I'm Dr. Julie thanks for being here. Subscribe for more videos on mental health and psychology. For more see my international bestselling book - Why has nobody told me this before? 👉 linktr.ee/drjuliesmith

The fact I've been doing this every day without realising.

I’m proud of myself I went out today for the first time in a long time

I really value how gently you explain things like this because I think when people are talking about this kind of self sabotage cycle rather than showing they understand they just end up basically saying that depressed people are lazy. This is such an important point but so often is so poorly explained. Thank you

Shit. I have been here since the last 2 yrs. This cycle of low mood - self sabotage - morning anxiety/low mood- cancelling plans - stay hidden from the world-stuck Why did nobody tell me before, that it's addictive and will only make my mood worse and I ll stay in the rut

I wake up every morning and straight come to KZfaq to watch videos rather than facing the reality. I think this is an indicator of slight depression. I need your book. 😭

After my mom died I didn’t leave the house for two months. It was a miracle if I even left my bed for more than a meal and the bathroom. I just stopped going into work, stopping texting people back, etc. after two months I slowly tried to get better. Because I ditched work they were only willing to give me 5 hours a week at the time, which was all I could handle. It’s still tempting sometimes when my tendencies arise to cancel everything, and sometimes I do, but I’m general I try to fight it and 9 times out of 10 that makes me feel a bit better. Depression is so hard because you have to try to push yourself when you have no desire or motivation to. It can be done though and there is hope. Things can get better

There are so many of us suffering. Thank you for giving us some tactical skills to deal and wake up to another day.

Free yourself from people’s expectations. Free yourself from false desires. Free yourself from mainstream manipulation. Free yourself from seeking acceptance. Find happiness in whatever shape, mood or environment you are drawn to and feed from it.

Since I have lost my mother, I spend time over and over again looking for someone's wise word to comfort me....

The fact that this is so true. The other day, I got diagnosed with depression. I didn’t want to do anything except stay in my bed. My mom offered to take me out to get boba. I wasn’t as keen for it, but she arranged for my girlfriend to come with us. We got our boba and I was having a really good time. We then went on a walk and hung out at a park. She then had to go home, but our parents were really good friends and we ended up hanging out at her house until 11. Amazing day and I was so happy

I had Covid I took a week off work I was the happiest I'd been in years, I sat around all this pain in my back disappeared, I watched cheer on Netflix, I was so inspired by those kids their determination following their dreams, pushing through obstacles in their life, I'm back at work depressed and miserable as b4 seeing everyone at work with a much better life. Having reached goals in their life that I can't possibly reach like simple basic things like partner, friends etc. I hate feeling sorry for myself but when I'm around work colleagues I can't help it. I don't know how to be content, god plz that's all I want.

I always find I get out of that when I finally do my chores, with some help, and get on with life, and I go back to being stress free. But I get into that mood in the first place because I’m tired so “I’ll do that tomorrow” then I just keep pushing that back and what is only a small task becomes a big task, and now I need help to get it done so I can move on. I try not to push tasks back because it’s bad for my mental health.

Some days when I feel horrible and at my lowest, I just can't get myself to move. I just lay there and try to sleep. I can't get myself to get food, water, or do anything. Most times, sleeping helps me. It resets that mood I was in which was caused by multiple factors. I always tell myself "Tomorrow is another day". Sleeping the day off can be really helpful.

The ruminating in complete isolation for 6 years 18-24 has completely scrambled my mind I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. My mind just obsesses over and over and over about some traumatic events and I can’t think of anything else no matter how hard I squeeze my head or bang it on a wall so I just sit like a statue hours on end trying to completely blank my mind even after a 12 hour shift of manual labor. I have 6 figures in the bank but I don’t have the desire to buy or do anything other than struggle to clear my mind.

This is why I will be forever grateful to my mom for giving me the right push to go outside when I was struggling with anxiety due to a small burn out. This made me heal quicker.

And sometimes being alone is AMAZING and HELPFUL. Maybe you can talk about that sometimes too.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking time out to make these incredible shorts. You don't even realize how immensely it helps me every single day♡

Thank you for telling and educating people about depression and social anxiety, I used to have bad panic attacks in high-school to the point where I would not even go to school because I had this irrational fear of being rejected, and throughout most of my life I barely talked to people because of that and it makes me very sad because I missed out on so many opportunities and lost so many relationships. Still today I lose people just because in my head I tell myself that they wouldn't ever want to talk to me andI justify it by thinking that I'm the problem. The problem isn't me, it's the anxiety and I hope a lot of people come to understand that those quiet people you meet in high-school are the ones struggling the most. So take care of them and make time for them. They go through a lot everyday.

I fell into this loop all the time during the pandemic. It made me feel like I didn’t exist. Like I wasn’t impacting the world at all because I wasn’t going outside, and that no one knew or cared I was here. Even doing something as simple as going out for a walk or sitting on a park bench with sounds of nature made me feel way better. Like I was connected more to the world by not hiding away.

