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I have combined ADHD/ASD and PTSD, and I was shocked recently when I realized that people can actually just…keep going when they tire, like they can push through anything physically or emotionally by sheer will power. Accepting that I just can’t made me realize that the society I live in is truly disabling for me, and asking for accommodations is not weak, it’s courageous.

It’s so incredibly validating to hear about how physically demanding it is to sit at a table for prolonged periods of time. It just doesn’t seem to register to anyone unless they have to face it. Thank you so much for this. Incredibly demoralized with my chronic illness this week, but this video helps let go of some of that overwhelm

I’ve had a chronic pain condition since I was a teenager. A loved one who also has a very different set of chronic health issues used to ask me “what happens if you just push through the pain?” It was clear that they thought I should be pushing through and that I was being lazy or something. Many years later, I finally saw a variety of pain specialists that explained to me that in my case, I had a pain/muscle failure threshold and every time I went past it, it pushed the threshold lower. If I worked up near it but didn’t reach it, I could raise it gradually. That information was incredibly empowering for me in conversations about my energy and activity limitations.

I was at my sister's home recently, when one of my nephew's friends walked in. When he asked how I was, I said that I had no spoons left. This young man also has chronic pain, so he understands. However it left the two of us explaining spoon theory to the household. It's so hard for other people to understand that no, you can't keep going like the Energizer bunny and you really do need a nap if you want to be awake for dinner.

You actually saved my life a few years ago by stating "but, you don't LOOK disabled" video and other rude, uneducated comments that cut to the quick! Hideous migraines, fibromyalgia plus I had a stroke ten years ago and a neck injury after a fall. Obviously, trying to be a real "trooper" I pushed through it all, until I couldn't! I was laying on the floor (more times than I care to admit) repeatedly asking, "what is WRONG with me?" Pacing?? I didn't even know how to SPELL it; let alone practice it! Over the years, I DID learn how pace myself. Today, the top priority is to color my hair--ANYTHING else I get done is a bonus; a gift. Tomorrow, it will be doing two loads of laundry. It has helped me SO much. I will tackle a task, sit down and rest for 20 minutes and move on (if possible)! If not, at least my ONE task is complete. It's a journey; NOT a sprint! So . . . thank you--you have been my life saver!! 💜💜

I love how you’ve mentioned the “exercise and you won’t be disabled anymore” because I once had to ask a doctor “how the f* do you want me to exercise when I’m too exhausted to get out of bed sometimes?” I know that PT helps and exercise helps but it’s not a miracle nor an easy fix. Thanks to my EDS I had the astonishing result of doing too much PT and making my back problem worse. It’s annoying. I really wish I could do more exercises and maybe in a near future I will but it’s not just waking up one day and hitting the gym. Amazing video as always! I’ll be looking after pacing strategies for me.

Love you, Jessica! Neurological conditions are often not taken seriously, so I’m so thankful you included it. It helps to make it easier and spread more awareness about them 🧡

I haven't even finished this video yet but I need to share: I have an ELCI and was denied Disability because the stupid application process to GET ON disability requires too much energy and driving and appointments that I genuinely couldn't make. Because I couldn't make it to those required steps, I was denied automatically. It's so frustrating because my disability is the reason I couldn't finish my application to receive support?! (I live in the States....where apparently health care is a privilege...)

After just feeling like I couldn't do any job, I'm so happy to be a self employed dog walker and pet sitter, and grateful that dogs understand when I need to pace myself and when we can go go go. A dog has never made me feel guilty when I couldn't "bring my all" to their walk or play any given day.

The Spoon Theory helped me SO much when I was first diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I also have CFS, Underactive Thyroid and PTSD so life can be a struggle. Reading the Spoon Theory gave me a lightbulb moment that even mental work was using up energy/spoons. I’ve told everyone I know who gets diagnosed with chronic illnesses to read it because accepting your condition and limitations is tough. Sending you and all those struggling right now a gentle hug xx

"It's going to be 'Friends' for the tenth time, exactly the same episode" That is just way too relatable

The part about saying “No” is so important! (I do not have a chronic illness, but my Wife and Mother do). Don’t feel guilty thinking that you are letting others down. You are not letting anyone down. People who love and understand you, would rather you say “No” and be able to rest, especially when a “Yes” will really knock you down for who knows how long. You need to do what is best for you.

