Here is the link to all my best resources: beacons.ai/nar... chapters 00:00 Intro 01:12 They'll Walk ahead or behind You 04:25 They'll abandon you 06:25 They won't socialize
Пікірлер: 544
@arthurian9085 Жыл бұрын
There should be a mandatory class on this in high school. These are toxic abusive predators and people should know the early signs
@gogosylvia293 Жыл бұрын
Excellent idea. Teach teenagers, who often display narcissistic tendencies by nature of being teenagers, a complicated subject that even adults take to an extreme.
@sassy46201 Жыл бұрын
True
@gigantopithecushominoidea8779 Жыл бұрын
Antisocial behavior in adolescence is learned behavior, they usually live through hell at home and can't even identify it as bad.
@PatriciaaBrown-bt2bg Жыл бұрын
I agree with you100
@hawaiigirl8089 Жыл бұрын
Wont work- narcs are CHARMING when they want
@erikavaleries Жыл бұрын
Yes. Walking ahead, NO affection, ALWAYS ON THE PHONE, acting unfriendly to anyone socializing with us, wandering off alone, wanting to leave early, and on and on.
@ai172 Жыл бұрын
Ditto behavior by my covert narcissistic spouse
@sassy46201 Жыл бұрын
Trust me.
@flybyorb6858 Жыл бұрын
Ditto also, dissapearing off, ignoring you, talking just about self, and as if they're not with you.
@Amanda-ny4oz Жыл бұрын
Never affection no holding hands nothing! Just like hes ashamed to be with you... that's what you feel like
@Amanda-ny4oz Жыл бұрын
Also, he had zero friends absolutely none!!
@dclarke1896 Жыл бұрын
You are so right! The feeling that narcissistic abuse leaves you with is something you have to experience to truly understand! It’s like silent torture
@davidcoppotelli3957 Жыл бұрын
Agreed 100%
@Amanda-ny4oz Жыл бұрын
Yes!!
@andersdottir1111 Жыл бұрын
They will: flirt with others, walk ahead of you, go only to places they want to go to, will be rude to waitstaff, will be anti-social with friends/family. All training you to NOT to go out with them.
@pinkropers Жыл бұрын
This was him AFTER we married. Nothing like this before.
@mafunasekaisi2290 Жыл бұрын
Everything you have said is true
@mayfair108 ай бұрын
@@pinkropers YESSSSS! Me too. It started as soon as we were married. When we were dating he made me feel like a queen - so proud to be with me, "showing me off" Then after married, he was rude - walking ahead always, silent dining, rude to people - except those he wanted to impress. Bought a smartphone before the honeymoon. The beginning of the end. I've told him if he had treated me that way when we were dating I would never have married him. But, of course -- the person I dated was a mirage.
@hologramgrave Жыл бұрын
My gosh my ex treated me like this! He walked ahead of me and got angry if I asked him to slow down. It was my fault for not walking faster. Same with driving if he was ahead of me. He’d drive really fast and I couldn’t keep up. And at the grocery store if he would lose me he would yell at me. When we went out, he would disappear and talk to everyone else. I asked him to please not do that and he told me not to be auch a bump on a log. He told me I wasn’t any fun bc I didn’t talk to people. I told him it would be nice if it would seem like we were a couple. Of course he got angry. And when I’d ask him a question, he would answer, but he wouldn’t look at me, he would look at someone else while he was talking! He would leave almost every weekend to go hunting or fishing, and I stayed home to take care of our house. When we dated, he would rather party with his friends than be with me. There were SO many red flags that I didn’t see. He kept blaming me for it all. It sure did have me feeling very alone and sad. He didn’t care.
@king-qo8fi Жыл бұрын
yessss when you’re involved with a true narcissist, you will feel ALONE even when you’re out together. He does this ON PURPOSE. They are 👿 evil. cruel.
@Lifeishort17 Жыл бұрын
My god mine walked ahead to never could keep up with him
@Lifeishort17 Жыл бұрын
It feels like everyone is talking about my Ex It describes him in everyway its scary very scary I slipped up yesterday made contact after I had blocked him asking for closure no didn't get it all i got was how horrible of a person I was 😔😮💨
@callie411211 ай бұрын
What I used to feel guilty about was that my ex didn't have anything original to say and all the responsibilities would fall on to me. I would have to plan everything and he would ruin the holidays and especially our anniversaries all the time! But these people truly are empty and I felt guilty for feeling like I was laying next to an empty person who was actually evil! Even though he was involved in the church and the music ministry it brought glory to himself.
@user-to1mk2um3h11 ай бұрын
So now he is your Ex. Thank 👍 😊 God. Efrat.
@barkingtree88 Жыл бұрын
Your own company and solitude are better than the company of a narcissist. And there's nothing wrong with going out alone!!
@belladonfinique Жыл бұрын
He would definitely walk ahead of me when we went ANYWHERE. It was almost as if he wanted to appear “single”. He always kept his AirPods in his ears when we went out or constantly asking me to take pictures of him. He refused to take pictures of “us”. Basically the focus was always on him so I can totally relate to this situation. Thank you so much Danish, I constantly watch these videos and it brings clarity to what I was experiencing with my ex. 🙏🏾
@yeswing10 Жыл бұрын
He postested pics of himself on FB, all the trips were paid for by me. Weird how they know how to pose everytime.
@mesha0932 Жыл бұрын
Wow I wonder if my ex and your ex are the same person. This is exactly how my ex husband acted in public. Always trying to appear single and walking 10 feet ahead of me, especially when we were at the airport. They are weird.
