sorry but your haircut reminds me of edna mode lol. but on a serious note, thank you for this video it means a lot for transpeople like me. Much love

Putting on thigh high socks after I shave my legs makes me feel soooo good. That reliefs my dysphoria, by like a factor of five.

I'm a nonbinary person and I'm struggling a lot lately, I really thank you for everything you do, I really appreciate it and you're helping a lot...thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤️

One of the first things I tried aside from wearing woman's clothes at home was to paint my toenails because it's something that I can hide. I used a color that I perceive as very feminine. I also painted my fingernails yesterday but in black this time. I did not do this one just to fight dysphoria. This one was to help me build up my confidence and courage because it can't be hidden if I go outside. I went ouside once. This is my first step toward my coming out.

I like wearing nice lingerie - not for sexual gratification but for emotional stability. When I have the house to myself I’ll do my makeup, with a nice wig and a pretty dress. The days I can do this I feel almost normal and have a deep feeling of contentment. I’ve started dressing when my wife’s around and found her reaction better than I expected. She said I was actually cute ! I guess baby steps with this help.

I am 3 months on HRT as a 48 year old mtf. I am transitioning from the inside out slowly. Things that are invisible to others but help me feel more feminine. A simple non cosmetic beauty regime, non visible hair removal, underwear, nails short, but caring for them, every tiny thing helps and as the transition progresses the things can become a little more visible step by step. On days where the dysphoria is crippling I take extra time to exfoliate, moisturise, a little hair product, wear the most feminine underwear I have, file my nails, whatever it takes to help. Along with watching your videos. Thank you. They help.

TW suicide, Self Harm, Abuse, Alcohol dependency . . . . . . . Please listen to these tips. I was born in 1966 and every since I can remember 2/3 years old and knowing im a girl. I nearly told my grandfather at 6 years old could he go to the man in the shop and ask him to make me into a girl.i always went to ask but changed it to a bird or something. My grandfather was the only person I trusted I have 5 sisters and we were all abused severely as children, living in fear and terror of my fathers NPD and mothers BPD. I was diagnosed with PTSD from the abuse. I'm 54 years old. I couldn't let anyone see my horrible genitalia pre puberty. Actually top and bottom, I was so ashamed, I dreaded having communal showers with boys at school. I used to secretly dress, before puberty. I used to dream of seeing me and would wake up miserable, I also had to deal with parental abuse and bullying at school. The depressive states from abuse and dysphoria became mixed and I felt like crying for no reason and couldn't work out all of this depression. When T hit me I thought I was going to die, I felt physically sick and severely depressed. I remember asking my mum if I was going to die. On top of this I was indoctrinated into Catholicism; people like me go to hell. I still have this fear; I don't believe, but its still there. I used to think "it" would go away, there was nothing I could do other than repress to a point where I had an existential crisis at 28 and didn't feel I existed anymore. The more I repressed the worse my depression got. At 15 I was self harming, I didn't know why. I just felt better after. I had already from the age of 17 started suicide attempts and being sectioned to a mental facility. I was also drinking to self medicate, but this lowered my inhibitions and I would tell a girlfriend, which made me feel ashamed and disgusted, not to mention severely guilty and depressed. I looked for help in 1986, but in those days you were either TS or TV. If you didn't transition you were TV. But I knew this wasn't true. I was surprised at the secret Meting place I went to that many of the dressed people there said they were men. It had to be secret, you would be stabbed in London (where I lived). I said are you a female/girl, they laughed and said no; it was a sleazy sex club unknown to me.i never went back. In 2000 oI called the gender Trust in Brighton, I had moved there with work, I was a software developer. I was told to explore and it felt euphoric. I instantly wanted hormones. I was drinking very heavy and going to the clair project. I had a girlfriend (i could never be intimate, it repulsed me). We had bought a house, she wasn't happy about me transitioning. I was 24/7 drinking, to go out of the house I had to drink lots of red wine. I got so much abuse, I was too afraid to go to work as me. It was too distressing having to go back to presenting as male. I was also getting abuse. I ended up getting the sack for taking time off, I was devastated, I lost everything. I was sectioned for my own safety. I was diagnosed with severe gender dysphoria mixed state depression and alcohol dependency. My other problem was why didn't I fancy men, I desire them, but there is no connection. All of my friends were female. After being let out I started drinking 24/7 running up a huge overdraft. This nearly killed me i was having alcoholic fits and my nervous system was destroyed. I remained abstinent from drink, then I decided to ride "it" out. I went into to denial. But the dysphoria was worst than ever, I just ignored it. I had lost all hope. My life continued with admissions for suicide and sevetr depression. All the while dressing in secret and feeling disgusted and ashamed. Eventually at 48 I began the process. It really was do or die. I was diagnosed with severe.dysphoria three times and a classic. Dr Lorimer (i went private) said it was down to was down to strong female family DNA and said he was surprised I hadn't been investigated for intersex. In the UK its a 6-7 year wait to see an endo. I ended up in march 2019 being resuscitated and put into an induced coma from a suicide because of the wait. As a result I have been fast tracked. However it is still a three year wait for surgery. My physical self has suffered, but at least I have breasts, and paid for facial hair removal. I will wait, but I'm now worried I might die before surgery. Not dealing with my dysphoria and being in denial has ruined my life. I feel like a 14 year old girl in a 54 year old body. So please seek help, "it" *me being female and incongruent, does not go away. There are so many resources today. This is a serious life threatening condition, don't end up like me, seek help now, as Dr Z says you can come out totally anonymously. Open one door at a time, if it feels ight open the next. Despite all of this I do feel content, no more hiding, and I have some hope. The blocker was a relief and the oestrogen has feminised my entire body. Oh one last thing hair loss and voice dysphoria are sooo miserable, I could not go anywhere without a hat, ever. However there are treatments. Good luck to everyone. Be proud of yourself, you no longer need to hide. I am totally proud to be female and developing. Young people are fab, especially students. You don't NEED TO BE AFRAID... I actually pass well, and you will too. Violet 💜

