Did you ever notice that the people who DEMAND an exception to a rule are usually the reason the rule was made in the first place?

The fact that that one lady's ex husband left her because she's infertile and her brother is holding that over her head is disgusting. Girl, cut them off

I didn’t know “rainbow babies” were a thing. I was just super grateful to have a healthy baby after my miscarriage. It never occurred to me that he had a life-long pass to demand special treatment, which is probably why he grew up to be a respectful, responsible adult.

This actually happens to me. It was my cousin's wedding, and she asked me to help her, so I agreed. I designed her wedding invitation, I did their prenup photoshoot, and I provided for everything from her hair and make-up to her clothes. I became a singer at her reception; she also asked me to take photos and record video for documentation and I did everything for FREE. I was so stressed out that day. After a few days, she asked me for the photos, and I told her to come to my house and bring a flash drive because it was easier to transfer the photos directly from the laptop to a flash drive. By the way, I am from the Philippines, so the Internet connection here is very slow and unstable, and I am really busy and have to attend my class from 7 AM to 9:30 PM. She kept bugging me for the photos for days, and I said, "Please just go to my house so I can transfer the photos to your flash drive, and it will be easier." But she said that it was tiring to go out of her house. And then I found out that she was slandering me , and I was pissed, so I deleted all her photos.

I would like to stress that Paul and wife have a miracle baby and SHAMED the bride for being unable to have kids. Not only the audacity but also the empathy of this couple is unbelievable

That brother who said his sister is jealous because she can’t have kids is heartless and if my brother ever said anything like that, I would cut him out of my life completely.

I went to a child free wedding, but the bride arranged for a seperate party at a local childcare centre staffed by the childcare staff and the kids loved it they didn't have to dress up, no speeches and pizza party instead of "adult" food. Seriously getting my nephew to leave their party was difficult even though he was tired. Ages 0-13.

I'm a photographer and when I did my first wedding, I thought like "Okay, everybody is starting to eat, I'll take a break" but the lovely couple called me and offered me a seat in one of the tables to serve me food and water. That was so cute! Specially coming from strangers. I can imagine that guy who was prohibited to seat and eat or drink, that's so terrible.

If the bride and groom say the wedding is a CHILD FREE wedding, it’s going to be a CHILD FREE wedding. Whether you like it or not (and it’s not even the brother’s or anyone else’s wedding besides the bride and groom) follow the rules of the wedding. Plain and simple. Don’t like it? Then don’t come.

That photographer one is actually worse than it sounds. She was a guest, chose her food already, and when she agreed to do photos the couple REMOVED her from the guest list, which included her food and seat. I would delete.

I feel so bad for the bride who has a family that cares so little about her that they’re willing to ruin her day over the attendance of a “rainbow baby”. Losing a baby is devastating, but the baby should not be treated like a god. As the bride pointed out with no other children there her nephew would be bored and the event certainly isn’t something he’d remember but the bride WILL remember how badly her family treated her.

The rainbow baby one really got me, that one’s ridiculous. My second son is our rainbow baby. We lost his sister 24 weeks into the pregnancy and I delivered her twin brother at 39 weeks. One year later we found out we were having our rainbow and he was born on the anniversary of his sister’s death. So this is coming from a person who understands what having a rainbow baby is all about… but if I am invited to a child-free wedding my kids are just going to a sitter. 🤷🏻‍♀️ If the baby had been a newborn I would understand not wanting to leave them with somebody while spending the night out, but the child is four years old. The parents are probably insanely overprotective and spoil the hell out of that kid. This is your sister‘s wedding, this isn’t about you or your kid. Grow the f up.

How to solve the "child free" wedding situation: book the wedding at an 18+ venue. Then you don't have to deal with the rule-breakers when they show up with the kid and won't be allowed in.

Re: The 'Rainbow child' story, that kid is going to grow up to be an absolute monster of entitlement and selfishness. The family are wrecking his future.