@abbyxiong393111 ай бұрын
He seems selfish and attention seeking on top of being a narc. I had the same thing happen. Looking at old photos very small number pictures while we were together. We were both not even close in the photos. 🧐
@user-to1mk2um3h11 ай бұрын
Thank God, He is your Ex now. 🙏👏 It is so hard to be Separated from a Narcissist. It is like an Adiction to A Narcissist. You just Saved Your Life 👍💐 I wish you a Lot of Love and Happiness 😢 You just saved your life. Efrat. Israel
@jaishreemovani61188 ай бұрын
Hi Danish l watch all your videos in my case it is opposite actually l leave him move ahead N enjoy. Myself instead of feeling bad and mad but his eye is always on me watching all the time he comes to me control me abuse me N then he will go ahead N enjoy
@sthomas4634 Жыл бұрын
Finally I have an answer to why he either walks ahead of me or behind. Usually he walks behind. I gave up walking with him decades ago and I walk alone. It helps to know this is just another one of their idiotic activities.
@prairiegirl1782 Жыл бұрын
Yes he walked ahead of me, held the door open for a complete stranger (a woman), chatted her up and then let the door slam in my face - twice in one day!
@Grgiana071 Жыл бұрын
From my experiences - married fo24 years with an narcissist man, YES definitely you are right!! 👍👍. Narcissistic people are crazy - mental illness. Never underestimate narcissistic people. Outside with narcissist, wandering eyes, walking slow behind me, if we have special occasions he’s suddenly gone, talking with specific person by hours, thirsty attention mostly with opposite sex (cashier, supermarket’s staff - colleagues) he’s totally make me crazy and embarrassing me in everywhere. Put me down and over reacting. Shameful and heartless.
@freud589811 ай бұрын
@nansandri9672: You are so right about their shamelessness/lack of decency and common manners. Of the narcissist men I have known/seen/observed who flirt/carry on with every lady (ages 9 - 90) 😡 in public (especially in front of their wife/girlfriend) I have NEVER seen any of those ladies WELCOME such unwanted attention. They were embarrassed/uninterested/repulsed by such overt flirtation. My opinion for their lack of interest is by the time such a man reaches the stage of openly embarrassing his wife/girlfriend, he is a loser anyway. A lady who is not involved with him certainly doesn't want to be, and she probably feels sorry for his wife/girlfriend. Also, these men tend to not be very good looking/handsome to start with. 😁 That is part of their own inferiority complex to want to come on strong to every lady they see. Really handsome/secure/sensible men don't act like that. Pity the poor waitresses/check-out girls/store clerks who are badgered by such losers all day. 🤧
@victoriagibson411 Жыл бұрын
They will talk more to the bar tender or waitress more than you. I literally felt like a third wheel on my own date😂
@irenacoll5662 Жыл бұрын
Their ego is a parasite that is never satisfied
@1027MissBear Жыл бұрын
On my wedding day, after the small ceremony and reception , we went to a nice restaurant. While I sat across from her thinking how beautiful she looked and how "lucky" I was, she was giving all her attention and kindness to our waiter , while ignoring me like I wasn't there. ON OUR WEDDING NIGHT! We were not together long!
@wms72 Жыл бұрын
My ex husband DID THE SAME THING. I actually said to him "You sure like the waiter!" (Like a fool, I stayed with him 33 years.)
@robinellison Жыл бұрын
Yes, all of this. The walking ahead or behind, the abandonment in stores, museums, etc., the terror-inducing driving in the car, the lack of socializing at table. It's a lonely life with a narc. The worst of it began on the honeymoon. We were in Yosemite in winter and had decided to ice skate on that first morning. The rink was outdoor, beautiful and very popular. After I put on my ice skates I looked up and he was gone, into the skating crowd. So I skated alone and confused on my honeymoon.
@lilyflower4962 Жыл бұрын
Yes, the constant looking for who they can impress next. Who can they put on a show for, as if they are a performer or entertainer. What we don't realize at first is the show is a circus, and THEY are the clowns.
@callie411211 ай бұрын
Yes once they have you locked down in a marriage or other kind of commitment, then the real persona comes out! We are faithful we are loyal we have morals and values that they do not have and so they use that against us!
@sunnycatc649111 ай бұрын
I hope you've gone! The devaluation started immediately on the honeymoon also!! Took 20 years to wake me up, but so grateful to be out of it today. People like Danish are very important.
@freud589811 ай бұрын
@@lilyflower4962 I love your circus/clown comparison. Right on!
@mingo2024 Жыл бұрын
My ex was terrible. He always walked ahead of me, never opened the door for me, always flirted with every single waitress we ever had. He also spoke a few languages and would speak in another language with other people and go on and on for 30 minutes. I couldn't take it anymore.
@hannahm1223 Жыл бұрын
💯! I had several, severe panic attacks while dating a narcissist. He didn’t care. He’d mock me, socialize without me, and eventually flirt with other women to try and replace me. I haven’t had attacks like that since he discarded me years ago. Coincidence? Nope!
@caseteamcouture8633 Жыл бұрын
samesies
@UnknownUnknown-yl1lt Жыл бұрын
Yes! The mocking thing is so degrading. He did that to me too. How is it that all narcs act the same? Spiritual maybe?
@Amanda-ny4oz Жыл бұрын
You know it's good to relate to everybody because all these stories I've gone through every one of them! I think we all have! I got mad at myself for staying with the creep so long
@Theowlhawk Жыл бұрын
Lol! So true. Dinner in a beautiful restaurant, great service, I was ignored, he read a newspaper held it up, couldnt see him, not a word said. He didn't answer me when I did speak. When we left, got into the car, I turned up the radio, nice music on, and gazed out at the night sky, he went mad, he said that I was in a crazy mood, what was my problem??? He went into a full rage.
@winnieamar9368 Жыл бұрын
So crazy.
@Universaltruth333 Жыл бұрын
That’s insane…if it’s not about them they throw a tantrum like a little kid.
@sandys2672 Жыл бұрын
He expected you to beg him to tell you why he ignored you at the restaurant. How dare you be peaceful!
