The Dark Side of Your Emotional Needs: Attention

Рет қаралды 43,235

Күн бұрын

Why do otherwise rational human beings do crazy things?
This is the first part of a series I'll be publishing over the coming months on the dark side of human emotional needs. Throughout the series I'll seek to answer the question I posed above, and in this first video I'll give you an idea of how a thwarted need for attention can ruin lives.
Video highlights include:
0:00 Introduction
3:07 A reminder of the basic, primal emotional needs we all (to varying degrees) have
5:04 The 'all your eggs in one basket trap'
8:26 Different 'types' of attention
12:10 How to be an effective human being
17:45 The cult of Jim Jones and 'gross psychology'
20:02 Are you immune to 'love bombing'?
24:16 Summary
The second video in this series, on the dark side of your emotional need for security, can be watched here:
▶︎ • The Dark Side of Your ...
If you found this video helpful then please leave comment and hit the 'like' button - and don't forget to subscribe and tap the notification bell for updates on the rest of this series and my other videos.
Read more on the Primal Human Needs here:
▶︎www.hypnosisdownloads.com/blo...
All references can be found here:
▶︎www.unk.com/blog/the-dark-sid...
Sign up for Mark's weekly Clear Thinking newsletter for tips like this sent straight to your inbox:
▶︎www.unk.com/blog/free-therapy...
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++About Mark Tyrrell++
Psychology is my passion. I've been a psychotherapist trainer since 1998, specializing in brief, solution focused approaches. I now teach practitioners all over the world via our online courses.
More about Mark:
▶︎www.unk.com/blog/about-mark-t...
++Social channels++
Facebook (practitioners):
▶︎ / uncommonpractitioners
Facebook (self help):
▶︎ / uncommonknowledge
Instagram:
▶︎ / marktyrrellunk
Twitter:
▶︎ / marktyrrell

Пікірлер: 65

@ashirwadjoshi9667 4 жыл бұрын

You are too good when it comes to making someone understand about all the concepts to minute level. Keep up the great work Mark. Cheers!

@jamesathens 4 жыл бұрын

This video makes me wish even more that psychotherapists turned to Human Givens Psychology. Such a great presenter, an example of a scientist, and a great motivator for all therapists to get past psychobabble and reach the real root of human suffering. Excellent presentation and truly informative content as always. Thank you so much.

@cherylm5002 3 жыл бұрын

Great video, as a survivor of childhood abuse, I ended up drinking gasoline, skill recovering from the trauma over trauma over trauma, thanks for your insights

@etrebelle9812 3 жыл бұрын

Therapy would be of actual use, if all therapists were at this level and not unfunny clowns. Thank you for such quality; it is such a pleasure to see. p.s. I know that you are right because I went through these ''cult people'' experiences myself, and they are dangerous. If I didn't have my aunt to support me through the aftermath with kind encouraging words and knowing she is a genuine person, I could have made terrible decisions out of sharp pain.

@derickdowney6992 4 жыл бұрын

Absolutely amazing and eye-opening. Thank you for all you do Mark!!!

@cheche9528 3 жыл бұрын

Vulnerable people vulnerable to their own emotional drive ! Focus on meet emotional needs, depending on the Single source, single person, eggs 🥚 in one basket 🧺! Open for easily been manipulated! Fear of abandonment,… “ knowledge is real power “ , shelf knowledge isn’t easy! true… video like this , helped me to leave lot of toxic ex behind who only interested manipulation and controlling me!

@dimitrypeters16 3 жыл бұрын

this is pure gold. i have begun to differentiate people into two kinds. but i could never name the difference. now i can. those who do not need attention and those who do. you can see which is which pretty quickly. thank you very much for the comprehensive and well articulate vlog.

@boglarkatekenos4827 2 жыл бұрын

I needed to hear this today! Thank you for placing me back to a state of humility by reminding me why I am on the journey of a healer!

@BioHacking88 2 жыл бұрын

Eye Opener ! Thank You for doing this !

