"We are dangerous and most of us are on the edge of insanity, the only people that look normal to us are the people that we just met". This man is literally giving away free truth. I want to hug this man so bad T^T

"I love you, but I need to tell you about the cereal" - Alain de Botton, on the topic of love.

Every time I watch a video from this channel, I feel smarter. It's such a good escape from the typical, delicious internet filth we get caught up in so easily.

Alain de Botton makes me, simultaneously, want to get back together with my last girlfriend so I can repair and restart our relationship with everything he's taught me, and start over with someone else much more stable and suited to me and capable of receiving and reciprocating loving understanding. But one thing is for sure - Alain makes me feel much, much better about moving forward.

"Romanticism is the single greatest enemy we face against love"

_"When you manage to move from seeing your partner as an idiot to seeing your partner as a lovable idiot, you've learnt a vital lesson about love which we all need to take on board."_ ❤️🌻

best 19 minutes i've spent on youtube so far.

I was nodding my head so vigorously for almost the whole nineteen minutes that I thought my head was going to fall off

"They're a little bit too healthy, they didn't satisfy friends requirement for suffering."

2020. Who still comes here and feels this is super relevant? This man is a gem.

Man this dude liberated part of my soul

‘being yourself around another person is a curse we should spare anyone who we care about ’ 😂😂👍

He summed up all of his videos on romanticism in under 20mins, absolutely insane ;)

So this is what the narrator looks like!!

I feel like some of Alain's comedic tone here should make it into more videos. I really liked it.

The idea of being generous in one's "interpretation of the behaviors of the other person" (treating a partner as a child) is also known in relationship psychology as "positive illusions" and has been found to be a primary indicator of long-term relationship duration. Absolutely love this channel and this video is one of my favorites to date. Thank you for your work Alain.

Alain De Botton is gorgeous and smart. I am embarrassed to comment here but I have a major crush on him.

This man's every word, he speaks, should be written in double comma's.

Some people say we only use 10% of our brains. I think we only use 10% of our hearts.

This should be taught in schools! Or at least played.

Anyone else wish they could "come to him later" when he address the crowd.

finally the gorgeous voice uncovered

5 mins in & thinking this guy is BRILLIANT (& funny, too)

I find this very effective in general: "let's stop treating our partners as adults and start treating them like little children" I believe people respond to kindness better than they do to demanding or criticism

this is really what it means to love: to be generous in the interpretation of the behavior of another person

As with most things in life, balance is key. Basing love off romantic feelings only will not be enough, and using a completely rational approach is also not enough. You need both. The intuition/feeling and your ration. I have been in both types of relationships: guided by ration and guided by feeling. Something was missing in both, and I believe mainly it was a balance between these two approaches to a relationship.

My new ice breaker for any conversation, "So... How are you mad?" Thanks Alain!

I never want his videos to end so I pause and go away and come back to them to feel like it’s longer

Alain, I'm sure you would drive me absolutely mad in real life, but in these metered doses, you are completely BRILLIANT. I can't tell you how many ways you have helped me get out of entrenched areas of thought. I've been listening to School of Life videos every day since a friend sent me the one on appreciation of short term love. Can't believe I learned of you a month after you were here at Powell's World of Books. Hope you loved Portland enough to come back. =)

I love how after all this time following the channel, watching these long form content I can pick up points that were established in previous videos, sometimes multiple times, even dated back to the very beginning. You should definitely do more of these. They are fun as hell.

Sure as hell wish someone had told me this when I was in high school - and insisted on my watching it once a year until I could recite it from memory.

He speaks so fast yet his message his very clear and elaborate. I like his way of explaining things that intermittently involves humour

Thank you Alain for everything. your existence in this life will never be forgotten. you are one of the very few philosophers I truely believe in. your message have reached me all the way to Saudi Arabia ! can you imagine! I love you and I love your work..i just feel more at ease and calm about life the more i watch The School of Life videos :) and often times i find myself going to the Book Of Life just to read even more :) you rock ! the coolest philosopher ever ♡

My god! This is such an amazing talk. Wow...

Dear Alain De Botton - one of today's best thinkers and actually I think he is a genius. So underrated. Love him.