When you were talking about the energy expended sitting up at the dinner table. 😭😭😭😭 I've never heard anyone else verbalize this. Jessica, this was so validating. 💗

I have fybromyalgia, and my GP recently told me (whilest I was sitting in her office crying my eyes out because of the pain I was in) that because of my fybromyalgia it was very important for me to keep moving... yeah... you try moving when all your joints and muscles feel like there is an inferno burning it's way through from the inside out.... also I smoke a certain green herb to help me out when the pain gets really bad ( thank god that herb is atleast semi legal here in the Netherlands), and my mother has told me more than once "you only say you are in pain to have an excuse to be lazy and smoke"... that couldn't be further from the truth, I wish every day that I could live without it, but I can't

I actually never considered that my conditions were classed as energy limiting because doctors never explained that it was valid to connect my lack of energy/ ability to work a full time job without falling asleep at the desk with them. Thank you so much for making this video! I have two of the conditions on that list and hearing someone explain that the fatigue is real and a symptom just as valid as the physical pain is so affirming.

Wanted to add another chronic energy limiting illness, Chronic Anemia!! I currently suffer from it and have been since my late teens. Symptoms have worsened as I get older. As in, less able to cope or overcome Symptoms as I get older.

Having PTSD as a chronic illness, energy levels are variable. Some days symptoms are higher and energy is lower. Some days energy levels are pretty up there. But I never know what my energy level will be for the upcoming day. I did find, when learning to live with PTSD, that finding my limits and keeping in them was the best way to ensure I had enough energy to get through the day. Love the line (paraphrasing here) When there's no cure, the maintaining is the thing.

I don't feel at all bad for parking in disability spaces even though I don't generally LOOK disabled. Hooray for chronic migraine, POTS, and chronic joint pains! I do use a cane pretty much daily, and have both a walker and wheelchair for the days that aren't so good. People usually leave me alone when they see my cane. Even if they do decide to complain, I have all of my paperwork and am usually in enough pain to NOT have the energy or patience to deal with their absolute BS. Whether or not I have that blue thing in my window that says I can park in disabled parking is between me and my doctors, not some rando who thinks I "don't look disabled"

So glad you’re talking about this! For years I’ve gotten funny looks when I tell people I have a “pain calculator”. Pain is very memorable and I quickly learned to calculate stuff like how many times I’d have to bend my knees, stand up or sit down, and how the temperature would effect my joints. Not to mention the energy to takes to engage with people while you’re in pain. Humaning with a chronic illness to hard in way people don’t think about!

Crazy to me how she talks, dresses and acts so lively and cheerfully. When I can't even imagine the pain and sorrows she must've been through.

"People only see you on the good days" DUDE! THANK YOU! that explains why no one seems to suspect I have an illness even though to me it's obvious. That actually makes a lot of sense.

I have always struggled with excessive tiredness for no "medical" reason, and was diagnosed with anxiety and depression about a year ago. So much more makes sense now!! Your content really helps me feel like I'm less alone, I'm 23 and honestly it's an uphill struggle some days. I'm definitely going to apply pacing to my daily life, and helpfully it will help me balance the load of Adulting a bit better.

Hearing all of this helped me so much. I have ASD and the sensorial overload just drains me little by little. And i’m just called lazy and i end up forcing myself and that leads me to breakdowns. Thank you so much ❤️

Lol I got sick while in the best shape of my life (ran 30+ miles a week) People think that healthy habits will save them from disability Alas ableds, I'm here to tell you that this is not true The way you treat us is the way that people will treat you when you're sick #FoodForThought

As an autistic I feel a lot of these effects too. I can't really call autism an illness, because it's such a debated area even within the community, but it certainly hits a lot of the same boxes. Learning to manage your energy is paramount in reaching a state of living you feel comfortable with, and I'm so glad you made this video and helping to raise awareness for it.