@shirleykaye4344 4 жыл бұрын

This video explains a lot about how I have been trapped by certain men. As an only child, I received a great deal of attention from my parents as there was no competition for their focus. I'm curious to find out if being an only child predisposes a person to fall victim to others because they are trying to obtain the amount of attention that they received from their parents.

@Benjafish2008 3 жыл бұрын

Rephrase: "I have ALLOWED myself to be trapped by certain men."

@jonathonray6198 2 жыл бұрын

One possibility is that the only child absorbs the negative processes coming from the parents attention as well. So in one sense that kind of attention while they feel it’s helping them, it’s not. It’s like drinking coke, or coffee to satisfy thirst. You can be hooked on attention but not the right kind. It’s a negative seduction. Attachment with parents ideally leaves to trust and joy in other relationships too. So it’s like being trapped in loyalty to the mafia.

@emotionalwisdomtools2617 3 жыл бұрын

Great information! Thanks!

@jett888 4 жыл бұрын

Thsnk you! I'm sharing this on my community page.❤

@jennifercarleton7550 3 жыл бұрын

This series is genius! thank you so much :)

@Tripl3333 4 жыл бұрын

Damn....I mean I've watched quite a lot of your videos and they are like spot on..! for me. I really hope this helps the people in need out there. really thank you for your devotion and seriousness.

@lucjamaria 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you for sharing your knowledge. Fantastic!

@thecraftywitch510 Жыл бұрын

Fantastic analogy. Great subject matter. Thanks Mark.

@halah.2073 Жыл бұрын

Wow, this was so insightful. Thank you. I can't wait to listen to the one about safety and security.

@gekiryudojo Жыл бұрын

Very thought provoking and fascinating video.

@daisybee2138 Жыл бұрын

Thank you for the knowledge xx.

@beeyourselfcounselling6748 3 жыл бұрын

Great oil/water story - I'll be using it in sessions!! Thanks :)

@sarahgilani2201 3 жыл бұрын

Just 1:39 minutes into the video and it is already starting to make so much sense!!!!

@curtismurray9793 4 жыл бұрын

Great info once again Mark I like your comment that a good Psychologist is one who sees underneath the attention seeking behaviour

@stardavies6202 6 ай бұрын

Thank You Mark I Totally agree with you sadly it is all true due to all the programming & conditioning & traumas we have have been through I do not think many people are them "real" selves and most of us are "acting" many roles, including me, but am working on it!!! You are a Great teacher Bless you for sharing your info with everyone Stay Blessed

@user-dg8du2ep4s 3 ай бұрын

This is mind opening!

@meenakshisinghal5399 4 жыл бұрын

Dr your cross sectional view was amazing and enlightening. Thanks

@freefall1536 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you this was truly helpful

@AngelBien 3 жыл бұрын

VERY, VERY, VERY useful.

@rahulshastri9278 5 ай бұрын

Extreamly valuable content

@aura7153 3 жыл бұрын

Please more episodes in this series !

@normanspurgeon5324 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you - very helpful-

@indoororchidsandtropicals358 3 жыл бұрын

Is the need to be needed what drives, for example, women who think they can "fix" a "damaged" man?

@DoctorFatman 3 жыл бұрын

10:48 So that's why everyone was looking at me weird… Jokes aside, as a person with health issues, I love your channel!

@temsaida 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you.

@ernestberry-songsrestored5637 2 жыл бұрын

Excellent.

@muskduh 2 жыл бұрын

thanks for the video

@jacquelinepuga8315 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you!

@elizabethli6758 3 жыл бұрын

really love this small series, but where are the other episodes besides 1), 2) and 5) on the other channel???

@xeropunt5749 4 жыл бұрын

I find alcohol increases my craving for attention exchange & frustrates me when others aren't so willing to "play". Sober, I can better put immediate satisfactions on the back burner, in favor of discipline & my challenging goals. Great vid, Mark! I was wondering if you used the human-givens approach...

