Son of a motherless goat was my favorite. His delivery is fantastic, he could read the phone book and it would be funny.

My grandma used to say "my cow." If she was really upset, she would say "My cattle and sheep!"

Brings to mind two things. My brother, when a teenager, would say to someone who had offended him, "Go grind your teeth on the curb." That usually ended the discussion. My nephew, my brother's son, when he was four years old, would always correct anyone who said "holy cow," saying, "No, just cow. Only God is holy."

Son of a baptist preacher

"Hey yo mama made crud muffins, come on in! I love mama's crud muffins!"

i've gotten people at work to start saying "Oh, Pickles!"

One of the best comedians of all tie and he's a christian too :) Tim Hawkins never gets old!

Where's Cottonheaded Ninimuggins??!

HAHAHAHA!!!! So funny! My favorite was Saint Jack. Tim hawkins, you were that kept me going when my grandma was in the hospital dying. She passed away May 28 2014, the worst day of my life. But it was you who kept me going. THANK YOU TIM HAWKINS!! KEEP IT UP!!!

He reminds me of Robin Williams here.

He forgot Duck Dynasty's "Oh good night".

I have actually used Son of a Motherless Goat. I got the strangest looks when I yelled it out in class o-o

What the House of Representatives sounds like during a debate . . .

“Son of a motherless goat” *everyone dies of laughter, including Tim* “that’s not even possible” XD

A co-worker once said "Mother-father sister-brother". I laughed for days!!

I don't know how many times I've watched this by now, and it's still just as hilarious.

Who else started crying in the 'crud muffin' bit?

My friend and I use "son of a baptist preacher" and "son of a motherless goat" all the time 😂😂😂

FART KNOCKER!!! It's my favorite one

sad thing is, I've used all of them.

Some kids from my Church brought me hear and now I am going to watch more of his videos 😂😂

Just seen him Saturday in Woodbridge VA, Oh my goodness he was funny. People were laughing so hard they were crying. I laughed so hard had a headache the next day. It was really nice to see clean humor!

Son of a two timing rainbow or my personal favorite: Sportacus!

This made me laugh so hard! I had a hamster when I was a little girl. My dad became quite attached to the little guy. I don't remember what his real name was, but I do remember that my dad always called him "fart knocker". Thank you for digging that old memory out and brushing the dust off. :)

"son of a motherless goat" is a line from the movie 'the three amigos' with chevy chase, steve martin and martin short. my siblings and i used to say that all the time we thought it was hilarious.

My son asked me the other day what a "fart knocker" was after I called him that. Now I have a better explanation. LOL

Tim Hawkins is one of the best funny guy ever this made me laugh

Benedict Cumberbatch.

He missed "God...bless America"

fart knocker😂😂

My favorite part was when he started laughing at 3:18 when he said "Shut your pie-hole."

My son says "cheese n rice" when he's mad instead of "Jesus Christ". 😕

I have a GREAT ONE for you that my Grandpa used to say "GOT DANDRUFF, SOME OF IT ITCHES!!!"

*stubs toe* "PAT SAJAK*

Son of a motherless goat XD

When I cuss (usually by accident), I change it up a bit 1. Son of a Biscuit! 2. What the Fudge?! 3. Crap 4. Fudge 5. Freakin' 6. Hades (instead of Hell) 7. Good Lord And so forth... What is sad is that I know more curse words than my younger sisters, yet not once have I used them as casually as they do. 😟I mean I could, but let not foul language come forth from your mouth (sorta like that; from the book of James somewhere)

I don't understand why people cant just enjoy what he is putting out for the public to ENJOY, if people don't like his videos then you really shouldn't watch them.

I tried two of the Christian cuss words on my girlfriend and her fiancé. She scared me on accident and I said " Great Caesar"s Ghost Ashley!" She cracked up laughing. Later her fiancé scared me and I said " Son Of A Motherless Goat!" That really startled him and he said " Whoa Whoa!"

im christian but i do say cuss words so this is funny to me

part of the fun of this is watching my brother dying each time we watch this

Here's another few for ya'll, not sure if it was on the list: "poo on a stick" "fart nugget" "river stonker" "shwat" just some I use haha

Um, Where is Holy Shiitake Mushrooms?

My grandfather used to say "Holy hen up a tree!". Here are some others I know. Be sure you get a good breath for the last one: Son of a banshee! Swish and flicker! Dragon bogeys! Unicorn turds! Darby's sock! Voldemort's nipple! Cauldron bum! Leprechaun taint! Jiggery pokery! Craters! Blasters! What in the name of anti-gravity?! What in the galaxy?! Great galaxies! Great guns! Holy pulsars! Holy heat rays of Trixas 5! Holy nova! Sweet mother of Venus! Sweet mother of Mercury! Hot rockets! Great moons of Neptune! Oh, shiitake mushrooms! Frack! Frack you! Frack it! What the frack?! Scrap! Scrud! Slag! Frag! Frag it! Frag you! What the frag?! Glitch! Son of a glitch! Piston breath! Gasket breath! Glitch head! Bull scrap! Bull slag! Horse slag! Ball bearings! Aft! Afthole! Pain in the aft! Pain in the exhaust port! Pain in the rear bumper! Oh, my Primus! Dear mother of Primus! For the love of Primus! For Primus' sake! Good Primus! Primus curse it! By Primus! By the Matrix! By the Pit! What the pits?! Pits! Pits, no! Motherboard fragger! Mother fragger! Up your aft! Up your afterburner! Up your tail pipe! Up your exhaust port! Blow it out your exhaust port! Blow it out your aft! Blow it out your afterburner! Blow it out your tail pipe! Leakin' lubricant! Sweet Solus Prime! What in the name of the Primes?! By the Primes! How in the name of Megatron's pistons?! By the All-Spark! Good fragging Primus! Harri H. Krishna! (or however you spell it.) Jinkies! Zoinks! Whillikers! Gee whizzikers! Wowee-wow-wow! Ru-roh! Ripes! Rikes! Swine puppies! Crud puppies! Fudge puppies! Fudgies! Holy cricket! Bummer! Bummer city drag! Bummer Joe the Third! For crying in a bucket of mud! Holy catfish! Holy shanghai! Gollers! Gollers, Meltman! Rats and snails and puppy dog tails! Un-dirty wording-believable! Mule muffins! Bull muffins! Horse muffins! Meadow muffins! Asciugamani! Questa macchina non funziona bene! Your mother is a *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* ing *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* Laura Epson *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* agmintenvenium *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* tragulla *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* hippopotamus *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* Republican *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* and Daniel Radcliffe *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* with a bucket of *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* in a castle far away where no one can hear you *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* soup *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* with a bucket of *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* Mickey Mouse *beep* *beep* *beep* and a stick of dynamite *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* magical *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* ALAKAZAM!

