Outed by my best friend

Рет қаралды 115,944

6 жыл бұрын

Hey, I've been kinda sick. A lot of time to think. I just wanted to share a little story. I'm tired of reading stories of young people taking their own lives because they were outed or bullied or outcast for being gay. It's a trend that needs to stop. Thank you for watching, and If you're reading this, just know that you are awesome and special and loved.

Пікірлер: 336

@jjlama9418 4 ай бұрын

The Exact same thing happened to me in 1981. Rather than run from the “gossip”, I embraced it. I even had a teacher try to have me removed from a Christian School Club, that I was President of. She lost, my Principal stood up for me. My ex bestie even told our Quaterback that I had a crush on him. He called me out about it. And I told him yes. That became my highest ranking in H.S. Popularity. My father had always told me, to not give the bullies the reaction that they were after. It worked, for me.

@ericonataniel292 3 ай бұрын

I think I will keep your father's words

@user-xy1ll5mq4s 3 ай бұрын

Yeah totally ❤❤

@fabulous50s 6 жыл бұрын

I wish you didn't have to experience that and it breaks my heart that someone could be so cruel! The world needs less bullies who cause so much pain and more people like you. So proud of you xxxx

@lukefowler9708 6 жыл бұрын

fabulous50s thank you so freaking much. That means a lot.

@MervynMcClenaghan 3 сағат бұрын

I had person that did that to me five years ago

@DiffuserDudeAromatherapy 4 ай бұрын

Something similar happened to me at a job quite a while back. I trusted someone and got outed. She didnt understand that it wasnt her place to do that. She kept saying “so what who cares? No one does. Stop worrying”…she had it ALL wrong! I did quit that job the next day. Like you, I was humiliated and embarrassed. I wasnt afraid of people knowing. I was (and still am) afraid of being beaten up or killed. I can walk away from name calling but not necessarily violence and you just never know what outing someone can cause for that person. I still am very selective about who gets the PRIVILEGE of knowing my soul. Thanks for your video!

@geraldj3623 3 ай бұрын

NEVER tell girls. They ALWAYS tell someone. Especially, it the guy is "hot". They consider it a waste.

@bingovegas4867 3 ай бұрын

Good for you man...stay strong and brave.

@tomcooper-hayes6579 3 ай бұрын

@@geraldj3623……….or a challenge……….

@curlyhairdudeify 3 ай бұрын

Same. Then everyone started me of sexuallyHarassing men at work. Everyone started looking at me like I was aRapist. I felt so uncomfortable. I had to quit.

@DJGNYC 3 ай бұрын

You are deranged. Be out, loud & proud or GTFO. You sound like you grew up in the 1950s or something…get a grip.

@Jfnc662 9 ай бұрын

Currently looking at other peoples stories because I got outed last week. I’ve never felt more judged and ashamed than I do now. It feels violating to have someone share something so personal about you, I’m happy I’ve got supportive friends but my parents are 50/50 about it. Being outed has put me in an uncomfortable and almost dehumanising position where I feel my identity has been taken away from me, and I’m not a person anymore to many of my peers. Thank you for sharing, it feels good to know I’m not alone.

@robertmacgregor223 4 ай бұрын

I hope you're doing, and feeling, a bit better now. Just remember Dr. Suess: Those that mind don't matter, and those that matter don't mind. I wish you well.

@dabeage 4 ай бұрын

remain true to yourself, you'll find your tribe, it gets better....it does. be honest with yourself, honest with other people and you'll have nothing, nothing, to be ashamed of. much love on your journey.

@keithsnider1958 4 ай бұрын

And now that you’ve been outed none of these people have any kind of control over you. You we’ll see what I’m talking about.

@flenif2247 4 ай бұрын

What other people think of you ....is none of YOUR business. Don't absorb bullshit

@moondoggy02116 4 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry that happened to you, and I hope you’re in a good place these months later. I don’t know where you live, but make it a goal to move some place progressive where gay people are accepted, and if you can’t do that then seek them out online like you’re doing now. Don’t let a bully define you or take away your hope for building the community that you need. You can see from Luke’s example that it gets better!

@LandonStrauss-hc1sc 4 ай бұрын

Out at 15? What accepting kind parents you must have had to feel safe in that way.

@pepsiq11965 3 ай бұрын

This is 2024 parents are more accepting now than ever before

@peterjackbenson 3 ай бұрын

I was out at 11.

@Inthemiddleofit 3 ай бұрын

Can we stop using the word “acceptance”. It insinuates there is something wrong with being gay. C’mon it’s 2024.

@pepsiq11965 3 ай бұрын

@@Inthemiddleofit Got it. Like the word "Tolerance" I don't like that word

@birdseyetarot 3 ай бұрын

@@Inthemiddleofit that’s in your mind. Acceptance doesn’t imply anything in particular other than that it’s something someone has an attitude of allowing for, as opposed to rejection. I accept that I’m a human breathing air right now, it’s not because I think air is immoral. Your shadows don’t define how other people live, they define how you perceive and they can be worked on.

