GRWM| Lessons from a failed relationship; a PSA 📢+ Life Update 🌺

Рет қаралды 36,108

Күн бұрын

Hey guys, here's a little life update including a lesson I learnt from my last relationship. I hope it's useful for someone.
GROW YOUR HAIR WITH ME! Get My Hair Growth Guide HERE: www.journeyto6inches.com/prod...
//Buy my T-Shirts & Cute things: I now have MERCH! support a sister.
→teespring.com/en-GB/stores/fu...
// My Business| Get Your All Natural Hair & Skin Care Products (#SupportBlackBusiness ✊🏽✊🏾✊🏿)
→ Wild Seed Botanicals:
⌨️Website: bit.ly/WildSeedBotanicals
// Music 📻🎶🎵
// Amazon Store- DIY Ingredients, Hair Tools, Books & More
→www.amazon.com/shop/fusionofcultures
//For all Business & PR inquiries:
📧📥: talent@labelpr.com
📫📦: talent@labelpr.com
// Tech! What I film With 🎞
Cameras📹:
NEW Camera: Canon 80D best camera ever! 😍🙌🏾 →amzn.to/2jkoB2U (US)
→amzn.to/2jZB0Jf (UK)
- Secondary Camera: Canon 700D/T5i
→ bit.ly/1EllsBB (UK)
→ bit.ly/1Ja5Jwy (US)
- Lens':
•Sigma 35mm ← AMAZING
→amzn.to/2BNn9Oc (US)
→amzn.to/2iXFsf2 (UK)
• Canon 50mm
→ amzn.to/2AXTswe (US)
→amzn.to/2Adl6Ww (UK)
•Canon 24mm
→amzn.to/2AVVAol (US)
→amzn.to/2AUaYSj (UK)
-Microphone 🎙: Zoom H4n Pro
→amzn.to/2BEVqys (US)
→amzn.to/2BF0zX8 (UK)
-Editing Software 🖥🎛: Final Cut Pro X
//📲👥 Let's Connect On Social
🤳🏾Instagram: Neffyfrofro
🐥Twitter: @Neffyfrofro
👻Snapchat: Neffyfrofro
😜Tumblr: bit.ly/NeffysTumblr
👤Facebook: bit.ly/FusionofCulturesFB
// FTC Disclaimer
This video is NOT sponsored, however, affiliate links may be used.
self awareness vision board wellness mental health relationship therapy

Пікірлер: 247

@YT4Me57 3 жыл бұрын

"We've got to stop dating potential." You said a mouthful my sister!

@chebbiereadsandknits672 3 жыл бұрын

That’s so wise. Another way, “You can’t want more for someone than they want for themselves.” You’ll be carry a bag of bricks uphill the rest of your relationship. Women think we can change them. Only the individual can change themselves.

@Lafilledlapluie 3 жыл бұрын

We had a break up at the same time! It's been so nuts since then. For me the shocking thing was healing and realizing how much stuff was abusive and people can be killing you slowly while claiming it's love.

@FusionofCultures 3 жыл бұрын

KILLING! Sometimes you don't even know you're suffering.... you become numb to the pain. God saved us both sis x

@kearreasharpe19 3 жыл бұрын

You were absolutely correct. I dated someone off and on for years because of potential and it caused me so much pain. I won't do it again.

@dominiquethomas9603 3 жыл бұрын

Girl same...it was a waste of time, energy, resources and my sanity.

@bertaseyeview9422 3 жыл бұрын

I concur, never again.

@lifewithg0lden 3 жыл бұрын

This couldn't be any more "on time". I ended my relationship with my ex after being hospitalized last month and he wanted to have nothing to do with my after-care when I was discharged (but I waited on him hand and foot when he tore his ACL in the winter). That relationship wasn't right for me, it should have never reached that point but I was hung up on potential. I learned the hard way but I can breathe now! Getting back to myself and making better decision moving forward. Thank you for this.

