If you'd like to help me make more videos and support my channel, you can donate over here: www.napiorkowska.net/donations my instagram: napiorkowska xx

i start to realise how much depressed people despise depression, which i can totally understand. but i feel like depression is comforting to me. i guess it’s because my first depression started when i was 13 and now i’m 17 i’m falling back again. But i dont mind. it’s exhausting and even painful and has a lot of darkness, but it’s kinda all i know. i feel the comfort in being numb yk

Hey... If you're scrolling down through the comments in the middle of the night, hopeless, here is a reminder for you: you're so strong and precious and wonderful. You're so strong because you're fighting with negative thoughts everyday, and I know that you'll overcome them one day. And when you look back, you'll be proud of yourself because i am proud of you for getting out of bed everyday no matter what. Even though i don't personally know you, i know that you're an amazing person just because it's you. Remember that. You're worthy. You deserve to be loved. And you're loved. I love you. Treat yourself kindly ❤️

“You know that sleep won’t give you the relief that you so desperately need” felt that…

All alone with my thoughts everyday and everynight hoping the next day when you wake up it gets better. The worst part is it doesn't.

Nights are harder than mornings. I can't stop thinking . I wish I had a button and that would stop my mind and thinking. Life would be easier for me . But I don't have a button or something like that. And thinking makes me go crazy .

' ''why me?'', you ask, but there is no answer. ' Actually, you're right.

kat, i've been following you for at least 5 years and you're the one who - genuinely - helped me to learn english. your videos are like a breath of fresh air, your voice is so calming and you have a way with words that i can't even begin to describe. i'm really excited to see your next videos and your future on youtube - or maybe "somewhere" else -. i hope you have an amazing day, take care of yourself and your loved ones - same to you stranger if you're reading this - keep it up kat! love, mathilde.

Really feeling this lately. It is 5:12 AM and I am still awake. I fell back into this hole a couple months ago and I am so angry at myself for not being able to get out of it. Before that I was doing so good-perfect I’d say- and now I feel like a failure. The thing is that as bad as it is, it’s much easier. Being in a good place, having a routine, mental health helpers… it’s exhausting. It’s exhausting to be better. For anyone feeling like shit, pls hang in there. U can do it. Don’t stop trying. Ever. There is much to live for even if u can’t see it rn. ♥️

To everyone struggling with depression and having a hard time falling asleep because the thoughts won’t slow down, I understand it and I’ve been through it. But I found what really helps is any sort of calming music for insomnia and anxiety, it usually helps my thoughts quiet down, I usually listen to sleeptube or blue turtle, or really any calming music channel. Anyway hope you guys get some sleep and you are all loved ❤️🫂

Kat your voice is so good for ASMR. So calming.

Depression is the hole in the sweetest of doughnuts.

It is really interesting because with my depression is the exact opposite. I was always runnin from my thoughts in some way and I realized that sleeping is one of a way of the sweet escape. And since then I have been dealing with excessive sleepiness and tiredness:( But it is just a way of running away, we need to try to deal with these thoughts and fight them one way or another...

After I get in bed I keep reading novels in my tablet till I fall asleep just so that mind will focus on the story and I won't have those terrible thoughts.

Thank you, Kat For everything You have helped me with my depression for a very long time, with these simple, elegant and beautiful videos which just show you actually know how it feels and don't just act. You are doing so much more for some of us than you might think and from the bottom of my heart, thank you and i wish you all the best.

Every night I break apart. I'm telling myself I'm just tired. But even if I sleep ''enough" , I still end up having mental breakdowns. Seeing this video rn is like putting a mirror to myself that this is might be more than just being tired. Well, you'd think after 4 years I'd get the clue....

thank you so much kat, you really help me, its like you listen to my thoughts all the time♥️

Thank you so much, for everything you do. It feels good to have a voice ❤️

All of your films are just amazing.. This one is relatable as well. Thank you

Thank you. Hearing this helps a lot because what i feel is exactly what you say in you videos. Dont know why but it helps to hear it.

I can relate to this..depression is so exhausting but yet , at night i cant seem to shut my mind to be able to sleep from how tired i feel…in the morning times i do seem to find some relief because I get draw or do collages or paint .. cooking helps me as well, surprisingly when im depressed my mind does so much focusing when preparing my meals that i forget about how im feeling and my meals taste delicious. I pray for us who suffer from depression , it isn’t easy but we can find ways to pick ourselves up 🙏

Most of the time I smile and I go out with friends, but when I'm alone I cried a lot and I don't have the motivation to do things which I liked..I don't know why

No relief in 6 years, i cant even remeber myself being normal and happy, its cristmas but it puts me down even more. I cant celebrate with my friends cus my social batterie is so low. I wish there was something that could make all this disappear. Everyday is the same.

I feel the same. Morning i feel good, and as the day progress it will get worse. Almost every night it's overwhelming and i can't relate why. Even if i spend my day productively at night i usually feel i'm not doing well or i can't make it. I long for company then i texts some friends, but now i know it's not company that i need. They seem to ask why i'm so boring. It's really hard to spend my time until i fall asleep either tired or with tears. But the next day i feel why did i do that? I should have studied or atleast have nice chat with friends.it' s like a damn cycle into which i'm trapped.

Thank you for posting this, Kat.

