TOKYO GUIDEBOOK takashifromjapan.com/tokyocompleteguide

"Im almost in my 40s" I nearly fell of my chair. SIR YOU COULD BE 20

And if you’re homophonic, please don’t comment here. Just leave and watch another Takashi video!

"Hi, Stan stans, my name is Stan. Welcome to the Worldofxtra." 😂 Love seeing the representation, Takashii! Thank you!

"I'm almost in my 40's." I can't believe that. He looks so young.

You’ve gotten better at interviewing over the years Takashi! The questions are great and you look for nuanced answers. Just thought I’d say keep raising the bar!

It was tough living 3 years in Japan as a gay man. The good side is you will not be beaten to de@t4, but you also have to live in the shadows. I tried socializing with LGBTQ+ people in a small city (Tsukuba, not THAT small), but it felt like we were criminals, always hiding. And the workplace is not really supportive of any kind of deviation from the norm. Add to that psychological and psychiatric help in Japan is really inefficient, and that discrimination is tolerated in private companies, like hotels, restaurants and so on. Su1c1d3s are common, almost encouraged, and I lost friends in Japan to that. It is devastating. Japan is clean, safe, beautiful, it could be a country of prosperity. Unfortunately people work to exhaustion, there are no vacations (just on paper), and being a woman, black, gay or foreigner will only make life harder.

To be honest you should’ve interviewed more of locals that are lgbtq rather than people who are abroad or visiting it would’ve give people watching an idea of what the people that actually live there feel

Like they said, Japan is very safe & there’s usually no violence. In 12 years living in Tokyo (& Saitama & Kanagawa) as a gay man, I never had any problems in the streets. In contrast, I went back to Barcelona, my home town, for a few days & I some people started to shout at me & my bf, & we weren’t even holding hands. Barcelona is supposedly a very open city, but violent people and homophobes are also very vocal. I never saw that in Japan. On the other hand, I had some problems at work. Like they said, most bi & gay men are in the closet. But when they drink they use the excuse of alcohol to approach you. One senpai at work touched my groin during a work nomikai & he grab my arm, trying to force me to touch his groin. I pushed him, and everyone excused him because he was drank 😤 But it wasn’t the first time (「大丈夫、大丈夫、彼は飲むとホモるから」😳) and apparently everyone was OK with that. I would prefer that they were open & they asked me out normally, not trying to force me like that. That’s the only bad experience I’ve had in Japan, though. My bf is Japanese & we’ve been together for 13 years so there are many nice people too (we left Japan, though… We are getting married soon 🎉 Not possible in Japan yet… )

Another interesting series of interviews. I'm a gay man in the US and have been out for years and years. In NYC I developed a friendship with a Japanese man and the one thing that seemed difficult for me to understand about him was that he never told his family (except for his sister). He moved to the US to be more free and express his gay self but when he visited home or talked to them his personal life was a secret. He even married a man in NYC. My friend died suddenly on a trip back to Japan in 2016. Surprisingly his brother and mother traveled from Japan to NYC for his memorial. When his mother spoke to those gathered you could feel her reticence discussing her son's gay life but also the pain of his keeping this as a secret from her. His brother who seemed a bit conservative (businessman) also told us of his affection for his late brother. The way the spoke about my friend and their son and brother was raw and actually I had to leave the memorial service at this point because I was overcome with emotion.

2:50 Honestly for having watched some japanese BL stuff, it really feels more like a fetish or a hyper-romanticized view of that rather than actual representation. I've never felt represented in any "LGBT" japanese media I've watched, even the stuff who took it seriously felt like representation from the 70-90s with all the shame and hiding of that period. And even so, it really works like a niche. It's never represented like a normal thing in mainstream media.