@nazleyvanblerk1703 Жыл бұрын
Yes I was often abandoned in a mall for hours on end only to get told after finding me crying on the floor next the vehicle in parking area "where did you dissappear too, oh I only see now you called me 20 times and I see your messages only now". Damn backward walking giraffe with a tutu and combat boots. Thank you Lord for setting me free from this predator
@HAHA1266. Жыл бұрын
Again. I thought my ex NARC was just a jerk...I mean who does that? Grocery store, spot on. He would literally disappear, return and scold me for wandering off. Well I guess going isle by isle putting groceries in the cart is wandering off. 🙄. Going out to eat...he made it the most miserable experience so I never wanted to go anywhere with him. Just fuel for his smear campaign. It's all just crap. Crap behavior.
@anncrosby6157 Жыл бұрын
He held my hand in the love bomb stage he walked ahead of me in devalued when I said wait for me hurry up your to slow I was waiting on a heart prodicure at the time in front of other people he put on this fake self so nice and once we left the abuse started over nothing I did everyone else was treated like they were important but he treated me like he hated me 💯💚
@martuskarogowska Жыл бұрын
I think another reason they walk ahead or get lost in public places is because they are unable to be still and with themselves. They have to be constantly on the move to escape themselves. My father would always do these things. Apart from that, he also embarassed us by looking at younger women...He would literally turn 150° to look at someone he just passed 🤦♀️
@andreaanonymous5474 Жыл бұрын
I'll be honest, I have never experienced any of these things with any of the narcissists that I have been around. But I have routinely seen this with people in relationships that are not really that invested in the relationship. People that just aren't very into the partner they currently have. The people that behave these ways are looking for someone else. They will cheat on you, they aren't that invested and they will leave you for someone else if they find someone they like more. This does not mean there is anything wrong with you. This has everything to do with them. Move on and find someone that wants to be with you. Someone that deserves you. Someone that treats you like you treat them. That's my advice for anyone that reads this.
@Ifanythingeverhappenstome Жыл бұрын
I remember visiting his family for the first time at an event. He kept leaving me by myself sitting alone. I thought it was weird but didn’t understand it was a red flag
@marlastininger7720 Жыл бұрын
They always say I'm embarrassing & act like everyone is more important. Things he discuss me with he would never do it with his "friends" like he won't smoke ciggys around his other female "friends" cuz they don't smoke but i don't smile and he'll disrespect me by smoking in my apartment when I've told him not to. or he uses me to like show me off. Its weird i can't explain it. my ex husband used to walk ahead. They always try to provoke me with Jealousy. I've been completely left at store or in a different town.
@reybae Жыл бұрын
Why is this so accurate?😳 My goodness.. I literally had to confront him about being on his phone all the time while we were out, he always walked ahead of me which made me feel insignificant, and he'd constantly be looking for ways to cater to the people around us while I felt like I barely got to socialize with him.. wow 😳 this video is my experience in a nutshell.
@meloneymoore8856 Жыл бұрын
I'm very thankful because I no longer have any narcissistic people in my life at all. All my friends and social contacts are all psychologically and emotionally healthy people.
@jensanges Жыл бұрын
Yes, the grocery store. What a horrible place! Danish you have captured the very essence of being alone in your marriage to your narcissist. It makes me feel better knowing I can relate to you through what you are saying out loud, so I thank you for sharing your experience and knowledge.
@jessc2090 Жыл бұрын
I have a hard time living in a house with a Narc. Minimal speaking, very little visual contact. Nothing in common any longer.
@dneanstokes4478 Жыл бұрын
Yes, if you can start doing thing on your own and find things you enjoy, to do. I have been to deal with narcissist for over 30 years and finally free.
@jensanges Жыл бұрын
@@dneanstokes4478 I’m on my own now and I’m learning how to love myself and live again!
@VaswatiDeb Жыл бұрын
If you want to be stressed and waste your hard earned money for gathering some shitty experience, then travel with a narc. You will know how hell feels like.
@tabbylove8611 ай бұрын
Absolutely
@gigiw.7650 Жыл бұрын
He would grab the grocery cart in Walmart and stride away when I needed the cart to hold onto. I started going to sit by the pharmacy and relax. He didn't like that. He'd rather I search the isles, gasping looking for him. I started getting my own cart, and that really twisted his knickers. 😂
@juana948311 ай бұрын
Spot on! The wandering eyes, the flirting with others, ignoring me, walking ahead, the mobile, the headphones, the rage to make me want to just go home so he can go and do what he really wants to do. So so lonely. And if you say anything at all, the gaslighting and denial is tremendous.😢 Ruined holidaus, meals, celebrations etc etc
@vaaniv9442 Жыл бұрын
The grocery store behaviour is soo true. Every time he would hide in some corner pretending he was looking for things which would make me panic searching for him thus losing my time and energy not focusing on things for which I went to the store.
@maryspriggs8435 Жыл бұрын
We lived in India for six weeks together while he trained pilots for a new start-up (regional) airline. He was the center of attention and I literally had to keep silent and walk behind him. He loved this experience and never noticed how lonely I felt.
@SamanthaWho Жыл бұрын
My mother always made sure to seek attention by being loud, causing drama and usually belittling you over simple things. She should always be seen and heard.
@SamskaraSystem Жыл бұрын
I actually started taking candid photos of him walking ahead and behind of us, they are pathetic and hilarious! As well of as when he would leave the FIVE of us to go sit on a bench to survey other women when we went places. I saw him looking at other women, and he started flirting with them in front of me. Thankfully that was the tail end, i had a pretty sweet reverse discard that didn’t even require me to cheat, and I’m now in a hoovering phase that feels great flat out rejecting! Thank you, Danish, for all this knowledge. I stand in my power a bit more every day with your help!
@claudialange1484 Жыл бұрын
My mother enjoyed everyone else more than me, made me feel like i was boring. It was always like this.
