This is my puppy, Mystery Author and Amateur Detective Jessica Fletcher, or MAADJF for short. He is eighteen weeks old, and he is a dickhead. UPDATE: At 7 months old, he is still a dickhead. Patreon: / georgrockallschmidt
Пікірлер: 340
@RCAvhstape3 жыл бұрын
Theory: George doesn't know he has a youtube channel. He just sits in the dark and pretends to talk to somebody, and one of his neighbors secretly set up cameras to record it and runs the channel.
@thejudgmentalcat3 жыл бұрын
Or undiagnosed mental illness...nothing wrong with that, it actually goes with the territory of filmmaking
@iainmiller31133 жыл бұрын
Please delete this post? If George finds out it'll end up like a Steven King novel, sincerely LavaLamp!
@IFalling_CHERRY_BOY3 жыл бұрын
@@thejudgmentalcat And writing, composing, painting, singing, playing some instruments, drawing comic books (depends on the genre) and some times, also dancing...
@devolutionary3 жыл бұрын
Is the dog even really there or just a group hallucination?
@sebastian12366693 жыл бұрын
I like this theory, but I'm pretty sure the "George" character is just a mental projection of the lava lamp.
@78deathface3 жыл бұрын
I love dogs, they’re great. I live with a cat, she was left with me by a friend. She’s nice, but sometimes she’ll just sit and stare directly at me for minutes at a time. It’s intense, she won’t break eye contact. I think she’s trying to talk to me with her mind and she’s deeply irritated that I’m not talking back. She is cute, though...
@thejudgmentalcat3 жыл бұрын
Sounds like what Baby Yoda does to Mando
@maeton-gaming3 жыл бұрын
I've always been wary of people that can't befriend a cat.
@jeb16913 жыл бұрын
@@maeton-gaming Can I ask how come? More recently, I've been hearing lots of people who seem to despise cat owners don't give any solid reasons. A lot of the time I hear because of past experiences.
@cygneturesounds3 жыл бұрын
My girlfriend does the same thing. They usually want fed haha
@alcoholandfun2433 жыл бұрын
I was in the same position. Then I read up on how cats communicate and what are their preferences. Almost the exact opposite of dogs. Think that is why people struggle so much with cats, personally.
@brokengirlsrus3 жыл бұрын
I feel like I need more stories about the latchkey dogs
@davidjames5793 жыл бұрын
If I believe American cartoons, the streets are patrolled by Dog Catchers. Never seen one in the UK, but America's got more of them than National Guard troops.
@Daremo69693 жыл бұрын
Used to have one. Was funny cos he would sit out at the bus stop and the kids would pet him and then he'd be off again. Was a good dog
@Daremo69693 жыл бұрын
I think it's not quite the same, the "pack" was only two dogs plus it was way out on the edge of the suburbs next to a game reserve.
@randomtinypotatocried3 жыл бұрын
@@davidjames579 We do? If we do have any form of Animal Control here in NY, it's always the first thing to go in the budget.
@gulliver5173 жыл бұрын
in a lot of rural american towns there *might* be one per town. like no one services my area and we get a decent amount of strays. i catch some of them myself in my area and usually have to go at least an hour drive to get an appropriate rescue for them. lot of the old cartoons lied lol
@gowkie39403 жыл бұрын
The image of young Georg, clad in an adidas tracksuit, sifting through shit.
@hazardeur3 жыл бұрын
a regular image in most english suburbs, i reckon.
@tofu31933 жыл бұрын
@@hazardeur pretty much tbh
@szeltovivarsydroxan99442 жыл бұрын
Somehow he's still bald in my imagination, though.
@JoeBleasdaleReal3 жыл бұрын
“I took it out, did a shit...” Wait...the Afghan hound or Georg? 😂
@timd34693 жыл бұрын
Why not both? Like double the peppermint, double the fun! Except with... ya know.
@mikestanmore26143 жыл бұрын
You got a boxer and expected brains? Affection, enthusiasm and energy, yes. Brains? Umm...
