This may be an old video but it's spot on...👏🏽🙌🏽💜

The only people the narcissist keeps long term are other narcissist, even though they butt heads because they're narcissists... they supply eachother and try to remind eachother how perfect they are even though they're terrible people. Misery loves company.

I got a dog -- no more narcs. Dogs are loyal, kind, and loving! Great healers!

The weirdest thing is how these "friends" just disappear. If you ask the narc about it, they are vague and evasive. They don't talk about what happened, never mention them again, and express no normal regret that it didn't work out. It's as if they were never there.

They are like a black hole in space. They just take and never give back .

OMGosh..this is so true...They can be such actors and everyone adores them. it's sickening. it's why I now am suspicious of people who are so adored by what seems like everyone. If you try to call them out, all those people defend them and think you are the devil. Better to run, don't walk.

Healing to all you empaths ❤❤❤still in recovery after many years.

People are so blinded by the narcissist! They really do not know what goes-on behind the scenes! What gets to me the most is that they believe the narcissist and not us. I allow no-one in my circle. The trauma of years of living with a narcissist made me this way. I would rather be alone and stay away from the population. A study revealed that 75 percent of people are narcissist. We live in a big percentage of a narcissist generation!

You are so right. The flying monkeys are disgusting human beeings. Thank you! You're the first coach who says this.

It has taken me till my early 60s to find out I have been surrounded by narcissists most of my life. I consider it a blessing to have found this channel.

Why these cluster b's like narcissist, sociopaths, psychopaths are so charming. We can't even realise it at first. They mirrored and show their fake character as if they are the most kind hearted person ever. Deep inside the devil who has no empathy.

I have noticed that the ones that stay are also narcissistic. Birds of a feather flock together xxx

As an empath - you do not question or know what is happening ✨ You do not question it because you do not know 🙏

Right. The narcissist I knew would surround himself with people who he deemed was less than him.drug addicts, prostitutes and alcoholic because he did not do these things it made him feel like he was better. He felt stupid around intelligent people.

My mother is a professional victim. There is always someone who buys her hard life stories.

I'm so glad I'm not alone with this , we all need to keep learning, hope you all do as well !

I got divorced from narcissist and now its a different battle. If you agree with them then they will play nice, but if you say no, then the rage, insults and hate starts. Anyways, once she started insulting and manipulating, I just called my lawyer.

That's true, narcs like a lot of casual friends.

Day 3. No contact. I’m so very grateful I found your channel. I feel like you are speaking to me, saying all the correct things, AND I AM listening! Thank you so very much. I Pray that I remain strong!

I notice my ex narcissist he hung around people that had high paying jobs that had lots of money. He lost a lot of good friends that I liked but didn’t know why but I do now.

I met my covert narcissist online. I met his family and something was so off. When I brought it up he told me it was all in my head. I’ve never met a family so unloving towards me. No one was excited to meet me or wanted to know more about me. I’m off online dating for good.

"The narcissist is an insecure coward". "They are bullies". NAILED IT! Mine actually referred to himself as "The Puppetmaster". 🤮 Flying Monkeys are indeed horrible people...just as evil as the narcissist. ENERGY VAMPIRES! PREDATORS! THANK YOU!!!!💜💜💜

We have the Right Not to be manipulated, abused, or lied to and exploited. Protect yourselves !

My narcissist is so good that she has managed to keep "friends" for years, decades, whom she keeps connected with and visits briefly once in a while. Interestingly, their connection is shallow. She is the greatest con-man.

100% agree with not using dating apps. I let go of those years ago....so many weird people on those dating aps. In fact I met my narcissist on a dating app. Never again. You are 100% right that the narc surrounds themselves with transient 'friends' ---- people who are almost afraid of the narc -- looking for their approval. It's a weird circle of dysfunctional people. Ugg, so happy to be out of this warped phase of my life. Eyes wide open now --- no more narcs.

Your definitely right about his family I believe they know him very well but they protect his image

I always say that there is a fine line between charm and manipulation...

If they can't use you they WILL abuse you

She has NO REMORSE! And you literally just gave me my aha moment about the friends thing. Damn…😮

True, new people all the time, nothing lasts very long 🙏❤️🙏

We moved across country and it was just us and our two children, 19 year marriage. She chose to become friends with her coworkers who were all divorced and or single mothers. She took on their personalities and advice. Kids and I were discarded and she moved in with her new boyfriend from work. I filed for divorce and got full custody of our children. I’m doing my best to heal and provide the most stabile environment for my teenage children.

