Meredith needs to go, she keeps spreading awful lies and harmful opinions. Alyx should have the other producer lady as her cohost if she really wants one. She's funny and doesn't say shit that could actually hurt people if listened to

I strongly disagree with a lot of Meredith's takes today. From saying men are hard-wired to always want sex / thus cheating is "natural" for them, to saying women cheat because they don't know how to say no, to implying men can't be taken advantage of because they'd be "turned on" if there was sex, a lot of the things she said this episode were icky. I'm glad Alyx and Amanda pushed back on some of that. EDIT: She's also had some rlly weird takes on S/A that made me feel gross. In particular, I remember one with a teenager who sexually assaulted a child and there was just a lot of excuses and sympathy for the perp that made me feel awful.

as a male you can very much tell a pretty girl to get off you if u wanted to if ur in a relationship and not cheat you know what ur doing being a male is not a explanation she is wrong and as a therapist you’d think she’d know better

the part where Meredith was talking about how mens brains are basically wired to look at other girls and “cheat” made me so mad. men don’t deserve excuses for that shit, they have control of their mind and body and can very well make their own decisions.

How is it on the women's insecurities If their boyfriend follows a bunch of half naked women?I don't know a single woman who would be okay with that even if they are Instagram models.

I honestly love this podcast and it often genuinely opens up great conversations that both Alyx and Meredith positively contribute towards. However this episode truly worries me, as a psychology graduate a lot of the things that Meredith discussed were simply either incorrect, severely scientifically understudied (in the way she stating them) or medically/scientifically dismissed/disproven. It is actually quite disappointing that this episode was aired. Specifically I’m referring to where she talks about men’s ‘genetic and chromosomal’ differences when it it comes to sex. Are there differences in the way mean and women view, carry out, understand and process sexual interaction and intimacy, yes of course, but the issue is the claim that a man is ‘programmed’ in Meredith’s words- by sex and driven by sex. Te way that she states this and then says ‘no it’s not science’ but then continues with the same narrative that cheating is a man’s ‘natural response’. This is false. Entirely false, just within the early years of my degree we studied and read and were meticulously educated on sex and sexuality and I find it quite incomprehensible that a woman whom is educated and has a robust career in a field whereby she aids those who may have dealt with being cheated on or even committed to cheating themselves would give out her words to your millions of subscribers in such a nonchalant and careless manner. I think both Alyx and Meredith should be reminded that although this podcast is clearly not a professional help aid nor should be used as one there are impressionable, young, old, vulnerable, uneducated or even educated people, so many people from so many backgrounds that look and see a ‘professional’ such as Meredith and take her word. I understand that that is not solely their responsibility but I also think that it should be something that is considered in the production of this podcast.

Is it just me or does it feel really ethnically wrong when meredith talks about her clients? I know she doesn’t say names, but still. If I heard my therapist talking about things I confided in her on the internet, sometimes even making fun of, I would be so embarrassed and not go back. The whole point of therapy is that it’s confidential so it just feels wrong that she throws it out there & laughs about it

I don’t even know if I can get through this video because it’s making me so uncomfy with all the lying and the cheating and the making excuses for men while blaming it on the women’s insecurities 😬 I’m currently in my own relationship and we’ve been working on building trust because one of those situations basically happened to me, so I just wish there has been some ✨variety✨ or at least someone to talk about how this affects the partner whose boundaries were crossed :(

Wow, I was not a fan of how Meredith handled that cheating submission :”)

Im glad people are finally talking about the therapist. I've never really found her points or opinions particularly interesting, engaging, or insightful, it typically just makes me skip through the video to move past her parts. But this video definitely had some nasty, off putting takes for me.

Glad i’m not the only one who was completely put off by merediths takes today

I really don’t like Meredith the more we hear her speak. It scares me a little bit that she’s a licensed professional with actual clientele.