@steviesosa5617 3 жыл бұрын

Dating people's potential is exhausting spiritually, physically, emotionally and financially. In our minds it's like how can you not want something better for yourself. Or in some instances, they want better but not with you, you're not their "preference". It's heartbreaking. We as Black women are slowly accepting this reality. We just have to keep supporting and loving each other. 🧡

@KO-D00M 3 жыл бұрын

Wow, well said. I've recently experienced this and I can say it's very true that some people might only want better -- just not with you. And, yes, being a Black woman adds another complex layer of committment when it comes to finding a wholesome mate.

@yougotgamesonyourphone6947 Жыл бұрын

“They want better but not with you” I have to scream this to people, especially women, to STOP being the come up person because 9 times out of 10 when they reach their potential they are going to go for the person they really want and most times it’s not you

@AmmaMama 3 жыл бұрын

Men absolutely do *NOT* see potential. VERY TRUE!!💯💯 There's *ALWAYS* space for you. But I understand, imposter syndrome is indeed real. The devil is a liar sis👹.

@myafrosheen 3 жыл бұрын

Yep, women often have an issue with wanting a man to change whereas men often have the issue with wanting a woman not to change

@CB-123 3 жыл бұрын

Ironically my husband ‘saw potential’ I was a bit of a party girl, smoking having fun, when I met him, he always felt there was ‘potential’ so he spent time encouraging me and being patient with me and now I have my masters and doing well.. so I think for the most part men want the ‘finished product’ before they commit but in my case it was the other way round

@armamia.1701 3 жыл бұрын

What you said about women believing that we have the power to change ppl. It’s true. This idea is promoted by society telling women that they should support the change that they want to see in their partner, but only Divine Intervention and a true personal will to change, will make someone change. Not to mention that what we see as supporting a change can become the source of resentment over time, because the person then feels like you’ve never truly accepted them the way they are. Great video as always. You should do more of these 😌

@cspann33 3 жыл бұрын

Agreed! The analogy with the car and the abandonment she described resonated with me. Women need to watch and listen to what their partners are communicating because they are telling us the future of the relationship with their words and actions.

@_elizabethliving 3 жыл бұрын

Society and religion

@keyonna 3 жыл бұрын

This is exactly what I am going through almost two years in and he wasn't measuring up to my efforts and I asked myself am I in love with him or in love with the thought of what we could be. We have to be realistic. No matter how much it hurts u have to leave a relationship if it's not adding value to you or your future

@jodimontoute 3 жыл бұрын

Dating or even marrying potential is self destructive. Some people value simplicity and peace while others value wealth and productivity. Finding a life partner with same values is difficult because even your values can change over time. A good relationship is one where they accept the other for who they are and not allow the other to hinder your growth.

@yepyepus1522 3 жыл бұрын

Adding in about potential, don't wait for someone's potential to change. If someone shows bad traits, don't wait believing they will change. When men show u who they r, they're being honest. I've learned that so much over the yrs of a failed marriage

@AimeeBeeluvz 3 жыл бұрын

Girrrrrrl. This whole reflection hit my soul. I went through a broken engagement last year and it’s refreshing to hear these valuable lessons. Thank you for sharing with us. 🪴🤎

@FusionofCultures 3 жыл бұрын

You know your comeback is about to be epic right!!!??? God has the best plot-twist for you.

@KiraiBK 3 жыл бұрын

I’m a few years older than you. I wish I had the wisdom you have now. I’m now there, but I appreciate the way you worded your thoughts on relationships. Take what you see at face value. Don’t think on what could be, just see what it is and move accordingly. You’re beautiful inside and out.

@MaggiePegg 3 жыл бұрын

This felt like a therapy session 🙌🏾 Your voice is so soothing 🥰 Thank God for growth

@Vibesbypeach 3 жыл бұрын

It definitely was. She almost made me cry!

@elyciad1 3 жыл бұрын

@@Vibesbypeach me too

@photogenic305 3 жыл бұрын

Especially with the background music!

@genelloliver2754 3 жыл бұрын

We have all been in that place at least once in our lives. Not to down anyone who's not where you are, but life is too short to be held up by someone who's not where you are spirituality, financially, emotionally; or have the desire to aspire to get where you are or beyond. Know your worth. God's blessings upon you 🙏🏽

@latashapannell7420 3 жыл бұрын

I loved the destination analogy for the relationship!! Spot on

@RichardineC 3 жыл бұрын

Your advice is vital when intentionally dating. Most women get stuck on potential and I had a hard lesson like yourself to see people for who they are and not what you want them to be. People do evolve and change but their core remains the same.