** We offer same sex marriage ceremonies only. Jackie needs to proofread her ads. That note sounds exactly what Mike was looking for

My Italian head almost spun off my shoulders to hear that the photographer/friend wasn’t offered food and a drink at the wedding! What kind of shitty people are the bride and groom? I wouldn’t have deleted the photos but I would’ve left immediately and emailed them to say when they pay the regular fee for wedding photography, they can have their pictures.

Okay let's also talk about how the brother and his wife struggled to have a baby and still use the brides infertility against her

I can totally see dad & grandma calling Harvard, to see why kid didn’t get in “But he’s a rainbow baby, he’s special! He HAS to go to Harvard, you need to make an exception!” 🤦‍♀️

My cousin had a child free wedding, so I couldn't come. It did hurt me, because we were very close and she was my favorite cousin. I was 12 at that time, not really a kid to be fair, but anyways there were no questions from me or my parents. Until later when I found out that there were a lot of kids from the groom's side. Even babies... And not because their parents brought them, but they all were invited. I called her and said that she is not invited to my future wedding 😅 And that I won't talk to her ever again. She tried to call me, then tried to reach me through my mom, to say how much she loves me. But I believe she just didn't want to upset my mom who is her godmother and always gave her money when she asked for it and expensive gifts, used to take her to our family trips. Our relationship was ruined forever. It's been more 15 years now. Of course I started to talk to her as the time passed, but I talk to her only when I really have to. On weddings or funerals. And if I ever have a wedding she is still not invited.

$250 for 10 hours of wedding photography is an insult. That couple was all the way wrong. And yeah I would have deleted them too.

That woman and her fiance should stick to their guns and not let the nephew come to their childfree wedding, period! It's *their* wedding!

I'm sorry but if someone say "this wedding is child free", that wedding is child free. And that's it, there's no more questions or explanation about it

Photographer here. I would have done the same. This is the problem with having a photog that is damn good and a friend that REALLY wants a free wedding shoot. I pretty much quit because after so many free weddings . . I was fed up. That said, I was fed at each wedding I photographed. One wedding, the very grateful mother of the groom chased me down 2 times to go and eat! It is common practice as well as courtesy to feed your photographer! A wedding can take 8 - 12 hours of your time! 📷

For the "deleting wedding photos one"- I'd take that one to court. They wanted someone to work a full shift without food, water, or breaks on a really hot day. I feel like they're breaking some kind of law. While I also would have kept the photos hostage, I totally understand that photographer's reaction. But for real. Take it to court. I really think they were committing a crime here.

No, even if your rainbow child is shooting rainbows out of his bottom, he still does not get to come!

The fact that her brother said she was jealous bc she can’t have kids was horrible. I think her whole family not going bc of this situation is ridiculous.

My husband is listening to this while doing his own thing and he pipes in, "can we just never go to anyone's wedding?"

Childless wedding means NO CHILDREN no matter how spoiled and entitled the child and parents are. Her family is in the wrong and this breaks my heart for her. Some venues have strict no children rules as well (I know I've worked at a few).. I am curious how things turned out

"bride asks if she's wrong for not allowing a child to attend her child-free wedding" NO. I didn't even need to hear the rest of the story. She's not wrong. If your wedding is child free, then that's that. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I feel bad for her that her family did that to her.

I'm so sorry for the bride in the child free wedding post. I can't wrap my head around how cruel the brother was, saying something so hurtful regarding her fertility, when he was in the same situation. The entire family trying to force her to give in, ridiculous. It's her day, it's about her and her groom, nobody else gets a say in what goes. I hope she had her child free wedding and had an amazing time

For the Barn in the Bend story, I am gay and want to get married one day too. I actually do not take offense if a venue decides not to cater to same sex marriage. What was wrong here, from my understanding, is that this wasn't known from the start and that is where I think it is very wrong. If you don't want to open your doors to me and my partner, I would just move along.

The person that deleted the photos at the wedding 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 Respect goes both ways.