@batjon1963 4 ай бұрын

You're a lovely man. I'm so sorry that happened to you. Hugs. ❤

@jamespollock-wv1zd 3 ай бұрын

Same here. It was Jr High. Worst thing that EVER happened to me, ruined my life, and now I'm 70 y/o. Thanks Luke. You made me cry.

@kathicip 6 жыл бұрын

That was a total dick move from your "friend". Thankfully, you were strong enough and had support to help you through it. Much love.

@lukefowler9708 6 жыл бұрын

Kathi Cipriano thank you!

@andrew90west 4 ай бұрын

Look how well you turned out. You make us all look good.

@stevec404 4 ай бұрын

Some things can not be walked back. There is no excuse for intentionally hurting someone this way. You are right to have taken him out of your life. I recently dropped a platonic friendship of several decades because of her sudden shift to toxic behavior towards me. Moving on is essentail. Best to you.

@ToddBrockman-wr2ds 4 ай бұрын

It’s very hard when you lose the confidence to confide in someone who you put total trust in when you were trying to be completely honest in sharing a very personal part of your life. You truly find out who is or is not your friend. Thanks for sharing your story!

@barneygoddard6421 4 ай бұрын

I'm so glad you were able to come out to your parents at 15 y/o. I'm older and grew up with a dad who was a career Army officer and a very Catholic mother. I eventually ended getting married after the first man, who was my lover, was killed in a small plane crash. Well, my wife ended up outing me to my parents and siblings. Not a happy time for me as you can imagine. Enough of me. You sure developed into a wonderful, interesting, very handsome and beautiful man. Hugs

@sufyanlowel4631 3 ай бұрын

You don't think that was a happy time for your wife, do you? She outed you? How did she knows? You just tell her 'Oh, dear, don't forget to buy milk and also I'm gay, surprise! Please don't tell my mother'. Or she eventually caught you on the parking lot with the mormon boy?

@whofandb 3 ай бұрын

I hope you divorced her.

@user-xy1ll5mq4s 3 ай бұрын

Well bro ,you're not alone it takes one to understand one,i was too,but I just don't care of what they think of me and be happy, hope you do too❤❤

@davidcundy 4 ай бұрын

It's disgraceful for someone to out you without your permission, particularly since they were supposed to be your friend. Some people make your life better when they enter, others make it better when they leave. I hope you have removed this toxic person from your life. I'm much older, but I was accused of being gay at school in the 70s, even when I wasn't sure myself. The accusation was enough to make everybody hate me. I was bullied constantly and was declared by the headmaster to be the most hated boy in the school. I have suffered PTSD ever since. Fortunately, I have a husband who has loved me dearly for the last 22 years.

@jgnmtz 4 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry . You went through so much to be able to be your authentic self and I send you much respect and love . In the 70’s (USA) I was soft spoken, skinny , effeminate and shy . I got called a f*g practically everyday even before I came out. The one out gay kid in my school stood at my locker with my best friend (still best after 47 yrs) and shouted ‘Jon you have homosexual tendencies ‘ to the entire quad of students passing by. He was comfortable with himself . I didn’t want to be gay because my dad hated gays. My classmates hated gays . I didn’t want to lose my straight friend (and yeah, he was all game for hot girls all the time which was somewhat irritating ) I grabbed him by the collar and dragged him into the hall by the bathroom and screamed in his face ‘don’t say that about me Clyde!’ I was shaking and I knew I could be killed by those students and the teachers would ignore my body lying on the ground d because that’s how it was in a fundamentalist small town like ceres, ca in 1976. I survived but the cost was brutal. I abused alcohol, drugs, and even hurt myself with a knife trying to please society , my classmates, my psycho fundamentalist father .. finally came out at 19 and fell for a Frenchman . Painful breakup . An amazing relationship at 25 with a Castro clone (San Francisco muscle daddy) for 8 years. I met my husband of 25 in 1998 and we were registered DP’s in 1999 . We were finally married in 2020 at the palace of fine arts in SF, CA. What a loving and amazing life we have had. Glad you have found your prince as well 🙏😊

@user-ih5wb3we6g 4 ай бұрын

same situation as me in Australia

@vincentmcgrath4179 3 ай бұрын

Accused

@user-xy1ll5mq4s 3 ай бұрын

Lol❤❤❤❤

@rasheed4675 6 жыл бұрын

Sorry you had to go through that, breaks my heart. i too know that feeling, keep your head up baby!!!

@lukefowler9708 6 жыл бұрын

Rasheed thank you, and I will!

@nickkingofearth 6 жыл бұрын

Thanks for sharing your story

@Runway4Life 4 ай бұрын

I'm so sorry you experienced that. Truly!