Thank you for this Jessica. I’ve always struggled with pacing, and trying to do the most in the hours I feel “good.” “You are here, you are seen, and you are not alone” made me tear up 🥲

Jessica I love this. I never thought to use an energy map. What a great idea. I was telling someone the other day I would not be available because my period was due and my symptoms would be bad. They started asking if I should see someone about my unpleasant symptoms and I was like “actually my period symptoms are the least of my worries and I love that because I have a regular period I know when they are coming.” My period symptoms are one of the few things I can predict, so its one area I feel like there is some control. I can schedule around it. I also often find walking easier than just sitting….this has been difficult to explain to others.

You have helped me with my illness so much. I recently got a diagnosis after 5 years of not knowing. I've been able to start medication and physical therapy to help my migraines. You were one of the people I looked to when I was lost and felt like no one would ever help me. Thank you for sharing your story and I hope you live the best life.

I am glad I have a doctor who takes my condition seriously. I have several neurological disabilities. Including autism, anxiety, depression, epilepsy, and severe PTSD.

Thank you so much Jessica! I’ve been struggling so much with my chronic conditions and how changeable it can be. It’s hard to explain to another person that “yes, today I can walk” etc, but then “no, today I can’t hold my arms up to drink my tea it’s too exhausting”. It wears thin… you’re content is so much appreciated ❤️

I'm an American. We also call it jam. "Jelly" is usually the stuff with only the juice of the fruit used. "Jam" usually means something more like preserves (has fruit in it). But it's not a hard and fast rule. Also, love your channel ❤️

I've been really struggling with my fatigue lately. Especially with trying to date. Meeting new people and going on first dates is...incredibly exhausting

I might have one of the easiest and most common diagnosis ever: asthma, but severe. However, I do feel limited by that a lot and it being common doesn't make it better, because, come on, everyone has asthma! Now I am sick with what I think is Covid and your video made me feel better about laying in bed all day.

I had (more than once) a person stop me in the store and accuse me of scamming the system because I was clearly NOT disabled. I had a temporary disabled permit for my car because I had had surgery that had me cut open from both my knees up to my bellybutton (like an upside down Y), and involved taking out a muscle from my leg to repair a section of my lower abdomen. I was also doing chemotherapy at the time (I did not loose my hair from my régime of chemo so there was no obvious physical signs). I was polite with the first person….. the second person got a good look at my abdominal scars and then I asked them if they wanted me to drop my pants to see the rest of my scars…..that shut them up pretty quick! Hopefully they will think twice about harassing another disabled person. I totally get calling someone out if they’re parked without a permit (my son was fully wheelchair bound so I have actually called people out) but if someone has a permit, and they are not given out easily, then it’s really not your place to comment.

Even though I don't have an ELCI I still find the tips/idea of being aware of your energy resources for the day and planning accordingly to not get burnt out very helpful!

I LOVE mildly sarcastic Jessica. I adore chipper cheerful Jessica as well, but annoyed-at-society, mildly sarcastic Jessica is such a relatable, understandable, REASONABLE mood.

I’m so glad you mentioned the couch to 5k thing. I’ve been trying to increase my cardio to help with the POTS and I set a goal for myself to be able to run a 5k by June. Unfortunately I’m nowhere near there. To put it in perspective I’ve been running for nearly two years. POTS (and possibly ME) makes it so difficult to push my limits without severe consequences. I just don’t have the ability to reach athletic goals in the same span of time as anyone else

This is actually a tremendously helpful way to view dealing with my health struggles. I so often want to push through to perform at the the level I feel like I should be able to... And then deplete myself for weeks as a result. Which leads to more struggles of feeling inadequate. I'm finally starting to learn that staying within my limits day-to-day helps me do much better in the long run. I know the video isn't necessarily for me, but thank you for spreading the message of self-understanding and self-care!

one thing people don't ever understand (at least in my experience) is that conversation takes a lot A LOT of energy and the more the people the worse the energy drain. Everyone tells me to spend more time with my family, insisting that i can lie on the sofa and relax and talk and have fun. What i can't seem to explain to them is that i can't afford to do that and that i find lying in bed mindlessly consuming media as i dissociate to a brainless blob much easier than talking to my parents [which by the way i still wouldn't want to do even if i was in full health cuz they are some very emotionally abusive and toxic people]. Plus, as an autistic person i already find conversations (unless with my people) very very exhausting, it takes a toll on me that makes me want to throw up. but everyone including my parents just keep pestering me as if by sitting with them and undergoing my usual sessions of beratement would magically make my pain go away.