@sameeraaftab8096 Жыл бұрын
Exactly my spouse and my mother do exactly what you said. We stop going out with them ,its a pain to be with them , they inflict nothing but misery, yelling all the way in the car.
@wms72 Жыл бұрын
We went to every festal dinner at our church over about 20 years. HE NEVER SPOKE TO ME. He claimed he couldn't hear me, but he heard everyone else, even someone speaking behind his back!
@neeruahuja2014 Жыл бұрын
Same happened to me, whenever I was with him, l was alone, lived like this for 36 years 😔
@wms72 Жыл бұрын
You surpassed me. I stayed with my narcissist psychopath 33 years. I hope it got rid of some Purgatory.
@neeruahuja2014 Жыл бұрын
@@wms72 thanks
@jtb815511 ай бұрын
33 years of purgatory for me too. The last 5 years, have been wonderful. They do so much damage. I don’t know how I survived the 33 years, with them!
@kerethajackson243511 ай бұрын
I'm so sorry to hear that you went through such a terrible experience for so long. It's truly a terrible experience, awful. But God has brought you through .what did not kill us will only make us stronger 💪🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 ❤❤❤❤
@neeruahuja201411 ай бұрын
@kerethajackson2435 thank you so much, if someone understands your pain, that really means a lot, thanks again ❤️
@dr.mallikagoyal7293 Жыл бұрын
Every word is true. Actually it is great to be really single and alone, the torture is when they insist you are a couple but then humiliate u like this constantly. So u are neither alone nor their significant other which leaves one completely confused and paralysed…..neither here nor there. If they did not insist on the “relationship” the victim could enjoy the perks and complete freedom that comes with being single. But to insist and trap them into the prison and then act like they themselves are single while the victim is somehow bound and accountable to them.. therein lies the problem.
@UnknownUnknown-yl1lt Жыл бұрын
I'm literally speechless..I'm struggling to find the words to thank you for your expertise. Every single thing you described is absolutely what I went through..down to every little detail. You're absolutely spot on. I always thought it was me, or maybe I was overthinking, or maybe I was boring and not interesting enough, or not dressed up enough. I always blamed myself when he just couldn't seem to connect with me when we were out together. He always walked in front of me, flirted or stared at other women who were the complete opposite of me. It was just an exhausting, confusing relationship. This video helped me to understand everything that I questioned for so long. Wow!! Thank you for all that you do and please keep the videos coming. This is life changing information for people who have been through narcissistic abuse. It provides answers we need to all of the chaos and confusion we have endured 🙏
@anithaw5760 Жыл бұрын
OMG!!! You stole my words. This is what exactly happened in my life . Beware! The flirtation won't stop there. You would be devastated to find the number of skeletons in his closet. I have lost counting. Thankfully mainly to Danish &other narcissistic experts out there I am in a better place now. Feeling much relaxed. 😑🙏
@rasidahharun785 Жыл бұрын
Me too. Same happend to me. Not wonder now. Thanks Danish. Absolutely true
@myview6899 Жыл бұрын
Same with me.😢
@ADK308 Жыл бұрын
Actually its life changing transition after seeing this video... me too used to think may be I'm not good enough for him.. used to think very low of myself... but each word in this video is liking flash back of my past.... now I have taken strong steps demarcate the boundaries and learnt to ignore him while coparenting my 12 yo son
@abbyxiong393111 ай бұрын
The whole dressing the right way for him was me too. I rarely got his attention in public. I often caught him staring at other women. He never owned up to it even after I caught him flirting with them in front of me in public.
@dianevitale1214 Жыл бұрын
SPOT ON. The selfish ways always present. Never felt of any importance to him. My covert narc husband ONLY does what is of some benefit or pleasure to him. Giving and/or sharing is not for him, quite the opposite.
@loriclowers2521 Жыл бұрын
At the grocery store, he would get 1 basket and have me get another 1. He would send me to one area of the store, while he shopped a different area. I thought he was being "time efficient" until I understood about narcissitic personality disorder. During dating he didn't do this. He waited til we were married to start this behavior.
@eleanorwittering3126 Жыл бұрын
Always preoccupied… They’re entitled to be preoccupied.
@stephenatherton1623 Жыл бұрын
Yes Exactly. I have been studying my pet Narcissist, for over 3 or so years, using content like this to clarify, kinda what I always knew. Mine is over-friendly in his manner to complete strangers, he makes me cringe, in the grocery shop, predictably engaging in conversation, when all these people want to do is get the shopping and get out of there.
@shaguftasana6817 Жыл бұрын
It's totally true. I experienced this for 14 yrs. It's really hard to survive.
@LoveSource1111 Жыл бұрын
Yes they will abandoned you in your darkest hour
@jet4415 Жыл бұрын
My narcissist took me out to a very nice, small Italian restaurant. As usual, he said order first which I did. He proceeded not to order any food or drink for himself and leaned back and watched me eat. It was so uncomfortable and mean. I am not fat.
@erikavaleries Жыл бұрын
Wow, so weird
@csc8697 Жыл бұрын
He prob only had enough $ for one.
@jet4415 Жыл бұрын
@@csc8697 No, he was a doctor in a speciality. We met at church, beware of church men!
@king-qo8fi Жыл бұрын
HE IS A FREAKING WEIRDO ! how bizarre, he orders nothing yet sits back to watch you eat. He is the hole of an azz.
@king-qo8fi Жыл бұрын
& YES! watch out especially for the big self-proclaimed BIG CHURCH MEN CHRISTIAN. mine went to church every time the doors were open, involved in any kind of ministry, leading people to the Lord, yet was a womanizer. He does street preaching yelling Bible verses to cars and holding signs with his weird church. Meanwhile, behind the scenes he is the OPPOSITE OF CHRISTIAN. He is pure 👿 evil.
