Me: Japanese Also me: Can’t use Samurai sword Ancestors: *Shame*

Asian American: Can’t speak their language really well. Duolingo: Come, this is no place to die

Man. As a Korean American myself I found this so relatable. Especially the part where people teased me for not knowing Korean. This was so cathartic

I deeply relate to this as a Puerto-Rican American because I'm a white passing American born and raised who doesn't know any Spanish, so I feel totally disconnected from my own culture. I've basically fully assimilated into American culture only acknowledging my culture just from the fact that I know that Puerto-Rico is my heritage. The fact that people constantly deny the existence of my ethnicity by saying, "you're not Puerto-Rican, you're an American," because Puerto-Rico is under colonial control by the US just makes it even more frustrating.

My Mom’s side: “You’re too White to be Hispanic” My Dad’s Side: Your’re dark to be white” Me: “WHAT AM I THEN?!?!”

My parents: "Learn Chinese goddamnit" Me: *Angry italian noise*

I can relate to this as a Filipino American. I grew up in America so I never learned the language so all I can say is thank you but I’ve been trying to learn the language and I love the food and culture but there’s a lot of times where I would feel closer to my American side but then my Filipino side and I would feel out of place when with my relatives. It’s nice to know a fellow asian has gone through similar experiences.

My parents are born in Puerto Rico and I was born in Pennsylvania. I can say I’m a Puerto Rican American. As I was growing up I get nervous sometimes and I was diagnosed with Autism when I was 3, but it didn’t stop me from trying new things. Love the animation by the way. 🙂

Emily’s Dad : why don’t you have more Korean friends My Dad : why don’t you have any friends

My grandfather : speak Chinese My grandmother : speak Chinese My dad : speak Chinese My mom : speak Chinese My friends : speak Chinese Me : speak English

I’m Mexican who’s a first generation in America and never in my life did ever think someone related to my issues, this video and the comments by other Hispanics made me feel comforted in a way, thank you for sharing Emily, I feel as of this is an underrated topic.

this vid is relatable on so many levels. i was born in the philippines, but i moved to another country at the age of 5 and got exposed to english media. as u can predict, that influenced me a LOT, not only did my ability to speak tagalog get completely erased.. i even lost my understanding on the language and culture. i wanted to re-learn the whole language because i didnt want to embarrass my parents and i didnt want to feel disconnected from it, but i never fully committed. i always felt ashamed when i take the awful flight back to the mother land because of my relative's comments. knowing someone, and many other people, have the same experiences as me feels reassuring. Now that im older, ive been trying to learn the basics and the culture of my homeland^^

"I wish I had white parents" BRUH I SPAT MY DRINK OUT. I'M NOT EVER YOUR FATHER BUT THAT HURT

Me: Filipino-American My Parents: Don’t teach me their language or culture Also My Parents: Disappointed that I’m not magically bilingual Me: ( ; - ; )ノ

The vicious cycle of not trying because you feel like you sound stupid and never getting better which only makes you sound even more stupid is extremely relatable. I used to speak more Macedonian as a kid but because I lived in America (even though I did interact with Macedonian American family friends) I eventually lost my ability to speak well and only got worse with time due to the anxiety attempting to speak brought. I got even more embarrassed when I learned I had a thick American accent when speaking, which singled me out even if I spoke, and I completely thought I had a Macedonian accent when speaking.

As a Chadian-Canadian, this is so relatable. I have always had communication problems with my family. I couldn't even hold myself in a conversation.

So basically Im an asian american, and this other guy is like, “you’re not asian you don’t have squinty eyes!” and I got so mad ;-;

My whole family: African Me: African-American, raised in the USA My relatives: SToP DoInG AmEriCaN sTuFf

I FELT THIS SO MUCH! Like basically all the points she covered, except for my parents being Vietnamese I can relate!

I love the way the grandparents were so kind on the phone

my dad: korean my mom: thai me: *so i started trying to learn japanese-*

The biggest problem is when you are not “American” for the Americans but not “Korean” for the Koreans

I’ve seen this video many times but have never commented. I’m a white American. I’ve never had these feelings. I don’t understand what this is like. But I appreciate and am humbled that you’ve shared your experience. I always want to be as educated as possible given my innate privilege. So thank you for sharing your story. And to every commenter that is sharing their own stories. I’m so glad to hear your voices and stories. I have a deep respect for you all. I’ll always have so much I want to learn, so thank you for helping me.

