Jordan Peterson: The Mind of Highly (Dis-)Agreeable People

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PhilosophyInsights

PhilosophyInsights

Күн бұрын

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airlopez21
airlopez21 4 жыл бұрын
I loved hearing him describe his disagreeable conscientious friend. I know a guy just like that and he's one of the most interesting people I've ever met. Most people think he's a terrible person but I think he's misunderstood. I have never met someone who's less afraid of conflict or who can tolerate such intense social pressure. He's very successful and intelligent and my god he's blunt. He'll do or say anything he pleases regardless of the situation. It doesn't matter how much social pressure he'll face, he doesn't compromise his values under any circumstances.
Brancu Alexandru
Brancu Alexandru 5 күн бұрын
@Kai You're confusing being disagreeable with being bad at being disagreeable. There's ways to mitigate confrontation to the point where people feel welcomed to the debate. THAT, is literally the founding principle of corporate talk. Think about it. So. It's not a disagreeableness issue, you're having a skill issue at being disagreeable.
Anidtuno
Anidtuno 7 күн бұрын
This sounds like my spouse and i've never had a better teacher in life
Dave Reckoning
Dave Reckoning 9 күн бұрын
@Kai Interesting problem, not uncommon. An aim of personality development is (1) to become flexible enough so you can be agreeable or disagreeable depending on what's most useful in the immediate situation; whilst (b) being sensitive and aware enough to know whether it is more useful to be agreeable or disagreeable at this time. Great thing is, you've shown yourself you can do (a) already. Now just ruthlessly decide in each situation whether it serves your purpose best to be agreeable or disagreeable just now. So, "I hope that helps" (he said agreeably) &/or "will you now just get your act together and use your full capabilities for god sake!" (he said disagreeably).
Debby Lou
Debby Lou 9 күн бұрын
You aren’t describing a disagreeable personality
Seldomheardabout
Seldomheardabout 14 күн бұрын
You just described a man. Regular old man.
Carlo Profumieri
Carlo Profumieri 4 жыл бұрын
The other day i took a 5 big personality traits test, and scored 1/100 in disagreableness, and i was like, no, im not that disagreable. Then i realised i disagreed with being disagreable and it all made sense
Chickenmonger
Chickenmonger Күн бұрын
@F J CookI respect cold fish in some ways. You can easily undertake ordinarily repugnant tasks for more sensitive folks. As long as there is actual good and good will, and the capability of understanding that other ways exist, it’s not a bad quality to have. Or to know someone who is. It’s just that ordinary irritations are not as severe. Or if they exist, you simply do the unpleasant job of rooting them out. I suspect however that it is necessary to have a strong sense integrity, and a lot of perspective, or you can really hurt… Well everything and everyone. I in some ways suspect I recognize what I am not. Which is why I view the stability favorably. I can trust that your perspective is what I think it is, if you’ve nothing to gain by deception at least.
bek2100
bek2100 4 күн бұрын
Yeah me too and I’m a woman. And I’m good with taking care of others, so I’m not sure it’s necessarily true that it’s required…
John Puente
John Puente 7 күн бұрын
i took a test and got 1%. i thought that meant i was in the top one percent. i was so proud. my wife smiled kissed me and said no honey that means yout kind of an a$$hole. i got worried i mean who wants to be married to that! when i expressed my conern she said you just found out ive kown for years why do you think i married you. dr peterson is right being disagreeable is not without its merits
Dave Reckoning
Dave Reckoning 9 күн бұрын
I'm kinda surprised you didn't just think "well, this test is crap" !
No Sound
No Sound 9 күн бұрын
disagre
Kat
Kat 4 ай бұрын
“You are wired to be exploited by infants.” It hit me hard. Large corporates are filled with infants...
H3XXED
H3XXED 16 күн бұрын
@Dan From ZR3 Of course she's way too triggered; She used 4 emojis.
Dee G
Dee G 2 ай бұрын
Hahaha. Most unrated comment ever!
Sarah Girard
Sarah Girard 2 ай бұрын
Might be hard to understand, but the issue with companies that are too big is that the individuals who work for the companies turn into mere numbers… and that is just not good for humanity. If You know you know.
Monk
Monk 2 ай бұрын
@E A Z I E E then why do they ever need to hire an asshole to go around telling ppl they suck and do nothing?
Judy Johnsen
Judy Johnsen 2 ай бұрын
Lol this.
ramsayross
ramsayross 4 жыл бұрын
Here is a true example of agreeableness at its ridiculous extreme: My mother in law was in hospital and the nurse came around and read out the menu to her and asked her what she would like. She said " oh the fish pie sounds good, ill have the fish pie " The nurse must have misheard her and said " so roast chicken then" My mother in law said " Yes, the roast chicken".
Anastasia Lenkova-Molchalina
Anastasia Lenkova-Molchalina 3 күн бұрын
🤣
ExtraChilirose
ExtraChilirose 7 күн бұрын
Thank you for this comment, realized im highly disagreeable, I would probably yell " no, the fish pie, and make sure it has lemon juice on it and dont make it too hot" hahaha
qitae
qitae 8 күн бұрын
@Laura Evans haha totally a brit
Jordon
Jordon Ай бұрын
I might have done that but probably because I don’t really care what the meal is.
Voyeur
Voyeur Ай бұрын
Lmao wow!! I score insanely high in agreeableness.. my name is Astra and often people will mishear me or forget and tend to call me Ashley…. And there are many times I just allowed it and didn’t correct.
Sunny Soonyoung
Sunny Soonyoung 4 жыл бұрын
I grew up sheltered and was raised in a strict environment , so I ended up becoming a highly agreeable person and have always been holding myself back from speaking my mind and deciding what I want because I'm always terrified of offending someone or getting into fights, but after being stepped on and on, I've had enough and thank god for this talk because this is something i really needed to hear. :(
Cathy Lucas
Cathy Lucas 10 күн бұрын
Read “If you had controlling parents “ by Dan Neuharth to heal without wallowing in self pity, then Emotional Blackmail by Susan Forward to make certain it doesn’t happen again
The Man Of God
The Man Of God 29 күн бұрын
@Seth Chandler it's not blaming, its facts. upbringing + environment are 2 of the most critical factors in determining a child's behavior as an adult, as many of the comments have stated oppressive households cause children to bottle true feelings if that was something you have been doing since childhood do you think it's so easy to unlearn such behaviors? I was able to after and I can tell you for a fact changing lifelong habits is not easy.
Bless Me
Bless Me Ай бұрын
@Benny personality also matters. My brother is like u, more rebellious, and never compromises. I'm terrified of conflict and always compromise. We are raised in the same environment.
Raining Tingles ASMR
Raining Tingles ASMR Ай бұрын
Same here
Potato Warrior
Potato Warrior Ай бұрын
I couldn't even bring myself to ask a question in class today...i need serious work😶
hast0408
hast0408 4 ай бұрын
I’m highly disagreeable & it feels different to me than how JP describes. I feel like it comes from a sense of always watching out for myself & refusing to tolerate unacceptable behavior by others. I am regularly shocked by the stupidity & poor choices of other people in public. I confront people who do dangerous or rude things in public fairly often. I wish I wasn’t this way, but I can see most people are simply afraid of conflict & wish they had the courage to do the same. I wish I was laid back, I’m just not.