I'm a questioning nb and I don't think I will ever have medical forms of transitioning. Anyhow, these things helped me tremendously: *1. get a haircut.* People might oppose it but just tell them you're bored with it and want to try something new. *2. wear the type of underwear you're comfortable with.* This is something I'd long thought but I had no idea how right it would feel. *3. buy clothes that help you look more in line with how you feel inside.* Even just one item at a time if you're worried about people questioning you. *4. get rid of the clothes and other items that you only have to confirm your AAB gender.* I used to have a lot of cosmetics, feminine tops, skirts, handbags etc just lying around even if I never used them, because everyone just excepted me to have them - and moreover anything, maybe they were a way to me to assure myself I'm a woman (looking back, sounds so pathetic). Cleaning your apartment from the stuff that painfully reminds you of the gender you don't feel like is like cleaning a part of your soul. + if you do a giveaway, it's nice to make someone happy who really enjoys that stuff. That too validates your own feelings to see that someone really does enjoy that stuff and everyone doesn't just use it because they have to due to exceptations, like you might feel. *5. find someone you can talk to,* even just an anonymous group online can be enough. The main thing is you have someone to reflect your feelings to. *6. you don't have to come out as trans/nb if you really aren't sure about it.* I felt the pressure before, but now I'm just comfortable not being out because I feel like it's no-one's business but mine. It feels if I came out (let alone looked for medical help), I would have to try and assure people of my gender, to which I don't feel pressure to do now. Though I think I kinda don't care if people misgender me, since my discomfort comes more from my perception about my body than interpersonal connections, so probably someone else would feel like it's way more crucial to come out.

I paint my nails with black nail polish, and I feel better about myself when I look at them..I even feel kind of pretty. I've talked to my mother about how I've felt since I was young and why I have women's clothing in my closet, but even though she didn't seem to resent me for it, I could tell that talking to her about it made her feel uncomfortable. I'd give almost anything to really be a woman and the uneasy feeling is with me whenever I'm not immersed in something else. I play video games a lot; especially ones that let you create your own character. Even though I've already tried and considered the points of advice that you presented in this video, I still really appreciate it. n_n thank you.

I wish you were my therapist :")) I cant get a gender therapist at the moment, I've just been seeing my college nurse. She's lovely and I'm very grateful for her, but would love to have a therapist who is more informed. Please keep making videos! I love your content!!

I'm so sick of trying to do something about it and I'm so unsure about my feelings and myself. So I don't take off my hoddie for 7 days (the 7th day I take a shower), and forget I have a body.

Your channel is a blessing, thank you for everything you do. (:

I am just about to start my transition journey into a female i currently crossdress 100% of the time i want to start hormone treatment not sure if i want to fully transition

HRT helped with migraines and the intensity thereof, as well as brain chemistry. Was hoping the breast growth would be more, but A cups do give me a sense of reaching family size normalization, as I've grown to slightly fuller growth then my oldest sister. Lucky I'm tall and have facial features that are identical to that of my grandmother and mother. My voice does give me the biggest section of anxiety, but 80% if not more of the time, I'm address as Ms which is validating, just struggling with some of the people I knew, before finding a medical group of people that would assist. 32 years of looking and finding medical practitioners who are willing seems like a lifetime, but its almost 8 years later, and I start off with questions to predetermine if a medical practitioner is biased towards transgender people, and thus avoid them, because I also know that I can't keep quiet when being disrespected (call it brain to mouth syndrome, as my brain to filter to mouth works irregularly). I'm also glad, that I've got the lack of standing back for a fight, as it created a safer space for those that still have to come and the few that have come after me. For me being a fighter and knowing that my fights which are verbally, mentally, some physically, are clearing the path for others to follow and inadvertently have way less struggles then me, is also helping with the disphoria. My biggest question mark I have to myself is usually, "Why does men take my friendly nature as flirtatious and hit on me? What did I do to this unknown guy, to make him think that being assertive and friendly equals flirtation?" Fortunately, 90% of the time now I get treated in the gender I identify as, helping with my dysphoria. 50% pre 2013 I was disregarded as female and told I'm gay. Less then 10% of people figures out that I'm transgender, and even less confronts me in an aggressive manner, because I carry myself as a confident female, but on the inside I still question myself on am I making a difference or am I going against what other females would do, till I see my friends that are cisgendered and just as confident and stubborn as me. My advice is, find something that centers you and draws you closer to the gender you identify as. Your confidence will give others the information to respect you as the gender you portray, making them treat you as that gender. Not because they fear you, but because they respect you and because they can see that you are comfortable in your decisions to show the world the authentic you.