Wow, I cried watching this. Thank you for posting. The analog of the potted plants as cultures that we nurture is really apt. I am a Filipino American who never learned the language and grew up also hearing what a 'shame' it was I couldn't speak OR understand Tagalog. To some degree, it's true I wish I had learned, but so I could keep the connection to that part of my identity. But when I or my parents are BLAMED for it, it does make me mad and resentful and I think it's just really disrespectful to the reality that multi cultural people grow up with. I have a lot of strong feelings about it now that I am older because 1) I am going to visit the Philippines soon for the first time since I was, like, a baby. And I feel so weird about it, and realizing I am kind of scared about it. I am excited but I am definitely an impostor or at least feel that way. 2) I have a baby now who is white (Russian)/Filipino and I have just all sorts of thoughts about how to keep him connected to his culture/identity, and feeling bad I can't even pass on Tagalog. I am trying hard to make sure he learns Russian since my husband speaks it at least. I cried when you said you once told your parents you wished they were white. Maybe because I identify with it, maybe also because I'm afraid of hearing it from my own son someday.

My mom: Chinese My dad: chinese My parents: why don’t you speak French/Spanish Me: *confused*

Me: *half Dutch half Vietnamese* Dutch people: *U Chinese?* Vietnamese people: *Where u from, white people land?*

im hispanic and i connect with this video so much it has me in the feels ... parents moved from peru to the US when i was not even 2 yet, and i actually refused to learn english as a toddler until elementary school, then i refused to speak spanish and became embarassed by my culture. between 2013-2019 i never had a real hispanic friend. i was in this very hispanic church scouts troop in middle school for a while, but i never connected with the girls and felt like a loner but it's more cus i'm shy and isolate myself more than anything. i was never bullied for being hispanic, when some white kids in a day care chased me around with questions and wanting me to speak spanish, i hated that, but i cant call them racist cus they were just curious little kids. i am hella lucky that in 2020, i made an online friend who is peruvian like me, except he grew up there and moved to the US as a teenager, as opposed to me moving as a toddler. he's fluent in english and just has an accent while i understand most spanish i just feel insecure about it because of my refusal to speak it as a kid. he's really helped me let go of my shame and that what i've gone through is understandable, and it's never too late to relearn. so sometimes we have late night voice chats where it's just us speaking spanish and sometimes he's impressed with how natural i sound and that i've improved a lot. so i feel super lucky for that. as a kid i didnt like going to peru every summer but we haven't gone since covid and now i miss it more than ever :(

I truly appreciate Emily’s mom trying to introduce Korean music to others because I’m more mature and I like to listen to all kinds of music that life has to offer, but school-era me can totally relate to not being that one person that brings in something that makes you “different” and labeled as weird. Especially since I grew up in a time where coming out was not accepted nor was being into anime (other than DBZ)

My parents: *talks in Vietnamese so that I could eventually learn* Me: *replies in English* My grandparents: *actually learn English so that they could communicate with me and my cousins* Thanks grandparents

I know the feeling of people saying ”it a shame” whenever you can’t speak your own language

I also have very similar feelings. I'm a Mexican-American who is white passing. I grew up in rural East-Texas and distanced myself from my culture. I hated going to Mexico when I was younger because I felt so out of place. People would always ask me if I was a "Gringo" and were surprised I spoke Spanish. Even at home, it always comes as a surprise when people find out that I'm Mexican. My Spanish has an accent and so I don't speak it unless necessary. It gets made fun of when I speak it with others. I think that hardest thing for me is communicating with my parents. I find it hard and often struggle finding the words that I just get frustrated and give up. I reply to them in English most of the time if I can. I feel like I can't go back and speak with my family in Mexico because they resent me for never coming back to see them. It has been 10 years since I've been and I haven't spoken a word to my cousins.

As a first generation Cuban American I feel this so profoundly and deeply in the pits of my soul

My grand parents used to: speak Chinese Me: replies back in English Years later I speak Chinese Grandparents: learn english

Emily: crying over an 88% Me when I get an 65% in middle school: hell yeah

I cried while watching this video because I am in the same situation as you ! (yeah I am writting this comment two years later haha) It's the first time I see a video that speaks about the language barrier in a crisis of identity! And it fits so well with what I live as a French-Morrocan! The fact is that as a Morrocan, I do not have to learn one more complicated language, but three (Darija, Arabic and Amazigh) ! It is so haaaaaarrrrrrrdddd to live with, especially when I don't speak any of them fluently!!