@boebender 4 ай бұрын

You made it through. Thanks! I outted a dear friend our senior year in high school to his mother for completely different reasons. My friend had begun seeing a much older adult man in his late 30s. This was in 1989 and the HIV/ AIDS epidemic was rampant in America (still is). I was terrified because my friend began living with this guy who was known in all the bars as very sexually active man. My friend was experimenting with drugs and had just spun out of control. One day I summoned the courage to call his mother who was very kind to me and just a wonderful woman in general. I debated it for weeks but I was so afraid for my friend. I remember calling her and telling her everything-everything!! She thanked me but I felt horrible-like I betrayed my friend. I remember him phoning me and saying I ruined his life. I was in tears but we actually managed to remain friends. Now, over 30 years later we’re still friends though not best friends like we were in high school. Looking back I have no regrets. I did what I did because I cared not because I was jealous or mean spirited. Thanks for your very different story. Btw I was outted in college by the one and only guy I had fooled around with. It was the best thing because all these handsome “straight” guys began coming on to me randomly at school and it ended up with me making very nice friendships with guys who couldn’t come out but wanted to have some kind of intimacy without fear. So there’s that. 😂. Be well and thanks again.

@moondoggy02116 4 ай бұрын

Wow, I understand your conflict but you made the right decision! I’m glad you were able to somewhat restore the friendship.

@redpepper74 3 ай бұрын

@magnostadt341High schooler dating someone 20 years older than him doesn’t raise any red flags?

@andrewaway 4 ай бұрын

I came out to a friend, a really good girl friend after my first year of college. We had been great friends through all years of school. She seemed quite taken aback. Years later, I ran into a friend from high school coming out of a gaybar in Toronto. we had a long lovely chat. He told me that she had told everyone that I knew. I haven't seen her since but I hope she has had a miserable life. It really had an effect on a lot of friendships.

@flenif2247 4 ай бұрын

Let it go. She did u a favor in that u found out who your real friends were. Moving on...

@moondoggy02116 4 ай бұрын

The cliche that “‘hurt people’ hurt people” exists for a reason. If she had been happy with her own life, she never would have betrayed your confidence. She was probably reacting to some pain in her own life that you’ll never even discover the details about.

@jgnmtz 4 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry that happened to you Luke. You’re a beautiful , strong man with a clear understanding of who you are . That ‘friend’ was clearly uncomfortable with who he was and his insecurity lead him to try to hide by hurting you and perhaps ‘covering his own tracks’ if that’s fair . Sometimes I had people who would introduce me as their ‘gay’ friend . That told me loads about how insecure they were and wanted everyone to know that ‘they weren’t gay’ but I was . Those unhealthy , toxic people leave an opening for good , healthy people who love and respect you to come into the open space they left . Don’t let the door hit ya is the old saying 🙏. So glad I found your channel . Let the good people come . Encourage the toxic ones to hurry on out . Be well ❤

@jeremiahfawver2253 6 жыл бұрын

I agree with you completely. If someone doesn’t accept you then you don’t need them in your life. When I was a teenager I always tried to explain why I was gay and my experiences in dealing with it in hopes people would be more understanding. For some people they already had there mind made up and were hateful no matter what I said. I desperately wanted to be accepted for who I was. Now, at forty years old, I don’t care. I’m not going to justify my identity to anyone. You either like me as I am or you don’t. That’s the healthy attitude to have. I just wish I would have figured it out when I was younger. It would of saved me some heartache and stress. Thanks for making the video. I think there are people out there that need to hear it.

@lukefowler9708 6 жыл бұрын

Jeremiah Fawver thanks for watching dude. It’s a hard lesson to learn and put in practice. I still struggle with it from time to time. I’m glad you’re happy. That’s the most important thing

@trancedoutkid 3 ай бұрын

Not sure how a 6y old video got recommended to me but I’m glad it did. Other comments say you haven’t been seen since then so I really hope you’re doing ok and life is treating you well. Truly wishing you the best.

@springsummerwinterorfall 4 ай бұрын

I’m 74 in back in my day it was very difficult to come out. I was in a relationship for 11 years with a police officer, and he was killed in the line of duty. No it’s 74 I’m looking again……. Is this wrong…❤ this is the gay life. You are your own best friend and remember that people come and go best friends come and go and someday you will come and go. Be kind to yourself and others.

@patrickwilliams600 3 ай бұрын

I'm so sorry for your loss. I can only imagine the hurt you experienced. I ❤️you.

