730 Жыл бұрын

Please, never stop posting, I love your perspective. Found you yesterday and binge watched everything😍 You are doing this like a true professional with 1 mil subscribers. Keep going luv yaa

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

thank you bestie i appreciate you 🥹🥹

@bellama920 3 ай бұрын

I remember when I switched from hating relationship 🌽 to craving it desperately. When I went from rolling eyes at the toxicity and abuse riddled in romance novels to swooning over it. It was a 5 year old relationship, but he had fallen so far and he had lost so many of his excellent qualities for so long. That was when I started to realize that his time was up. Ive been single for 2 years now and no longer feel any draw to relationship 🌽. I got a cat and realized how my furry little critter met far more of my emotional needs than anyone Ive dated. I dont think Ill be active in the dating market for a while lol

@om-nj2hw 3 ай бұрын

Cats are the best! Better than most relationships. Being able to pay your own way and having your furry friend waiting for you at home is a good life. People are drama.

@michellebarnstable3835 Ай бұрын

My husband and I were best friends since we were 16. He was always different from our other guy friends, he was respectful and interacted with women like full humans, not objects with a purpose. We started dating in our mid 20s and the way he knows me and is so dedicated to our happineess and comfort. My ring was less than $500, but it was perfect for me. A pearl carved into a skull by the artist who grows them. His overbearing mother hated it when he showed her first! But he never lets her interfere with our relationship, and that's not a line I ever have to draw. My husband and I both struggle with PTSD, but whenever he struggles Im always so proud to see how he overcomes and works for our peace in life together.

@norak8080 7 ай бұрын

I actually came into the video with a very different perspective. I'm freshly broken up and I consume feelgood relationship content all the time - for me, your channel serves that purpose as well. what I mean by that is that I really need to see that I can expect certain things out of a relationship and I never need to settle. good relationships, good men are out there. of course, when I watched the video further I agreed with your point that you shouldn't have unrealistic standards. but believe it or not, up until very recently, I thought that standards like he should provide for me, he should treat me like a princess, he should propose in a romantic way etc. were unrealistic standards. what I'm trying to say is, it's very healthy for me to consume aspirational relationship content right now. but I will use my discernment to tell this from the out of touch content.

@bubbasparks5465 Жыл бұрын

“Can we not” LMFAOOO I love you so much

@couronnedefleurs 8 ай бұрын

GIRL, I opened up IG when I paused this video for a bit. First thing that comes up is this couple made up by an influencer and a musician, both whitexicans; that's what we call privileged kids in Mexico, has to do with the disparity in opportunities related to skin color in this country. Spaniards took a lot of my country's wealth so people who come from those families have it easier than most of us. And well this couple was putting up their first xmas tree in their amazing apartment in Monterrey, and I was starting to get sad, because my bf and I won't be able to put up our first Xmas tree this year yet, and we've lived together for 3 years now! But then this lesson came to mind, like hahaha I'm still in the middle of it and it's already useful! Now I'm in my discernment! I can see the privilege these kids have that neither my bf or I have, and I know we are doing our very best with what we have. So no more sadness or bitterness about it! Next year we'll make it a goal and we'll achieve it! Thank you Elle! I've been binging on your content for some weeks now and it's all soooo GOOD

@Zuzzamma 7 ай бұрын

17:24 omg that was me yesterday . So I was on that dateing process and giving hints on wanting to be given flowers, but I did'nt have the vase. And so when I got these roses, I had to put them into a jar... yikes.

@itskylanotkayla Жыл бұрын

This conversation was very needed!

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

yessss thank you bestie

@carolinadvf97 Жыл бұрын

Omg this video is pure GOLD i love when u upload 💓 Can you please do a video explaining jealousy between women, and the catty behavior when fighting for a men? I would love to hear your perspective and tips on that.

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

thank bestie. noted 🫶🏽

@bernadetak3991 7 ай бұрын

I really love your videos, some of the things you say saved me from a desperate cool girl future. I simply chose to respect myself. And literally most of the things you say are so true! Yesterday I begged my dad to get something for my mum for 6th December, and she was really happy, and extremely surprised.

@indrinita 8 ай бұрын

This probably had to be my favourite video of yours so far!

@joogutierrez4172 Жыл бұрын

Thank you SO SO SO much for this video❤

@helenasoldevilla8208 7 ай бұрын

THIS VIDEO IS SOOO IMPORTANT!!!

@krystinehamre7851 11 ай бұрын

You are my good vibes content. I do look at comments when I see controversial posts just to feel the rage 😂 thank you for this reminder 🙏

@kosmopolitanna Жыл бұрын

Love everything you talk about and the way you do it ❤

@victorialopezguerrero388 10 ай бұрын

you make this world a better place

@googi2003 Жыл бұрын

Wow! Could not have said it better. THANK YOUUUUU SOOOOOOO MUCH!!