I can’t believe how you succinctly you’ve summarised everything I’ve been feeling into this one video. Thanks so much :)

Man, the "I wish I had white parents" bit is something I can really relate to. I never actually said it to my parents, but Ive definitely thought my life would be much easier for me if they were more like my white friends' parents. Ive always been proud of my ethnicity, but I was still pretty Americanized. I eventually realized how hard it is to raise a kid thats basically from a different culture. For children of immigrants, not only is there a generation difference, but a cultural difference.

me: *italian* Me: *doesnt like pizza or cheese* Family: *SHAME*

i come back to this video every once and a while because i relate soso much to this :( i’m a poc , but i don’t feel connected to my culture at all. i was bullied a lot by my peers because i don’t really fit the general “look” for my ethnicity (i’m not even 100% sure of it anymore) , and never really felt like i could fit in. i wasn’t white for my white peers, but not really like the peers of my ethnicity. i see so many people celebrating their culture, or at least knowing about their traditions, but i really don’t and it’s makes me feel very alone and sad when i think about it a lot :( cultures are something that have always interested me , but when it comes to my own i feel so disconnected. this video really helps me feel less alone , i love your content soso much emily !!! 💞💞💞

3 years later and this is still such a relevant experience for so many people.

Emily's older bro is literally the most badass person ever.

American Elementary schoolers then : "This sounds weird! What is this?!" American elementary schoolers now : BOKU WO, TSURETE TE SUSUMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I’m Filipino and grew up in the Philippines but I don’t look or act like it and my Filipino is horrible. My mom is half Canadian and Filipino and my dad Chinese. Every time I interact with someone who isn’t Filipino they are always like wow you’re really in touch with you Filipino roots but when it’s with a Filipino they always think that I’m like Australian or British especially considering my accent. It’s been hard dealing with that and I’ve been going through similar experiences as you had when you were younger. Thank you for making this video as it really helped me feel a lot better about myself! Thank you so much!

This video is able to connect and reach out to anyone of a different ethnicity in America and feel the same bond and struggles. On the other hand, things like this can bring the same people together to grow together. I'm complete mexican ethnicity, but I'm born & raised American, and I can only say broken, basic around the house spanish, but I want to get better so I can be with the relatives and friends instead of being a "no sabo" kid. Everyone should bond with where they came from so that the can celebrate the past, present, and all to come.

"Why didn't you teach your kid Korean" *Responds in Spanish*

My mum: "Learn to speak Spanish" Me: *goes and learns French* Me to my mum: "Je ne veux pas apprendre Espagnol" My mum: *fluent in French as well* Me: *le gasp*

Also, the use of a flower as a symbol of your mastery of the language and culture is an excellent visual metaphor. Well done.

I enjoyed your video immenselly. I'm Uruguayan and for very odd circumstances, I am of two nations, Uruguay and the US. I first came to the US with my parents at age 5 years and 10 months, then went back at age 10, then came back at age 17. To say that I was totally lost and felt uprooted repeatedly is an understatement. I lost friedships so many times I lost count. But fortunately I turned out 100% fluent in both languages, yet with a lot of heartache and emotional upheaval too. Yet despite all this, I found myself identifying with you so much. I guffawed out loud at several points because I could see your situations and empathize with you. I laughed not at you but with you, feeling I somehow knew that even though you felt strange, you also knew who you were and were fine with it. And it was exhilarating to hear what you went through and how you overcame it. Well, just to say I loved your life story. I will subscribe to your channel and I look forward to many good moments during your videos.

"what's your kid been up to?" "she likes to draw" "Oh? Like Fashion design? Animation?" "No, Anime" "*Oh, Ew.*" My Career choice in a nutshell TTwTT

My bully at school: "Why are your eyes so small? Can you even see me?" Me: _Your free trial of life, has expired._

I’m glad you were able to get through your struggles with your roots and became the person you are today. God speed Emily

I'm Indian American (Tamil, to be specific), and a child of immigrants. I have also faced numerous identity crises because of it. Another thing added to that was that many Americans do not consider Indians to be Asian, even though we are in Asia. I am still dealing with it, but am also learning to balance my Western and Eastern identity. This video helped me a lot, thank you!

me: mexican but born in America someone: are you filipina? me: well we were both conquered by Spain so...close enough

100% relate. Me and my siblings can’t speak in our native tongue properly, so whenever our grandparents called on the phone we said 2 lines and then rushed to pass it on to the next sibling. Every single time.

You’re not alone Emily, I’m a Chinese American who have online Chinese lessons because I also live in America all my life. I sometimes always argue with my mom that I don’t want to take classes and even though I can speak Chinese nicely, my spelling and reading is super bad that i remembered nothing that my Chinese teacher teaches me. I’m still very insecure about my culture and I never wanted to speak Chinese at school even though my friends always wanted to hear me speak it.

