Before you fall into depression you feel like you're trying to keep together a structure that's made out of old rotten planks and cracked beams. And you're desperately struggling to keep the whole thing from caving in under your feet. And once it all breaks down and you stand there in the dirt with nothing you feel awful but at least now you've been given the opportunity to replace everything with new fresh strong materials. Sometimes I almost feel like you "need" to hit rock bottom because that thing was rotten and was gonna fall apart sooner or later, the only way to build was to tear it down and start again.

the more I've "transitioned" the closer to God I become..totally feel u bro...very proud of u..keep walking in faith..the light only shines brighter☺✌

Can I please like this 1,000 times? Ever since I watched his video "Transgender Suicides are Murders: Your Life is Worth Living" and hearing his story, I have been so fascinated with his growth not only physically, but spiritually too. One of my best friends is trans ftm as well and that's actually how I came across this channel a while back. And to watch the videos back then, not watch any videos for a while, and then come back a couple of months later really shows how much Ashton has matured as a result of being who he is. You're an inspiration Ashton!!! Congratulations on your progress on your journey thus far and I hope you realize that you have the power to be everything that you want to be!

I don't want this to sound critical of other videos but it's refreshing watch one about life. Yes, the ones about physical changes,relationships,how-to's are great. But I really appreciate knowing there is someone else who is looking to their spiritual side. Just because I am leaving one body behind for a different looking one, my soul is still the same. Thank you,Ashton...you are wise beyond your years. Keep listening to your inner peace( I call this the Holy Spirit)and continue to share with us.

I love your videos so much man they always make me think. You always have very refreshing points of view and I love it. Personally I don't believe in god or anything but I get what you mean about feeling closer to the universe because of transition. My trans identity has forced me to become more self actualized and self aware than I would've ever been in a million years if I was cis. Being trans has made me get to know myself on a level that I didn't even know was possible. Because of this I get to be an actual real person now instead of some skewed concept of a girl that only ever really existed inside other peoples' heads. I don't think cis people really realize the intensity of transitioning. The immense amount of trauma and suffering that most trans people go through, or how spiritual it can be, or how much of a persons life it can take up, none of that is ever really talked about.

Hey Ashton, While I don't personally believe in a God (nothing against those that do), I can definitely appreciate the core of what you say in this video and have definitely experienced my own version of this. I also want to say that it has meant a lot to see so many others, including yourself, opening up about their experiences - both good and bad - relating to gender and transitioning so thank you for doing what you do!

I so appreciate you talking about your faith/spirituality in regards to your transition. When coming out to myself (in terms of sexuality, and then gender later) the most difficult part was figuring out how my beliefs and my experience come together to form my Truth. I grew up Lutheran and was definitely a believer, and am now a practicing Unitarian Universalist. I identify as agender and I really discovered that and accepted that through my spiritual practices. My spirit and mind know no gender, and my biological sex is what it is. It's so frustrating that people, religious or not, see a "woman" when they look at me. I just want to be seen as a person. Even if/when I present in a more feminine way. (The institution of gender has made it so the clothing that best fits my body is labeled "feminine" so....ugh.) Anyway, I love what you're doing here and I wish you the best on your spiritual journey.

YES Ashton you're so handsome. My birthday is tomorrow and it always makes me reevaluate my life and everything I've been through. I had everything against me ex. my family, religion, finances... but in my heart I knew I had to make the change. Not for anyone else but for my happiness on the inside! I would have been killed myself without making the transition so it's easily the best decision of my life.

you're a real inspiration Ashton. Thank you for all of your videos. I'm getting very close to getting my hormones (March next year) And I love watching your videos and hearing what you have to say about all of this.

Very beautiful. You are growing into your own Humanity, and this is only a beginning! Congratulations.

This resonated with me so much, thank you so much for sharing.

I love how you make meaningful videos! it really impacts people 👍💕

Beautiful video. Thank you for sharing. 😊

wow he is so good-looking i'm so jealous -_-

Totally agree with you about, it's not about the body! Because it's true, we are not the body! I am a Self Realization Fellowship member. So it's all about finding God with in yourself! You should check it out, I feel the path you are on, it would be a good fit! :-)

I wish to transition but im too scared

nice😊😊😊

You are so handsome! (sorry if thats totally creepy lol) but its true!

I'm a gay guy and think you are absolutely adorable and would totally hook up with you.

check your insta DMs?