sugar honey ice tea

Rakka frakka tootpallutin... Reminds me of Yosemite Sam. Also, "kaka" is just the "s" word in another language.

Christian cuss words. Son of a motherless goat!

my mom says crapolla a lot XD i have heard a few of these and this is so funny.. my favorite is son of a motherless goat

His comedic timing is the best, ❤ 😂😂great voices, love the different accents

Tim...this is the FUNNIEST thing I have EVER seen from you!!! I was laughing SO HARD through this whole video!!! God Bless you Tim! (You son of a motherless goat!) HAHAHAHAHA!!!

"For Pete's sake." "For the love of Pete" "Jeez Pete." Wait...who's Pete?

i thought I was the only one who said son of a biscuit!

Son of a motherless goat!!!! my fav

I couldn't stop laughing when he said fart knocker! lol

i just use the name of a local business I kept hearing on radio ads growing up: Fracalossi Chevrolet

HOLY CRUD MUFFIN! I'VE GOT TO MEMORIZE THESE!!!

okay I have to say, "fart knocker" was my personal favorite!

My favorite is one kids at the Christian school I went to came up with: "Cheese and Rice!"

I saw both Tim and Bob Smiley last night and they were hilarious! Tim is even funnier in person lol! :-)

Son of a motherless goat!! Where's your mother? I don't knoowwww! Lol

I use "Son of a flying goatfart!"

I am laughing so hard right now !

HAHAHAHAHA. I like the CRUD MUFFIN. alsoooo..... WHAT THE JEFF WITH A CRUD MUFFIN

Nine years later and I find myself unironically saying SON OF A MOTHERLESS GOAT.

another one is "what the cheesecake?"

JUMPING JUNE BUGS OF GOSH GOLLY

My mom came up with one. Sweet Baby Buddha. At our house its Oh my Buddha. or Good Buddha. I say Oh my Lanta a lot. but Motherless Goat and Fartknocker are becoming popular now.

Son of a motherless goat is from Three Amigos with Steve Martin lol

This is a better version of a video I seen recently. FART KNOCKER!

Haha! And all these years I thought I was the one that made up "crud muffins" lol

I like : oh MUSTARD!!!!

son of a motherless goat you are awesome tim hawkins

I love his expressions XD

My mom wanted me to get out of the habit of saying “frick” because it was too close to the other cuss word, so I started saying “flip” and she STILL was like “No, it’s too similar to the cuss word” like the flip?

Son of a motherless goat!! I can't breathe!!

I favor "crudbuckets," myself.

i hope everyelse enjoys son of a motherless goat as much as me

What the Bob barker!!!

Shut The Front Door!!! haha....TUURRD.....love these! so funy and true

These are funny ideas ppl had but what really tops it off is HOW he reads it XD It just makes it better

"It was over 10000" *no.* *it was OVER 9000*

The companion to George Carlin's famous routine. ... You know the one I'm talking about.

Every time I watch him, he gets funnnier!

This has to be my favorite Tim Hawkins video

These funny words bring a lighthearted air to what could be a destructive moment. Sense of humor...I believe I've seen God's sense of humor in life. Burps... farts.. Gleeks...etc. He is very fun and wants us to remain childlike. Not terse or bitter. 💜🎶💙🎶💛🎶❤

He missed one of my favorites...Wack-Bag!!!! Hahaha had me dying!!! Turd. Hehe 😆😋😏

7 words - the clean version..I hope. LMAO! This is awesome!

I remember, "shut your pie hole," from Disney's "Recess." The old lady teacher said it to the parents. The parents laughed, then she said, "What part of 'shut your pie holes' don't you understand?"

I use crud all the time when I'm upset 😂😂

three amigos reference for the win

One of my favorites that I learned at my Christian college....PeePee DooDoo Dadburn Butt. Stuck with me still 46 years later!

Thank you for having great seats....and a steady hand. :-)

I have been known to break out "Mother Hubbard!" every once and a while.

My family and I are big fans of Downton Abbey, so we say, "My Lord and Lady Grantham". If you watch DA, you'll get it.

I personally use "flyin fiddlers feather" and "well diggidy " kinda helps come back to normal because I always think about what I said and it gives me chuckle.

Just as funny as the video is the guy recording it with his kids listening and laughing along with him 😂

My favorite was “son of a motherless goat!” 😆 I have one! “Son of a biscuit eating bulldog” is one I use ALL THE TIME

I liked "bullshik, oh, that was close..." 😂

There's this kid in my 4th period class who was running late and said " oh gosh Gilly" and ran to the class and I just laughed and he turned around and said what and then turned back around and went in the classroom

Im a christian this is the best thing ever

I'm going to use fart knocker