What helped me with GD? I realized it was an internal self desire to actualize as a woman. To bring my anima into full consciousness. I gave up my male ego to become her. Previously I had been a man and had acted to bury her in my subconscious mind. This was the cause of my GD. It was psychological in nature. Hint your mate is inside of you, do not harm him with medical band aids.

I found that binder can make me feel more fake sometimes and my favorite clothes that are sweatpants shirt with t-shirt make me feel like kid buch woman or woman playing man and I am not even man so it can be hard to pick an item but for example working out makes me feel more me, posing in masculine manner shirtles makes me feel more me because I kind off find it more disctressing to see my chest in clothes. The most affirming is talking with other nonbinary people becauae I tend to believe others more - so I talk with someone relate to them and thus feel more secure in my own identity because they with the same/similar expirience feel like they are nonbinary/claim that label. I find it hard to believe in my perception even when I am the older person

I am super new to all of this (MtF) but this hit home, especially the "little things you can do to help fight dysphoria". I always loved cooking and baking and had shied away from it as part of my denial as it had been viewed as "too feminine for a boy" both at home when I was kid and later as an adult living in a really backwards area. I have been cooking and baking up a storm these last few days and I LOVE it! I do find that it helps a little bit

Starting hrt in just under 2 weeks, really happy to find this channel that helps with coping with dysphoria. It’s really helpful to watch your videos as it makes me feel better about myself as a person.

Thank you, Dr. Z! Informative as always. The first estrogen tablet that I took, about 5 years ago, acted as a light switch for me. It calmed me down considerably. It was an emotional and psychological shift. I was not out to anyone other than my husband but it made me feel so much better about myself. I really would like to try that speech app but I can't remember the name of it.

these are real great videos. dysphoria feels like an unstoppable pit i fall into. i wish suggestions that others have gave would help, but for me trying to express myself just further highlights the differences of my body. an example is wearing clothes i want to, but seeing how i look in the mirror, and how i dont look like the gender i am inside increases the dysphoria. its better to avoid mirrors or any social contact or anything that deals with what i look/sound like.

I find it so difficult. Like, I'm at the beginning of my journey and I'm pretty young so it's difficult for me to get a hold of hormones at this point. Naturally, I cant have surgery either. Its painful to think I have to wait so long to get things done, especially with other life responsibilities. It makes me so sad, then, knowing how I feel, that there are so many people who have no one immediately around them who are supportive. I have everything you would want as trans person beginning transitioning (besides the looming presence of a global pandemic) and it's hard for me. So for all of you who have it worse off, please just keep going. It's worth it. And you deserve it.

Thanks for the info. I'm a 39 years old man with disforia. I just came out to my wife. She is helping me a lot, she also helps me choosing underwear(woman) to help me with the feeling.

Thanks for your videos, Dr. Z. I'm 67 now and have gender dysforia since I was a little boy. For years, I've been in denial but have deep down been on my mind. I finally talked to my doctor and am now taking Spironolactone. 2 days now, but I feel better now. I have told three close friends plus my doctor all women, and they all have been very supportive of me. I know I will lose a lot of friends over this, but I figure they don't live in my body. I do. Thanks again

2 Days ago I had a total dysphoria melt down episode. I never thought it could get as terrible as the day that I had the most extreme dysphoria episode ever. I 🙏 pray that it doesn't get even more extreme than what I had went through. Overwhelming anger , hate. Why me. I didn't ask for it. When I was 4yrs old when I became knowledgeable about gender and finding out that I was a male. I had this knowledge that I am supposed to be a female.. since that day I have had so many trials and tribulation that was caused from getting the knowledge that I wasn't a female. Well as I said I had the most extreme dysphoria ever. I didn't think that I would have one like this. It crippled me. Fortunately I got a transgender doctor and therapists a really good one! Happens that day I had an appointment. I was paralyzed and she worked with me to overcome it. I thank God she was there for me. HIGHLY RECOMMEND THAT EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE A TRANSGENDER DOCTOR AND ALSO HAVE A THERAPIST. IM GRATEFUL MINE WAS THERE FOR ME. The outcome would have been far worse if they weren't there. I truly believe that I wouldn't be alive if they weren't there. Not exaggerating at all. I wouldn't wish what happened to me on anyone. Grateful to still be alive!! Hello everyone n I'm ROBI wish everyone the best!

One of the things I do to deal with dysphoria is by talking about it with my therapy group or by buying makeup or shopping for new clothes. Also the HRT has helped me a lot. I don't think it can go away completely. Thank you so much for you video. Dysphoria is a constant waiting for something to happen to alleviate the síndrome.

Thank you so much for this video. I've been having an awful time with dysphoria, and with many of my family being aggressively transphobic, I felt really alone.

Starting hormones has helped me so much. It has helped me feel more myself, and it decreased my feelings of dysphoria. I still have severe dysphoria about body and facial hair and another area that will not be named. I’m so dysphoric about the area not to be named that I plan on getting SRS.

Hi there! For me works like having some days when I wear things more fem and glam, also wear soft jewelry and things more natural because I don't like the exuberant look (makes me feel literally like a man with heels )I think I need to go slow and day to day do my transition, another thing that helps me a lot is when I have social anxiety attacks I talk to myself and I tell me that changes and all those things that came with the transition are a process and I don't need to do things that makes me feel more dysphoric, thanks for the video!