So here's the thing, as some of the interviewees were saying, if you are Japanese, or came to Japan after you were born else where and raised 100% or close to 100% of the time in Japan, and particularly if you look like a Japanese person, that would make a big difference mostly in a negative way as you live in the society. As I am a Japanese person born and raised most of my life in Japan, went to Japanese schools and worked in Japanese companies as an adult, being gay was such a burden and headache as a Japanese person. Reason being I know is Japanese people around you will look and understand you as a Japanese person, which automatically has an assumption and certain unspoken expectations that you are supposed to know, act, think and behave as everyone else, having the same way of thinking and values, fitting into their (our) historical traditions and cultural background and so on. So this is their "expectations" of you and if you are a man, they ask you whether you have a "girlfriend" or are married with a women and have kids. (If you are a woman, the same thing with the opposite sex) So because I know exactly this is the way the narrow mentality works with our Japanese society, it is such a huge burden to either "come out" or "hide in the closet". Either way, you will be stressed dealing with the hard reality. If you come out, you will need to deal with some people who are homophobic or not necessarily homophobic but ignorance because of lack of understanding, knowledge or mindfulness. If you are not out then you will need to either pretend that you are one of them (straight) and/or keep avoiding at all cost not to engage in any personal conversations or getting close to them. That's how I had to live as a closeted person and it was super stressful on top of already stressful job working in a Japanese company. For that reason, I determined to move away from Japan and come to Canada when I was just about 20 years old and eventually my whole family got influenced and decided to move to Canada in 1994, which when I turned 26 that year. I happened to come out to my family just before we moved to Canada and that made my life much easier because I already had a boyfriend back then. After coming to Canada (Vancouver), my life was much better and so much weight lifted off my shoulders. Such a liberation and I was super happy to be part of LGB (back then I think there were only 3 recognized letters) community. But I was hired by a Japanese company much later in year 2005 and I had to move back to Japan (Tokyo) for my new job. I new what I signed up for, I knew I had to go back to the closet but because I knew I wasn't going to stay in Japan no more than 3 years, I made my decision to do so for the sake of my career. I was so wrong! It was so hard right from the get go. On the 1st day of my job, a younger employee asked me at the first introduction to each other, in front of other coworkers whether I was married or if not if I had a girl friend. I was so stunned about this unexpected question, I didn't know what to answer but my quick wit activated and responded, "I barely know you and why am I being asked this kind of private question?" But this guy didn't really get it and he went on asking me like this, "So by any chance you could be one of those people...?" (implying being gay) how dare he?! I knew he meant no harm but asking me in a very friendly way, (as he was younger than me so naturally he needed to still respect me as I was older than him) Then I responded, "I'm not answering to those kind of questions but I wonder the reason you asked me that question is because you could be "one of those people"??" Then he suddenly refused profusely and I said, "See, you don't like this kind of question either." So I was able to avoid going further with my smart ass response. LOL. Then another incident happened when I was working at my desk in the office one day. A senior female employee who was older than myself by quite a bit, and she was rather obnoxiously loud and nosey person in general, she had to ask me loudly in front of other employees in the office whether I had a partner or married. I really wanted to kill her but instead, I got up and walked to her desk, went to her ear whispered saying, "I can answer to your question. I do have someone in Canada." (Of course that was all lie) Then I went back to my desk and sat down. Guess what she did, as I expected, she once again, had to let everyone know in the office with her annoying loud ass voice, "So he says, he has someone in Canada, everyone!". I was actually in joy she let the whole world know that I am taken and settled. End of story! So after that incident, I didn't get anymore question or funny looks from female employees...etc. Only time other than this incident that I still had to deal with was then president of the company who actually brought me to the company in Japan, asked me in private saying, "Are you married? If not, there is someone I could introduce to so please let me know!". I'm sure by now, if you are not familiar with a Japanese company and people in Japan, this is very normal for many people that they go through in daily bases. This is absolutely so strange and rather invasive or rude stuff if these things would happen in your countries. So I had learned what to say in certain situations and how to avoid wisely...etc. But at the end of this opportunity, working in Japan, there was nothing but stress, stress not being able to who I was, not being able to have freedom nor time to be free, work overloaded, hardly had anyone to talk to, being lonely living in a giant city all alone and missing my home in Canada. Way before I was able to find out my mental state, my body showed a sign and because of so much stress over time, I got shingles one day and the doctor stopped me from going to work all together for a month. I had a mixed feeling of guilt not executing my important job suddenly yet having a break from everything and focusing on resting, my body and my soul. During that month of off work, I had a lot of thinking and had to decide whether going back again to the same O or going back to Vancouver, Canada for good. It was the latter because I knew if I picked the first choice, I would get sick again and then what? I also missed being who I was(am), I missed everything in Vancouver so I gave my resignation to the president after working with them only for exact 1 year. I didn't expect myself either that it was that short but my body and mind didn't allow me to go on so what could I do. I appreciate everything I experienced and learned while I was in Tokyo but I wouldn't want to go back to the same life style ever again. I know this is super long already but if this was a foreign employee, this wouldn't be the same. This is my point I wanted to say, if you are well recognizable foreigner, even if you were born but look just like a "Gaijin" or foreigner, they have different perspective and expectation about you. even if there's something wrong to their mind and what they see you about who and what you are, they can be more tolerant and will overlook whatever that may be because at the end of the day, "You are foreigner.". That's it!! It's simple as it is. So there are so many things you can get away just because you are foreigner although they don't necessarily like it, they will try to ignore that or avoid the confrontation with you because they don't know how to communicate with you. Period. Most Japanese people would rather avoid discussion or even small talk if they don't know how to express themselves or if they think there is a risk of being conflicted or it might become confrontational. The behaviour of avoiding is very common in Japan even between a couple!! So enough said about being a gay Japanese and being a non-Japanese gay person living in Japan. Thanks for reading thus far!