I’ll be completely honest, I don’t love miss girls takes on todays episode (I am so sorry I forget her name the therapist)

Idk ima have to disagree with a few boundaries touched on by meredith and trying to pin it on insecurities rather than just disrespect

shoutout to the demisexual guy!! hearing that made me feel very heard as someone on the asexual spectrum. wherever he is, i hope he’s having a lovely time

I know we are all trying our best but as a psychology student who is slowly realising how shit, limited and flawed therapists' training and resources are, this just reconfirmed a lot of things for me and it was painful to listen to lmao

Man this whole episode makes me really queasy about ever getting in a relationship again.

hey, yucky neurosexism in this episode. i’m not mad, just a bit disappointed- the idea that there is a difference in the brain between sexes is a myth and a dangerous one. people being unfaithful in relationships under the circumstances of impulsive sex is societal issue, not a biological one. and the misconception both reinforces misogynistic ideas and upholds very transphobic, terf-y rhetoric. please just be careful about perpetrating such harmful rumors! i love meredith and i’m glad to hear her in another episode, but that really bothered me!!

honestly i think alyx is better solo.. a lot of times these secrets are ethically wrong where i think the person getting hurt should receive empathy, but meridith always makes it a devils advocate thing.. instead alyx seems to be more understanding of the actual situation. this and the last episode w the sa victim were my limit, sorry.

Dont get me wrong, I really do like her BUT... Her as a therapist... Im concerned with a lot of what she said.

The takes from Meredith in this episode...yikes... There is NOTHING! Wrong with setting boundaries. Men are not hardwired to cheat or find seggsual gratification everywhere. An 3rection does not mean a man is seggsually aroused. Boundaries are not based in faults or insecurities (most of the time). Men can get arousal literally when being assaulted. The two are not synonymous. Never really agreed with Meredith but always put it down to just difference of opinions, however this and seeing lots of people feeling upset also in the comments has really made me mad lol.

So sorry but this therapist has some pretty bad L takes hahaha.

Meredith Is whack

Meridith needs to go, she’s just weird with her answers. Terrible psychologist

I whole heartedly disagree withr the therapist today. Usually i enjoy or devil’s advocate takes, but I dont see have the boundary that you dont enjoy your partner casually viewing explicit content constantly, as an insecurity thing. I think thats a really really gross narrative we have been pushing to women especially for years now. The casual consumption of half naked women gives men these crazy unrealistic expectations and it never ends, its an addiction, not even to porn but to viewing women in general. Imo anyway, I’m no therapist but also therapist are definitely human and not always right as well.

i don’t like Meredith. i think that she is way way way too influenced by the work she’s done with sex addicts.

As someone who is studying to be a psychologist, I really hope I do not start thinking like Meredith

meredith was not it this episode, goddamn

I believe that men/women who are in relationships should not be intentionally interacting with provocative photos/videos on social media. To me, it is the equivalent to your significant other walking up to someone in front of you and saying “DAMN! You’re so hot!”…. It’s disrespectful to your relationship and it is allowing room for desiring someone other that your s/o…

The advice on people pleasing was honestly so helpful for me. I needed to hear that I’ve spent my whole life making sure everyone else was ok and let myself suffer And now my mental health is shit

there’s not many people that i can watch talk for an hour, but alyx is definitely one of the few

With the story of that guy cheating at the club I also think he could be lying in the post, saying he doesn’t want it to possibly make himself feel less guilty about the situation. I’ve had experience of people doing this where they shift the blame to the other person involved

Everyone has their own boundaries. It doesn’t matter if you guys constitute porn as cheating or not. Everyone has their own boundaries so if she clarified before they even dated she wasn’t comfortable with it he should have a. Not crossed her boundaries or b. Told her that boundary wasn’t okay with him and ended the relationship. Regardless of your feelings everyone is entitled to their own boundaries and they should be respected if both parties agree from the beginning

i'm glad it's not an unpopular opinion that meredith kinda sucks :/ when she's on, it makes the podcasts boring and sucky