As a parent, anytime I get a wedding invite, the first thing I ask is “are kids allowed”. And I always hope the answer is NO! For one, I’d like a little time away with other adults. For two, it’s less people I have to worry about being appropriately dressed and behaved. I don’t understand parents that insist on bringing kids to a wedding…. Enjoy the event kid free!

The rainbow child story is just so frustrating. Ok, we get it, you wanted this baby so much...but you have a ton of other events to celebrate him, why should anyone else change their events according to your child? That's insane and so sad that the family backed out due to this. I would never talk to them ever again.

I just got married last week I fed every single vendor that worked at my wedding or provided a service this is totally unacceptable to treat people like servants my vendors were there for 8 hours feeding them a decent meal the least I could do and I gave them a very nice tip at the end

I had a mom of the bride tell me they couldn't pay me my full rate for photographing the wedding. I told her and the bride either pay the agreed price or no photos (this was in the film days) they refused so to this day I still have the film, undeveloped, its been sitting on a shelf with my other old equipment for 20+ years.

The fact that he called his sister jealouse because she cant have a baby makes him a terrible human. Why are they insisting on it so much when they know if they were to be the only exception the bride will be seen as a hypocrite and rude?? The rule is for everyone.

wedding photographer: I *personally* would have left, gotten something to eat, and not given them the photos until they paid me at least $500 and my food bill from dinner. that said.... deleting the photos was a power move and that photog deserves a fucking crown.

My cousin had one of those "rainbow babies" and I am so glad that it's not a thing where we live. The kid gets treated like any other normal child and is not a spoiled brat you want nothing to do with, the way Paul's "Miracle" is going to be

As a Brit, it was funny seeing someone hear and appreciate the term ‘mates rates’ for the first time

Personal opinion: anyone that makes their child's whole identity revolve around having deceased older siblings is probably the type to make everything about themself. I've never met anyone that's gone all in on 'rainbow baby' culture that had purely selfless intentions. It's certainly not for the benefit of the living child. I feel like deleting the photos was the right move, because there was no chance of going back after that. The groom couldn't guilt trip them into handing them over and basically getting everything he wanted in the end. Now he gets nothing, which is what he deserves after what he pulled.

People treating people like garbage is my biggest pet peeve.

8:40 love how they act like Paul's wife is the only person to miscarry. How does Paul know other kids that won't be at the wedding aren't also rainbow babies? He doesn't he just thinks his apparently brat, of a child matters more...

there was a similar case to the barn one in ireland/uk where a same sex couple took a bakery to court because the bakery refused to make a cake that was promoting same sex ideals (uk and ireland are christian countries) and the bakery won because they had the right to refuse. i think it’s better to know that the venue etc wasnt inclusive so they could take their money somewhere more deserving

I used to be a photographer for events and I never had a customer refuse me food or water. As a matter fact I always went home with a plate of food and cake. I have had a couple not want to pay and I just kept the pictures and eventually they would pay in payments.

"Just leave me alone, it shouldn't be a big deal if I bring someone or not." BRAH! that's the point of her asking. she needs to know if she needs another plate of food and a seat. it doesn't even need to be a date, even a friend you decided to bring or anyone!

I’m torn on the first one, Any business has the right to decline service, especially after covid and as many businesses refused to provide services to many people all based on what they “believed” right or wrong it was nice to see that everyone had the choice to provide or decline services as they felt worked best with them.

My eldest sister had a child free wedding and I had to leave my 3 kids home while we went 5hrs away and our son was only 2 and we'd never left him before. We had no issues about that and enjoyed the time to ourselves 😅. Paul is an AH

Brother Paul: YOUR SISTER'S WEDDING ISN'T ABOUT YOU OR YOUR BRAT KID. Period.

Rainbow baby or not, get Junior a babysitter or stay home, but don't ruin a wedding because it's not about your child.

My brother and sister in law had one of their friends randomly turn up to their wedding who they didn't even know was in the country. He'd moved to Canada from Australia, and as far as they knew he couldn't fly back to Australia because of work commitments. All of a sudden after the ceremony they spot him chatting to some friends and do a massive double take, as they thought he was still in Canada! He'd come back to Australia two days before the wedding and just assumed that he had been invited from the get go if he was able to return to Australia. The owners of the venue were lovely and somehow managed to find a seat and some food for him. He's a really nice guy and it wasn't at all malicious/narcissistic, he just didn't think to check beforehand! As my dad always says, common sense isn't that common!