11:04 there is no way this guy is 40+ .... skincare legend

Really great that you are willing to do this video and help put more awareness on LGBTQ in Japan.

The best LGBTQ representation in Japan is that long long man commercial series

Gosh, isn't it just crazy that all these lovely people have to still take into account not being killed or seriously beaten just for being themselves when they travel or move to another place? One day, I hope we all just accept each other. 💓

Please interview Stan’s mom. She has such an amazing, loving, fun & hilarious relationship with her sons! She is inspirational as a mom who shows unconditional love. You can see how accepting she is of all people!

I love your interviews, please keep doing them!

Thank you for giving visibility. I follow many people in Japan who create content and you're the first person I've seen give exposure. I love Japan and can't wait for trip #2 in July/August. Appreciate your spotlights on Japanese culture.

Thank you for talking to LGBTQ in Japan! And thank you to the brave Japanese for speaking openly even when it's still not easy

Very interesting perspectives, with the lady from Turkey for whom Japan is a liberal paradise to others who’ve been in the States or Canada and Japan seems a bit more conservative, and several who grew up in Japan and whose experience is…middle of the road. I did notice - at least from the responses - that LGBQT foreigners seemed to have an easier time of it because they could play the gaijin card. But I really liked the recurring theme that Nihon-jin wouldn’t be confrontational or violent no matter their personal beliefs.

even if you don't agree lgbtq we should treat each other with respect

You are documenting history through these interviews in general. Keep up the great work!!!

I appreciate very much that Takashi is also offering his perspective as a Japanese person, albeit very open-minded, sort of inside looking out. Maybe it is only for topics like this, but more than these being interviews, they become conversations.

thank you for doing these interviews! I enjoyed watching the video : )

I’ve never been so early on one of your videos - interesting and enlightening as always! Much love from Canada & Ganbatte Takashi-san! ☀️

this is a great video!! i would love to see one about transgender folks!

Thank you for this video. This is a topic that has interested me for years, and I've studied it a bit. I read a lot of BL, but I wanted to learn more about LGBTQ issues in Japan (both historically and current). Pre-Meiji, Japan was more accepting of homosexuality, but then there was a shift. As the interviewees said, there are not a lot of hate crimes against sexual minorities, but there is "quiet" discrimination, like in the work place, or school bullying. Many Japanese don't realize how many sexual minorities are around them. They see them on TV and in movies (BL is popular), but they don't necessarily realize they could know people who are a sexual minority, because many don't come out.

I know it's been months since you posted this, but just wanted to say that I appreciate you taking the time to cover it and with the same care and kindness that you do all of your interviews.

That was great! I'm in the US and sex education is a pretty hot button issue. The students you interviewed and those who reflected on their school experiences made me wonder what sex education is like in Japan.

What a great topic! Glad your channel is expanding because your a great interviewer!

Really great video. I enjoyed learning from the guests.

As a queer woman, as long as there are no backwards laws targeting people like me, I still want to visit. I live in the US and there are laws that are being passed in a number of states targeting women and the LGBTQ+ community. Our government is going backwards. I hope it doesn't happen in Japan...

Thank you so much for this video. Would love to hear from Japanese trans individuals especially if you get around to doing another one of these Q&As!

Shinjuku 2-chome in Japan is the world's largest gay town.