@thejudgmentalcat3 жыл бұрын
Ikr? Boxers are built to run into walls, trip over their own feet, and drool from both sides of their jowls
@mikestanmore26143 жыл бұрын
@@thejudgmentalcat My cousin bred Boxers for years. They're all the same: lovable, clumsy goofballs. :-)
@thejudgmentalcat3 жыл бұрын
@@mikestanmore2614 We had one when I was a kid...loved her so much. That expressive face
@CybershamanX3 жыл бұрын
@@thejudgmentalcat known as the philosopher dogs. In looks, that is. ;) My bro-in-law had a few over the years. Destructive yet lovable beasts. Foul. Slobbering maws and flatulence abounded. But they would die for you. I miss them. :/
@thegreygoblin51653 жыл бұрын
To be fair, there's quite a lot of dogs that can be like that
@devolutionary3 жыл бұрын
Georg seems to be aiming for the Monty Python school of dog training. "Put on a good show for the public, Archibaaald!" *Dogs releases turd* "Brilliant!"
@munkyzzb75043 жыл бұрын
Note to self: don't buy a Hippo
@PunkRJH903 жыл бұрын
It's safer to buy a shark. Hippos are actually more dangerous than sharks.
@munkyzzb75043 жыл бұрын
@@PunkRJH90 ok I'm buying a shark 😀😀
@Pheonixco3 жыл бұрын
As @The Vardon pointed out, Hippos kill more humans per year than sharks, they're essentially dumb aggressive assholes.
@munkyzzb75043 жыл бұрын
@@Pheonixco yeah I never trust vegetarians
@mikepuppetz93 жыл бұрын
Instead, buy a Hip-Tang.
@whizwart13 жыл бұрын
"He's the most antisocial dog that she'd ever had"......soooooo match made in heaven for Georg?
@samringwald3 жыл бұрын
Georg, you're handling the barking correctly (which you no doubt know from the results). When a dog barks, it's alerting you to something. Typically it's a neighbor coming home, or maybe a shifty looking bag blowing by. If you shout, it thinks your barking too. Dogs bark non-aggressively at each other all the time. The trick is to calmly talk to them--then they know you're aware there is, in fact, a weird branch in the yard. They can relax.
@drakinkoren3 жыл бұрын
"Hey Georg, I don't want to alarm you, but I know we've been keeping tabs on this for a while now. The weird branch is up to something. I'm sure I saw it move today. Anyways, your shift to watch the branch soon. Can I borrow a fiver?"
@hoomanm68073 жыл бұрын
"By the way, Georg! The is a suspicious-looking branch right next to where that tentacled pandimensional being usually sits at night and talks about annihilating all living matter. Is that cause for alarm"?!
@Mirphise3 жыл бұрын
I sincerely thank you guys, these made me 😂
@glass7923 Жыл бұрын
*you're
@kirbymarchbarcena3 жыл бұрын
GEORG: The world has gone mad DOG: Mad?! I got dognapped and now confined in a scary, dark place! LAVA LAMP: You'll get use to it.Especially the long monologues he does even there are nobody around to talk to.
@Drew-vn8rx3 жыл бұрын
Its interesting how both dogs and cats make eye contact. I know there's evolutionary reasons for this, but it's still both adorable and curious, they can make decisions based on information they get from eye contact.
@nickbex3 жыл бұрын
Next up: Damian Complains: Georg
@schaffy_3 жыл бұрын
The regretful moments of owning a dog almost fuel the undying love and devotion to them
@veryveryverydave3 жыл бұрын
This is my puppy. There are many like it but this one is mine.
@sickerpuppies3 жыл бұрын
I'm on the north coast and there is this Afghan heading west, if anyone is interested.
@linehanvaleminiatureasylum12263 жыл бұрын
i'm on the south coast and there's an anyone heading afghan, if East is interested.
@spinbirdkick3 жыл бұрын
I just got a dog last month. The emotional intelligence thing is real. He can tell a 'hurry up' grunt from a meeker 'come on, then' half-grunt.