@shitsugane 3 ай бұрын

I'm sorry for this Thank you for the story

@danielkoher1944 2 ай бұрын

I have no clue of your age my Niece I raised from the time I was 14. I finally shared with a past high school friend. How because of how nice, fun, and friendly she was. It saved me from taking the stairs to the Interstate Toll Bridge to jump. Also, my Niece 😊 being born saved me. I’ve experienced a lot of experiences many people never will. However, I find myself trying to deal with my feelings of not doing enough. I just got off the phone with my doctor’s receptionist. She told me thanks 😊 for making her laugh so much today. I try my best to do that everyday there’s so much unnecessary hurt, sorrow, and feelings of inferiority. Always share your stories and make at least one person’s day brighter day. Thank you so much 😊 for having the courage and strength to share. Daniel

@dougn2350 4 жыл бұрын

I went through high school as a closeted young man. I didn't have any obvious mannerisms so it was easy. I can only think of one other guy (out of 1400 students at this school) who was known to be gay. He wasn't a big flammer but it was talked about, especially by the sports/jocks guys. He was a real good looking guy too. I often though of making advances towards him. Amyway, I'm in my 50s now and pretty much still am not out at work nor to my family. Mom and dad have passed away and we never had the conversation. Not sure I feel about that. But I will say that gay haters are still out there in massive numbers. I work with many of them.

@michael-499 3 ай бұрын

I like your attitude. F- em because they aren’t going to be there when you need them. Also, you said you were 15 when this happened, I would surmise your “friend” was around your age too. That being said, reality is you were both growing, learning about life. So, though your friend was wrong you both learn lessons about life. Happy for you, knowing what you want in life is very important.

@lopas9118 4 ай бұрын

Luke, I had a similar experience in the 1970's, except they also burned a cross in my yard! I never saw the burning cross. Somehow, my parents kept it from me. The experience of an entire school knowing about the conspiracy but me was deflating. I did not stop participating in things that interested me, but I did not socialize with but a few of my peers. You are quite brave and I respect your decision to reveal these sour moments as it will be cathartic to many who hear your heartfelt words. Be you Luke, the world thanks you for your authenticity. Blessings always!

@markbachman292 4 ай бұрын

I understand how you feeling about that. Hey, keep your head up and stay strong! HUGS🫶🏽🤟🏼💪🏾💋

@hidayatadams7954 3 ай бұрын

Thank you! I'm glad you made this video because I'm sure it has saved many lives, and will save more in the future. Bless you for your kind heart and beautiful personality. 😍😍❤❤

@Sarteth 4 ай бұрын

You were the kind of 15 year old I'd've befriended in a heartbeat because of what had happened to you. I'm just the kind that was always found among the outcast, weird, isolated, or "undesirable" or "unpopular". They make for the BEST friends ever.

@charlesjohnston1506 4 ай бұрын

You did well on this, Luke. You described your feelings so clearly. It is obvious you have spent a lot of time processing the pain. You didn't have to make this video, so I am assuming you did it to help others. Thank you on behalf of the many who will find hope in your story. Peace, brother.

@daveh893 3 ай бұрын

Sorry you had to go through that. About that age one of my friends asked if I was gay, but I denied it. At that time it was the right thing to do because I really hadn't accepted myself. I'm glad you accepted yourself at that age when you came out. Too bad your friend really didn't accept you. Thank you for sharing your story.

@serenasmuckers9310 3 ай бұрын

It made perfect sense. Thanks for opening up. It's the bad experiences that we survive, that temper us, like steel.

@i_love_rescue_animals 3 ай бұрын

I know this is a really old video, but I agree with other commenters - I wish you would have a follow up and talked about how you are now. That is SO horrible what your friend did to you! I can't imagine that happening at that young age (or any age when you aren't ready). How awful. I'm glad you are apparently doing well now. All the best to you. 🙌🏽 ❤

@justinpeterdebeer 2 ай бұрын

I had something like this happen to me after I hit on my best friend in high school. He told my whole year and by the next morning I had been completely ostracised, even by the few friends I had. I was already being bullied, at an all boy Catholic school (go figure), but this incident made my life even worse. I hated going to school and was almost suicidal by the time I left. It has had a significant impact on my adult life and now, over 20 years later, I am learning just how much a decade of bullying has framed my life, the way I trust, how I interact with people and why my daily life is riddles with self-doubt. If I could go back and change those years I would do it in an instant. People need to take full responsibility for the way they treat others and more importantly, they need to think deeply before they speak or act, even if they don't immediately understand the affect it might have on person on the receiving end.

@danielkoher1944 2 ай бұрын

I’m sure you are tired of this he wasn’t/isn’t your best friend. You are so strong without realizing it then or now. I can definitely relate to the comment about crying reading this. I had a friend a year younger than me, while walking home. Halfway he was approached by 3 delinquents, that curb stomped him. He lost all of his teeth. I’m not telling you to hide, I am saying you are absolutely correct. By being cautious as we all should. I’m very proud of you.

@vahvahdisco 3 ай бұрын

Never feel ashamed of who you are ! I came out at aged 16 to my parents whilst in a psychiatric unit. They didn’t quite understand it and being Roman Catholic and voting Conservative, they thought it was a passing phase. Six months later, I’d gone to speak a my parish priest regarding raising funds for the church organ fund and I ended up coming out to him because I needed extra support. When I got home and told my mum, she cried, so I cried with her, then she asked me if I’d like to tell my dad or her - I let her ! After about an hour I came down feeling as though I’d brought shame on the family and I expected my dad to throw me out. He told me to never be ashamed for what I am and that I was still his son and that he will always love me for that ! My parents had meetings with that priest I’d come out to and they accepted me for who I am. I told my older siblings over a period of about 2 years only because not all of them are local to me. They’ve both long since passed away now, dad 32 years ago and mum 24. I’ll be 55 this year.