@lifewithg0lden 3 жыл бұрын

this is so true, I learned this the hard way. Definitely keeping this gem in my pocket from now on.

@glorial2807 3 жыл бұрын

“We are the sum of our experiences”...👏🏾 Thank you for sharing Laila.

@celesteperry4929 3 жыл бұрын

Hi Laila, I am glad you realized your relationship while you are still young. I was in my late 40s when I realized how each of my relationships failed. Your analogy was spot on. I am in my 50s now and have been single for several years. Keep living your life, someone will value you and your time. ❤

@smellyjelly8 3 жыл бұрын

The thing about it is, everyone is a potential (in my opinion)... acceptance is key. We are always trying to change someone. If you accept someone for who they are, flaws and all, (after choosing them in the right season like you have said), it's easier to not obsess over the person's change/growth rate. Focus on your own growth and love who you are with...

@janniahevans5200 3 жыл бұрын

Would you please start a podcast? What you are saying is resonating with me so much. Thank you for sharing your experience and lessons!

@FusionofCultures 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you Janniah! .... I wouldn't know what to talk about lol

@janniahevans5200 3 жыл бұрын

@@FusionofCultures Exactly what you have in this video and what ever Godly inspiration you get there after. I just think you offer an authenticity in the way you share your experience that is different to what is out there. Your life and story are a blessing. ❤️

@kaggym6668 3 жыл бұрын

So much wisdom!

@KO-D00M 3 жыл бұрын

Dating potential -- I've done this one too many times and have finally learned my lesson this last time around. It's one thing to see a person's potential and act patiently toward their growth then it's another thing when potential is on one page and your partner's actual interest is in a completely different book! That's why potential is often dangerous.

@noirfit9721 3 жыл бұрын

I’ve married potential twice. Rookie mistake that took the best years of my life. Now that I’m a divorced single mom, life is so much more peaceful and full of bliss. I absolutely will not date or marry for potential EVER again. I will not settle for the bare minimum effort from these men. In the end, I always end up being taken for a fool. I’d rather be alone

@BeautifullyNatural88 3 жыл бұрын

You ain’t never lied. That dating potential will get you every time. There’s a difference between loving someone flaws and all and loving someone with the hope they’ll be who you want them to be.

@mrsrockbison 3 жыл бұрын

yes completely relate to this. My most recent ex I felt that I was pouring myself into a cup with no bottom where I was trying to change him (and our relationship) into something (the potential) that he was not willing to be in that season of his life. It became self-destructive luckily I got out of it after a couple of months.

@sandpikd2213 3 жыл бұрын

Oh Leila, I'm South African and hearing the song in the beginning literally made me scream, beautiful song 🇿🇦🇿🇦🇿🇦

@MsGH91 3 жыл бұрын

What's the name of the song?

@leviticusgillis9850 3 жыл бұрын

Can you tell me the name of tge song

@fikinaturally_fikiswa2925 3 жыл бұрын

@@MsGH91 pls check him out his name is Bongeziwe Mabandla. He has a KZfaq channel as well . Very talented young man. His music is just unique and magically

@fikinaturally_fikiswa2925 3 жыл бұрын

@@leviticusgillis9850 his name is Bongeziwe Mabandla pls check his KZfaq channel for all his music,

@sinethembanondabula2947 3 жыл бұрын

It's called khangela

@Crystalthe1st 3 жыл бұрын

5:25 “if you found this person ad they are, the likelihood is that it’s because they don’t want to be anywhere other than where they are” this hit me like a train 😭

@WhenInDoubt_Pink 3 жыл бұрын

Yes, yes, yes! I literally just spoke about this on a recent video. But you’re so right that people send their best representative but it’s not sustainable for the long-term… Eventually they have to be themselves and they know full well that’s not who you were looking for