Unit in Harmony
Unit in Harmony 9 күн бұрын
@elsa Grace Totally!!💜
elsa Grace
elsa Grace 11 күн бұрын
@Unit in Harmony heh, you sound very much like me. Small talk, drama, nose in other people’s superficial business, it’s all bullshit. Probably why I’d rather do a hobby or task or hang out with my animals.
hast0408
hast0408 28 күн бұрын
@Patriot hasn’t happened yet. But I’ll be sure to let you know 😂
Patriot
Patriot 28 күн бұрын
Cant wait till you get all big with the wrong person and you’re laid out
Unit in Harmony
Unit in Harmony Ай бұрын
@hast0408 Doesn't go down well does it but if given the choice bey doing one of the less desirable aspects of the job or having to listen to their dribble for a bit I'd pick doing the crappy task any day of the week. It amazes me how anyone could actually care about the superficial meaningless crap they go on about (which often pertains to the conduct of others or the details of their lives despite neither impacting their own in any way - like where's the interest factor in something which is completely irrelevant to one's own life?? But my disdain for this rubbish does place me in a minority group and they usually don't want anything to do with me finding me undesirable as company for their own reasons and negating the need to provide them with any for why I don't want to be around them and exposed to the crap that it would seem a large component of their lives is comprised of.
Petite Syrah
Petite Syrah 3 ай бұрын
This man validated why I've been taken advantage of most of my life. A counselor told me I had low self esteem but I knew it wasn't true. I feel good about myself but I now realize I'm agreeable. I just really don't need a lot to be happy. I'm happy to go along with others 90% of the time. Thanks Jordan for pointing out my problem. I am working on being disagreeable
Minneolaos
Minneolaos Ай бұрын
Sociopaths rob you If you cannot say no.
xcw4934
xcw4934 Ай бұрын
I'm very high on agreeableness and conscientiousness but I also know my worth. I don't cause conflict but I remove myself from situations where I might not be appreciated or able to reach my potential. I had a period where I was job hopping a bit more frequently than I would have preferred but I always moved somewhere I felt I could grow more and the people I left always had nice things to say about me. Every time I moved jobs I had acquired additional skills and experiences and always came with glowing references so I was largely able to keep moving to more attractive/higher paid positions. You don't have to force yourself to be less agreeable. You just need to know what you're worth and not stick around if you're not properly appreciated/compensated.
shipaskof
shipaskof 22 күн бұрын
In fact such excellent advice you could do a podcast of your story that i think may be very beneficial to others.
shipaskof
shipaskof 22 күн бұрын
Perfect advice.
Baby Bird
Baby Bird 3 ай бұрын
I am a woman, and I scored extremely high in both agreeableness and conscientiousness. I can totally relate to feeling exploited at work and not knowing how to resolve it.
Tyler Deleringo
Tyler Deleringo 11 күн бұрын
I had the #2 in charge of the plant giving me crap in QA about something that happened a day I wasn't there. And he kept trying to blame me and I said _you know what Rob, the next time something like this happens to me, I'll be sure to blame someone who wasn't here that day cause it sure seems to be working out for them right now doesn't it?_ that was the end of that. I analyze things too much lol
L Martin
L Martin 28 күн бұрын
Sounds like you need to team up with a hard-ass. Professionally, if that's possible, you need to pair with someone who is the opposite to your disposition.
Kat Le
Kat Le 2 ай бұрын
@Dwad91 well use the “left” side of the brain more than right haha. the right side is what we prefer to as the heart/emotions. as a woman who can be too emotional or logical at times, what helped me most to think logically is thinking slow. like thinking step by step, than multitasking all possible factors and outcomes. because sometimes things aren’t relevant enough to put thought into. studies align with why women are more prone to anxiety/depression, but we are think intuitively (connecting thoughts from side to side, while men gear in front and back) and process thoughts x8 faster than men. that’s why we talk 100 mph haha. but that’s the tale of 2 brains. if anything, our brains are more alike than different. regardless of gender, anyone can be too logical or emotional. the studies only prove functional differences. whichever you feel that you lack most can improve with practice :) don’t diminish ur strengths, just feed the brain hehe
Dwad91
Dwad91 2 ай бұрын
@Baby Bird Men are geared toward logic, problem-solving, analytical thinking. Women are geared toward emotions, personalities, people. Just make an intentional effort to use the brain more than the heart.
Baby Bird
Baby Bird 2 ай бұрын
@Dwad91 So how would a man approach the situation differently?
Karhammer
Karhammer 3 ай бұрын
I've lost jobs over arguing with my bosses for better working conditions but now I'm in a MUCH better place than those who just took it. Learn to fight, I understand not everyone is born a fighter but you need to, just being treated like a human in this world is a hustle.
Aayiah aka LadyLuck
Aayiah aka LadyLuck Ай бұрын
We all need to voice our inputs if we see improvement are needed. Its too bad some uppers disagree or not seeing the issue at hand or will become an issue but as long as you bring it out you did it correctly and spoke up because some people see it but they just ignore it.
Agent9724
Agent9724 Ай бұрын
@Rachel Veronica Nope, parents and other people in compromised positions in regards to their employment have to choose their battles. Not all adults have to choose their battles which is absolutely a good thing. I'm genuinely sorry for whatever situation in your life that causes you not to be able to. Take care dude
Sarah Girard
Sarah Girard 2 ай бұрын
The older I get the more I learn to not take bull. Doesn’t make it easier, but I feel less helpless.
Rachel Veronica
Rachel Veronica 2 ай бұрын
Adults choose their battle
Toaster Boy
Toaster Boy 2 ай бұрын
Sometimes you just gotta know when to play the game though eh?
Crazy Cat
Crazy Cat 4 жыл бұрын
This is evolutionary psychology at its best. Thank you Dr. Jordan.
magic w
magic w 3 ай бұрын
@philly pb I know a little bit about it. It is mainly informed by Cosmides and Tooby's attempt to do psychology using the principles of evolutionary biology. It is based on asserting that the mind is modular and composed of specific independently evolving tools (which is both unsupported by data on development, and neural coupling dynamics and is philosophically untenable). As well as this it asserts that the primary driver of ("cognitive") evolution is natural selection and therefore the tools or modules are adaptations. However, evolutionary geneticists do not reduce evolution to natural selection. Mutation, recombination and drift all affect evolution as well and when it comes to something we know as little about as cognition it is unjustifiable to presume it is purely adaptation based. If this isn't convincing, in a more practical view think about how evolutionary psychology generates and discounts theories. It is easy to generate many possible theories to explain any given aspect of human behaviour. However, it is very difficult (not claiming impossible) to discount of falsify evolutionary psychology theories because they are too speculative. Evo psych is for people who want to Live Action Role Play (LARP) as evolutionary biologists. And/Or look to naturalise their political opinions in order to avoid debate.
philly pb
philly pb 3 ай бұрын
@magic w Learn about evolutionary psychology or delve into the research? I enjoy expose to all sorts of theories and scientific endeavours, so why wouldn't you want to?
magic w
magic w 3 ай бұрын
@philly pbWhy would you want to do that?
philly pb
philly pb 3 ай бұрын
If you want to see how evolutionary psychology can be applied to our society and species without delving into the actual research, I feel he is definitely one of the primary figures to follow
magic w
magic w 3 ай бұрын
Evolutionary psychology is a LARP.
TastySanchez
TastySanchez 3 ай бұрын
I'm super agreeable (male) and this was really interedting to watch. Avoiding conflict has been an issue for me in past relationships but being aware of my natural tendencies helps a lot with managing it 🙂
Erick Moya
Erick Moya Ай бұрын
Thats the attitude
Melissa Halim
Melissa Halim 4 ай бұрын
If you're too agreeable - learn to be disagreeable If you're too disagreeable - learn to be agreeable Balance is the key, also being flexible
Big Burner
Big Burner 13 күн бұрын
@The Entrepreneur you’re right
Man of Honor
Man of Honor 25 күн бұрын
@Matthew Frazier alpha
Matthew Frazier
Matthew Frazier 25 күн бұрын
Shut up
Elijah
Elijah 28 күн бұрын
The balance with disagreeable people isnt to be more agreeable but you balance disagreeableness with truth and concheeyenchissness
Patriot
Patriot 28 күн бұрын
@Big Burner no
Nicole Powell
Nicole Powell Ай бұрын
I am a horribly agreeable person and I drive myself crazy with it. Listening to Jordan has made me learn a lot about my habit of nurturing others. Long live Dr.Peterson! 😊
Carl Panco
Carl Panco Ай бұрын
I feel that though it is good for agreeable people to hear this and learn something about themselves so they can better protect themselves, those of us who are more disagreeable would do well to try and recognize these traits in others and do our part to appreciate and look out for them.
harrysecombegroupie
harrysecombegroupie 4 жыл бұрын
This is the first Jordan Peterson video I've watched where I agree with everything he says, particularly the point about highly agreeable and conscientious people being exploited in the workplace.