@user-kh7jt3vi8e 4 ай бұрын

God bless and love you dear bro.😊❤

@ronsmith2241 5 күн бұрын

There is a golden rule. We should never OUT anyone anytime for any reason. It not their news to tell.

@rutha1464 4 ай бұрын

Same thing. It's what children do. To compound things, I went to a small country school of a total of only 500 students, and for the remaining three years was physically, verbally and emotionally tormented by both the faculty and students. What it did, was make me tough and helped me appreciate how great life became when I left that country town. It also forced me out, which in my generation I am certain I never would have done. In employment, I always used it to my advantage. I would tell one person, and before I got back to my desk full well knew the entire organization knew! No more questions about "who are you dating?" lol Stay strong, beautiful boy. Nothing in this life happens by accident.

@Tubuck2188 3 ай бұрын

Never mind got over it became a genuine person, and lived the life of your dreams , thanks for the story certainly something to mull over , all the best .

@edwardrobinson2632 4 ай бұрын

Luke, I'm sorry that you had that experience. While not desirable, it's good that your "friend" showed you who he really is sooner than later. The truth is that he betrayed you and is not the man that he misrepresented himself to be. Good on you for moving forward and being able to openly share about this experience pkus expose insecure individuals like this guy.

@TheDragonhawkKnights 3 ай бұрын

I'm sooooo sorry that happened to you. Being outed is the worst. I will never understand why people have a hard time with simple common decency, you just don't share stuff told to you with other people....I'm so sorry. If we ever meet, I'll give you a hug.

@cory4682 3 ай бұрын

Yes,people out you to shame,you. I was outed,not for being gay.I was Outed,for being hiv,guess what.I have had 34 years,to adapt.I know Millions,are positive.You should inform potential dates,most will not accept it.

@paulgollum1 3 ай бұрын

Sweet, sweet man whose warmth and sincerity shines through.

@gerardmackay8909 3 ай бұрын

This delightful young man has an intriguing blended accent. I can’t place him at all

@Tylerlefttheband 3 ай бұрын

This randomly pops on my timeline, and i'm happy for it ❤

@davidbgreensmith 4 ай бұрын

Being outed is bad enough. The betrayal ramps it up. It really hurts when someone whom we consider to be a friend shows they aren't.

@geoffreycampbell8161 4 ай бұрын

Oh Luke, as I listened with tears rolling down my face, I totally got you. I was always the school clown, it covered so many things. I had a lot of friends, especially girls. Because I understand them. I remember on my last day of high school, walking home with a couple of the girls. One said “ Geoff I reckon your going to be homosexual or a dirty old man. Well the latter was never going to be, and I had had feelings for guys since the age of 10 years old. Although in the 60s I never knew what those feelings were, and mucking around with other guys was quite natural. As it was kissing girls. I’m now 63, been in a relationship for 42 years, worked in gay bars. Got so many loving friends, that I’m so blessed. Life is a journey, a learning experience to embrace. May your life be filled with joy Luke. With a few curved balls thrown in there, cause without them, we never grow to really appreciate our wonderful our world really is. Much love and hugs my brother. Geoff ❤️❤️❤️

@Eric-jo8uh 4 ай бұрын

Some “friend “. Karma will take care of that betrayal.

@danielkoher1944 2 ай бұрын

@@abdeton1899 Such an unfair opinion. Everyone is allowed their beliefs. If you don’t constantly dwell on it, it comes back much faster. (I have made other comments and had them deleted. So feel free to rid this as well).

@michaelw24401 3 ай бұрын

I'm part of the "outed" club. My late-ex-brother-in-law outed me to my family. I survived. Sometime later I told him not to feel bad for outing me... it was the best thing that ever happened to me. He cried. I really don't know how long it would have taken me to put myself out of my misery by coming out myself. He was worthless and had ill-intent towards me but my family's love for me foiled his efforts. I like to think that I kinda took the high-road on that one. Food for thought. Lot of healing in forgiveness.

@twerkinthecityhuh6340 4 ай бұрын

Well guess what? Apparently he was never ur best friend ...this is how you find out if ppl are "true" or not!!! You'll find a better one eventually!!

@calvin394 3 ай бұрын

What? They were 15. Teens are unpredictable.

@chryslinfitchgerald2347 3 ай бұрын

⁠@@calvin394 A real friend even if u reveal something to them that is shocking, weather they like it or not they’re gonna honor the relationship and not speak about it publicly!