@zoopdterdoobdter57432 жыл бұрын
Well, they have been with us for 10's of thousands of years... And, as pack animals, they're crazy good at picking up signals, gestures and the like from other members of the pack.
@jimd3853 жыл бұрын
0:24..... “There is no Dana, only Zuull”
@agent_meister4773 жыл бұрын
Very clever 👍
@antraxxslingshots3 жыл бұрын
A Crow also having "4" is based on the fact that flying animaly have way less bodyweight, lighter structures and such, because...well...they need to fly.
@tontonseba3 жыл бұрын
Also crows aren't mammals. I don't think the eq is comparable, believing what the strange man in the video just said.
@antraxxslingshots3 жыл бұрын
@@tontonseba y. i bet he ran out of hiptang.
@Rodrigo_Vega3 жыл бұрын
EQ works different for birds and reptiles, regardless of flight. They have smaller neurons and thus more synapses by volume. Like tiny microchips. That's why corvids and parrots act almost like little toddlers while having brains only the size of a green pea.
@paulandreotti16393 жыл бұрын
@@Rodrigo_Vega It's people like you that make KZfaq comment sections worth going throug.
@JoeBleasdaleReal3 жыл бұрын
Sixth Grade? Not Year 7? Did Georg go to school in the States?! Impossible.
@arempy58363 жыл бұрын
Georg has given up all of Englandshire.
@davidjames5793 жыл бұрын
Georg is American, but couldn't bring himself to use the accent.
@TheWiddaC3 жыл бұрын
After owning a dog that is a little shit for a year now, this really had me in stitches.
@stizanley39873 жыл бұрын
I have never seen a dog lit so well than the moment at 0:19
@nijnij39883 жыл бұрын
I went back to the timestamp and yeah, you're right. It's quite beautiful :)
@sunyangsghost95233 жыл бұрын
thats the most well behaved boxer ive ever seen
@illyrian443 жыл бұрын
Georg had his meal laced
@ghiblinerd61963 жыл бұрын
It’s plotting against us.
@Praxeus5143 жыл бұрын
‘Dogs is smaahhhttt’
@JoeBleasdaleReal3 жыл бұрын
I half expect that dog to say “WAT DOING?”
@That-Google-Guy3 жыл бұрын
Holy crap dude- this was genuinely one of the funniest videos you have ever done in your life. I haven’t laughed that much and that consistently for ages. An awesome mix of straight punchlines and sardonic wit that we all know and love. Lol seriously though thank you for this gem- This is definitely going on the list of classics like anything referencing Neil Breen.
@samringwald3 жыл бұрын
Yeah, this was incredibly funny. It was like a standup routine.
@lifeisstr4nge3 жыл бұрын
You're so easily amused
@SniffyTugBoat3 жыл бұрын
going from no dog ever to helping raise a husky was a trip and a half, I'll tell you what. I love her so much, but that dog has made me cry more than once.
@deathbyastonishment79303 жыл бұрын
They barely even act like dogs, very unusual psychology
@runningcommentary21253 жыл бұрын
We made the mistake of getting a Labrador pup early in lockdown and he is a little nightmare. He's loud, stubborn, obnoxious and very easily bored, in addition to being immensely strong. But I love him anyway.
@zoopdterdoobdter57432 жыл бұрын
Dude, labs are SO easy to train...
@mrpurple113 жыл бұрын
Boxer are so expressive. They are the actors among dogs
@fireandcopper3 жыл бұрын
A boxer? You got yourself the dog with the temperament of "Pumping iron" Arnie
@kalaherty3 жыл бұрын
Fun fact: shih tzus are considered the daftest dog breed and apparently if you find a pure bred and surround it within a circle of cans on the floor, it will stay inside for ages because it won't consider pushing or crawling over the cans. I remind myself of this when I catch my dog doing something like staring at the sun or trying to start intimate relations with the cat. ...at least he would walk over the cans.
@chungusbooper3 жыл бұрын
In Scotland, they are referred to as wee dugs.