@emilyashley4820 Жыл бұрын
Unfortunately this is true; someone invited me to dinner and there was no dinner, just buns on a plate. He gestured angrily to the plate. There was mud wrestling on the TV and I had to ask him twice to turn it off. Which he did with a snarl. He sat opposite me, picked up a sharp looking letter opener and began jabbing it at me aggressively while he spoke aggressively to me, giving me an intense unblinking stare. I thought it would be a group dinner; only he was there. He never asked about me, just talked about himself. I left feeling 😪 traumatized. And when I mustered up the courage to discuss this with him over the phone he immediately said he couldn't remember that event. This had been a pattern of will he be nice or will he attack. There was never any discussion of this behavior; never. In that sort of relationship you have no power. This person was a relative. Once I told him that I had value and he retorted that everyone has value, insinuating that I was saying I had more value which was not at all what I meant. His treatment told me loud and clear that he didn't love me at all. So I went no contact.
@arthurian9085 Жыл бұрын
This is exactly how they work. I am truly amazed how Danish knows all the minute details. This was the closest thing to dating Satan. Ignoring me in public, looking to the side (stonewalling) in cafes and restaurants, ignoring me at parties, openly and deliberately spending hours on the phone and watching me suffer, setting up situations that would upset me, ignoring me while her Messenger was ringing like crazy and I was visibly upset, talking about wanting to date other guys while we were on vacation, asking me to leave to spend the whole day in the hotel room without me ... And when I said I was done with her, crawling back and making up, only to resume this sadistic abuse. This is the closest thing to dating Satan. There should be public announcements about these sick poisonous creatures, people should be taught about it at school so they know the early signs.
Going out to eat, and leaving the person alone to eat by them selves, while they smoke, or if at a buffet, spends more time getting food than eating it. While no talking, or having a conversation, and on their phone. Yea a grocery store, another one. my narc always loses me all the time and have to look for it to put stuff in the cart. Walks in front of me while i see other couples walking side by side. Also in this scene there is no converation, as it says'" im trying to shop. Family get togethers on narcs side, left alone in a room with our kids, while it talks with its Family.
@Cahoo.U Жыл бұрын
My partner was a professional comedian. He had a lot of club "friends". The apologies were always "I'm sorry you have to been offended". He'd do all the things you mentioned. I'll leave it at that
@rehanaaliali2205 Жыл бұрын
Absolutely true and because of the negative outcomes all the time I stopped going out with my husband altogether, right to this day👎
@susanfromthemountains1754 Жыл бұрын
The same here. I'm with ya on that decision . 👍 I am married over 38 years to my husband, and thanking God for Utube channels like this. My regret is that I wasn't born in the age of this information getting out. I had no clue till about 5 years ago even the word "narcissist", and all this excellent helpful information is a blessing to me. We have 9 children together and 11 grandchildren so far. I won't be leaving now anymore. My husband is better as he's nearing the last chapter of his life and the age of death approaching. I've learned so much in these past 5 years. I apply it and it works. I'm growing leaps and bounds. Thanks for sharing what you said you do. It's what I've chosen too. God bless you. Let's remember each other when we say our prayers. Thanks 🙂
@Canaday291 Жыл бұрын
Ex I divorced would always make sure to show how unworthy and insignificant my children and I were by walking way ahead of us. He’d also disconnect any interest in conversation paying attention to only himself or pretending to show interest in others. We’d get to places and he’d immediately strategize to ruin the moments throwing his tantrums to antagonize a negative spin ,create chaos ,anxiety, stress, and fights by constantly complaining , name calling and bad mouthing , then impatiently rushing commanding everyone to leave and then use his specialty of smear campaigning and triangulating to create division and alienation by getting my innocent kids he coercively controls and uses as his pawns to yell at me that I’m “purposely “taking my time making them wait… even if I was doing all the work getting all the presents for Christmas, birthdays, groceries, …..
@alzihr191919 Жыл бұрын
Perfectly explained. My husband is always on the phone in a corner while I'm trying to enjoy the moment. If I call him and say " why don't you enjoy or come along " he would put up a rude face and bring up all horrible issues like business and people he needs to deal wit etc... He will make me feel guilty that I'm enjoying the moment. It is always heart breaking thinking I'm wasting my life time and energy with him who cannot give me a moment of happiness . A narcissist is a no no person in your life . Sadly many of us don't even know such a mental disorder exhist.
@AnnPlatts-ck5wn Жыл бұрын
Spot on. A truly horrible experience. As you so rightly point out, only people who’ve had this ghastly experience understand 😢
@joecaughman6746 Жыл бұрын
Here is a big one. When you're out with them and they run into someone they know, they will refer to you as their friend, not their boyfriend or girlfriend. It hurt me every time she did that, as though she was ashamed to be with me.
@princesscarlet1 Жыл бұрын
or their acquaintance....
@Ptls68 Жыл бұрын
I do not g’et introduced at all
@Universaltruth333 Жыл бұрын
I introduced him as my friend. I only did it because behind closed doors he was cruel and I was simply reciprocating the same energy back unconsciously. He didn’t mind if I introduced him as a friend. He didn’t care. He was jaded so I became jaded which sucked cuz that’s no way to live.
@healthadvisor464 Жыл бұрын
Omg now watching the rest, he did leave sometimes in grocery stores, or an outside event. AND when it came to dinners, he would always leave for a cigarette right before the food was served, and at my place he would not eat at the table with us. He preferred eating on the couch, away from my children at the table. He said it was "more comfortable" but now it makes sense 💔 Thank you. I'm happy I have cut the ties. Years of head games and abuse was not worth the mental anguish 🙏
@pinkropers Жыл бұрын
Once we were married, this all began. For years he has had his meals in his recliner.