Where has this man been all of my life?? Wow! He is just right about everything. We have so many expectations of perfection on love that it ruins relationships.

OMG that broken arm/broken soul example was so good. :D

Love is about hard work and when you get older you realize this, compassion and kindness are key

Alain de Botton is a marvelous combination of both intelligence and humor. 😊

This is resonates so much with how I feel on a daily basis in my relationship. It's just a shame that my husband doesn't understand or use a lot of this and it's so unbelievably tiring to be the "emotional adult" in all of this and constantly forgive what I know he does not understand. That being said, Alain always reminds me of a somewhat balder version of Prince William.

12:00 Greeks vision of love 18:40 readiness for love: you are crazy, your partner is crazy You don't understand yourself, They don't understand themeselves

Absolutely brilliant. I am very happy that i understood a lot of this from past experiences. I learned that my "instinct" was going to lead me to be unhappy and be miserable in my marriage. When i met my wife, i didn't "click" with her or feel intensely towards her. I looked at her as a person, outside of the conext of my feelings and saw an amazing human being, 3 years later, i am happier than i have ever been in my life and i love her more and more everyday, and it feels like healthy love, the kind of love that builds you up and makes you a better person, not the kind of love that is self destructive like the "love" we have towards someone we instinctly feel comfortable with in the beginning.

His talks are relieving. Romanticism puts too much pressure on us.

"Because this is really what it means to love, which is to be generous in the interpretation of the behaviour of another person." I love this phrase. So true. Some was a bit messy in this speech, but this quote really reached me.

Want more Videos like this.

"didn't fit my pattern of madness..."

Watching this confirms that I'm not romantic since I already agree with and practice what he's saying about the future of love. 🙌

I love his wisdom and insight- and such a crisp presentation! Thank you!

So organized, so concise, and so helpful! Amazing job

This lecture makes me feel so relaxed inside. Don’t have to search like madness to my twinsoul, it is as good as it gets and it is the same with everyone else.

Alain thank you for this tribute to love! Wonderful and revealing plenty of simple but precious truths.

Like always Alain delivers it masterfully

I don't think any other video has contributed so much to understanding and improving relationships than this one. I know the quality of my relationships (romantic and platonic) have changed post the wisdom of Alain and I'm sure it's the similar for many others. Emotional education is so underrated these days. Kudos to sharing such quality content! 👏

I absolutely love listening to Alain. Such refreshing takes and he presents them in an even more refreshing way. Had a smile on my face the entire time, I even applauded at the end!

Just brilliant, brilliant! Thank you so much Alain!

Alain thank you so much for your wonderful lecture! Indeed, you are a genius.

This deserves so many more views. Absolutely brilliant!

Brilliant exposé on what love is, how to find it, how to know when you've found it, and how to maintain it. I learned so much from your teachings Alan. Cheers!

Intellectual and emotional genius. How inspiring. Thank you.

Just fantastic! I love your point of view Alan and you have articulated it so well. I wish I knew this when I was younger!

This is such an important video for so many millenials / gen y. I agree with so much of what's discussed. It's also refreshing to hear an insight of as to what parts of these ideologies are healthy /unhealthy and why

I so very much want to watch this right now, but I'm seeing Alain speak in Sydney in 2 months on this very topic, so I don't want to ruin it by hearing it early!

What a great public speaker and a truly fascinating rendition of modern ‘love’ ... thank you 🙏!!

Alain is absolutely brilliant!

I feel so engaged when I hear Alain de botton speak.

This whole channel is so awesome! Thank you so much! keep up the good work

I love the originality of your content and delivery in all of the School of Life videos! Thank you!

It's taken me a lifetime to recognize these things....so much brilliance in less than 20 minutes

My face lit up 10 seconds into the video connecting his voice with the other school of life videos. I finally have a face to the voice

Thank you for a wonderful introduction to your ideas! I really enjoyed it and couldn't agree more. Delivered with just the right amount of humour!! Sharing with my teenage boys hope it help puts 'things' into perspective for them nice and early. 😀

This was beautiful, his explanation was spectacular.

I love how simple and matter of fact you are able to educate. You're videos are so great, I've loved everyone I've seen!

