There is no excuse for domestic violence period!

Those church leaders giving out pro abuse advice need to be jailed.

Pastors who tell her to go back to this abuse should be defrocked. The justice system is also massively flawed

The courts and the church repeatedly fail women and children 😭

It breaks my heart her story. Lord how people can be so evil. .

Oh sweet lady, you have suffered so much. From your parents, particularly your degenerate father, to the pastor, to your husband. You've been through terrible times, physically, emotionally, financially and psychologically. I'm not going to offer platitudes, only this: I sincerely hope that your life gets MUCH MUCH better. Things have to improve for you and your children. They cannot get worse. Instead of helping you and protecting you, that pastor did you a disservice (understatement.) Some "Christians" are absolutely toxic. I wish you health and healing.

This happens way to often! I am so glad this pretty woman survived.. hopefully she is now healing..it can take a lifetime. Survivors really need support. People underestimate the long lasting consequences of abuse ❤

She has beautiful eyes!! I hope she is happy now in her life❤

This woman actually said it out loud, that the relationship wasn't chaotic enough. I've seen people go through these types of relationships over and over and couldn't understand why.

For the love of God, how much can a person can endure!!! So sad for this woman, hope she's ok

The system failed you as it has for so many of us! Hopefully, you're in a better place.

Hello Darling. I find myself a little, in Your Life experience. I was abused since my birth, until quite nowadays. Your Life was horror, compared to mine. I am endlessly sorry, for Your suffering. I am keeping You in my prayers. GOD BLESS YOU.

I am so sorry! Abuse is the worst kind of horror! It messes with your psyche. My heart aches with you. I pray the best for you and your children.

You poor woman. God, please help us, abused wives and mothers 💕

This is so heartbreaking💔 😭💔😭💔😭 the system failed this woman and her children. So sad 😭💔

What kind of pastor would tell you to stay??? He was wrong!

She was attracted to abusive men, because of the trauma bond she formed with her abusive parents. At least she knows that she's addicted to drama, because of her upbringing.

I pray for your children. They didn't stand a chance.

Omg...you have been through more than any 1 person should ever have to endure. The court system is awful...they didn’t protect your babies. Your poor children. Sending you blessings.

I am so sorry and so heartbroken hearing this. Everybody failed you and your children.God bless you sweetheart. God is for you. Not the church, not the pastors, not the law etc.

What an incredibly strong person you are Valerie. You have inspired me to keep going forward and to not give up. You are an incredible human being and God Bless You.

Sorry for your painful journey and glad God saved and brought you through.

One of the most shocking stories! This must have been back in 70s or. 80s, before people “woke up” to what Domestic Violence is! God Bless her; move away , far away from them!

Sending you all the best, take care Valerie.

I’m sorry you have suffered so. I wish you much future peace,

Seeing these interviews makes a person think there is no actual funktioning legal system in the States. How can that be?

Your pastor is NOT a sheep of the lord

Sending this lady love and a big hug❤️

Pastors, if it feels wrong it is wrong, it is wrong for you to lie to women like her who needed support, help and not your version of Christian claptrap which by the way is wrong interpreted by you

Thankyou so much for your brutally honest story about your life. You are a beautiful and articulate woman and you have helped me so much. It really is time for me to change my life around once again thankyou x

Your story is so sad I just wanted to reach and give you a big hug and tell you somebody loves you Jesus loves you you seem like a sweet lady

I guess it is cycle of abuse from childhood to adulthood to elderly my god poor woman will it ever stop

You are loved.

Bless you. I am sending you a lot of love. You deserve the best! Feel, repeatedly feel you deserve the best!

Your pastor was WRONG!! As a Christian, this man's response breaks my heart. Jesus Christ would never have told you to continue to stay and keep yourself and your children in harm's way. You have suffered much. And I care. God bless you, dear one.

No we have no justice system...my baby sister was horribly abused...but wouldn't divorce cause she said THEY (courts) would just give the kids to him....

The part where she talked about chaos, and although she was in a good relationship, she ended it because the chaos was missing ... I can relate to that so much. Sometimes that chaos keeps you going, especially if it’s all you’re used to. When you get in a good relationship and don’t have to deal with that, you start having to deal with your own issues - and that can be really uncomfortable. You feel like it’s the relationship that is uncomfortable, but it’s not. It’s you.