@evmmorales4764 6 ай бұрын

The narration, the introduction and the music for the beginning of the video: chef kiss 👩🏻‍🍳💗

@SimplyRuth222 8 ай бұрын

I just discovered your channel yesterday and have been binge watching since, I love it here! Thank you thank you thank youuuu 🤎

@quynhao8437 Жыл бұрын

Not a single thing missed! You go, bestie 💖

@jns3584 Жыл бұрын

Preach girl!! Finally another creator I align with ❤️ Thank your for your videos

@UrFaveMF Жыл бұрын

Your voice 🙌✨💖. I could listen to you monologue all day.

@cnoor30 6 ай бұрын

Bestie I’ve been following you since you came to KZfaq and gave me the support to drastically improve my life Watching these clips at the beginning of this video now I’m just breaking down in floods of tears I think it’s a sign of how far I’ve come Thanks Bestie ❤

@sincerelyels Жыл бұрын

Girlll second video I’m watching from you and I can tell already you’ll go far. Looooove looove loooove your content, you’re spilling all the facts ( the 1st video I watched was on pick me girls and that was the first time I realised I was one too, slowly working on changing myself now )👏👏👏👏

@7Mushrooms7 Жыл бұрын

I found your channel recently and love your realistic and balanced views on relationships and hypergamy. You've become one of my favorites.

@annabourbon 4 ай бұрын

This is such an eye opening video for me especially because I feel like I've been saying a lot if things that are not in alignment with who I really am and what I want of life. ❤😮 I think the idea of posting content that really makes me feel happy about it on my own social media is just: gorgeous. Like it's already getting me in that mood/vibe specifically. Thank you so much for this insight!!! 😭🥂

@samanthareidyy 5 ай бұрын

The vase tangent 💀💀

@HairByReneeLLC 5 ай бұрын

Can we just celebrate that your middle/nuanced content showed up for us? 😍❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ I’m SO glad someone’s talking about how not everything is simple black and white and that nuances not only exist, understanding nuances helps us navigate 99% of our human experience and existence! 💖💖💖

@krystinehamre7851 11 ай бұрын

14:02 bell your so intelligent! You truly blow my mind in every video.

@Slowly_surely 11 ай бұрын

I LOVE YOUR CONTENT SO MUCH 😍

@usisiphoqamata Жыл бұрын

1:23 totally snapped me back to reality.

@usisiphoqamata Жыл бұрын

Wait, this whole video snapped me back to reality! Love love your content.

@waqu8403 7 ай бұрын

Thank you for opening my eyes

@cauliflowerhead2735 Жыл бұрын

This video has come to my life at the right time. Thank you so much, Elle!

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

thank you bestie 🫶🏽

@riledmouse4677 Жыл бұрын

Your videos really help me.

@DesertShadowWarriorQueen 7 ай бұрын

Excellent video thank you ❤

@MyraMabry 8 ай бұрын

This is the kind of tough love I need in my life

@uef0h Жыл бұрын

girl i am so lucky and thankful that i found ur channel, it is EVERYTHING

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

noted bestie ✨ thank you

@sharkizinhanha3317 Жыл бұрын

Love this so much!! 💞 Just found soft life content a few months ago & you’re so inspirational!! P.S. Your teeth look amazing!! 💓💓

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

you bless me, bestie ✨

@miomiomio56 5 ай бұрын

Estelle you are out here doing God's work for girls like me who has been in this self-loathing cycle... that wasn't even caused by me it was caused by someone who abused and mistreated me and their voice became my voice in my head. I only recently got rid of this voice but I am still struggling and your videos have been so validating and helpful. Thank you so much for letting me be a spoiled girlie

@Thats_Sew_Shy 9 ай бұрын

Girl I fricken love your channel lol❤

@nizia8059 7 ай бұрын

Sorry bestie but the subtitles seem smaller than usual, I use them cuz English is like a second or third language. But great video as always, feels good recognising that wanting to be spoiled and feel actual love isn’t an absurd requirement and that we shouldn’t settle for those who won’t give the love, we just have to search a little longer.

@andreagardner9819 8 ай бұрын

needed this

@Speakyourmindgirly Жыл бұрын

Thank you for this video!

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

thank you bestie 🙏🏽

@babyprincess888 Жыл бұрын

I needed this

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

@asmaasmi7815 Жыл бұрын

Thanks gurl for your content 🥰 please size up the size of your subtitles, english is not my first language thanksssssss

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

💅🏽💅🏽✨

@danidiaz2377 5 ай бұрын

My god so eye opening

@mysticalmunchiesllc5574 Жыл бұрын

Thank you . 🙏🏼

@kosmopolitanna Жыл бұрын

Love from Poland! 🇵🇱 🎉❤

@Cerrah311 11 ай бұрын

@14:14 yes ma’am. Active Listening Required

@shancxkai 9 ай бұрын

Heya ✨Elle✨~~~ you're great

@jadiennehoang Жыл бұрын

u saved me😩

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

🥹🥹🥹 bestie wake up 😭

@vidaajoon1881 Жыл бұрын

The guy receiving the lasagna...girl, you can do so much better! Telling myself too

@BigChonies 7 ай бұрын

“Even a mason jar” 😂😂😂❤❤❤ aahhh i like you. You get it!!!