@aloiskneissl2639 2 ай бұрын

A best friend is someone, who likes you and supports you. You can tell him everything without thinking, that he will betray you.But I had made the same experience. I thought I had a best friend and he was it when we made sport, learned together and so on, but when we were in a group he always mobbed me and as he saw that this hurt me so much he laught and said it would be only a joke. I always forgave him and after school we studied together, here he found out that I have also made experiences with man, but towards me he behaved correct. Now we had a little school meeting last year and he came with his wife and his two children. This meeting was near my working place in a restaurant and I come here very often with girl friends, family, working colleques and friends (no one knows from me). So the waiter knows me and was friendly to me as he asked what I want to drink and eat. Petz my "friend" from the school and later my study colleque saw that the waiter was friendly to me and said to me that he is sure that the waiter is also gay and that he is sure that I had sex with him and so on. As I tried to stop him he laughed louder and told more pervert thngs. He really humilated me and there were many other people in the restaurant who heard him talking, older people, families, young kinds......I was really angry and said. A few weeks later he called me and I told him at the phone that his behaviour towards me was not correct, he began to laugh and felt strong that he now found a topic with which he can hurt me. We haven't seen us since this day in the restaurant. Now we will have in july a birthday celebration with school friends and their families and friends and Petz will also come. I dont know how should I react, my first thinking was that I avoid this birthday party, but my second thought was that I cannot give him the power anymore to hurt other people and I think if he will say something I will stand up and make a speech against homophobie and mobbing and then I will leave the party. Or has someone and other plan to handle this situation?

@danielkoher1944 2 ай бұрын

@@calvin394 Children/Teens for the most part are a reflection of their parents bigotry, bias, and hatred. I believe it was Dr. Freud who said ‘you are what you are by age 2.’

@averageman7856 4 ай бұрын

I hear you Luke! Were I in your shoes, I would have been mortified. Thanks for this video!

@1Harpdude 4 ай бұрын

You are so brave to share your story. I'm so sorry you were betrayed by your friend. That was a douche move for him to do what he did.

@RAEMARJavelonavlog 6 жыл бұрын

Be strong ! What a nice experienced of coming out!

@lawrenceelliott350 3 ай бұрын

Luke, I love you for sharing this intimate story.

@joewright6455 3 ай бұрын

Thank you for sharing your coming out story. Sorry you were outed. I am 68 and came out at 19 in 1975.

@hamishpaterson2413 3 ай бұрын

Nothing worse than a betrayal of trust especially by someone you considered a best friend. At the time it’s hard but when you look back he did you a favour! Now you can live your life!! How do I know this - take a guess!! 🙂 Thanks for sharing your story 👌👍 Hope all is good with you 🤝

@anthonyjames4648 6 жыл бұрын

Great vid Lucien,And i love the middle finger attitude..LOL

@lukefowler9708 6 жыл бұрын

Anthony James thanks so much dude!

@Oops-IMeantToDoThat 3 ай бұрын

That's shit, and you're right. Coming out is a personal choice. Im very glad your family was there for you. Did anyone at school step up to support you? I was kinda outed in college, but only to friends of my roommate (whod found a playgirl). Luckily for me, those friends must have kept it a close secret so it didnt go viral. But, you so go around expecting to be hurt, which as you've said, is horrible at any age, butcespecially at the beginning of being an adult. Kudos for getting through that.

@mrurick1959 4 ай бұрын

I"m so Sorry that happened to you Luke. YOU look and sound like an Amazing Man.

@sean5990 3 ай бұрын

I remember my sister outing me to 2 other family members after I had a mental health breakdown. Not the best of times to tell them, but thank god she didn't tell everyone in my homophobic neighbourhood. The best of luck to you buddy. 👍

@Hongaars1969 3 ай бұрын

Have watched several of you posts on yt. A pity that you’ve not had any new posts since that time six years ago. Was fun and entertaining to watch your posts. Would be interesting to see where you are six years later.

@allanlance1415 4 ай бұрын

My hugs luke! I feel u.. new subs here from middle east. A filipino watching your vlogs.❤

@sillyrabbit734 3 ай бұрын

So sick of the drama of coming out - I did it decades ago and it's heartbreaking some peeps are STILL having a tough time of it. I wish I were younger and in your circle - we'd have gotten on famously Don't worry about being flamboyant, express it, integrate it - you'll learn when it's appropriate to let it shine with your hot, handsome self - you're wonderful and don't let anyone tell you different

@robdeneil 4 ай бұрын

Love and peace to you, Friend. Your story is my story, but my story happened in 1980 when I was 22. It does get better.

@TrindersGaming 3 ай бұрын

I told a girl at school, she said "Thanks for sharing this with me" walked to otherside of the school yard and immediatly told the largest group of students. She shanked me quick to be fair.

@PaladinesAngel 3 ай бұрын

We should all get to choose when we come out. It’s nerve wracking. Even in these new times. I think you are totally right. You don’t need people in your life who will judge you for things you can’t help or can’t change. It’s a big favour they are doing for you actually, weeding out those numpties who aren’t going to value add to your life and only bring you down.

