First

"Ogres are often considered as thick as two planks, but smart enough to nail those two planks together and beat the observer to death with them." ~ Ogre Kingdoms Army Book.

This is literally the "return to monke" argument. "The revolution was a mistake." "You mean the Industrial revolution?" "No.. Agricultural."

'Ate the empire 'Ate the elves 'Ate the orks 'Ate the demons Simple as.

Ogres are the pure embodiment of the typo "Morbidly-A Beast"

Kislev: Our God is dying! We must rescue him lest our motherland perish Cathay: Ursun knows of the location of our long lost sister. We must rescue him so we can find our loving sibling and bring harmony to our family Chaos daemon factions: The corpse of a god! Such power can be ours for the taking and be used to defeat our rivals Ogres: GET IN MY BELLY!!!

Even the Elf Simp accepts that Ogres are living the best life.

I've been pissed off for three days because my roommate ate a steak I left in the fridge. I understand Ogre.

You can replace every instance of "Ogre" with "Ork", and "eating" with "fightin", and the video is still correct.

There is one somewhat miserable ogre: Bragg the Gutsman. A dude whose whole schtick is that he'll be welcomed into any tribe because of what a badass he is, but because his fighting style involves using a hook on a chain to either slice off his opponent's heads or cut into an ogre's gut and reel out his innards like a fisherman, will never stay welcome. Stomach wounds are almost a taboo in ogre culture, and are the only real injury they fear - not only is an ogre's gut so massive that it can take hours or even days for the innards to completely spill out and the ogre to finally die, but it's also his connection to the Great Maw, and in losing it, he loses his god's favour right before he goes to meet him. Imagine an agonisingly slow, painful death that also guarantees you damnation - one your civilisation's medicine isn't advanced enough to save you from. Bragg doesn't know why, he doesn't even necessarily want to do it, but he's compelled to deliver such a death any time an ogre challenges him to a fight. And so, he will be exiled from another tribe, forcing him to wander the mountains as a lone executioner.

I will say that Ogres, while not especially smart, aren't necessarily complete fools. They've got this weird kind of low cunning that is kinda scary when you consider how fucking huge they are.

Him: doesn’t pick dwarves as first or second favorite race to live as Dwarves: in the book it goes

look at how much fucking fun those ogres are having in the trailer. singing with their mates, watching ogres fight, being given what is probably a FREE ALL YOU CAN EAT by their lord greasus whos feeding his boys so they can be nice and happy and healthy and MASSIVE for the next raid.

Eating and fighting, that’s the way. Also inventing ketchup.

6:54 "They hear humans complain about how Chaos has once again razed and ruined their lands, and they just don’t understand the problem." Idk. Seems pretty easy for them to understand. Peasant farmer: "Chaos has burnt my farm to the ground." Ogre: "Okay, and?" Peasant farmer: "Farms are where the best food comes from." Ogre: *almost has a heart attack from sheer grief*

"The Ogres were born a long time ago Big, strong, and fat The little round ones by our side We ate and drank till our guts filled" "Then came the plains and the tribes Beasts, sun, grass, wind, earth The Sunrisers gave us fire We fought for them and ate their young" "A great toothed comet came It grew closer by the day Fire roared in the sky Killed the night and drove the beasts mad" "The Maw was born from the fire The earth shook at its coming The flames ate many tribes To the mountains some fled" "The War in the Sky began They were strong and tall But the Ogres were many We ground their bones in their halls" "The hungry flame sat in our guts We ate the mountains to put it out But the fire was still there We climbed further still" "We ate the Tall Ones' herds Cavebeast is good meat We climbed the peaks Above the skies where the giants dwell" "There was magic in the peaks Some were born sickly and fierce Some changed into ice beasts The rest followed the sun" "The giant-fest lasted many moons But it is not good above the cloud sea We toppled their castles We threw them down into the skies" "The sun took us to deep valleys Below the cloud sea The world looked small We would take it and eat" "Little ones came from the hills Green of skin and useful They were too stringy to eat We put them to work" "The thinlings came in great wheel huts We ate them and took the shiny things They gave us small metal suns Bad to eat but good for trade" "The new mountains gave shelter We made fire in their mouths We killed many beasts The tribes grew well" The tribes split the lands The Tyrants roared and fought There were many kingdoms It was good for many winters" "The tribes grew and grew too much Now we follow the sun once more" - traditional saga of the Ogres, as depicted on many cave walls throughout the Ogre Kingdoms, and interpreted by the notoriously untrustworthy Marienburg trader Yohan the Honest. Rumour has it that he and his entourage were eaten when he tried to cheat the Angry Fist Tribe.