I cried, because...I have the same exactly situation growing up, but instead of English it was Romanian, and instead of Korean it was Italian...I still can't learn Italian, and all my family members look down on me...

I have a similar story: -I was born in china -I moved to canada when i was 1 -I have chinese side of family -I know nothing about chinese culture -My chinese side of the family knows how to speak chinese -i dont know how to speak to most of them -I NEED HELP

Me: 100% German and lives in Germany Also me: Is bad at German

I went through similar experiences as a half-Vietnamese Puertorican kid growing up. Great to see this video being made the way it was. It was very relatable!

This was so incredibly resonant with me. I've been considering doing a video essay on my own channel about my Asian-American identity crisis, and I have to say, this video was such an inspiration. It mirrors my own journey so closely (with the exception of my being biracially Japanese and Filipino, so no language aside from English was ever spoken at home) that I can't help but see how universal this issue is among first-generation American kids. Thank you so much for sharing all of this. It's truly so powerful.

Heritage: Chinese Classmates: Brings Chinese text over. Me: Can't read Chinese. Classmates: (゜ロ゜)

Yes people, us Asians CAN actually speak English without an accent.

It’s been a few years I watched your channel. Holy cow, the quality of your drawings and video became insane.

I’ve also had a similar identity crisis. I’m half Mexican and half Japanese (My mom is Mexican and my Dad is Japanese) and I was born in the U.S. Meaning I felt the pressure from my Japanese half to be super smart and gifted and know the language and be super in touch with all the Japanese traditions. And for my Mexican half the expectations were also to learn the language and the cultural traditions, but also to make my family proud and have a super successful job in order to support my family. And I’m also the artist child out of my other siblings who want to be scientists or doctors and it just made me feel super disconnected to both my Mexican and my Japanese roots.

Classmate: hey can you read this? *chinese text* Me: no i don’t know chinese, i’m thai Classmates: didn’t you say you were Asian? Me:🤯

"My dad would call out in Korean and I would call back in-" My sleep deprived brain: "American ..... wait...."

I watch your videos here and there when they pop up on my feed this video today was one of them, I’m hispanic and I grew up until a certain age on a island I felt a real connection with this video because it is the same in all aspects I’m trying to get better for my grandpas sake as the English to Spanish is not working well as it used to since my detachment but thank you for making the video I thought I was really alone on something like this…..

Oh man, what a touching story, glad you summon courage to openly speak about it like this. Can relate as Tatar/Russian person, who very rarely and poorly speak on tatar language, but can understand most of it. Identity crisis is such a weird thing. Even if you don't care, you feel bad about you parents or close ones about other people asking them uncomfortable questions.

“A shame?! How many languages do you know lady?!” Every bilingual in a nutshell. Cause gosh darn it you better know at least three languages before coming at me I’m both extremely happy and terrified that so many can, in fact “come at me”.

My mom: Chinese and Korean My dad: A lot of white xD Me: “iM aMeRiCaN” Mom: *no*

I can definitely relate. I am Sri Lankan but grew up in Australia but, whenever talking to my grandparents or relatives, they would ask how much Sinhalese I have learnt so far & I never learnt much at all. I would be really envious when visiting a cousin younger than me who knew Sinhalese completely while they only spoke English to me. I got really emotional watching this video as it felt as my Sri Lankan culture started shrinking & wilting as in your video

Thanks for this video. Just found your channel. Every young person goes through something like this growing up in a different country.

The whole "understanding a language but not being able to speak it" and "language barrier with family" and "being compared to other people " and the SHAME....I can very much relate too (We love you for who you are Emily and who you will be ❤)

My Korean mom: exists My White Father: Exists Everyone: Cool so are you chinese?

This video relates to me the most. I've spent my entire life in the philippines, and still less than mediocre in the language. I still feel embarrassed about how it was mostly my fault that i'm on that level now. I don't know if I didn't try enough, or that I just don't expose myself to it often, but I feel like a burden having to communicate with a lot of my friends and relatives in english. I feel like I don't show enough respect to my country's native language, even though english is commonly used here.