@shydreamguyman4098 3 ай бұрын

i'm sorry that happened to you . i know it sucks . what helps me most is that as adults we get to decide who we are going to be and who we associate with .

@1BSDjunkie 3 ай бұрын

I came out to my best friend over the phone and he said, "That's ok. We're still friends." - Thought it extremely sweet at the time that he was so accepting. He was getting divorced, so I didn't call him. I didn't want to add to his current turmoil. Called him a few years later. He told me that it was MY turn to call him and that I hurt his kids. And so we were no longer friends. Took me decades to get over the heartache. Do not bother being friends with anyone who doesn't love you back. And he did not. Decades later, I now view the "We're still friends" as going from best friend to "still hanging onto friendship".

@Mabeylater293 6 жыл бұрын

His lost. Forget him.

@time3735 3 ай бұрын

I love how this just randomly popped on my feeds.

@yves0404 3 ай бұрын

Thank you for sharing your story-❤ God bless you on your way dearest brother! Sisterly greetings from Berlin

@2gther4ever 3 ай бұрын

I came out to my sister first when I was 19, then my mum, they were OK, my family supported me. In the early 70’s it was tougher then than now, I think. After that I lead my life and only if asked I said, no reason to say otherwise. I’ve worked in the Middle East for many, many years and I’ve been OK, don’t believe all you read or hear about the Middle East (Gulf). Thanks for sharing your story.

@user-in2vb6bt5g 3 ай бұрын

❤❤ I completely agree with you, I was outted similarly. Thank you for sharing!❤

@tedhoward6735 2 ай бұрын

Great to hear...life gets better..choose your friends carefully.

@dragoncrackers7660 3 ай бұрын

When I was 14, I reacted badly to one of my best friends coming out. He was clearly gay; there was no doubt about it. He sometimes got bullied about it and I often took up for him. He told me he was straight for several years but I knew he wasnt. Then he actually came out. We had returned to school from summer break and we were outside in the school courtyard. There were dozens of students out there and a group of boys had come up to our group and started calling him out and he just came out right then and there. I didnt know what to do so I started distancing from him. He started hanging out with another group and I stopped taking up for him, just completely ignored him, wouldn't take his calls or respond to texts. We were on the same tennis team and the team picked on him too and he quickly quit the team. He was being bullied even more and I knew I should have stood by him but I didnt. I really regretted the way I handled that. It was the probably the worst thing I ever did and I knew it was wrong, even at that time. When we got to collage, we had coincidentally ended up at the same one and nobody else from our school was there.. that I knew of. I still felt guilty about it even all those years later. One day I approached him and we talked about it. I apologized and he told that he remembered that really well and that my reaction was worse than all of the bullies... but that was no surprise to me because I could tell that I had wounded him just by the look on his face back than. He told me that he had forgiven me a long time ago and that I should try to forgive myself... that sucked worse than if he would have just spat in my face and told me to f---k off. We didnt become close friends again but we are from a small town with some mutual friends and do bump into each other from time to time and we do speak to each other just as neighbors so at least we're not on bad terms. I still regret how I reacted though; I don't think Ill ever be okay with that.

@gearyb9870 3 ай бұрын

I'm sorry such a rotten thing happened to you. I'm sure that it made you a stronger person. Looking back at my high school years, I remember how cruel kids can be at that age. I think the best thing you can do is to forgive that guy who you thought was your friend...not for his sake but for your own. This does not mean you need to involve him in your life again. Karma will eventually catch up with him. God made you who you are. Be proud!

@OrnumCR 4 ай бұрын

I know how you feel. Interesting accent you have there! I was wondering your background. A bit of Aussie in there perhaps? You deserve all that’s good that life delivers. All the very best.

@billmacneil6781 6 жыл бұрын

Wow....a great story. Thank you for sharing that. My guess with your friend is that he knew that everybody knew you and he were best friends and he figured if he didn't "strike" first they would all think he was gay too. Hopefully as an adult he is a little more loyal to his friends now. Your advice to "Klib Soccer2003" below was spot on but I hope he will also talk to someone .. There are outlets for gay kids to talk and I pray he finds one of these. All the best to you, Lucien!!

@frcgfd107 Жыл бұрын

Thanks for sharing your story.

@user-et2hv2kz6x 3 ай бұрын

I hear you. Was a bit like this in Royal Navy when all I wanted be was a regular sailor.

@leomann69 3 ай бұрын

Hey man I'm really sorry that happened to you. That must have really sucked. I wonder if he ever thought about what pain he caused you. I also wonder if you ever talked to him years later.. or maybe you will. Maybe write him a letter and let him know that his actions really caused you pain. You really cared about him as a friend. When we're young we all do stupid things. But I can tell you got a good head on your shoulders now. And by the way.. your cute AF. So.. Take that! former friend!! Haha.