I have been married to him for 25 yr and after during the devaluation period It seem like he was a stranger. He was never loud and now around the new supply during triangulation he was cursing, loud drinking partying. I couldn't believe my eyes. All I know it was a very scary ending.

Quintessential Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde…..on a dime. Absolutely ripping you apart on their way out, and then walks out the door and the grimace turns to a smile and “hey, how ya doing, so good to see you,” while you’re breaking down in tears against the door that was just slammed in your face. EVERYONE outside that door is CLUELESS. It’s nauseating to see him gloat over how he is deceiving them all, and then the monster comes out at home when no one else is around, and attempts to wipe the floor with their victim to decompress their rage. Pure evil. Revolving door of supplies is 💯% correct! It’s literally frightening to see how easily he dupes each and every person, but all so superficial. You can’t watch it. It’s nauseating.

Gosh you answered a question I always had in my mind. My husband would go to parties with me and leave me sitting alone by myself. I never understood why but I get it now he was searching for a new supply. Thank you for this video!

Man.. this was described perfectly to a T! It’s funny how much more clear things are once you understand the rules of the “game”. The behavior then becomes predictable

I’m gonna do what you said. Block, no contact and start my new exciting life!

My ex narc the alcoholic fireman has many friends who mostly are also firefighters. They are very kind people and naive or turned blind eyes to his character. They drink and do sports together. So he played the Jekyl and Hyde very well. I am sure that they witnessed how he treated women because one of them told me that it was beyond his belief how he treats women as his convenience. I did not notice much deep conversations among them. Superficial partyish relationships with his buddies. He can act. But the mistake he made with me was that I was brave to reach out to his 20 year long buddy who told me to find someone else.

They be around everybody putting on a show trying to see who next

Her best friend told me she was scared of her Her sister told me she was nasty Her other friend got arrested for violence Glad I'm free.

My wife never tried to meet new people or surround herself around people in front of me. She hid everything on social media accounts and met God knows how behind my back

My ex narc had 700 contacts on her phone. She could get everything from anybody every time she wanted to. One of her statements: I would never cheat on you. But if I wanted do, I could any time any day.”

This is so spot on. My ex has to see our kids with monitored visits and he charms the professional monitors. They actually believe the lies. It makes me mad sometimes.

This is one reason why the places of work are overloaded with narcissists. I wonder about what gov programs these companies benefit by juggling human narcissistic resources. Great 👍 video

In my experience the narcissist has long term friends. And these are actually good, nice people. But these people are not subjected to the narcissist on a daily basis as is the people who are closest to him. They see the masked version of him and have no clue what I and others such as exes or even family have seen.

I got cheated on after 8 years, and behind my back she had arranged an entirely new social group without me finding out in the last 4 months of our relationship. All people I wouldn't associate with, and since then she's done exactly what's being suggested in this video. Everytime I've had the misfortune to bump into her she's surrounded by lots of new people.... and I mean everytime. We're both mid 30s and the new people are early 20s and don't know any better. Thanks for shedding light on this it's stricken me as weird and I had some suspicion it had something to do with this condition

I remember my x wife inviting a few people (couples) I didn't know over for a BBQ and didn't tell me till 1 hour before they arrived. She didn't go shopping. We were completely unprepared. These people were at our house for the first time and I was left to talk to them. I had no idea who they were. It was so weird. I sat at the table and quietly said..."I apologize, I didn't know about this, no offense taken if you decide to leave." They said thank you and left. They knew they were being played. That was a pivotal moment in looking at my significant other through a completely different lens.

I have noticed that my narcissist Doesn’t have many friends! But the associates he does have are pretty much like him! He spends a lot of time building his practice! Money and control are most important ! So he must be the “CHIEF” in any situation! And he usually is the leader!

The ex friends were mystery! He avoided introducing to me! I just met few but vaguely not intentionally! I didn’t get then but now I do!!! After he left , I start to understand so many things.

In my experience, the narcissist surrounds themselves with people who are inexperienced at Life, generally younger people. The more experienced (of Life) people will eventually see the narcissist for who/what they are.