I dunno why but I find your delivery and views of simple ogre life to be hilarious. Other bonus to being an Ogre is that there's no real health and beauty standard besides maybe get a bigger gut. Feeling overweight? GOOD! Eat more of what you like!

This is why we need a ogre mercenary in Vermintide 2 or 3 if we ever get a sequel

In my mind i was thinking it in the back of my head, but im glad the ogres are making waves again. Theyre just vibin

I was going to point out that ogres are always hungry, not content, because of parasitic magic influence, but you've convinced me you've thought this through.

"People" of Brettonia is one of the funniest lines I have ever heard

Ogres are even chaos resistant if I remember correctly, both as a physical trait in that they are fairly protected against mutation, and in the fact that even though there are chaos ogres, they're with chaos more because their goals of killing and eating stuff aligns well with chaos invasions rather than any real sense of worship or corruption by the ruinous powers.

I was happy when they announced ogres for warhammer 3, it feels good to finally be getting representation in the setting

Did you notice that literally every single Butcher has lost their leg to Diabetes?

Greasus Goldtooth is the best standard of Warhammer living. Unlimited food, unlimited money, unlimited fun

I feel like ogres and at least 40k Orks are living their best life. 40k Orks love war and in the universe where there is only war, then it's pure bliss.

Ogres have LAYERS... -Shrek-chan, probably

Ogres, excuse me, OGORS in AOS are pretty similar, but the Beastclaw tribes are a bit less fortunate then the Gutbuster tribes. While the Gutbuster tribes are basically the same as the Ogre tribes in fantasy, the Beastclaw raiders have to worry about the Everwinter: a massive, never ending blizzard that constantly follows them, and is pretty much their god.

I love ogres because canonically they are the peak performance of the old ones creation

While I wouldn’t be down for the whole eating sentient races thing, getting paid in meat and a bit of coin while spending the rest of my days vibing without many issues that can’t be solved by sitting on them does sound nice. I’d miss the internet though

Started with Kairos Fateweaver. Khorne immediately bullied me. Starting to see where you're coming from.

The moment I learned of the Ogres' existence I was like: "They're so cool" and now, knowing how their culture works much like that of 40k Orks but instead of fighting it's eating, I agree with you whole heartedly: Ogres and Orks are the best races to live as. Ignorance is bliss, after all. And god knows that the races of 40k could use all the non-chaos bliss they can get.

Ogres and Orks definitely have the most fun in Warhammer.

The right opinion. The knife ear simp embraces the loving embrace of the Great Maw

Other Race : we will dominate this world Ogres : Thinking what a next meal to eat with mindset like Gordon ramsay

"My Friend asked me if I'd rather be a Russian Soldier in WW1 or live in the world of Attack On Titan. Obviously the correct answer here is suicide by any means possible." The fact the picture you used includes Reiner the suicidal yet terminally unkillable just makes this joke even funnier.

Ogres are the true kings of the Warhammer universe, it is known. Great vid

you know, ogres would probably have the best pancreases of all the races

We need an Ogre Isekai just eating his way across the world.

Now I just wish we had an Ogre faction in 40k. I know their would be overlap into the orks and tyrannids but it would funny as hell to see a giant 12ft tall tub of lard break a space marine like a crab leg and eat all the juicy bits.