Something I would add to your list of chronic illnesses are some mental illnesses. My mental illness affects my energy and in addition my mental anguish manifests in physical pain. I also vomit a lot from exasperation in my issues which causes a lot of body aches after. In addition, the anxiety aspects of my mental illness causes breathing and heart issues (similar to atrial fibrillation illness) which is also exhausting and causes pain, discomfort, and fatigue. When I have a bad day mentally, I typically need to sleep for two days straight and my body aches. As well, I use pacing (my psychiatrist even called it that) to break down energy levels exerted by different tasks, especially emotional and mental ones. For example, I went to Disney World last summer. The week before, I rested and did nothing. I built up my energy bank. I knew I would last more than 3 days doing the disney thing. After the trip, I crashed for 3 weeks. I stayed in my room and slept and ate comfort foods. Disability/chronic illness can be based in many different things. I think mental illness has such a stigma that causes those of us that suffer with severe issues are not taken seriously. In fact, yesterday was a trying day for me emotionally and physically as it was non-stop and not what I wanted to be doing. Today I skipped class and am resting, eating gluten free mac and cheese, and gonna watch the new Pixar movie. I don't know how to explain how the mental/emotional and physical fatigue tie into each other, but I know they do. I guess maybe there is a chance I have CFS, but I agree, doing couch to 5k is not going to get me out of bed today

Thank you for your posts, Jessica. I am a lesbian with an amazing wife of 12 years & I also have had Multiple Sclerosis for 30+ years. Your posts are such an encouragement from your posts.

I have ankylosing spondylitis. Unlike a lot of chronic illnesses exercise really does help, but I often don't have enough energy to do the thing that will help me most. So yes, pacing myself is necessary to keeping myself balanced on that tightrope; if I overdo it I'm screwed, but if I don't do enough I'm also screwed.

Hi Jessica I've just started the pacing thing (didn't know it had a name) and it's actually really helpful for myself 😀

Jessica! You have no idea how helpful this video is to me. As lovely as the lovely people in my life can be, they simply do not understand the concept of chronic illness, so I’ve never came close to being taught this kind of coping techniques. This is beyond incredible for me, the tips in this video will not only help me, but they also opened a full range of things I now know to Google to get similar information! Thank you so much.

I think the hardest aspect of pacing for me is how it involves other people. When I could barely get of the couch is was so hard to ask my family if they could make me lunch (being walking to the fridge, putting cheese on bread, and walking back to the fridge) as it felt like such an easy thing I should be able to do even when I couldn’t. Or to ask if I could eat dinner on the couch as that didn’t require me to sit as upright

A bit less than a year ago I was diagnosed with idiopathic hypersomnia. Without my medicine for it I have absolutely no energy and have crazy long sleep times. With it, though, I can do most things able-bodied people with normal energy can do. Key term: most, not all. Because of that I often feel like I'm not disabled and don't deserve any sort of help or accomodations. My symptoms are debilitating and very real. Thank you for the reminder that it is okay to get the help I need.

I feel like this video will help a lot of people.

Jessica: "You are seen." Me: Haha! Time to cry! Edit: since you've had new hearing aids I've been hearing a slightly different voice. That surprised me as a hearing person Edit 2: sitting up being effort is SUCH A MOOD

It's like you know what I need, when I need it. I needed the reminder that Ehlers Danlos Syndrome is an ELCI. Doctors are baffled, which makes me try to gaslight myself out of my pain.

This has helped me so much. I suffer from PTSD which comes with some physical limits. I am just happy to know that I am not crazy and I really do need that time to rest and do nothing.

This video came at the perfect time. My energy levels are at an all time low, even had to turn down seeing my best friend. I literally was thinking how much I wished there was a video about how to pace yourself and such when the notification popped up. Thank you Jessica!