You just described my former friend again. I can name close to 50 people, myself included, that she burned with her obsessive, boundary-trampling, disrespectful behavior. As I said in some of my other comments, I don't hate her anymore because I've moved past it. In another one of your videos you talk about karma. I did wish her ill-will for a long while and I realized I was letting my resentment eat me up inside. It wasn't until I became born again, I realized I spent too much time chasing worldly delights and distractions, in a bid to cover up the pain that I experienced from dealing with my former narcissistic abuser. In tune with this video, my former friend quickly discarded anyone that caused her to pause and take a look within herself. Anyone who caught on to her web of deception or when her con games didn't play out the way she wanted, these people would disappear. Of course, she remain completely silent on why her latest new BFF had suddenly become a ghost. When she did open her mouth, the stories were inconsistent at best and the product of bad lying at worst. I'm sure she's told a few tall tales about me since I cut her off and I really don't care. I did hear from my mutual friend (that I was able to wake up to her toxic ways), that she stuttered and spluttered at the sound of my name. He said she didn't wish me any ill will but she didn't want to have anything to do with me. Just the sound of my name made her tremble with fear. I have to chuckle at that.

You have fully cracked the code!! You're honestly a legend.

Speed Dating is so accurate 🔥🔥🔥

My ex didn’t have friends, just work colleagues who he argued with daily, I would feel exhausted listening to him. But no true friends, your spot on not many people liked him, his kids don’t bother with him, they see him for what he is a bully & narcissist. Love your channel ❤️

My narc of 16 years surrounded herself with people who were generally speaking unattractive. She would always have something bad or degrading to say about them after the encounter, or conversely people who were accomplished and then it would be 'He's a doctor, or 'She's a lawyer', etc. Yet she would still have some denagrating comment about them as well. Everyone gets slandered, nobody is spared. Sick, disgusting people they all are.

Absolutely, living with a narc its a totally different situation, a narc groom their flying monkeys paying for their lunch doing them favors so then later put them all against you in a smear campaign. Even when I was trying to go for a vacation and take a break from the smear campaign, the flying monkeys were send my way to just annoyed me making sure I don't enjoy my time and report back to the narc.

supply , someone they control, someone who would listen , someone who can travel miles to bring them food, etc, they gather secrets ,though some are expired , conspire, and divide

Ive seen coverts having lots of ‘friends’ usually people who are down and out or have a lot of problems, they love this because they get to talk about them but also act like they are helpers and helping all these people in some way or another. Carriers of gossip and news that’s all.

My ex surrounds himself with boozers and pathetic people who are always trying too hard to be relevant. They're all misfits, and the relationships are all very superficial.

AMEN, brother!!! I am so glad someone knows! I have had so many people treat me as the problem. I'm seen as ungrateful ! IT'S really disturbing , very hurtful, and lonely. I HAVE NO ONE WHO BELIEVES ME! Ive got to save my breath. Thank you so much for believing!

U crack me up .. Andrew! How u always say .. "Think about that for a minute". You're Naturally Funny! Love your .. Sense of Humor! I do think about .. everything .. u say! Your information .. is Very Valuable! A Narcissist is like .. an "In & Out Burger!" .. just passing through. They Eat & Run .. never staying anywhere .. very long. They can't hold down a relationship. They don't know what it's like .. to be stable .. comfortable & secure. Dedication/Loyalty .. isn't in their Vocabulary. It's .. how can I hit that! Or .. run here & there .. as fast as possible. No loyalty .. love .. security .. perseverance .. or stay power. It's who can give me .. what I need .. when I need it! You're right .. they're Vial Creatures! Totally & Undeniably .. Despicable!

Andrew I've been very encouraged by the amount of knowledge and insight you have about the narcissist. You explain their manipulative and conniving behaviors. I remember how when we were at large gathering my ex narc would often walk around and shake peoples hands and introduce himself by name as if he were running for president. He was very outgoing and I was more reserved. I often felt very lonely and ignored at these gatherings. Your explanation for their behaviors in this discussion are so accurate. It's very evident that you were hurt very badly by a narcissist when you only wanted to give your all to another person and to experience true love. I'm sad that your heart was broken because I experienced the same thing. But just like you, I am wiser now and well never allow myself to be tricked again. It was such a painful experience and your videos will hopefully prevent others from having to go through such a heartbreak and tragedy. Thanks again sincerely!!

