"The mechanics of bunny driving aside..." I'm SO hoping for Dr. Grande's debut as a speculative fiction author.

I've learned that trauma is when you have no idea what hit you and you have no way to process the catastrophe. You are helping sufferers name things, enabling them to see their experiences in the right light. Not many can do this so calmly, objectively and consistently. Thanks Dr. Grande.

You’re a master at analogies.

So, I know whenever I talk about topics like bunnies driving cars, there’re going to be a variety of opinions....just kidding, thanks for another informative and insightful video!

Who else can't get bunnies driving cars out of their head?

You had me at making a “modification” to the car 😬.

This message was great fun and well explained 👏 In the mind of a narcissist the rest of us are just bunnies in cars 🤣🥕🐰🚙

I was enjoying imagining these bunnies driving until it took a very dark turn. Enlightening and disturbing analogy there, doc.

Wow. Your videos summed up my entire marriage that I left a long time ago. THANK YOU!

Lol lol lol ".... ask the bunny how do you reach the pedals"?! LOL!!! 🤣🤣🤣 You're the best Dr. Grande!!! I love your videos, especially these ones about narcissism I find highly interesting! I love your style, and way of explaining. : )

Aw, I would be so captivated by the bunnies’ adorability, I would forgive them instantly. But, I do like that you pointed out that grandiose narcissists are supercilious and, in my opinion, shame is something narcissists actively avoid because it shines on a light on the parts of them they painstakingly and arduously try to bury deep within themselves. The parts even they don’t want to see in themselves.

I will NEVER be able to forget the mental image of the driving rabbit.. Such an unbelievably hilarious and perfect analogy!

Yepp like when narcissists want to come back in your life because of guilt and narcissistic supply...not because they love nor care for anyone nor accepting responsibility!💯💯🏃🏃🏃

Were you trying to lure me in by using a cute bunny in your thumbnail? Because it totally worked!

I absolutely love how your mind works...fascinating!!

Great, now our cats are demanding the right to drive. Thank you for these videos, this is very helpful.

This is the single most informative video about narcissism I've seen yet! Thank you, Dr Grande!!!

They need to seal self-awareness off in order to survive. That’s the original thought. Survival being in the balance gave them the justification to lock the door and never look back.

I believe this attack the victim action helps the narc keep any hints of shame from entering their mind and experience. The narc in my life readily acknowledges he is superior in all ways, does no wrong, and yet often attacks violently to make his point in the moment. I believe the attacks come to reinforce his sense of perfection when a hint of shame, fault, or error comes near. A lifelong defense.

I was wondering what we bunnies had to do with this! 🐰

I really appreciate the analogy and the explanation. Very interesting and funny. I had totally different perception of shame and grandiosity. I thought that shame is the root cause for grandiosity in narcissism. More precisely, fear of feeling shame... grandiose narcissist makes sure it never comes to that, why i thought that shame is at the root of the problem.. Actually.. both are right: they never feel shame, they avoid it by grandiosity. But. Fear of feeling shame is the drive that makes them feel superior, special. I dont know how else to explain that unusual need for exclusion. Awesome topics doc:)

Finally, a Dr. Grande video I missed. Will dive right in!

These really are the best narcissism videos I've seen on youtube

My ex husband's psychiatrist told him guilt is when you feel bad for the person you wronged, shame is when you feel bad for yourself because you made yourself look bad. This always stuck with me because it's so accurate. My ex never actually felt sorry for anything he did, or the pain he caused, he wasn't sorry for sneaking around or lying or cheating, he was only sorry he got caught and exposed himself as the piece of shit that he was. Great video Dr. Grande. Love the bunny analogy btw. Spot on!!

I appreciate the way you broke that down. Keep up the good work.

So clear and so helpful!! Thank you so much for this wonderful explanation...

This video with the bunnies example is the best and cutest. Thanks doctor 🙏🏼🤗

Very interesting analogy. Thanks for all of your videos, Dr. Grande.

You are the best analyst I've ever heard. So shame does only appear when somebody witnesses the bad act. If nobody saw it, it isn't a problem for the narcissist because guilt is a foreign word for him. Guilt doesn't exist.

I clicked on this video when I saw the bunny, and it turned out to be a marvelous analogy.

This is really insightful. Thanks!

Chilling. You really know how to drive the point home, an Extreme Grandiose Narc doesn't think anyone else is "human." They refuse to take responsibility for anything they did wrong, and that's just the beginning of it. Loved the bunnies. I'd treat them with patience and kindness. I'd have much less patience with that Narc.

Awwww...adorable idea about the bunnies driving! Thank you Dr Grande! 🤗🌹👍

Now one on vulnerable narcissism and shame please Dr G.

