I’d like to make a small correction about the P90 (and MP7 by extension) and it being developed to penetrate Russian body armor. Shortly after I said this, old documents from the NATO pdw trials were released detailing that penetration of hard body armor was never a goal of the PDW trials. Mostly the goal was to find a low recoil, high velocity replacement for 9mm. There are two videos by Oxide and 9hole reviews on this subject that are very informative. At the time, the info about it “being able to penetrate hard armor” as a design goal was correct, but new info disproves this, and I was wrong. However, both 5.7 and 4.6 AP rounds are capable of penetrating soft body armor, though I cannot speak to the effectiveness, as I have not tested it personally. Also: Magnum Research is located in Minnesota, not Wisconsin. Whoops, lol

Funfact: in the concept art for fallout 4 it says "pipe guns were designed to look like they were made by someone who knows nothing about guns but wanted to make guns." This is not a joke

"Just because the magazine is sticking out the side doesn't mean it's bad, just means it's an uzi" I know very little about guns, but this statement broke me, thanks Mike.

Zach’s reaction to Fallout 4’s assault rifle is my reaction to Fallout’s armored fighting vehicles.

"I can tell you use a Dragunov." "What gave that away?" "The black eye."

Default Fallout 4 Guns: *Exist* Zach: “And so I took that personally.”

Fun fact, the "Assault Rifle" was meant to be a handheld lmg used exclusively in power armor. But Bethesda scrapped the idea it was designed for late in production.

Funfact about the handmade rifle is that it is possibly a reference to Boris, a guy in Massachusetts who made an AK out of a shovel with some extra AK bits he had lying around, its actually really interesting and hilarious

6:46 Zach tries to disagree but then makes a noise like he can't really blame Mike for not trusting gun milimeters

Mike: "I can't do gun math! You guys have weird rules!" Zach: *Tries to sputter a defense, but concedes the point before answering the core point.*

I actually saw Zach's rant about the Fallout 4 "Assault rifle" a while ago and decided to replay a bit of the game for nostalgia's sake. I was able to get a legendary version of the assault rifle and modded it to be as OP as I can get it. And since the game allows you to name guns, I thought about what was the most appropriate thing to name it when I remembered this clip of Zach talking about it and decided to name mine "Zach's Nightmare" and I used it for like 80% of my playthrough.

35:23 the original concept art for the Fallout 4 Assault Rifle was originally meant to be a LMG for power armor troops. It was meant to be a cross between anti-troop and anti-heavy armored troops.

Zach is just... ADORABLE when he's freaking out about a ridiculous mod for his virtual armament. Or, as he put it, when "someone was goofin and made dumb stuff."

Zach: "let me throw this on the ground and show you... Let me save first" The void: "damn he's getting smart"

6:45 Mike: "You guys have weird rules" Zach: "N-" **thinks about .357 and .38 being the same diameter, the US Army naming their 105mm recoilless rifle ammo "106mm" to avoid ammo mix-ups, the .410 cartridge using caliber instead of gauge like every other shot shell, and many other examples** "Yeah..."

In case Zach still wants to know: the SD in MP5SD probably stands for "Schalldämpfer" which means silencer.

I love how they have so many mods that I genuinely don't know if Zack can tell the difference between vanilla and modded guns

My fiancé repeats, "It has holes so that makes it better" everytime she sees a gun with holes on it since she heard Mike say that in the first rant video 🤣

12:27 Zacks utter disgust was so funny. And the added NO was the cherry on top of the cake.

Fun fact: the Mac-11 mods scope silencer is a reference to Kurt Russell’s weapon in the movie escape from New York.

My problem isn't the crude assemblage of a pipe and parts thrown together by raiders. It's the pre-war abomination they call an assault rifle.

You know a gun is cringe when Mike stops playing devil's advocate and just starts laughing

The flashlight coming off with the Bizon magazine sent me into a state of panic because it got me thinking "how many more helical mags with flashlight attachments do you have!?"