@Bizz2k 3 жыл бұрын

Love relationships are the most complex institution in human beings. As a mature woman, I'd say don't just look at the similarities but, look at the dis-similarities; the things that are different and intolerable. Don't think you want to change or adapt to those negative points. They may look minor now but trust me, these negatives may be magnified later on. We women do look at 'potentials' because it's better than looking at those that are stagnant at the bottom. And it's good to look at a man who has potentials but, his direction of life may not include you. If he has a character that you can't live with...then bounce out. Also, if a man tend to dislike the women around him such as his mother, sister, criticise all the females that were present or absent in his life....Bounce out because you are the next on his list of female disdain. The fact is that some men can pretend from start but along the line, they release who they are as the relationship goes along. Some would even want to rush you into marrying them before you realise that he has some characteristics that you can't adapt. Some just need you to build them up and abandon you emotionally. Unfortunately, it's not written on their forehead. You get to learn through the experience. As this applies to men, so do we have women of such nature.

@NinjaLeeful 3 жыл бұрын

The music❤❤🇿🇦 Bongeziwe Mabandla. Thank you for blessing us with the wisdom and your beauty. May God bless you through your healing and journey of becoming. 😘❤

@Mrg524 3 жыл бұрын

I’ve watched your videos since the very beginning and like you said, you can tell that the core of you has not changed. We should always evolve but our core will still be recognizable. We should indeed take people for who they are instead of who we want them to be as we decide who to involve ourselves with ❤️

@moniqueg.531 3 жыл бұрын

It's so true about realizing the season ur in and the season a potential partner is in. I wish I realized this 10 yrs ago. My life would've been completely different. Also ur right about someone's character. No matter how much someone claims to change their character never changes. Recognize if their character is one u can tolerate.

@doctorjones2404 3 жыл бұрын

This was a therapy session for me! Thank you for your vulnerability. You always have space, sis!❤️

@carlarreed 3 жыл бұрын

Ms. Laila, let me just take a moment to express gratitude for your beautiful spirit and kind soul. I’ve followed you for nearly a decade, and always appreciate hearing your perspective. Thank you!

@FusionofCultures 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much Carla x

@michellemays773 3 жыл бұрын

Yassss. LOVE THIS!!!! THANK YOU🤗. Women of all ages need to know we are not alone in the journey of knowing when to let go. Even when we've planted seeds we have to love ourselves enough to let GO

@angel8princess5 3 жыл бұрын

I came to that realization from a previous relationship as well and boy when it ended, I felt gutted for so many reasons. But all in all, it was a valuable lesson and it helped me to grow in so many different areas. Also, I’m grateful that it ended because I know I wouldn’t be on the path I’m on now. I have always loved your chats. Always insightful and little nuggets of wisdom being dropped.

@TheVintageFrancesca 3 жыл бұрын

This video has me crying. I knew it would when I saw the title. Thank you so much for the encouragement and sharing yourself and your story with us.

@sonyblues 3 жыл бұрын

I am really sad and frustrated I cannot like this more than once. GOLDEN through and through. Take notes ladies and avoid learning this the hard way like I did a few years ago 😂😅. Thanks Laila for sharing 💯💛!!!

@blackbarbei7429 3 жыл бұрын

Great and helpful video. I recently broke up with someone and I COMPLETELY agree that women sometimes date potential. I too will not do that again!!! Thanks for sharing 💜

@efhawkins19 3 жыл бұрын

I ‘ve learned to enjoy the moment and expect nothing more. To do this, one must know themselves. Well done Lelia, men stay in the moment, and women, must and need to do the same. Thanks for sharing your experience.

@FusionofCultures 3 жыл бұрын

Yes!!!

@tribejamette872 3 жыл бұрын

Your anology was beautiful and one point. I had a similar experience Thsnks for sharing.

@Gilliane9296 3 жыл бұрын

This video came at the perfect time for me :) thank you for your words and for these healthy reminders to value reciprocity and to take people at face value

@Zen-cx5tc 3 жыл бұрын

Love it!!

@yaaasafo 3 жыл бұрын

love what you said about sharing your your experience where you are. you dont have to wait till you're on the side all the time

@dominiquethomas9603 3 жыл бұрын

This has come at the right time. I have been not dating or anything for the past 2 years and I have been wanting to start dating again. Thank you!