This thumbnail is even better than the David Icke one 👌 thank you for yet another great video Dr Grande!

Pretty good. Good analogy with sealing records. The bunny one was kinda cute. Actually helps me kinda laugh at such a silly situation vs being significantly annoyed. Thanks.

Just starting my day and I have already had a giggle.🐰 great analogy. Thank you. 🇬🇧

Cottontail analogy is your best analogy yet.

Dr Grande you rock! I have watched other channels on Narcs etc but they leave me confused. Your videos have made a difference in my life. Oh and I love the reference tho bunnies! 🐇lol x

Makes a person want to look at their side of the street and keep it clean. Lovely video!!!! Dr. Grande, could you please do a video about guilt and shame in co-dependents? I would be very interested in your clinical view.

"Where did you even get money to buy a car? How do you teach the pedals?" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Best video yet!! And, I get so much out of ALL of them. But, everything you teach in this one will stick with me! 🐰 🚙 🐰 🚗 🐰🚙🐰🚗

the bunny driver example was great and really provided insight thx

Yes, I agree. Very good analogy. I've often just lumped guilt and shame together as one in the same never realizing that distinction you illustrated. I will find that helpful. As the daughter of a borderline mother guilt and shame are a very big struggle for me. I will try to remember this. By the way, you have a wonderful smile you should wear it more often!

Thank you for an interesting analogy, Dr. Grande!! The truth of the matter is we only can be responsible for our own actions. That is the only assignment we get from God. For the narcissists, they see all sorts of things with different set of standards and we believers do not need to conform to that, for sure. The moral responsibility has to be carried by the doers, not by the victims. Again, thank you and God bless🙏🤞

Dr Grande, thank you for helping me understand me.

i saw bunnies and clicked immediately i don't ask for much but this is genius and i also love bunbuns

LOL!! Very original explanation ... and excellent! Thanks Dr. Grande!

That analogy was masterful! 😂🐰🐰🐰😂

I always wondered how a person could commit a crime or do something that is wrong and go home and not worry about it ! or not worried about confrontation! I thought it was bravery at one point. Makes me Wonder why i can be callus. I guess don't want to be callous it's a destructive sickness!

I am dead serious, that all you had to do was substitute 'the name of the reason I'm here' for grandiose Lauren. Hauntingly, slight triggering, a relief laughter that, that shit show is over. What a flashback Dr. Grande. But so happy that it is just a flashback !

This was reallyyyyyyyyyyyyyy good 10/10

That was a hilarious, clever and effective analogy about driving rabbits! Thanks again, Doc!

I truly LOVE your car driving bunnies!

Ya i totally need to pop out a self-inflicted "modification" i made to my car in the parking structure where i used to work!

Omg, I can't believe it...! Dr. Grande took the idea of thinking of a bunny when making the thumbnail literally! Now there is one next to him...! One thing is for sure, he has a good sense of humor! ❤ I will comment on the content of the video later, when I'm able to do this. Just this: laughing and giggling was not exactly what I was experiencing while listening to it.

Loved the bunny reference haha :D Thank you very much

This was pretty good...I enjoyed your humur in this lol.

I’ve seen a covert flop back and forth into grandiosity via status seeking. Once, I had witnessed an ex convince his group that he could make them millions managing their bitcoin funds. For nearly a year he hid from the investors while he lost their life savings and verged on suicidal ideology. I couldn’t help him see how damaging this was for all of us. It was so sad.

A light bulb went off when you explained the difference between guilt and shame. So when my gentleman friend takes me to dinner, because I addressed being hurt by his selfish behaviours, he's doing it so he doesn't feel bad anymore. And honestly, I don't think he much cares more than 10 minutes, nor feels he did anything wrong. After all we aren't married and he can do what he wants, which is fine, but it's nice tro consider how actions affect others.

I clicked for the bunny, got information instead :) Very interesting as usual, the metaphors are always useful. Would it be possible to make a video about borderline and anxiety? Or maybe another video on quiet borderline? I know you made one already, but if you have more information or anything, that would be great! Thank you in any case, and everyone here have a good week 👋

