Why Narcissists HATE When You Stop Reacting to Them

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Why Narcissists HATE When You Stop Reacting to Them

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Күн бұрын

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Why narcissists hate when you stop reacting; respond don't react, when you go no contact, when you abandon the narcissist, when you take your power back from narcissistic abuse, when you no longer are emotionally affected by narcissists rage or anger, narcissists use anger to control you, narcissists regulate their emotions through you, empowering yourself after narcissism

Пікірлер: 78

@PeterAcrat 2 жыл бұрын

This is why a healthy relationship with anyone narcissistic is a No-Win for peaceful people. Get out; Stay out. Find someone authentic who thinks and feels more deeply, and values stability and their personal growth.

@eazyc404 Жыл бұрын

their best relationships are often with ppl that were just as abusive as them, trauma bonding

@heavyjoechipman3594 Жыл бұрын

Bro, I couldn't have said this better. Thank you. Peace is everything. God bless you and yours.❤😊🙏👍

@peterknyk1942 2 жыл бұрын

The narcissists anger and bullying increases when I do not or try to not acknowledge her or her existence....her need for "attention" is so overwhelming....she will use just about anything in her "bag of tricks" to let me know how angry or hateful she is....

@hmmetzify 2 жыл бұрын

They have NO LIMITS

@shaniecegullison Жыл бұрын

Same with mine.they really will go as low as they can go and then go even lower than you ever thought they possibly could

@ritadoran5039 2 жыл бұрын

When I'm doing zero to argue or fight he would rage out of no place and it was very intimidating

@corrieannfletcher5780 2 жыл бұрын

They depend on intimidating you so they can control you easier

@annacarter8703 2 жыл бұрын

Just walk away if they then to touch you call the police. Narctassic is just like a child looking for attention. Don't give it to them even though you might want to say something don't you are in control that makes them weaker

@izawaniek2568 2 жыл бұрын

It is very important not to explode which is enabling them to regulate through us. It is being CALM and NON- reactive that is absolutely SAFE not when we explode which is the narcisists aim to later be able to blame us for being agressive or irrational.

@crencottrell7849 2 жыл бұрын

I will ALWAYS remember years ago I was standing outside in a church courtyard, minding my own business, looking at some bushes. A covert narc I had drama with stood next to me and stared at me for 15 seconds without blinking. I guess she thought I was supposed to instantly stop what I was doing to acknowledge her. As I kept looking at the bushes, I could feel hostility coming from her the longer she stared at me. A few minutes later, I slowly turned around and saw her staring me down 60 ft away with her shoulders hunched like she was trying to get a reaction...I just stared at her and smiled and then she turned her back to me as fast as possible 😯😅🤔

@LadyLibra8791 2 жыл бұрын

They hate because they know they don’t have control over you anymore

@laurahell Жыл бұрын

💯 😊👍

@swanzilla1982 2 жыл бұрын

Cause they know they lost control

@MandiMomOf8Channel 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for this 🙏🙏 This is so true! A while back, I saw on a different channel that "if you stop reacting they'll stop yelling". And that's such a lie! I was so confused because everyone in the comments was agreeing. But my malignant narcissist rages way more if I'm quiet. I really appreciate you bringing this to light!

@shaniecegullison Жыл бұрын

Same with mine He gets even worse

@user-im8xw6xh1l 11 ай бұрын

DITTO!! ❤❤🎉🎉😊😊 I hear you! The longer I disengage from them.....my own parents.....the more sociopathic they get! 😮 I've been recording mine whenever there is conflict. Basically...everyday. I never knew a thing about Narcissism UNTIL I FINALLY TOLD MY FAMILY "NO."

@rvh77 2 жыл бұрын

This is exactly what happens. You stop reacting and grey-rock or ignore, and then yelling turns into cabinets slamming, doors slamming and stuff getting kicked or thrown across the room. And you're just sitting there, holding on to your composure for dear life. I checked out a long time ago. Heart breaks for my three kids.

@hmmetzify 2 жыл бұрын

I hope you can get out. I still have to co parent w my ex and its brutal. Sooo brutal. But we have a few days a week of total peace. Sending strenght!!

@rvh77 2 жыл бұрын

@@hmmetzify thanks so much for the encouragement. I just don't want to be the dad that left. Falling on my own sword I guess 😂

@psychoholiday-ju1cp Жыл бұрын

@@rvh77 I don't want to be the White Knight Lamo Dude who--like a classic self-absorbed chick-- says that you shouldn't have "checked out", and I'm not gonna be! I did that at the end of a relationship TOO (without kids with a childless woman and I'm 49 and childless too). I also stayed what could be arguably considered staying a little too long even though it was just a friends-with-benefits situation by that point. If you're going to actually, "quietly make an exit strategy"*... And if not, to quote narcissistic wisdom adage, as you know, obviously, "RESPOND DON'T REACT." That being said, dealing with an insane situation like that, don't beat yourself up if you skip and react every once in awhile. . But, hey, I had to do the same thing you're doing right now without the kids part until I finally got out. Stay strong, brother from another mother. You WILL figure this out (whenever or IF ever you need to)

@damian4402 Жыл бұрын

Record them and put them in jail.