@queadenorah 3 жыл бұрын

Your voice is so powerful, would you start a podcast? I’ve been watching you for YEARS !

@FusionofCultures 3 жыл бұрын

lol really! Thanks so much.. I honestly wouldn't know what to talk about.

@joyfulbliss6937 3 жыл бұрын

We need to also understand that there is nothing wrong with someone being happy with who and where they are. If they are happy there but you want something else, then you need to leave them and go seek what you need. There is someone else for them and someone else for you.

@jogianna 3 жыл бұрын

SAY IT AGAIN! We need to stop dating potential

@sashua4 3 жыл бұрын

Damn mama!! Why you preaching to me!!!❤️ this was so needed. Sometimes we get so caught up in the what if’s or the possibilities we ignore THE REALITIES!!

@myneisharoberson4729 3 жыл бұрын

I so needed this .Just went through a break up myself and this is what I needed to hear.Thank you so much for your wisdom and life lessons.

@KandidKinks 3 жыл бұрын

Loved this Laila omg

@ob194 3 жыл бұрын

Yeah women tend to do that a lot and it's very unhealthy. You can't change anyone beyond the change they want. Some people just don't want to grow up and that's fine but women shouldn't feel the need to want to grow men like that. It has led to so many hurtful breakups and regretful relationships

@TerikaChantal 3 жыл бұрын

Ure so amazing Laila... I can definitely relate on the relationship front....thanks for sharing 💕💕

@FusionofCultures 3 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching T .... I appreciate you x

@nikkimcmahan7935 3 жыл бұрын

Hey Laila! Just wanted to say that I have enjoyed watching you grow into the beautiful soul you are today. Thankful for the impact you have had on me in my hair journey and just life in general. You continue to grow and evolve and I am totally here for you. Thank you sis & may God continue to bless you!

@shontaesalmon7921 3 жыл бұрын

Welcome back sis!! Face is glowing, giving us SKINNNN. I had a friend that went through all that and it was so taxing. I’ve never been in a relationship but I’ve learned so much from my friends. I know I have a savior complex and I’m always trying to “fix” people so that’s something I have to be mindful of if I get into a relationship. But I love what you said about evaluating the person as they are and just deciding that if they’re not for you as is, then you gotta just let them go. If they evolve and later on you come back and those boxes are ticked then it’ll be better.

@FusionofCultures 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you Shontea!!! I pray that God will bring the perfect person for you and you will bypass all the madness! The lessons you've learnt from other and your discernment will bless you when the time comes x

@dorygoncalves6533 3 жыл бұрын

Oh my days... Same Same Same... I agree with every word. I made the same mistake by entering a relationship based on potential and wasted 7 years of my life. Only God to get me out of there, with a scary fake pregnancy taught and then I was like he is not ready to be the father of my kids. Only to then, question myself about where I was going with it. Broke up, it was the hardest thing and also with a break up after so long it's almost like other people are part of that relationship too. I felt as not only I had to explain myself to him but also to my family and friends which was rrrreally hard, being a private person. Praise the Lord I was then patient and really careful getting into anything to be now with my new boyfriend that ticks every box that is even dreamy to have such blessing. All to say, ladies, DO NOT EVER SETTLE FOR LESS. God's plans for you are greater than you can imagine ❤️❤️❤️❤️

@shynes23sh Жыл бұрын

All things work together for good, even when it hurts. God is amazing!!. I went through a traumatic break up in 2020 as well. I was broken & bitter... but God opened up so much for me through it 🙏🏾 🙌🏾 😭 Also, I'm here on your page after seeing your recent nuptials!!! Rejoice!!!

@cathylxlo1205 3 жыл бұрын

I love this 🧡 You are a strong woman! God bless you!