@dannyd4643 жыл бұрын
Remember never let the lamps touch or you could cause a time paradox.
@bigogle3 жыл бұрын
We're missing the details about when you went to buy your lovely cigarettes with the turd-note.
@thetelegothika53273 жыл бұрын
And on the 24th day of July 2018 AD, Georg Rockall-Schmidt did announce in his video sermon, at passage 10:53: "The Rapture. But Only For People Who Own Short Hair Dogs". And so, it comes to be.
@WelshBathBoy3 жыл бұрын
My dog is very clever, he knows if he hears me jangling some pills in the morning to go back to bed, his walk will be a little later, daddy has a hangover.
@dcmccann113 жыл бұрын
"I like the first bit of that, ... but not the biting in half"
@simonmacomber74663 жыл бұрын
My family just adopted our dog the same day you posted your video about dogs.
@ieuanhunt5523 жыл бұрын
I hate baby talk with dogs. I just talk with my dog like a normal person.
@IFalling_CHERRY_BOY3 жыл бұрын
That's a pretty good dog, dude. 7/10.
@BlazePiffington3 жыл бұрын
They may be sons of bitches but at least they don’t carry a parasite that compels you to buy more dogs… And then more dogs… Dogs is actually my favorite song from that Pink Floyd album
@joshuacalkins3 жыл бұрын
Bird bones are no good for dogs! (Most bones aren’t). They splinter. Nice looking animal!
@PoptartParasol3 жыл бұрын
The only splinter if you cook them. Don't do that and they are fine
@ravenlord43 жыл бұрын
Dogs are awesome. Dogs and humans have co-evolved together for so long. I thing there is now simply a genetic disposition for our species to like each other. When someone complains about dogs, deep down you know it is like when they complain about family :)
@zoopdterdoobdter57432 жыл бұрын
They're our oldest and best friends. 💕 There's coevolution and also that they evolved to take ques from the rest of their pack. ... Also, we both love to be scratched. 🤭
@Nosferatu9813 жыл бұрын
Boxers are awesome.
@jacobgarrison15103 жыл бұрын
This was a great video. Also dogs are amazing, I hope you have a long and loving relationship with your pup!
@ChrisParlett3 жыл бұрын
Dogs are better than books because I can't put a book down.
@painbow65283 жыл бұрын
Hello, RSPCA. I have a case for you to look into.
@artemismoonbow24753 жыл бұрын
I think the Afghan Hound circumnavigating Britton beside Rhiannon riding Epona until Arthur awakens at Avalon is fitting. Yeah, I'm going with that.
@rutessian3 жыл бұрын
@georg Rockall-Schmidt Don't feed chicken bones to your dog, it can die from that.
@lifeisstr4nge3 жыл бұрын
It can what, prick?
@SeaBeast4Life3 жыл бұрын
@@lifeisstr4nge it can die, the bones splinter easily and can cause serious damage internally. I know someone who lost their dog this way.
@mcddragggon3 жыл бұрын
Came here for this
@matticusmachinist3 жыл бұрын
Which leads me to the science, did you know asc... What are you doing?! I laughed so hard i cried. Unexpected.
@hatuletoh3 жыл бұрын
Oh my lord, a boxer? The spazzy kids of the dog world. My daughter has a boxer, whom I call "princess" even though that's not her name, because she gives orders and gets extremely upset when her routine is disrupted. For example, when the water in her bowl gets to warm, i.e., room temperature, or just stale from sitting too long, she smacks one paw onto the edge of the bowl so it clangs against the floor loudly (and spills the water). She sleeps on my daughter's bed, and bedtime is 9:00 PM, maybe 9:30, but if 10:00 rolls around and my daughter hasn't headed to her room, princess boxer will begin dropping bedding materials in front of her: first her dog blanket, then a pillow, then the comforter, etc. I have no doubt that if it got late enough, she'd try dragging the mattress to the living room. And unfortunately, the dog has figured out that the humans watch the tv, and the tv is controlled with the remote, so if she wants attention and gets ignored because the last 30 seconds of the big game are on, she will begin mashing the remote with her paw until the humans pay attention to her. She has on a cpl of occasions, even chewed up the remote when she's gotten really annoyed. She also loves sauces: ketchup, soy sauce, mayo, salsa--any old type of sauce. So when she sees someone, say, dunking french fries, she wil climb up on the table with her front legs to stare until she gets a fry with some ketchup. It's a damn good thing she's cute as hell.