Andre Kroon
Andre Kroon 29 күн бұрын
I think JP is idiotic and grating on the ears but he has accurate knowledge of the world that is worth listening to and learning from. Basically I agree with most of the negative things said about him in this comment chain. And if I had to make a comparison Id say he is kind of like Andrew Tate, except JP is maybe 50% idiotic and 75% of what he says is worth listening to. Whereas Tate is 95% idiotic and maybe at most 10% of what he says is worth listening to. Not the same people at all but they both give the same kind of feel when you listen to them, to me atleast.
philly pb
philly pb 3 ай бұрын
@EyeLean5280 Very well put, and I too agree. Though I do enjoy his formulations and hypotheses of personality and evolutionary psychology, and the way he delivers that information. My biggest gripe with him is he completely neglects the numerous other viable theories of society and human nature. The fact he claims that his opinions are ultimate truth without considering ANYTHING beyond evolutionary psychology is very short-sighted in my opinion, especially for an intellectual. I've also come across evidence that contradicts some of his "facts" such as hypergamy and gender differences. I think people need to be mindful that there are many other demonstrated and credible theories besides Dr. Peterson's.
Ringo
Ringo 3 ай бұрын
@EyeLean5280 well, Jordan Peterson is highly disagreeable as that is what he preaches now days as what people need to be more of. But being highly disagreeable is a trait of narcissism. It's no surprise him being 'vain' and 'weak to the siren song of idol worship' (narcissists like admiration from people, it reaffirms their power and vanity, he's not weak when he knows exactly what he is doing. A disagreeable person is a better manipulator) are being associated with him.
Trustin Judo
Trustin Judo 3 ай бұрын
@EyeLean5280 sounds like someone is salty that a known figure points out the stupidity of leftism
Trustin Judo
Trustin Judo 3 ай бұрын
Out of personal experience, I worked for a temp company for about 4 years, because I get bored easily and I was able to jump around on multiple sites. In theory, the guys who work directly for the companies should be the ones talking to the supervisors, but on the majority of sites, I was the one who had to ask the questions and look at the plans to figure out wtf we're supposed to be doing. Maybe its because I don't really recognize authority in general, but I was never afraid to voice that I don't understand the reason for X or Y. If it doesn't make sense to me, I will question it, even if the order comes from the highest office. When others look away, I will stare and say what we're all thinking
iffy
iffy 19 күн бұрын
I quit my demanding corporate job suddenly a few months ago after 5 years with the company. Left without fulfilling my notice due to feeling severe burnout. Ive been feeling so guilty and thought maybe i had over reacted, but JP has perfectly clarified exactly what i was going through. Thankful i can be more aware going forward to express myself in my next job, and avoid being exploited🙏
sfk1066
sfk1066 4 жыл бұрын
This video is meant to help people manage their agreeableness and disagreeable sides so they can properly achieve success in a career and follow their own ambitions. Basically he’s telling people what’s preventing them from going to bat for themselves rather than being just a “pushover” all the time. There’s a time and a place for both.
Borderlands
Borderlands 4 жыл бұрын
I've always felt the aim is contentment and general enlightenment. In other words a way of living with what life throws at you without going into meltdown, becoming an arsehole, a pushover, or any of the other traps. That requires some kind of philosophical underpinning that's more than simple reaction to events. I like what Peterson says, he's smart but he does veer towards deterministic, billiard ball thinking. The most fascinating people I've ever met needed the affirmation of no other person or material object to validate their sense of self.
Jamie Mahe
Jamie Mahe 4 ай бұрын
Noice, this guy has his own mind and soul 👏
Jake Grist
Jake Grist 5 күн бұрын
For the first time, I feel like I have a solid basis for understanding my wife. These insights are profound, and of potentially great consequence. Thank you Dr. Peterson.
Sonia Mandal
Sonia Mandal 4 ай бұрын
I'm a Psychology student, and when I took the NEO 5 test, I got to know I'm a highly disagreeable person. I felt very odd throughout the day, then I searched how to be an Agreeable person and guess what i realised i can never be that, plus this video made my day. ✨
DarkDove_
DarkDove_ 3 ай бұрын
@Nicht sicher well, i think what you may be is internally disagreeable then, if that makes sense. Might say yes, but then your actions speak otherwise. Idk
Nicht sicher
Nicht sicher 3 ай бұрын
Everytime I do such test I always end up very low on agreeablenes. The fun thing: I often think that I'm actually very agreeable at least in some situtations and I often smooth the water.
Marie Tzannetakis
Marie Tzannetakis 3 ай бұрын
Where can I find this personality test?
DarkDove_
DarkDove_ 4 ай бұрын
@TheWalkingJoke br I've ruined so much of my life by being disagreeable
Jamie Mahe
Jamie Mahe 4 ай бұрын
Lame ass day seems to me, pointless as your existence. Rubbish 🗑 🚮
Todor Tashev
Todor Tashev 4 жыл бұрын
7:32 till end of the video - I'm a 34 male, who is learning just now this: not to be highly agreeable person. As I've been raised in a family with a violent father and a highly agreeable mother, who was also overprotective of me, I adopted the model of non-confrontation and became scared to get anybody around me irritated, annoyed or angry with me. I've been having hard times dealing with people in institutions when they are not doing their job and overlooking my rights of getting service. I've been hiding behind the mask of being polite, kind and patient, but I've been feeling very bad emotions after an unsuccessful meeting in which I haven't achieved what I went out for. I blamed myself for not asking question, not insisting and not being assertive, as well as having a lot of inner anger towards the people who I was meeting. Sometimes I would think of such meeting for days and would repeat the conversations over and over again in my head, sometimes becoming aggressive inside me, which is a pure poison for my body and mind. Due to many factors, now at age of 34 I've learned that I have to stand up for my rights and speak up, regardless of the fear that I'm feeling. Dr. Peterson is really helping me realize what I'm trying to achieve and how to get there. Thank you!
shipaskof
shipaskof 22 күн бұрын
Best wishes.
mindful cat
mindful cat 2 ай бұрын
oath brother keep it up
Michael
Michael 3 ай бұрын
I have exactly the same thing, I'm learned to be rude and blunt and going to boxing
Naimah Walker-Harris
Naimah Walker-Harris 4 ай бұрын
I think I’m your mom. I am highly agreeable. And my husband can be very disagreeable especially with me and kinda like a bully. I just wanna tell you 44 so I’m 10 years older I found it’s not very helpful to beat yourself up. Be smart pick your battles but if you do something you don’t like what you did let it go don’t continue to fight the battle and have conversations in your mind. It’s counterproductive you waste years of your life doing that and never feel better. Re play the incident one time in your mind and change it try to be charismatic be funny and get what you want in a different way in your mind the mind doesn’t know the difference between reality and visualization. So the next time you’re in the situation play it out in your mind before you do it and talk to yourself and be the other person be yourself and make it work out for you in your visualization first. And then attempt to do it in real life.
