He literally strawmanned his way out of an auction

This entire game feels like an insanely elaborate shitpost.

"You want someone to celebrate your birthday with you this year?" "Granted." That was unexpectedly wholesome.

There isn’t a single joke in this video. Every line in the script is not only something you can do in this game, but most of it is encouraged and some of it is straight up necessary to move forward.

Is this that Genshin Impact everyone is talking about?

This is how John Cena learned how to speak chinese

Having already owned this game, I watched this video and was inspired to go back. I just wanted to note: the Big Chungus sentient spirit thing? That's not actually a joke. Sseth is being completely serious. The name you give an awakened building or item DOES actually decide part of the stats it gets, and a male spirit being named "Big Chungus" will give base stats of 26 which is either the highest possible base stat value, or just the highest one that has been found. This is reproducible across saves and games. fuckin wild.

If anyone wants to play this in 2023 or later, the English version has been improved a lot. There is now mod support and 2 DLCs, and a great sequel is in the works. Update: There's also a mobile port of the game! It's only available in China, but it should be coming to the West soon.

This...this isnt even a game anymore. This is homework.

Meng Hao walked into the McDonald's. The cultivator taking his order gave a derisive snort, but Meng Hao did not really care, because he had repressed his aura down to the Single Patty Realm, and a fool would not be able to tell his true level of burger eating. "Give me... a Happy Meal!" The cultivator's face flickered before he finally regained his composure and laughed. "You couldn't afford a Happy Meal. Get lost! Don't you see that there are Double Quarter Pounder Realm eaters waiting behind you? Meng Hao slapped his bag of holding and threw 80 billion spirit McDonald's coupons onto the counter, causing an earthquake which demolished half of the restaurant. Everyone dropped their jaws. None could see how this was possible! "I'll take that Happy Meal with a side order of fries, " Meng Hao said. He was as calm as the ocean in a painting of an insanely calm ocean. "And let me see your manager!" The cashier cultivator coughed up a mouthful of ketchup. He simply could not handle Meng Hao's killing intent, because he was only at the Quarter Pounder with Cheese realm himself. Even though Meng Hao had suppressed his aura, because he had cultivated the Heavenly Burgin' Qi, this was enough to kill people a few levels higher if he truly wanted. It was then that another man which a much more fierce aura stepped forward. "You dare make trouble here?" "P... Patriarch Hamburglar!" Patriarch Hamburglar was 99 cents of the way into the Big Mac Realm, plus tax! Meng Hao was pushed back two feet, knocking over a soda machine. Powerade Mountain Berry Blast geysered outward, killing several onlookers. Of course, Mayor McCheese saw all this happen through the window. Meng Hao coughed up a mouthful of blood, snorted, constricted his pupils, and then his expression went calm. He unleashed the aura of 64 patties, condensed down to a 2 patty stack that could fit into his mouth! Mayor McCheese coughed up a mouthful of cheese. His pupils constricted. "Is this... Seeking the McRib stage??" Meng Hao had the gentle air of a scholar, but it wouldn't stop him from killing several people in a McDonald's. "Burger Devouring Scripture! I'm Lovin' It!" With the first keyword of the Burger Devouring Scripture, everyone below the early Quarter Pounder With Cheese stage exploded into purple mist. The light of the immense heavenly burger shone down with the contours of a golden arch as 9 illusory burgers floated around Meng Hao's body, which is probably an important xianxia number that matches the number of lakes in some sacred Chinese province I've never heard of. But that was only a fraction of Meng Hao's power. He waved his arm, bringing forth thirty more cultivation techniques that hadn't appeared in over 400 chapters! "Heavenly Tribulation Fries! Eastern Everburning Egg McMuffin! Fruit Smoothie Guillotine! Soul McCafe Mocha Incarnation!" Meng Hao's expression was the same as ever as he slapped his bag of holding, and brought out his karmic ketchup packet, Fry Cook Lord medallion, seventeen different wooden time spatulas, a five-coloured resurrection coupon, the silk burger wrapper, various souls of lightning McNuggets that he may or may not still have, and his mask of the legacy of Ronald McDonald. Oh, and the image of a flying Chicken Snack Wrap dragon appeared. Remember that? It was basically his Main Thing at the start of the novel, but quietly faded into irrelevance. Until now! All of this takes some time to describe, but actually happened in the space of only a few breaths. "What! Impossible!" Meng Hao wanted to summon the parrot as well, but it was too overcome with eroticism by the purple fur depicted on a nearby poster of Grimace, and was busy drilling out a glory hole straight through the poster, and the wall it was pinned to, with its strong parrot erection. But it was more than enough. The Hamburglar's soul flew out and was absorbed into his mask! He screamed as his body was destroyed completely. Meng Hao brushed off his robe and swept up his spirit coupons and everyone's bags of holding which probably didn't have any cool sh*t inside unless I write him into a corner later, and anyways, don't worry about it for now. He surveyed the rubble that was all that remained of the McDonald's. "Guess I'll be taking that Happy Meal... to go!"