i am south korean too! my mom is also sometimes worried that i mostly speak english with her but she always says if i talk english 'He! speak korean!' and then sometimes i found it harder or just still speak english but now times i trie to leurn more and speak more korean its a nice launguage, (i am not to good in writing enlinh sorry lol) i whas born in korea but we where a travel family and traveld over the world. I also lived in korea but after years my parents wanted to travel again. My mother is korean but my dad is netherlads so we now live some years in the netherlands. So i get your problems too! Only because i lived now in netherlands and traveled my korean also went down. I whas better at it when i whas younger because we where living in korea. but now i live in the Netherlands it went down only i still have the korean culture in my mind. So i have to deal with this with three laungauges. But i love korea! they have good food and everything. So i get your feelings :) its oke to not be that good at korean just like me:) i watch korean tv shows with engilsh descripton their are tv shows to leurn more korean

Me around white friends: Look its the brown kid Me in Mexico: Look its our white cousin

emily: “i wish i had white parents” me: *GASPS LOUDLY LIKE A CARTOON* MIJA QUE PASO

I love that you used arirang as the end song. I remember one time my sister screaming to me "Why do I have an Asian family?!" It absolutely broke my heart, while starting some questions about my own cultural identity. Having pressure from both sides can be difficult. I still deal with it sometimes. But i've learned now to live in both worlds, and not being ashamed.

i love the symbolization of the different nationalitys as flowers so much omg i kinda relate to this as a hispanic american feeling like i should learn spanish because more than half of my family only speaks that. this video is like so good

This comment section is the most worldwide thing I've seen in a while. BTW I'm Brazilian.

Me: *is American* My grandparents: *are American* My ancestry: *Every relative American since the early 1900s* My grandparents: Haven’t you learned more G E R M A N than that?!

This is the most relatable content for me on KZfaq ❤

I feel like it was a missed opportunity that Skill Share didn’t sponsor this video

“He just stared right back at him until he got uncomfortable” Yo legit, your brother is a straight up badass

My parents are both from South India and I’ve grown up in the UK my whole life…I relate to everything in this video so much, especially the language thing. Thank you so much for making it ❤

Honestly when I was younger I didn’t really relate to this video, but now that I’m older I relate to did video on so much more. For context I’m Native American , for the longest time I never knew I was Native, because my mom never bothered to tell me, I didn’t even know until the forth grade. But as I gotten older I get more and more shameful that I barely know anything about my culture, my mom try’s to comfort me about it but it never works. I always feel envious of other people my age that are more involved in their indigenous roots. I know that I’m not along and even my family barely knows anything. I also know that it’s because of the cultural genocide that was bought on to indigenous people and their children, but I can’t help but still feel shame for not being involved with my indigenous roots.

"I feel like older Koreans really like to stare for some reason" No Emily. That's just all Older Asian people...

**Sees dark skin** Person: Are you from Africa? Do you speak African? Me: I'm from Jamaica, we speak english there Person: Which country in Africa is that? Me:😤

I’m Bangladeshi-Pakistani-Arab-American and it’s extremely confusing for me bc my grandparents and parents speak different languages and my grandparents are always bugging me to learn all these different languages and I’m not that interested in my culture (or the clothes there itchy 😭), so I can completely relate

I’ve never fully related to a video before…I’m Latina and don’t speak barely any Spanish. All my relatives are Spanish speaker and I feel the same as you. It makes me feel so bad about myself and I almost cried realizing I’m not just weird and need to get over myself. This is a real thing and now I’m know I’m not alone. Thank you Emily ^^

* me watching anime* Friends: do you even understand what they are saying? Me: No but i can feel it.

me: *Mexican but born in America* someone: are you Italian? me: *googles my name, meaning its blond in Italian*

Happens to me too. If you feel awkward I recommend speaking most of a sentence in a language you usually communicate with and replacing one or two words in that sentence with the language ur trying to get comfortable speaking. Adding a lighthearted/joking tone and a delay also helps.

Thanks! This has made my day.

"yo how tf do you speak such good english" sir I was born here

I'm Chinese American, and I also feel like I'm Dishonoring my family anytime I have to speak in Chinese. I have not been to China in about 9 years, so I didnt have a chance to use the language. Luckily, my school is teaching chinese, so I'm trying to get better at the language.

9:10 Ouch. That kinda hurt.

Oh my god, this is so relatable. Struggling to speak or write Mandarin has made me so scared to engage people because of how many times I get accused of using something like Google Translate or faking it. It's so demoralizing and I've nearly given up trying to learn multiple times. Yet It's hard to feel American either because I was not technically even born here and did not have citizenship until fairly recently. I'm almost nineteen, and I still often refer to both America and Taiwan in the third person, like I'm not either. I'm so relieved to see how many people also feel this way.

"what's your kids been up to?" "she likes to draw..." "oh. fashion designs? animation for a potential career in disney?" "no, anime." oh, *EW* ...wow