This IS the cycle of abuse, sadly. I am so sad to hear all the shocking things that both you AND your children went through. But the abuse your children went through isn't your fault, and unfortunately it's deeply affected them. It's common that those women or men who have suffered abuse in childhood either fall into a relationship that is abusive or become abusers themselves. Since you were an adult you would hope for proper guidance from someone who was in an authorive position, however I think you were demonstrably failed, because of your religious beliefs it held you somewhat captive in a relationship that was not good for you, however I understand that you and many hold the sanctity of marriage and commitment to it, as important. Many abused wives hold onto the hope that things will change, and sadly they do not, simply because an abuser cannot EVER change. You are an amazingly strong person to get through it all and I wish you all the very best for a happier future. The fact you survived gives hope for those of us in similar situations. Thank you for sharing your experience.

Children who witness the abuse are more likely to continue the cycle.

Greetings Valerie....it will take time to heal, try volunteering at your local courts and you will see your trauma has is the same abuse inflicted on thousands of women and children, it can help you heal, because you are not alone...trust me...your story is special....Big blessings to you....stay strong and focused

You didn't feel you diserved to be loved and happy. That's what abuse does to you. It robs you of your self worth. You believe the bad treatment by others is what you deserve and you'll accept it and seek it out until you find healing. I know, that was me. My healing came in my 60's after 30 years of work and facing my past. It just takes that long.

Any Pastor that would tell her to stay in that situation should be exposed....

This is absolutely harrowing. 😞😞😞

Thank You for sharing your story! It is sometimes hard to discuss abuse because people look at you differently! I think if more and more people shared their stories, it would help others. 😊

I hope your children get help. I know the abuse they endured has caused them to be that way.

She said something that stuck to me: Chaos; sometimes you are used to chaos

I'm confused why CPS never placed the children in your care during the several times they were taken from your ex

So very sorry Dear one! That Pastor must be a cult like leader, as he didn’t follow what the Bible says. Whatever it takes make a plan, and leave, far away to a shelter to others in this situation. Abuse never gets better, it’s not what people do to us, the question is why we allow it. When you know better, hopefully with God’s help you will do better.❤️🙏

what is EVIL going on in the church..

Thank you for sharing your story. Hugs. I'm so sorry for what you have been through and hope you will find the happiness and peace that you deserve.

Valerie you look like such a nice woman with a warm heart! Please please take care and get all the help you can so this never happen again. Much love from Sweden

You are so brave! Thank you!

I am so grateful my son's have turned out to be such wonderful young men so so lucky. This women has been through so much and I hope her children get the help they deserve as well.

Sadness for everyone in this story😢 So sorry for you and your children but at least you have found some peace at last.

I am 58 ! I Hear YOU!!!! I know ur Chaos factor I left first husband because too nice and calm for a Demon 30 plus years I stayed

Bless you my darling xx hey you're here telling us your survivor so let's enjoy what we have than crying for something we don't have even if we had them hun x Hugs your way x

I am so sorry to hear the hurt and pain you have experienced...I too know abandonment, rejection and abuse- physically and mentally...it is a pain that goes so deep. When I met Jesus, my Savior of the Bible, I found a love that is unconditional...know I would not have made it without Him!!!!

So it wasn't enough that her precious children saw how badly the so called father was treating you their mother.the fact that he caught a disease was your breaking point! I honestly or genuinely don't know what to say aside from I hope and pray that your children are safe and well! May God bless and keep them safe! Peace and love to you beautiful angels 💐💛

Totally understand I turned down an amazing man Bec of years of ABUSE it's so sad, u were SCARED not knowing

Your story is very scary and sad 😢

I’m so sorry you went through that absolute nightmarish hell , thank you for sharing I hope you are healing

This poor woman!! It makes my heart break for her!! I cannot believe the system failed her like this and those children!! Sick!! I understand what she says about chaos. I deal with that too. I have no excuse in life!!

I’m so proud of you for sharing your story! Heal yourself is your only task! 💜🙏🏻💜

I am sorry that you went thru all that painful days. Glad you are doing well now, and thank you for sharing your story.

Wow this is so pathetic how our system is so broken. I’m so sorry for you and I hope your Life will get better.

You're a soldier for what u went & possibly currently abused & neglected& health scare. To add pain the kids. Bless u and yours.😇🤗

Praying for you as you continue to heal!! Praying that you are safe and that you are being loved and cherished!!!