I am so glad other people in the comments are bothered by Meredith too. The entire time I was cringing at her EDIT: but I love you Alyx 🥰🥰🥰🥰

Alyx, thank you for talking about how you are not sure monogamy works for you. I've been struggling with coming to terms with the fact that I don't think I want monogamous relationships anymore. Thank you for speaking about it, and helping me feel more normal for feeling that way. I wish non-monogamy was more talked about and normalized, because sometimes it's hard to say that that is what I want, since monogamy is considered "normal" and what you should strive for. I've had to do a lot of work with my therapist to realize that I define my relationships and I get to decide what kind of relationship I want. It's hard when you aren't following the cookie-cutter path that has been laid out for you.

This therapist is low-key problematic

I have some input for the discussion around 25:22. Looking at pictures of hot women IS objectifying. Ill do my best to explain, im just a college student who happens to be taking a feminist philosophy course. Ill be using an example from google lol (ill reply all links) Our brains see people and objects in different ways. We can recognize a whole face, but if we were shown just one part of the face we would have a hard time. On the other hand, recognizing part of a chair is just as easy as recognizing a whole chair. So they did this study where they made people look at sexualized pictures of both women and men. Images appear one by one on a screen, some pics were right side up or upside down, and after each pic they were be shown a black screen and then two images. They then had to choose the one that matched w/ the one they had just seen. you can guess the results: ppl recognized the right side up men better than the upside down men (meaning they had a hard time recognizing upside down men) but women in underwear were not any harder to recognize when they were upside down. SO THIS IS JUST AN EXAMPLE FROM THE association for physiological science, but not at all my point. So ill be talking about Sandre Lee Barktly's idea of fragmentation in sexual objectification. This is more like a micro concept in her text I'll try to link it cuz its a really good (short) read on psychological oppression if ur into that. So fragmention "is splitting of the whole person into parts of a person" - you don't have to understand that rn. So she says, to be sexually objectified (in one way) is to be an object of a kind of perception. An unwelcomed perception that takes the part for the whole. an example: A women goes into an interview and the whole time the guy is staring at her chest. She gets uncomfortable and performs badly ( no job ):). The mans objectifying perception only serves him, it is unwanted by the woman because what he is doing is taking one part of her: her body and sees it as the whole of her. This is a long way of saying when men look at women they only see their body. I need to note that i know in this example the objectification is unwanted, however, it is the concept of "fragmentation" the splitting of part of a person as the whole that I want to pull out from Barktly to use FOR MY INPUT FINALLLLLY: So fragmentation is something that happens during the act of sexual objectification. When men follow a bunch of sexualized women on the internet he is literally seeing just her for her body. Taking a part and seeing it as a whole. now is it unwelcomed? maybe, maybe not but i doubt those kind of guys only sexualize those specific accounts and not personal normal accounts that arent trying to be sexualized. Regardless, a fragmented perception is occurring and together with the study^^^^^^ i think i have enough to say that it is objectifying women. However, objectifying can be consentual. In the cases of OF or sex work. In those cases women want to be seen as just that part of themselves; their body. KK byeeee ill probably have like 2034702 things to add and i swear i tried to keep it as paraphrased and short as possible so if it doesn't make sense my badddd. Anyone can argue this isn't like facts no printer stop its 2022 ok bye.

I'm not a fan of the therapist on the show

alyx , i love you . you are way better on your own. i can’t get through these videos with meredith ugh.

For the going down on me update: USE DENTAL DAMS. They're not just for lesbians lol.