@kenvanderveer623 2 ай бұрын

My brother was the first one to do that crap to me. He would find my my friends and tell them, then he and my friends were friends, and they wouldn't speak to me. Then my sisters started doing the same things. I'm now 71 and have been totally ignored by my "family" every Christmas and on my birthday for over 20 years. I hate every one of them. I have no friends left because of them. I took the attitude of "fuck you" and I am so happy I did. They are some of the most cruel people on earth, and I do not want or need them in my life.

@danielkoher1944 2 ай бұрын

Exactly, eradicate the toxicity before it consumes you.

@americaneagle6486 3 ай бұрын

You have nothing to be ashamed of. You are who you are. I am sure it is very difficult to be gay when you are 15 years old and are not ready to reveal yourself. I hope you keep moving forward in life. I hope you find someone to love and enjoy life with.

@Wowwwwed 4 ай бұрын

That does suck. Thanks for sharing a difficult time in your life.

@joesinkovits6591 3 ай бұрын

Good Lord! With friends like that, who needs enemies?

@wassytrini 3 ай бұрын

Totally distracted by your tats.... they are fantastically awesome!!

@chadcrigger3101 3 ай бұрын

Came out at 16 back in the 80s . Have only hid my sexuality once and it was for about a week at a new job but now everyone knows. I have had old friends that didn't like it and new friends that could care less about it. I have found that the ones who stick by your side are worth keeping and the ones who worry about what it means to have a gay friend are not worth keeping. You definitely are right and hopefully it helps someone.

@scottw6704 4 ай бұрын

I grew up in a different time, and here in the Bible Belt you just didn't come out AT ALL until you were grown and lived on your own, and instead of being trapped in school, you were free to surround yourself with the people you chose. So, in 1992 at the age of 20, I started the process. About ten years later, I started noticing that teens younger and younger started coming out - WHILE they were still in their parents' house. I found this to be incredibly brave, as that can be a breaking point with parents who in my time would have been likely to disown, kick you out of the house... Of course this was before social media, where within seconds, hundreds, thousands of people can know your business! All that backstory (which you didn't ask for) being said, there are people who can't simply sit on a secret. Dispensing this info immediately makes them cool, makes them THE SOURCE so they suddenly get all the attention. It seems like that very thing happened to you, and I'm sorry. In the long run, though, no matter how painful that was, it's done and over with and you were able to make decisions and move on...maybe a little earlier than you would have liked but that gave you more time to be YOU, and less time where you had to pretend to be someone else's expectation of what you should have been. Now on a shallower note, nice guns man!

@Mcfreddo 4 ай бұрын

Well Mr Luke, if you're still here and I hope you're all fit and well? It IS a despicable thing to do and it IS a big deal to get betrayed in that manor. Kudos to you and anybody going through that.

@thanh-nguyen1976 3 ай бұрын

For every negative thing that happens to you, you can alway looks back and see the positive. They help shape the person are now. They make you know what not to do and how to treat others. It creates a greater sense on empathy. The kindest, most generous, compassionate people in the world has the highest sense empathy. He may have done you a favor.

@KCGeno 4 ай бұрын

Thanks for sharing this sad story. Did your former friend ever apologize? P.S. ... Your hair was just fine.

@jackieraulerson2005 4 ай бұрын

So sorry. That sounds so painful. Have you ever confronted him as adults?

@theadorjespert 3 ай бұрын

I was forced to out myself to my family by my sister. She is so horrible. For many years, she has been a living nightmare to me, still am tbh. And at one point, she actually threatened to out me to my whole family. They had a feeling I might be bi or something, I was caught a long time ago and I got away with it telling them it was just a phase. But years later, she decided to she would tell my family. Boy was I pissed. I decided enough was enough. I told my whole family I was bi, leaning more towards gay since I have a boyfriend and I never forgave her since. Never will either.

@darinaria 2 ай бұрын

ty, I appreciate you sharing that.

@senorgato70 4 ай бұрын

This video is from 2017 and for some reason it came up on my recommendations. What is going on with Luke now?

@bbsteele671 3 ай бұрын

2015. Mine happened in 1995 at 15 in KY. The only thing I had going for me was I was 6'2, had a huge ego, & could fight. I'm so sorry this happened to you. Mine was just a friend, not my BFF. That sucks! Screw him. I'd love to know where they both are now. I know I'm 1000x better off. Thanks for the story!

@batmore1 4 ай бұрын

I am so sorry you had to experience that mean and nasty treatment by your friend that you trusted and also all of the others who treated you differently. Makes me angry. Wishing you well!

@Jim1971a 4 ай бұрын

I hope he sees this and feels sorry about it.

@algiles881 3 ай бұрын

My advice to everybody - gay or straight - is to keep your private life private. Work, like school, is something you have to do, you don't need to share everything with everybody. I never had private phone calls at work, and by the same token, when I clocked off for the day, I didn't discuss work with anybody.

@darinaria 2 ай бұрын

I understand. My very best friend wasn't anymore after he found out.