It's funny how back in 1989 Indiana Jones and Micheal Keaton Batman were competing for the top spot at the box office and now in 2023 Indiana Jones and Micheal Keaton Batman are fighting to see who can lose less money.

So excited for this movie. I remember watching the original films as a kid thinking how much better they'd be if he were 80.

Jay telling Mike about tik-tok trends is like showing your mom a meme on your phone and she squints to see it and say "that's not very nice" or some shit like that.

"He wants to kill Hitler and take hiss place because he knows where Hitler went wrong, which is nice." - Jay

Harrison Ford is 20 years older than Sean Connery was during the Last Crusade

You just know Mike spent the entire movie laughing at senile Indiana Jones. His contempt for the elderly is unyielding.

It's like the old Simpsons gag about the Charles Bronson Death Wish movies. "Death Wish 9", and it's just Charles Bronson lying in a hospital bed saying "I Wish I Was Dead".

In an alternate universe, the movie starts with Indiana recounting the train scene, rather than showing it, and Mike is complaining that they should have shown it.

Mike had a prediction about Rise of Skywalker having a time travel plot but he did not factor in the continental drift which is why it actually happened in Dial of Destiny.

All the chase sequences make sense, like any 80 year old, Indiana Jones is most dangerous behind the wheel of a car.

I love how Mike had to stop mid sentence to rejuvenate himself with alcohol.

Wow, if I had a nickel for every time Shia LaBeouf's character died offscreen before the fifth film in a franchise, I'd have two nickels... which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice.

"cut out an hour" has been the most pertinent movie making advice for almost a decade.

Rich Evans is so powerful he destroyed the microphones

True story: I was setting up for an academic conference meeting today and wanted to test the speaker. I played the first video that came up on KZfaq and it was this. Assumed there was a speaker issue. Spent 20 minutes trying to figure out the problem and finally just switched computers. Only realized the janky opening sound was actually part of the video hours later. Thanks a lot you hacks.

Every time Rich is in a HITB episode, it gets over a million views. Take it as a sign, boys.

Its gone from 'is it a good movie or not' to 'hey this 20 second scene wasn't miserable'

In 1989, Batman and Indiana Jones appeared in theaters. In 2008, Batman and Indiana Jones appeared in theaters. In 2023, Batman and Indiana Jones appeared in theaters.

I just love the idea of Jay browsing Tiktok laughing at Grimace shake memes.

The biggest problem Is that Indiana jones used to have such grounded action scenes. They were slow, methodical, and weighty. These were just fast cgi sequences.

The chase scenes are more entertaining when you imagine the people chasing him are nurses and Indiana is just having an episode

Rich Evans needs the Dialysis of Destiny after a grimace milkshake

Spielberg grew up watching serials and movies from the 30’s and 40’s. He was trying to copy and innovate on that style and those creatives. Kinda feels like these franchises, whether it’s this or Star Wars or anything that’s been around, are being given to fans of the franchise and not fans of what inspired the franchise. This cinematography lacked the charm of a Spielberg film- sometimes they’d have it but the blocking and editing was so by the numbers for me, Raiders and Temple are like…pause it every shot or reframe and you’ve got a really cool looking pulpy book cover. Plus the camera moved with a flow and purpose, this was like constantly cutting and a lot of boring basic medium shots. Just felt unimaginative visually and somehow exhausting at the same time

The first three movies were based on myths and mythical artefacts whereas the last two were based on known debunked pseudoarchaeology. The adventures fall a bit flat when you feel that you're watching an _Ancient Aliens_ rip-off.

"I remember Kathy coming in the room with her pen and pad, and she was *horrible* at taking notes. But she was good at interrupting people" - Stephen Spielberg

Being in the same theatre as Rich watching The Meg 2 trailer must have been a life altering experience

I took Indy chanting “Hell No We Won’t Go” as him trying to get the attention of the other protestors to help him as he’s being carried away by The Man, and they would jump in and help “one of their own”. I agree that it was poorly done but this was my interpretation.

Rich Evans is clearly letting his mortal guise slip here. You can hear his voice become ethereal and omnipresent every once in a while.

To the guys issues with the John Williams soundtrack: one of the things that made Williams so successful back in the day is that he actually had access to the script and accompanying footage when composing his scores. So, he could actually see what was supposed to be happening in the scene and he would compose the score from there. What's been happening in the last decade though is that Williams hasn't had access to said scripts or footage - either because Lucasfilm was keeping it under lock and key because of "lol, spoilers!" or as has been far more frequent in their projects, the scenes were needing to be completely re-written and reshot all the way down to the last minute. So it's a situation where either Williams has no idea what's supposed to be going on in a given scene or what the mood of the scene is supposed to be, or the original scene which he used for the basis of his score got completely rewritten or junked entirely.

This is the worst thing to happen to Indiana Jones since the last thing to happen to Indiana Jones.

Great to see how Mike can easily improve a 300 million dollar movie with a few quick ideas.

The 'who made that movie?' running gag gets me every time.