Josieogr
Josieogr 2 жыл бұрын
Okay, so what youre saying is, that I am you, just 14 years younger ^^ Thx buddy :)
Brianna Alejo
Brianna Alejo Ай бұрын
I’m highly agreeable, and what Jordan said of “we don’t know what we want” and “struggle to make a career” is so true.
Psyclotron xx
Psyclotron xx 4 жыл бұрын
I love his lectures. He's a learned man. Much more than myself and we are the same age.
James Leon
James Leon 3 ай бұрын
It’s his job. I’m sure you’re a learned man in your field of work. More so that others.
Jamie Mahe
Jamie Mahe 4 ай бұрын
You haven't lived worth two shits then kid. I've lived longer minutes than the years in your sheltered life.
Anna Burns
Anna Burns 3 ай бұрын
9:50 I was the agreeable person that just did what my mom and brother wanted, but when I needed them they were no where to be found. Last year, especially around Christmas was a really traumatic time for me. My husband was working all the time. I was trying and failing to get a new job, which I eventually did get but it took awhile. Now I’m furloughed and sick and still searching for answers. They all want to use you then throw you away. He’s right. The cost for women is high, even from your own loved ones.
Kathy Anuenue
Kathy Anuenue 4 жыл бұрын
My husband's a mngr & said middle aged women w/kids are the best workers; on time, reliable, gets the job done, respectful, good communication, & he hires them over anyone else. He loves that they also always bring food to share. He said they're always putting him in his place. Lol. I guess the business world still just needs good moms too.
John Mitchell
John Mitchell 2 ай бұрын
That's sexist and not what equality is about. Nobody should be hired based on their sex.
Dwad91
Dwad91 2 ай бұрын
Is anybody going to tell her?
Shredz
Shredz 3 ай бұрын
@Helena Lang 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Martian Ambassador
Martian Ambassador 3 ай бұрын
Must only apply to his work. They're the absolute worst at mine.
Helena Lang
Helena Lang 3 ай бұрын
Does he pay the women less than his male employees?
Cameron Coleman
Cameron Coleman 4 жыл бұрын
This video gives complete credence to a argument, I just had recently had argument with my mother who was saying it be so much easier in the corporate world if I was more agreeable. I argued having a mind of my own is a strength. All the while my mother in the corporate world will fold like a chair with the slightest hint of discord. FYI, I'm 28 and living by myself.
Vivien Badergoll
Vivien Badergoll 4 ай бұрын
​@Sf Df As a very disagreeable person, your comment is pretty much spot on. I learnt that I can say whatever I need to say as long as i formulate it with diplomacy and courtesy. On the hand when I have in ly early 20s I haden't catch that brutal honesty wasn't so good in the industry/studies ground so I've had a few problems with that. FYI 28yo male from France
Michael Thornton
Michael Thornton 15 күн бұрын
Another interesting and profoundly engaging presentation by Dr. Peterson. I love this guy!
Dana Vee
Dana Vee 2 жыл бұрын
Throughout my life I feel as though I had to wear a mask of high agreeableness. I scored very low on it with many tests. Dealing with people's emotions is very straining to me, seems to always be a chore. Most people I would prefer to only address me if it benefits me in some way. A part of me knows this isn't relatively "good" but I mostly don't even care.
gerrapk
gerrapk 4 ай бұрын
🚩🚩🚩
Cath Laurs
Cath Laurs 5 ай бұрын
Dana Vee: look up what a narcissist is.
ClassicalHero
ClassicalHero 5 ай бұрын
I did this for a long time. It leads to misery and abuse. Don't be agreeable and don't worry about others. You can force your world to behave and act the way you want if you are constantly enforcing your boundaries and taking your desires. Don't worry about those with a problem with you, they are weeds in your garden at best.
Celine Wanjiku
Celine Wanjiku 6 ай бұрын
Same
LifeisaJourney 7
LifeisaJourney 7 4 жыл бұрын
Insightful and wonderful lecture. I will certainly apply what I learned from this in my workplace.
paparuda ruda
paparuda ruda 2 ай бұрын
Great lecture! When I was a fresh mum, I can confirm I was mentally connected with my baby, and when I was asleep, I could hear the baby movements in my dreams (being asleep)....even today, when she is 10 yo, I still wake up as soon as I hear the door movement.
Almatty
Almatty 4 ай бұрын
"If you want to hire someone to exploit productively, you hire middle-aged women who are hyper-conscientious and who are agreeable." I bet this is why nursing is such an underpaid profession despite how hard the work is.
saved but not remembered
saved but not remembered 25 күн бұрын
100% my observation as an acute care float CNA until I got educated to switch over to the laboratory work. I'm still pretty agreeable compared to the masculine scale, but highly disagreeable as what is expected for a woman. It was absolutely infuriating, both at what the administrative infants would get away with for jerking all these women around in increasingly abusive workplace situations, and how the women not only took it, but would effectively self-monitor most who had enough to want to protest. Pre-covid, frustration was building enough that many talked of walkouts, only to be silenced by the "think of the patients! Who will care for them?" It was always the pearl clutching "think of the patients!" Used to justify abuse of the ones already acting selflessly enough before getting tread all over again. Made me sick. Then covid happened and the new genius corporate strategy to make these women endure even more trying conditions was the whole "healthcare hero" BS. Effectively the corporate metaphor for an "I love you mommy" picture drawn in crayon after a week of putting her through stomach flu cleanup.
Wynn Devane
Wynn Devane Ай бұрын
Teachers as well
Daniel Robbins
Daniel Robbins 2 ай бұрын
You mean teaching.
RainbowSunshineKitty
RainbowSunshineKitty 2 ай бұрын
Yep! When the company touts that most of their employees are women but most of the execs are men, its exploitation. They pay women less and women won't complain even if they know.
THE WISE CAT
THE WISE CAT 3 ай бұрын
Underpaid? 😂 Are you stupid?
Wacky Demon Fire
Wacky Demon Fire Ай бұрын
One of my parents was very overly sensitive, and had many mental issues. Me and my brother always had to walk on eggshells around them. Because of this person being a part of our lives and a care taker for our whole childhood we both became very agreeable people. What was taught to me was to hide what I really want or like or think for the sake of avoiding consequences. This isn't what I enjoyed doing, by nature I'd say I'm a more disagreeable person. But it wasn't until the last 1-2 years that I stopped kissing everybody's ass. I'm able to express myself now because there aren't any great consequences if I don't, like somebody yelling and screaming at me and threatening me. I wouldn't say I'm entirely disagreeable, I have compassion. But maybe disagreeable to a degree that's helpful.
HealthActivist1
HealthActivist1 4 жыл бұрын
Can't help but like Jordan Peterson. He makes a lot of sense.
Matt R.
Matt R. 2 ай бұрын
This man is on another level of genius. I love it. Who else pursues these types of conscientious genres like him? A rare breed.
Light Worker
Light Worker 2 ай бұрын
@D V I think he became a mess when he took Xanax for long period of time and then stopped taking it. Long withdrawal, hasn’t been the same. Disappointing he would use a drug to escape from his challenges. Does not end well
Anita Bee
Anita Bee 2 ай бұрын
@D V Agreed. The fact that most people don’t see such a stark difference is a problem. I didn’t always agree with him before but he was a THINKER. Now he’s just intellectually lazy due to his mental issues.
D V
D V 2 ай бұрын
Lots of people. It's a part of Developmental and Personality Psychology and there are litteraly hundreds of professors in this field. Also, lots of his points are debated and he is not right about everything. But this video is from his good old days, when he worked for others, not himself, and made strong points. Now he's a mess, both emotionally and rhetorically.
Walter Strohbeck
Walter Strohbeck 4 жыл бұрын
Watched it again. Jordan makes some very good gender points, especially the female “wired for an infant” trait” , the sacrificial personality component of the equation, but there other factors at play as well.