Chaos invasion. Most of the Old World: End Times! Ogres: Takeaway!

this man spitting straight facts, anyone else who says otherwise is a hatter. i believe in ogre supremacy

This is great, but please, I never want to hear the phrase “Vore the chaos invaders.” I don’t want to slannesh to be summoned into my living room again.

I'd be down to be an Ork. Bored? Go break or fight something. Scared? No you're not. You'll just be reborn as soon as you die. Chaos? You're completely immune to its influences and the demons are just more things you can fight. That, and the sky is literally the limit. If enough of your friends think you're right, you are. No pesky problems like universal laws or mechanics to get in your way. Throwing pebbles at Imperial Knights doesn't turn them to ash? All it takes is one Ork to start bragging about destroying one like that and soon enough, boom. That's just how it is now and nobody can do anything about it.

I'd prefer to be from an Imperial Knight World. Option A: You're a common servant upon a Knight World with duties equivalent to those from medieval Europe, but with the benefit of Imperial technology. Unlike other Imperial worlds, Knight Worlds are not directly occupied by The Imperium and are just the noble knight houses and their servants, leaving much of the land natural and free of danger outside of natural hazards. With the knights being such a great asset, many of these worlds are normally well protected by the Imperium, the knights themselves, and what is often an adjacent Mechanicus Forge World. Option B: You're raised as a member of royalty on such a world. At the right age you undergo a bonding process with a throne that has a chance of fatality, but a very high survival rate, even compared to becoming an astartes. If successful, you are imbued with a sense of nobility, purpose, honor, confidence, and fearlessness that'll make a warzone feel more like a waltz. All anxieties, insecurities, and existential dread will be but a distant memory. Also you're soul-bonded to a giant fucking mech that makes you impervious to any opponent not found in the most titanic of wars. The lore's all full of chaos titans, ork gargants, and deamon princes, but the odds of actually encountering any is next to none if you aren't a Grey Knight or Inquisitor. And even if you are to meet your match, you're only going out one way. No dwarven axe to the skull, no Nurglings having you vomit up your insides, no being turned into a living chair by the Drukhari or clan Moulder. Just a giant explosion. Likewise the trace spirits of your forefathers will be in your mind all the while, giving advice and promising that at least a part of you will live on forever. And if you're not up for the daily rites of royalty, you can go be a renegade mercenary with your own vessel and entourage of Sacristans and common servants. Option C: You're a noble on such a world as before, but are born so far down the family bloodline that knighthood is not an option for you. Instead you are sent to the adjacent Forge World and trained as a Sacristan. A member of the Cult Mechanicus who is too valuable to lobotomize, serving as an engineer for the knight of your father, brother, sister, etc. Life is between that of servant and knight. You don't need to engage in battle, but may be required near the front. You also must serve and uphold your duties, but are not on the bottom rung of society, still being a noble with luxuries and freedoms of your own beyond what your order dictates. Some Sacristan orders require you always wear a mask, be robed, or perform a morning ritual, but its all a mere inconvenience compared to other roles. Frankly, I'd be down for any of the three.

Restricting this question to 40K I long ago came to the conclusion that the only sensible choice would be the Orcs, so I am sympathetic to this argument.

On another note, the existence of ogres like Greasus Goldtooth mean that ogres don’t necessarily have to be stupid as a rule. They’re just hungry as a rule.

Ogres are adventurous enough to fit into any culture of the world, and small minded enough to be amazed and delighted at every new thing they discover (which are immeasurably numerous)

I mean afterall, ignorance is a bliss, and definitely a blessing in the world like Warhammer

You kinda failed to mention the most important thing... that they are all essentially cursed by whatever the "god" the maw is, imagine having an unending hunger that is never truely satisfied, maybe not the worst youd think but if you think about how the ogre society is almost entirerly centered around eating you can easily imagine how much power that curse holds over them. Being an ogre is like having a black hole in your stomach, its not as pleseant to be in their eternally snack craving shoes.

The Ogres are something no other faction is, genuinely happy.

Hilarious that he says "How often do the ogre mercenaries hired by some orks wake up and find out skarbrand has wandered into camp" And then they put skarbrand in the badlands, right next to all the orks.