@chryselene 6 ай бұрын

Ah! So starve the beast. If you starve the beast, after a while, they will see that you are no longer a source of the sustenance that they crave. It's like they feed off of your heart - your soul.

@danielfisher1501 2 жыл бұрын

I used to pour my heart out to a girl i loved and had feelings for through messages and she was horrible back to me.... i started realising every nice word i ever wrote was to myself. I was writing to myself. Im amazing, i can do anything i set my mind to etc.. Word after word which was nice was to me. And her words to me were horrible. She was writing to herself. I feel good about who i am. Hense the thought 'return to sender' My love returned. Her hate returned. Choose your words wisely. 👍

@chip4003 2 жыл бұрын

💖

@vasilminkov4046 Жыл бұрын

How you treat others is how you treat yourself! You realized something very big on your own. Good job man.

@BryanAllen-kt1vq 3 ай бұрын

Silence cannot be misquoted

@ziplocktheimpostor1402 2 жыл бұрын

Just do what they do best ignore em... Their rage is their own undoin and becomes their own sufferin I learned to Just stand my own true ground.... Never let fear of em dictate your lifestyle etc Simply realise your own authencity is prio 1#

@johnmcvicar1947 2 жыл бұрын

This Short-clip reminds Us, To be aware, that Narc's need to manage Their inner-dysregulation, through Your emotions. Expect Narc to use every trick in the book, especially now, as We Enter the Trickiest Time of Year (Holiday Season). Ounce of prevention, is worth a pound of cure. Good Timing, Thank you.

@chip4003 2 жыл бұрын

… indeed tricky seasons are upon us! I’m working on grounding myself

@michellevelasco6727 2 жыл бұрын

This is So True and perfectly said. If at all possible do the work to reprogram your subconscious mind so you can keep moving forward.

@isiahwashington2999 Жыл бұрын

It is a life of suffering. How to handle the suffering is to 1) never react 2) ask for nothing 3) know this is temporary and some day you will be free 4) start living a completely independent life. They will then realize they have no power. They can try to divorce and you will be free but have costs or if a so called friend will become bored with you. Either way focus on self control, accept that life will be miserable but temporary. Pray every day for strength and to do Gods will.

@lastthingsministry 9 ай бұрын

Don't rely on them for anything. Rely on God instead. They demand to be treated as gods, when you deny them the throne (through fear or adulation) then they will seek worship from someone else or they collapse (decomposition)

@user-qv9nw1dq2f 4 күн бұрын

True. The healing journey takes time and patience and self-compassion.

@alimccreery755 3 ай бұрын

I disassociated and disconnected and the person is now acting scared because I’m not reacting to their nonsense.

@feliciadunlap4307 Жыл бұрын

There is a belief out there that narcs choose people because of their empathy. If this were true, then we wouldn’t also be seeing narcs get together with other narcs, borderlines, and sociopaths. Narcs like reactivity, empathy would be a bonus. If we stop reacting to narcs, they will eventually get bored and go away.

@jane-ew2jh 2 жыл бұрын

When u react u will think u r a problem when they ghost and u will look crack and when u dont react u will see them ghosting but ul know u r not a problem

@julietamalo6881 2 жыл бұрын

I can't thank you enough for bringing this topic to light, Michele. Have a wonderful day and God bless you 🙏💐🎉

@Nick-cs5yc 21 күн бұрын

It takes beyond extreme discipline to deal with an ADULT TODDLER, aka a narc!!

@rodvan-zeller6360 2 жыл бұрын

Another excellent video , thank you. What you describe is what we call an "operant conditioning feed back loop". When you finally explode you reward the narc's behavior , when you don't you get punished by the narc for your behavior.

@psychoholiday-ju1cp Жыл бұрын

One iit only becomes those two options (after too much devaluation going on here and there from them).... ghosting seems to be the only reasonable option to me nowadays. (I'm getting too old at 49 to WASTE MY TIME get sucked into other people's fights they started with me, or telling them how to behave!)

@natashaevsimon1441 2 жыл бұрын

Narcissistic Abusers do break the law though

@annagkl7005 2 жыл бұрын

Emotional abuse is almost the same ,like physical, i know ... :,-(

@susansmith4784 2 жыл бұрын

Emotional abuse is worse than physical abuse, stays with you for many years, way after bruises heal

@valeriegonzalez6629 2 жыл бұрын

I really appreciate your incisive understanding of the interpersonal dynamics with a narcissist.