Well shit, now I know why I end up spending 1-2 months ruminating over stressful events didn't know it was addictive, but I procrastinate and self-sabotage all the time anyway

Done this for years. I know why it happened. I needed support and help, but didn't get it. So now this has become my habitual behaviour, and I'm struggling to break free of it. The fact that I enjoy being on my own, and my own company, means becoming a hermit, falls so easily to me. Bad combo. At least now I aware of it. I really do want to try be apart of the world again. Just coinciding with all this effing world chaos and lockdowns, doesn't make any of it easy to break.

I have been doing a lot of ruminating with negative self talk since a close friend died. Thank you 💖 for your wonderful videos. They give me comfort.

Hi, what you are saying is what I am going through every day X

Thank you. I've been feeling this for almost a month but just realized it today. Big thanks

If I could give you an award for what you've just said, I WOULD! It's like you're leafing through the book of my life and have found the page where I'm currently stuck. I have always been a very private person but the recent events of my life have turned me into a mega introvert. Hiding myself from the world in my cucoon is safe territory for me. But I'm also shying away from things that need to be addressed. I get anxiety attacks by just thinking about going out and dealing with people... Things which used to be a breeze for me. It's not healthy to be in this state for long and heaven knows I want to get out of it soon. May God make it easy for me and all the others struggling out there.

Well fahk me. This is my 3rd year doing exactly this. Some days, I get the courage to get out into the world, but the next day my body just shuts down. And I don't have anyone to talk to either 🥺

This is a great book with so many tips. Every teenager should have a copy of this book.

Our emotions speak to every cell in our body and tell it how to behave based on what you're feeling.

If you feel down, you need to do things that will make you feel better! This can be hard. You should eat well, drink water, shower, brush your teeth, go for a walk in nature, maybe work out, maybe talk to a loved one. This will make you feel better than lying in bed all day with netflix and pizza. You should eat junk food, when you are excited and in a good mood, not in a bad mood. This can lead to eating disorders like emotional esting, binging, etc. Take care of yourself!!! ❤️

"If you want to change the world, make your bed". Think about this.

I know it's content, yet I feel like you care. I'm really sad and all alone

Thank you 🥲😔☹️😢😞

This is me every day at the moment.. I can't get out of the cycle. I am reading your book though, it's the first time I've been able to read a book in a very long time!

I really appreciate your work Dr. Julie,,, love and support your work... Have a long and beautiful time everyday,,, 💓💓

This has been me everyday for the past 4 years. I am aware of it but it is addicting. And i have been stuck in this rut for too long. I have been wanting to make a change and its time. Its not worth it to miss out on life

That makes 100% sense. And the more often you do that, worse you feel about yourself. It’s a vicious cycle.

It’s not addictive for her- but thank you for helping others 💗💗💗💗👏👏👏

i do this and it’s just something that happens but the way i tackle it is by cooking my favorite snack. whether it might be toast and eggs or something a little more complicated, sitting down watching my favorite show gives me relief and the feeling of knowing you ate something today is the best. another thing is calling or hanging out with someone that never lets you down. sometimes it’s hard but i promise if you just ask them nicely and explain they will or maybe even just a short text can go a long way.❤

It truly is addicting

I don't know I'm depressed until one morning I realise I have a sink full of dishes, a full laundry basket, no food in the house... Just bought your book. 🙏

I went and bought this on Audible! Here's to baby steps of progress! ❤

This woman is amazing at explaining everything and once you have listened its then it dawns on you that you are 1 of the many people suffering from this 😢

Df Julie.this video is really relatable to me my depression courses very low mood and not eating properly feeling tired all the time sleeping a lot not going out or spending much time with my family 😢

You're helping us so much, God bless

Small goals consistently. Do what you enjoy when you can.

Where were you during my college years ❤❤❤. Thank God i understood that with time and experience, sometimes you just have to face the beast, ready or not

This book is a really helpful one. Thanks for writing it Dr. Julie ✨

I really relate to this. Its so hard to get up and do what you need to when your really low. But getting up and just making a start is better than nothing and just maybe it will be enough to bring you up little by little

And that's why i looked for a job. I realized this the time i had my first job. I don't do hobbies, idk why. Maybe because i had no money? Lol idk. But having a job saves me. It gives me a relief that i'm living for this job, and the money will go to my loved ones, our everyday needs. Including my cats. Motivation it is. Pandemic happened. I was so happy it's a work from home setup. But danggg i think i got burnt out. Then i stopped again. I quit my job for 2 yrs. Then i stayed at home for 6 months and i'm recreating and im feeling the same feeling i had before. So i looked for another job. Idk how long i'll stay it's still a work from home setup but i need to do something so i don't think worse scenarios in my head 😂 ANYWAY, thanks for the tedtalk.

Can you please do longer KZfaq videos with tips on these subjects

Dr Julie is the best!

i think that's why i feel the way i do because i need to go out, and i need something else very important x

I’ve done that when the weekend ends and you are really helping me find out I might be having anxiety and tiny depression I’m not sure I know I need to find out. I’m doing good though.

I have your book! Just now realizing this! You’re amazing! Thank you.