So helpful. I’m 58 and entering social transition. I couldn’t agree more with you Dr Z that talking to someone about it is crucial. Whether it’s a therapist, a close friend or a virtual acquaintance the Internet it’s helps enormously to exchange thoughts and feelings. Then there is doing the ‘little things’ to address your dysphoria, in my case, wearing a piece of feminine clothing, painting my nails, a little mascara or eyeliner. We know these things are there but trust me people are not that observant, including loved ones and I wear makeup daily unnoticed at home and work. I know it’s there, it helps me but no one else knows or even if they do they don’t say anything and they soon accept. Ok, my changes have been small to date but I recently upped the stakes as I’m trying to come out to my wife but just can’t start the conversation. I painted my toenails a very neutral colour one week. She didn’t notice, eventually I got frustrated and showed her. She kind of laughed and I said well it could be worse it could have been ‘red’. The next week I was down so I painted them ‘red’ I showed her, she didn’t like it but she didn’t tell me to take it off either, so I kept it. This week I changed to blue and joked with her saying I know you didn’t like the red so is the blue better. She said well not really but it is less gaudy. These ‘little things’ really help me take baby steps in my early social transition and so far talking and doing feminizing acts has been my path through lockdown and my gender dysphoria. M xx 💋

I can totally relate with this video!!! So my best friend pushed me to go to my pcp, which then led to an endocrinologist referral, and then to my last therapist. She is my support system and now fiance! As for your second point, after I started hormones, I didn't come out to my parents till about 5 or 6 months on estrogen and I didn't come out at work till a year on hormones and probably would have not if I didn't have to tell them I changed my name for tax purposes. Lastly, as for your third point, I knew I was trans about 7 years ago in 11th grade but didn't ack until two years ago (age 22), but where I didn't ack upon my outward expression, I would paint my toes, shave my legs, wear bras and panties and dress up behind closed doors ever since I knew I was transgender until I felt comfortable dealing with my dysphoria and of coarse didn't happen until I had a support system.

Hi Dr Z, I love your videos! I have a fairly unusual (honest) situation which I thought might help someone out there. I am amab with alopecia universalis. This was late onset; I quite literally lost all my body hair including my eyebrows, arms, legs, I will not go on. Initially this did a lot of damage to my self image (long story) however now I am actually grateful. The side effect of the codition is that I naturally have very soft skin and the dysphoria of my appearance changing radically from what I was used to now has morphed to help me exterbally look none binary and internally fits with a person I am much happier being. WIthout being able to hide my true self behind a beard and buzz cut hair, I had to come to terms with the person I actaully wanted to be. I guess nature gave me a gift of experiencing a radical change without medical intervention. What I can say from this is for me massive changes in appearance were hard initially but the results, however they came about, resulted in a good outcome at in the end Learning to come to terms with fundamental change helped me accept taking on new changes and challenges. As I say, a pretty unusual situation but I felt it was time I shared just in case these insights help someone out there.

Im very dysphoric about my voice and found that doing vocal exercises help immensely. However having the apps didn’t help so much for me personally. It made me feel so intimidated working on it and seeing how deep my voice is in actual numbers. I’ve gotten better results doing it without the app. Not as much feedback, but it helps me not put so much stress on numbers and pitch but more focus on resonance and vowel formations. Hope this helps anyone with strong vocal dysphoria

Dr Z -- Always gives useful advice and the best online gender therapist. Dr Z suggests you need a support group, even if it is Dr Z online. Number 2, if transitioning is for you, is to start hormones. Low doses of estrogen will not cause physical changes but will relieve dysphoria.Number 3 is to engage in any type of behaviour to express who you are, eg, like changing your title to Miss; wearing women's panties and stockings; hair removal; practice voice therapy; makeup. So there is lots to do!

I'm nonbinary, and what I've found helps is wearing subtly nonbinary themed stuff like pins. It helps me feel like I can signal my identity to people.

Go figure, instinctively I've been thinking about using small quantities of hormones to make me feel better as first step for the longest time. That's what my guts were telling me. I've used items under my wardrobe at times before. It definitely helps! Hair removal(laser)has been a dream of mine for the longest time, as well. Thank you, Dr.Z

Hi thanks for this info. I am a 55 year old transwomen who only can live in my preferred gender once and a while. My family (wife & kids know but don't like or support) so I live a double life when I am alone. My dysphoria when in male mode in not very high as I have lived a lot of life as a retired soldier fully embracing the overly masculine side, but a way I often remind myself in my headspace is that I self talk to myself as the girl I am in my head. I also maximize my time when available as a women or I wear articles of clothing under my masculine clothes. This helps me. Thanks again for your videos.

My little nail saga continues. First few weeks it was just my toes and my wife kind of came to expect a new colour on a Friday or Saturday. Then I had a rough day and did my fingernails to just at weekend when we were alone. Both were plum red. I told her it would come off on Sunday lunchtime but to my amazement we went for a walk in the forest on Sunday morning and she was ok holding hands and when it came to take it off on Sunday afternoon she said if it made me feel better then I could just replace the colour with **clear**. This is a link to one of your other blogs Dr Z **Acceptance and Support**. M xx 💋

I´m afab genderfluid and have thought about voice training for a few weeks now ecause I don´t wanna take hormones. Thank you so much for the reommended apps! I just tried one and it was great. I think for the long run it´s a good idea to get help from a professional but for now it helps me getting a better feeling for my voice. Seeing that I can reach "androgynous" and even "masculine" frequences was so... amazing 💓 Thank you so so much! Also I just discovered binding tape (safe way to bind) again after forgetting about it because I didn´t have enough money to buy it and if I can I´m gonna buy some next month and try it out. Most of the time I wear a sports bra or no bra and even the spots bra is too much sometimes so I definitely could never wear a binder (+ it would be difficult to afford) and nowing that binding tape could help me out makes me hopeful.