@DivineAwareness88 Жыл бұрын

They do in fact get worse. Theyre just clowns seeking attention & its sad how they wake up and go to sleep miserable lol oh well 😂

@LisaCaseyComedy 5 ай бұрын

I finally stopped reacting & he told me to never contact him again 😂

@susansmith4784 2 жыл бұрын

So true👍 I initially ignored them when they ranted, *big mistake*

@annacarter8703 2 жыл бұрын

Walk away it no law saying to have to stand there and listen.

@susansmith4784 2 жыл бұрын

@@annacarter8703 It's 'wrong' to stay and listen, and wrong to walk away. No win situation ...

@clairelurose1386 2 жыл бұрын

This is what my sons mother is doing right now. She’s not getting a response from me, she uses it as fuel

@menotyou6254 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you thank you Michelle in my search of all these channels for assistance on what I allowed myself to go through I am really enjoying your input your delivery in your contact you and this channel are much appreciated thank you so much

@DaRyteJuan 11 ай бұрын

It’s been really weird lately. I’ve come home twice this week feeling really grounded and essentially in a neutral mood. I have resolved NOT to say ANYTHING my mom could give her two cents about. Then she starts telling me about her day. I just affirm everything she says. THEN Zshe goes, “I WAS having a REALLY nice day. NOW I don’t know what it is.” So basically, only when *_I_* walk through the door, try to have a bowl of ice cream in peace does she suddenly start to become dysregulated. But I don’t react to any of it. If she wants to tell me about her day, fine. If she doesn’t, fine too. I’m not sharing ANYTHING from my life with her. I DON’T need her validation in any way. I’m just gray-rocking her. She can go off the rails if she wants to. I’m not going there. And surprisingly, she ends up deciding not to EXPLODE on me after all. I hope I can sustain it long enough to get out of here alive. 🤞🏻

@EsotericOccultist 2 жыл бұрын

Truth!

@seneavajohnson5296 Жыл бұрын

Thank you for educating me tonight.

@basicwm9 2 жыл бұрын

My brother is a narc if i ignore him he gets really mad "HEY IM TALKING TO YOU" i reply im not talking to you and walk away he gets almost into a rage state then i say your anger is not my responsability. He does not know how to react to this it frustrates the hell out of him. After doing this a few times i have trained him to approach me in a much better way. I dont react at all to him in not giving him what he wants. I have no right to control how you see me so you can see me any way you want a great way to say i dont care what you think there are many was to repel the hooks he throws at me

@johnpaul2285 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you Michele Good morning Blessings

@Arashabdi 2 жыл бұрын

Wow. Wish I saw this 5+ years ago. I was poisoned for a long time and dying now.

@elhadjdiallo633 2 жыл бұрын

I hope you're OK sweetheart please don't die ok we want you to live as long as this universe existe be well and stay bless !!! That the reason why I love and enjoy being alone !!!!!

@chickenbiscuit4525 2 жыл бұрын

It's important for them to embed their pathological illusion fantasy in the exponents mind. It sustains them like a mother of worship. But do we let them..? 🤔

@noneofyourbuizness Жыл бұрын

Oh my lord. For the first time ever I did not react . My mother is hating it . She weirdly came bacl to me all normal the next day ,( it never happen ) kept reding her message and not reply . Omg she is trying to make me react by sending me quote and citation.... she is trying to be cool and cold She is literally behaving like a 10 years old child because I am not reacting . Its funny to watch

@shettydhanu9211 Жыл бұрын

Thank You, I will try this

@RobertLaTuso 2 ай бұрын

How do you not answer a question when they are demanding an answer? What phrases can you use when you avoid answering direct questions?

@oozziehalifa4435 Жыл бұрын

It’s hard when really I’m still dealing with her verbal abuse and narcissistic behavior because of my 4 and 3 year olds we share and live together with. My peace and sincere heart is taking the beating however.

@Amylyn.. 8 ай бұрын

Yep a psychopath ... I thought 😮it was an emotionally abusive kind for 8 years then my (baby) car breaks needed changing ..the cylinder in the drums were all broken and leaky....he tried to kill me because i offered a ride to work... I love my car a lot more than some dude❤

@Angell_Lee Жыл бұрын

Thank you so much love xo

@anjho1397 Жыл бұрын

my inspiration ilove you

@lindagurrera685 Жыл бұрын

So true

@hmmetzify 2 жыл бұрын

How do you manage around a raging narcissistic co parent? Def true they get 1000x worse , will do or say anything to get a reaction. Even through our kiddo. Im so confused and scared trying to manage "co parenting" w my narcissistic ex