I'm not chronically ill but I was burnt out a year ago and (in combination with adhd and other mental health issues) I therefore have a more restricted energy bank than I used to have. So this video was definitely helpful! ❤️

thank you for including long covid. I have RA and EDS (not badly but enough that I was always dislocating things, like shoulders and spraining ankles). But friends with long covid now, will say "Oh I know why you take a nap every afternoon" (one claims if she is going to do something in the evening, she has to plan a nap in the afternoon.)

I've had to learn pacing after the past several years of chronic fatigue, pain, migraines and PTSD...I didn't know what it was called until today! I've learnt more from Jessica than any health care professional I've seen. As someone who was previously always on the go (any other Capricorns here?), I still deal with guilt and frustration over not being able to do as much as I used to (I used to work 12-16 hours a day for a start), so this is a wonderful reminder that pacing is absolutely necessary. Love you Jessica and your channel. 💜💛💚💙

Such a timely post! I'm finally getting around to not just forgiving myself for being exhausted, but realizing I don't need to forgive myself for it. Chronic pain is managed best by me managing my energy output. But it's so hard to say no sometimes. Or cancel plans. Or not meet a deadline I agreed to. It's embarrassing, especially since it wasn't that long ago that I had energy and was not chronically and invisibly ill. Thank you for this. I'm going back to bed now.

Since my wife died last month, I've been pushing myself. I have fibro, but for the first 4 days, my sister pushed me. I did take a break after she left, but only for a couple of days. Now, however, I am more pacing myself. I don't do more than an hour at a time, generally less, but if I do less, I'll try to get back to what I was doing so I can finish it in a day. This is how I've managed to clean all the counter tops in my kitchen. I've also started on going through my pantries, yeah, I have 2. I'm going through the one I haven't gone through since we set it up in 2018. I've taken 2 loads of expired food out of it. The wife would want something, get it and then only eat a few cans of it and... well... it expired. The deal is, however, with my food allergies, I couldn't help her eat them - I've a serious corn protein allergy.

Thank you for this video. I'm having a rough time right now and it was like sitting down with a friend to talk about caring for myself.

I have ankylosing spondylitis and always forget it causes fatigue. I've been barely able to stand up today and this was really good timing for this video. Thank you!

My ELCI power move is going out with friends and falling asleep in my seat. I love how normal this has become, and I can still sort of hear what is happening and feel involved.

Thank you so much for making this! And for mentioning the struggle with boredom. I went from being a fairly active, creative, spontaneous person to being someone who spends most days in front of a screen just to keep the boredom from exhausting me even further. After years I think I have the ”sense” of pacing down, as in, I can feel what my energy levels are for the day and kind of predict how much I can do without exhausting myself. But about every two months, I start doubting that I actually need to limit myself that much, and try to do just a little bit more, then when I start getting seriously exhausted after three to four days, I remember why I usually do so little. It’s very very frustrating, sad and scary, and hard to explain to people who only ever see me on my good days or when I have saved up energy to visit, or when I’m burning my reserves to be able to see them.

Thank you so much. I have long covid and have to write a list of everything I have to do in a day and what I can put off if I need to. A lot of people have told me I need to work out but I already go to the gym about twice a week to try to get my lungs working and my strength back. I have to be on a good day energy/brain fog wise for my health and safety (even basic equipment can become very dangerous with brain fog) and even then, twenty minutes of exercise wipes me out for hours. My uni isn't offering any help because of the lack of research so I'm having to email my teachers individually and rely on my girlfriend for more than I'd like to.

This is a couple of months late, but thank you for making this video. As someone living with schizophrenia it's hard to remember to pace myself. Often it's difficult doing basic things like getting out of bed, eating, leaving the house for even a few minutes. And more complicated things like spending time with friends (or even just messaging them) , cleaning/chores, reading books, even just picking a youtube video to watch are downright impossible most days. Often I have to weigh the tasks I need to get done against my wants, and tap out on spoons before I've even finished the "needs" list. So, thank you for validating my experiences with this and making me feel like there's something I might actually be able to do about it. I really needed that.