@charlene570 3 жыл бұрын

Thanks so much for sharing Laila. Wishing you the best. ❤️

@shayma7497 3 жыл бұрын

Once again thank you. When I hear you speaking about those topics willing to be vulnerable, conveying your message in such a way that we can tell you hope to help at least one person watching this. All that makes me feel like if authenticity was a woman it would be you. Funny how we started this hair journey at about the same time (I've been a quiet subscriber of yours for about 10 years I think) , because we wanted something more wholesome, organic for our hair and via research and ingredients, it took us down the path of actually doing that same work for our souls minds and characters which in turn helped us understand ppl and relationships better. I just love the authenticity. As I said before, I feel less lonely in this journey when hearing your insights Take care sis xxx

@sharon8276 3 жыл бұрын

You're preaching to me here sis. So exhausting being a learning curve for a dude who's struggling to do better. I'm an unpaid teacher.

@rebeccabrown1727 3 жыл бұрын

Thanks for sharing 💖 Never been this early!.. the first few minutes In has me hooked. Great advice!

@nataliequansah 3 жыл бұрын

Just the type of message I needed to hear at this point💭 ! Thank you for sharing x🙂

@RanDom-bk8tt 3 жыл бұрын

Real talk!!! Thanks so much for sharing! Stay well mentally, emotionally and physically girl~!

@keira.shanta 3 жыл бұрын

This was a profound message and truly a reflection of what I’ve been through! Thank you for sharing ❤️

@LimitlessBloom 3 жыл бұрын

I love what you said about the core of people never changing! Thank you for being consistent and staying authentic to yourself ❤️

@decsage9467 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you Laila. Your contribution is immense. Good luck in all your endeavors. I admire you.

@demi5378 3 жыл бұрын

Your experience was my experience at one time. Thank goodness God had a different plan for the both of us. We both meet who we were better suited for & that was a true blessing for me. I know if I would have stayed the course my life would have been totally different in a way that would not have suited me. Sorry about your edges. Your hair is such a beauty, you could have whipped up some of those beautiful simple braided styles I personally love so much better then those braids. I get it though.....as always thanks for sharing words of wisdom. Things happen for a reason, we have to have faith & patience & positivity. Blessings

@jsspald 3 жыл бұрын

I love how you decompressed this and deconstructed this and I also love how you put your point of view on how relationships can always start off amazing but somewhere along the way people can change, goals can change. etc

@paulinebailey2278 3 жыл бұрын

Thanks for sharing, you've made some very insightful points. It's great you've taken the time to reflect, it's the only way we grow through our difficult experiences.

@lakeiam615 3 жыл бұрын

Girl. This came out on my birthday I needed to see and hear this. Thank you 👑

@sommerskeete5367 3 жыл бұрын

Thanks for sharing because it definitely helps other ppl who are going through the same things.

@benaturalwigs8769 3 жыл бұрын

Loved your analogy. Thanks for sharing such sound advice. You will most definitely always have a space on this platform! Your light and realness always shines though... May God continue to bless you through your journey.💕

@Baatile_Malekele 3 жыл бұрын

Preach it!♥️ beautiful message Laila..🙏🏽 thank you.. I see so much of me in you.. 😍😍😍

@serena_bee 3 жыл бұрын

You spoke so much truth in this video I literally have no rebuttal. Indeed, how long can you pretend to be something or someone that you’re not. People are who they are unless they genuinely decide to change to be something else. True: men really do see women for who they are and not for their potential. Gods creation is remarkable. It’s amazing how men see the world so differently compared to women. We women really do try our outmost to be “fixer uppers”, and I believe it comes naturally so it’s very hard at times getting yourself out of that norm. You were so honest, I really appreciated your insight ✨

@FusionofCultures 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you Serena! The thing is, our natural nature is a blessing... with the right partner, these instincts and abilities will cause you both to be unstoppable. I pray that we will all find the bone to our bone and experience the wonderful riches in union that God has for us.

@serena_bee 3 жыл бұрын

@@FusionofCultures Well said. Indeed. Amen to that 🥺🙏🏽✨

@Blackscubaqueen101 3 жыл бұрын

I so agree with your advice. You are a spirit of God. I am 50+ and I go by character. If the character doesn't agree with what they say, bye and I wish you well. But I ain't got time for it. Take the lesson and grow from it. Continue to trust in the God within you and trust your intuition. We as women always give more than we receive. Stop it and keep it moving.