I can't wait for their Barbie/Oppenheimer double-feature. "Barbie was depressing & boring and Oppenheimer was fun & subversive!"

"These zoomers stole our bit" was the most unexpected thing to come out of the grimace shake memes

'Jason State Man' is my favorite Richevansism in a while, we are lucky to have him

should've had Alden Ehrenreich as indy for the opening train sequence

This is as close to watching the movie as I'll ever get.

The use of forced perspective here is honestly masterful - Jay looks like a regular sized human 👏

The mysterious Greek clock thing that Mike is talking about is called the Antikythera Mechanism, and funny enough, it was the main inspiration for the 1990s video game Indiana Jones and the Infernal Machine! A game that had a better story than Crystal Skull and Dial of Destiny combined...

I love how Rich sounds like he’s in a tunnel when he gets loud

Very subversive for 80yr old Mike to reprise his role as a dementia-ridden movie watcher

So heartwarming to see Mike talk about a movie that is all about his true passion: Elder Abuse

This movie felt like going to a funeral.

The idea of an opening sequence with Indy making breakfast etc. is kind of what happens in Fate Of Atlantis, which has Indy recovering an artifact at the college, with "traps" like the bookcase falling down.

"The elderly watch any movie" Mike is 100% right here a friend and I went to go see an anime romcom in the cinema in the middle of ireland and there was a group of 8 elderly people there.

Deepfake Harrison Ford is like seeing a guy in his 40s wearing his high school letterman jacket

I love when rich is like "how could he have possibly survived that" and then they edited in two other scenes in which people survive much more insane shit

"Just have her be a scumbag" Jay missed an opportunity for a pretty solid Phoebe Waller-Bridge pun here

I speak for most RLM fans, I was looking forward to this more than I was the movie.

Never expected the plot twist of Harrison Ford not breaking his hip.

Some more observations: 1) Originally I thought a younger Indy being depicted was pretty cool and clever given how it was apparent that time-travel was integral to the plot. It's also a pretty effective way of avoiding having to confront the fact that Harrison Ford is technically an octogenarian at this point in his life. Ironically though, we only see him younger in a flash-back not via time-travel. Wasted opportunity? I guess it goes with the theme still somewhat? 2) There was a mention when Indy was opening up emotionally about his regrets and how certain mistakes left him in a state of grief and it seems obvious that the time-travel element could have played a role here in his personal redemption. Seems like a missed opportunity and this little excursion in the plot ended up being of little importance, as for some reason, the conflict between he and his ex (Marion) just suddenly and inexplicably resolved itself at the end. It was shoehorned in more so as a warm and fuzzy sentimental nostalgic moment. Felt cheap. Like pretty lazy writing without any pay-off. If you are going to plant a seed, then reap something from it! 3) His goddaughter was pretty messily written. You can generously chalk it up to her eccentricity or enigmatic nature but it at first wasn't well established why she didn't hold the same reverence and awe in the mystique of these ancient artifacts that her father had. She obviously was greatly influenced by him and was a sort of apprentice - so it is strange that she would not inherit that same passion or admiration. She ended up having this self-serving attitude of vanity - treating these objects as a means for material gain. If the story had established some sort of rift or animosity between the father and daughter, then this would make sense of her motivation. It would perhaps be her way of acting out of spite or rebellion. Also, her actual character arc is pretty baffling. I don't know why she goes from fairly callous regarding the fate of others (or the world itself for that matter) to becoming so attached and invested as to risk life and limb in ridiculous stunts. I don't understand what is driving her as a sympathetic heroine rather than as the loathsome opportunist she was established as. It just sort of happened without warning and was unrewarding.

Fun Fact: When Helena punched Indiana unconscious, she actually killed him. He was already weak from being shot and she just finished him off. The rest of the movie is the last of his brain firing up an hallucination. That's why he's suddenly home seeing his close friend, and also that rather unpleasant woman that he's been traveling with. He's suddenly back together with Marion, his one true love. As his brain blinks out and he succumbs to death, he reaches for his hat, a representation of his long and unfulfilled life. Once she knocks him out, the rest is just a brain death dream.

If I had a nickle for every time a character played by Shia LaBeouf was killed offscreen for a sequel, I would have two nickles.

Crystal Skull being 15 years old is wild to me. Fuck I'm getting old.

The "cancelled streaming show" multiverse could actually be a really fun premise.

RLM single-handedly provided a third of this movie's box office.

Its unfortunate that these movies have missed the opportunity of character development with Indy finally using a snake as a whip.

I genuinely love the idea of an "action chase scene" where 80 year old Indy is just trying to get to his lecture at the university on time.

These guys missed the moment when Archimedes looked at the completed dial and said "Eureka!" That is the causality loop. I don't blame them though. It is so undersold it might as well have been an Easter Egg.

For an Indiana Jones movie starring an 80 year old Harrison Ford, it was almost as good as it could've been.

Hot Damn kids! Was it Magical Mystery Tour? I think my brain was still recovering from the train scene.

I love how Indy is wanted for murder, and by the end, he still is...

