Wow!

Thank you! I used to work as a notetaker; it was one of my most favorite jobs ☺️

@@trustyourself-ashleyching3646 how could I possibly get a copy of that? What a gift you have!

Thank you so much!

I am 6, but I would describe myself as an idealistic person, rather than pragmatic. Why can't "idealistic/pragmatic/relational" be a separate parameter, similar to instinctual stacking?

kzfaq.info/get/bejne/iNqWo8JhkpnMmYU.html have you seen this talk? I saw this comment and thought about it. Really amazing job. I am balanced wings and I would tell you to rely on the soft 8 as it seems you do. Which is say when you get angry: "I don't blame anyone, I am just angry right now, and saying it made me calm." The moment you say you're angry, it will all fade away and you'll be clearheaded. Then when calm and quiet say "I love you, and felt my personal justice crossed by this triggering anger, is there a way we can fix this?" If this sounds weirdly phrased, well it's the best I got lol. Good luck :D :D Perfectionism I go "Would this be ok if someone I cared about did? And then troubleshoot: If unacceptable, ask for help, If acceptable then self- advocate." and then go "No matter what you do, I love you. Because you're just a person too. and this isn't helping anyone."

it's interesting to me to learn abt the different types because ive had the same situation as you when i was younger but as a more assertive type (a 7) i would always fight back in those situations and point out what i thought was unfair loud and clear! its also interesting to hear your perspective as a 9w1 because i love 9's, and my best friend is a 9w1 too.

Glad it was helpful! Thanks.

Definitely some truth to that I'm a bit miserable because of the way my toxic mother raised me so I'm working to correct that

Many thanks!

That's so true! Kids really do have their own personalities from the get-go.

Thank you! 😃

heyy Im also INFJ-T 4W5 lol, what does melancholy mean? is it another personality system?

@@annayra6458 Ayyy I'm also INFJ-T 4w5 melancholic! They're referring to the four Greek temperaments: sanguine, melancholic, phlegmatic, & choleric. I believe they meant melancholic, not melancholy, but same thing basically ;P

@@abbigailpandl1052 thank you very much!

Im INFJ, 1w9 but when im stressed, i become 4w5. 🥳

Type 9: idealist/romanticist vs Type 4: realist/romanticist Ideal normalcy vs Ideal deep originality 9 = Live inside of fantasy to find an ideal world when the real one is painful. The apex of type 9 is that they can enjoy just being normal, just existing and slowing down. Most of the other enneagram types don't want to chill, they feel a strong desire to achieve something ( not want to, they HAVE to otherwise they feel uneasy ). 9s just generally don't want to do much until they do. At best, bringing the sense of "being normal and chilling is ok" into the world, when normal just enjoying the little good things and disliking the mildly bad, and at most unhealthy, delusional/non-responsive and broken while being extremely angry in a repressed way. - Core fear: What if something I do causes everything I love to be taken away from me? What if my anger ( that I don't keep in touch with because it hurts others and therefore, my comfort ) causes my family and friends to not give me friendship and love I need? What if I can't pay my rent and then I die? If I have to take sides I feel like I am literally dying, I can see the good of both sides so I can't choose. >> What if being myself makes other people uncomfortable / what if being myself makes other people hate me? Can't do that! I don't need anything. I'm not mad, I just need my good place and it will all work out :) ( Delusion ) - 4 = Always searching for that ideal world in the real world sometimes in impossible ways to alleviate the pain of feeling outcasted / want more in their life. Type 4 can see so far inside of themselves that they can make bold choices and generally have better boundaries and qualifications better then type 9 can. - Core fear: What if nobody ever finds out who I am? What if I never find out who I am? What if my shame is right and I am worthless? What if everyone/ thing that spited me was right, what if the potential envy I am holding onto will never be fulfilled? What if nobody ever understands my feelings and I am alone in the world. What if I really *am* normal. Then what would that mean for my pain, what would that mean for my passion? - What if I was meaningless to the world, what if I never mattered to anybody. What if when I take off the masks there really is nothing underneath? ( Delusion ) Type 4 is especially important because they are always seeking more, to have what others have, to be a someone special, someone important in the world. And all type 4 people are important in the world regardless due to birthright, but want to find internally and externally show themselves ( who! they! are! ) to the world. When a type 4 really gets going they can create some crazy deep and awesome stuff. - The type 4's struggle is often to hate feeling normal. The type 9s struggle is often to hate feeling pulled on, they just want to be unbothered and maintain inner ok-ness. Advice for 4 from type 9: Learn to let go of everything, Learn you don't have to hold onto bad things. It is OK to treat yourself normally as you would any other person, and you will still be loved. Advice for 9 from type 4:: Learn who you are and strive to be that person, Learn it's ok to be sad and process emotions. It is OK to treat yourself normally as you would any other person, and you will still be loved. - I learned how to be introspective from a 4 friend and they sit with me in the darkest feelings I have and understood with me. I love type 4. I love all enneagram types though. I think most people can have feelings and problems from every part of the enneagram. I'm 9 but I have a lot of type 4 and 5 issues, but also big events in life and people you meet will generally change what problems you have to take on. Sometimes at work I feel 3 compulsions. Sometimes when I feel like nobody gets me because of my autism miscommunications, I feel 4 compulsions. The enneagram is just a fluid map of human- ness with your enneagram number at the starting point, the entry square on the boardgame of life. As people grow they'll get closer to understanding all types anyways, while still being their own. I sure typed out a lot, I hope it was able to answer your question well enough. Other replies welcome of course. (!!! yes! ) Here's a tri-type chart as well, because there is a theory that your gut, heart , and mind all operate on a type in that category : www.pinterest.com/pin/508625351645787037/

Check out subtypes. 9 sx is quite similar to 4.

wtf this is hilarious seeing that your comment is at the bottom lol

@@ibanezmonsterg lmao

epic

I am a 7 and affected by my father, hell even the childhood experiences of 8 is about their abusive father and how they stood up to them

Yes !!! But no one believes me and they’ll call you a cynic.

I actually believe in people, and the thing that makes me feel like i have worth is through my ability to love others. but you have to love yourself first. i wouldnt ask someone to sacrifice themselves for me.