My partner surrounds himself with weak people that make him feel better about himself and he hides his true self from them. And the other people he surrounded himself with have equally low values so he never feels bad.

Hindsight is 20/20. You will never understand unless you can look back. You are attracted to them because they are familiar spirits. The ones you grew up with.

My ex-Narc used my "so-called" Best Friend to spy on me after the discard. She would come to my home on many occasions pretending that she was concerned about me. But, I noticed her "line of questioning" was very strange...questions I knew he would only ask. How dumb to think I wouldn't notice that. But...then again...Empaths are always under-estimated. She was definitely feeding the narcissist information about me. However, what I don't understand is...What's in it for her? I thought...maybe she's now being recruited to the new supply?......just saying.

They surround themselves with a ton that'll give them supply. But those who stick around long term are enablers, other narcissists, or people that they like to bully so they can feel better about themselves. Empaths that are codependents that aren't aware so healed yet.

Yes, I did recognize that my ex used to rotate friends, most of them he got into arguments with and they disappeared. He used to hold to tons of business cards and phone numbers of people to feel important. When he would call these people they wouldn’t remember who he was and he had to tell them how they meant, and the people would like “oh” then pretend to entertain him, I almost felt sorry for him. I used to envy the people that that stopped associating with him. Now I’m finally gone.

U r spot on. Thank God we figure out who the narcissists are.

Narcissist usually surround themselves with other Narcissist. The Narcissist in my life has toxic family and friends and they do believe he's the best person in the world because he's charming and wears a mask. He helps people to get recognition and praise. Those people have no clue about the things I went through with the narcissist and they all came against me. The Narcissist rallied up a group of friends and family to destroy me.. The family does know he's a narcissist but theyre Narcissist too so theyre okay with the narcissist toxic behavior. You are so on point with this description.. the Narcissist told me only people who are useful are valuable. These people created a monster. The biggest issue is the big ego theyre constantly looking to feed. Thank you!

Another great and very accurate video! This is my now ex gf! I fell head over heals for her and although I have some temper issues, I gave her my all. She used me, lied, cheated, manipulated, and played the victim. Her family defends her relentlessly and believes her over actual facts of her infidelity, promiscuity, lies. I was so in love with her it hurts so bad.

I AGREE 💯....Knowing my X and only husband a great manipulative COVERT NARCISSISTIC PERSON for about 20 yrs I know this to be true and wish I had learned this earlier... I his ENABLER thought I could change the MONSTER I Loved more then life itself. It took me some years to figure this out, but the signs and what you speak of was all there. Thank God I can never be fooled of a man that wanted me as his arm piece, to juggle treat like a B**** and build his ego...The man I married was an angel even to people that wasn't around long...The man I divorced was a sadistic cheat.... The sex was INCREDIBLE but his ABUSE and MANIPULATION everyone could see but me...He begged for forgiveness and I did forgive but will never forget, then I moved on to freedom and happiness ❣

KEEP SPEAKING PLEASE CUZ I AM DEFINITELY LISTENING N LEARNING ALOT N THANK YOU ❤❤❤

We bet sth we did not even know existed - look the truth in the eye, get up on your feet & walk YOUR own path. We can do it ! Good motivational video - thank you

BINGO; a lot of what he said I have seen in people! some Narcissist like to suck in younger people,, cause, the younger are apt to. A) look-up to an older person. B) apt to trust and please an older person. C) apt to believe an older person. D) want acceptance from an older person.

Explains the back burner babes I discovered. They can have him! I never did. Empty promises...sickening. How could I be so foolish. He had nobody..red flag I missed. Your so soothing at my hour of need. Thanks for all you do!

Yup exactly what they are. You nailed it. 👏 they are so destructive and manipulative.

Help me with the loss of 6 of my grandkids and 2 of my adult children betrayal they each have 3 children. So my sister got close to them and used them against me. After expressing how important my family is they stole every single joy.

My ex was a narcissist also a drunk. He refused to own up to anything. And when he did. He would say something like "Princess Kathleen you are so right" You are always right. Making me out to be like I was somehow being a bully !