Ime ok now feeling so much better thankyou🎉

Whoa I never thought of that 😢 it is addicting to do nothing….and get the relief

the pandemic has forced me into this habit so now even if i Could get out there im isolating myself further

I literally am this today, I called out of work and everything and am just sitting in bed. Honestly opened my eyes a bit

I was just thinking about this today maybe if I force myself to do stuff that brings me joy, even if I don’t feel I even have the energy maybe it will suck me out of the funk!

Thank you for all the work you put into your videos. They're really helpful.

I missed school today for that very reason and watching this. Feeling like this will last a while, like seasons and i would just wait it off. But thanks for explaining, it makes much more sense now.

Going through this healing session rn

Thank you for making such good videos with simple and yet effective ways to deal with depression, low mood and self doubt. More importantly, you have been able to use such as simple example to explain different type of low mood and mental health issues. Thank you just watching your video makes me feel better! I remembered your domino effect video today, and stoped myself from feeling bad because of just one bad event. 😊 thank you

Been stuck for over a decade now. Talking to a therapist next week, finally.

I was in this exact state for the last 3 months, after I resigned from my last job. The scary thing is, I didn't even realize it, because I thought it's probably just procrastination. And it's not like I didn't do anything, I still played games and browsed social media, and I still had fun sometimes. "People had it worse, so I'm fine." Luckily I have a roomate who happens to also be a good friend, and she helped me finally get a job and get back to my feet. Hope you'll have someone like that too. Be brave. Maybe someone out there loves you more than you know.

thank you dr Julie

When we are not aware later it can lead to hyper awareness and realize but can't know to start

Literally saw this video and bought the book 😂…. Really need to break this cycle

Reading it and it's such a such a such a good book...so so basic and sooooo good

Exactly YOUR SO RIGHT! thanks i feel like am not the only one who doing this and ill make my self better

Thankyou. You're my favourite go-to person ☺️💞 Because what you say , works for me. And that doesn't happen with everyone I know.

I got this book 2 days ago! I'm loving it!

SO ADDICTIVE

Great thanks Doctor July for your advices you're right ....i'll move 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍😉

True! I love ❤️ your book 📖 its my favourite so far! There is a magic thing about it… the book knows how i feel on every new chapter!

Woooow, amazing explanation! Thank you very much! ❤

OMG! I just saw your book in Spanish in a library close to my home! 😍

Thank you. this makes alot if sense. I can't wait to read your book! God bless you and everyone who sees this❤

One therapy session with her can heal me completely

Honestly I always wanted to hide away from the world. I was okay. But once quarantine hit, I changed. I realized that the world want this perfect place. It wasn’t this place where you could do everything. Don’t stay on that space for too long. It really takes a mental toll on you. Remember that you matter, the people you love. You matter.❤️

Need a balance though. Sometimes its a good idea to not do things (without making it a habit), and allow the feelings to be there without the ruminating. I find this really works and i wake up the next day feling way better and more functional. Forcing yourself to just get on with things all the tim e can be a form of suppression based on fear

One of the most satisfying feelings is canceling plans

It's amazing how this video popped up in my feed just as I needed it most. Thank you, Dr Julie and YT algorithm.

I've only just started watching, and it's given me a different outlook on how I view myself. It's a long road, but hopefully I can change my perspective on the world. I've ordered your book today ❤

Some days I feel the urge to just stay in bed, I've struggled with lack of sleep due to sleep apnea and it's got to me so much I've realised how much I have become depressed feeling like I can't do anything with my life on top of other health issues. Yesterday I thought I'm going to get up, make a cup of tea and take my meds I usually take and sit downstairs with my mum and watch some TV and I did feel better for it. Not just that but I've realised how important keeping a routine is for me and how much I've missed having at least something of a routine to focus on, nothing massive, just little things to work on

I agree with you 💯

I really enjoy how you presents things.. It makes Me realize.. I can get things done.. Thank you for your positive sweet Energy.. It’s soothing ☮️

Thanks gor this message ❤❤

My sister just gave me your book! I'm reading 📚 it right now. Thank you so much 💓

What i usually do is before sleeping i think bout every little negative thing that happened in my life caused by my closed ones and how i failed somethings . But to me that time is tricky bc i dont wamt my family to hear me in pain . So after that i remind them and drown in my thoughts every day bc i feel like it is the only thing that keeps me company .

Just picked up your book here in Australia. Cant wait to start it tonight 😄

I 10/10 recommend this book! It has helped me so much!

Thank you!❤

Experience has taught me to just grit and bear it rather than hide from it. Shifting my perspective makes the biggest difference

You spoke from my Heart. For a couple years now I’m in that state that if I’m not forced to do anything I won’t to anything. But I also don’t want to believe that I’m depressed. Maybe because I don’t know to be it it different.

Well explained!!!👏🏻

I do this pretty much every day

Thank you so much on the summers when I had no school I would just sit in bed and just lay there and think about life because recently I have moved schools and ive been sad the whole time and ive been just keeping a fake smile and acting "happy" at school lately....

I'm feeling the same😭from past so many months