It’s really upsetting how weddings can bring out the absolute worst in people.

That guy ruining his sister’s wedding and the whole family ganging up on her is mind-boggling 🤦🏻‍♀️

I’m a wedding photographer, since that story came out about the Tog deleting the images, couples have been overly nice and encouraging me to eat and have water.

In Lebanon we say “a conditional beggar”! The last one is gold.

Charlotte, I really appreciate how you subtly make it known what your own beliefs are, but also don't shame your audience for having different opinions. You always read things matter-of-factly, and ask your audience whether they agree or disagree with what you and the consensus has said. It comes off as very accommodating, no matter who's watching, and it's one of the reasons why I like your channel so much.

An undisciplined child at a wedding is chaos. But an undisciplined child at a child free wedding is a great way to ruin the event. Difficulty in conception is no excuse to be a terrible parent and expect others to enjoy your mess. Good gracious gravy..

The miracle child story is bull. She’s NTA. The family is.

I feel sorry for the bride who wanted a child free wedding, not for the wedding but because it's almost guaranteed that any children she may have will certainly be treated and thought of very differently than her nephew.

As someone who had a party and said to the guests it was child free only to have someone bring their 5 year old, have to say I was kindof ticked. I didn't say anything but that kid was bored and didn't let his parents alone. He grew up to be totally depressed mostly because his parents wouldn't let him lead his own life.

Oh geez. Paul is raising a narcissistic sociopath! He’s being told & treated like he is so special. A miracle. Aren’t we all?

My sister had her 50th at my cousin's house. The invitation said 'no kids.' I had an 18 month old. The party was 80 miles away and late in the day. I deleted the invitation and was a little sad that I couldn't go. I sent my sister an e-card on her bday but didn't call because it was a surprise party. I talked to my mom about a week later. Mom: why didn't you come? Did hubby have to work? Me: no. I can't leave (kid) with a babysitter and go somewhere 80 miles away. Mom: you could have brought her... Me: the invite said no kids.. Mom: well [kid] [kid] and [kid] was there. Why didn't you say something? Me: because you raised me to accept the rules and not ask for special treatment... is what I wish I said. 'The invitation said no kids' Mom: that didn't mean you. That was meant for other people. Sister really wanted to see [daughter] Me: well no one told me

After speeches and just before we sat down for our meal, our photographer was going to run out to Burger King for a bit to eat. We insisted he sit and have a meal at our reception. He had worked so hard and deserved to eat. At first he refused but then relented. He said it was the first time a couple invited him to join them. I don't understand how anyone can deny a photographer a meal when they work so hard for hours.

5:55 No water and food. F that! NTA. Don’t threaten your photographer with zero pay!!

I was insistent on having a child-free wedding. Years previously I went to a wedding where the bride had to carry her crying toddler down the aisle while juggling her bouquet and her father's arm, so I knew that wasn't going to be for me. I even lost a "friend" over it as they said if they couldn't bring their 5 month old baby then they wouldn't come. The week before the wedding, my husband's family pressured him to allow his nieces and nephews to come to the wedding (over my objections). Then a family member brought their baby to the reception so "everyone could see him". That should have been a huge red flag on how the marriage was going to go. So I'm all for the couple standing their ground about the (probably bratty) nephew. People need to realize it's not their wedding.

Rainbow baby: it’s born. It’s celebration was four years ago. It’s not made of gold. No kids = no kids. Done and done. What you accept teaches people how to treat you.

9:10 nta. Just because their blood doesn't mean they are "family"

Not everyone will feel comfortable hosting a same sex marriage, that's life. Doesn't mean they wish you bad. Some people just won't be comfortable doing it.