I hope someday there’ll be a mod/game that has a “zach approval” award

I can only imagine what would happen if Mike & Zach ever played Borderlands for the channel. We'd probably get like 50 more Gun Rants just from how rage-inducing the guns in that game are

I will always enjoy Mike being exceptionally spec'd into M16 knowledge and nothing else

54:37 Zach: "I bought a $600 flashlight." Markiplier: "Weakness sickens me."

i can imagine zach getting frozen for 200 years, waking up, and lecturing people on guns like this

The utter despair in Zach's voice when he sees a gun that either makes absolutely no sense that not even god himself could try to explain, or just a butchered version of a gun he may like.

With the pp-19 bizon I love how Zach didn't notice that the flashlight is mounted to the magazine so every time you reload you're also changing out the flashlight

Zach's "NO!" after Mike suggesting he convert the Stechkin to FLECHETTES is hilariously delivered

For the P90 thing, you can technically weld plastic, but it's really easier to just mold the plastic into the shape you want in the first place

"What is it?" "The assault rifle manufactured by Saint-Étienne armory." "What's it called?" "That, but in French."

there's something incredibly wholesome about zach starting a bit at 10:58 seeing the dog, stopping everything until he is out of the way then continuing his bit

I think everyone here who has watched this a lot of times can all agree his happy noises about getting the FAMAS is one of the best moments.

I still enjoy how when Mike says "guns have weird math rules" Zach ALMOST argues before pointing out that 8mm is larger than 5mm.

Zack: Mike, you can do math. Mike: I can't do gun math, you guys have weird rules. Zack: Yeah, you're right.

For anyone who’s wondering, the SD in MP5SD stands for Schalldampfer, meaning sound suppressor

The absolute deadpan delivery of “ah yes the beckler & toch mp9” was an absolute masterpiece.

As a GFL player these videos make me sound a lot smarter to other GFL players, thank you for teaching me so much about other guns

Zach: "hands up mailbox!" *waits for dog to pass* Zach: "hands up mailbox!" 🤣🤣

"Why can't you just like things, and not be interested in other things?" "Because some things are utter trash and shouldn't exist" Man after my own heart.

I’ll try to give some details on the famas since I recently completed basic training in the French forces during which we mostly use the famas. After that it’s standard issue hk416. I’m left handed so basically you can switch the extractor to the left side on the famas bolt, reassemble, then attach the cheek rest dust cover piece to the other (right) side and your famas is now left handed (as in, shell ejection to the left. Otherwise it’s completely ambidextrous controls wise. The piece at the top is actually called a "carry handle handguard" if I had to translate it from "poignée garde-main". It is detachable also. It has to be, so you can zero the ironsights, and for maintenance. The reason why the French don’t like to walk around carrying it this way is because we don’t like having the barrel of the gun pointed at everything as we move around. It’s considered sort of a "gun safety" issue if you will. Cool gun overall, has two different rear sight flip ups including a precision one that can be used for shots up to 600 meters. Tricky if your eyesight isn’t perfect but it does work. Firing blank rounds is the only thing I’ve seen cause cycling issues. That gun is mostly plastic but hell can it take a beating! (Source: there are many ways you can hit someone with it, and trust me their bones will break way before any of the gun’s plastic parts lol)

Love how when mike found an mp5 he pretty much came on the spot. Also, the halo CE magnum is considered a weapon of mass destruction. Give like 2 to a single Spartan and they could use it to wipe an entire race out unless a jackal sniper got em. Hell, give it to an odst and they can probably wipe half a continent.

Been looking forward to this. Zach’s rants are the best way to learn about firearms and history.

Nothing is better than Mike trying to intentionally make Zach rant by dropping inaccurate gun facts and Zach falling for the bait every time since he’s a massive gun nerd. Amazing dynamic, never stop going guys, love the stuff!

Bruh Zachs goblin giggle when he finds a gun he likes is probably the funniest thing I've ever heard

We can all agree that the vanilla weapons in Fallout 4 are just fucking ugly. Especially the Assault Rifle.

I'm sorry if anyone has already said it, but here it is: The FAMAS can be converted to left hand in about 5-10 minutes. You just have to swap the cover you put your cheek on to the other side and do the same for the ejector on the bolt

I love how even with the obvious modded weapons Zach's general reaction is still the same with seeing the weapons that came with the base game: "OH MY GOD WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO YOU?!?"

That Kalash at 17:40 is actually quite legit :) It's from the shortened series of AK-102 (5.56x45), 104 (7.62x39) and 105 (5.45x39). I do love the flipped receiver though :)

"It looks like absolute dogpiss" is one of those soundbytes that has permanent residence in my brain.