Perfect analogy used Dr. Grande to illustrate how the extreme Grandiose Narcissist worst case scenario head of a communal narcissistic community only sees other drivers as maybe rabbit stew. and more cars to tow away in order to put them up for auction later in their quest for more power and control to get more narcissistic supply. To one of them seeing a whole parking lot full of abandoned cars near a convention center with no explanation (happened in Australia a while back} would not leave them concerned at all. Now the same is happening in Canberra South Afirca with abaondoned cars being left behind at the side of the road. In Canberra the reason is that more an more dirvers when their car breaks down cannot afford to call a tow truck dirver and then get their car fixed right away and so often the car is left there abandoned for months if police don't pay out of their resources to have the car towed to a police compound. Very concerning to normal people however In fact it would look to a Grandiose NArcissist while still having enough income of their own to buy gasoline and insurance for a car like only a lucrative opportunity to steal more cars or buy cars for far less at a police auction if they lived nearby to sell at a profit and if stealing them is out of the question because their existing assets and status means the stakes would be too high to risk getting caugtht in a car theft..Right now in Aprl 2020 people who are working on front lines in any capacity to help keep people alive and healthy are working for less than those stuck at home on disability benefits in lock down or out of the work force for now because of pre-existing lung conditions and age. To a grandiose narcissist they can only be moved in an accident if it was their own car damaged or broke down in an accident they were in if they were in an accident in which the other car owner's car got damaged that would be a hit and run accident with them being the one to get away without a scratch or loss of any of their own income no matter who might all be dying and/or neglected as a result of the accident they were in.

I would love for you Dr. Grande to do an analysis of the documentary "behind the curve" on netflix. And possibly the whole flat earth believers and how this could be seemingly so popular. Love your channel and please keep up all the great work. My wife and i love all the videos and watch them together often

Dr Grande having fun with the bunny analogy. :3

Can you do a deep dive on vulnerable narcissism and shame (if you haven’t already). I know they are shame prone, but does shame drive them to change bad behavior? Or, does shame make their behavior worse in the long run, due to causing narcissistic injury?

This is the best 🤣 would be most pleased if a driving Cottontail modified my vehicle. What an honour! Hehe love bunnies ❤️

This is actually a very good explanation. I am beginning to understand a completely new phase of narcissism, like a third dimension of looking inside and understanding a narcissist's brain. (WHOO who whooo) My goodness Dr Grande, it is all so very sad that these "people" chose this way of life, i just cannot imagine one choosing to be selfish, horrible, jealous, nasty, etc, without love and feeling for others, surely love must be the nicer than choosing to be horrible, evil and hateful, why Dr Grande why ?... (evil / hate vs good / love)

Bunnies driving cars!?! I love the thought of bunnies driving cars!!! I'm so amused! Wait! OMG! What is this video about? And how old am I? Five or fifty? I must lead a very dull life!😄

Interesting. I'm in a situation now where my two sisters (both narcissists, according to my therapist) and I have inherited my mother's house. I moved in at the end of my mom's life and cared for her for 2 1/2 years. Had I not done that, we would have had to sell the house and use the proceeds for nursing home care. There would be nothing to inherit. Or at least very little. Now they're suing me claiming I didn't do enough, that I should compensate them for damages and pay them what amounts to over half my share of the estate. It simply boggles my mind. Up to this point I've done everything, and they've done nothing. And yet their argument appears to be that I didn't do enough. I've been trying to put myself in their shoes, but I literally cannot do it. It's insane to me that the person who has done nothing to help would sue the person who has literally done everything, claiming that that person hadn't done enough. Not only did they not care for mom when she was alive, but in the 18 months since her death, they've done nothing to repair or maintain the property in any way. And yet there it is in their petition that I'm not maintaining the property (which they forced me to move out of shortly after mom's death, saying I'd owe them rent if I stayed). And yet they, who are each one third owners, have done nothing at all, while I visit the property daily to keep an eye on it (and it's an hour round trip for me to drive there). The whole thing is crazy-making for me, because they're so bold about it. It keeps me questioning myself. How can you accuse the other party with a straight face of doing what you yourself did and are doing? The car story here where the narcissist blames the victim resonated so much for me.

Thanks for posting educational and helpful material! Please listen to, comprehend, apply and like this video upload!

Excellent video and your humor is great as always Dr. Grande 😀🇳🇱 Do the bunnies also drive in the Toyota's you like to fix?

Thank you again for you video presentation. Learning the difference between guilt and shame and wanting resolve an issue. Helps me understand the person who is only sorry because they were caught vs. someone truly sorry (repentant) from a moral standard.

Thank you for this video and this experiment "in the skin of a grandiose narcissist". I didn't expect they see us like bunnies! So if I understand well, with grandiose narcissism, there is no guilt and no shame if they do something wrong. They never take responsabilité. But if they are caught, they deny or agress their victim, to maintain their self safe. What about vulnerable narcissism? No guilt but shame?

Ok so now am I correct in thinking, if a grandiose narcissist does something morally wrong and they take actions to cover that up, by lying and manipulating others, then it’s not technically lying it is in fact their own personal truth?