Platy Admirer
Platy Admirer 11 күн бұрын
Hearing him talk about how his friend loved firing the unproductive people just sung to my soul. That sounds like such a cool job!! I'm adding that to my list of things I want in life, I need more of these disagreeable people as my friends. I've seen so many people that live behind their excuses of why something is holding them back and don't put forth any effort to change. There are things that suck in life but if you let every sucky thing become a reason to not do something then man c'mon, go be unproductive elsewhere.
Pär Guth
Pär Guth 13 күн бұрын
My late uncle was doing exactly that job and I can tell you the analysis is spot on. He could be hired to fire 5 people and coming back with 8. Actually he did an amazing job. He was funny as hell aswell.
Rex Beavers67
Rex Beavers67 4 ай бұрын
Man, this is me. Conscientious and agreeable. I’ve learned to be more disagreeable as I’ve gotten older, but it does make work life tougher.
1978oiram29
1978oiram29 4 ай бұрын
There has to be a balance. I am a professional middle manager who has to be able to resolve conflict on a daily basis. I work in distribution which mostly (but not always) employs people of lower to no formal education. My job is to help teach my employees how to improve themselves, most of the time it happens through constructive conflict. The key though is you can't take a day off mentally, you as the leader has to constantly walk the walk. I find myself enjoying the disagreement at times only because I know I can teach someone something, hell even sometimes I'm the learner. Don't give up people, the fact that you listened to this video means you care. Keep going!
William Slaughter
William Slaughter 5 ай бұрын
Jordan Peterson is a very helpful individual and he makes sense for the most part. There are always going to be disagreeable people we just have to learn to deal with them in a non - apprehensible way.
バンジョベンジ
バンジョベンジ 4 ай бұрын
I get the feeling you aren't picking up on what he's saying. Disagreeable people are good just as agreeable people are good. It's a spectrum of response to early life circumstances and biology. He's not referring to disagreeable people as something like 'people you don't like'.
aroyaliota
aroyaliota 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you for the upload. Recently i abruptly resigned as my manager is defensively disagreeable. I'm older than her - and dare I say it; a thinker - a bit brighter than her. In the end I told my boss she needs a younger, less threatening trainee. Pity really, as the job itself wasn't too bad. But the manager sets the tone; particularly when the owner is so rarely on site. This outline was very helpful, as I am agreeable; up to a point. Once I reached, it's a point of no return.
Delo
Delo 4 жыл бұрын
Genuine question: What about highly disagreeable and conscientious people who failed at what they wanted to do? Don't they get in a negative spiral and become self destructive if they don't succeed? Anyone has any info on that?
MrTL3wis
MrTL3wis 3 ай бұрын
As long as I'm motivated to continue, failure is just learning a way which doesn't work.
Truthh
Truthh 4 ай бұрын
me so yea
Dave L
Dave L 4 ай бұрын
@Montana You are however able to step back from yourself and assess your strengths and weaknesses objectively as other people see them. This is a considerable strength in my opinion.
Maria Puscasu
Maria Puscasu 7 ай бұрын
@Montana same all or nothing
Montana
Montana 7 ай бұрын
I’m high in disagreeableness, average in conscientiousness and go between high/average in neuroticism… when something doesn’t go my way I spiral.. And either get mad I spiralled and do anything and everything to get back where I was out of spite (especially when someone says I can’t ) or just wallow in it.. it’s a really bumpy ride for me
Paula Harris Baca
Paula Harris Baca 4 жыл бұрын
I dislike when someone approaches you as though you aren't working when you are (in a workplace) based upon their personal perception of you. Early on in my working career I just worked very hard and accomplished a lot. I hoped management was observing. I am an agreeable person. I had a boss who was determined to get rid of me. (I always had trouble with women bosses). No matter what I did it was something wrong. The harder and more quietly I worked, the more they would tell THEIR bosses that I wasn't doing anything. (I think they thought I was after their jobs. This happened a couple of times at least). Ah, well.
Dragon's Red
Dragon's Red 2 ай бұрын
Took me into my middle age to figure out this about myself, wish Jordan or someone like him had crossed my path much much earlier in life.
Super Frank
Super Frank 3 ай бұрын
I find that in my personal life I am more agreeable than disagreeable but am the direct opposite in the workplace. I am reminded of my report card from kindergarten where my teacher noted that I didn't stand up for myself. That actually surprised me when I read that for the first time as an adult. It also explains why my Dad always told me that I had more heart than anyone and co-workers that don't know me well (bc I surround myself with other conscientious people) consider me to be rude and insensitive. My mind operates on a merit system but todays society absolutely does not so simply my nature creates conflict among many (had a supervisor tell me he hated that I count a good work ethic as valuable)...and that type of conflict does not bother me.
littlethuggie
littlethuggie Күн бұрын
I don't think everyone realizes this guy wasn't known or all that respected in his field until he started dipping into other topics/doing public debates on everything but psychology.
Noemi Burns
Noemi Burns 4 ай бұрын
This video came just in my time of need. Thanks professor Jordan 👌🏾
Spud Ryan
Spud Ryan 3 жыл бұрын
Very interesting discussion. I find even when you start to speak up for yourself people will still not back down, so this kind of contradicts the law of effect. Yesterday I read that they will amp up their shitty behaviour even more before they stop. I have found that speaking up for myself has worked for me though, a couple of dopes I met a few years ago would constantly stupid shit to me and I insulted them in a really honest way and they didn't give me any more hassle. One teen that was in my college class thought he was so great, telling me he had achieved more than me, and I'm like this stupid idiot doesn't know me, and he was very dull, so i called him a dull bastard and he barely said a word to me for the rest of the year.
Stefania
Stefania 2 жыл бұрын
My mum is quite agreeable and extremely conscientious. I always ask her how on earth she manages to do all the work she does for such little money
Solitaire Rivera
Solitaire Rivera 4 ай бұрын
As a mother and a woman who is very high in agreeableness and conscientiousness, I support his theory. I can also speak to being used in corporate. I am someone that works very hard, hates conflicts, and dont often even take credit for my ideas... or I was. I am trying to work on boundaries and such.
Dash277
Dash277 4 жыл бұрын
7:12 "Hire middle aged women who are hyper conscientious and agreeable... they'll do everything." Wow, I never thought of it that way. That's my experience too.
Kriste Andrea Tujague
Kriste Andrea Tujague 16 күн бұрын
Correct. 💙
Spicy Valentina
Spicy Valentina 3 жыл бұрын
Geez, if I wanted agreeable people middle age women are last on my list. They are the most entitled, disagreeable people I run into.
Dr Tune
Dr Tune 4 жыл бұрын
I married one. They're super reliable partners. There are some cons (from my perspective) but of course I'm far from perfect (low conscientious, fairly disagreeable, creative). That combination is not an easy pairing (as Dr Peterson pointed mentioned at one point) but we make it work and it's great for raising our kid (who gets a bit of both influences and has at least one highly conscientious parent ;-) I didn't know about the Big Five back when I made my choice (aged 38), it was a gut feeling thing.
BoozeTube&Food
BoozeTube&Food 4 жыл бұрын
flybabym he's all about performance. Totally performance driven. With a lack of compassion. It's almost unfortunate that the whole liberal movement is so agreeable and apparently compassionate that it needs Donald Trump to balance it out
Andrea Tharp
Andrea Tharp 4 жыл бұрын
Don't ask me, I'm just a girl... I work in customer service ,and I'm horrified for humanity.