As an opinionated person with BPD who’s been to therapy and practices DBT on my own now, I would LOVE to guest on this show to give my opinion/insight, especially on BPD related secrets like that one girl obsessed with her friend. Cuz the first thing I thought when Meredith said “it doesn’t sound like there was an rejection going on” I immediately thought, “no there definitely is, and it’s so apparent to people with BPD because if their favorite person is venting to them about their ‘girl issues’ that is an inherent implied rejection because they are showing interest in someone else and not the person who holds them as a FP” and I’m absolutely DYING to give my input if someone else in the show doesn’t say what I’m thinking lmao

Meredith being a psychologist who mixes it with ZEN BUDDHISM talking about scientific evidence is insane

As a man, this natural instinct to cheat talk @27:25 is BS. What she says about men staring at women when they cross the street - respectful men are taught not to stare at women to make them uncomfortable... Also, yes if you're in a relationship and Beyonce sits on your face you push her off, if you don't, you clearly want to cheat and should NOT be in a committed relationship. Idk what types of guys this girl has asked this question to, probably guys from a college frat house. If a girl comes onto you, that's sexual assault and it's ok to use force to keep her away from you. Sigh

Having these come out on Thursday is the best thing because Thursday is the day I have online school so I just listen to this for an hour while I’m doing my assignments and my teacher can’t hear it

It's a little weird to assume people approach sex differently based on their chromosomes/biology. Some cis women have xy, they've got everything a cis woman has except two x chromosomes. I'm positive people are the way they are sexually based on how they were raised, like with all things. A man can be violent because of how he was raised, but a woman could be too. BUT because of our society and gender roles women are raised to be quiet and men are raised .. not at all. Being a trans man, me and my brother were raised SO differently. I was raised to be polite and quiet, he was hardly paid attention to unless it affected the adults. I was having a conversation with my mom a few years back (while being out) that I was worried about my brother and how he's taking part in romantic relationships. He was 20 dating a 15 year old girl before this conversation took place, she said to me "boys will be boys" which is always the excuse cis men get. Basically, cis men are raised with the "boys will be boys" mentality and they get a social pass to be a 'boy'. And societies version of a 'boy' is a violent, dominant, sexual being who will take what he wants when he wants it because he's the man. That's where it comes from. I have never met a young cis boy who wants to do things some grown cis men want to do ( my dad isn't like this though because he had to unlearn what he was taught). It's not genetic and if someone says it is that's gotta be their "boys will be boys" mentality 😭

was NOT prepared to get called out so bad on the obsession thing… related hardcore to everything and now realizing just how bad it is and how i don’t want my life to revolve around one person (mind you i don’t even get to see them hardly ever anymore)

Meredith has some really bad and honestly harmful takes. She also made a lot of heteronormative assumptions around what genitals people have, what pronouns they use, and what their sexuality is. It's pretty gross tbh because she's a therapist. Alyx and the producer person are much better without Meredith.

i’m sorry but as a male csa victim i was extremely uncomfortable with meredith’s takes today. i love you alyx but this episode was awful

I disagree with a lot of Merideth's takes.. I know they're only opinions, but man, she really does err on the side of guys ideas

do more episodes like this. With more writing submissions and no video chat thing

Hi Alyx, idk if you’ll see this but I just wanted to say: I have been watching you for years and love your content. I love the new format of revealing your secrets but if I’m honest I’m not too much of a fan of the content. You used to be like please don’t send your trauma to revealing your secrets and I loved that, but every episode seems to be a big trauma dumping sesh atm, like this week with the self harm content and especially last week with the assault phone call. I had to skip both parts of both videos because they just weren’t nice things to listen to. Idk if I’m the only one who feels like this but you know. I’m still going to keep watching and supporting you but I hope if you see this you take the feedback x

meredith is such an L

love your content!! aside from some weird takes, it was hard to listen to because it seemed like each secret was depressing. i understand that you'd like to showcase deeper topics since it's an episode w a therapist, but it would be much better to have a mix of lightheartedness, too. this is the only episode where i've felt this way though, love the pod!!