Seth sending a fake body double to scam the auction is the single best game mechanic I've ever witnessed

"I'm under arrest, but I'm not, because I'm a mannequin Made of straw." -Tzenntch, 2021

The best part is, this entire video is more useful than the entire fucking wiki

不要伤害我, 我可以破坏当地的电网

The Yaoguai thing is actually hilarious too. So, Tribulations happen to any cultivator that really tries to go hard in the paint on ascending. and Yaoguai tribulation is basically the easiest one. It burns through 30k Qi, 5 times, at base. This means you have to be able to tank 150k Qi of damage. A cultivator that just became an inner disciple has between 500 to 1200 Qi. This plus good artifacts in the first couple months could get you to 1500 Qi in the disciple, and 30k Qi in artifacts and other pools of Qi they can use. This will not save you. If you have a Yaoguai with under 100 days before tribulation, they're a lost cause if they aren't already an established cultivator, or you're willing to play like a psychopath. So my first attempt at The Miao Haus ended in terror. MY next attempt just has the Miao family and their many, many, mundane cats.

The moral of the story is that Chinese fantasy is like Western fantasy, if instead of being refined by masters of their craft, and ruthlessly polished into a shining little gem by the constraints of fantasy gaming, everyone just did drugs and watched martial arts movies, and then recordings of their drug-addled ramblings were input into a machine to convert into a genre of fiction.

I’ve read too many wuxia novels.. this game completely makes sense to me. What have I become..

It's like an AI generated this game after learning random Chinese myths and downing a bottle of Jägermeister.

After reading more cultivation novels/manhuas than a computer can count, I have long come to the conclusion that cultivation trades brains and maturity for sheer power. The number of times I have read about people gasping in shock and amazement because the MC was smart enough to know that the guy who threatened him and his family with torture and the eternal imprisonment of their souls might not be trustworthy is... Not to mention all the times they have been AMAZED that someone as YOUNG as 2-3000 years can understand basic sarcasm and 'subtle' threats.... As the characters themselves have stated: 'Even million+ year old legends might not have been able to detect the animosity shown by (guy known for killing everyone who does not bow and scrape before him, or just anyone he sees when he is in a malicious mood.)'

9:05 Oh I see, that's why my parents got divorced, the bedroom was in orientation 5, which is clearly incorrect Feng Shui, dooming their relationship!

"Heaven's punishment for being a furry" is a sentence that I did not expect to describe Heavenly tribulations accurately.

Good ending: Sseth wasn't Mcaffe'd.

Sometimes i like to come back to this video because i cannot hold on to a single bit of info about this game whatsoever so it's an entirely new viewing experience every time

“I only answer bad prayers” followed by him hesitantly granting the person who just wanted company on there bd always hits for some reason

"Luckily, this is a fantasy game. So the sound of women is optional."

Turtle man: “Hrm, today I will refine brownstone” *dies from starvation*

Kudos to whoever made this game. It must've taken a *really* long time.