I am so sorry for the pain and suffering you went through ,Valerie . Honey just remember that God loves those who suffer the most ,and remember them at you're finally free.and you should be rejoicing for it, a d I hope you are.I cried when I saw your video because you didn't deserve to suffer that way, No woman does,believe me I tell you true.INever take him back this heartless monster for what he did go you. Concentrate on making your life bettrr one day at a time and remember that yours stronger than you think you are a boney.Youve got to be strong for yourself ,you've got to be out for yourself,honey because no one can do this for you but you.If I had a daughter who ignored me in my time of need the way yours did which was d.so cruel I would disown her and never speak to her ever again.You sound like a lovely person .I will always pray for you.My own mother watched me suffer and wouldn't help me.We women weren't put here to.be abused and mistreated by men this way as were men's better half. Men listen up:without us you can't feel the tender love we women give you if your reading this you can't have sex without us and ypu can't have children without us .These men know what they would have ymto do in a situation like that,.Shame on any man for abusing for abusing a woman in any manner ,form ,shape whatsoever.A man to raise his voice and hands to a woman is not a real man because he wouldn't raise his hands to anothetvman this way so quickly and he's a monster and bully.I can sympathize with you for what you've been through because I'm also suffering,my own mother left mentor suffer like this and much worse than this and she knew I was suffering and wouldn't help me. O 7She wasn't right in her mind for what she did to me if you could understand what I'm saying and I'm sure you could. She died hating me,a bitter old woman. I'm in a very bad place in my life right now would. you please pray for me also?I All I know is that freedom isms everything ,it really is because of what I'm going through and I've been trying to help myself.Nitbing in life is easy but I promise myself I'm going to make it.Ive been looking for work to help myself or how else can I without the financial means,rigbt?Anyway I will continue to struggle and strive until I find a n job and suceed,and I will not ever give up I'm very strong perzon.Quitters never win and winners never quit.Im so happy you're finally free from.your suffering ,as my own life is a living nightmare believe me I could write a book about it and working steadily towards my own success ..God bless you

God bless you I am so glad you are safe, been there too, I remember thinking I will wait till my son leaves school luckily I left when my son was 4! Love and healing hugs on the way xxxxxx

i have to wonder what the kids version of events would be, and/or why the police were not informed about the neglect and sexual abuse. i feel for this woman, but her story seems to be missing some vital pieces...

Heartbreaking story. Thanks for bravely telling it. Hopefully your children will WAKE UP and return to you with compassion and loving-kindness.🕊 Soon!

🍀🍀🍀God. Bless you. ⭐😘⭐💝

Thank you for sharing your story. It helps me, who is still kind of in the middle/end of it. I pray you're doing better. Amen, it won't ever get better. I am a week and half away from my abuser. It feels so good to be free. To not be yelled at, told im lazy, I never do this or do that. If only I made plans to hang out he would completely change. If only I did this or that. His misery is 100% because of me. I need to make him happy by doing what he wants. And only if I LISTENED to him, our relationship would be perfect... 🙄 Im over it. 4 years of that is too much

Bless you sweetie, you have come along way, my story is like yours, God has healed so much of my trauma. I'm at peace, may God heal our children 🙏🙏🙏