@christinac82503 жыл бұрын
That is the most boxer thing I’ve ever heard.
@fredbloggs59023 жыл бұрын
Good to Georg has accepted his being upstaged by a doggo.
@tradingclasses60123 жыл бұрын
Congrats on your new family member
@Ziguly3 жыл бұрын
I LOVE THE CROW IMPRESSION
@ZeroCiero3 жыл бұрын
He's adorable. Nice dog too. Harharharharhar!
@Mustang_Dan3 жыл бұрын
I could tell IMMEDIATELY upon the video starting that this was your first dog lol.
@antraxxslingshots3 жыл бұрын
I used to be a "Dog-Guy" owned two myself. Used to have Cats too. It all changed when i became a father...it´s not the dogs generally, but the owners...no doga behave these days. Unleashed everywhere sprinting towards my todler, no excuses no nothing...tied in front of supermarkets...child wakes up becuase dogs bark for 30min straight... Shit EVERYHWERE in the city where there is the slightest bit of green...if i had to say, in citylimits dogs would be forbidden....fullstop...buy a cat or stay alone.
@garcemac3 жыл бұрын
The beautiful little brindle beagle in my profile picture is Jake. He was my constant companion and best friend for ten and a half years. I had to have him put down November 2020 because fucking fuck cancer. He was only ten and a half. I miss him every second of every day.
@stuneale11843 жыл бұрын
My family had a one-eyed greyhound/ lurcher named 'Nelson'. I think he was named after the Hungarian triclops explorer Shackleton
@thwiftlythwept70233 жыл бұрын
There's some bits of pieces of a decent stand up show here
@jurassicjaws2 жыл бұрын
I don't know what I expected, but I had a good time.
@matt_cummins283 жыл бұрын
When I was little we had a dog which (I think) we'd got for free because we got it from a breeder who bred (obvs.) West Highland Terriers but somehow (no idea) the bitch had done the dirty with another dog (possibly a labrador?!) and she just wanted to get rid of the resulting litter. He was a little bastard, couldn't teach him anything and he pretty much seemed to hate us (well, all humans really). It seemed to be mostly my job to (try) to take him for walks. I loved him, mostly because I recognised and empathised with his ill-feeling toward both the family and other humans (I did not have an especially happy childhood). He lived to a ripe old age, perhaps as a way of wreaking revenge on us and the human race. What a hero. Cheers for the vid, as always.
@MamaMOB3 жыл бұрын
This is the best thing ever
@yawn18873 жыл бұрын
Dogs do not get beers from the fridge, I've tried, my dogs paws are to small to get the handle open plus she drinks the beer before she brings it to me.
@mentalplayground3 жыл бұрын
Perfect story for Saturday morning. Thank You
@mrdfk94103 жыл бұрын
This video is brilliant. If you ever visit London again, I'll happily buy you a drink.
@derekfleming44113 жыл бұрын
Dude, i cant even right now. Ive been watching you for years. Im like your 24th sub. Youre so GD funny it hurts. Not everyone would get your humor but cats do, and so do I. Keep it up matey
@PureZOOKS3 жыл бұрын
6th grade? George please..... do not pander to them
@markbywords99623 жыл бұрын
5:27 to 5:32 *a visual splendour*
@rakehen26892 жыл бұрын
We need a whole 24 hour video of him doing that looped
@CybershamanX3 жыл бұрын
Georg. My good man. You. You... I love you, man. ;)
@judsongaiden98783 жыл бұрын
A Boxer (a breed that I grew up with) is like a cross between a quarterback and a clown. *^w^*
@TheMurphman19893 жыл бұрын
i miss my first dog :(
@TheLEGOZora3 жыл бұрын
0:59 Georg lived in Hyrule Castle Town?