Kat, I used to watch your videos back then and have recently gone through yet another heartbreak thats brought back these dreadful thoughts into my head. Ive lost all faith in love - that overrated "true love" "happily ever after" love that kept my inner child alive and gave me hope. Now all thats left is the built up emotions of anger, dissappointment, fear, and loneliness which has left me awake in my bed for weeks on end. Seeing how easy it was for people to lose me, to let go of me, gave me feelings of doubt in myself and self hatred. I feel no desire to get up and take care of myself these days and I dont feel the same happiness i once felt doing the things i once loved. To me, depression eats away at you bit by bit, no matter how hard you try to get through the day - and then once nighttime falls, it hits you at full blast, piercing every bit of your mind. I'll be very honest, I've considered putting this pain at an end in the most painless way possible. But deep down I know, that my pain wont simply just end there, but it'll be passed onto another. For once in my life, I'm considering therapy and will be attending my first session soon. I'm incredibly nervous and worried about it, but thankfully, your videos have taught me how to be brave and seek the help I need to be okay again♡︎

It exactly feels like this. thank you kat.

thank you for this one

Lately when I go to sleep this feeling has been so intensified it scares me. Things I keep ignoring during the day resurface but they're a million times worse. It feels like I'm doomed, as if I were about to die and I can't really do much about it because I'm half asleep

This is my depression and anxiety. Sleep would bring relief though as my severe insomnia for a zillion tears breaks me down but I know what you mean also saying it won’t bring the relief. I just want to sleep forever. Love your videos, at times I’ve sent to someone rather than attempting to ramble on explaining as I cringe trying to describe it myself

Im crying literally listening to this 😢

Very relatable night time is when all my thoughts happen I think more and feel so alone in life music is a help for me

I can breathe this piece in. It has become Me.

It's so sad to know everybody's facing this

POV: You are distracting your self right now..

I used to like bedtime. Now I’m so afraid of it, since it’s the only time of the day i have time to think. And it’s been really bad lately. I’m afraid it will go further downhill till I can’t anymore. But I’m still fighting and seeked out professional help. I really want to get better, but it’s just so hard. My mind and thoughts are just so heavy. I’m scared of giving up. I hope I can make it. I don’t want to feel this way anymore.

Fantastic video thanks !! Stay safe and take care !! 🌈💥

I'm okay with sadness (I actually find peace boring) but depression is nothing that I would ever wish for, the numbness seems to have been sucked deep in my bones, these videos slowly cleared that what I am feeling is depression, no one know neither do I want to tell anyone but when I want to open up I think I might be a burden my thoughts and condition might be a burden. It hurts, it sure does but I would hope that all my fellows here would either recover or never be depressed.

I’ve been through it for a month and everyday felt like and internal conflict with myself, I felt like I was suffering and waiting for the day to end asap so I could sleep a little and escape this reality. However, I just wanna say to whoever is going through it right now.. believe me!! It does get better!! I am depression free right now and you can be too!! It takes time I know!! But remind yourself that you need this time and take the time you need to recover. I thought that I was never gonna enjoy life the way I used to but I do. Life is beautiful! There are so many beautiful things to look forward to! I know it may sound like a pill hard to swallow and it may sound really hard for people who are going through depression right now. But!! Please!! it does get better!! I promise!!!! ♥️ I hope this gives you reassurance and hope! Please do not give up! I love you! ♥️

you explained it so well

im scared, this is terrifyingly accurate.

Sounds like someone is describing my nights

Hallelujah so true

This is me every night, feeling more stressed out in the morning. It keeps getting piled up

It's become more hard when you really want to get some sleep but you mind can't stop thinking or when you see everyone else fall asleep except you

Exactly how I feel

Strangely I often feel better at nighttime

Super relatable 😶

This is me right now I wish I could sleep all these thoughts stuck in my head weed help to put me to sleep but it makes mental worse sometimes omg I stopped smoking yesterday and I wish I had smoke I'm just sleepy and can't sleep I'm so annoyed I wish I could beat up depression but I can't it's just like the devil ya can't see it

Tam zamanında..

Me awake at 3 am, watching this...🙁,I should sleep but I can't, my eyes are stuck open and my thoughts don't want to stop scrolling

Never gonna give you up

kinda happy, cauze its not just me

I can relate to topic of the video. I wish I could do something to help me to sleep and be more happier. How the rest of you have tried to get rid of this kind of squirrel wheel?

im exhausted.

Can i borrow your words? How do you explain everything so perfectly

Yes ..I'm listening to sad music depressing music

Could you do a video about manipulative friendship and how anxious peoe can deal with that? Because I guess I have that problem and I do not trust myself about this.

Wish there was a button to shut your mind off , nothing seems to help .

Can you make living with an eating disorder

At present I am in this similar situation can't sleep at night just cry without any voice 😑

My depression took over my sleep. so I can't relate to this. It's terrifying to be awake all night

When i go to my bed, i "automatically" start to think about the past. My best friends lives 200 km away from me, they were at my house 3 days. Today, they left. Ive spent the whole night crying that we will not meet again in this house, bcs im moving in a month. Then, i thought about everything in this house, every single thing that happened here. I just cant handle such a big change, and i cant believe theres no more chance to "repair" wasted years in this place. Im not sleeping every night, thinkim about this.

❤❤

It's the worst thing

t-this i-is probably ME🙁

💙💙🙁

i really need a help

This is me

Me watching this at 3:42 am

That's why I hate night time ☺

How many pills can cause death

Hej 😃, mogłabyś Kasiu nagrywać filmiki też po polsku?...

Please add Arabic subtitles to your videos❤️

Looks like I am going through it. But fuck it, who cares lol

This is me