@lisedoucet8984 Жыл бұрын
I wish i knew all of this when i was in my 30's, i seen this so many times with my ex narc, he use to walk in front of me, never waited for me, like i was invisible to him, i recall being invited to his niece's wedding and he left without me, i was so sad and felt betrayed, i decided to go anyway and meet him there, once i got there he looked mad and did not want me around. I was shocked and so destroyed inside out. T'ill this day, i am still single and getting educated on this topic. Thank you Danish 🙏❤️
@breakthroughmoment1647 Жыл бұрын
My narc mother jumps ahead of me, upping her pace as she’s leaving me “in the dust,” and sending me the clear signal that she’s directed and resolute, while I’m just her “lallygagging” appendage.
@janedoe5229 Жыл бұрын
Any time we went anywhere, I looked forward to it so much, he picked fight with me, we would leave early, and I would be crying in the car while he was accusing me of flirting or other things that didn't happen.
@jl9769 Жыл бұрын
Dinner , usually quiet. But when wait staff stops by to check on us, all of a sudden talking or joking with them, or other customers while waiting for our table. I say how’s your day, he’ll quietly say fine, then start talking with anyone else. I’ve learned to just enjoy my dinner and not care how he acts when we are out.
@victoriakennedy4811 Жыл бұрын
yes - the shops - any shops - especially when we were supposed to be looking for things together - he would always disappear and he would not be found for up to 30 minutes or more and then he would say i was supposed to have my phone ready - he would go out but not be with me at all the whole time he would be with other people and sit with them away from me and look at everything they were doing and leave me alone at the table with other people who I did not know - even on our wedding day he would not dance with me but sat at the table by himself - while I danced with other people. This was a regular problem.
@daniellekennedy8118 Жыл бұрын
i thought I was watching this to deal with the trauma from growing up with a narcissistic mother, but wow -- you have totally pegged my soon to be ex-husband to perfection. And, this is something I did not realize. How could I have been so blind???
@eleanorwittering3126 Жыл бұрын
The thing about them speeding when you get back in the car… While you’re in the car and they’re in control of where that cars going, how fast it’s going, with your kids in the backseat You’re a prisoner! And they can scream at you, they can yell at you, they can go anywhere they want, make it last as long as they need to yell at you… I used to contemplate opening the door and throwing myself on the road…, But I couldn’t allow him to end up with my girls
@fridaybird377 Жыл бұрын
Or put disgusting music so loudly that you can't handle it. They like speeding like is the way to show you how much is willing to kill you actually. And the shouting is best when the windows are opened... Sick people indeed.
@Universaltruth333 Жыл бұрын
@@fridaybird377I asked him to turn the music down and he rudely replied “ I can’t do anything anymore” like a rebellious teenager incapable of correction.
@carlab174811 ай бұрын
I stopped riding in my Husband's Car with him about a year ago because of similar experiences. When we go out to eat, I will drive my own car and meet him there. I'm really glad I did this because a few months ago, we met up at a Restaurant, he got angry at me over something really silly, got loud, and tried to Embarrass me. I grabbed my purse and left him sitting there in the Restaurant. I'm so glad that I drove my own Car.
@eleanorwittering312611 ай бұрын
@@carlab1748 I’m glad you left him at the table and I hope you walked out without paying the bill!
@eleanorwittering312611 ай бұрын
@@fridaybird377 they dig and dig until they find something that isn’t irritant, and then, like a laser beam, they utilize that adjutant. For so long, we only had one car. I brought a car into the marriage, but he sold it out from underneath me without my knowledge. He kept the money of course, said it was God’s will. It took me four years to stand up enough to the man to buy another car for myself. And, when I did that, I did not give him a set of keys. I let him know, that car was mine. And, from that time on, until I separated from him, I never got in any car with him driving.
@meloneymoore8856 Жыл бұрын
I was always treated like this by my narcissistic siblings and narcissistic exes and former narcissistic friends.
@smithashenoy2742 Жыл бұрын
You have studied them so deeply. As you Were telling these I was recalling every event my husband made me feel hellish. Then I stoped going out with him. Slowly we stoped being seen together in events...
@2fiah_914 Жыл бұрын
Mine would always walk behind me and inside the store or in a party he would always wander off by himself and leave me by myself. It’s a weird feeling you feel with them. It’s like you know you’re together but you feel like you’re not.
@KombuchaBuzzed Жыл бұрын
You just described my ex. Always on the phone while walking the dogs together. The most road rage I’ve ever seen. I’m so much better off without him.
@katalinlakatos496 Жыл бұрын
Every experience happened to me. The grocery store, walking ahead , not socialising. It is still so painful. Thank god I managed to leave . You helped me with your videos so much !
@tamihunt3659 Жыл бұрын
So true Everything you say. There's no excuse for their behavior. They make choices
@theliberatedplanet Жыл бұрын
He actually used to whistle for me in the store. I told him the story about my brother and myself when we were kids and that if we got parted my brother would whistle for me but I was talking about outside in the woods not in a store. But he must have remembered that and it would be so humiliating that he would be whistling for me like I was a dog and actually I wasn't even that valuable to him.
@darleneattard5712 Жыл бұрын
This is so amazingly true! I’ve experienced this. So grateful I woke up and finally kicked his ass out!!
@miram55011 ай бұрын
This is so frighteningly true. They'd always walk ahead and try talking to everyone except for me . Even on "dates" he'd literally talk to every and any help he could . I still hate even going grocery shopping because I get so triggered. It'd get so bad that I'd start crying as soon as we'd get in the car . Thank you so much, this has been so enlightening
@Kim-ek7xy Жыл бұрын
He always leaves me in the grocery store and he doesn't answer his phone when I call him. Never says a word to me when we are at a restaurant, he's too busy looking at other people and the waitresses. He walks in front of me always. Same in a restaurant, he always goes first, even though I told him I'm supposed to. His manners are horrible, he doesn't care. I hate going out to eat with him. In fact, I don't even like getting in a car with him. He won't let me listen to the radio, or even talk to him, he always says he has to focus. He's gotten worse with age. Thank you for sharing your videos, you are always spot on.