Thank you for all you do.You are helping alot of people.

I wasn't aware of the voice apps, thanks! I use affirmation audio/videos and meditations, and I recite them using my feminine voice

I know people keep saying you look like Edna Mode but I showed a pic of your hair to my stylist and asked for something like it. Thank you for all your help.

Wow I came up as high end male/ low end androgyny on that voice pitch analyzer speaking in my normal voice. No T, no surgery. I was surprised at how pleased the results made me feel.

Her aesthetic is very unique. I don't know if it's the hair, the glasses, or the ear rings, but I'm mesmerized.

Ive been treating my dysphoria with 'nair' its amazing how life without chest hair has made me feel. I agree.. a little under garment switch helped me. All my love 💘

I’m MtF and I changed my name to Sara even though I don’t pass, and it feels like such a relief to never have to deal with my deadname, never hear it, never see it in writing, and Zi get euphoria everytime I write my signature. Surprisingly, when I’m not passing, then I thought it might put me, or that it might cause me to get misgendered less, but actually people just think I’m a guy named Sara. So, I guess the moral of the story is that you can have a female name even if you live as a dude

Thanks for the info, especially regarding my voice. When I speak into my Boss TU-30, it says the pitch is G#3, just below the "normal" A3 pitch for a woman. However, to me, my voice doesn't sound "feminine" (or it does and I don't like how it sounds :)). Also, it's good to get solid advice from a professional with a Ph.D. You tube advice is often "all over the map". :)

I have gynacomasteia so have developed breasts. I feel as if my body is telling me that I am a woman. I wear women's underwear at work, have begun to remove body hair, pluck my eyebrows and wear clear nail varnish . I agree totally with this video and, as soon as I can, I will start hormones.

I wear undergarments, and paint my toes. It helps a fair bit, but by far the biggest help has been talking.

I have been tucking everyday for 14 months. At first it was exciting and I was overly conscious, now it is just natural and a part of me. I recently started laser hair removal of nearly all my body. Although at 60 years old, those pesky gray hairs remain. Finally, I am wearing a transgender rope bracelet outside of work. Each brings me comfort and a reminder of what brings me happiness.

6:06 ... yup it does help a lot, regardless of how much or little it may be, I know even before I realized and accepted who I am I started off with very small things like at first I would just put on nail polish onto just the small toes and I didn't know why but I felt better, then I started doing all the toes when the one wasn't enough, then I started wearing panties underneath my men's underwear occasionally, then more frequently, once I started to accept who I am and what I need to eventually do I realized why I was doing what I was doing and right now as I am working on building those social support groups and am working on talking with a therapist to help me figure out what I really want to do and what is right for me now I do a bunch of small things that no one notices but still helps me while I have to continue hiding who I am as I build those networks in order to be safe when I do come out, I now paint my toes different colors every few days, paint my nails clear for when I am going out or with different colors when I am home where no one is judging me (that tactile feel of the nail polish is so calming to fidget with when I start having issues because it is something I can feel without having to look), I pretty much exclusively wear panties where the only time I put on male underwear over them is if I am going into a job interview but otherwise I hate wearing men's underwear at all now, and I will put on light mascara to where it isn't really visibly noticeable but I can still sense it and know it is there. Just little things that no one is going to notice but helps me remember I am in the process of working towards being able to be myself, I am going to eventually be who I need to be, but that I need to do it at a safe rate to where I can have the appropriate networks set up so that I have the support I will almost certainly need during the transition time when things seem dark and hard to get through that way I can be safe and continue forward as a pose to being in a dangerous situation or chickening out of allowing myself to be me when I am right at that last little push before I make it over the top of that extremely hard hill to climb when things start getting easier. It is just little reminders just to be able to get through without giving up that help so much.

great video! thank you

Hanging out with people who are like me or support tremendously helps me with my dyshporia. But sometimes my frens are not there so i think I'll try the wearing things under my clothes so i can feel better.

Thank you for very useful video. Yes, I was doing cross dressing since childhood and it was continued after marriage with the help of my wife. But recently when I took her to a psychiatrist for my Gender Diaspora assessment she was completely shocked and she is not ready for my trasition. But now I strongly agree with my inner voice and want be a complete female for rest of my life ❤️. Since 2 month I started wearing sports bra at work place as well as at home. Also wearing unisex earrings at work place. Started participation in LGBTQIA community, growing hairs and had discussed with dermatologist for facial and body hair removal. One step everyday will help us to reach our goal 😘.

As I am not sure the direction that's best for me right now, I have used meditation, yoga and roleplaying to cope in the past. Yes, I used D&D to help because I can be whatever I identify with and act from that. One of my favorite characters was a lady ship captain who was in love with the ship's doctor. Also, for me, I believe in the idea of a soul as a transcendent, eternal part of one's self that, for me, reincarnates. I find some comfort in the idea that I am not the male body but a spiritual being that takes on gender like underclothes and the body like outer clothes. Meditation helps me keep perspective and find a place of peace. Yoga helps me feel somewhere in between because I have to acknowledge my body but it's such a gender neutral activity (sometimes feels feminine) that it helps me if I'm having issues that day.