Heyhoe Itme
Heyhoe Itme 4 ай бұрын
I’m going through a rough point with my career ( or lack of) rn, but he’s right when he says a business loves to hire agreeable and highly conscious women. I’ve been an example, working at an e-grocery commerce warehouse at the age of 18, I was quickly highlighted and sought out by many different “managers” or line production leaders to do even the most time-wasteful tasks such as pulling out empty cardboard boxes and sit them inside of a bigger one, only to be moved from that within 5 minutes. Another morning, (we worked from 7pm-5:30 am with two 30-minute-breaks) I was intentionally pulled by one of the production managers after finishing all of the work we had to complete that day, and verbally forced when I hesitated. They let the rest of my coworkers go home along with the rest of the entire warehouse besides a total of 18 people. Myself included. Eight of those people left immediately because they could smell the bs, but it made the workload harder on the rest of us. I cannot blame them though nor do I hold any animosity, but this was a very good conversation to have. Now, these days, I’m highly disagreeable and it doesn’t make it so fun, but it’s truly more due to high defensiveness from not giving myself at least that for my entire childhood and adolescence. Hell, I’m only 20 now, which is still pretty young and I know I’ve got a lot to learn. Everyone does. I’d just rather be safe than sorry. I’ll let you in on a secret though, I do feel remorse after any confrontation, especially afterwards I’ll just immediately blame myself and invalidate all of my behavior, but in the moment I’m only thinking of defending myself, however; I will always admit to when I’m wrong and I expect the other person to do the same. That’s the frustrating part. You can’t change people so that’s why boundaries and a sense of self worth is indeed important among many other qualities. Stay safe to all but evil people, with much love 💗
Mattia Breda
Mattia Breda 3 ай бұрын
Wish i was so smart at 20
Naimah Walker-Harris
Naimah Walker-Harris 4 ай бұрын
Wow you put that very well and I’m happy for you to learn that lesson and only be 20 is priceless. I’ve spent most of my adult life and most of my childhood being agreeable. It makes it extremely difficult to even be fair. Especially to myself. I’ve been in positions with people made my life absolute hell and by luck or happenstance I got a leg up on those people and was in a position to punish them. Or too at the very least hold them accountable for the things they did to make my life hell. But I didn’t do it I wonder now that I’m older if my life would’ve been better if I had taken those opportunities to exercise the power to give those people they’re just dues. To punish them write them the bad evaluation or just sending a letter expressing what was done. Not so much to punish them but to validate my own feelings of hurt and to acknowledge that I was abused. I think if I had taken those opportunities my life would be better I think I would be in a better place especially mentally. I think you can only get hit so many times. Before you begin to feel less then. So once again I’m happy that you’re doing this at 20. Don’t feel guilty know that you’re doing the right thing. I think when you lay down and let people walk on you it’s a betrayal to yourself.
Anna Burns
Anna Burns 3 ай бұрын
This video has helped me so much understanding my life. My brother acted like he hated me after He had kids. But now, I understand that he just wanted me to “grow up “ and take responsibility for my life. Which I am trying to do but I am sick a lot and have a lot of trauma in my life. I used to get really angry and have huge fights with my husband and it was never worth it. So I have learned that fighting for my life is not the way to go. So I feel in a way that I am at a crossroads now, where I have to do as much as I can without it causing conflict and without it putting more stress and trauma on my body. But that feels like doing nothing. And I can’t be a responsible adult if I do nothing. So how do I find the right balance in all of this?
Wombat3
Wombat3 2 ай бұрын
This video really realize how disagreeable I am.. how that differs from most others. Very enlightening. What a wise dude.
Niels de Ruiter
Niels de Ruiter Жыл бұрын
I scored the second percentile at agreeableness, first percentile at compassion and 98th percentile in neuroticism, which means that I'm quite the unbearable person. I can't keep friends, I have a relationship but that's not going well either. I'm trying to change and all useful tips are welcome, so please share a few if you have them, my life is not miserable but it's certainly no fun for me, let alone other people.
Dayzy
Dayzy 3 ай бұрын
@Niels de Ruiter Well God bless you, Niels, and hope this decision fares well with your life! You're right, humility is the key. Great talking with you. Have a blessed Day!
Niels de Ruiter
Niels de Ruiter 3 ай бұрын
@Dayzy Well, maybe. God sounds acceptable for me and I try to live as if I get judged when I die, but the rest sounds too wishy-washy and I'd encourage you to read John M Allegro's Sacred Mushroom and the Cross. If you like to live a humble life then that's fine with me, but that's not the life I can live, my intellect and work ethic just won't let me. If you're right then that's a bad deal for me, but I consider the chance that the answer is to be found in humility exceptionally low; so I'll take the risk.
Dayzy
Dayzy 4 ай бұрын
@Niels de Ruiter I felt sorry for you thinking you will have no choice but to stay on that unhappy and lonely path, UNLESS a true change of heart happens. "I" is in the middle of p-r-I-d-e. Me, myself and I. Unless we discover humility before God and others, HE can't be on the Thone of our lives. How can you be truly happy when you're on them Throne and HE'S not? Only God can change you from the inside out. After all HE made you and HE knows what it'll take to FIX what ails you. You didn't make it on this planet by creating yourself. HE did. We wouldn't be here if HE didnt. And unless we understand that, we can never be happy doing and living things "our way" apart from HIM. Our real inner "security" is NOT in things, people, ourselves- it's knowing HE loves and created us into being. Psalm 139. We have a divine purpose.. If we don't follow the "manual" for machines, cars or toys, we can't make it work or enjoy the purpose for what it was created for. We were created for HIS pleasure, not ours. How can we possibly be happy and encouraged apart from how HE intended us to be? Apart from HIm, we can do nothing, we can't be happy or satisfied. Why should HE bless and make things work out for a rebellious and disobedient child, wanting his own way in life? In HIM is love, joy, peace . . . . ( Galatians 5:22-26) but doing things "our way " is frustration, loneliness, strife, stress . . (Galatians 5:19-21). In the end we make our own hell apart from Jesus. BUT it doesn't have to end that way. Jesus gave us a choice. HE doesn't want robots. I pray GOD opens your eyes to enjoy the Life HE intended you to have. GOD bless.
Niels de Ruiter
Niels de Ruiter 4 ай бұрын
@Dayzy Thanks for replying. I agree with most of what you've said but I'm no longer the same guy. Radical change was needed. I fix everything that's in need of repair and a few people actually said that it's a pleasure to have me around nowadays so I'm doing pretty good. So, I'll see how much of a real man I can become, I'm taking on more responsibility every single day and I'm nowhere near my limit yet. By the way, I encourage you to never ever feel sorry for someone. I felt sorry for people (and obviously foor myself too) in the past but I'll never do that again. The most important lesson I've learned so far is that everyone always gets what he or she deserves, and I damn well deserved the self-imposed misery too.
Dayzy
Dayzy 4 ай бұрын
You are the type who likes to shell it out to people, but who don't like to take. Like you are right, and others are inferior to you. Who made you God? Until you humble yourself and not think pride is a virtue, you will be alone in this life until you die. So you will be right, but right all by yourself. No one in their right mind wants to deal with someone who's life revolves around themselves, and expects everyone to cater to their needs. You don't know the meaning of love ( thinking more of others than your own self centered plans) so how in the world do you expect it of others??? In order to have friends, you've got TO BE ONE. No good woman is going to stick around an emotional leech. You seem to care only about yourself and totally nothing about caring about others and how they feel about having to live with someone like you? It's true, you will reap what you have sown. What goes around, comes around. And in the end, unless you seek changes in your attitude, you will be alone the rest of your life. You don't need people, you need robots. Uncaring, unsociable, wanting only what it can get from people . . . . Just like you. You can shell it out. But can you take it??? I can only feel sorry for you.
doctoracharito
doctoracharito 4 ай бұрын
I hope these students know how privileged they were , having this professor..