@indoororchidsandtropicals358 3 жыл бұрын

Naltrexone or naloxone will give you the power back if you feel like you need a drink. Endorphin deficiency syndrome hasn't been proven but it makes perfect sense to me. These drugs which are usually used for opiate overdose, can help the brains of any type of addict feel more normal according to what I've read. Its oversimplified, but the just is that people who are addicts but don't yet know it or addicts who know they are, have lower levels of feel good chemicals and so when they find something that increases these..well its like the motor oil analogy, and the person soon learns they have no control over the substance. So essentially what these drugs do is make your brain sensitive enough for the natural feel good chemicals to actually satisfy the need to feel good that "natural rewards" would give a normal person.

@xeropunt5749 3 жыл бұрын

@@indoororchidsandtropicals358 Thank you, good to know. This was new for me. I'm not addicted to drinking, though. I feel too good sober, lol. Since this vid was about "attention", I was just pointing out that nothing increase my craving for attention like having a few drinks. I want to talk with my neighbors, find old friends, talk out any old grievances, to make everything pristine. Hard work has the opposite effect. The busy-ness fulfills me, the achievement satisfies me & I have no appetite/cravings for the previously much needed attention.

@Mrblahx 4 жыл бұрын

Thankyou so much

@dv123abc 2 жыл бұрын

Brilliant!

@manidas4789 3 жыл бұрын

Very well explained. Can you please elaborate on those people who practice stone walling? What sort of need do they have?

@powerliftingpremedcrafter473 Жыл бұрын

Control and avoidance

@marcinekpomaranski 2 жыл бұрын

Amazing. Best regards from Poland :))))

@antoinettemurphy6568 2 жыл бұрын

Very good video excellent

@amc7568 4 жыл бұрын

I find it interesting how you use two people as being their own personal cult, with the Whole love bombing affair and I have many family members who are involved in cult like religion. Maybe it's for the attention they receive, because it's not for the biblical knowledge they receive. It's a high control group. Thank God I got out when I saw the Whole child abuse, suicides after their back room meetings. No thank you. Great video. Wonderful job and delivery.

@aquamarine2416 3 жыл бұрын

so true! & scary

@user-dg8du2ep4s 4 ай бұрын

You have an Outstanding voice one of the best I have ever heard And I don't go along with the non state theory because Trance feels good So why not induce Trance as its more absorbing both physically and Pyschcology

@robinrevell5873 3 жыл бұрын

The love bombing in 1987 was lathered on liberally at age 19 and we were married in 9 months. Now 33 years later, 2020, the "love bombing" as I'm walking out the front door shows up as, "You'll be alone the rest of your life. No one will want you".

@RoseRed733 2 жыл бұрын

Seeing this 1 yr later. How are you doing?

@MarchGoldCoast Жыл бұрын

This is gaslighting.. "you are nothing without me".. At least love bombing would be "fake nice" for all the 5 minutes.. Hope awareness blesses your life that you can also pass on.. Peace 🙏✨

@meditationvibration4259 4 жыл бұрын

been a victim of this.

@BIBLE-a-s-m-r 2 жыл бұрын

What’s a list of emotional needs?

@carnivoroussarah 3 жыл бұрын

What is the best treatment for CPTSD? Please, I need an answer. I'm desperate, my life is on the line.

@cathyhsu8840 3 жыл бұрын

@Sarah Gardner Search for Rewind Technique from David Muss. it helped me and hopefully you can benefit too.

@elizabethprocter9698 4 жыл бұрын

At 18.40 you reference Jones Town ... sadly this has been proven to be mass murder, not suicide.

@kayligo 2 жыл бұрын

Do you offer online therapy sessions?

@mirjamw6665 Жыл бұрын

Engine metaphor thirst

@cherylm5002 3 жыл бұрын

Great video, as a survivor of childhood abuse, I ended up drinking gasoline, skill recovering from the trauma over trauma over trauma, thanks for your insights