Started hrt 5 years ago. I had a beard and no female clothes. Took away all my depression and stress. As my body changed I cut my beard off and slowly started wearing female clothes. Did plan on transitioning my Dr just wanted me to try estrogen. I felt so good like the way I thought antidepressants should work but didn't for me. Went to jail for 3 months and didn't get my hrt there and they wouldn't let me shave. It was horrible because my gender dysphoria came back glad to be out and back on my estrogen and progesterone. My body dosent make testosterone so I never needed a blocker. Love the videos - Josie

I needed this! 💙😢

I've been struggling a lot w my dysphoria and I hope I can go on T someday. My college's LGBT center felt awkward too but I do have a few supportive friends. My family is also unsupportive and I kind of feel trapped at the moment. I just hope things can work out for me it's been tough.

I’m a non binary people who has dysphoria over things like my chest, curves and voice. I have trained my voice to be at a lower tone that I am more comfortable with but because I’m not yet out to my family I can’t get a binder or anything that will help me with my other major issues. My solution is to wear a sweater if it’s not blazing hot out or a shirt I feel good in. Usually those kinds of shirts are black or have some sort of graphics that hide my curves so it helps a lot. When it comes to other things like being misgendered or just not having a good because of my dysphoria I usually do something to keep my mind off it like playing bass, hanging out with my dog, talking to my best friend about it or playing video games. I know I’ll have to build up the courage to face these things directly but until then these things help me.

Lovely video Dr. Z. I too struggle with dysphoria as of late quite a lot mostly about my body shape and hair ewww 😂 but I do find it relaxing to wear my lingerie everyday and research I research transgender books and videos of my soon to have surgery and that helps too thinking about the future and putting the past behind me

I love your approach and attitude. your videos are being well received in the International Transgender Health facebook group. keep up the good work!

I began seeing a therapist over my GD on Jan.12. Since then, I've began slowly integrating my true self into the real world. With no HRT at this time, I find solace in applying minor adjustments to my style. For example, as a guy I've kept a scraggly beard for the last 5 or so years. I have since shaved it off and reinstalled my labret piecing from 2009. Alongside that, I pierced my ears and started moisturizing my face daily. I have also straightened my jaw length hair, that previously I kept under a beanie or hat. I've always kept my brows tidy because I have a monobrow that I'm not okay with. All of these tiny details, collectively, have dramatically altered my facial appearance! I've even had a friend say "He looks like a woman!" As I gaze upon myself in the mirror, I'm starting to see the woman within for the first time in my 29 years alive. I used to avoid mirrors like the plague, now I cant stop "checking myself out." 😎 It's all bringing me so much euphoria, because I've always hated the way I look until now. I can't even imagine the joy when I start wearing makeup daily!

thanx for all this good tips

Thank you Doctor you look beautiful 🥰

i’m 12 and have horrible dysphoria thankyou so so so so so much

Transition was never in the cards for me. I was stuck with a brain body mismatch (and yes CT scan confirmed it) so instead of building a persona I built a man, a twin brother who shares his body with me. As his body got bigger I stayed small inside him. He is my everything and we take care of each other. I know it's just a coping strategy but over the years the more real I make him the easier it becomes to live as a man.

Getting my ears pierced and wearing earrings helped me on a daily basis. Wearing bracelets also helped.

Using the clothing idea is something that works very well for me ! I use 2 pairs of Craft Greatness Waistband to make my crotch flat enough. And when I'm at home I use a pair of short leggings.

6 month on T guy here... My dose is SOOOO low bc I use testoesterone gel is not even noticable. The only effect I had on T is mental. I am much more productive, my mental dysphoria is significantly less. However sometimes I still need these videos

Well I totally adore how you explaine all the things just to make our maps more clear for us so thank you so much. I am unable to find the answers if I am trans or not. I don t even know if I like my beard or not. I feel like it fitst to my face I mean the shape of it but I also don t want to be pronounced as a male by someone I like. For the last 10 years yes 10 years I ve been trying to find the answers and its taking more time as I feel coward or insecure about being less trans or not gonna be pretty. Offf I assume I will put this topic again on behind of my mind and gonna live my next day as I will feel again something is not right. I am also fat, so confused if this feeling comes from the fact that I don t like my body or my gender. So hard to answer. Thanks for your time to read

I wish there was anything I could do. I have a good friend to talk to, and I recently went to the local support group. I still have to wait for HRT, and it may very well take a year or longer till I get it. I'm already out almost everywhere, though most people know me as non-binary and don't yet know that I'm a demi-man/non-binary man. I'm wearing affirming clothes as much as I can afford, it's not exactly clothes that make me feel good-looking, but it's something. Binding isn't always really helping my dysphoria, as the pressure of the garment is a reminder that you "need something", I'm kinda sensitive to pressure and have back pain and it makes you sweat more and the sweat situation is making me more dysphoric. I just... I feel so dysphoric about things like my body shape, how my skin feels, how I smell (I guess for this I can say that perfume/deodorant of your gender can help a bit, it's just not always great when you have sensory sensitivities), top and bottom dysphoria, and just... idk, I just feel like having a cycle of up and down hormones is so wrong, I just hate having female hormones in my body, I feel like they are making me feel wrong. It feels like nothing I can do right now would really have similar effects to HRT, which also change your brain chemistry and help your emotions and sensations be more in line with your gender identity. It's just, it kinda makes me upset all the time. I used to be not in touch with my body, but since I tried to do so (since that is what psychology said would make things better) I got more and more upset and uncomfortable and now I can't turn it off. Things that would make me feel better like working on skills and doing exercise I just can't focus on because I get upset with gender dysphoria. It's so hard to cope. I feel like all I'm doing is waiting and wasting my life away.