Mikes idea to make the opening action scene about old Indiana getting up in the morning was true genius.

In the future I hope to see an in depth documentary into how bad the fumbles behind the scenes at Disney have REALLY been. Had Star Wars and Indiana Jones and all there own iconic properties and managed to make every single thing just terrible. It's actually really damn impressive.

Magical Mystery Tour, Mike. Edit: great review though

Yes, a female Indiana Jones, a woman archeologist who seeks out ancient items, fighting off the bad guys while doing it. What would you call her?..... Laura Croft. You'd call her Laura Croft.

Next Bond movie is going to be 2 hours of how his family puts him on hospice and just watch him wither and die. Stunning

Mike stopping his point mid-sentence to quietly announce he needs to drink his beer will live rent free in my head forever.

I know Rich is known for wacky noises but the noise that comes out of his mouth at 36:28 is unlike any noise I’ve heard another human make in my life

Mike stopping in the middle of his sentence and saying "Hold on, I need to drink beer" tells me everything I need to know about this movie.

I imagined that Archimedes was going to be some guy from modern times who invented time travel and became Archimedes once they discovered that his body had a watch

Well Chat GPT or John William's ghost writer won the Grammy for "Helena's Theme". Just re-watched Dial of Destiny 2 days ago and you couldn't pay me a billion dollars to even try to hum that tune.

Why do I find the musings of three middle-aged Wisconsinites more entertaining than the actual films they’re discussing

The best part of Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny was that it was a double feature: the first 20 minutes was the Polar Express and then you got a Geriatric Indiana Jones film! What more could anyone ask for!

I got the impression that Mike, Jay and Rich had more fun talking about the grimace shake than the movie

The CGI to make Rich look like he’s 75 is impressive. Good work fellas.

Love the concept of the opening sequence being Indy as a grumpy old guy getting up in the morning and facing minor inconveniences on his way to work. That would have been so brilliantly funny.

'Who'd have thunk that I'd live to 2023, to see a fucking fifth Indiana Jones movie, with an 87 year old Harrison Ford?'

I can't get over how "part time" still lives rent free in their heads, 15 years later.

A sad end to an iconic character. I'm talking about Rich Evans.

I think (among the wealth of absurdity) the dumbest thing the Nazis did in ancient Greece was forget that planes don't have to fly 50 feet above the ground.

Honestly the old man adventure waking up with indy music is a really great juxtaposition storytellingwise

An Indiana Jones movie without Indiana Jones is simply a National Treasure prequel.

Jay calling Hitler signing Indy's diary "cute" is everything

43:35 - a great example of that joke working is in 'Willow' when Val Kilmer is flexing with his sword and that two-headed dragon appears behind him, making the guards retreat. In fact, they follow that up ANOTHER good gag when Val runs away from the dragon and ends up standing with all the bad guys

I love that Jay had an occasion to share his knowledge of the Grimace shake trend. You know Rich would have never heard of it otherwise (And honestly, good for him).

In the original Indiana Jones films he did not look at random women like they were pieces of meat. He didn't even look at Willie with interest when he first met her. Marianne was an old flame (or young flame depending how you look at it), and Elsa was an irresistible femme fatale. Indy never eyed other women, and his disinterest in his adoring female students showed he wasn't some lecherous guy.

20:30 My gf is also a film editor and points out that it's the same lightning burst, those same take between the two "part time" takes. Her theory is that the bad take is his ADR over the scene, crapped out in a studio sound booth, and that they probably didn't have a clean multichannel audio recording for the more natural take.

My issue with the Helena character was the lack of connection between her and Indy. She turns around to be deeply caring of Indy. But there wasn't anything they did to pay off that emotional note.

Wernher von Braun, who Mads Mikkelsen is based on, actually lived in Alabama for 20 years.

I had a bad feeling about this movie when I saw an ad for a free ticket at Applebee's

This isn’t the first time, recently, that the guys have started off somewhat positively and then talked themselves out of it.

CGI is so incredible now. Why do they keep managing to use it in such lame ways. Video game physics, uncanny vally. Jurassic park still looks better than many of these scense.

@37:37 Guys! They suggest that the dial was designed to only go back to only the siege on Syracuse to help Archimedes. So even if Indy wanted too, it’s unlikely he could travel back to save Mutt.

I liked the part where Indiana Jones made a conscious decision that his son should remain dead.

The idea of an action opening focused on Indy going through the mundane tribulations of a normal day, if done right could have actually been really clever and charming.

It always makes me feel better to hear you guys say, out loud, what I am thinking during or after the movies. Nice to know I'm not crazy.

You guys hit the demographic nail on the head. I (a 41 year old man) saw it yesterday with my Gen X college prof. sister who made jokes while my 11 year old son enjoyed watching car chases and fights.

I think the perfect ending to Indiana Jones would be that he finally got his prize artifact put in a museum. The last scene would be him in the museum sitting back with a smile on his face as people enjoyed looking at the artifact.

Jay knowing about the Grimace shake and telling his friends about it is so fucking funny