What I can’t believe is that so many people can’t see them for what they are. TBH it took me years to finally ‘click’ but always knew something was ‘off’ and in hindsight did everything wrong - public outing and confrontation. Also, some narcs don’t let anyone close

Andrew, thank you✊🏽 I watched you from my discard to my healing journey to seeing the ex narc face to face and not wanting anything to do with them. That in itself was life saving. Now, I want to watch your videos to continue to educate myself and others. The discard set me free and wouldn’t have known it without you and Anoushka and Zions channels. I’ve been taught in life if you could just save 1 person, 1 soul , you did more than great in life. I humbly say you helped to save mine. Continue what your doing brother, it is the good fight

They surround themselves with people who agrees with them I find.

Oh wow you’ve been describing my sister and I’m not considered someone who will elevate her. Andrew I had low self worth and boundaries raised by narcissistic mother so I married twice to narcs. Sister was golden child. Mom has passed and I’m 61 this year and just finally unravelling it all. Moms abuse still has repercussions from flying monkeys in the family. I’m em brass if a whole new way of looking at this mess.

Insecure coward & bully. Wear a mask. Surround themselves with interchangeable people. All so true!

older people. True, no longterm friends. You are so accurate.

No contact is greatest idea yet!!! Will abide!!!

What an extremely interesting topic - thank you. It took me years to admit to myself that a close friend was in fact a coercive narcissist. They supposedly had a wide network of friends but crucially none of them met together with the narcissist in a group setting, rather the narcissist construed to met each and every one separately. I was extremely relieved when one friend said what I had been thinking for years namely that they wanted to be everyone's friend, yet they were nobody's friend. I now see it for what it was ie a mechanism to manipulate and control the narrative. They clearly feared that a group setting might expose them. It was only when I took the risk of chatting to a few trusted others within the narcissist network that I received confirmation that we were all being manipulated to varying degrees. I also recall how the narcissist became extremely jealous when I started becoming friendly with another person within the network. I can now see that they were actually defensive and aggressive, probably fearing they might be exposed if we started comparing our experiences. They subsequently set about breaking up the relationship in order to re-exert control. I'm so glad to finally be free from their control.

Yes! So true! Always new friends that are shallow relationships. I always wondered why the ex narc had no real long term friends he kept in touch with

We love you too Andrew. Thank you for doing this

Thank you for your video Andrew. So true Andrew they are insecure cowards. They will attach themselves onto anything that gives them adoration and countless supply. They are indeed horrible creatures. Looking back I believed in love so much but it was never love. They are the most disgusting miserable toxic degeneratives that ever walked the face of the earth. You so right Andrew No Contact right across the board. It's our only salvation. Lisa

Andrew, in this video you describe my ex, Chris perfectly. He was the king of charm. One time he picked me up from work to give me a ride. He actually took the time to meet most of my coworkers. I was naive at the time. I thought what a social guy. I see it now thanks to you. It’s about getting more supply. I’m thrilled that I dumped him. The last straw for me is when he deliberately ruined my birthday. Andrew, have you ever done a video why narcissist seem to enjoy other people special days such as birthdays?

I find that relationships are TRANSACTIONAL!!

I used to say that mine liked to “pick up strays”. It was not romantic (not to my knowledge anyway) but just PEOPLE, always someone new he was helping or dealing with. I used to think he just had a kind heart and wanted to help. NOW, I know it’s all part of that “I don’t want to be alone with myself and my dark thoughts” pattern that all narcs have.

I'm still living with the narc. But he knows it's over. I don't talk to him. I'm saving money so I can get out. I told him I am done.

Spot on! I was married to the biggest bully Narcissist for 13 years. He is still in close contact with my family. I didn't realize how toxic my family is. Thank you!

The narc is the alien lady neighbor. How could I not see this?!? I know full well now since listening to your video. I always see scores of different people, coming and going, giving some sort of service. Who does this? Only the NARC! Thank for better clarifying on this topic, Andrew. There are so many aspects to the narc that it is mind boggling once you put it all in perspective.

I am coming to terms with things and its extreme pain.

I don’t do dating sites.

I remember one woman calling from Australia in the middle of the night going on about some deal… while he slept. So incredible.

I always say you are the company that you keep.

Who they hang out with and are friends with tells you a lot about them

Another great video and message that helps to peel away that mask of theirs like a rotten onion! I can see now, looking back, that even though I allowed that big bright red elephant exist in the "relationshit" for years - I started asking the tough questions AND expecting 'accountability' - she was FORCED to run fast to her "new supply" because she saw *#&@ was about to hit the fan! When "they" run - I'd take THAT as a compliment frankly! Thank you, Rick