Alyx, I watched your podcast before seeing my therapist today and want to thank you for the valuable shared tools about people-pleasing, as I can totally relate and was able to process some things in my own life and hope to be one day reformed! What I learned: 1) My comfort is important. I don't need to spend all of my time making sure everyone else is okay to the detriment of not taking care of my own emotions. 2) STOP (Stop, Take a step back, Observe, Proceed mindfully) so I can make decisions in a non-subconscious way since it's so internally automatic. 3) Set boundaries (easier said than done, but not completely unachievable!) 😺❤️

I absolutely adore the sex positivity that ur podcast brings. You’re not afraid to talk about sexology and it makes me so happy to even have a psychologist perspective

Meredith has been striking me as subtly transphobic, like really bioesentialist and saying thing such as "women's bodies are better because they're soft and pretty and dicks are scary and ugly" really doesn't help. It makes me so uncomfortable and upset when she says stuff about men's and women's brains being wired differently from birth because that's just not true scientifically and her being the psychologist on this show gives her some power to misinform people greatly!

28:25 glad you said smth it’s not programmed for men to cheat. everyone has desires including women. it’s a conscious decision to act on it

Does anyone really miss the format of the other videos? I appreciate the introspective view of this podcast but the more I watch the episodes the more I realize how we get way less secrets, and honestly that why I watched this. Ofc I'm interested in some of the secrets but these videos went from 10-15 minutes of straight shocking secrets and now we get maybe 10 or less per episode, the ads are ridiculously long, and I feel as though they spend too much time chatting about one single secret and I just miss binging a ton at a time

I disagree with them saying that things just happen and you just cheat once you’re together for a while and your partner is not there right next to you in the situation. You shouldn’t need your partner being with you everywhere for things to not “just happen and you cheat on them” and being together for years should be something that grows your relationship, if it’s a reason to cheat for someone they probably shouldn’t be in that relationship. Also excusing guys cheating for “being men” is very weird, they’re not animals they can control themselves and know what they’re doing. None the less this is no hate to any of you! I love your videos!

Amanda looks so pretty!

If the person befriending their r@pist IS in high school, they need to tell a trusted adult. Period. They cannot handle these feelings on their own. If they're out of high school, they should seek help via counseling and/or college assistance (although I'm cis female and only am familiar with a woman's center for help) and maybe an LGBTQ+ student center. This is really complicated and you can't handle it alone! And, you don't have to. I hope they get some support.

Downloading this with the last sliver of wifi I have left, I'm in Florida a big ol hurricane almost ate us all. F-ing insane I'm glad to be alive. I literally watched people's roofs rip off with eyes dude, a f-n river flowing through my neighborhood. Thanks for your vids this podcast is saving the world 🌎

this podcast means everything to me, thank u alyx i love you sm ❤

52:55 Aww, it's sweet that Alyx said that. I remember when she first revealed her watch tattoo, she said someone asked if they could get it as well and she said no (which is understandable) P.S. 58:48 That's the first time I've heard of a self-aware yandere irl 💀

Love that episode! Sad that there wasn't a going public segment but I liked that there were a bit more written confession

Probably the best podcasts I've ever listened to! Keep up the good work Alyx it helps knowing other people are going through things and actually hearing about them

i’m so sorry but i physically cannot watch the eps with meredith IDK i just feel super uneasy watching n get kinda bad vibes from her n some of the views on situations she has r🤨🤨 especially considering she’s a therapist .. but maybe that’s just me🥴

LMAOO not the girl on the voicemail saying "oh well" 🤣 me when my life is falling apart

LMAOO I'm cackling over the *hummus* 🤣

13:30 hummus hahahha

This episode had quite a few L takes

Alyx can u find a different therapist bc I’m really not liking Meredith & I really haven’t been liking her all that much bc her takes are weird sometimes it’s a little😟😟

I don't sleep with a stuffed animal but I have to sleep with my furry blankie. It might as well be a stuffed animal 😂