Thank you for making this video!! I hope there are more!! Thank you to everyone that allowed themselves to be interviewed as well!! ❤❤❤

Amazing video Takashi! I would watch some other interviewees for hours. 🤗

thank you so much for this video, I would love to hear from more natives about the LGBTQ+ culture there, it is honestly one of my biggest fears about travelling. I am relieved to hear that the risk of hate crimes is low. I am subbing, I appreciate this question as a lot of people are too afraid to ask it, so it's very bold of you and thoughtful.

man you are a hero to the whole community. alot of content creators like you wouldnt try to go near this kind of topic but you did. hats off to you

Great video, Takashi. Thank you!

Thank you, very helpful & informative 👍

Thx so much for doing this!

Thank you so much takashi for this wonderful video! You asked some really insightful questions!

I actually have a colleague who was born and raised in Russia, she is older than I, and she told me totally serious and straight faced "We don't have any gays in Russia"....and when I said "there are gay people in every country", her tone became irritated and she said more emphatically "NO! we have no gays in Russia". How did I end up on this planet of the apes! Just unbelievably small tiny un-evolved minds. great video, thank you! 🙆🏻‍♀

It strange that Japanese people say that being gay is a foreign thing when there is recorded history of lgbtq+ people in the past. Linfamy’s channel has a few videos with examples. There are lots of books, and papers, even drawings with examples.

Thank you so much for watching! Only 90k to 1M subs, What should I do when I hit a million?

Don't forget that Oda-Nobunaga and many other Sengoku Warlord were bisexual, it became taboo after Christianity came to Japan.

Wow! Thanks for informing me about Shinjuku Ni-chōme! I have always wanted to visit Japan, especially Tokyo, and Osaka. But now as an Lgbtq+ person, I have even more reason to travel there to experience, Ni-Chome and hopefully make some good like-minded friends there! Whenever I finally visit Japan, this will be within my priority places to visit list.

i need more stan interviews!! so well-spoken

Dude their outfits look so cool.

Professional reporting and journalism. Really good work

Very interesting, Takashii! Thanks for this video.

Love the videos, man. Keep it up!!!

Interesting video Takashii-san. I noticed when I travelled to Japan last year that same sex couples were quite rare, except for specific areas. I personally saw it a bit in Kichijoji, Koenji and Harajuku, but I don’t know if I saw it really anywhere else. Quite different from Australia where you do see it fairly regularly (at least in my capital city, Brisbane).

Thank you for making this video, Takashi. I hope you could make another one with more "full Japanese" interviewees who grew up in Japan. As a mixed-raced person who grew up in a foreign country for most of my life, I noticed that the societal observations and social experiences I've been exposed to have vastly differed from "non-mixed-raced" individuals who have had little to no foreign life experiences.

Thank you so much for this!

Thanks for this video Takashii!

Once again a great interview and topic Takashii!! Please keep doing the Japanese subtitles! They are SUPER useful/helpful! Can't wait for the next one!!

Amazing questions keep up the good work brother 🤝🏻.

Thank you....very wise and thoughtful comments from people. Good interviewer, handles people very well.

Thank you so much for this video❤️

9:27 I completely agree with that. Course books needs to include the LGBTQIA+ community and that love is possible for any person irrespective of Gender and sexuality. Also include famous stories n poems related to them in the English literature classess too. It'll be atleast a basic step for the kids to know that it's indeed a natural phenomenon and not weird at all. ❤️

That was very interesting! Kudos for including a video on this community!

What a sweet video! Thank you for sharing this. I’m keen to visit Japan 🇯🇵 and I love the people and culture. Your interviews and your own warmth and kindness just made me feel even more enthusiastic to visit! Keep up the great work! SUPERHUGGS

Thanks Takashi, good video! I would like to see you do more videos on this topic as well. 🙏

I love your interviews! You never discriminate or judge people, thank you💕

Stan and Takashii,two creators I really love!! Thank you so much for today's video,I think it's really important to talk about this :> HAPPY PRIDE

@TAKASHII I'M OBSSESSED WITH YOUR VIDEOS. THANK YOU FOR COVERING THE THINGS YOU DO AND THE WAY YOU DO IT. KEEP IT UP

Thankyou for covering this ❤

I'd love to learn more about trans people in Japan! I'm a trans-woman and I'd love to teach english there but I'm scared that my identity will make it impossible. Would it be possible to make a video about that community? Awesome stuff as always! I love your videos :D