This remind me a lot of the 40k Orks and i kinda like it. Both (Ogres and 40k Orks) are very strong and both are too "stupid" to have a moral dilemma. Also both are happy for "simple" reason: Ogres love Food & Orks love War

This video pleases The Great Maw.

Skaven: ohhhh food yes yess! The ogres: ohhh food Skaven: *what what?*

“Fat shaming, what’s I got to be ashamed of, I’d like to see you skinnies take a canon ball to the gut and keep on going”

Imagine tho; being that one ogre who wakes up for the morning and finds out he's fighting Skarbrand today.

I once ate vanilla Ice cream while watching this video and now the thumbnail alone is enough to make me taste vanilla.

And fellas, ladies, imagine the Ogre *thiccness* of your average Ogre Woman

An ogre slayer????? I now want to make a d&d character about this. Thanks for this!

Why bovver with the grindin' and the bread bit I sez. Jest get strraight to the killin' an' the eating an' the money. That an' a dog onna stick...crunchy an' wiggly all at once!-Grenth Bullguts Excited while watching the video keep up the great work king

the ogres have one faction to worry about though: nurgle pro tip - do not EAT little men made of plague

Ogres aren't stupid, they simply lack creativity due to being big and strong enough to solve all problems via punch.

But Ogres are cursed to never be able to sate their hunger. Imagine always being uncomfortably hungry

90% of the joy in my life comes from food as is, so I'm basically an ogre already.

That was a lot more compelling of an argument than I thought it was going to be. The belch at the end really sold me if I'm being honest

Orcs or a follower of Nurgle. Those guys are always having a whale of a time. Probably favour nurgle because they are the happiest in most situations that aren't a good krumping.

WH Fantasy vampire would be my go-to for cushiest life, excluding strigoi/necrarch bloodlines. Vampires are insanely strong, all have powerful magic, can disguise themselves almost perfectly as human (even a witch hunter will probably miss them) and a lot of the classic vampire weaknesses aren't so bad in WH Fantasy. E.g. Sunlight burns but you can summon clouds to block it or wear heavy clothing and you're fine, and stuff like not showing up in mirrors or whatever other weaknesses are semi-random per vampire. In short, you're immortal, insanely powerful and can fight/flee reliably, can live a comfortable human life in the Empire or Bretonnia or wherever humans live comfortably, and while you need blood you don't need much and you don't actually have to kill people to obtain it. The only negative is you're suffused with dark magic and will probably be corrupted/driven mad by its influence over the years and your true form will look like an evil corpse.

I instantly loved the ogres. not only do they look like mini versions of me but the lore is just awesome I mean they ride mammoths and carry cannons like guns.

This reminds me of the eldar philosopher who concluded that orks had a perfect society

3:19 "But who gives a damn? Not the Ogres." That delivery tickled me just right. 😂

Am I the only one who thinks that "JUST EAT THE FUCKEN KNOBLAR" is comedy gold?

I'm convinced everything tastes amazing to an Ogre. So that's another bonus.

This channel is constant gold! I would’ve said Orks but this video has made me agree with you, sounds pretty nifty

Didn't come here to be convinced and just came out of morbid (obesity) curiosity. Didn't expect sound and reasonable arguments, or at least the ones I heard fully over my own laughter and tears. Didn't expect to leave an Ogre. Hats off to you fine orator man, you mad genius, and thank you for guiding me to the light of the Maw.

You make some of the most pleasant warhammer content I 've seen in a while.