Frank Teng
Frank Teng 2 ай бұрын
To have a real Professor in these days when there are only ideologues now
Susan Watson
Susan Watson 2 ай бұрын
Thank you for the clarity, Sensei. I so enjoy listening to someone who thinks faster than they can speak. It is a wonderful challenge. Thanks for that, too!!
Youri Khan
Youri Khan 4 жыл бұрын
I've done the OCEAN test too. I've got 99 on disagreeability, which was a bit more than I expected and curiously not so surprising for my colleagues, friends and family. Everything I heard above matches. The funny thing is a colleague, when asked about my disagreeableness, told me that yes, I was disagreeable (or more politely "you know what you want") but at the same time I was a nice guy. I'm still trying to wrap my head around that ^_^;;; I completely understand that fire-o-matic friend. I can't stand lazy dead weight, the narcissists that find every excuse not to work, put the blame on other teams, openly lie, come almost before breakfast and leave after a two hours lunch. Just the idea of getting rid of them makes me feel all warm inside.
Leslie Sylvan
Leslie Sylvan 4 жыл бұрын
Saw the entire lecture, but JBP never seems to get old.
Sailgoat
Sailgoat 2 күн бұрын
College tuition would be worth it if I could listen to this guy's lectures for a semester
N/a N/a
N/a N/a 4 ай бұрын
This really makes me realize how conscientious and disagreeable I am. On the big 5 I got 0th percentile for agreeableness and 90% for conscientiousness. Oof. I relate on being very trust worthy though. I may be harsh at times, but I tell the truth and do exactly what I say I’ll do.
Rapsack 70
Rapsack 70 4 ай бұрын
Same here, i am terrible disagreeable and conscienttious. I just learned to by that way with out pushing people away but get them motivated to do better. I learned you need to say the harsh truth to get them move them self. when they see i dont do it out of malicious, than they start to accept what i say and often start to change things. Some are realy thankfull.
Andrew Wabik
Andrew Wabik 4 ай бұрын
I took his test and scored 2 percent in agreeableness. 0 percent in politeness but 30 in compassion. I’m mid range in conscientiousness, but 10 percent in orderliness and 90 percent in industriousness.
Nom Cat
Nom Cat 8 ай бұрын
I am very much disagreeable, like to debate, question authority, judgemental, BUT, been raised in situation that force me to be polite and keep it down keep it low, keep it to yourself. Now I am in my adulthood, learning to be true to myself, and practice being myself when interacting with others. NEEd more J.P. videos about disagreeableness, this one dissatisfied.
jimmy smith
jimmy smith 2 ай бұрын
I’m very judgemental and disagreeable but I feel like I’ve always been made to feel bad about who I am. I’m starting to feel like I should just be myself. I think maybe the reason I haven’t been is because I’m quite small so I haven’t been able to back it up
Jadovin Rol
Jadovin Rol 4 ай бұрын
This is very interesting. I did the 5 Big test a few months ago and I scored extremely high in disagreableness, however, I've found myself in situations (mainly at work or among people I respect) where I held back my "explosiveness" so to speak, as to avoid saying something overly conflictive when it's not necessary. However, I've also found myself in places where I was, perhaps, too agreable, and I think it was because I'm still working on my flaws and I haven't found the right middle point. I think personality can be trained, like everything else, but you may be limited to some degree by genetics or experiences.
Jadovin Rol
Jadovin Rol 3 ай бұрын
@Brian Tf? I said I was too dissagreable and I'm trying to find a proper balance. What would be called being reasonable and knowing how to deal with people without needing to bow the head nor causing conflict.
Brian
Brian 3 ай бұрын
Why aren't you turning your disagresableness into your power instead? That's the real flaw.
XC Sio
XC Sio 4 ай бұрын
I'm disagreeable but realised early in life, from childhood when I had to deal with a volatile father, that keeping your calm and pretending gets you places. I am not the hardest worker and I will not exhaust myself but all.my bosses loved me. All of them, men and women 😁 I dropped all of them when the time was right, for more money, better opportunities and they felt so betrayed because I was such a nice girl...
SheepWaveMeByeBye
SheepWaveMeByeBye 3 ай бұрын
There are millions of people like you out there.
Toilet Seat Scholar
Toilet Seat Scholar Жыл бұрын
I can understand the need for the disagreeable type in business. Business is competitive and you need these types to win. But reading criminal profiling books and understanding how regular people "snap" and go on murderous rampages at work, I can also why there must be more agreeable types that are sensitive to other peoples feelings, and more caring, and probably more in tune with major behavior changes in their coworkers....a good HR department.
Garfield
Garfield 4 ай бұрын
Hah good one, I can guarantee that most workplace rage is generated due to the HR department being giant plasteel dicks
Stephen Leavitt
Stephen Leavitt 2 жыл бұрын
I'm at a 0th percentile in politeness, which I'm trying to practice improving, now that I'm aware of just how deficient I am in that area. But my theory is that I make up for it socially by being 91st percentile in compassion and 95th percentile in extraversion. Does anyone have thoughts on whether or not this could be the case?
Jamie Mahe
Jamie Mahe 4 ай бұрын
I'd say go live a little and quit doing bullshit human tests, I can change your results to make you think whatever of yourself, think about it.man.
TheWalkingJoke
TheWalkingJoke 4 ай бұрын
Seems very unlikely that you can be that high in compassion and so inpolite…Part of being agreeable is about being scared to hurt other people’s feelings, and very compassionate people will obviously be exactly that.
robert
robert Ай бұрын
For better or worse, I'm one of those "disagreeable" and blunt people. I feel that sugarcoating or covering the truth (being fake) hurts a person's development, it DOESN'T help them. No doubt sometimes it has helped me, and other times it has hurt my career. “The reasonable man adapts himself to the world. The unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the UNreasonable man.” ---George Bernard Shaw Be unreasonable.
Lorraine Connor
Lorraine Connor 2 ай бұрын
His description of the optimally exploited worker being a conscientious & agreeable woman is exactly why so many teachers have left the profession .
videogamehunter820
videogamehunter820 4 ай бұрын
It feels strange. I’ve always considered myself more of a peacemaker and non-combative when I work. So I guess that makes me and “agreeable” person. But while I’ve always admired the leader types, I still managed to attain a good career and be conscientious enough to go hard and firm when I feel that I’m in the right, especially against this woke plague sweeping the nation. Hearing Jorden talk here makes it seem like being agreeable is more of a pushover, so hopefully this means that I struck a good balance between agreeable and disagreeable.
Alzy Choze
Alzy Choze 4 ай бұрын
Me too finally- took years though to find a balance- Bering too agreeable can be parasitic and enervating. Though I’ve also had a blast because people enjoy agreeable people.
Matas
Matas 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you for these clips! Very insightful
PhilosophyInsights
PhilosophyInsights 4 жыл бұрын
Subscribe to my new channel, because this one will be deleted soon: kzfaq.info/love/7QYyDlAJ4PJ0qIBlf0IeDg
Monty Walton
Monty Walton 4 ай бұрын
I don't completely agree with the take on people underperforming in classes. There's always going to be those who don't perform as well academically, and I think the challenge should then be, 'how can we get those folks to a position where they CAN achieve and do well.' Otherwise, we're just turning our classrooms into corporate boardrooms.
DeMich Wui
DeMich Wui 3 ай бұрын
It doesn't work at all being an agreeable people if we're trying to forge a career. So true and yet at some companies where the managers don't welcome any disagreeable people at all where you need to be yes man all the time unfortunately or otherwise you might lose your position (that's a toxic manager and culture kind of company). Thanks for the video!! Nicely done!
Naeda Yan
Naeda Yan 2 жыл бұрын
As a highly agreeable (but also disagreeable on the inside) guy who was once very conscientious, and who has now shifted to neuroticism, I needed to hear this.