@jab0623 3 жыл бұрын

I’m happy to see and hear from you whenever you decide to post. 🤗🤗

@kahjoi1102 3 жыл бұрын

Wrote this in my journal because I have never had something (akin to a note about discernment) strike me quite like it: ""When you meet somebody (that character + those core things about that person), if you know that if those things were to remain the same, unchanging (forever and ever and ever), could you live with that? If you can't, you have found that person in a season that is not conducive FOR YOU. You have to go." Thank you for sharing your story and wisdom, Laila.

@lisa3671 3 жыл бұрын

Omg needed to hear this ! Just spoke exactly how I feel

@naisyfro7252 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for sharing your journey . It resonates with a lot of us, me included. The video was calming and you were very real with your feelings. So thank you, more of it!

@rhodealexandre6583 3 жыл бұрын

Happy to see you again Laila and thank you for sharing your experience with us. I am so sorry that it did not work out but maybe it is for the better. You said it when you say “ We need to stop dating potential” or “ Nobody change unless they want to” Also people does not change for other people. If they do, they might be trying to fit into a mould that is not theirs and that is a ticking time bomb.

@jandigray1355 3 жыл бұрын

Well said beautiful.. we women we need to love our self more and stop thinking we can change anyone. We can't change anyone. The person needs to realize that he have a problem to be able to put in the work for change.

@raebeautiful 3 жыл бұрын

Loved this. Thank you for sharing yourself with us 💛

@FusionofCultures 3 жыл бұрын

Love you sis!

@susankelembeck2866 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for sharing this very personal experience in your life. I totally agree with you, you cannot change someone into the person you want them to be it’s a wast of your time and they end up resenting you in the end or you don’t like the person they become. Love yourself and enjoy your life and you will find the right person for you. Respect ✊🏾 you are beautiful intelligent and talented.. Gods blessings 🙏🏾 💕

@charitybunyon8645 2 жыл бұрын

This is beautiful! Totally needed to here this

@iamngozireddie4969 3 жыл бұрын

I'm so happy that you are back hun

@a.y6341 3 жыл бұрын

loved the video . Thank you for sharing those wise words .

@QueenHonestlySavage 3 жыл бұрын

Beloved you are so right about what u said u have grown so much with this situation! Your no longer the person that will settle period! To accept your flaws and what your part was in the relationship but when u know better u do better right!!! You Got This Beloved💯 Happy to see u back! I know your edges are in good hands so I ain’t that worried! Breathe love! How is your mom doing

@jozuavieira46 2 жыл бұрын

The music on the background sets the mood perfectly

@MissMadelineMM94 3 жыл бұрын

Such gems and truths dropped in this video 🙏🏽

@Deajra112 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much Laila I really appreciate you because I needed to hear these lessons as a women

@Thats_MarieHoney 3 жыл бұрын

THAT ANALOGY IS FUCKING PERFECT! WE DO FALL ASLEEP!

@free2Bsexed 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for speaking the truth. I have recently gone through the same thing and it is a learning experience.

@ed000 3 жыл бұрын

Looks like this "person" almost used you as his charity box.....I can relate to your story! Once this happens to a lady and you do not wise up, then you have not learnt and grown as a person!!

@jemts5586 3 жыл бұрын

Such great advice, Laila! Thanks for sharing your reflections, goodness knows I needed to hear it again. I spoke to my brother about my last relationship and he said the same thing. Guys don't (usually) think of potential, but women will stretch themselves and encourage themselves to stick it out. It can be so painful, or at the least, a waste of time and energy.

@nicolebest9722 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for sharing. Thank GOD for Growth. Moving forward you will know when the right person is heaven sent.

@MsFrankiesMusic 3 жыл бұрын

Young lady you’re so right!👍

@verydelphine 3 жыл бұрын

Tha o you so much for sharing this! 🤎 Love every bit of it. I can relate.

@mrsdiane2009 3 жыл бұрын

You are so right make yourself happy you well heal from this season

@ughnotuagainughnotuagain4275 3 жыл бұрын

15:26 great point, but it usually takes a while before someone's character comes to light. People usually put their best foot forward in the dating phase and you'll still have to invest some time to get a glimpse of who they truly are. So? Pray for discernment!