Through all of it & now, esp traumatized & w/ little to no support system, wondering how she supports herself. Even tho I've finally mustered up the courage/strength to break free, my ex has gone to court (selling my car, leaving us w/ nothing.. to ensure I couldn't even pay to appear, let alone get there) got quick divorce somehow put through/granted FAST? No child support, no alimony, no pension split, nothing. All the yrs I was the one working, he was the one irresponsible... the moment I got sick (no longer of use to him) the devaluing & discard phase began. He manipulated family, friends... has threatened me & our teenage son, to the point I had to pull him out of HS... Just trying to find somewhere we can stay/sleep has been exhausting. Sacrificing, trying to survive, seems no matter where we turn, there's no light, only toxic darkness. The moment we need someone to lean on, it's an empty, self-serving, lonely world. Normal, able to care for self, even if tiny... steps forward, seems too much to ask. My son deserves to not be stuck in a room w/ me all day... nothing to do, no where to go, on a broken laptop.... "until" we can SLOWLY save up enough to even get a place, a car, clothes, finish HS... we both deserve to finally, live. So much time & effort has been wasted already. Huge ((hugs)) to this woman & to anyone who has been through trauma & abuse. Idk why, but not many in real life seem to understand, 'get it', or even have compassion enough to listen. So, what do we do? Stop talking about it. Really fkd up that, even w/ a big family, etc.. who has nothing to do w/ us... (that, even if they did, couldn't trust them since they DO have contact w/ him.. & might tell him where we're at) .... besides online, couldn't tell you the last time I spoke to an actual person. The 'friend' we stay with, is gone most of the time... when home, argues w/ her kids, is off trying to find/deal w/ them OR... ignores us. Once every couple weeks, she'll ask if we want to go to the store w/ her. "just ask if you need anything", seems so easy, but.... fear of being let down, feeling horrible about self anyway, feeling undeserving I guess, idk. The most minute steps forward, are still steps forward, not back.... is what I keep telling myself. Because he's blocked on everything, I get random messages from strangers on fb, saying things like..... it could all end now, just come back. Sigh, already having spent nearly 26 yrs in hell? ..... No matter what... NEVER. No response, deleted, blocked... no-contact is the only thing keeping us safe imho. Anyone going through anything similar.... one step at a time, day by day!

Sorry for your painful journey and such suffering. You have endured too much and Glad God saved you.

Very sad story with sad ending. May God bless her and save her from her abusive family amen

God bless and heal you, You are very strong, and deserve a much better life. Glad you are settling firm limits now.

Thank you,, many blessings.

I can relate to that: the men who are best for you.....are more peaceful.....and not violent! But you are attracted to men …..who are bad for you! I've never married.....and I think any choice I had made in my early years.....would have been a bad marriage! No kids! What women go thru to have children!

Poor lady. I believe in God. I go to church and pray daily. But the stupid nonsense that her pastor kept telling her, is NOT what a loving God that die on the cross for our sins, wanted for her or any of his kids. Although I go to church, people need to be cautious of just how much they listen to a pastor, priest or anyone in the church.

You have gorgeous bue eyes and express yourself very well. It's truly a shocking story. It's so heartbreaking that I can't take any more in.

He’s “mother” is a monster.

I worry about all of the abused locked in quarantine with their monsters right now. They must be living hell on Earth.

Please continue your journey forward and embrace That Higher Love. It ain’t boring when you really get it. You’ve endured and survived serious heartbreak and misery. I will pray that 1. You’ll truly grow “over” it 2. Find real peace. 3. Walk on in victory.♥️

That’s so sad😢. You’re very brave and 💪

Your story truth broke my heart. I pray that one day God will bring you and the kids together one day

Makes me wonder how may women are in the cemetery now because they listened to the pastor, priest, church etc...😔

Wait!!! Why didn't the children tell police he was molesting them? That's all it would have taken!

waaah so sorry for everthing happend I also passed through hell but I could not manage I just moved on with God everthing is possible am 13yrs as single Mum with my two kids God is great sometyms lady's we should take a step coz someone can die easly

“ 🤬The church”

thanks for sharing, I am feeling of heading that way, trusting the people in the outside my our house, than my wife and her siblings, and her relatives. I have to lock my room all the time, cook my own food. They still try to fume some kind of chemicals in my room that caused me head aches, poison my food, got me sick even.

These kids have a choice to love their mother

Wow. I relate to the chaos thing 100%

My ❤ goes out to her, her story is inspiring I wish my gram was here

Christ will make all things new again.

You are worth it! Take care of yourself. You deserve better. Dont except this treatment. You might think about therapy. Good luck.

You STOP thinking of yourself first....taking your life? You rise up and protect your children because you’re better than that. Be better. You stop their monster of a dad trying to get them back. BE THEIR MOM. You brought them into this world so you fight for them until you take your last breath. You’re stronger than you know.

So so sad, you poor lady, my heart breaks for you. Some people just don't get it, they think you can leave at anytime? But you can't. It's not your fault your children have gone wayward, it is their fathers because they have seen & lived his wicked way, so in turn they grew up knowing no better. But one day they will, & hopefully it is before they too ruin their life as your exhusband has. This world has some cruel & sadistic people but there are some very beautiful people also. But in hearing this ladies story, mine & others like it, there would have to be some nice people because if not, then we all would give up i think. I cried for this lady & everyother person who has received abuse from anyone!

I feel you xx just know you are loved