Introduction to Yaoguai 2:30 Beginning 3:36 Sect introduction 4:18 Feng Shui Introduction 7:35 Chinese alchemy system 7:50 The main goal 9:20 Xiandao cultivation 10:01 Shendao cultivation 12:04 Physical cultivation 13:05 Chinese alchemy 14:43 Pets 15:38 Sect reputation 16:52 Talismans 17:10

This game is literally just the "very wise" and "very unwise" memes turned into a colony sim.

I like how Seath is so deep into the mechanics of this game he forgot to explain what the golden core actually does.

"Keep in mind, this IS a fantasy game, so the sound of women is optional" Oh my fucking God. Best thing I've heard all year.

"Fuck , my man is literally shitting himself. This is one intense Breakthrough." LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

"A man just decapitated my best friend from 10 miles away with a flying fedora." Hate it when that happens in rimworld.

Guys, Seth was never gone, he was just optimizing his Feng Shui and cultivating himself into a higher state of being. Chill out

came back to watch this life changing masterpiece, the best 30 minutes of my life, went from a broke and disabled person to a demigod thank you ccp

Renaming the dog "Dinner" since it was a little more Chinese KILLED me. Thanks for the vid.

Bought this the day it came out, started the game with a single character, realized very quickly that without any outer disciples to put to work I was pretty fucked, managed to get some outer disciples and soon after came to the conclusion: "This isn't a game for me, it's a game for Sseth, I'll just wait for his video on it."

"Someone drawed a swastika and now can use the oven 12% faster" This is some Kung Fury level of martial arts

As someone who got into xianxia books and tv shows in the last 6 months im laughing my ass off and i am gonna play the shit out of this. Honestly the genre is funny cause it full of people trying to cultivate immortality, but also theyre the fucking pettiest human beings imaginable. So this game carries the spirit of the genre pretty well lol

the cultivation novels genre, the one genre where being childish is a sign of strength.

This is what I imagine high level elders scrolls lore is like.

I do want to say that despite several years of continued research, Big Chungus continues to be one of the best names for sentient objects. I didn't want to know this, but I'm too far in. Help me.

"We have to trick villagers into joining our ranks. We do this by making small talk, find out that half of them like nothing more than to consume shit, then invite them over" [17:38] _T H E L O A T H S O M E D U N G E A T E R_

returning with "Cultivation Simulator" makes too much sense

What I've learnt is that Sseth spent the last 2 months learning to say Feng Shui correctly

3:54 Sseth saying "Whom'st did this" button

rewatching sseth's entire filmography because life has lost all meaning and it's one of the few things that make me feel alive

This video phisically exhausted me. The sheer outlandish and intricate systems information dump numbed me for days to come. I can't even fathom the work that was put into this video. Giant Kudos Seth! And thank you!

I bought this game when it came out. I played it for 20 hours and still didn't understand anything. Now that I've watched this video I can safely say it's not my fault and this game is an afront to god

12:45 that is honestly so cute.

This is my favorite video of yours, I could never play autism games like these and this one especially is very interesting with the Chinese culture and lore. I come back to watch it every now and then

that part where he sent a doll to the auction house so he couldn't get caught really was funny and made my jaw drop. Those games may not be for me, but i'm glad they exist

"Are you easily entertained by seeing numbers get higher?" still waiting on a runescape video

and everyone in a cultivator story just yelling at you COURTING DEATH!

I'd love to see a game that take the concepts here and makes it into something where you're an individual on a cultivation journey, instead of the seed point for an entire sect

I think i broke the code now. He gets addicted to a game, plays it for 500+hours, then he gets an injection of seratonin and forces himself to make some high quality content.

"a competitive salary of $0" and "they're not slaves" just sounds like grad-school all over again.

How is this actually the funniest video on the whole site? I've watched it like 10 times and it's absolutely killing me. It's Perfect.