@corinasaebels9076 Жыл бұрын
You are an incredible individual! Ever since that I found your videos, you have touched on every single thing that I have, and still am going through with my husband. Thank you so much for these wonderful videos that you do. I now know that I am not imaging things, and I am not going crazy. You are truly helping me so much. I am hoping that I will have the strength to leave this very toxic, evil man soon.
@flowersofthefield340 Жыл бұрын
He's been through it himself .... And in the long run helps soo soo many people to make sense of these disordered people and enablers
@Tend2Rose Жыл бұрын
Walking ahead!…absolutely! The supermarket, yes this happened a lot. When he came to my hospital appointment with me, he had to leave and go walking around. Never sat with me. Would leave me in the car often, and yea, he drove like an absolute maniac. He was aggressive and upset people on the road. I was always feeling insecure and unsafe with him. I never felt like he was proud to be with me. Yes, experienced the chatting to female waitresses or even anyone in the stores - always had to make conversations with strangers. He would praise customer service staff and make them feel like they had done so well, when they are just doing their jobs - he made me sick. I hope he gets all he deserves.
@loriclowers2521 Жыл бұрын
He also would speed, drive recklessly, try to dodge a coming train, put on his brakes almost too late, etc. (sometimes w/the kids in the car).
@ddivine777511 ай бұрын
I absolutely experienced this and now have ptsd from being with a souless, heartless, disgustingly guilty hypocrisy narcissist! It is very hard for me to go grocery shopping thanks to the torture from my 15 years with that red headed demon! Danish you truly are an expert a great person for sharing your wisdom with everyone! I watch alot of different people's channels regarding narcissism and I have to say you are #1! Thank you!
@angelbennett6617 Жыл бұрын
My ex would start a fight with me before we would go out. That way, they had a reason to be distant, plus it made me act awkward and quiet in public.
@maevemaiden11 ай бұрын
My ex definitely used a similar tactic. It is disgusting to think I put up with this type of shit. They are the epitome of emotional manipulation.
@justwondering380011 ай бұрын
The narcissist's ability to disappear in public places is truly bizarre. One minute my husband would be there right next to me and the next he would be gone and I do mean gone. He could disappear without a trace. I could never figure out how he did it or where he went. Makes you feel crazy. That's the point.
@theliberatedplanet Жыл бұрын
My sister, when we would be anywhere publicly together, she would just either go into a panic attack at my very presence or anyone being interested in me or try to control and manipulate the whole situation whether it was through personal drama or just in general. I used to describe visiting her as being on a roller coaster and the only way to get away was to jump. Many people here will know what I'm talkin about. She has tried to destroy everything in my life from the very day I was born up until the present. I recently received the yearly postcard which had a different form of my name on it each time because she could never get my name right that is to let you know you're not worthy for them to really know your name or how you spell it or what you call yourself. This last one came on her birthday not mine and it had an apology LOL an apology for all the things she had done to me and they were many she said. She could not name one I promise you she could not admit to anything. Is just a last-ditch ploy to try and suck me in again. I checked the obit periodically knowing that if she's dead I'll never hear from her again. And it is her determination that I died first because how else could she be the winner? Is this not horribly sad and pathetic.
@sweetdreams311911 ай бұрын
So confusing to go anywhere with these demons. Walking behind, talking to anyone else but you, and yes, losing you in malls or shopping. So insecure, so needy for attention no matter where we were. If I appeared to be having fun, he'd make some rude comment to ruin it or claim he had to leave. No matter what type they are, they're all a disappointment.
@MariaKutchenriter-hs5xv Жыл бұрын
He would always walk ahead of me. One time I yelled across the parking lot hey who are you here with. And once in the grocery store this man could disappear like Houdini! I could just turn my head for a split second and he was gone. Never understood any of this until I learned about Narcissism 😊 8:44
@An-ux2fq Жыл бұрын
So true!! He was always lost in the grocery store and I had to search for him.
@douglasm8361 Жыл бұрын
Going anywhere with her was her chance to declare I was sending other women signals, I'm flirting with every woman and just using her to get other women. If I make eye contact with any one I was in trouble. She though if some woman smiled at her it was a signal to her that I was somehow cheating. Her super hyper awareness and paranoia made her think everyone was directing rude behavior to her. It goes back to her also making up lies so she could confuse the hell out of me over the simplest interactions. It was hell and drove me insane. I'd even tell her how much I hated going anywhere with her. And if I was having fun and happy, she'd destroy me and drag the longest fights out when she got me alone. Movies, concerts, super market, dog walks, rare outing with my friends. No escape till I ended it,
@hologramgrave Жыл бұрын
Funny thing is, my ex treated me like this (ignoring mean and invalidating) but now that he’s with someone else, he treats her differently. They walk side by side holding hands. He buys her gifts and flowers, they take trips. It’s so odd how they can change like a chameleon.
@lisacharvet2851 Жыл бұрын
Take heart, my dear!! It's only a matter of time. Soon, she too will suffer. They never change!!! He may still be in the love bombing stage. As soon as he's certain she's hooked, dependent on him, and she truly believes his fake persona, BAM! She'll get slapped in the face and knocked upside the head-(figuratively speaking)-and not even understand what happened!!! She'll be used, abused, criticized, (probably even compared to you! He will tell her all the wonderful things that you did. Might even say, “Why can't you be more like that?). I'm not even joking!! The mask comes off behind closed doors! And she's probably experiencing cognitive dissonance, not wanting to believe what her gut is telling her, just as you did. 😢 Don't bother trying to warn her. She wouldn't believe you anyway. But trust me when I say, she will suffer the same fate as you, if she's not already. Sad, but true.
@chantelbaldwin6862 Жыл бұрын
Every word of every sentence was 100% accurate in my experience with my ex narc
@tarey05 Жыл бұрын
Sadly and painfully true on all counts! Bittersweetly expressed, Danish. Thank u for reminding us. And congrats on reaching 80k subs!Your wise words are being heard by tens of thousands with many more to follow!