As a transgirl Ill say that keeping up with body shaving is something TREMENDOUSLY important to do and keeping up with, cause dysphoria and depresion because of it gets you on a passive/lazy mood and that tends to snowball for you to dont do it and that makes you feel worse and the cycle repeats. Forcing yourself to keep up your body looking as likable for you as possible has an enourmous positive impact and I feel like that usually is not addressed enough for us transgirls, at least not that directly. Also doing something like wearing toenail polish on winter helps a lot and if you happen to have a day or more alone at home, make the most of it cause the privacy you have in those to be yourself is something youll rarely get on average and is also easy to forget the potential they have. Hope this works, at least, those are things I would tell to myself if I could hehe

She talked about hair removal but if you are FtM or FtNB like me it really helps me to grow out my hair. First of all it’s easier to deal with and second when I do feel more feminine sometimes I shave and when I don’t I let it grow back (I use any pronouns but prefer they/them btw)

aaahh dysphoria has been KILLING me right now and this helped so much

Putting on makeup is my number one way to fight off dysphoria. Or wearing a dress when I'm home. My wife is understanding, thankfully. But when I'm out I've found wearing women's clothing that aren't obviously feminine very helpful. For example I wear women's jeans all the time and I have several tops that are feminine but not obviously so.

Some people know what I am but we never talk about it. It is the elephant in the room. My wife knows about me because I used to tell her about it. But she was not happy about it. So we also avoid the subject and I crossdress behind her back.

i recently started wearing very colorful shirts cute pants and the underwear again to help ease the dysphoria without being obvious, it works out cause i used to dress in colorful stuff when i was a kid so its not super outside the norm for me, and the underwear is under the clothes so no real need to worry about any family making comments about it. i was very interested in starting hormones before i fully understood what dysphoria was. now that i understand it better, im longing for it. I also like to paint my nails black and do black eyeliner without any other makeup to help ease my disphoria, ive been doing that since middle school without understanding why it made me feel so much more comfortable with myself. black is pretty neutral for nail colors, you wont get as much bullying from being a biological male and wearing black nail polish as you do when wearing pink or purple. you'll still get some comments but no ones gonna know for sure unless you tell them. id rather get called a goth or emo kid than the F word. maybe because the F word is biological sex based and "emo" or "goth" doesnt specifically point out my biology so i dont feel as much dysphoria from that comment. my dad still says things like "are you wearing makeup??" whenever he sees me with eyeliner on tho, so sometimes i just do the nails, slightly feminine clothes and the underwear so im not making him feel uncomfortable to make myself comfortable. oh yea and letting my nails be kinda long, i still try to take good care of them, file them down on the corners especially so they dont catch on my clothes and keep them clean, and ive liked having naturally longer nails since i was little so thats not a bother for people either. never understood why i like to keep them long but now that i do i dont trim them all the way down unless i really really need to cause of a broken nail usually, i really dont like having uneven nail lengths.

Something that I find helps me with gender dysphoria as a trans guy is doing things that boys my age do. Stuff like playing video games or using the same jokes they use, usually small stuff since I don’t really like sports. Blending in with other boys helps me feel more like a cis boy, especially because I enjoy doing that kind of stuff. Obviously that doesn’t help my body dysphoria but in terms of social dysphoria it helps me.

Dr.Z At almost 70 yrs of age now and transitioned (M2F) 3 yrs ago I'm STILL dealing with it. It comes and goes to be sure. This is my 3rd time (and last) and have some SRS (top surgery) and facial hair removal is still ongoing. On HRT about 18 months now. I'm wondering in the future if you could address how we older girls deal with it and the issues of a 70yr old body and female adolescence caused by HRT? (70 trying to be 17) That seems to be a real problem with me lately. Thanks much Carolyn

I can't use estrogen for medical reasons. I am looking for other ways to cope with gender dysphoria. I dress 👗 in my favorite outfits and walk around in them ALL DAY. I am starting voice lessons and have joined a support group. It's tougher when you can't have estrogen to help. ROBI

I'm doing all these things and my dysphoria is about as bad as ever these days. I'm resigned to this being an untreatable condition as I cannot afford surgery and am applying for welfare benefits and my occupational pension at 47 because my dysphoria and the accompanying anxiety and depression now prevents me working

Is there a truly effective way to have facial hair removed? I would so love to have mine gone permanently! And do you know whether there is a way to get Medicare/Medicaid to pay for it? I'm really loving your videos and what I'm learning from them! Thanks!