The dog destroying everything is so relatable. I have a husky puppy rn and she not only has the same look on her face, but she told me she wants to feed people laxatives because destroying everything in my house just doesn't cause enough chaos

The new DLC has pills that cures perpetual child face and can make your 14 year old boy look like Master Roshi.

“Completely geriatric” *shows Mike stoklasa* I love it

10:55 this entire segment just..... perfection.

I think I've watched this video like 5 times. Fantastic comfort watch

"Are you easily entertained by seeing numbers get higher" Damn, you got me

Was getting real worried that the Merchan'ts Guild™ took you out, Sseth

This helps me understand the Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation far better than that series does

the way sseth runs a sect is more or less equivalent to actual wuxia sects lmao

Jeez this game is basically a crash course into Chinese mysticism.

Gods, I've been trying to watch so many of those Cultivation Series that keep coming out of China, but none of them really work as well as the story Seth put into this...mostly because the protags of those series all act EXACTLY like he does here, and still think their the good guys. Meanwhile Seth is aware of being a bastard.

This game goes even deeper than he got into with this full 30+ minute video my god. It's so good

"Xiandao, Shendao, and Physical" Why is this so funny

This is the only review where every 3 minutes I question if this is really a game or some sort of long con/fever dream.

"You courted death" 10/10 video. This truly is cultivation right here.

So... even though this game seems to have mechanics many may call convoluted and unnecessary, and a certain brutality to the mental gymnastics within the gameplay... I can't deny the absolute masterpiece that is the potential to decapitate someone using a magical flying detached human penis, one of many within the penis bartering economy.

"The Sound of women is optional" Oh my god

This is the most esoteric game I've ever seen. Compared to that Rimworld looks like a perfectly normal, regular game.

Sometimes, there are things that best left alone instead of learn it at the risk of getting insomnia.... This whole cultivation thing is stronger than my usual coffees

This game is a trip man, took me hours just to understand how to make a single cultivator reach GC1, And once I had finally achieved it, I immediately got the dragon event and didn't know how the hell to take it down Haven't played the game since so any advices are welcomed

Oh God, the clone in the auction house had me tearing up with laughter, holy shit.

“Sseths videos have become ad friendly.” *laughs in +12% faster ovens*

Sseth's magnum opus, behold the most rewatchable video on the internet

in the videos of sseth's i've seen so far he manages to turn every game into a hussle, organ harvesting operation, warcrimes central, or all 3 at once.

This game makes quantum physics look like preschool topic

I know I'm never gonna play this game, but the video still made me want to.

That laxative cultivation method is hilarious

Alright it's 2023. Time for that sequel video

You can tell that Sseth actually tried with his pronunciations, which is awesome. Also, Chinese mysticism is the final boss of "contrived plot armour and maguffins" so its insane to see the developers made some semblance of a system out of it

The legend returned

I came here explicitly for a crash course on Feng Shui so I could make my castle in conan exiles better

22:00 - 22:24 literally the plot of Mo Dao Zu Shi

This is one of the most insane games Sseth hast covered and that's saying something.

the second I heard the phrases 'courting death' and 'jade like childhood friend' I almost had a fit.

Just one more year until amazing cultivation simulator 2

I've watched this video 4 times now. Honestly, this is the best script I've ever heard. Keep the content coming!

Honestly, using an enchanted, flying piece of fabric to decapitate your enemies sounds completely badass.

The King returns 👑👑

5:10 Considering the way cultivators act in Xianxia novels... yeah that's about right

He wasn't gone, he was just.... Suffering

How to make the Amazing Treasure Sect 1. Get a male cultivator to learn Lunar Form, this will give you a treasure. 2. Regrow body part and repeat for infinite treasure, then go to step 3. 3. Use primordial skill "Darksoul Genesis" to illuminate the treasures into sentinel spirits 4. Awaken the sentinel spirits and cultivate them 5. Now you are ready to take over the world with your amazing treasures

Love the RLM reference at 1:33 . Warms my heart to know you watch those guys