@inoscent Жыл бұрын

ily bestie i NEEDED this especially during the summer

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

🥺🥺 I'm rooting for you bestie

@LuisGutierrez-bz9xn 6 ай бұрын

ALWAYS BE IN DISCERNMENT BESTIES

@KarinaLicursi Ай бұрын

People forget that over-the-top gestures can be lovebombing. This is why a lot of people don't like Benny Blanco for Selena Gomez. I find it's the quiet men who are the best, the ones who need to brag are usually just wolves in sheep's clothing.

@sassysledgehammer 8 ай бұрын

You have such an interesting channel. I’ve been very much a 50/50 person. I believe in continuing to push women to have a choice. Women aren’t a thing. And I fear continuing to push the narrative of gold digger makes us seem like an object. But I sometimes wonder if this is in fact our secret to dominating as queens: total freedom. Men hustle, women thrive. I just wish both genders can find their own definition of 50/50 that works best for them.

@callme_xe 11 ай бұрын

I'll never understand the flower thing, I mean, they're... Flowers. Just flowers. They're gonna die like... in three days? It's sad. At least for me. Idk.

@callme_xe 8 ай бұрын

@@ElizabethUkeh true

@JL-eq1uf Жыл бұрын

Preach!

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

🙏🏽

@littlelizzymamaliz 10 ай бұрын

I love you I love you I love you

@katec9893 6 ай бұрын

Wow I've never heard it called this before. I was following women on Instagram who work in my target field and was struggling with seeing them do posts about their handsome perfect husbands, kids and houses. I'm single and it made me feel so bad about myself and annoyed since I was following for career goals, not to see people boast. I had to unfollow anyone who posts this kind of thing for my mental health. I feel like the next generation will hopefully cringe at all those posts and value humility and privacy much more in future.

@femininerenaissance Жыл бұрын

bestiiiiiiie

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

hey bestie ✨

@arthurkiklarndisthebest5663 6 ай бұрын

Hello besties, could you advise me? My boyfriend is very attentive when giving me gifts and calling me cute nicknames, but lately I feel like he makes fun of me a lot, in addition to "joking" he told me that I looked like a pig, the worst thing? He knows that I don't have a good relationship with my food and among other things, besides that I feel that one day he loves me a lot and another day he ignores me, I should break up with him, right?

@thiacari 5 ай бұрын

What??? He might be going through some phase. Guys are always trying boundaries. Set your boundaries very clearly - that some jokes make you feel bad, even for days, and create anxiety and bad health choices. For him it might be nothing, but for you, in the long run it creates the opposite of happiness, confidence and health. He has to stop, even though he might enjoy the jokes - he can not jeopardize your well-being. Every time he does it, tell this, leave the room or the house. And if he continues to do it, one day, don't come back.

@Laura-bq4uu 5 ай бұрын

Use your discernment You know what the solution is way better than what a stranger would infer over the internet You have the strength to make a tough choice, you just need to use your discernment Best of luck bestie!!

@om-nj2hw 3 ай бұрын

He calls you a pig!?! Get yourself right first, step into your own power, be how you want to be...focus only on that, then no one can shake you.

@jennabeanz Жыл бұрын

Brb let me get my discernment tattoo

@marinel.9216 Жыл бұрын

9:50

@777goddess Жыл бұрын

15:00 my 16yo self knowing this and still having these standards for my 17yo bf💀💀😭🧿

@frizkiaputri1079 7 ай бұрын

first of all, Eww.. second of all super Eww to that man in the opening. Oh girl... he stays because u keep feeding him, like a dog

@jessicaribeiro8928 Жыл бұрын

The first reaction when their bf gives a gift it's to film a tiktok video lol ITS NOT REAL

@therealmanifestelle Жыл бұрын

for real💅🏽

@EarCandyAsmr Жыл бұрын

I don’t want to be that person because I love the idea of relationship corn, I love flowers and gifts and dates - but the instagram girlies who post the most items are likely getting cheated on (not all of them and I’m not being negative I’m speaking on knowing a few of them personally) that does not mean you should settle for someone who does know speak your love language .. it just means to stop the instant gratification of wanting people to think we are loved based on gifts - and suffering corn is the worst, nobody feels bad for them they just think you are dumb for putting up with it 🥲

@user-pz3et9yb1f Жыл бұрын

The only time my cheating ex of 6 years ever purchased me anything was on my birthday and it was a single flower from 7 eleven, and I think it was because he felt guilty for once for cheating it wasnt even about my birthday