I’m kind of confused. Is it actually good for a therapist to tell someone “If you’re going to do cocaine… test it for fentanyl.” “If you’re going to cut… use a clean blade.” Uh wtw? Shouldn’t you be telling people better ways to cope instead? I feel like saying things like that is encouraging them to continue… Also, why was there no quasi confessions? I understand there were a few negative comments last week but that was one of my fave segments. 😭

not this episode but in most episodes i find myself audibly yelling "ALEX" whenever she says something shocking and its really embarrassing considering im around other people alot, the podcast makes you feel like you are apart of the debating that goes on and i afore it for that

Love this as always! ❤️

maybe I'm just overreacting I really hated the takes Meredith made the victim blaming makes me very uncomfortable .If someone doesn't want their s/o to watch porn isn't a form of insecurity the porn industry is awful to woman. It's common for videos of cp and rape to be uploaded on to porn sites and it's normal to not want your partner to get off to someone that's not you.

yeah i could not finish this one. meredith's perspectives on basically everything this episode irked me so bad i could not get through it. i've gotten to the point where i have to skip entire episodes where she is featured

I was waiting for this!!!

i miss the old revealing your secrets

Usually I don’t comment my opinion on KZfaq videos but as much as I obsess over this podcast I kinda feel as though this episode wasn’t as good as the others. and it was helpful but it was really serious which sadly doesn’t make it funny like the other episodes and I feel like we barely got to hear secrets it was mostly them just taking. As much as this makes me sound mean i really love the podcast and of course I’ll be back next week. I just wasn’t “as satisfied “ this week

Love your podcast Alyx this is such a unique format and idea

Yeah I think we could do without Meredith on this podcast. Looking through these comments it seems like no one likes Meredith’s takes and they are actually quite problematic.

I think people should be mindful that Meredith is not as used to being on such a public platform. I don’t agree either but she is 1. a person that has to put herself in the position of others for a job so i can see how her opinions might be affected and 2. Is decently older than i would think most of us watching are so there’s a generational gap to consider

DYIN MY HAIR AND SHE POSTS ugh love her

am i the only one who doesn’t like meredith at all??

Love love love as always ❤️

YES IM SO EARLY I LOVE YOU GUYS SO FUCKING MUCH, i’m dealing with deep depression and these give me a genuine smile❤️❤️❤️❤️

I dont think i like the therapist. She preached how she was so good at being a therapist but miss girl with all due respect…go back to being a lawyer. One of my submissions were included in this and idk how to feel abt her advice tbh😳 i felt like she was excusing male behaviour for a lot of this. Sucks:(

I can hardly get through the episodes with Meredith

I had to stop when Meredith started talking about "male and female brains". I'm out.

OMG YASS NEW VID I LOVE YOU

i relate to that person who is very obsessed with the person they're in love with :( ive definitely been there. it's no where near as bad anymore, thankfully. but im definitely in love with them, and love no longer involves obsession and insecurity and all i wish for them is success and happiness no matter what. she is still my favourite person and i deeply deeply love her, and i always will. im just glad there's another person i can relate to

I came here from Spotify to see if everyone was feeling the same way about this therapist. I would NEVER trust this therapist to give genuine unbiased opinions on these topics. Really disappointing to hear these things.

Really disliked Meredith to begin with, now even more so. Alyx, please don’t bring her back.

long story short my significant other asked me if i had been doing therapy recently bc i was using a lot of therapy words... its thursday and i finally realized its from this podcast 😅. Honestly i think i love this podcast so much for the fact it almost makes me feel like im group therapy again, esp when its people dealing with similar things as me

i don’t think this therapist is a very good one. stop giving excuses for men as if there aren’t enough already, i don’t think men should be able to cheat and hearing that their brains are wired to essentially cheat is really gross. i also think she has some harmful takes in general. most therapists would not give the advice she gives. i love alyx but won’t be watching any future episodes with this therapist. she seems extremely cocky and a bit uneducated

no offense i don’t like the ones with the therapist as much. she gives me bad vibes

missing going public this week 💔