For the story about the child free wedding and the brother with the spoiled brat narcissistic bully in waiting, my response would be to send out messages to everyone that has said we’re dropping out that the wedding is canceled they are not invited and please feel free to go to Paul’s house and visit with the baby for an hour or two.

The "rainbow baby" story is just insane! First, yes, I understand how devastating the experience of repeated miscarriages can be, but what does that have to do with spoiling the child rotten and ultimately screwing them up for life? Do those parents really think they are treating the kid the right way? Second, there would have been no other kids at the wedding, so that one kid would have been bored to death and would have acted out, especially already spoilt as he was. Why would anyone want that? (I'm assuming the kid didn't have any health issues that would make it necessary to watch him constantly - in that case I'd understand, but even then I'd rather excuse myself from the wedding to stay home with my son, and nobody would have any business objecting).

We had a small wedding. My friend is an amateur photographer and I asked him if he would take some photos for us. We paid for his room and gas. However he was a wedding guest first. I told him to put his camera down and enjoy the wedding. I am grateful that he was taking photos but he was my friend first.

The person who deleted the wedding photographs in front of the bridegroom was absolutely spot-on in terms of his behaviour to not even offer the individual concerned, food or drink when they are doing that job for next to nothing, and it’s not even their profession is nothing less than an absolute liberty. When I got married, I made sure the photographer and other people who were also contributing the event, but were also being paid were fed and watered. It is a disgrace not to be considerate to all those people who are doing you a service whether or not they are being paid. Courtesy and good manners cost nothing.

The whole thing with the miracle baby bothers me. All kids are gifts in general, but holding the fact that the baby is a 'rainbow baby' over the rest of the family is pretty dumb. I agree with the redditors.

I have never, ever EVER heard of a wedding where the guests are charged per slice of wedding cake!!! At every wedding I have attended, they're giving chunks of the stuff away by the end of the evening!!

I know a family whose youngest child survived leukemia. I met them when that child was still very young (2yo?). The youngster was a bit mischievous (nice way to put it), and I was surprised that the parents didn't seem to do much about it...ever. That child grew up clueless and has not seem to ever come to understand why they are no longer coddled. They have few social skills and seem ripe for getting snagged by a cult, gang, or any other group that will promise inclusion. I fear that may be the path the rather clueless family is setting their rainbow baby on.

I’ve never heard the term ‘rainbow baby’ before. It’s hideously, stomach churningly vile. All children are special. All children are some kind of miracle.

Okay, the “rainbow baby” is no longer a baby, he’s four. I’d get it if he was like, 6 months but turning the family on her over her own wedding preferences is beyond a horrible thing to do. That family needs a lesson in…family. Wow.

Here is the thing about the child free wedding: her nephew is probably not the only "rainbow baby" amongst the guests' children. I'm willing to bet at least one of their other guests has a "rainbow baby" or some type of miracle child... should exceptions be made for all of them too? Not only that, but if the nephew is a spoiled child whose parents never impose any limitations, imagine the nightmare he would be at the wedding, especially as the only child in attendance. At the risk of sounding harsh, just because a baby was born after a miscarriage does not mean that baby is entitled to special treatment and / or privileges. If a bride and groom say the wedding is child free, then either leave your child with a sitter or simply don't go to the wedding. The child would probably be super bored at the wedding anyway, so it's not like they are missing out. So yeah, the bride and groom are NTA... the family is, big time! And if they care more about having the nephew attend than being there for the bride and groom, then honestly good riddance to them.

The first video reminds me of the snowball fight from Dumb and Dumber... lmao

Since venues are usually privately owned then yes they should absolutely be able to accept or deny their own personal policies.

: that story about the friend who deleted the photos. There is more to the story. She said in a follow up post that she had been invited and she had RSVPd! She had a table and was counted in the food count. They took her off the guest list AFTER she said she would be the photographer at their wedding for pennies… I would have deleted the photos! There is also more updates from the friend! And it gets even more frustrating!!

as a makeup artist for 10 years who did A LOT of weddings....yes. 100% the OP had every right to delete those photo's. It was already discussed that this was a favor because the budget was tight, meaning they had already shopped around and knew the average cost of having a photographer there. Considering that, the grooms behavior was abusive and not at all how you treat a friend.