Romanticism has ruined love! I love this video and your insights on love and beyond. I only regret I didn't hear all of this sooner!

I have never written a comment on any video. But this one is truly amazing. This man is speaking heavenly words. Some of us never really understand what love is, we remain sad, broken hearted, bothered, but don't really question the idea of false love we have sewed in our heads. We should really learn how to love openly and beyond the predefined boundaries.

I'm in awe of his brilliance ~ and his irresistible sense of humor. And his sparkling, all-knowing eyes. :) Thanks for posting !!!

Incredibly poignant yet lighthearted. LOVE this!!

I think disney also has fault, they set this principles on little girls.

Goodness gracious. Never heard anyone speak the truth and say it in such an elegant way. I feel like he just opened closet to a whole bunch of hidden things I have contemplated but never wanted to say. This is both refreshing and frightening to listen to because I know listening to his speech is changing my perspective in a profound way.

Thanks for shining a light on love!! Bravo!

That's one of the best talks I've ever heard.

He’s serving up gems 💎. Familiarity rarely equals happiness.

Francois La Rochefoucauld - 'There are some people who would never have fallen in love if they had not heard there was such a thing.'

Alain, thank you so much, you are feeling my gaps with light. I would love if one day I would have the chance to help you with your work. This presentation was sublime.

Love listening to Alain,makes some complicated material very easy to listen to and learn from,keep it up Sir.

The comment on criticism tragically does not only effect couples but teacher and student relationships. Students will threaten a teachers job because their criticism is too harsh, then parents will also support the childs or young adults point of view instead of the educators perspective on the topic which is the correct one. I have seen threats in American schools and I have sadly seen a teacher lose their job In Bolivia. The reactions seen in social media outlets on how some people consider themselves bullied because they are being criticized of their incorrect thoughts is exactly how students react to teachers criticism. "You are too harsh on my beliefs so you are unfit to educate me". I would like to add that I greatly appreciate and enjoy this channel and its contents, although I am not well versed with poets and philosophers; these videos give a thorough and easily digested amount of information. More than enough to grasp ones interest to seek for more. Keep up the good work Alain and hopefully you will be able to keep presenting and be able to upload those as well. For those who can not make it. A huge Thank You from a student in Virginia and some alumni.

This is literally the best video I've ever stumbled upon!

Most illuminating speech I ever heard. Thank you!

Phenomenal on every level. Bravo! Love.

Suddenly recognising you have a mutual chemistry with someone and wanting to step out together somewhere peaceful in Nature is ageless. A great many couples already have this all down pat and are happily getting along with their lives. I agree with a lot of his points but I think it depends on the kind of person you are also. Some people thrive in relationships and others don't fit or life gets in the way. Many of my friends are partnered up and happy living their lives without any mind for this type of thinking. Maybe they had more stable parents

We need more people like Alain de Botton in our society - people that are upfront about the challenges that we will confront whilst we journey through life. I sincerely hope the School of Life continues to grow and that more and more people can find solace and comfort in knowing that there are others out there that understand the ups and downs of existence. Bravo Alain!

WOW WOW WOW, what a brilliant speech, loved everything he said, and gave me epiphany.

We need more people like you in this world.

Sir the words you say rip out of my own mind. love your simplicity on explaining complex things.

Amazing! This is like a crash course in how to love for the modern world! Everything he says hits the nail on the head, this should be required viewing. I would enjoy seeing videos focusing more on the new platform of dating and romance (the Internet) and how it seems to be skewing our romantic ideals and standards. (in fact you guys may have done that already). Anyway well done all around for the work you guys do. This channel remains the one I constantly go back to and I refer to it as the education of the soul. De Botton is a genius!

What a spectacular insightful masterful teacher! You were born born for this life lesson. Thank you for sharing your insight and perspective.

Wow Alain, great moves! Keep it up! Proud of you.

This was a heart breakingly informative stand up comedy

"How are you mad", well my younger brother keeps a list, so I can just redirect her to him.

Absolutely Brilliant, as usual Mr. Botton. And Thank You So Much for the U.S. Shop!!!

Thank you for this truth and sense of humor about the most intense of human feelings.