You should have said custodes are the best to live as you guard the emperor and get to hang out with the sisters of silence who are hot but don’t talk so no awkward conversations ever. Plus gold is thee best

This video may have been made 10 months ago, but watching it now has made me think. For the most part, I agree with these points. Being an Ogre in Warhammer fantasy would be great, if you were always an Ogre. The opening premise you presented was if you were suddenly isekaied into the setting as one of the races, and in what way this sucks depends entirely on the mechanics of the isekai. Option 1 - your memories are transplanted into an Ogre, but in every other way, they are still an Ogre. This sucks for a multitude of reasons, for one you aren't actually there, your memories have just been put into an Ogre. The Ogre might not be smart enough to understand what any of these memories mean, and they might be burdened by this so much that you actually make an Ogre with depression. The best case scenario for the Ogre in this situation is that, somehow, the knowledge that you had makes them smart enough to try and put some of the memories into their world. This may only mean the invention of the cheeseburger or the pizza, but if the Ogre can't do that, they'll either just be an Ogre, ignoring those memories because they're confusing and don't bring them more food, or they'll be depressed because they don't live in a world where you can just call some guy up and have them deliver food to you within a matter of minutes. Option 2 - you have been transplanted into the body of an Ogre. You will still, in fact, have all of your memories, experiences, and most importantly, your morals intact. You are now the smartest Ogre in the tribe, potentially. All of that talk about spiritual fulfilment, them being the perfect place between stupid and smart is all thrown out the window, because you replaced the mind of an Ogre with that of a Human. An Ogre might not care to think about the sanctity of all life and how the Noblars are bound to their very will, they just eat them. You, however, might not think that. You will have all of your human morals still in place and so you might have existential thoughts and possible depression over your servants. Additionally, you've been isekaied into a Warhammer setting, and that was the entire premise. You may not realize it for a little bit that you're in Warhammer, but eventually, you will, and you will eventually realize, or just know it off the bat, that the world you now live in is profoundly awful. Not only are you now existentially depressed because the Noblar you spoke to yesterday that you really liked got eaten by your tribe mate, but you're now depressed because you know how god awful the world you live in is and, given you're an Ogre, can't really do anything to fix. Now option 2 is based a bit more on your own morals as a person, and how you rationalize the whole isekai thing, but I feel that the majority of people will, in some way, be affected negatively by it, if only because of the realization of how shitty the world is.

"Noooooo! You must submit to the will of Chaos!" "Hur, Hur. Club goes crunch."

In recent AOS lore citys now have ogors living as citizens as well having the amazing ability to control there stomach, and since these citys are often attacked 9 till 5 from everywhere they have an infinite source of meat... that an idea of an ogor having a drinking competition with an dawi.

In the old world I’d be a member of the vampire coast if I had a choice. Immortal. Criminals. Don’t have to get up until nighttime. Best life.

Greasus- You're no meat eater! What's in it for you? Elf Simp- I want the pancreas...

I'm glad I stumbled across this. Cheers, mate.

8:30 its like living in the copper age

The only being capable of being happier than an Ogre is an Ork but the life expectancy between the two is like comparing a buck to an ocean.

You sir have enlightened me, i will now strive to live as they do.

Listen to a few 40k video makers, glad to find a good one making fantasy. Don't play the games, but like hearing about the lore and faction. Thanks for the content you put out.

Loving the content man, keep it up!

Alright, now I know you have good taste, subscribed

Y'all forget that every second an Ogre isn't eating they're basically starving. They don't just eat cuz they're huge gluttons(which still is a reason though), they eat because of the curse of the Great Maw, which keeps them forever starving. The only time you can ease that hunger is when you're eating. But as an Ogre you will never feel full and the moment your meal is finished you're back to the pain of starving.

I keep coming back to this video. I am in awe of it's truth.

I remember watching at the Ogre introduction cinematic in Totalwar and thinking : those people are like me !

"There is not a single miserable Ogre in existence." - Read about thr Gorgers and how they become Gorgers.

im glad im not the only who calls it "total warhammer"

I just love the way you talk about this stuff with a "well fuck it" attitude. I enjoy you way to explain things. It's never been so easy to hit the sub and notification bell.

the honesty in this, it's just so beautiful...

I feel like youre overlooking a massive negative with the ogres. They are ALWAYS hungry. No matter how much they eat, they are plagued by a gnawing hunger. That is easily places ogres as one of the worst races to be.

you forgot to mention about the food

Already loving this channel subbed :)

First Orks, then Dwarves, now Ogres.. The Collection of Favorites is slowly growing.