The couple getting married and are having a child free wedding is Their Decision! If everyone is taking the brothers side so be it, it’s absolutely ridiculous to think his son is the exception. If they choose not to go I would be relieved, because they obviously don’t care about your feelings. And that remark about being jealous, and she can’t have kids…WOW! He could go Fu*k himself! I can’t have kids, and I have two nieces that I absolutely adore and I’m fine with that. If someone said that to me, that I’m jealous…I probably would punch em in the face. Y’all be happy and screw the haters 🙌🏻

Being hangry can make you do the most.😂 When you treat someone like crap, be prepared for a reaction that you may not like.

It's either all kids allowed or no kids allowed and gloating that she's jealous because she can't have kids makes you the worst big brother EVER.

I get that the child is special in the families eyes because of repeated miscarriages, but that doesn't give him special privileges in other people's lives. His parents are setting him up for huge disappointments in the future when he realizes the world won't think he's any more special than anyone else. Sounds like a toxic family that's raising a brat. Poor kid...it's not his fault, but he will get the repercussions of his upbringing. No kids means no kids!! Respect the wishes of the bride and groom.

My wife and myself only have one sibling between us. When my now wife said she didn't want children at our wedding, my mother pointed out that my sister has small children and probably wouldn't be able to come if we had that rule. My wife changed her mind. My sister attended with her kids and we didn't have any problems with children. Then my sister's kids aren't spoiled brats!

My mom had a adults only wedding, and the family had no problems because it's all about the bride and the groom.

Child free means NO children in attendance..period. Whether rainbow, purple, fuschia or turquoise. Not even if they're mauve! Why do people think THEIR child is more special than EVERYONE ELSE'S?! I'm sure their son isn't the only *rainbow* baby of everyone who was invited to that wedding. It's more common that many people realize. Miscarriage just isn't talked about as openly as it should be.

At my wedding, I made sure the catering company brought enough food for the photographer, the staff working and the caterers themselves. Mid way through the reception, I did a quick tour around and made sure anyone working had gotten a chance at some food and drink.

I had a child free reception at a club that was adults only. A couple of kids made it to the ceremony, and they were well behaved, then went home after. The biggest issue is that a lot of the time, kids who run amok, have parents who don't parent them, and let them do whatever they want. I simply won't associate with people like that, and certainly not at an expensive event.

11:10 sis..... If you're not happy your friend is getting married.... Why the fook did you agree to be a bridesmaid...

Brother Paul, his wife, and their rainbow baby staying away as well as the parents and uncles? Just made the wedding that much better. Signed - a mom.

Wedding childless story. I had a situation like this. I said "Your child is the reason for this decision." If they aren't going to pull any punches, I'm not.

Fun fact: You can go to deleted photos and restore em! Photos>gallery>deleted(scroll down)> select photos you wanna restore> there ya go :]

Late to the party here, but NTA for standing your ground on a kid free wedding. Everyone else who is refusing to come? Good. You said kid free, and that's how they are acting!

I've worked at a wedding before and I can honestly say it's hard and there's no way you shouldn't be offered food. The fact that he was willing to accept $250 is mind blowing.

Yo someone with 8 years experience doesn’t need “exposure”. Not that that nonsense is acceptable at any experience level, but the lack of self awareness is baffling.

I had a similar story as the couple saying no to their rainbow baby nephew. EXCEPT, it wasn’t over a nephew or niece, it was over “best friends” of my husband’s dad and stepmom. So half of my husband’s family didn’t attend because they chose a side. This was a year long argument. And we just found out that his “parents” are telling people they were uninvited to the wedding. Gaslighting, selfish family members are likely to come about for weddings. Beware!

my aunt was my photographer at my wedding i still made sure she had somewhere to sit and eat she even got a piece of the wedding cake i could never treat someone like that let alone some one who is close to me