The fact is, when you are secure attached, avoidants won't be emotionally attractive to you at all. Their confusions and constant pull and push will make a secure person walk away, respectfully.

Sometimes they never come back and that'd okay.

I’ve worked on my healing for the last four months, felt like I went to hell and back. Now, he is back saying he misses me and he is sorry about everything. Yeah sure, but I learned to live without him and I no longer have room for him in my life nor do I want to spare some for him anymore. I told him he made a choice and he has to live with it. I held on for so long trying to get him to talk to me, let alone seeing me face to face but he just shut me down and he never wanted to face me. Now I’m good on my own and he is just starting to feel the loss.

Don't think for a second that they wouldn't jump at the opportunity to jump back into a relationship with you if YOU gave THEM the opportunity.

Already moving on from the pain and suddenly show up from no where. That’s crazy for real

You can really say this guy is an EXpert 😂

OMG this... I had never heard the things about the avoidant desiring the relationships they can't actually have, the ones they can daydream and fantasize about!! That is the missing piece i needed to hear to understand my life the last 4 years!! Thank you OMG ❤️

My DA boyfriend left me after living together for a year. After 4 months, he came back then left again and blocked me. I will always love him but, being blocked and hung up on really hurts. It killed the deep love I had for him. He will always come back to me and I will be a friend to him but, now I am more secure and not crazy in love anymore. He did me a favor 💔

I had to watch this video twice. When I came into my relationship, I had the secure attachment personality, but somehow during the pandemic, I fell into the anxious personality category, and she (secure attachment) left after 4 yrs of dating.

Wow, what an incredibly insightful video...a total eye-opener for me! My ex-girlfriend is definitely an avoidant, while I am certainly an anxious type personality. This makes so much sense & brings so much clarity to me. 💯 percent!! As I look back, I remember all of the times when I unintentionally ignored her is when she clinged to me or desired my affection...then roles reversed towards the end of our relationship last year. Now I know what I need to work on to improve myself. THANKS A MILLION - AMAZING CONTENT! 👏 🙏

10 yrs and he dumped me. Heartbroken. 15 months on hes made contact. Wants me back. Had the best yrs with me. He can jump! Im living a nice life. His loss. Hope hes feeling the same pain he put me and our dog thro

This was very insightful. Learned a lot about me and my exs relationship and where we stand as of now.

That’s me anxious with an avoidant

I really can't get enough of this info. Honestly my gut, initial reaction is to not want to have any part in the attachment style power play but the way you closed out the video was very effective in bringing the conversation full circle: It will be a struggle, it will take work, there will be ebbs and flows but if you are with someone who's at least trying and the connection is strong enough, the effort will be worth it. The key for me is to be balanced and really work at having a more stable attachment style

I was anxious then after first break up I became secure, and after last break up, again became the Anxious one!! 🙈 she was running after me when I didn’t give a damn about her in the start pf our relationship!!

Secure attachments will not reach out to you again.

Fantastic info

How sad...people not putting time in God and preparing for the next life...no wonders why they suffer

This is so incredible useful, thank you so much!

Secure persons need to have a weakness that i could work on right? My ex is a secure Attachment Style Person definetely. The Thing is she Always felt that i am weak and told me that (which was true since i have been fearful af in Most situations). Will my Change to an secure Attachment style pull her to me somehow?

GF is an avoidant attachment, I'm probably somewhere between secure and anxious. Yup 13:35 is exactly what is happening. Her behavior brought out my anxious style. Finally I trumped this by telling her it seemed like she needed space. She was elated...two days later shows up at my son's birthday party with her daughter smh.

That’s exactly what happened to me. I became a different person very insecure person. I started to hate the way I was acting. I was always asking myself what is happening to me?

What if neither of these three reasons was why we broke up?

Hey Chris... there was a guy I dated ND he broke up with me 9 months ago now cut to short he always contact me after 30 -40 days of no contact and the last time I had enough coz I was so perplexed by his actions I asked him if you want me then come If not then get your shit out of my life don't hang in between. Then since I am with him in NC again now is 30 days . Any light on my situation?

Hey Chris, please delete these spam scam comments because it discourages people from commenting on your videos.

What if the breakup occurred because you neglected your ex due to focusing on making money too much? My ex wanted my attention but I was resentful that she didn’t seem to care much about how hard I was working at the time. So I slowly stopped giving her attention and that caused the breakup

That’s not always true.

Because you not thinking about them

In that pie chart where is time for children/family etc? Is this video only for 20 something singletons? Just wondering

The quiz doesnt make sense tho. If i am in NC since the beginning of the break up, how am i gonna know if they blocked my number or not? If my ex cheated on me, but disnt confess about it, how am i gonna know if it happened or not? Some questions doesnt make sense, since there is no way for a dumpee to know about 🤷

I am divided on this channel. I love the info about toxicity, but an ex is an ex for a reason. It seems this channel wants it both ways: don’t get back with your ex, but here’s how to get your ex back. How many toxic people are having their behavior perpetuated by these relationship gurus who normalize their dysfunction. Don’t get me wrong, I respect this creator and the information and for the dynamic presentation, but both exes should be told to focus on themselves and find someone new. In the absence of structural change, an ex will always be that. If mine were to come back, I’d probably say: not sure what version of your iOS you’re on, but who I loved is dead and mourned. As I write this the video ends with a most positive bent, still… No disrespect meant but if someone were helping my ex try to get me back (no evidence this is the case), then they are interfering in my growth - any false hope there’s a chance is a Hoover I can’t afford.

Wah?