I've recently embraced allowing myself a nap if I need it. I used to feel bad if I felt like I needed to rest. What did I do? I've only been up for x hours, I can't possibly be tired yet. I don't "deserve" to lay down! No. I remind myself I have RA and lupus. Existing uses more energy and resources vs a healthy person. So, I allow myself the nap if I need it now. And I try to squash the societal guilt I've learned all my life.

You are such a delight to listen to/watch even while speaking out about important issues. So glad I found your channel (years ago) while trying to gather ideas for period clothes & hairstyles. Had no idea I'd also be dealing with chronic illness back then but here we are 🤷🏼

Omg, that example of eating at the diner table. Perfect example. I cut up everything right at the beginning, so I can hold my fork in my right hand and support my head/upper body with my left hand. If I'm home I can rest my body forward on my legs that get pulled up to chest level. Makes eating so much more enjoyable.

Hi from Denmark! Brain injury is also under this category 😅 We had a course on fatigue management, but it still takes so long before you really accept and live by it 😉😝 Love your videos 💝💝

Thank you so much for posting this - I am about to start a very intense course of treatment that is likely to leave me incredibly fatigued, going to use some of these tips!

This is amazingly validating. Thank you. I have been dealing with Covid effects for months and feel guilty for how much it impairs my life. I haven't called it a chronic illness bc theoretically it's temporary.

Please spread more awareness about endometriosis. Its kind of an auto immune issue but so much more!

This is invaluable. I cried during parts because it was sooo validating. I’ve been living in so much denial and also disassociation from what I’m feeling (very good at ignoring it/pushing it down), it makes a recovery plan tough. Also, I’m a single mom with a kiddo who needs higher support than some and I have adhd. So…. It’s been SUCH a learning experience that I can’t do it all. But I kind of broke myself, I think. I’ve been living my life in a way where I just push through and get done what needs to get done, no matter how tired I am. And when I got sick, it didn’t work. I tried to exercise so so so many times before the PEM finally made me stop. I’d wait a little and then try again crash. The push crash cycle was devastating. When you mentioned lack of control, that’s 100% where I was. But once you accept that you need to live life a different way, you can start embracing that. I found this validating, bath also extremely practical. So sharing a little bit, but mostly just wanted to say THANK YOU!

This was brilliant and amazingly helpful. I am almost 40 now, have been dealing with CFS triggered by Epstein Bar Virus when I was 15, plus insane allergies, asthma and some other mental disorder stuff (in the process of being diagnosed). I have spent years trying to live up to the expectations of people who not only don't understand the conditions I deal with but often completely disregard their validity. I am only now starting to forgive myself for being ill (which sound crazy and probably is) and allow myself the leeway I need to build a life that works for me.

Thank you for the video ❤ I've been struggling a lot with my chronic illnesses, and they've gotten worse since I got Covid in 2020. It's scary to feel like you're slowly losing who you used to be, but your videos are very uplifting and helpful. 💗

Always love the chronic illness tips. I often find myself coming back to these types of videos when I'm struggling for your practicality and positivity. Thank you, Jessica!

For such a long time I've felt absolutely crushed every time I've felt exhausted, depressed, anxious or have zero attention span. Also, memory loss and having issues with fine motor skills. I always thought, "Why am I broken again?". I'd have a really great stretch of a few days, sometimes a few weeks and then I would get completely wiped out. Thankfully my partner is incredibly supportive and just gets it. So when I have a moment when I feel like I am a failure because I can't help prepare dinner and I don't feel safe around knives because my hands don't seem to want to work, then my partner either tells me to rest or suggests laying the table or getting drinks ready (this actually helps so much because of the options). Doctors are little to no help so I've been taking my time to feel out my limits at home, in work, etc.

I just got diagnoses FINALLY so this is helpful

Thankyou so much for acknowledging Long Covid in this video 💕 So many people now at 2+ years and yet even within the medical community our symptoms are often being dismissed and the condition trivialised.