I'm going to try to get a binder soon

I know I need hormones, even before truly questioning I already hated what testosterone was doing to my body and I remember describing it as a "disgusting hormone", and when I saw the effects of estrogen I noticed they were all things I always knew I lacked and needed to improve (guess what, it's not possible whithout hrt) before knowing they were tied to the hormones. More than any social stuff I need to feel in my body and what I have doesn't feel like it. Now the problem is that in my country (Portugal) we can only start hrt after 2 years of psychological therapy and I don't think I can take 2 years of consiouly knowing this problem/need and be unable to do anything

PROUD TO BE DIFFERENT! Why Am I Me, Or Should I Be You Am I The One, Or Are We Two Am I HIM Or AM I HER On This Point, I Defer Who Is Right, Who Is Wrong If I'm Weak, If Not, I'm Strong Crave To Live, Yearn To Die The Question Is Always, Why Live To Hate, Hate To Live Bear Malace, Or Forgive Who Would Care If I Wasn't Here Anyone Bother To Shed A Tear One Mouth Less To Feed One Soul Less To Need My Right To Be Gay, YES, I SAY!! In The Wrong Form, THAT'S HOW I WAS BORN! With Love To Everyone Who Is Proud To Be Different! By Random Act Of Kindness. .

I find hard to decide if I should start taking hormones when starting collage or wait until I graguate because i dont know if i will be able to do both hormones and social changes and also study for collage, but then agin acting (dressing and when I talk to people) like my birth gender brings me a lot of stress, anxity and sometimes even emotional pain. So i am interested in hearing profesional advice Ps. Sorry for spelling mistakes English is not my first language

Hi Dr Z I’ve been wearing woman’s underwear from top to the bottom every single day also leggings, tops some times period pads but it’s not enough and end of the day make me more depressed and upset. I feel I need more than that. What do I do to feel right and get me out of dungeon?

I've never had gender dysphoria and now I might have it but I'm not sure. I've been questioning my gender for months (I was born female) and I started thinking about my chest. I've never had an issue with it and now I can't tell if I'm overthinking or if I actually have an issue with my chest. I bought a binder and that helps but sometimes I still wonder what it would be like to not have breasts, even though I wouldn't want to make a mistake I can't reverse.

hi Dr Z, I'm currently going through an episode of gender dysforia and these episodes often happen when I compare myself to other women I absolutely envy.. Is it possible for gender dysforia to be tight together with wanting to be pretty? I'm so uncertain because part of me is so very uncomfortable with being male but also part of me likes being a cute boy who looks pretty, cute, soft.. Thanks a lot for all your help to us here on youtube

I have been underdressing for many years. I do find that it helps, but it is just a cope.

I dont have to much of a support system but it's good enough

I like your glasses

I have gender dysphoria and i am too young to “change” and my parents are transphobic I am 14 and I have to wait many years to actually do anything and I have not came out yet. This video has helped but if you have anymore advice please tell me! Also I am a new subscriber...!

Alongside all those things DR Z has mentioned another thing that has helped me tremendosly is my hair. I know this might not be an option or everyone, I am speaking from a somewhat privileged position. I stopped shaving my body hair one year before I came out. I trim it if it gets "too long" and I grew out my pixiecut into a wild rockstar mane. I focus on healthy hair but not so much about how it looks. Now I like looking in the mirror alot more, the pixiecut highlighted my round faceshape and my cheekbones...I looked cute (not a bad thing, just not what I wanted). I also did an undercut on myself like I see on lots of cis-guys with long hair so when I tie up my hair I don't have those cute little whispies that frame the face. I cannot match a beautystandart for non-binary people and there is always going to be someone that tells me that I look "too feminine" to "pass" as androgynous. But those comments are either said deliberatly to hurt me or to legitimize derogatory behaviour (the whole "I treat you like a woman because you look like one" bullshit) which is so funny to me because before I came out people told me so often that I "don't behave like a girl" or that I am "too masculine" etc. What matters is that I look at myself and see someone androgynous and my hair is a big part of that. Also I cannot tell you how happy I am about the hairgrowth that T gives me . I noticed that I have a blond fuzzy mustache on my upper lip the other day and I burst into tears. I have never felt this euphoric about getting to be in MY body before. I love my hair!

Getting a Really Short Haircut in a stereotypically male style, growing out My Leg Hair, Underarm Hair and since I have PCOS Chin\ Neck\ Upper Lip Hair, wearing clothes stereotypically for males, wearing stereotypically male scents deodorant, shampoo, body wash and perfumes and colognes and changing My Name on My Mail, with My University unofficial name to call me before the name change ceremony, also pronouns unofficial before gender maker change and name and pronouns with friends and family and fellow campers at an LGBT Youth Camp (If you can go to one, please go, it's a lot of help, I'm 30 years old and this year coming up is My Last as a Camper, I have also gone two other years in 2015 and 2018 and could have gone and really wish I did in 2016.)

The fact the “what is a woman” Matt Walsh ad came on before this video makes me want to scream and cry. I’m so sick of that man and his stupid documentary every time I’m on KZfaq.

My source of gender dysphoria is my facial hair(the freakin shadow mustache). Getting laser is kinda expensive so yeah... sucks.

I’m n enby who’s having my first big trouble with dysphoria and I just don’t want to be perceived rn because if they will I will be perceived as a woman. I don’t think I can stand that right now. It’s sickening.

I cry a lot inside

it’s rly difficult for me bc im genderfluid and i’m afab. i mostly feel femme but when i feel masc it rly messes with me

I have no one 😢 I need help. Iv been in my house for a week. I can't start anything medically right now. I know I'm talking to myself, but I jist need help before I give up.