Pistol: *Has Flechette conversion option* Zach: *”Hol’ up, wait a minute, SOMETHIN AIN’T RIGHT!”*

Me: *listens to Zach talk about the P90 being meant for russian body armour.* Also me: Well, guess it'll finally see that use, then.

I really enjoyed him talking about the B&T and as soon as he mentioned the rotating barrel, I thought "I wonder if he knows the Px4 has that as well?" Such a great pistol. Easily the smoothest running .45 I've ever shot.

Zach loves the P90 so much, I wonder how he'd react to Stargate where almost everyone uses it

Real quick if I remember my halo lore, the AR and the Magnum have built in cameras right above the barrel that would interface with a soldiers HUD. And so to "aim down sights" they'd essentially be looking through the camera on their visor/eye piece. IDK if that would realistically be useful, but I do know it helped cause if someone stole a UNSC gun, they most likely couldn't use the camera and thus had a gun without iron sights.

Imagine if Zach and Mike played Hot dogs, Horseshoes and Hand grenades. Zach would be drooling in that game with the level of detail and amount of guns.

Hearing Zach _thrash_ the assault rifle is music to my ears..

A 600 dollar hand guard on a 2000 dollar gun, zach this is how you get your house invaded

For the Halo Ma5D that cowling is removeable, to reveal the iron sights, but a lot of marines keep it on because their helmet's have a link the gun to see where they're aiming that way. Also the gun is too small because the dimensions for it were based off the super soldier Master chief who is like twice the size of most people. So yeah, too small looks like a toy in his hands. The Halo Pistol is similar in the cowling, that top part of it has a camera that is linked to most marine helmets that acts as 2x scope. Its chambered in .50 cal because in halo Ce that is what it felt like due to Bungie making a last minute oopsie with the gun balancing. You- You probably don't care...

35:44 "Believe it or not Zack, people in the apocalypse hodgepodge their guns" this is 5 times as funny if you know that the rifle they are talking about is from before the nuclear war

"Hands up Mailbox!-" **politely lets Dogmeat pass** "Hands up Mailbox!"

I love when Zach gets started on his gun rants, Mike tries to play devils advocate and talk logic into why it is but Zach's just completely lost in his gun nerd tunnel vision to realize or care XD

I love when you can *hear* the shit-eating grin in Mike's voice when he's clearly just trying to make Zach mad. And I'm certain Zach knows, but just can't help himself getting mad.

I could only imagine what Zach would say if he saw all the guns and customizations in Payday2

Zach: says pipe gun Me: has vivid flashbacks to Brandon Herrera and his pipe gun

27:50 made me laugh harder than I should have

24:20 That was with the old ones. The "new" generation of rifle grenades has a bullet trap so you dont even have to switch ammunition. But for the love of God do NOT fire a live round into an old type.

Zach's joy about everything to do with the FAMAs is so pure and infectious.

36:57 I figured out the mystery, it's an Ork gun from 40k.

Man, Zach going off on the design of the Fo4 "assualt rifle" POS was wonderful to hear :) thank you Zach for putting in to accurate words what we all felt when we first picked up that horrible FEV reject of a weapon :) I have a mod that replaces that weapon with a different one.

"And Heckler and Koch started Hi-Point." And just when we thought we'd make it out of 2022 without a true WWIII...

I would love to see the game which can actually live up to Zach's meticulous nitpicks when it comes to what does and does not make sense on a firearm. I feel like that game would simultaneously be a gun nut's dream and a casual FPS player's nightmare.

So an interesting thing about rifle grenades, back during World War 2 they were literally just hand grenades where you put the grenades in a contraption to hold the spoon down and fit it over your rifle, then you'd pull the pin in the grenade and fire a blank, yeeting the whole assembly off your gun and the spoon popping off when the grenade hit the ground

The way Zach reacts to his gun suddenly being different is how I imagine the 3 bears in Goldi(y?)locks and the Three Bears reacting when they find all their stuff messed around with, particularly the beds 😂

I was having a really shit day until I got the notification that we have another classic gun rant. Mood is instantly improved. Thank you Mike and Zach