@lisacellini3516 Жыл бұрын
Agreed! Congrats Danish…and thank you!
@artfromsoul2166 Жыл бұрын
Truly said..they lack empathy.
@victoriakennedy4811 Жыл бұрын
yes - I think it is a real problem and you have helped me to understand what is going on with the walking ahead or behind me and also putting his hand on my shoulder and other weird things they do
@UGPVlogsLA Жыл бұрын
Last year when I unfortunately lost my house, and pretty much everything that was inside, my friends mother offered me a room to rent at her place. Little did I know at the time that I was walking into a wolf packs home. The entire family were a bunch of narcissists, the mother would lock me out on several occasions late at night, and she would NEVER give me a key to the front door. Yes, I paid her rent, bought food, cleaned her home, cooked dinner etc. it was so awful, just awful. It’s seriously effected how I feel about living with others. She even went as far as to opening my mail, what a bunch of disgusting human beings. Oh, another thing, in one of her fits of rage she smashed the back light on my car. I do have her on video, mainly just audio, I had a security camera set up in my room to protect myself, and since the walls were very thin, it picked up some of her explosive fits. When I listen back to some of the audio, it’s just lies coming out of her mouth about people who are so good to her and her family. What should I do? Expose her? Go to the people she has spread lies about? Can anyone give me some advice please 🙏
@triple999fruitful Жыл бұрын
You're intelligent and aware and have recorded criminal activity against you. Report this to the police. You don't need to be endangered nor paying fines for sabotage. Get help from domestic violence advisers for accommodation. I'm relieved for you that you can see and understand what is happening and have the energy to find a solution. You are strong and you will succeed. Take care.
@sonjacurry4473 Жыл бұрын
My advice would be to just get away from these people. They seem to have a knack of making you look like the crazy one. Because everyone sees them as the most wonderful person and people around. They will never change. Sorry to say that but I have dealt with that with my mother for years. The hard part is I can't get away from my mother. I just have to set boundaries and keep them. But that still doesn't stop her from the outburst of rage and victimhood and all the rest that goes with her crazy narcissistic patterns. Just get away as fast and as soon as you can.
@maevemaiden11 ай бұрын
Omg I lived this exact situation with my narc -ex and his family!!! I am so glad you got away. I was liberated earlier last month and I am never looking back. 🙏💕
@marmaladesunrise Жыл бұрын
You are so accurate about all of this. Yet it is so sad to see that I was that vulnerable to such a DOUCHE
@sharonparis8916 Жыл бұрын
Yes, when my spouse and I use to go to eat. I felt like there was no connection/nothing to talk about. It was just a matter of driving to the restaurant, being seated/served,eating the food and straight home for us to go out separate ways him one tv sports and me another tv sitcoms.
@brigittaspelthuis2343 Жыл бұрын
So true , all experienced . No contact since almost 2 years, after 16 years with him, still wondering all the time that he was and is a narcisst . Sometimes still wondering how high is score is in all points he is a narcissi and I am afraid I judge too much. He was and is really so covert but so mean and evil ....Thank you for your short but very clear contributions . So important work you do. I am healed but sometimes still shocked how that could happen to me for 16 years patchwork , and then a cold discard.
@CassiE.86_11 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for this video. My ex did all of those things, especially stare at other women, and when i would mention it, he would gaslight me, saying that he was looking at a picture on the wall or that I'm tripping. I stopped going places with him, and then it dawned on me, "Why the hell am i still with him?" I ended it shortly after that.
@Accuface2000 Жыл бұрын
True, you have real experience, good insights and knowledge of narcissistic behaviours that other KZfaqrs won't discuss. I have dated people who make you feel alone, it's exactly as you say, walking ahead and behind you, busy with everything and everyone except you. Acting like a popular person, greeting and smiling at random people including strangers. It's like she is signalling to the public that she doesn't trust you or know you, availing herself to new supply like somebody in an open relationship. Lucky enough, I don't invite such people to special events or introduce them to my friends. One day she was walking behind me in the shops from a faraway distance. As I got to the checkout point, an angry male shopper started shouting and belittling her for delaying the queue. I could have defended her but I decided not to. She just stood there embarrassed and humiliated, grinning like a fool 😂😂 Mark 8:38 "For whosoever is ashamed of me....I will also be ashamed of him."
@arielmarbury4678 ай бұрын
I used to practically run behind him. He walked fast to make it hard to keep up. He left me at parties alone. Always alone at gatherings, then he acted confused when I didn't want to go anymore. Then he started leaving me at home while he partied. It got worse once we had kids. I can't believe this is a thing! I wish I knew then what I know now. All his strange behavior summed up in these videos! This channel is gold!!!
@laurelmarshall6903 Жыл бұрын
This was 100% how my father behaved his whole life long. My dad would always grab my wrist & "lead me" or just grab my wrist while he was telling my something "important". You're right about walking ahead of me or behind me. My Daughter was a narc to & I experienced going to a grocery store with her in which the scenario you described in your video happened.
@maryspriggs8435 Жыл бұрын
In our 27 years of marriages, he has never shopped with me at the grocery store, but goes off by himself and ends up waiting for me at the exit or in the car. We go in together and I may turn to ask him about his preferences for meals, only to find that he has disappeared….
@背bせ11 ай бұрын
😂😂🤔🤷 oh dear, is the same... as a nightmare 🤦
@ladyloungealot5119 Жыл бұрын
This is so true! When I was a child, we lived in a small house. One Easter, my father's brother and his family and some other people arrived. My mother seated everyone as well as she could, including the precious first born daughter. In the end, there was no room for me, the scapegoat, only abt 8 yrs old. She made me to eat alone in the kitchen, and I got the really bad cuts of the turkey. Sounds impossible? It may, but it has happened. She was such a great hostess to everybody in order of importance.