I've only recently been diagnosed with several chronic conditions, both mental and physical. I've dealt with them all of my life, but since I didn't have access to medical care, I was always made to feel like I was lazy or wasn't trying hard enough. Now I realize that I was trying more than enough and after getting confirmation that I was indeed ill, I've been able to set boundaries comfortably. I'm still learning what my limits are and how to deal with that, but it's become significantly easier once I realized that it's okay to not be okay. I've explained my issues to friends and loved ones; some understand, but others are hellbent on remaining ignorant. They're not living in my body and don't have to experience the daily struggles I go through, so I brush it off. The people closest to me understand just enough to help me in any way they can, so that's all that matters. Nothing's ever easy anymore, but I'm still chugging along.

Thank you again, Jessica. As a woman who's nearing her 72nd birthday and in overall good health; age brings it's own challenges, and my energy level is one of them. Never having driven, I walk everywhere, and do aerobic exercise. Once or twice a month I am just exhausted, and allow myself an "in bed" day as needed. I plan for chores, but feel entitled to move one or more if I run out of energy, and reward myself with a "crafts" day occasionally, to indulge in purely creative expression, as that's a big part of life for me. Learning to cope with reduced balance, visual acuity, stamina and range of motion is challenging, but no more than many folks live with from childhood. It's all about being grateful for what you can do and making preparations for those times when you can't do much. You give clear expression to so many issues. Thanks!

Hi, I'm Angela. I'm from America. I love your channel especially the baking. I have chronic pain all over my body and I also have congestive heart failure all at 42. People always talk about how young I am. The doctors don't know what caused my heart condition. I have fine blood pressure and good cholesterol. They say I must have gotten a virus. Anyway, I often blame myself, think I'm just being lazy, or think that I need to be out of bed everyday. This video is a life saver. It made me feel less alone and less lazy. A lot of your videos help me. Thank you so very much.

I deal with depression on and off since my early twenties and feeling exhausted simply by being with a lot of people that I love, or having to go grocery shopping are some of the things relatives and friends don't usually understand. I don't know if I'm chronically ill but this video helped me a lot. Since my last down I've been thinking my automatic pilot is broken because I'm much more aware of what everyday tasks are extremely energy consuming for me that aren't for most of the people surrounding me. I have been looking for a way to organise my life in order not to arrive to my Friday nights needing to sleep 15 hours non stop and it's the first time I hear from pacing. I will strongly appreciate a more detailed video on how to start pacing. Thank you very much Jessica, sincerely, thank you.

Is there a book about this? You ticked off every single one of my boxes-every single one! I appreciate you making this video, because I can give it to some of my family members who just don’t understand ( they see me on my good days or moments).

With ME/CFS it is especially important to practice pacing. Unfortunately, people with ME/CFS can have a long term worsening of symptoms if they overdue themselves especially if they don't recover adequately between crashes. I used to think I just had the ELCI, Fibromyalgia and that overdoing it would cause flares, but that I could recover to my pre-flare levels. I couldn't understand why my energy levels decreased more and more and I was progressively getting worse. Then I realized I had ME/CFS as well and that patients with ME/CFS don't always recover from over extending themselves. It is a incredibly distressing aspect to ME/CFS. One that even doctors haven't historically recognized especially in the UK (fraudulent PACE trial.) It doesn't help that the diagnosis of ME/CFS is often delayed for years for people that have it.

thankyou for your videos, i cannot express how amazing they are. im currently dealing with an undiagnosed chronic illness and hearing soemone else talk about them makes me feel so much less alone in a world where most people dont understand what its like

I've just changed from part time to full time university and am trying to find my own pacing/balance. If I try to just push through I'll end up with a migraine and basically useless for a couple of days. Right now I'm trialling 2 days on and 1 day off to see if that will help keep my physical and mental energies up enough so I don't fall behind. Thank you Jessica for opening my eyes to the wide range of disabilities, and teaching me that I'm not a failure because of my limitations xo ❤

Drink soup through a straw! You can purée almost any soup into a straw consistency. Game changer.

I have a number of interrelated and inter-conflicting conditions. The biggest impact "pacing" has on my life is preparing for an important event. I am SO CAREFUL for the days or week before something I want or need to be at. What I eat, how much I clean, how much I sleep, how much I shower. I've learned a lot and have gotten pretty good at it, but boy is it exhausting trying to not be exhausted at exactly the right moment!