1:16:41 A common thing in Halo lore is Smartlink. You probably have noticed how most marines have that eye peice, the gun links up to that and creates "Smartlink Optics"

I know it's about guns, but I lost it at his reaction to the npc talking about a tanned molerat 😂

I was waiting for Zach's rant about the "assault rifle" and I was not disappointed! XD

Bone to pick here guys; the Desert Eagle is actually made in Minnesota, not Wisconsin. Don't go giving the cheeseheads credit for our idiot-cannon 😁

1:17:00 if i remember correctly human guns in the halo universe are connected to a hud display thing on the soldier's helmet (in CE it's the green eyepiece thing), so it will just show you where it's aiming at instead of needing a sight. Though it's probably just a lore explanation for the hud seen in the games.

Mike cracking up over the tiny bayonet is hilarious.

The interaction between a gamer who is a subject matter expert and a gamer who is just a massively entertaining troll is always so much fun Expert "its not supposed to work that way and heres why" Troll * *Baits the expert into a rant while using incredibly over the top puns* Expert * *Fails to notice the puns and just dives right into an hour long rageful expulsion of an incredibly complicated topic*

"In the post apocalypse people tend to hoj poj their guns" Thank you mike for saving some of Zach's sanity by not telling him that its prewar

57:08 Today we learned, that The Deliverer makes absolutely no sense as a gun. Meanwhile, it's probably the best Pistol in the entire Game (without Mods).

Listening to this in the background, I could pinpoint the exact moment when they start discussing the assault rifle.

I just wanted to say thank you. I learned so much about guns from your series on gun rants. When I fly in a plane, I downloaded the series and listen to this. Thank you so much 😊

From my understanding the fallout 4 "assault rifle" was designed like this so it would look good with power armor & was originally supposed to be a light machine gun. I'd honestly rather have the service rifle with a drum mag mod or simply add the stoner 63 that way we could have an RPK like rifle

Man I'd love to see what Zach would have to say about the "Slaught-o-matic" from Cyberpunk. It looks like a toy, sounds about as pathetic as a cap gun, and is somehow capable of full-auto fire.

Love when Mike messes with Zach’s guns and then waits until he notices

The blunderbuss started out as a solution to losing powder from shaky hands when muzzle-loading. It was intended to function as a funnel. Of course, then people realized that you can’t exactly aim well past a flared barrel and so just started stuffing it with shot.

This series has helped me learn a lot about firearms, but ammo sizes still confuse the shit outta me. I can relate to Mike when Zach talks about ammo sizes. I would also like to see Zach go through all the guns in Battlefield 4. They have basically all his favorites and I'm curious on what the game gets wrong.

24:53 to answer Mike’s question, while there are safety features in some more modern rifle grenades, typically the force from shooting a live round through one is highly likely to detonate it. There’s a famous picture of an M1 Garand, Barrel split open in four pieces like a banana almost the entire way down to the receiver, and the wood basically gone, while laying against the legs of the soldier that fired it, though it doesn’t show him from the waist-up. Reportedly that particular blunder cost the lives of three men.

Fun note on rifle-grenades around 25 minutes in. There are some recorded examples of people attempting to fire rifle-grenades with ball ammo (because they forgot to load a blank, mostly guerrillas) and it ending catastrophically, also there were some early designs that required pulling a pin to arm, though I don't think they had a fuse per se.

Problem with the Desert Eagle is you fire it, and it takes out your target. And then your fridge. And then your neighbor's dog. And then your neighbor.

Still awaiting the day when we get a "Mike's Gun Reviews" on the energy weapons like he proposed in the last part of this series!

Fun fact; that pistol bayonet is a real thing, you can buy in real life, and put on your real gun. I think it's even officially licensed from KA-BAR.

About the Halo Weapons: The cowling on the top is actually the housing for the electronics system, both the ammo count display and the link to the HUD on marines' helmets in-universe The iron sights are under that cowling but we never see them used in-game The animation of "gently pushing the bolt forward" is based on the animation in the games where Master Chief actually rides the bolt forward instead of letting it send itself home The pistol in Halo CE was so hilariously overpowered that it had to be retconned to be in .50 cal and firing explosive rounds; the Halo 2 and Halo 3: ODST pistols are more like normal pistols.

The way Zach’s voice fangirls out when he’s excited bring me … joy