@TheColonelKlink3 жыл бұрын
Who's a good boy?
@davidjames5793 жыл бұрын
Georg
@BrickfallOfficial3 жыл бұрын
I wish I was a thing. Sometimes I look at things and think "Oh my, how lovely it must be to be thing". Georg is a thing, sometimes I wish I was Georg but then I remember i'm not Georg nor would I want the responsibility of owning a dog.
@aaronclift3 жыл бұрын
I have a pitbull mix named Moxy who looks a LOT like your dog, Georg. Your dog is very cute.
@josephsolowyk76973 жыл бұрын
It was like this when I lived in Bulgaria.
@Aaaa-dt4qg3 жыл бұрын
puppy
@FranzSanchez-ky9up2 жыл бұрын
What a handsome beast! The dog isn't bad, either.
@matt_cummins283 жыл бұрын
Sorry, Georg, I'll have to come back again and try to listen. I spent most of the time watching your dog. Cute!! I'll be back again. Honest.
@dongodongo123 жыл бұрын
4:43 i lost my mind at this
@ThisFinalHandle Жыл бұрын
I think it's emotional mature enough now to show it Plague Dogs.
@protocetid2 жыл бұрын
You want an unconventional pet? Take a look at tegus and monitor lizards. Everyone tends to see reptiles as dull and slow, yet the ones I mentioned are anything but. They’ve actually been described as being a little dog like with the right training.
@josuebartley72723 жыл бұрын
This is wholesome
@DannComics3 жыл бұрын
Show him Zoltan, Hound Of Dracula and see if he seems to enjoy it. Maybe avoid the vampire puppies scene though unless you want the poor bugger to have nightmares...
@TheClumsyFairy3 жыл бұрын
Brilliant!!!
@justwanttoviewvideo3 жыл бұрын
Simply awesome
@noracalzogna9463 жыл бұрын
this is one of the cutest videos i've seen. well done georg
@LouLouCS3 жыл бұрын
You are a breath of fresh air.
@Ace0nPoint3 жыл бұрын
Nice Dog Intercourse Story Georg. This is the high quality content I tune in for video after video.
@nate_d3763 жыл бұрын
He's cute though. Enjoy that, they get big.
@ryklatortuga41463 жыл бұрын
Last Boxer I saw in a You Tube video was Mike Tyson. "Thame thit, Diffwent day"
@JustAHorrorShow3 жыл бұрын
Sight hounds such as afghan hounds should never be let off leash in unenclosed areas. If they see something they wanna chase, they will chase it until they either catch it or are completely exhausted. There are other breeds aside from sight hounds that shouldn't be let off leash and sure you might really trust your dog but better to be safe than sorry.
@Leon_der_Luftige3 жыл бұрын
I thought Goerge would be the kinda guy who owns a raven... Or a chameleon.
@BlueLegend5953 жыл бұрын
Think yourself lucky that you didn't get a Jack Russell.
@unformedeight3 жыл бұрын
Sadly I highly doubt doggos could appreciate horror cinema, much like small children
@BigHenFor3 жыл бұрын
Working dog breeds are smart. Others... Not so much. If he's too playful, get a rescued greyhound. They're too knackered to be too playful.
@TheBeird3 жыл бұрын
I dunno about horror, but I know Die Hard with a Vengeance grabs any dog's attention. Until there is a loud noise. So maybe . . . forty minutes of Die Hard with a Vengeance.
@crazymage96363 жыл бұрын
This is like a high brow red letter media.
@Agent57music3 жыл бұрын
i just realized Georg is at 254k subs. i mean thats good and all, but how do we get him to a mil? mainly because i want to talk about the videos with other people and not just be "that guy" at parties anymore.
@leetri3 жыл бұрын
To get a million he needs to post several #shorts videos a day. The system is super broken and people are getting hundreds of thousands of subs a week due to it.