Thank you so much for talking about this i literally do things one thing at a time i have a very quiet simple life and only leave the house once a week it's all i can handle and i don't apologize to anyone anymore

18:30 I was actually watching this during a crash. I finally had enough friends to have an actual house party for my birthday, and it was actually everything I wanted. But now I am so sore and so I’m just doing plant care to keep moving while I wait to go to bed

I tried pacing, but was in a bad stretch of my illness(es). We had to differentiate between active rest, passive rest and activity, but I was getting sicker and sicker, so it did not help. Now I'm in a better stretch, but I'm waiting on a possible new diagnosis (my IgA, IgG2 and IgM were low the last time they took my blood, which probably means my immune system is crap), and that might have an influence on my energy levels and how I look at them, because there is a difference between having low energy because of my depression (then it is best to push myself), low energy because of my CFS (avoid overexertion, but stay remotely active) and having an infection (stay in bed and try to do the bare minimum to stay alive, like eating/drinking, taking meds, and going to the bathroom)

I suffer from chronic migraines. Some days are good, some are bad. Stress and weather/pressure change are my major triggers. I am blessed to be working in a smaller school where they know me and care about my well-being. I am only part-time but I am working towards full-time.

It's so refreshing to hear someone else talk about the need to ration energy. I've tried explaining to healthy friends why I can't "just stay up late one night" or why sometimes it's either wash dishes OR do a load of laundry. Or (when your disability isn't outwardly apparent) why today you can do X amount of work but only Y amount another day. This is very validating. Thank you.

Parent and child parking sounds SO helpful 🤯🤯 especially having 2 kids to manage!

I have quite the list of chronic illnesses and wasn’t properly diagnosed until I was 27. Pacing is something I’ve never mastered and struggle with greatly. Thank you for your content.

I have audhd cptsd and multiple physical disabilities that cause chronic pain. Pacing can be difficult when all you want is to do anything BUT sit down or stay in bed, because yes it is very boring. Podcasts and books are super helpful. I've found some funny ones.

I live with chronic pain (specifically migraines) and never... even got a diagnosis. I still don't technically have one. One day, about two or three years after I finally had a doctor listen to me and got some proper pain medication, I got a letter in the mail for people with "severe chronic migraines" and the moment I realized that I do, in fact, have chronic pain, I felt so validated and relieved that I could've cried. It's gotten so much more manageble since I found that out, and even more so when I feel like there's actually people that understand.

Pacing for me will involve developing a career path that is compatible. Currently on my work days I have no time for breaks and must go nonstop but for a 30 min break for a 8 to 10 hour shift. Nearly everyday I'm crying through work and in pain but to keep my job I have to work through it. Many customers have interacted with me with tears on my face but a smile and the right words lol

After years of being a stubborn idiot and acting like “God I’m exhausted, can’t think and in pain but I’ve got a ton of schoolwork to do and those tasks for my job, I’ll blast through them and I’ll be alright, right?” I had a horrific energy crash, have been more or less housebound for the last week and a half now, and with help/evidence from my doctor, actually reduced my hours at work and at college and am now researching ways to be more mindful of my energy levels (I don’t know what my condition is yet as I’m still waiting on that neurology appointment - thanks NHS! 😒). I love the colouring in idea and will do that. Your videos have really helped me with that Jessica - thanks so much!

My mom has fibro and a fused ankle. She gets tired easily. She used to be mobile at a young age, but she can't do the stuff she used to be able to do. She gets embarrassed asking for help or needing more time to walk somewhere. I do my best to help her feel like she can ask for help or more time. Thank you for making this video because my mom has a hard time keeping up with normal society and it breaks my heart that she is ashamed that she can't.

this video brought me to tears as person with chronic kidney disease, stage 5 waiting for transplant. it's so hard for friends who are able bodied and not ill to understand how limiting it is. I think I have overcompensated for years for this, by pushing and pushing myself until the point that I CAN'T. my body, mind, emotions, spirit are in the CAN'T/WON'T place because I ignored that for years. slowly releasing the need to hide disability, and to set my limits to myself and others. 💕 I'm very "in the woods" with these themes right now, thank you for just shining a little light into the shadows. 💕💕