Bunnies driving cars..haha. Perfect explanation on NPD & shame. Thank you!

am i wrong to think that narcist have a respect for highrarchies like corporate structure (everyone in a higher position is wurth of my attention and respect everyon under me is not)?

this video made me realise I've been feeling shame all my life not guilt lol

This was quite hare raising🤓

The Rabbit analogy is really very insightful re the psychology of a Narcissist and why it always feels so degrading and dehumanizing to interact with them. I guess even if you get angry and attack them for being so, in their minds it is like "why is this Rabbit acting up so much"

Well said Dr. As a driver I sure don't wanna be that shamed bunny...

Love you master GRANDE🌚🦇🦉💀

Lmao your analogies are hilarious Dr. Grande

great example, the one with the rabbits, my dad, yes, that's exactly how he felt on the road - he deserved different treatment

Talk about alternate reality. When the commercial played it came back on as the toxic relationship video. Well, that hooked me, then once it came to the same commercial, it back back to this video. Weird. Are gremlins real? Lol

You just described my late father to a T... Everything makes so much sense now.

Fear Thy Neighbor has a lot of extreme grandiose narcissits involved in cases of neighborhood feuds. Scary situations to become in vicinity of. Especially is paranoia is mixed into it.

Dr. Grande, can you do a video on whether grandiose narcissists typically seek out political leadership? Is being a political leader a typical goal for a grandiose or extroverted narcissist? I'm thinking of characters like Adolf Hitler, Stalin, certain... presidents... etc.

Cool bunnies driving around.

Haha I loved the example of bunnies :)

Leave a note on the windshield.

I think most narcissists experience shame because they want to be admired by other people. Shame is can be connected to social status. The narcissists wouldn't feel guilt but he would experience shame because of his opinion of himself. But on the other hand the opinions of other People are secondary to his own. If he thinks he stands bad socially he could shame himself because his selfworth is everything to him.

Dr Grande: Huge favor. Can you do a video explaining the roots of discriminatory and xenophobic behavior? That bunny example got me thinking about minorities and immigrants. I happen to count as both in the United States and I sincerely think that extreme nationalists and other highly discriminatory people, act EXACTLY like the grandiose narcissist in your bunnies example (I.e. where "bunnies" are minorities/immigrants). Extreme nationalists think they are the only ones who are human or have any kind of human rights. Minorities and immigrants to them, are not even human. They simply do not have rights... Can extreme nationalism and xenophobia be a subset or variant of grandiose narcissism? Given climate change and the predicted increased flux of climate refugees around the world, this question that I just asked, is more important than ever. I will be grateful for your response and for a video on the subject. You will take my academic investigations on this subject to the next level! 🙏

my mom said "you will keep me happy, or you wont be going to college! i wont sign your papers, just like i had to do with your sister's" and so i left the house because i wasnt going anywhere in life if i stayed there so it was my only chance and she did not sign any papers and wouldnt give me ANY of her financial info for the FAFSA so i was forced to filen a dependency override and she did not like that but i had to... she tried to keep me from having a future she wanted me to suffer for wronging her by moving out and not "keeping her happy" >:( it hurts mom it really does :( she doesnt care if it hurts she only wants her revenge against me for moving out without her permission

Bunnies driving cars ! I love it ! 🐇🚘Toot toot ! 😂👍💯💟

Dr. Grande, could you please consider the criminal case of Brian Blackwell? Grandiose narcissism was implicated in that murder, which was even taken into account in his sentencing (I am not aware of any comparable legal precedent where a personality disorder would play a role of a mitigating - not aggravating - circumstance). There was even a British documentary, available on KZfaq, made about that story. But your take on that case, from a clinical psychology point of view, would be very interesting. Thanks for all your videos, by the way! Yours is one of the best channels I have seen on KZfaq.

Demonstrates how futile any effort to change the narcissist's mind about you is when he still doesn't even think of you as a human.

Do a video on envy

Dr. Grande, if these bunnies passed the requirements for a license, are they a homogenous group regarding driving skills? Realizing this is hypothetical, I get your point. LOL. But I cannot help but consider how different bunnies may internalize this stigma: I guess we need more research re: the stigma of such ilk! Good talk

Can’t watch too triggering however in my family & up until the age of 46 I am still the bunny! Childhood trauma, abuse sucks the life out of children!

Hello Dr. Grande, I have been theorizing about this question for a few days, would love it if you can discuss this topic in a new video! the question would be: how do psychopaths behave when they are in an interaction with another psychopath? to specify this question: do psychopaths fear other psychopaths who have more power than themselves, and try to fight against each other, or is it possible that psychopaths can cooperate to achieve a collective goal? Thank you in advance for the answer!