I went to Tokyo Pride in 2016, but when I told people there that I was Asexual, they mostly seemed confused haha. I told two of my friends (one was a Japanese Bisexual, the other was a gay guy from a Malaysia) they were confused at first. So, then I explained to them: "Asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction to others, or low or absent interest in or desire for sexual activity." My one friend responded with "Those type of people exist?" "Yes, people who don't feel sexual attraction exist, it's about 1% of the world population." My other friend was like "So you're not Bi or gay?" I explained to that friend that there are different types of attraction and they don't all have to happen at the same time. (Romantic, Aesthetic, Emotional, Platonic, Physical, Sexual). He still seemed confused, then again, it was alot of info that he didn't know before.

Thank you for making this video!!! 🥰 Thank you to everyone speaking up!! It takes courage!!! ❤️

Very good video! I really like your interviews. Keep on doing that!

You are so cool Takashii. Thanks for making this video. Have you ever done a video about disabled people in Japan?

Love this! Keep it up, Takashii from Japan!

Great work. Important work you are doing.

Nichome has been there almost 40-50 years already… I see it in more different point. Through out traveling outside of Japan I found no other country has the specific district for gay and LGBTQ people. It is true it has been oasis for LGBTQ people for many years on the flip side it implies how society avoid accepting those people and as a result they have to squeezed into small district in Shinjuku. This is very specific to Japan imo.

I would not mind if there was a part 2 of this video, keep up the good work Takashii!

You got Worldofxtra on here!!! Stan!!! Awesome!

Your a great interviewer. I learn alot from your interviews and you inspire me to become a journalist and a interviewer.

My favorite KZfaqrs in one video!!!?!!? Takeshi AND Stan & Stewie!! I love it❤

Ngl bro I'm starting to notice many changes in your interviews and u have improved. 🎉

You just keep knocking it out if the park with these videos!

omg stewie so proud of you!!!! 🧡🧡🌸🌸🌸

Thank you so much for this video takashii!!

Omdz he said he was almost in his 40's and still looks 18yrs young amazing. Love you Takashii, I adore how you say channel, I'm slowly learning Japanese and recently learnt about Mora so I'm excited to be able to build and adopt those natural principles. :D

Very interesting video. Love your channel. I spent a short time in Tokyo a few years ago, and looking back, I don't think I saw a single person who stood out to me as openly gay. I assumed it was because standing out did not appear to be what people were interested in. I hope to go back and spend more time there to get a more informed opinion. Just like most of the interviewees said in this video, I found Japan to be absolutely safe, even at night. Coming from America, that was a very refreshing experience and one of the most attractive features of the country.

Very interesting and enlightening 👍🏼❤️

Don't wanna speak out turn since I am straight and not Japanese, but I feel like a lot of the time BL can be less a depiction and more so... I wanna say fetishization but I don't think that necessarily accurate either, but it's less about genuinely showing gay couples as they exist in a homophobic world, and they are more so about playing off the taboo-ness of the concept. It's not written to make people more accepting is my point. (This doesn't apply to every BL series of course.)

Omg you interviewed Stan 😂😂😂😂😂this is so cute

Thank you for this video, I hope LGBT people will be loved and accepted as they are. I think people will be more accpting and open minding in the future thanks to more visibility.

this channel is single handedly making me want to go to Japan

Congratulations on making it to more than 900,000 subscribers! I predict that you will get to 1 million subscribers by the end of this month! 🤞🏾I like your videos and keep up the good work!

Your videos are really great! May I ask what cameras do you use?😊

Amazing work Takashii

I am pansexual and nonbinary, and I am worried about coming to Japan, but I am glad I will at least not get things thrown at me like I do here in the states. I would rather people ignore me than people attack me. But I am glad there are so many wonderful open minded people in Japan. It makes me feel better about my future visit.

Thank you Takashi-san ❤ Enjoyed watching the interview 😊 God bless 🙏🏻 and take care

Thank you so much for your work Takashi ! I looove your videos, great topics. :))

Omg! You Interviewed Stan! 😂 Best crossover ever 😂 😍

Great video! Thank you for putting this together, I’ve been hoping and waiting for you to do this.