Bahir Chamseddin
Bahir Chamseddin 4 ай бұрын
relatable AF
KAL
KAL 7 ай бұрын
Great discussion of how these traits interact in the real world!
GOD IS GOOD!
GOD IS GOOD! 2 ай бұрын
Makes me understand my brother more. I’m a VERY agreeable person while my brother is the exact opposite🤣 I try not to argue with him because he gets mad very easily so whenever he tries to argue with me I just agree with him because it is easier to do that than fight him all the time lol
Carman Greenway
Carman Greenway 4 жыл бұрын
I like how he tends to say "I think" to signal speculation. I hope everyone else notices that, and isn't assuming his every word is studied and proven
Benny
Benny 7 ай бұрын
@Carman Greenway Means I don’t judge information on it’s ability to mirror reality, but judge on the basis of practical application.
Carman Greenway
Carman Greenway 7 ай бұрын
@Benny is that code for some kinda disability?
Benny
Benny 7 ай бұрын
@Carman Greenway I’m not a scientist, I’m a pragmatist.
Carman Greenway
Carman Greenway 7 ай бұрын
@Benny that's not how science works...
Benny
Benny 7 ай бұрын
He’s the foremost expert on the topic, so I’ll take his word for it.
KL Rider
KL Rider 2 жыл бұрын
I just get angry when agreeable people give a pass to bad behavior or practices. It's like inviting a leech onto your skin.
philly pb
philly pb 3 ай бұрын
I don't agree with everything he says in its totality but I really enjoy his presence and deliverance of his lectures. He makes me want to read up on some evolutionary and personality psychology research. He also makes me want to delve into other theories to challenge his hypotheses, as his entire outlook on society and humans seems to revolve around the paradigm of evolutionary and personality psychology, yet there are some many other viable and interesting theories that have credence. Definitely a man of motivation.
A A
A A 4 ай бұрын
7:17 This explains a lot about my personality. I often don't know what I want until I am helping others which is why I try to work in field that I am helping people. I feel like somethings not right If I'm not doing something good for someone, and I often feel confused about my purpose and why I even exist. Unfortunately most CSR, Nonprofit, and medical jobs don't pay as much even though in my eyes it's very rewarding and meanful work.
Press N Curl
Press N Curl 2 ай бұрын
OMG! I've been internalizing it. I just thought highly disagreeable people just had unwarranted animosity towards me.
KINGatLIFE
KINGatLIFE 3 ай бұрын
Judging by the comments it's interesting to see how there a lots of self purported disagreeable people wanting to be agreeable. There are also lots of agreeable people wanting to be disagreeable. I guess as JP says, either way is valid however both have pro's and con's. I sometimes suffer from anxiety so I become quite agreeable at times because I am afraid to get hurt but there are times where I am disagreeable to. I think a lot of people can be either D r A depending on the circumstances. I think personality evolves and changes and you can change. If you are D then perhaps it would help you to know that being A is all not that great too. I think what made me more A was my fears. If you are D try and take stock of your fears and maybe face them I suppose that will set your mind in an anxiety mode which will mimic what being A is like.
Code07Sam
Code07Sam Жыл бұрын
This is funny. I take the personality test which Jordan Peterson had on his websites. Turns out I ended up in 0 percentile in agreeableness. Watching this video feels like I reflect on myself lol
R Gange
R Gange Жыл бұрын
This is exactly how I feel. Compete and win at everything.
Mike Beccs
Mike Beccs 2 ай бұрын
Without fail I’m always met with a Jordan Peterson video that matches what I’m going through emotionally and it reassures me that what I’m experiencing is tangible and valid. This guy is a fucking liferaft in a storm for so many people. I hope he’s happy about that
Michelle Wei
Michelle Wei 4 ай бұрын
I was voted "most conscientious" in college. I am an ESTJ. I am highly disagreeable but if you do good work.. I will speak highly of you and we will be great comrades! I've had my time being walked all over and I gave it up years ago! Saying what you think... will weed out who's your friend and who isn't in almost an instant! Guess what? When I breastfed my son for a solid two years... when he first got teeth.. one flick of the ear.. or two.. and he STOPPED that biting behavior! I do sometimes fight between agreeable and disagreeable but I'm hardwired to be disagreeable.
Far Away Eye
Far Away Eye 4 жыл бұрын
Love Jordan Peterson! Bless him!
Nicholas Bogosian
Nicholas Bogosian 4 ай бұрын
I feel like my core is agreeableness, but I've been aware of it for a long time so I am actively disagreeable. Like, it's not my natural instinctive response a lot of the time, but it's like a trained response to be honest. But people still see my core, apparently, and presume me to be highly agreeable before they know me.
EyeLean5280
EyeLean5280 3 ай бұрын
I'm female but can be rather disagreeable in the ways discussed here. I can be super blunt, I can compete, I can turn off the compassion like a spigot and get stubborn as a mule when someone's out of line in my work environment. But I was a tender and loving mom to my baby, very gentle, all the patience in the world. And furthermore I did pretty well all the way through with that kid and we're very close. I still like my aggressive side, though, because it's important to be able to be tough when it's needed.
Justin Ballew
Justin Ballew 2 жыл бұрын
I've recently discovered that by nature M'm a disagreeable person and this lecture is fascinating.
Jamie Mahe
Jamie Mahe 4 ай бұрын
Disagree with this, the sun is going to burn you and all your family, I dare you child. Keep learning from other humans. Pitiful stinky meat bags all of you.
Nuclear Launch Detected
Nuclear Launch Detected 4 ай бұрын
A lot can of insight can be gleaned from listening to this man speak, if you can parse through bits that you can disagree with as you would with anyone, you can learn a lot from him.
pballer2005
pballer2005 4 ай бұрын
Fascinating observation and really helped bring some things I see in the work place some meaning
Chris BH
Chris BH 4 ай бұрын
I wish to take that test… I find myself disagreeing with everything a lot. I don’t know why but its so natural to me to be highly skeptical of everything. I work like hell and I defend my work with everything I got. When I have to tell someone something I got to the point even if it offends them. I don’t want to waste time going around the issue. I don’t know how or when it happened. But at some point in life I started to become tougher and emotionless. Im working hard now on understanding the other side of things. I started to listen more thanks to Jordan.
LilNikki
LilNikki 2 ай бұрын
Wow this was interesting and needed as a middle aged woman…seriously accurate. I learned deliver the truth but respect the fact that infants don’t like it at all.
northpappyflappy
northpappyflappy 4 жыл бұрын
Great video! Insightful for agreeable people such as myself.
Charlene Black
Charlene Black 10 күн бұрын
Having a baby completely changed my personality. I was a b*tch who said anything I wanted and didn't care to hurry feelings. After the baby, I was quiet and introverted. It was quite astonishing.
Cam Israel
Cam Israel 3 ай бұрын
I took his big 5 personality test and actually scored a ZERO on the disagreeable aspect. A ZERO! I thought to myself “I don’t agree with this test at all” and then I heard in my mind Peterson say “HA! Gotcha” 😂. All jokes aside I disagree with it lol
elliot skunk
elliot skunk Ай бұрын
wow. powerful stuff. I'm going to make myself more disagreeable. the nuggets are there. reflecting on my life and where I shouldve spoke up. shouldve spoken the truth. but I didn't because I was afraid of upset. that changes now. we have to speak the truth. else tyranny prevails
Rob F
Rob F Күн бұрын
Interesting take, I used to think "oh, these students in my group have other projects etc in other subjects they're failing" then realised that is only hurting me and thus I should be less agreeable with them lest they drag me down with their incompetence. You're here to do a job, I'm not your therapist. There are 168 hours in a week. 112 hours remain after sleeping. If you can't spend the remaining 72 hours after study sorting your life and other things, you need a professional not me
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